Shadow Glamour | Witch Craft and Self-esteem

[@poetryalpastor]

It's interesting to hear you talk about how you perceive your beauty; I've always thought you were very pretty in a sort of old-fashioned, but not dated, way. Hearing you talk about feeling handsome and such makes me think of a lot of transmasculine friends and how they transitioned at least partially because they wanted to access this kind of feminine masculinity that they either weren't afforded by our beauty standards or felt they couldn't fulfill regardless.

[@RubyRouge-zj8uw]

This vulnerable discussion brought me back to my early '20s when I hit the roughest patch so far in my physical and mental health, especially when you touched on the struggles to not hate your appearance and develop an appropriate loving relationship with yourself when you're surrounded by a culture that festers insecurity (your comments about a loving mother figure talking poorly about herself in front of you resonated with me emotionally too 😢). Shadow/glamour work so far appeals to me the most in my exploration of atheist/secular witchcraft because it relates to the inner work I've already had to commit to get healthier and happier! As someone who can still feel nervous and self-conscious about experimenting with clothing, your fashion aesthetic is lovely to me! 🖤

[@Emileech666]

I almost cried when you mentioned how if love isn't unconditional then it really isn't love ❤ I needed to hear that.

[@TheAtheopaganismChannel]

This is a really courageous video. Thank you for your candor and your wisdom.

[@mysticalmirth]

This one really hit home hard, but in a good way. Self bullying is something I am constantly tackeling. I really appreciate you taking a chance to be vulnerable in this one. It's tough and scary, but you presented yourself with candor as always. Thank you!

[@KJ-wh8fu]

Yes, courageous and wise and intelligent and insightful. I'm sure many will identify with and appreciate you sharing your experience and compassionate perspective. For what it is worth, you are lovely!

[@Seasteader]

Heard about your channel on The Wonder! I feel like I’ve been looking for all of you my whole life! Please keep making videos. You are an inspiration!

[@sarahhazelwood6803]

Not a mess at all! I feel like you had so many excellently explained points. Thank you so much for gathering the courage to share this!

[@ivangelinem.9479]

just found your videos today as a beginner atheist witch, ive been working really hard lately when i view my body to remember artwork from history like you were saying, i weight more now than i ever have before and it’s hard sometimes, i have a therapist that i see but this encourages me to do shadow work and self exploration on my own too

[@rebeccathorne8548]

This is a great reminder for how I talk about myself around my kids. Thank you.

[@balmylagoon]

Completely agree on all points. I have always struggled with how I look (a common ailment). I recently took the plunge and shaved my head because I was so frustrated with my hair and not being able to make it look how I wanted. It's forced me to see myself in a completely different way. Now I'm getting into glamour magic myself, playing with wigs and really dramatic makeup, both of which are things I've never done. It's been so much fun as I get to explore how I can manipulate and morph my image.

[@yupyup5895]

I'm so happy to see another video from my favourite secular witch😍.

[@1980rlquinn]

The "come" in "comely" is pronounced like the verb, "to come." It means "pretty" in exactly the same way "fetching" does. It comes from an earlier form, "becomely," which I think is an excellent thing to be called after working glamour magick! :) And I would make one suggestion: Instead of using the word "self-esteem," which can have an element of ego-protection and focuses on comparisons with others, how about "self-compassion"? This change in wording and approach has been in the media a bit over the last couple of years as a key difference between counterproductive and effective self-edification.

[@BetzelemElokim]

Love love love "fetching," haven't thought about that word in years!

[@sophiea3229]

Great video - it really resonated with me on so many levels, then you said “bog witch” and now I’m convinced you’re in my brain. Ps I love that frog

[@almapa3434]

Thank you for this video, it was very uplifting. I liked the concept of practising being neutral towards yourself instead of calling yourself beautiful. The “everyone is beautiful” discourse rubs me the wrong way because it still emphasises beauty as an ideal to strive for, or as something we need in order to be worthy. Also, thanks for speaking against the “if you don’t love yourself you can’t expect others to love you”. I find that saying really damaging for those who struggle with a negative self-concept, or at least it was to me when I struggled with it.

[@cheekygingerdoesstuff7223]

Good video. Yes, the internalized misogyny ... it's just so harmful in so many ways. It's been that way for a long time. I don't hold much hope for growing out of societal ills, but I do hope at least we're having some movement on this issue.

[@lozziestardust01]

I really appreciate this video, it made me realise how much I "will" love myself "when" & not now. I saw you at AWitchCon and you talked about "Shame" not being a helpful emotion, that really stuck with me. I feel a lot of my negative feedback is linked to "shame" and have been using that in my shadow work. 💜

[@pru3230]

Thank you so much for making this video! So insightful and helpful! Ever since you mentioned it before I've been thinking about this and started to practice in my own way :)

[@aceofspades3973]

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and experiences

[@BetzelemElokim]

Damn, girl, just @ me next time! I feel like I owe you a co-pay. Thank you for putting together in one place so many threads I've been hearing about and thinking about for years but never all together at one time. (Also happy for the real talk about mantras feeling so cringe-y!) I hate to say it, but I wish there was a non-witchy version of this that I could send to several people who I need to stop talking like this around my daughters! And something which I think often gets lost in these conversations is that all my "problem people" on this issue are cis hetero men - that's where the diet culture is coming from. The femmes are feeling the burden hardest in our culture, but it's all of us, and they're not talking about these issues yet. If you don't already follow Alok Menon and haven't read their book, you absolutely must - right up your alley here. Even though I've done a lot of work here and assumed I would be the "problem," my kids are still hearing it anyway, and I have to fight against the Southern woman upbringing to "make" these men uncomfortable by challenging those statements which almost feel like a social lubricant to them (a given fact that is a safe topic of conversation), which I'm very inconsistent about because of that OTHER patriarchal issue. So much easier to just do my work and hope it provides a good counterbalance alternative, especially by widening that beauty standard. I literally took an entire page of notes. THANK YOU.

