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Should SONS be raised differently than DAUGHTERS | Jubilee NAILED IT.

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Aba N Preach

Aba N Preach

Күн бұрын

Original Video --- • Should Sons Be Raised ...
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@AbaNPreach
@AbaNPreach 3 жыл бұрын
This is a great jubilee Video. We not trolling, when the content is good, the content is good. Leave em a like and a comment to encourage em.
@blacksheepnomad9000
@blacksheepnomad9000 3 жыл бұрын
Allegedly
@anim8dideas849
@anim8dideas849 3 жыл бұрын
This seemed obvious
@andrewcook2625
@andrewcook2625 3 жыл бұрын
This is the earliest I've ever been here but it's was worth it just for that Jafar joke... that shit had me dying
@blacksheepnomad9000
@blacksheepnomad9000 3 жыл бұрын
@@shwarmaandmamool2987 way more nuance in this topic then your uncomprehensible example
@bethyant1192
@bethyant1192 3 жыл бұрын
I totally agree that our sons have to be raised differently than our daughters. The world can be an evil, ugly place
@neile5893
@neile5893 3 жыл бұрын
When you have multiple children you won’t even raise them the same. Different personalities respond to different approaches.
@brandontrammel4581
@brandontrammel4581 3 жыл бұрын
Exactly
@YK-be8rx
@YK-be8rx 3 жыл бұрын
Just to be the devils advocate here (I like your reasoning and didn't even think of this), could the argument to this be, well you're still teaching your kids the same life lessons just in a different way for them to understand it (2+2 still equals 4 but some kids understand this lesson through road A and some understand it through road B). IDK I'm just asking questions lol
@nathanielbaxter8044
@nathanielbaxter8044 3 жыл бұрын
@@YK-be8rx it depends. Boys and girls sometimes need to learn vastly different life lessons.
@YK-be8rx
@YK-be8rx 3 жыл бұрын
@@nathanielbaxter8044 That's true yes I agree. There are some lessons that you would teach girls that you wouldn't teach boys and vise versa. But I think for the most part, important life lessons are non-gender (I know I know but I couldn't think of another way to word it), respecting others and their opinion even if they're different from yours, the value of family and knowledge,/education, right from wrong, self-worth, etc. I think that we go about teaching these things to boys and girls just in different way.
@biancapetty9624
@biancapetty9624 3 жыл бұрын
Facts!
@chadpowell1832
@chadpowell1832 3 жыл бұрын
Girl it is MIDNIGHT you’re 14! And you’re not answering your phone . Honestly I’d be more worried if the father DIDNT call for help
@Gingersnaps_the_pumpkin_kitty
@Gingersnaps_the_pumpkin_kitty 3 жыл бұрын
It's honestly more about the age there. Like if my 14 year old did that PERIOD I'd be calling the cops.
@lindensalter6713
@lindensalter6713 3 жыл бұрын
Yeah I would call the cops regardless if it was my son or daughter
@TomikaKelly
@TomikaKelly 3 жыл бұрын
True, but I think it's mostly the fact that he would've been nonchalant had it been her brother. If EITHER of my children were missing at midnight I'd panic.
@Vladimir-wh5hs
@Vladimir-wh5hs 3 жыл бұрын
"But if my *17* year old brother did it!!"
@crustydrag0n793
@crustydrag0n793 3 жыл бұрын
My brother brings this up a lot. He wonders why he always had to check in even though I didn't, and it was just something simple as, he was more reckless than me. My parents knew that. I matured faster than my brother. That's also a factor that should be considered.
@ChrisMcKee087
@ChrisMcKee087 3 жыл бұрын
If I was a father of a 14 year old boy and he was gone until midnight without calling, I might do the same thing. That's actually pretty outrageous that she did that.
@NotAnotherKuromi
@NotAnotherKuromi 2 жыл бұрын
Yes I makes me think wonder if he wasn't protective enough of his son? I'd be interested to see how the son was treated at 14.
@onehairybuddha
@onehairybuddha 2 жыл бұрын
@@NotAnotherKuromi She said her brother was three years older and it seemed that at 14 she thought she should be treated more like her 17 year old brother, which is pretty much what you'd expect of a 14 year old. I find it hard to imagine that the lad was treated any differently at 14, but the situation may not have arisen.
@DunKirk1st
@DunKirk1st 2 жыл бұрын
My dad thought I was kidnapped one time when I went home the next day when I told him that I'll be home the day before at the afternoon. He wooped my ass after
@elvickRULES
@elvickRULES 2 жыл бұрын
Man, I was gone all day from home when my dog ran off and I followed her. Dad didn’t even notice. I was 10/11. (Luckily dog walked near a friend of mine’s house and his mom saw me and drove me home with the dog, forget how I finally was able to get her back). I’d have loved to have had a parent give a shit lmao. At least notice, damn.
@ballershanelle
@ballershanelle 2 жыл бұрын
@@elvickRULES yo..it depends. Many country & suburb kids get pushed out the door to play. u come in for food and go back out until dark chase u back home. Parents figure u aight in the area or home .but, i think if u were out at 10 during the whole nite..u may have caused a heart attack
@skydogace
@skydogace 3 жыл бұрын
The bald headed guy with the glasses looks like the dude that helped Tony Stark when he was captured by terrorists in the first Iron Man movie
@giana6068
@giana6068 3 жыл бұрын
LMAOOOO
@sta_rlight5564
@sta_rlight5564 3 жыл бұрын
Omg yah!! Lol
@tear4567
@tear4567 3 жыл бұрын
Yensen 😢
@moonknight4053
@moonknight4053 3 жыл бұрын
Hahaha yinsen*
@GottesKrieger
@GottesKrieger 3 жыл бұрын
Boys and girls should be raised differently, but only in the areas where there are actual differences.
@sebjornsprauten1406
@sebjornsprauten1406 3 жыл бұрын
and boom there you have it, spare the 15 minutes of privleged kids being given boundries
@woozihae
@woozihae 3 жыл бұрын
aye.
@daniellemurray8914
@daniellemurray8914 3 жыл бұрын
period.
@alessandraberetta6982
@alessandraberetta6982 3 жыл бұрын
Well there are differences pretty much everywhere
@GottesKrieger
@GottesKrieger 3 жыл бұрын
@@alessandraberetta6982 no there are physical differences only. All the other things should be exactly the same upbringing!
@gdetovosne
@gdetovosne 3 жыл бұрын
Am I the only one who caught the fact that the first girl LITERALLY said “I guess I forgot to tell my dad that I left” and she was in the 8th grade??? Excuse me, but that is grounds for concern when your daughter isn’t answering her phone, it’s 11pm, or 12am and you haven’t heard from her. To compare an 8th grader (A LITERAL MIDDLE SCHOOLER) to someone ie., her brother who she said was 17 at the time... Those aren’t the same things. Let’s say she had a sister who was 17, she’d probably have other privileges, BECAUSE OF HER AGE. There is also a HUGE difference in telling someone where you are, and how long you’re going to be out, and just sneaking out, or leaving without anyone knowing. Stupid stupid example she gave.
@sayidalinoor2512
@sayidalinoor2512 3 жыл бұрын
Straight facts
@r.e.c.9972
@r.e.c.9972 3 жыл бұрын
And then that same girl said that her and her father have great communication and she tells him everything????
@gdetovosne
@gdetovosne 3 жыл бұрын
@@r.e.c.9972 well I think you can still have a good relationship/good communication with someone and have occasional one off situations like this. It’s a father daughter dynamic, you aren’t going to tell him everything... right? lol. It just seems funny that she acknowledged that she may have forgotten to tell her father about leaving, but then fails to realize where his overreaction (in her opinion) comes from. And instead goes on to compare that situation to her brother, whose a lot older than her, without giving any context. As adults, 4 years isn’t a big deal, but 4 teen years, is a huuuuge difference.
@gaylordpantamime
@gaylordpantamime 3 жыл бұрын
Anyone else concerned about modern women it just seems like they lack so much...
@onetimeiateanindonesianguy6183
@onetimeiateanindonesianguy6183 3 жыл бұрын
@@gaylordpantamime yes. Onward.
@gracegriffith2809
@gracegriffith2809 3 жыл бұрын
The girl who said she has intense anxiety around her dad is definitely scared of her dad , the way she looks down when he’s disagreeing with her about how he thinks it’s crazy they don’t communicate
@lovezys1235
@lovezys1235 3 жыл бұрын
I'm the same way around my mom because I'm scared of her.
@amogus5632
@amogus5632 3 жыл бұрын
yo damn are you a satyr? You can see through people’s emotions through the interwebs. Wow so cool. Even though you’ve never met them??? Even cooler...
@user-ry6jj6kx2s
@user-ry6jj6kx2s 3 жыл бұрын
@@amogus5632 body language is a thing
@alexag.5008
@alexag.5008 3 жыл бұрын
@@amogus5632 there's a fucking thing called body language and movement, dumbass.
@NatureFreak1127
@NatureFreak1127 3 жыл бұрын
Yeah. It made me uncomfortable to see her like that. She is very low energy, quiet and withdrawn. I wonder what he did to her.
@molly8070
@molly8070 3 жыл бұрын
Growing up Caribbean I hate how I was taught vs how males in my family were raised. The women were expected to work, cook, clean and take care of the house and the males just sat around all day. Like all my aunts have businesses and good paying jobs and then my uncles were either free loading off other family members and getting into trouble and having multiple women and children. It created a dynamic to where me and my female cousins were so pressured and couldn’t go out or do anything. I remember I got slapped in public when I was 11 because my father thought I had a bf. My whole family was talking about me like I was a whore off of them just coming to a random conclusion. But if my male cousins bring a girl home everyone was okay with it. My female cousin was disowned at 18 when she brought her bf to meet her dad. Like there are differences between males or females but you gotta hold your kids to the same standard. Then you’re wondering why your daughters don’t wanna speak to you when they’re older 🤷🏾‍♀️
@brooklynforever1990
@brooklynforever1990 2 жыл бұрын
Yup I can testify 🙋🏽‍♀️
@_x_m_m_6976
@_x_m_m_6976 2 жыл бұрын
Oh God that sounds awful on quite a few levels. I completely realize you can never be 'complete' with a ruined childhood but at the very least I hope you people are independent now and have happy and successful lives
@ballershanelle
@ballershanelle 2 жыл бұрын
F that
@ilovesummer9750
@ilovesummer9750 2 жыл бұрын
Lol 😂 I’m Caribbean and in my family boys and girls cook and clean feel for you tho
@grey984
@grey984 2 жыл бұрын
I dont think thats a Caribbean thing girl Thats just just F'd up Also Ive heard of situations similar to this (but less extreme and F'd up) with genders reversed (main difference being males getting disregarded for refusing to break up with a girl the family didnt agree with, or not getting support after 18 cuz they should be able to work for their money and so the women can have what they need) So i agree with holding people to the same standard
@bubelaJC
@bubelaJC 3 жыл бұрын
“With immigrant parents you need to give them 7-10 business days to let them know where you’re going” 😂😂😂💯
@tikibaybee1
@tikibaybee1 3 жыл бұрын
Truer words never spoken 🤣🤣🤣
@kuroovibes2517
@kuroovibes2517 3 жыл бұрын
Factzzz. If we did what the 14 yr old did we'd not be seen on the face of the earth ahahah
@Eddy_-eh9xx
@Eddy_-eh9xx 3 жыл бұрын
😂😂omg true
@Oyinscorner
@Oyinscorner 3 жыл бұрын
Facts on facts
@shanice1549
@shanice1549 3 жыл бұрын
This is the best comment. Facts!!!!!
