SCTV What's My Shoe Size?

[@ejej6934]

The talent on SCTV over the years was remarkable. What brilliance.

[@michael3728]

You just found that out? Yikes!

[@gerryboudreaultboudreault2608]

It's amazing that SCTV, almost 50 years old, is still far better than anything today!

[@jonnyq680]

that's 'cause it's safer to make dei crap than do funny stuff

[@stephaniecarrow4898]

Andrea Martin's Arlene Francis is wonderful. The wandering Dorothy "Kilpatrick" at the end cracked me up. :-D

[@dringo-qh1ox]

I love the fact that the panel kept their blindfolds on the whole time when in actuality they really didn't need to have blindfolds in the first place ...

[@keithpodhradsky1314]

I always love "Some kinda FREAK!"

[@Peppi94]

My friends and I have been known to shout out, "I wanna CONFERENCE!"

[@Lewis9709]

I love all these impersonations but Joe Flaherty as Kirk Douglas kills me every time. God I miss this show. There's more genuine laughs in one episode of SCTV than in 5 years of SNL

[@almostfm]

I just rewatched "Seven Days in May", and Douglas referred to another soldier as "a friend of mine", and it was _exactly_ the tone Flaherty used here. Damn near lost it.

[@TheBlueyedblond]

100 times funnier than SNL.

[@DavidIwinski]

when they were going down the line I was waiting for Kirk to say "some kind of FREAK"! awesome show!

[@detectivefiction3701]

Flaherty also did a GREAT Jack Klugman ("Quincy") impression.

[@matthewgray469]

@Lewis 970 Kirk Douglas,founder and graduate of The Clenched Teeth School of Acting

[@Katya_Lastochka]

I've yet to see a skit from SCTV that's mean spirited. Everything feels lighthearted yet accurate.

[@chrisgullett4332]

Except for the crazy Kirk Douglas, which is clearly referring to him murdering Jean Spangler. Most people do not know, because Hollywood basically swept it under the rug, but lots of people believe Douglas killed a woman named Jean Spangler. Here are some of the details. In the late 1940s when Douglas was just becoming the biggest star in Hollywood, a woman named Jean Spangler disappeared. All they ever found was her purse. In her purse is a letter to Kirk. This somehow gets out and Douglas calls the cops and for some odd reason says he is not the Kirk the letter was written to. He then lies to them and tells them he did not know Spangler, and gave them an alibi. His alibi turns out to be a lie, and he did know her, because they had just done a movie together. Here is what people suspect, he got her pregnant, she was telling him she was gonna keep the baby, so he killed her. Back in the late 1940s finding out that the top actor, who is married, got another pregnant would have been bad for his career. Bad enough to kill for. But somehow the story just went away. It just became one of those stories in Hollywood that nobody would talk about. A young actress disappears who may have been pregnant by the top actor in Hollywood. Kinda something Hollywood did not want people hearing about. Seems very suspicious that he would lie about knowing her, or that he would even call the police in the first place to tell them he did not know her.

[@roberthill799]

@Katya_Lastochka You’re not wrong but Flaherty absolutely annihilated Kirk Douglas’ hammy acting here!

[@sleeve51]

This is an epic masterpiece. Forget SNL ...SCTV was the best ever.

[@rampartrod]

so true

[@prestonlindbeck1197]

Agreed

[@waynewayne9693]

As a whole I agree but SNL In the late 70’s early 80’s was better but 98 percent of everything else on SNL has just been awful and there is no creativity on any of the comedy shows now days.

[@butchtropic8455]

You have no taste! That sucked!

[@andyskiles9542]

@@butchtropic8455 thanks for sharing!

[@spewey111]

I've been uttering the "some kind of freak!" line since I was a kid. Mostly to awkward effect.

[@shawnduffy3380]

The uninformed have no sense of humor.

[@pwgasson]

Exactly the same thing where I lost it.

[@eg4449]

My dad and I used the Some Kind of Freak line as a Go To Joke.

[@jimc4839]

Same.

[@kyokogodai-ir6hy]

"Some kind of FREAK!" LOL, Joe's Kirk Douglas was awesome! SCTV......incredible television.