[@lucyjanssen7860]

So this is irrelevant but not: I had a dream the other day that I was paling around with you at a festival of some kind and you were showing me how to administer insulin to people at the festival with diabetes. I feel like this meant that you have been guiding me to do important things through witchcraft irl. My brain did it’s fancy nighttime hallucinations magic to remind me that I’ve been lucky to find your channel 🥰 figured I’d share. I’m glad you’re here!

[@SednaWoo]

I'm so happy I got to go to a festival with you in your dream even if it was to administer first aid 😆 I hope we at least got to wear cute outfits.

[@cheekygingerdoesstuff7223]

FANCY NIGHTTIME HALLUCINATIONS MAGIC I like you so much.

[@corylouwho]

Everything about this video was so wonderful and relatable!

[@heathercackles]

Great and courageous video! I had never considered combining the two. I must add that you do not look like a boy who looks like a girl! You look like one of those beautiful 1920's film stars to me.

[@victwria07s]

for real, your thoughts are amazing!

[@gilbertvale5566]

Really lovely video just subscribed and turned on notifications. You’re a very real person and I appreciate that. The Burns comment had me cracking up.

[@SednaWoo]

Thank you so much for subscribing!

[@DeLaSoul246]

I love this! Thanks for this video 😊

[@D0J0Master]

Great vid, would love to see even more examples of using shadow work

[@bassamaboona6444]

I love this video so much! Thank you so very much! 😊

[@naa4530]

so good and agree on so many points

[@ireallylovecilantro]

Wonderful video! I disagree with love not being conditional: my love for others is conditional because I expect boundaries and respect. I think this may be different for self-love of course.

[@SednaWoo]

Yes, yes, yes! Boundaries are a must when handling other people. Unconditional love for yourself 🥰

[@ireallylovecilantro]

@@SednaWoo Definitely!

[@BetzelemElokim]

I agree with what you're trying to say, but I think the idea here really is *respect,* not love. Unconditional love is really respecting people AS PEOPLE WHO ARE WORTHY. Even when they don't "deserve" it, and setting boundaries with people is also respect. For instance, this is easier to see with kids. Toddlers have literally no useful boundaries or respect for other people, pretty much only un-useful ones (like "you are ruining my life by trying to bathe me"). But we still have "unconditional love" for them, and I think we "should" see that too with parents and adult children. Even when we screw up in our 50s, our parents "should" still love us. Because it's not love the way we've been conditioned to think of love. Heirarchies depend on love being conditional, and even healthy conditions give people the excuse to dehumanize and disrespect because we often had warped ideas of what our own boundaries and respect "should" be. We see that more clearly in the un-chosen relationships we're expected by society to keep no matter what, even toxic family relationships we are pressured to maintain at all costs because of "love," but the trick is taking that same respect-love and applying it to *everyone.* It's the core of what I personally think is supposed to be the message of "everyone is made in God's image."

[@madams3478]

Maybe love and respect are separately highly important things? It could easily be the case that I love someone, but realize that I can’t live with them. This second point because of respect to self.

[@peergynt3008]

Mr. Burns, whispering the agenda of corporate greed in your ear. "Yes, hate yourself! The only way you can a good, good, beautiful person is to buy this product made from petroleum and baby seal blubber!"

[@scenestress]

Thanks Sedna, I'll share this on my Secular Witches of Australia page. FYI you may/may not have any control over the type of ads that appear on your videos. An ad came up promoting the reptilian conspiracy theory and some other strange stuff. Just an FYI. Thanks again for the content and for sharing your thoughts 💚

[@SednaWoo]

Thanks for sharing with your group! Yeah, unfortunately I can't control the ads. Lizard people conspiracy ads? KZbin, why? 🤦🏻‍♀️

[@scenestress]

@@SednaWoo 😂

[@Spiritdove64]

HOPE YOUR OK. I HEARD A CALL IN FROM A PAGAN ON THE THINKING ATHEIST. I LOVE HIS REASON FOR HIM BEING A WITCH. HE SAID HE CAN REMOVE THE HAPPY YOUNG MIND FOR MAGIC EVEN IF IT WAS NOT. ITS WHAT MADE HIM HAPPY. THATS WHAT IT IS FOR ME. I LEAVE OUT THE DARK. BEEN THERE WAY TO LONG FOR YEARS. TURNING 65 NOW GOING THROUGH MY SECOND CHILDHOOD. SORRY FOR CAPS KEYBOARD MESSED UP. ONE ON ORDER. :d

[@Wet_bread123]

Shoutout to that boomer parent trauma!