@En_Taro_Artanis
@En_Taro_Artanis 3 жыл бұрын
fathers tend to be more protective for who daughters bring home. They should also be protective of their sons too considering how the wrong girl can ruin your life.
@starzgirl72
@starzgirl72 3 жыл бұрын
Very true. Men, as well as women, need to be much more discerning about who they procreate with. Having a kid with the wrong person can easily forever change the trajectory of your life to where you never can really recover. It's sad and i've seen it way too many times.
@ghorstbusters6238
@ghorstbusters6238 3 жыл бұрын
It’s easier for men to deal with young men( there daughters bf) because they were a young man and can relate and know what a young man is like.
@Superbatmanbro
@Superbatmanbro 3 жыл бұрын
Men watch for red flags and red pills in your relationships
@ambiebby1636
@ambiebby1636 3 жыл бұрын
The mom usually watches out for the son. Women understand women and men understand men so we can see thru each other’s bs.
@user-cj6te2oj4m
@user-cj6te2oj4m 3 жыл бұрын
@@starzgirl72 Especially men
@duneeaaasha
@duneeaaasha Жыл бұрын
As a teenager I got roofied at a party, back then I didn’t even THINK of that risk. I feel like sometimes girls don’t understand that it’s a dangerous situation to be in and aren’t careful of that stuff. I almost died that night, and if it weren’t for an ex that found me and stepped up and beat the shit out of the asshole that did it, I woulda been raped too. It’s good that parents are overprotective of their daughters. Yeah you might not like it in the moment but they were right. I had other stories where my mom literally just got a bad feeling and sent my brother out to look for me and he was able to find me in the middle of a scary situation. If it weren’t for my mom being “overprotective” that night, I don’t know where I would be today.
@planettes
@planettes Жыл бұрын
🖤🖤🖤
@jkb1O5
@jkb1O5 Жыл бұрын
I’m in purely out of philosophical consideration to your ascribe situation and how you contextualized your capacity in regards to interacting with the world around you… You need to learn more stuff, point blank And if that’s something you’re in capable of then well special precautions need to be taken care of in how you move where you go what you do threat assessment potential etc.… And if you’re disabled regarding your cognitive ability to navigate situations in a way that you can do a thing inherently dangerous but through the way you move through the situation is how you safeguard and protect yourself and if that’s not a possibility then you need to seriously consider and figure out the types of engagements you are even able or should allow yourself to be part of
@carolinahernandez627
@carolinahernandez627 Жыл бұрын
But then you have to be overprotective of your son as well
@karsonvi679
@karsonvi679 Жыл бұрын
Yes exactly! They won’t realize u til they are in that situation sadly
@Johenz
@Johenz Жыл бұрын
@fredda1188 nahh gender does matter one thing y’all don’t factor in is we don’t live same experiences. your can’t be over protective with sons. Boys have to learn how to be tough because life of a man isn’t sunshine and rainbows. So when you’re raising a kid you have to raise them to be their potential gender experience. that’s why the over protection isn’t there. One day he’s gonna have a family, gonna have kids and a wife and everyone gonna depend on him especially to be emotionally strong. so he has to learn how to carry that burden that’s why parents give boys a little more freeway. He have to go through somethings (not rape of course) he have to go through hardship because the world wont be easy to him. If he’s crying for something small and another man see it they see him as weaker, if they see his parents cuddling him they hey see him as soft and if women see him that way too. So yeah you give your son more freeway so he can get smacked by the world. Daughters won’t get smacked by the world. Being young and innocent they might think they have the entire world figured out and that’s how you get you only fan superstars. You have a lot of old men praying on 14 year old grades offering them money
@slimkt
@slimkt 3 жыл бұрын
Personally, I think the problem is not that fathers are overprotective of their daughters, it’s that they should be just as protective of their sons. Predators go after little boys too. Also, it’d be really refreshing to see parents react to their sons the same way the father did to his daughter with anxiety when she was crying. Teach boys that it’s okay for them to express emotions or communicate their issues. Instead of the typical ‘suck it up’ attitude that leads to pent up rage in young men.
@yumiko0017
@yumiko0017 3 жыл бұрын
THIS!!!!!
@isaacalzate8262
@isaacalzate8262 3 жыл бұрын
Nah because thats weird for a LOT of people to see a bunch of emotional guys crying and shit like i see females do there is a REASON we have less estrogen than them and more testesterone
@kasmo_adRojo
@kasmo_adRojo 3 жыл бұрын
Naa I'm still telling my son to suck it up when I become a parent anyways, thank you for your opinion😂
@Nah-ah
@Nah-ah 2 жыл бұрын
@@isaacalzate8262 yeah we’d rather see boys shoot up schools, instead of talk about their feelings. Makes perfect sense! 😒
@RANDOM-pf1ve
@RANDOM-pf1ve 2 жыл бұрын
As a son I really don't feel like crying in most situations since I have to learn how to be stoic and reliable at the time of need, my father never said "boys don't cry" or something like that it's just something from inside, I don't like my crying face!
@ssjgoten202
@ssjgoten202 3 жыл бұрын
If my 14 year child came home male or female at midnight and wasnt answering their phone I'd be wildin.
@dubbcee1000
@dubbcee1000 3 жыл бұрын
I'd take away his X Station 180 for a week
@vianjelos
@vianjelos 3 жыл бұрын
Exactly. If her brother was 14 and did that the same would be done. A 17 year old is vastly different from a 14 year old and more so if he a boy. And even then MOST parents would be concerned. 14 is still a super vunerable age for both genders.
@chingchenghanjiyang9161
@chingchenghanjiyang9161 3 жыл бұрын
Use a belt on them.
@SuperMurray2009
@SuperMurray2009 3 жыл бұрын
@@dubbcee1000 I really hope that was a deliberate joke
@stalwartnerd
@stalwartnerd 3 жыл бұрын
@@SuperMurray2009 why do you think he called it an x station 180
@HC-gm4fo
@HC-gm4fo 3 жыл бұрын
“I’d never date him”- My wife 14 years ago
@mr.censored5.082
@mr.censored5.082 3 жыл бұрын
Lol
@PowerBuffBoys
@PowerBuffBoys 3 жыл бұрын
Well done🙌🏾
@johndavis9321
@johndavis9321 3 жыл бұрын
Well played sir
@oz_jones
@oz_jones 3 жыл бұрын
Nice
@thebluepineapplephoenix101
@thebluepineapplephoenix101 3 жыл бұрын
High quality man right here
@BlissfulMartini
@BlissfulMartini 2 жыл бұрын
The fact that she was even allowed to go out with her friends, presumably alone, at 14 is new to me. I couldn’t wear shorts at 14 😂. I can say that when I was a young, naïve, teenage girl I felt a lot of the same things they feel. Now at 28 i see where my parents were coming from. This won’t fully register with them until they’re older or have kids of their own.
@brooklynforever1990
@brooklynforever1990 2 жыл бұрын
Indeed I’m now thankfully for my mom’s diligence didn’t appreciate it at the time.
@user-zj6dp3ej2k
@user-zj6dp3ej2k 2 жыл бұрын
The shorts thing isn’t normal at all
@manasvisingh2101
@manasvisingh2101 2 жыл бұрын
The short thing isn't normal fam.
@onemillionpercent
@onemillionpercent 2 жыл бұрын
right!!! lmao same here w shorts, but it's my culture and religion. it's fine, i was saved from a lot of stupidity in my childhood yrs. i easily cringe at anything regarding the past, so it's helpful to have had less of that experience in general. i was a p smart kid, and the stupidity of kids in general and the push of completely free parenting just makes it difficult for me to look forward to parenting hehe
@user-zj6dp3ej2k
@user-zj6dp3ej2k 2 жыл бұрын
That’s not normal at all
@catiii4888
@catiii4888 3 жыл бұрын
I’m gonna go on a tangent but on the raising sons and daughters differently, I understand that you want to raise your daughter differently to keep her safe, I just think it’s important to include sons in that conversation. Usually those conversations with daughters happen away from the sons and later the boys are told “protect your sister” and that’s it. Through those conversations boys can learn self control first off. But also they can understand how women feel and not just focus on the fact that they need to be protected. They’re not an objects that you need to protect, they’re people. You should approach the women in your life with sincere concern to protect them not control them to protect them. Sometimes it comes off as control and a poor understanding from fathers, brothers, ect. This is about to get wordy but, better brothers lead to better fathers and the issues between fathers and daughters wont be so big.
@frenchtoastrazu6139
@frenchtoastrazu6139 3 жыл бұрын
This is such good advice, perfect.
@AnnaHans88
@AnnaHans88 3 жыл бұрын
This exactly
@user-us7py1cy2k
@user-us7py1cy2k 3 жыл бұрын
Exactly
@Aeruthus
@Aeruthus 3 жыл бұрын
It's also important because boys can be victims too and should be taught what to look out for and how to protect themselves. Everyone should be talked to about how to protect themselves.
@fearthemerciful
@fearthemerciful 3 жыл бұрын
This is naive. You want boys to understand how girls feel? You want fathers to protect without exercising their authority? You think boys instinctually protect women because they see them as mere "objects"? You think boys will learn "self control" (whatever that means) by listening in on a conversation that is irrelevant to their life? All of what you said sounds good to someone who doesn't know better. In reality, you're just adding in more unnecessary noise to an already difficult problem. All of my sisters were raised differently by my parents because there were active predators both in the interpersonal and public environments. I didn't get sexually assaulted, raped, stalked or harassed like my sisters did. I also did not see any of my sisters as objects when I protected them. Y'all are so obsessed with "muh equality" and "let me live life without any rules or consequences" that you're empowering the predators. Instead of living without taking responsibility, maybe realize that men and women are different, therefore they need different parenting.