[@almostfm]

He also does a dead-on Henry Fonda in the 3CP1 episode.

[@dk50b]

His Gregory Peck in Taxi Driver will blow you away...kzbin.info/www/bejne/gouoZ6x-qdxjoZo

[@senorsardonico6153]

Also in "The Grapes of Mud".

[@PaulTesta]

R.I.P. Joe Flaherty

[@jamesjoyce9207]

right down to Arlene's heart shaped pendant..they were perfectionists

[@kyokogodai-ir6hy]

Catherine also wore the mask the same way Dorothy Kilgallen wore hers. Awesome!

[@matthewgray469]

I loved the original What's My Line? And once again the SCTV cast nails the impersonation of the What's My Line panel, especially Ms.O'Haras impersonation of Dorothy Kilgallen

[@wmbrown6]

It could be argued that, over the 15 years she was on "What's My Line?," there were many Dorothy Kilgallens who were in evidence on the show. Ms. O'Hara seemed to impersonate the Kilgallen who, more often than not, was under the influence and/or drug-addled.

[@rocklobster007]

This is priceless! I love Joe Flaherty's completely unhinged Kirk Douglas

[@jimp4170]

Also seen on SCTV's Brooke Shields Show.

[@ysmigraarzygler8387]

"What kind of freak!"

[@Imintune...]

Kirk was angrier then !!!🤣

[@chrisgullett4332]

@@Imintune... I imagine he was at his angriest when he killed Jean Spangler in the 1940s.

[@catholicpriest1]

You would have to remember "What's My Line?" to fully appreciate this skit.

[@wanderingwade8877]

Which means you would have to be old, like me.

[@bufnyfan1]

"If I said I didn't like this episode I'd be LYING!!!" LOL

[@Redmenace96]

Joe Flaherty as Kirk Douglas brought the house down when we were kids. Like someone else in the comments, we would say, "Some kinda FREAK!" every chance we got. It killed every time.

[@almostfm]

If you've never seen "Seven Days in May", watch it just to hear Douglass' character say "Yesterday, I learned from a friend of mine..." Flaherty had to have used that movie as a reference, because it's exactly how Douglass said it in the movie.

[@jonnyq680]

but were you really SOME KINDA FREAK ???

[@brittainladd3374]

SCTV was a show I would never miss. My friends and me would act out each week’s skits in school and drive our teachers crazy. Joe Flaherty as Kirk Douglas, and especially Joe’s portrayal of Gregory Peck in Taxi Driver, are timeless. I had the pleasure of sitting in First Class on a flight with Katherine O’Hara. I thanked her for giving me such fond memories over the years.

[@DUCKSAREEVILLLLLLLL]

"Gangway For Miracles" with O'hara and Andrea Martin was one one of the funniest satires ever on SCTV.

[@Gods2ndFavoriteBassPlyr]

Loved it! I'm a GREAT fan of WML and love the old re-runs on 'the tube'.. This was a Brilliant parody.

[@TennTalker]

GodsFavoriteBassPlyr. Yes!!! This is genius!!!

[@jimc4839]

The illegible handwriting was funny in itself. The whole sketch was brilliant.

[@glennmarshall4693]

when John signed his name on the board, I just about lost it, just the way he signed it. hehehehheheh

[@eg4449]

It's a brilliant capsule of an idiot trying to write down something for the themselves and not being aware who needs to read it. The lack of the character's self awareness and simultaneous awkwardness is hilarious.

[@university89]

Oh my! That Arelene Francis was so spot on :D

[@danyluk1]

"Could your feet be used to propel a small sea-going vessel?"

[@phillycinephile8282]

My favorite line, and one that has randomly popped into my head many times over the past 40+ years.

[@fattymcfatso1083]

Catherine's impersonation of Dorothy Kilgallen is edgy, and shows SCTV's willingness to "go there". "My face hurts." LOL

[@wmbrown6]

Sounds like she was impersonating the Kilgallen who was on the influence as often as not, and whose behaviors led to "What's My Line?" panel moderator John Charles Daly to become "offish" with her. Not the Kilgallen who was a brilliant deducer in the show's early years.

