Seasonal lesson: you are not the events of your life. You are here to grow.

[@annpatrykus3637]

Omgawd, girl, i resonate so much with this. Your honesty and vulnerability is appreciated. Thank you.

[@DanielleComesBack]

I'm glad it helped you! Thanks for watching!

[@ilish25]

Your videos showed up just tonight in my feed. This is "our" 12th holiday season alone. It's just myself and my adult, mentally ill daughter. No family wants to be with us. My ex husband hasn't seen our daughter in over 20 years. Mentally ill people were not supposed to be part of his life. So, he left. I don't enjoy the holidays anymore. Haven't been able to do gifts, special foods, or even any holiday decorations for many years. My daughter's illness has bankrupted me. Life is sad, hard, but, I do know that God loves us. Every year I look at pictures of items I would like for my daughter, but, can not have. Once, I was married, happily I thought, my daughter was healthy, smart and beautiful. I knew that God had good plans for our future. I never dreamed my husband would leave us, I would be unable to pay for all my daughter's care, and it would be just the 2 of us living together. Her mental illness is difficult to be around. But, I'm her mother 💔 I will never desert her God Loves you dear ones 🙏 ❤ 🙏

[@DanielleComesBack]

That’s really tough. I’m hopeful that it can start feeling better a bit at a time. I’ve lived through bankruptcy and mental illness myself and it is a massive strain on all relationships, not just with your spouse. Thinking of you! ❤️‍🩹

[@carsonl.8788]

Your are certainly a very strong lady. To be able to share your past and present situation with others takes alot of courage. Please know that you are helping many others in simular situations....you are helping other people. You are an inspiration to others also. Wishing you the very best. Thank you. 😊

[@DanielleComesBack]

Thank you for letting me know this is helpful! Sometimes it’s hard to know because you’re just talking to the camera, you know? 😅

[@shauncasey8295]

New subscriber. This is the second video of yours that I've watched. The other was the one on being alone on Christmas. I'm on year 5 of being alone on Christmas so i can relate for sure! I wish you all the best, you are a very beautiful person!

[@DanielleComesBack]

Thanks! Nice to meet you! It’s working out well to have a quiet life both during Christmas and in general. Glad you’re enjoying your time too.

[@shauncasey8295]

@@DanielleComesBack Nice to meet you too! I'm binging on some of your videos and realize we have a lot in common. Our upbringing, marital situation, and even the situation with the child. I hope you have success with your channel and life in general! I for one would like you to stick around! Now let me get back to your videos 😂

[@heidipillhofer855]

Hi Danielle, I also had a very difficult life experience that still does pop up every so oftet and it hits me like it just happened recently. Thank you for your words and sharing your insight.

[@DanielleComesBack]

As they say, “healing is not linear.” It’s normal to have good and bad days with stuff. It’s nice to meet you, btw! 🤗

[@cheryl1338]

This really resonated with me. I went through some very challenging times the last few years and I felt that I lost my connection with my son because I was so shut down emotionally. Earlier this year I told him what had been going on and that I felt really bad that I was so distant and wanted to reconnect. He has been really sweet about it, he is also in a better place in his personal life, so we are slowly getting more comfortable with each other. For me, being patient with the process and nonjudgmental with us has helped.

[@DanielleComesBack]

That is great news. Patience is definitely key with reconnection. I try to remind myself that things didn't happen overnight that caused any distance to grow, therefore reestablishing closeness can't be reached overnight either.

[@pattydixon6510]

This is such a wonderful message. I think when you live long enough you go through these dark seasons. I struggle with forgiveness, to be honest, some things are very hard to get past. But I can be imperfect and still do my best. Thank for the reminder, you are a warrior! ❤

[@DanielleComesBack]

I think most of us struggle with forgiveness! We're taught that it's "weakness" by society. Quite the opposite is true. You're correct about being imperfect and doing your best. We're never perfect, so the idea of needing to be so in order to forgive is an impossible standard. Thanks for the comment!

[@shelleycharlesworth5177]

-The loss of family members and close friends certainly makes the holidays seem more melancholy. As I've gotten older the magic is gone and I think that is natural because of those losses. I was just saying to someone today, "remember how it used to be", so I guess a part of me is stuck in the past too. It's probably my age - 77. It seems important to acknowledge our feelings and take care of that fragile spirit inside of us. Staying clear of the hectic world out there. People talk about holidays like Christmas being the same year after year. They never are. Children grow up and move away. Grandchildren arrive. They grow up. Parents die. Change is constant. Taking the best of the holidays and memories and holding them close while recognizing that grief is my way of coping.