@EddZone
@EddZone 3 жыл бұрын
Society needs to EMBRACE the Differences between Men and Women rather than trying to ERASE the Differences between Us.
@bustonjoyall1941
@bustonjoyall1941 3 жыл бұрын
Studys have shown that In countrys were they try to erase the differences between men and women it actually has the opposite affect were after a few years gender roles start to become more mainstream lol kinda ironic
@SuperMurray2009
@SuperMurray2009 3 жыл бұрын
@@bustonjoyall1941 Probably less double standards there
@mimimosa259
@mimimosa259 3 жыл бұрын
Totally agree
@DigitalPand3mic
@DigitalPand3mic 3 жыл бұрын
@@bustonjoyall1941 Already happening with gen z apparently, and im glad.
@kingsargonii6939
@kingsargonii6939 3 жыл бұрын
Being a man is damn near illegal in the western world.
@mizzb32ful
@mizzb32ful 3 жыл бұрын
My dad let my brother run around high school doing what he wanted because hes a boy. He ended up getting two girls pregnant. Careful what you allow.
@KhalidAli-jc7cv
@KhalidAli-jc7cv 3 жыл бұрын
Isn't that a good thing
@imjustsayin34
@imjustsayin34 3 жыл бұрын
@@KhalidAli-jc7cv 18 years 18 years she got one of yo kids got you for 18 years
@KhalidAli-jc7cv
@KhalidAli-jc7cv 3 жыл бұрын
It doesn't say 18 years
@OutlandishSamurai
@OutlandishSamurai 3 жыл бұрын
Still better than my daughter getting pregnant by 2 different men.
@geraldineortiz6939
@geraldineortiz6939 3 жыл бұрын
@@OutlandishSamurai How it's just as bad.
@Tuepfely
@Tuepfely 2 жыл бұрын
I feel like your parents sharing their struggles with you when they are older and not always playing the strong / unbreakable person is actually really helpful. When my dad shared his struggles with me, I respected him even more. When I faced problems in similar situations, I can always relate to him and get comfort in the fact that someone who lived his life sucessfully also had struggles with XYZ as well. When everyone plays strong around you, your own mistakes can feel more devastating.
@octopus4925
@octopus4925 Жыл бұрын
I wholeheartedly agree with this!! It makes them feel human and relatable and gives you an example of how an adult should really be and feel. This is so important
@madalinapreda8206
@madalinapreda8206 3 жыл бұрын
“But if my 17 yo brother did it” well yes I agree. However, there’s the age difference. You were 13-14, he was 17. Of course u’re gonna call the cops for a 13 yo regardless of their gender.
@BreMue
@BreMue 2 жыл бұрын
Right, like it's a whole different scenario, not even about gender at that point
@ALMK28-
@ALMK28- 3 жыл бұрын
Imagine being bitter about your parents being concerned that they’ve not had contact with you all day up until midnight as a 14 year old kid 😂 peak foolishness
@chajang7292
@chajang7292 3 жыл бұрын
People don't know how good they got it until they've experienced true parental neglect. That'll hurt more.
@iwanttobeapopstar008
@iwanttobeapopstar008 3 жыл бұрын
I think that says a lot about how mature the person is.
@guyincognito1406
@guyincognito1406 3 жыл бұрын
That’s where I was at, there’s a bit of a difference between the 17 yr old and the 14 yr old wanting to stay out all night.
@rupertholmes5828
@rupertholmes5828 3 жыл бұрын
@@chajang7292 that's hard core truth
@scaratlas3347
@scaratlas3347 3 жыл бұрын
14 and staying out that long?!?!
@pikapikanuuu7262
@pikapikanuuu7262 3 жыл бұрын
I think parent's should be protective over their boy's as well especially since I feel like pedophiles don't just go after little girl's.
@localjunckieasmr9207
@localjunckieasmr9207 3 жыл бұрын
EXACTLY!!!
@TSH425
@TSH425 3 жыл бұрын
Yh they dont because they know they will be protected while the male is vulnerable because no one one's taught him safety
@tunjilegba
@tunjilegba 3 жыл бұрын
Gangs are the bigger groomers far more like have your child killed or imprisoned
@annwolf2127
@annwolf2127 3 жыл бұрын
Exactly!! That's the problem too many people believe only girls get molested & if your a dude There's no way in hell that would happen because your a "man" & you should be able to defend yourself -__- So many boys or guys keep quiet because of this reason.
@Ohne_Silikone
@Ohne_Silikone 3 жыл бұрын
@@annwolf2127 just like you said, this problem is so much under reported, if it is recognised at all, also by the victims themselves. Molested boys often have a lot of self blame because they often deal with feelings and obvious signs of arousal against their will. I will not say this isn’t a known problem for molested girls as well, but what I understood is that for boys it happens quite often. This arousal can give victims the false idea they secretly liked or wanted it to happen and that the hurt they experience was their own fault. It is sometimes used by perpetrators to convince the molested child he/she welcomed the molestation, which is again false of course. Furthermore because boys are often told to be strong and that they need to defend themselves, they feel they have failed in those aspects as well. Best not show your weakness to the world, and whatever you do, don’t cry about it, control it, keep it together. Many boys simply don’t tell. I have had quite some contact with male victims and these things keep popping up in their stories.
@Alexis_005
@Alexis_005 3 жыл бұрын
My brother who is younger than me had it 100 times easier than me and my sister. he was allowed to go out and come to the house at any time. I was not allowed to date or be home later than 10:00 pm I was already 21!!!. Yet he brought his first girlfriend to live with my parents at 18!!! When I confronted my dad about his hypocrisy he straight up told me. Let his girlfriend’s dad worry about his daughter. The double standard
@eventplanner461
@eventplanner461 3 жыл бұрын
Your dad should be worried because it's him that will have to pay child support should something happen.
@yumiko0017
@yumiko0017 3 жыл бұрын
That’s some chauvinistic shit. I can’t stand that. So let me guess, if he got her pregnant when he was 18, it’ll be the girls problem and not his sons/your brother? That’s an idiotic attitude. I bet you’re probably more mature than your brother.
@theannouncer3423
@theannouncer3423 3 жыл бұрын
@@yumiko0017 You sound immature
@AkshayKumar-ue1fp
@AkshayKumar-ue1fp 3 жыл бұрын
@@yumiko0017 ofc it's the girl problem..men can't get pregnant
@mitsyrage2233
@mitsyrage2233 2 жыл бұрын
Just leave. You're in someone's house. I abide by my mom's rules. If I can't stand for it I'll just leave.
@twot2224
@twot2224 Жыл бұрын
preach's point about how, what parents might think of as encouragement can easily just be pressure is so true. all of my siblings and me growing up were constantly told how smart for our age we were and it just fucks with your sense of ambition or drive or work ethic. you're told you are something and then as soon as you run into any sort of difficulty suddenly you're not just trying to live up to this little test at school but this whole ass picture of yourself people have made for you. you just want to give up and it fucks your self-worth lmao. though honestly i feel like it's near impossible to be a parent and not fuck up your kid a little bit like this. it's so easy to do i think it's almost unavoidable.
@marvellkrypton
@marvellkrypton 3 жыл бұрын
"Parents job is to assume the worst" -Preach Wise words my man
@tamtam9034
@tamtam9034 3 жыл бұрын
Yep
@dumdumballoon
@dumdumballoon 3 жыл бұрын
@Franca Wong he only mentioned calling the cops when that 14 year old girl was missing until MIDNIGHT. When I was 14 I wouldn't conceive of remotely doing something like that. Why? Because the cops wouldn't be there to search for me, they'd be there to keep my parents from killing me..
@ac2395
@ac2395 3 жыл бұрын
@Franca Wong I got the rape doctor ie regular doctor on speed dial.
@danielsemakula1526
@danielsemakula1526 3 жыл бұрын
@@dumdumballoon eyo man if I was out even until 9:00? man I would certainly be dead. A nigga would never see the light of day ever again.
@10PKOR24
@10PKOR24 3 жыл бұрын
Assuming the worst is just doomed to fail. That;'s how you get ultra strict parents that give no freedom to kids and they have to escape the house in order to have a simple day at the beach or the movies.
@jeanettejbeauty6374
@jeanettejbeauty6374 3 жыл бұрын
Yes, boys and girls should be raised differently. They’re obviously different and I think girls are more protected. I have three boys and a girl by the way.
@idi.h5460
@idi.h5460 3 жыл бұрын
Unrelated lol but You’re stunning sis 🔥🔥🔥
@Chunz_Lo
@Chunz_Lo 3 жыл бұрын
@JeanetteJBeauty I love your channel, so I love when I see you comment under videos on channels I watch 😂
@justchilling704
@justchilling704 3 жыл бұрын
Spot on. We are different and have different needs.
@randylahey5463
@randylahey5463 3 жыл бұрын
That's called logical and proper parenting. Good work, ma'am
@nickc3250
@nickc3250 3 жыл бұрын
Well said
@kt-fz3tk
@kt-fz3tk 3 жыл бұрын
“7-10 business days.” 😭😭 the accuracy hurts.
@louera
@louera 3 жыл бұрын
I have a mom who does the whole "I love you unconditionally and accept you as you are" shebang, but literally ignores me or treats me like shit if I don't do exactly as she tells me to. It's is all well and good to say that, Ben, but actually SHOW IT instead of just preaching it. Your daughter's body language was exactly like mine when I used to be close to my mom-- a lot of anxiety and timidness. She's also wondering why I've become distant from her when we used to be so close. Whenever I would voice out my feelings, it would the whole "nothing you do could disappoint me" spiel, so that I would start feeling guilty about seeing fault with this parent who SAYS nice things, but does the complete opposite. I later learned something called covert narcissism: people who look so charming on the outside but are actually hideous behind closed doors. I'm glad Citcali is moving in with her mother
@paulcarmi8130
@paulcarmi8130 Жыл бұрын
That’s how my mom is, the unconditional love shpeel is a guilt trip, it’s why I rarely speak to her or text her or anything.
@celestialmorpho
@celestialmorpho 3 жыл бұрын
Is it that hard to say that we can raise our sons and daughters differently but treat them the same? The world around them won’t change just because of their “woke” upbringing.
@celestialmorpho
@celestialmorpho 3 жыл бұрын
@Edrick Powell you can give the same amount of respect and love to two people even though those two people may need different things. Their needs are different but as long as I give the same amount of time and energy to both equally then that is treating them the same. I’m not talking about absolute specifics. Like if my daughter starts her period that doesn’t mean I have to start teaching my son how to use tampons too.