[@ARIZJOE]

She was trying hard, but it did not capture Dorothy's snooty, patrician nature. It's a miss.

[@allys744]

The two men trying to pronounce “Stubing” 😂😭

[@Requiescat_in_pace]

The Half Wits skit is another classic

[@joestrike8537]

Oh good God yes - I almost had a stroke laughing at that one - John Candy looked like a Don Martin character come to life.

[@iVenge]

These guys were the best.

[@FerdinandCesarano]

That's "Steubing". Like "beef stew", but cut the "beef"; and "Bing Crosby", but cut the "Crosby".

[@johnwango2488]

Andrea Martin laugh is classic and Joe Flaherty does a better Kirk Douglas then Kirk Douglas.

[@BrianBattles]

He's dead now.

[@rmelin13231]

They nailed it, no doubt. Right down to Arlene Franklin's heart-shaped necklace. Remarkable.

[@JasperJokerII]

Back when tv was great. Make tv great again

[@mt.rushmore7916]

We love you, Johnny! Never to be forgotten.

[@aaronschowe9037]

When I was a teen ,my freinds and I would stay home on the weekend just to watch SCTV. Thank you for the memories!

[@chaplainmattsanders4884]

“Since age four” 😂 John candy…hilarious

[@bareknuckles2u]

...some kind of FREAK!!

[@mikebarbacovi9851]

SCTV was brilliant.

[@hardlines4]

One of the greatest shows ever!

[@stevebalden1868]

One of the best and funniest shows ever

[@BethyKable]

Great spoof on What’s My Line......such a weird show but they did it justice!

[@olddisneylandtickets]

I had no idea what "whats my line" was when I first saw this SCTV sketch in the early 80's, but it was still funny as heck! Now I'm binge watching all the older Whats My Line shows (1950 to 1967) and it just makes this even more funny!

[@wmbrown6]

Based on the way the opening for this spoof was, it seemed the "SCTV" producers were drawing from the way the syndicated 1968-75 episodes opened, given the background music as the panelists came out and introduced the others.

[@vasp99]

I loved this sketch long before I even knew there'd been a show called What's My Line and now decades later having seen it and lived this I love and appreciate the brilliance of this sketch even more! Genius!

[@kkroeger5868]

This is the difference I see between SNL and SCTV. SNL skits often have brilliant concepts but the execution is disappointing; SCTV takes bizarre and non-sensical concepts and the execution is brilliant - SCTV benefitted from having stronger improvisational actors (though SNL had a few over time as well)

[@grayforester]

Most of the cast understood the distinction "clowning" and knew how crucial it could be in adding laughs to a smart high concept sketch. Among SNL's many casts, (puppetry major) Kate McKinnon seems to understand this best. SCTV rules even now.

[@freedapeeple4049]

@@grayforester Imagine if SCTV had Kate McKinnon and Kristen Wiig...

[@bufnyfan1]

I love when Kirk Douglas (Joe Flaherty)-finds out that the shoe size is actually a "Size 16"--(5:06) and he starts screeching "FREAK, FREAK" LOL!!!!

[@RonMotta1972]

Dear lord this shoe was so good…adieu, Joe Flaherty.

[@critter7052]

...".I'd like to say the moderator is a good friend of mine but If I did I'd be LYING!" nyuk nyuk nyuk.....SCTV rules the comedy universe! (especially over the perpetually lame-o SNL)Thanks for posting!

[@wmbrown6]

The irony is that the real-life Kirk Douglas was never a guest panelist on "What's My Line?," but made two mystery guest appearances; however, his second wife, the former Anne Buydens, was a guest panelist for one show after Miss Kilgallen's death.

[@thefuturemrs.billhader5767]

When this originally aired, my sister and I about blew a lung over Flaherty's Douglas. I literally was hoarse for 2 days

[@hodgepodgebuhgodge3739]

Best Kirk Douglas impression since Maurice La Marche.

[@hodgepodgebuhgodge3739]

Hodgepodge Buhgodge Joe Flaherty is hi-larious as Kirk Douglas.