[@DanielleComesBack]

I miss my grandparents a lot this time of year. I was lucky enough to have them for a long time. My grandfather died when I was 40 and my grandmother 2 years later. When I get down about that loss, I always end up going back to how, in their own time, they were each very ready to go. It's easier for me to see, in those moments, that I'm really only sad for myself. They're having another experience now, having left their bodies which were worn out. Nobody's ever really gone, but bodies need to be abandoned eventually. I don't know if that's helpful in any way, but I wouldn't want you to suffer any more than necessary. Thanks for the comment. You're loved.

[@debbieharlow7484]

Your videos are helpful for moving forward along the twisty path of life. 🌲

[@DanielleComesBack]

Thanks! I hope they help others as well!

[@PennyMain-dm4ci]

Your channel is a blessing and will be for so many I am so grateful to be here and looking forward to catching up on your videos Merry Christmas to you and everyone ♥️🎄🎅🏻☃️

[@jonesygirl34]

Oh my gosh girl your telling my “Story” much love to you and your path of growth ❤

[@DanielleComesBack]

Glad to resonate with you!

[@tonysmith8379]

“Affliction is the good man’s shining scene; prosperity conceals his brightest ray; as night to stars, woe lustre gives to man.” Edward Young

[@DanielleComesBack]

True--it's all a matter of perspective.

[@bigmike2298]

Perfect message!! It's taken me several years of internal inventory to be able to discover thst everything has happened exactly the way it was supposed to for me to be here where I am now!

[@DanielleComesBack]

Exactly! You wouldn't be here now unless everything else happened the way it did first.

[@tomtroy3792]

🤔 happy holidays!🤩

[@DanielleComesBack]

And to you as well! Thanks!

[@loribethel9005]

There must of been a reason I came across your YT site. The things you said really were very much things I had happened. Now this is my 2nd Christmas alone in a different state. Trying to be positive, but far from it. Thank you for this video. I suffer from dysthymic depression. My child witness how terrible I was mentally. She is now an adult. My divorce just became final a month ago. It is not easy. Please keep up your postings.

[@DanielleComesBack]

Isn't that interesting? The year I turned 20 I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. More than 20 years later, my current doctor who has been treating me since 2012, has said he would be more inclined, given my history, to diagnose me with Dysthymia too. My child saw it all and it was greatly affected by it, which I will always regret more than anything in my past.

[@luciamixon4156]

Thank you for your video. I needed to hear that I am more than how I feel. I go to mass and need to spend more time in prayer with the community. I am sorry. You're right it's life and we can learn and find some peace. What is it teaching me ? 👍🙏 Logic. Someone said stop trying to figure it out. Yep. My sad story or finally awaken to horror was 2010. It had to happen or I guess everyone get a cross. Perspective. Btw, Bezzy app is a community of very supportive people.

[@DanielleComesBack]

Sounds like you know what you need to feel better right now and that's great! Acceptance of the past is imperative to have a good present and thus a good future.

[@thecregs4665]

Absolutely you are not defined by the past ..of course we wish things could have different and yes their will be some consequences to our actions. The great thing is Romans 8:28 tells us ALL things work together for good to those that Love God. I love this verse! Because I see how He has used some things that I have done ( not so great ) and turned them around for good in my later years. You ..talking to people on things you've gone through is also helpful and kind ❤

[@LonelyGamr]

Good job on weight loss 👍

[@sheilab4978]

❤

[@robinfarmer4787]

Honey you are not a failure you are a beautiful person maybe your son is just going through a faze your not a bad person he should forgive and forget this time is too short

[@DanielleComesBack]

I was doing my best at that time and for that I forgive myself. I know how hard it is to forgive family, so I am willing to leave space for time to help with perspective.

[@DanielleComesBack]

These things take the time they take. All I can do is allow that.

[@paulamartin6049]

Baby girl i feel for you . we have similar stories to tell if i am reading between the lines correctly. i have 3 daughters 20 19 17 and i have been healing myself and our relationship with them for past 2 years . Its been so hard but its so much better now. my no means perfect but getting there . Gone is the hate disrespect phyiscal and mental abuse . All of which i never blamed them for they were turned against and were simply to young to know any better. they are with me now not because they have to but because they want to . I missed their childhood but i accept i cant dwell on that nor can i get it back however we are building adult mother daughter relationships and i couldnt be more proud . Anything is achievable if you set you mind to it px

[@nadinenc3097]

Where's the other channel please?

[@DanielleComesBack]

It's @danielajumelle3133. It won't let me link it here in a comment, but it's also listed in the video description box for your convenience.

[@LucitaBrown]

I hope that your son watches your videos. He will come around.

[@DanielleComesBack]

In time he might. It took me 20+ years with my father, so I understand the struggle.

[@snlovesjn]

❤