@tyctonic5936
@tyctonic5936 3 жыл бұрын
@@celestialmorpho i agree
@richardhobbs7360
@richardhobbs7360 3 жыл бұрын
@Edrick Powell i can treat them the same whilst also making sure i bring up my daughter knowing that she has to be always vigilant and to go out with a guy or a group of friends, something you dont have to do with sons
@sakshamtyagi7347
@sakshamtyagi7347 3 жыл бұрын
@@celestialmorpho but I guess we have to teach boys and girls equally on the topic of sexuality and stuff like periods.
@HateIsJustice
@HateIsJustice 3 жыл бұрын
@@richardhobbs7360 Please don't neglect teaching your sons that same kind of vigilance or that it's fine to ask for company if they have to go out somewhere in the middle of the night. That they're not weak for being afraid or scared of something happening. Make sure they don't get into bad stuff that's gonna get them jumped, stabbed, killed or mess up their lives and that they're not risking that if they don't need to. 4:43
@aweshumandy
@aweshumandy 3 жыл бұрын
There's a difference between being treated differently and treated fairly. Just be fair, it'll always be different.
@dark3rthanshadows
@dark3rthanshadows 3 жыл бұрын
true words, i feel like people mix both words.
@Demonsouls1993
@Demonsouls1993 3 жыл бұрын
And the issue with that is daughters will never understand that till they have a daughter of their own and then something happens to them and by then its to late to see how wrong they are that they think they where treated unfair
@igipop14
@igipop14 3 жыл бұрын
Even though I understand that is a noble sentiment, I think it is wrong and here is why: fair is a subjective term. What is fair to you, may not be fair to me. It could be based on cultural differences, or gender (which brings us back to the initial question of the video) or anything we hold dear in life. For example, the 14 year old girl felt she was being treated unfairly because her 17 year old brother had more freedom than her and she couldn't understand why. Hence she was treated differently. It is all a perception of the individual that decides what is fair and what is not. Therefore it is subjective. It is a philosophical term and anything philosophical is not clear cut. Also the very definition of "fair" means to be equal and therefore cannot be different, which makes your statement an oxymoron.
@aweshumandy
@aweshumandy 3 жыл бұрын
@@igipop14 equatible is not equal. equity is not equality. Fairness aligns more with equity than it does equality. While it is true that someone may not consider something fair, the person applying fairness can abide by it as best as possible. Fair was Preach's father not rejecting his daughter's ability to go out but putting the qualifier that she needs to go with someone he trusts (i.e. his son). Something unfair would be to say that Preach is able to go out on his own AND could also stay out past curfew unlike the daughter. While "fair" is subjective, so is nearly everything in society. Just because it isn't as objective as the sky is blue (on a clear day during a certain time) and the grass is green (as long as it has been watered frequently but not too much and provided enough sunlight) doesn't mean we need to not have a baseline. See everything has nuance even "the sky is blue and the grass is green" and we can determine something within reason. Reason is something we've determined to be a barometer of the perception of reality for our society. Something is reasonable if the large amount of people in a society would determine something that is perceived to "go in that direction". Fairness is applying reason to a situation to determine, or rather attempt, the most equitable outcome. What is fair or our reasoning is and has been shaped by society, that is why something fair centuries ago could be considered unfair today.
@daniellemurray8914
@daniellemurray8914 3 жыл бұрын
THIS! boys and girls should be raised differently because every child's needs are different
@alwayschasingjesus3452
@alwayschasingjesus3452 2 жыл бұрын
As a parent, it is not your job to “match your child’s energy”. Your an adult, they are a child. You should be more mature than them and able to control and navigate your emotions better.
@endm_
@endm_ 3 жыл бұрын
From a women’s perspective, it’s difficult to form relationships and friendships with other men because of this difference in how your parents view you, it’s frustrating. I get fathers and mother’s will be more over protective of their daughters, but instead of limiting them by taking away the ability to be independent out of fear, they should instead teach their daughters to be safer and aware of the dangers so they can have the same opportunities that men do. A woman shouldn’t feel unable to do things, just more prepared for the worst.
@caramelgodess1813
@caramelgodess1813 3 жыл бұрын
Yes! This right here!
@undead_6662
@undead_6662 3 жыл бұрын
I'll add that if you have a male sibling(s) they should join in on the conversation and vise versa... This not only does help you prepare for the worst but also ever slightly decreases that possibility of that "worst" situation occurring.
@d.mcfadden7343
@d.mcfadden7343 2 жыл бұрын
Yeah no father's don't 'limit' daughters we do teach them about the dangers out there
@endm_
@endm_ 2 жыл бұрын
@D. McFadden just because you don’t experience it/do it, doesn’t mean it never happens. That’s like saying racism doesn’t exist just because you’ve never experienced racism.
@d.mcfadden7343
@d.mcfadden7343 2 жыл бұрын
@@endm_ that is a ridiculous argument you don't know how fathers generally are plus everyone knows that mothers are more protective of sons than daughters that's a fact. Secondly, we don't hide anything when it comes to what guys are like so we teach them all the things they need to know so they are better equipped for dealing with them
@Philybeef
@Philybeef 3 жыл бұрын
The difference isn't just sons and daughters, each child has their own unique personalities that require different parenting approaches. One kid is shy, the other outgoing, one has behavior problems, the other is the "golden" child. At the same time they could be doing really well or not doing well at all in school in terms of grades, friends, etc. A parent's job is to encourage and nurture the positive aspects of their children while helping them improve on the more negative aspects as much as possible. To answer the question? Yes, sons and daughters require different attention that has to do with their specific gender, to try and ignore that is going to hinder them rather than help them later in life.
@mrsister5955
@mrsister5955 3 жыл бұрын
Well said. Having three children with vastly different personalities, I couldn't agree more.
@Anonymous-m3y
@Anonymous-m3y 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you.‼️
@GottesKrieger
@GottesKrieger 3 жыл бұрын
I was labeled a child with behavior problems at a very young age. Turns out I have Tourette’s syndrome. So you should be careful labeling children in such ways. The reason I say this is because, if the child hears this bad labeling from somebody who is there to be a role model, then they may actually believe this label is true and it can have dire consequences later on down the line.
@Somethingwithletters64
@Somethingwithletters64 3 жыл бұрын
Man thank you! I wanted for them to realise that through the entire video. I get worried we're going to do kids a great disservice by thinking if we raise them the same it's going to be better. Like if you raise a kid that is very confident and dominant with a "take what they need" personality by saying that the world is theirs and they're perfect, you're going to create a monster. They need discipline to control that and use it positively. And if it's someone who just wants to make everyone around them happy and is super altruistic and agreable they might need to hear that sort of "the world is yours, grab what you need" stuff because they probably have to learn to look out for number one. If they get schooled like the dominant/confident person they're going to completely forget about themselves and be miserable. As you said, people are different, different people need different things. It makes me glad to hear that this was something that other people thought as well because I think it's important for the future. Hope you have a great day my dude!
@snapeinvader6208
@snapeinvader6208 3 жыл бұрын
@@Somethingwithletters64 Great comment Elliott! Really insightful!
@NaturallyLit
@NaturallyLit 3 жыл бұрын
Fathers are more protective because they know how wild men can get. That's where men have to hold other men accountable.
@thorodinson5201
@thorodinson5201 3 жыл бұрын
Same with Woman
@Gunnerb52
@Gunnerb52 3 жыл бұрын
Oh I would hold men or women accountable if they did something to my daughter and my sons. I would be doing some accounting of body parts. 1 little 2 little 3 little fingers, 4 little 5 little 6 little fingers, 7 little 8 little 9 little fingers, 10 little fingers gone. :)
@tormentorchick1755
@tormentorchick1755 3 жыл бұрын
Then they should raise their sons NOT to be that way. Why let them do it, or even encourage it, when you know that you're going to defend your daughter against the same exact thing? It's crazy.
@erenjeager5290
@erenjeager5290 3 жыл бұрын
@@tormentorchick1755 right, but I can’t control other people and what they do so I need to make sure that MY people have what they need no matter what it is right? So if a guy is trying to touch me then I’m just ending him on the spot, but if someone is touching a girl other men must step in and she must be prepared or knowing the signs so she can avoid it if possible like Krav Maga fighting or mace spray
@bornfree8073
@bornfree8073 3 жыл бұрын
@@erenjeager5290 r u a girl? U must be. A parent can't raise a man to be different. Go to ever male feminist and they will secretly wanting poom poom. Go to a conservative guy it is the same thing. It's genetics. Each guy handles them differently. No man raises his son to be a rapist. All men know rape is wrong. You get into a crowd with everyone hollering and getting crazy and a chick stripping in the middle, she is gonna get grouped. You literally lose your mind.
@CharlieMikeNS
@CharlieMikeNS 3 жыл бұрын
2:38 - Surprised y'all didn't bring up the age difference as well. There's a big difference in maturity between a 14-year-old and a 17-year-old.
@aliyamichelle3353
@aliyamichelle3353 3 жыл бұрын
I love how confident Aba is in his opinions and ideas. He states his thoughts and then let’s YOU get comfortable with it. In contrast Preach braces you for his ideas and then coddles you after to make sure you understand why he feels the way he does. Lol I love it 🖤
@taiahunter2600
@taiahunter2600 3 жыл бұрын
Ok for the girl who said “my brother is 17, I’m 14” well part of the reason the parent doesn’t care as much the brother is out till midnight is probably also because he’s almost an adult. A 14 year old has less awareness than a 17 year old as well
@thoticcusprime9309
@thoticcusprime9309 3 жыл бұрын
thats not true for every 14 yr old. people are too stupid to comprehend this
@bigdog3695
@bigdog3695 3 жыл бұрын
@@thoticcusprime9309 It relatively is though
@thatoneguyricardo
@thatoneguyricardo 3 жыл бұрын
And also if two of them are together that’s safety in numbers plus she wasn’t answering her phone, she’s just a bad child most likely and when she gets caught goes “oh cause I’m a girl”
@taiahunter2600
@taiahunter2600 3 жыл бұрын
@@thoticcusprime9309 I understand that. But on average they aren’t as aware. There is a development gap. Hell I’ve seen 14 year olds, I’ve been 14. There is not as much awareness or maturity in general, just because I don’t say in general doesn’t mean I’m talking about every single one. And in this case, she’s kinda unaware because she’s complaining about her parents worrying about her and not her 17 year old brother.
@Dr.Frankensteen
@Dr.Frankensteen 3 жыл бұрын
@@thoticcusprime9309 It's generally true though. Not 100% of the time obviously. In this case in the video, she didn't even tell him she left.
@johnserosanguineous1886
@johnserosanguineous1886 3 жыл бұрын
Theres a fine line between "my son can handle himself" and "my son is disposable." As well as "my daughter is fragile" and "my daughter is an idiot."