[@JohnSmith-kz8yo]

he's good but Frank Gorshin was the best ever.

[@kyokogodai-ir6hy]

Yes, Gorshin was superior, but I don't think he could have pulled this off. Only Joe could do that!

[@KillerBebe]

We had a kid in the army with a size 14 and I use the line, you could power a small seagoing craft with those... he did not appreciate the humor, but the rest of the squad did get a laugh out of it.

[@rocklobster007]

....and Joe's William F. Buckley (in a different sketch) is dead on!

[@Drew_D]

Just the voices alone were hilarious!

[@martinphilip8998]

The best skit I’ve seen! I grew up with What’s My Line and I’ve Got a Secret.

[@brianbagnall3029]

How did Dave Thomas not crack up having to say those lines?

[@sirslice7531]

Great spoof of What's My Line?"! They even included Arlene's necklace!

[@johnjones3714]

Wonderful ,has me laughing even to this day

[@guitargeorge1874]

Lol! I'm 30 years old and I find SCTV absolutely hilarious. Back when TV shows were actually funny. Nothing but garbage on the tube these days. Rest in peace Mr. Johnny LaRue:)

[@Sarah_Gravydog316]

lol i used to watch the Flintstones & SCTV at home for lunch every day it was awesome! (...then i had to go back to school :(

[@freedapeeple4049]

Yes. There's a very good reason I haven't owned a TV since the 90s (and I should have ditched them 10 years sooner)

[@o.b.v.i.u.s]

I once stood behind Joe Flaherty in a checkout line at the grocery store and I just started laughing out loud, remembering his Kirk Douglas impersonation.

[@ARIZJOE]

An acquaintance hosted Pittsburgh television of Joe Flaherty as grand marshal of a holiday parade, and that was such a real life parody I broke down in laughter.

[@ejej6934]

@@ARIZJOE I always assumed Joe Flaherty's Monster Chiller Horror Theater on SCTV was inspired by Chiller Theater, which was a long-running weekend program of horror movies on a channel in Pittsburgh. It was hosted by a guy named Bill "Chilly Billy" Cardille.

[@ARIZJOE]

@@ejej6934 Perhaps. Not far from Toronto. But there were a lot of those guys, like the father of director Paul Thomas Anderson who was famous for "Ghoulardi" in Cleveland.

[@williamlawrence5686]

The cast of this show were television icons . We need to enjoy enjoy a good laugh . Need to watch John Candy in Planes , trains , and automobiles again. Holliday classic.

[@sushicourier]

Kirk Douglas: "What kind of FREAK!"

[@savvycha]

best tv ever

[@socksumi]

One of their best sketches.

[@PawtucketPromenade]

I love these wacky ensemble pieces :)

[@Joe-oh8oe]

Barry…S…STOL….Stoleman…Mr Barry Steckman….is with us…Mr. EUB Stubling is with us tonight…..

[@dashoverton1963]

Men in the 1950s and early 1960s used to wear dress shoes in that shape and shine, but not that size. Lol.

[@MerleOberon]

Andrea nailed Arlene.

[@ScottShawPhoto]

LITERALLY!

[@ScottShawPhoto]

Well maybe not.

[@christopherdunne7848]

Andrea nailed the voice of--of all ppl-Phyllis Newman! See SCTV’s Merv Griffin’s take on Close Encounters.

[@valhallaforever1]

Size 16 since age 4!

[@fanboy2015]

Good Arlene Francis impersonation

[@SmokeRingsPipeDreams]

I so loved SCTV, the funniest show on television.

[@phillipford8149]

I wish I could say it'd be a pleasure to give this a dislike; but IF I DID I'D BE LYING!

[@NevadaBoss]

One of Joe's best...RIP the great Kirk Douglas. And who can take his place? I DONT KNOW! I HAVEN'T GOT A CLUE!!

[@leoverran311]

Didn’t know he died, 104, that’s amazing

[@roybatty3194]

Eugene Levy is reminiscent of Andy Kaufman here....more so from the way he looks in this particular piece than anything else.

[@wmbrown6]

True . . . he didn't really look that much like John Charles Daly here . . .

[@BrodyJoeandBriars]

Screamin' hilarious!