@LukaDonesnitch
@LukaDonesnitch 3 жыл бұрын
Wha!? Fine lines don’t exist. Either, you are apart of the sexist patriarchy or not. (Sarcasm warning for any triggered dimwit who thinks I’m being serious)🙄
@jayc342009
@jayc342009 3 жыл бұрын
We men are disposable though, humans have a group preference greatly in favour of women. It's the harsh truth.
@kuroovibes2517
@kuroovibes2517 3 жыл бұрын
@@LukaDonesnitch had me in the first half haha....
@breakingthemasks
@breakingthemasks 3 жыл бұрын
Fricking nailed it brother.
@kuroovibes2517
@kuroovibes2517 3 жыл бұрын
@@jayc342009 That's very true. Women are always getting special attention. They can talk about their feelings to anyone without being scared. As men its harder for us and this new wave of feminism has made things worse. Higher suicide rates and decreasing marriage counts (in 1st world countries).
@briand5866
@briand5866 3 жыл бұрын
Mom I want key and peele. Mom: We have key and peele at home Key and peele at home:
@The_ScapeGoat
@The_ScapeGoat 2 жыл бұрын
Only these guys are talented
@BlackDiamond2718
@BlackDiamond2718 5 ай бұрын
Dude that is beautiful. 😂❤
@EliteWhiteNinja
@EliteWhiteNinja 3 жыл бұрын
As a son, the way fathers tried to hide feelings away from their kids really resonated. The kids learned to do the same thing towards fathers, but against the father's will. I think that's why it's important to be both strong AND vulnerable (have both masculine and femenine qualities), and why context matters so much.
@The_ScapeGoat
@The_ScapeGoat 2 жыл бұрын
Men and women are different. It's okay for men to be manly and women to be womanly, so long as they're all being responsible adults. We don't raise children, we raise future adults.
@darkwriter_xx94
@darkwriter_xx94 3 жыл бұрын
There’s a difference between raising a kid differently and raising kids unfairly. And for some parents, they mix up the two. If you require one kid to clean then require all kids. If you require one kid to do well in school, require all kids to do so. Also, I think dads should be MORE protective of their sons because little boys are also targeted.
@danielsemakula1526
@danielsemakula1526 3 жыл бұрын
Thank u for ur amazing analogy
@danielsemakula1526
@danielsemakula1526 3 жыл бұрын
@@MsMaryPatricia I agree with hosw just making them do housework makes no sense. Ur supposed to be treating differently not unfairly
@danielsemakula1526
@danielsemakula1526 3 жыл бұрын
@Disguised Dv8ant yeah people be acting like young boys are always the perpetrator never the victim
@musicsbricabrac7195
@musicsbricabrac7195 3 жыл бұрын
@@MsMaryPatricia People use their strenght. Physicial weak men will adapt and use manipulation and not physical strenght to attack other or protect themselfs. Strong women will use their muscle to attack other or protect themselfs. You can see the same thing with disabled people, they adapt how to protect themselfs or/and attack others. The first error you see with "newbie" where am i is to think that physical disadvantage people can't adapt or use other stuff to be strong. One of the worst default of humankind is his visual biasis
@musicsbricabrac7195
@musicsbricabrac7195 3 жыл бұрын
@@danielsemakula1526 Nowaday everywhere, most everyday you see how horrible is to be a women, all the pain they fell, all the pressure. So parents know more how to protect their daughter But for boy, you have nothing except the random " harassment" for eveyrthing, is like we don't need to protect them cause by their sex, they have obligatory everything, all advantage, they can't have , more or less, the same type of problem a duaght can have. You can see new parents to start ignore their child cause " it' s a boy" , here in some college you can see boys who hate themself cause they are a male.
@DaezdnK
@DaezdnK 3 жыл бұрын
At the end of the day if you have a daughter she's going to do things. Teach her the game and teach her to be safe
@xychelz
@xychelz 3 жыл бұрын
@LowLinK this has nothing to do with being liberal tf 😭
@elijahgavin6706
@elijahgavin6706 3 жыл бұрын
I’m so progressive I turned my own daughter out 😈 skreet talk
@dzimm-mq3tw
@dzimm-mq3tw 3 жыл бұрын
@@xychelz u must be a liberal or something😭😭
@DaezdnK
@DaezdnK 3 жыл бұрын
@LowLinK I mean you have to protect your sons too
@xychelz
@xychelz 3 жыл бұрын
@@dzimm-mq3tw I ain’t even liberal lmao or conservative I could honestly care less but this literally has nothing to do with politics. I have conservative neighbors and they let their kids do whatever they want and honestly they’re never there for their kids 🤷‍♀️
@valeriecarpentier9367
@valeriecarpentier9367 3 жыл бұрын
I’m glad my parents did not educate me to “be pretty and shut up”. They raised me to work on my talents, put myself out there and rewarded my achievements. It’s a lot of pressure, tho. And now I’m growing up and realizing how it shaped my sense of self. Like my only value was my achievements. They also lowkey shamed my sisters and I when we put on makeup and tried to be pretty. Which ironically backfired as me in my early 20’s wanting the approval of men even more cause I had repressed this part of me when it was time to explore it (my teens). It’s important to teach women to embrace their femininity, have good role models and for dads not to be affraid... be there for guidance and recognize they cannot shelter their daughters forever.
@amrithak9875
@amrithak9875 3 жыл бұрын
yesss...i totally agree...im in my early 20's right now and i feel so bad for not embracing my feminine side sooner...we shud learn to embrace our differences as men and women instead of trying to erase them....FEMININITY IS NOT WEAK
@SneakerBiscut
@SneakerBiscut 2 жыл бұрын
They should be raised differently. My daughter: stay in a group, keep your drink covered, people(not just men) will try to rape you. Be safe. My son: stay in a group, keep your drink covered, know where the security cameras are incase someone tries to lie about rape. And keep your damn GoPro on! Your little crush Will NOT be your witness in court! Understand? Be safe.
@velvetvulpix
@velvetvulpix 9 ай бұрын
No it’s not people it’s men if your telling your daughter she has to treat women like men your doing her a disservice I’m a girl men have bothered me my whole life starting in first grade it just gets much much worse in sixth grade me and all my friends constantly got hit on in the bus going back n forth to school it was ALWAYS men trying to get our phone numbers get us in their cars following us home grabbing us never women I remember in ninth grade this guy stared at me the entire way to school on the bus like he was mad like furious I finally got off the bus I turned around and he was fucking licking the window So no your theory isn’t accurate it’s just not It’s not anecdotal if it’s every girl and woman you know who has dozens and dozens of stories that a pattern it’s a fact
@K_M.G
@K_M.G 3 ай бұрын
@Allah_Loves_Forgives_and_Saves The changes of that happening is far less common. Go look at the statistics and quite pretending that the numbers are even close.
@OFM1209
@OFM1209 3 жыл бұрын
Fathers don’t like guys hanging around their daughters because they used to be those guys and they know how they think.
@Ash_Wen-li
@Ash_Wen-li 3 жыл бұрын
Or they know how their friends used to think
@Tarumarugan
@Tarumarugan 3 жыл бұрын
You don’t have to have been an asshole to know how they think and be careful.
@SuperMurray2009
@SuperMurray2009 3 жыл бұрын
Yeah like let's not spread the idea the most guys were players back in their heyday (despite what so many will tell you). Most guys back then are the same ones you got now. The overwhelming majority doing a whole lot of chasing and not getting laid and a very small amount having sex with most of the girls in school. I just think fathers knew that once they found that small minority that did have alot of sex it was only a matter if time before their daughter is involved.
@johnmivule-novabow8143
@johnmivule-novabow8143 3 жыл бұрын
Facts brudda
@educationalporpoises9592
@educationalporpoises9592 3 жыл бұрын
@@SuperMurray2009 I think a lot of guys are aware of their utter id and what they want to do, and they know that they have to guard themselves against what they might want.
@angelabarazzone7899
@angelabarazzone7899 3 жыл бұрын
14 yr old girl is a lot different than a 17 year old boy, hell a 14 yr old girl is different than a 17 yr old girl.
@stina263
@stina263 3 жыл бұрын
Fr
@iamjoelle1556
@iamjoelle1556 3 жыл бұрын
Im thinking maybe the son did the same when he was her age and father probably reacted similar even when she was older. Bcuz that makes it not about age and more about gender.
@titto2602
@titto2602 3 жыл бұрын
That mindset she had was childish, I mean there are clearly the difference's on gender but then if I am 15 and my brother is 17 I totally get why he can stay till midnight. And she was just 14 like bruh
@mohammedal-rawi3420
@mohammedal-rawi3420 3 жыл бұрын
Fr a 17 year old boy and a 14 year old girl aren't even comparable by that point why us she complaining
@princekiki33
@princekiki33 Жыл бұрын
Most dads aren't going to admit it but they're really protecting their daughters from themselves
@Ghost40000
@Ghost40000 Жыл бұрын
This sounds so stupid🤣
@wakadaemon7191
@wakadaemon7191 Жыл бұрын
@@Ghost40000 it be true thou
@-irumean-3919
@-irumean-3919 Жыл бұрын
Wdym by this??
@wakadaemon7191
@wakadaemon7191 Жыл бұрын
@@-irumean-3919 I assume he means trying to protect the daughters from themselves (the daughters self) HOPEFULLY, I hope he doesn't mean themselves as in the fathers
@joshuanoriega5680
@joshuanoriega5680 Жыл бұрын
​@-irumean-3919 It means they were doing the same things to girls that they're afraid of happening to their daughters. My wife's friend found out she was pregnant with a girl and her husband was immediately upset. When she asked him why he said "because of all the stuff I used to do to girls when I was young. I don't want anyone doing that to her".
@blueboi12jj
@blueboi12jj 2 жыл бұрын
Being a Dad, this was very refreshing for me. Especially since my kids are still toddlers and one is a boy and the other a girl. It encouraged me in a sense because I share the same sentiment about girls being raised differently than boys but I was to make sure I reinforce the same values in them both. Explaining to my daughter on how to be careful when it comes the her male counterparts but at the same time showing my son how to not only have respect for himself and women as well. Its like killing two birds with one stone. Sending a strong aware citizen out in the world from both genders and them hopefully adding something meaningful and positive to society.
@jazzyavu
@jazzyavu 3 жыл бұрын
GUILTY. My husband was my friend growing up. I remembered telling people that it is impossible for us to be romantic involve. We've been married for 10 yrs.