[@glennmarshall4693]

I saw the What's my line show of the 70s, I saw the older ones a few years ago Dorothy was killed after an episode of the show,

[@fatdogtavern]

SOME KINDA FREAK!

[@genki2genki]

Eugene Levy's eyebrows!

[@marcschneider4845]

I remember the original What's My Line, which just shows old I am.

[@johnclavis]

Its not just funny, its also believable as a sort of alternate reality 😂

[@cannedlaughter2535]

Catherine O'Hara sounds like Gollum, don't you think-my precious.

[@Shteve67]

Hilarious!! 😂

[@WindTurbineSyndrome]

Sctv best satire of tv radio film theatre never equaled

[@SmokeRingsPipeDreams]

Yeah, television. It was this thing people watched back in the eighties. It was this huge box that sat on the carpet in people's living rooms. It's hard to believe today, but people actually spent hours watching these boxes. (kind of like they watch computer screens today) Sometimes you can still find these magical boxes in people homes, but mostl old people who aren't aware of "the internets" ;)

[@Candyliz2003]

The only show that gave SNL a run for their money.

[@joestrike8537]

and obliterated them in the process!

[@almostfm]

@@joestrike8537 This cast made most of the SNL casts looked like they picked people out of the audience in a lottery.

[@i-a-g-r-e-e-----f-----jo--b]

I like to come back to this skit to watch Flaherty do Kirk Douglas, too funny, thanks for posting it SCTV! I remember how boring daytime pre cable TV was as a kid and this was the only thing on at times besides soaps and I would actually watch What's My Line at age 9! Cringe to watch now, lol. BTW, I've watch this skit so many times I knew Candy's character last name before he wrote it down.

[@robertcombs55]

Genius

[@adrock4737]

Poor Mr. "Steub-ling."

[@socksumi]

Mr Stu--bing.

[@keepercoach]

Brilliant

[@electricheadboy]

Miss Kilpatrick sounds like Jennifer Tilly

[@lkern6238]

"Arlene Francis" is now the nun in Evil.

[@jerrydiem7755]

it's brilliantI watched some of those shows and they nailed it.Also,they seem heavily influenced by firesign theater's bit on you tv,an idea they started.In 1969 firesign released an album called don't crush that dwarf,hand me the pliers.In it,it has a bit ,calling it yoytv for you the viewer.it's strange how that album and sctv prefigured the creation of youtube.

[@spockboy]

So damned good.

[@RideAcrossTheRiver]

I wish I could have a print of that thumbnail on my wall.

[@Imintune...]

Everyone in the 50s were nicely attired and politely mannered unlike today society.

[@BrianBattles]

Mad Katt No they weren't, you weren't there. Plenty of slobs.

[@717rocket]

This was 1979. Retro spoof of 50s gameshow.

[@mikepatrick5909]

@@BrianBattles Society was different then though...cops would drive their patrol cars in pairs...

[@BrianBattles]

@@mikepatrick5909 In some towns. Not everywhere. My uncle was a cop in East Hartford CT in the 1950s and '60s, and he patrolled alone all the time.

[@atworkstation]

RIP Joe Flahrety (1941-2024).

[@justme8340]

“He’s a FREAK!”

[@robtoe2]

It's weird seeing a reference to "Cerb" in Canada these days.

[@TheSecurityCamChannel]

John Candy kinda reminds me of Matt Foley.

[@jimp4170]

Wish they hadn't dubbed in the laugh track when they released the dvds in the US.

[@scottl.1568]

Bob Lanier wants to know their location

[@itiswhatitaintanditaintwha1427]

Size 16? I'll bet his wife is happy!

[@OriginalRocketJock]

SIZE NINE!?

[@coophandluke3697]

Sctv was funnier than SNL ever was!!

[@futuristica1710]

I was looking for that comment. Sigh! So predictable…

[@coophandluke3697]

@@futuristica1710 predict this...dipshit

[@coophandluke3697]

@@futuristica1710 SNL hasn't been funny in YEARS!

[@coophandluke3697]

@@futuristica1710 and at least a dozen snl alum came from sctv