@woozihae
@woozihae 3 жыл бұрын
:'))
@josephortega6080
@josephortega6080 3 жыл бұрын
I personally have a lot of friends (best friends) who are girls and as I grow up to my late teenage years this is my worst fear
@NewAgeSlaves
@NewAgeSlaves 3 жыл бұрын
Familiarly breeds attraction the farther isn't wrong for assuming something to happen its natural
@NewAgeSlaves
@NewAgeSlaves 3 жыл бұрын
@pebzee do you have anything to refute that with or you just bored replying with nonsense?
@aseelrefai7442
@aseelrefai7442 3 жыл бұрын
But that’s good you were free to explore that relationship and it lead to a long-standing marriage.
@Jahani31
@Jahani31 3 жыл бұрын
Safety wise, I can definitely see being more protective of daughters. My only issue is when people don't expect the same for boys and girls when it comes to grades, household chores, and cooking. I do not believe that there should be differences in those instances. I also feel that parents should be just as tough about sexual education and contraception for both boys and girls.
@BM-fz9yc
@BM-fz9yc 3 жыл бұрын
Agreed
@KR-vu9mo
@KR-vu9mo 3 жыл бұрын
I completely agree with your last point. The sexual double standards between boys and girls is truly baffling
@educationalporpoises9592
@educationalporpoises9592 3 жыл бұрын
I agree with this, pretty much. I don't think the chores have to be the same necessarily, but the distribution at least. Idk, I've seen probably one woman mow the lawn in my life so it's arbitrarily embedded in me to see lawn mowing as a guy thing, lol
@crazybruno3850
@crazybruno3850 3 жыл бұрын
Well your last point my parents were pretty tough on the sexeducation and I’m a guy
@Gingersnaps_the_pumpkin_kitty
@Gingersnaps_the_pumpkin_kitty 3 жыл бұрын
@@KR-vu9mo yeah, especially since your son's can definitely out do your daughter in the teen pregnancy categories. I know 3 chicks who had the SAME baby daddy around the SAME time and he had to pay child support IN HIGHSCHOOL because of it, which means his parents were LITERALLY paying for that mistake. That's expensive.
@mufflzmufflz2107
@mufflzmufflz2107 2 жыл бұрын
I feel like I need to say something about the father crying in front of their kid when his father past away. When my dad went through losing his father it was the first and only time I have watched him cry that I can remember, but it didn't feel like he lost his ability to be a rock. It showed me that even when your rock has its hard times it becomes okay to allow them to take a break and become "human" again. Even though they are normally this pillar of strength, they just lost their pillar and might need a little support themselves. I don't know the perspective from a daughters point, but for me it just made me realize how great he was to be strong for so long.
@catherinesfakeemail727
@catherinesfakeemail727 3 жыл бұрын
I understand the dynamic of dads not wanting to open up so that they don’t tarnish their “protector” image, but i still feel like it’s important to be able to open up to some extent and show a more humane side once in a while in order to build a stronger connection. Ive only seen my dad grieve or open up about something twice when he lost family members, those were the times when i felt the most connected to him but it didn’t ever make me see my dad as less of a protector.
@Kingofthenet2
@Kingofthenet2 Жыл бұрын
This is beautifully said 🙌🏽
@sibusiso2841
@sibusiso2841 3 жыл бұрын
The misogyny argument is basically like, "raise your kids to be gay so they don't become homophobic". Not being raised the same way as a woman doesnt make men misogynist, being raised without respect for all people, woman included does
@christophercombs7561
@christophercombs7561 3 жыл бұрын
Misogyny is vastly over used as to be almost meaningless and no one talks about misandry
@ousmanecamara8606
@ousmanecamara8606 3 жыл бұрын
thank you!
@Hypknoh1
@Hypknoh1 3 жыл бұрын
HYPKNOH DIGITAL 1 second ago woman are exploiting the fact they suffer little to no consequences for their actions and using what men say and do against them knowing they suffer severe consequences... a man will back down to a woman (knowing deep down inside he could end her in an instant) purely because of consequence. if woman really want equal rights then it only makes sense women are treated as men because it makes no sense treating men as women knowing their consequences for actions will be lessened.
@jasontater
@jasontater 3 жыл бұрын
Raising a boy like a girl is so much more likely to Breed a misogynistic person rather than a feminist.
@christophercombs7561
@christophercombs7561 3 жыл бұрын
@@jasontater given the 40 years of miandrist girl power in medua alone will do that
@Connor.Klassen
@Connor.Klassen 3 жыл бұрын
Preach out here lookin like a Nickelodeon super villian
@guacamoleniqqapenis7312
@guacamoleniqqapenis7312 3 жыл бұрын
He look like a villan from Miraculous
@ZERO_O7X
@ZERO_O7X 3 жыл бұрын
That Fedora Drip tho
@jordinhocharles
@jordinhocharles 3 жыл бұрын
Looking like Doug’s sister 😂😂😂
@wtr3059
@wtr3059 3 жыл бұрын
He needed that beret. How else are we supposed to know he speaks french?
@LimiLimi7
@LimiLimi7 Жыл бұрын
I’m 33 now and I get it. I’m the youngest of two, a woman, and have an older brother. I would HATE it that he got more freedom when we’re a kid and even today. He wasn’t as careful as I am and would constantly get in trouble. But I get it, and I appreciate it.
@ninamariaDS
@ninamariaDS 2 жыл бұрын
Dads are humans too. I believe they should feel like they can show their feelings too. Seeing my dad greaving after his father's and brother's dad, didn't make him weak in my eyes. The opposite. It brought us closer, because I was feeling it too. We were greaving together. Plus I knew he was real and honest. It takes courage to show yourself being vulnerable. And you can only do it when you feel safe with a person you are showing yourself to. Such bond is priceless. What's important of course is how old are kids when such things happen. Of course little kids need to see their parents as invincibles, to feel safe. But when you are in your teens on twenties, you are mature enough to understand, and appreciate the fact that your dad is being just himself, honest, not hiding his emotions.
@elithecreative5328
@elithecreative5328 3 жыл бұрын
Father’s are naturally protective over their daughters because they know how guys think, and mothers are naturally protective over their sons because they know how girls think.... depending on the experiences of the parent would be more or less protective.... the point is treat them equally but raise them differently..
@redlife3466
@redlife3466 3 жыл бұрын
Yes 💯
@WhynoMoral
@WhynoMoral 3 жыл бұрын
nicely said. I agree. Parents have a responsibility for their children. Every parent loves their child and mostly want the best for them. Young children doen't think that you talk from experience because why should they. Some people have some deep shit engraved into their brains that tey get overprotective and shit.
@carolynhernandez7067
@carolynhernandez7067 3 жыл бұрын
Good men and boys are naturally protective, both my 12 year old son is already protective of me and my daughter.
@richardcarte139
@richardcarte139 3 жыл бұрын
No offense intended, but there is no universal way that guys normal women think like you implied in your comment. It’s peoples environment they were reared in, what values they were reared with and who they were reared around that Shapes their personalities and decision-making regardless of gender or physical sex.
@richardcarte139
@richardcarte139 3 жыл бұрын
@@carolynhernandez7067 Everyone is naturally protective it’s a universal human instinct.
@ablebodied175
@ablebodied175 3 жыл бұрын
I think what people fail to see when it comes to the "I wouldn't send my daughter out but I'd be fine with sending my son out" is that they are basically making a decision between whos safety they value more. With sons, and I am not saying people do this malevolently, people are much more willing for them to go out in risky situations. Sons can go work on construction sites, on oil digging grids in the ocean and families will in general be like "Aight". I keep seeing this "The world is so dangerous for women" and it is I agree but its almost always followed up with "Men wouldn't know". Really? We wouldn't? Bottom of the line the world is dangerous for men and women its just that we are more willing to let men face that danger than women and I don't think people recognize that enough.
@RalphJr-xp3hp
@RalphJr-xp3hp 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you 👏🏾👏🏾💯💯💯. The same applies when it comes to moving furniture. They always make guys/boys move heavy materials that can injure or kill them if not taking safety precautions. And the old saying “It’s because you’re a man and you have to do it.” I reply back, “No I don’t have to. I don’t have to say the same thing towards a woman/girl if it’s something you’re commonly used to seeing them doing daily.”
@glorysicon9750
@glorysicon9750 3 жыл бұрын
I agree to an extent but it’s also because men and woman play different roles in society. those men weren’t forced into working dangerous jobs, they chose to. men and woman value and provide value to different situations and things. I would bet the son enjoys performing tasks like that because it is a show of independence, capability, and responsibility. The son would also be more well equipped to defend himself if something were to happen. I do think that we should acknowledge those roles and the difficulties or problems that come with each of them, the truth is nobody really has it easy in life.
@notanotherone5564
@notanotherone5564 3 жыл бұрын
Well said 👏👏👏👏
@nunya887
@nunya887 3 жыл бұрын
@Ablebodied i think that men are more suited to protect themselves while women are usually not
@KM-mj3zg
@KM-mj3zg 3 жыл бұрын
@Able Bodied you are so so right....i'm 25 and married, my husband was away for a couple of days and i heard noises in the attic i was telling my dad about the noises so he came over and he and my brother checked it out. As my dad and brother were up there i started climbing the ladder to come up and my dad yelled don't come up here.....i said to him later if i were a man you wouldn't have tried to stop me from entering the attic in my own home....my dad looked at me and with no pause said, " yea you're right it can be dangerous up there and you don't need to be up there"....i asked him if he was a mysogynists he said, "nope i just love my daughter"....how could i get upset at that.... turned out we had squirrels in the atttic and my dad had no problem putting himself and my brother in what may or may not be a dangerous situation to protect me...so Able Bodied you are right it is expected that men will put themselves in dangerous situations and society expects them to and it's really something that we should acknowledge more and give men credit for doing.
@jeremyfallock4088
@jeremyfallock4088 3 жыл бұрын
Sharing with someone what you're going through while showing them you have it under controle is a very great sign of strength.
@jasmine_daville
@jasmine_daville 3 жыл бұрын
They told Citlalli it was a safe space because some mothers will be afraid of vulnerability & shut it down. She’s emotionally distraught.
@brionnachristine4674
@brionnachristine4674 3 жыл бұрын
If I didn’t come home at 14 year olds without telling my dad where I was going or ASKING if could go, my dad would have dragged my ass to hell and back.
@frankiecipres1899
@frankiecipres1899 3 жыл бұрын
Your father raise your right brionna 👍
@price6080
@price6080 3 жыл бұрын
Most Kids raised African/African American can't even imagine facing our parents at midnight without telling them where we were. You'D rather not come back at all😂
@SuperMisteryMan01
@SuperMisteryMan01 3 жыл бұрын
Teens are so dumb sometimes even tho they’re not They can get bothered being asked stuff like that but my older cousin actually puts it in some real terms “Ok. So how or who’s gonna know where you gonna go, where you gonna be, who with, and/or at what time?” M
@dark3rthanshadows
@dark3rthanshadows 3 жыл бұрын
i get so suprise with freedom teens have today . When i was 14 my life was "school -home-home-school" with special moments i could hang out with my friends. I get so suprised these teens are going like to parties or just leaving without telling their parents where they went.
@pillaygabrielle4450
@pillaygabrielle4450 3 жыл бұрын
Yeah same. At 14 I was supposed to be home at 6 o'clock in summer and 5 o'clock in winter. I'd still be grounded if I did that
@davidfreeman6494
@davidfreeman6494 3 жыл бұрын
"Stop crying or ill give you a reason to cry" - mom.
@LilYungSatch
@LilYungSatch 3 жыл бұрын
Me responding: "you already did"
@lorenacuenca6250
@lorenacuenca6250 3 жыл бұрын
My dad also did that. A lot. No physical abuse, just a lot of emotional trauma. I hope you're ok 😊
@toethlef8994
@toethlef8994 3 жыл бұрын
My dad did the same thing. Right after tearing my butt up. Made me strong, haven’t gotten a whooping since I was like 11, Im 17 now.
@mangodotcom
@mangodotcom 3 жыл бұрын
@@lorenacuenca6250 wait thats already considered as trauma? i thought thats just normal
@aubreebethune1674
@aubreebethune1674 3 жыл бұрын
Oh my gosh my parents said the exact same thing
@kelseybrown9959
@kelseybrown9959 3 жыл бұрын
Aba and Preach are giving my hope on raising my son. I just found out I’m having a boy and I was surprised by my reaction: fear. As a woman, I know how to prepare my daughter for the world and the unfairness in it. But I’m terrified for my son because idk all the things he will face. I have to lean on my husband it’s just scary for me not to know
@livinonacloud
@livinonacloud 3 жыл бұрын
Back in the day, a very good guy friend of mine offered to let me live with him when I needed a place to go. Neither of my parents were okay with it. I was upset with them at the time, but as a 40 year old woman who has watched her own daughters make some unfortunate decisions in the same area, I get it. I know why they didn't think it was a good idea for their single daughter to move in with a single guy. Proximity + opportunity can equal trouble and unintended consequences. It's just reality. My intent was good and so was his, but that would have been like moving into a pressure cooker. I'm glad my parents spoke up. I'm more glad that I heeded their advice. I have nothing to regret out of that situation.
@Ash_Wen-li
@Ash_Wen-li 3 жыл бұрын
She said we shouldn't try to put the onus on girls protecting themselves, but rather on the boys to be better men Is that not an example of raising them differently?
@sokoyaadedolapo5321
@sokoyaadedolapo5321 3 жыл бұрын
She's using a different dictionary
@tonywebb1403
@tonywebb1403 3 жыл бұрын
Her statement itself is ridiculous and reeks of privilege
@07citychamp
@07citychamp 3 жыл бұрын
I'll never understand the idea of not wanting to be able to protect yourself, sure raising people go be better is a nice prospect but it's ultimately unrealistic. There will always be those who wish to harm others.
@lovely1641
@lovely1641 3 жыл бұрын
I think she meant equally where both girls are taught to look after themselves and guys are taught to be better men rather than the girl only having to watch her back
@LM-ix7pk
@LM-ix7pk 3 жыл бұрын
Not only that, but this type of raising reinforce gender roles on men. It pushes them back into being strong protectors and providers, which isn’t a bad thing, but these are the same ppl who think all gender roles, especially those imposed on women, are inherently evil. How is that any different from what you are expecting of men?
@shortyylu
@shortyylu 3 жыл бұрын
My dad was extremely protective and sheltered me. I had no friends, COULDNT leave my house or anything smh.
@zeeqayum4834
@zeeqayum4834 3 жыл бұрын
You are very lucky to have a dad like that
@jedmars2691
@jedmars2691 3 жыл бұрын
You'll be fine. Take care of yourself.
@UZIMAKIHERO
@UZIMAKIHERO 10 ай бұрын
I think a father being able to be vulnerable in front of his children is healthy. Shows that even though men can be strong we are still human. We might want to always be superheroes for our kids but it’s natural for parents to have to come down from that pedestal eventually. Best to walk down than to fall one day.
@chantalkellyman2187
@chantalkellyman2187 3 жыл бұрын
Growing up I always saw my dad as a strong, manly person. We had a strained relationship because he always believed 'tough love' was the solution and I was a sensitive child. But I remember the first time I saw him cry, and it broke my heart because I had finally told him that his tough-love attitude over the years drove me to try to kill myself. Ever since then I have worked hard to be open with him about my feelings as it relates to him and we have never been closer.
@agathachris9722
@agathachris9722 3 жыл бұрын
Wow
@ayyylmao101
@ayyylmao101 3 жыл бұрын
I'm glad that you two have reconciled :)
@thetinker167
@thetinker167 3 жыл бұрын
If I could like a comment multiple times I would for this comment
@SassafrasTee7366
@SassafrasTee7366 3 жыл бұрын
That’s great to hear
@sahermikho
@sahermikho 3 жыл бұрын
@Anonymus X nah you just a dickhead
@RickityKricks
@RickityKricks 3 жыл бұрын
If it's past midnight and my 14 year old isn't home or answering their phone you dang right im calling the cops. Wtf? That little girl never watched the first 48 or any show about people going missing?
@Mojodash1
@Mojodash1 3 жыл бұрын
That little girl is so sheltered, she clearly knows nothing of the potential of being kidnapped and trafficked. These are people the world deem as woke.
@SSingh-nr8qz
@SSingh-nr8qz 3 жыл бұрын
should be required viewing
@ComposedSage75
@ComposedSage75 3 жыл бұрын
They need to watch To Catch a Predator and Dateline and then realize why some parents are overprotective of their kids and should be.
@FullmoonPhantom-dn2sr
@FullmoonPhantom-dn2sr 3 жыл бұрын
Agree, but I’d be worried about any 14 year old out past midnight. Out late without supervision at all. 14 is still very young. There’s dangers out there for both girls and boys.
@bobos245
@bobos245 3 жыл бұрын
Right? You best believe being a 14 year old, she's constantly on her phone. She was doing shit she didn't want her dad to know about. Only her dad didn't know that.
@soversetile
@soversetile 3 жыл бұрын
I really enjoyed this watch. My brothers and I have different fathers and our mom is a very determined woman. She instilled her work ethic in all of us that flourished in different ways. She beat going to college into our psyches which is ironic because both my older brothers went but dropped out while my mother stayed and received the equivalent of her doctorate. My oldest brother went to college with a full ride scholarship because he was amazing in track. He lacked in his studies even tho he was an exceptional student back in high school. The middle child took AP classes all throughout high school and worked harder than anyone I seen for everything he ever attained. He wasn’t given a scholarship even after winning my high school one of its few wrestling championship trophies. He eventually dropped out and now fulfills himself with his religious work. I was sort of the problem child. Never did great in school but I’ve always been clever. Especially growing up at a perfect moment during the digital age. School never interested me and I still don’t know what I want out of life at 22. I recently broke down crying to my girlfriend when she asked me how I’m feeling. I’m scared of being a failure. My father never put pressure on me but my mother did even tho she told me she’ll love me regardless of what I do as I got older. I always sort of think it’s because she realized I’m the ugly duckling out of the kids, without the happy ending. She had a Freudian slip one time remarking at how I’ve failed at most things I attempted. Not victimizing myself by admitting this. I will make something out of life but it definitely hurts.
@theforbiddenfruitshow8305
@theforbiddenfruitshow8305 3 жыл бұрын
Men and women are different...theres nothing wrong with that. I think the problem is generalization of everyone instead of giving out whats best for the individual! In my opinion
@catherineervin2630
@catherineervin2630 3 жыл бұрын
I agree 💯!!!
@pittaaaabread
@pittaaaabread 3 жыл бұрын
@NANA DOTWA I mean that's on you to raise them to be better then that... Let the kid be independent but they' are a part of you.
@lovely1641
@lovely1641 3 жыл бұрын
Yeah but it's like what Aba and Preach said: the real world is not going to treat you that way. People are going to generalize you first before anything else
@michal31131
@michal31131 3 жыл бұрын
Indeed, this should be per individual
@thetruth4654
@thetruth4654 3 жыл бұрын
Of course such generalization will happen when the political push seems to be for total conformity, no individuality allowed i think 2020 is a testament to that
@WafflesLover95
@WafflesLover95 3 жыл бұрын
"she can be just sitting but she's good looking, is that teasing?" "yes" NO! People need to be educated in this sense - i remember my sister's boyfriend talking about how one of his female teachers dressed in a "provocative" way. I asked him if she wore tight clothes, tops that revealed her cleavage, short skirts, etc, and no, she didn't wear any of those things. "What do you mean then, how did she dress provocatively?" and he starts describing a boat neckline top she once wore, so i asked if he felt she dressed provocatively just because she wore clothes that fit her well and made her look good "umm... yeah i guess" This type of mentality is really concerning. Going from "she dresses well" to "she dresses in a provocative way" is the same type of reasoning that leads "she dresses in a provocative way" to "she was asking for it"
@breadngravy3860
@breadngravy3860 3 жыл бұрын
As a man, I'd like to add my humble 2 cents to your comment and I hope they're of some value to you. I thought what you said was both interesting, and to share a word you used, concerning. I'm not surprised at all by what he said, can echo the same outlook personally, and in fact have an opinion (technically an opinion, but really it's my belief) further to this point: all men think this way. I'm glad you heard it and even more so that it registered with you so much that you took note of it - especially as you come across as fairly young (correct me if I'm wrong). Also, good on him - you should know he answered your questions completely honestly. I can understand why you found it shocking, and can even understand why you came to the conclusion you did that had you very concerned after connecting some dots. Maybe fair to say concerned to the point it disturbed you. This is what I have a problem with. Especially when you made the 'she was asking for it' connection. While I admit I think all men think this way, and while I agree with you that it is pretty gross and simple, it is by no means evil or inherently bad in any way. Just because we think this way, doesn't mean to say it defines us or dictates our actions. I think you're right and wrong. You're right to be concerned. It would be wrong if that same concern became the basis for an ill suspicion of, and contempt for, all men. Apologies for the novel. Awful and annoying habit of mine.
@WafflesLover95
@WafflesLover95 3 жыл бұрын
@@breadngravy3860 Thank you for your answer! It's good to get some insight on the matter. Though i can understand men (and women, cause we notice too) might be more interested in someone who knows how to dress in a way that is flattering, i found it weird that he'd say she was dressing provocatively. What makes me then feel concerned is that in conversations where some men just feel a woman looks good, and others feel she's asking for it, both might simply say she's dressing in a provocative manner. The second group of men might see it as a comfirmation that yeah, she is asking for it. I am aware some women dress in ways that show more skin and enjoy the attention that attracts, others may enjoy dressing like that but not the attention, and i'm not sure about how i would feel calling that provocative, because i understand... but there's also the intention behind it and i don't read minds. But when it's just someone who dresses "well" who gets these comments, my mind is blown and not in a good way - saying something like that implies that the woman is trying to gain something from dressing like that, or that acting based on her outfit is somehow justified. I don't expect you to agree, nor am i trying to convince you. But i think calling out these "innocent" comments might cause the people who say it not so innocently to think twice
@goofydoober1319
@goofydoober1319 3 жыл бұрын
@@WafflesLover95 like they said in the video when you get to that age for a guy the smallest stuff could make a guy feel some type of way like when he said a girl touches his arm i mean its really just like that i mean i understand it's weird but its the truth a girl could just simply look good and a guy is gonna be a guy it sounds ugly like that but its true but yes we are taught to restrain ourselves and we do need to work on it some more its just difficult at that age
@WafflesLover95
@WafflesLover95 3 жыл бұрын
@@goofydoober1319 i get that (x And honestly, it's totally normal that you feel something just cause a cute girl touched your arm. But from that to saying she's teasing is the leap that concerns me. She's just minding her own business, but because she looks good she's teasing? That's saying that she's purposefully (is that how you write it?) doing something to get your attention, to get you to lust after her. And it's fine you are giving that attention and lusting and whatever, just make sure you realize that those things might be coming from you alone, not her. If she is teasing, it probably means she wants something with you. But if she's not don't get it confused I don't think all men are bad, but i'm aware there are a few bad apples, and sometimes learning this type of distinction is enough to stop a lot of bad things from happening
@treyjetson5320
@treyjetson5320 3 жыл бұрын
I've literally only ever heard "she was asking for it" in a comedic way. Where are these men saying this seriously??
@Deroliebe
@Deroliebe 2 жыл бұрын
As a woman that was "overprotected" by her parents... all that made me is sneaky and a liar. We're going to get in worse trouble if we feel that the TRUST isn't there. Soon as I could I left and joined the Marines. Now I have free college. Also, the girl with the roommate situation with a boy - that made me laugh. Here in NYC you live with all sorts of people as roommates. I've lived with men and women and since we're all ADULTS and PROFESSIONALS, there has not been any issue of "hooking up." Jesus. As for the story of the father making the 14-year-old son go to the part with the 18-year-old girl, you see nothing wrong with that? That's fucked up. You're saying a grown ADULT woman is less than a 14-year-old child. Yes, women need to be more cautious, I'm not saying be stupid and assume the world is rainbows and sunshine, but infantilizing women is NOT the answer.
@10199730
@10199730 3 жыл бұрын
My biggest thing growing up was that my parents treated me differently than my brother, who's only 1yr older. Like when he was 16 he could stay out till 10 but when I was 16 I had to be home by 8. Like I wanted the same treatment he got when he was my age.
@kenz2756
@kenz2756 3 жыл бұрын
@Cher rachia Vinson I disagree about one of your points, it's not about you being 'strong enough', it's about what risks you are taking. Now, both boys and girls are prone to being a victim of violence, infact I'm inclined to say boys are more prone to this. The difference is what type of violence it is, when it happens to boys, it's usually from either outrage, accident, maybe racism, who knows. People are less violent to girls in general, but there's the sexual assault we haven't factored in. Sexual assault in a way is much worse than violence, you can barely fight this sort of thing, you can only avoid or prevent it.
@kenz2756
@kenz2756 3 жыл бұрын
@Cher rachia Vinson You're wrong, one gender is more prone to violence (more chance of being a victim to violence, was I saying that right?). Common men don't typically lash out on women they don't know, but say you go in a traffic accident, if you're both men, there's a high chance one of you will become violent against the other man. In this scenario it's seen as highly dishonorable to attack a lady, period. But when a boy experiences this type of violence, as unfortunate as it is, it's barely ever traumatic. But say a girl experience sexual assault? It's highly disgusting and will leave a very negative memory in your head. About women not being able to defend themselves, statistically, this would be the truth, the thing is, it's not even strictly about defending yourself, but even people making perverted remarks on you alone is worse than physical assault in a way, which is why parents are more protective to daughters. Women have to carry tasers/sprays while men don't, that alone tells you the different risks we get.
@stma05
@stma05 3 жыл бұрын
It was exactly the same thing for me, and what made me the most angry about it growing up is that I was responsible and he was incredibly reckless.
@migueljuarez6788
@migueljuarez6788 3 жыл бұрын
@Cher rachia Vinson Maybe you're not strong enough to protect yourself? Have you thought that maybe that was a possibility?
@AkshayKumar-ue1fp
@AkshayKumar-ue1fp 3 жыл бұрын
@Cher rachia Vinson men are targets for violence more than women, why are you deflecting?
@threat645
@threat645 3 жыл бұрын
Ben trapped his daughter when he told her “ What ever energy you give me im going to give back” He emotionally trapped her. Thats why shes so monotone and afraid go big emotions. Maybe he hasn’t realized what he’s done cause it was done to him by his parents.
@LadyIcee
@LadyIcee 3 жыл бұрын
I agree with this. So many parents don't realize that when they do this kids don't feel comfortable talking to them. I was in the boat with parents. I still have trouble talking to them now as an adult because of it.
@SDL-xu7em
@SDL-xu7em 3 жыл бұрын
I have 5 siblings and all are emotionally broken and 3 (all male) showing effects of this in there angry outbursts and selfish aswell as reckless behaviour..I too have struggled but I am the oldest..and the most difficult part is getting them to realise they are following the same trend he has set and acting out his personality within there own..its also seeped into my step mum and her family and they all keep locked up whilst using anger and passive aggressiveness to shield there true feelings mainly because they all rely in him financially and dont have the self belief to change themselves or try to help him change parts of himself so far...my father is not a confident man and shields this with materialist approaches time and again with what he has instead of who he is so everybody is a ghost to themselves and destroying there own spirit. I can honestly say I know alot about this subject!
@FlyXcur
@FlyXcur 3 жыл бұрын
The problem was the miscommunication with that quote you can tell what Ben means is if she's upset he will do everything in his power to uplift here as you can see when he talks about how he'll never be disappointed and will always love her unconditionally. She misread this as "if I'm upset he'll be upset and what if I'm mad at him? He'll be just as mad at me." Ben's intention was equal energy to counter balance and help her.
@SilkKimono
@SilkKimono 3 жыл бұрын
@@FlyXcur I agree. It like he’s telling her ‘hey this is important to you and I will make it important to me as well’. Assuming the worst has done more damage to her and her relationship with her father than anything else.
@NatureFreak1127
@NatureFreak1127 3 жыл бұрын
I might have misunderstood, but it seems to me like he made her responsible for his emotions and reactions by saying that. Why else would she have anxiety around him? It seems like she is walking on eggshells.
@midcharles7989
@midcharles7989 3 жыл бұрын
Why is this even a conversation Of course you gotta raise daughters and sons differently Not better Not worse Just different 🤦🏿‍♂️
@notanotherone5564
@notanotherone5564 3 жыл бұрын
I agree. The issue is, new age idealogy wants to teach traditionalism to the girls and feminism to the boys.
@fluffywhitemanju
@fluffywhitemanju 3 жыл бұрын
@@notanotherone5564 wtf is this strawman, I dont know a single person that thinks that way
@melaniebustamante2532
@melaniebustamante2532 3 жыл бұрын
@@fluffywhitemanju Not because you don't know anyone that thinks like that. Doesn't mean people don't think this way.
@HeyoitsJay
@HeyoitsJay 3 жыл бұрын
EXACTLY THANK YOU
@itstriplem2069
@itstriplem2069 3 жыл бұрын
@@fluffywhitemanju ha as a teen dude that's cap. Its all around me. They trying to suppress us dudes and call masculinity toxic.
@kariw.160
@kariw.160 3 жыл бұрын
Males and females are NOT the same. We have beautiful differences. We absolutely have had to raise them a bit differently. I’m raising my boys to be protective, honest, hard working, decent human beings. They will hopefully one day be good fathers who take care of their families. My girls I’ve raised to be vocal & strong, but also safe, smart, trust a bit less, take less risks, get an education so they will always be able to take care of themselves…
@morob1981
@morob1981 3 жыл бұрын
I was raised by my dad and he always made me feel protected, but also feel ok to be vulnerable around me. I never read my dad's emotions as weakness. I just saw him as more human. Now as a mom, I try to make sure that my girls value there father and brother for who they are and how they feel. I know that I have to give them different perspectives being that they are Black in America and males are a threat even from a young age. Younge girl are sexualized, so I make sure they are ready for the world and feel safe to seek refuge from us. Great episode, guys.
@abbeyt6246
@abbeyt6246 3 жыл бұрын
I don’t like that they used parents that didn’t have sons AND daughters. They can’t know, they are just speculating, so I think thay was. huge flaw in this.
@darkwriter_xx94
@darkwriter_xx94 3 жыл бұрын
If anything, to really test this, they should’ve found parents with twins of each genders. That way there’s no other factors for differential treatment other than gender.
@ashleycrystal9719
@ashleycrystal9719 3 жыл бұрын
@@darkwriter_xx94 good one
@Demonsouls1993
@Demonsouls1993 3 жыл бұрын
As far im aware from what I seen in that footage its only the 1 guy who doesn't have a son the other 2 have son(s) and daughter(s)
@darkwriter_xx94
@darkwriter_xx94 3 жыл бұрын
@@Demonsouls1993 yeah but then it can always be explained away that one is older which was the case with the girl and the curfew. If they’re the exact same age then the only difference would be gender.
@irishale8703
@irishale8703 3 жыл бұрын
Yes. But. Please teach your daughter to change a tire. And work a chainsaw. Teach her how to drink safely. And drift her car. Not just say "that's boy stuff" because that's truly how you raise men and women differently. Yes. Women need to be safe. But teach them to be strong and fight. Teach them to have a back bone.
@sleepinggorilla
@sleepinggorilla 3 жыл бұрын
And teach them to say “No!” early and sincerely. Girls should learn "boy's stuff" because it's part of being an adult. Same with "woman's work" it takes 2 to raise children and maintain a household. I'm in my 40's and my parents are still teaching me how to be a man.
@asinine8143
@asinine8143 3 жыл бұрын
Yes, I definitely agree. And teach your sons the responsibility of cooking, cleaning, and caring for a household properly. Basic life skills are needed for both boys and girls. Your kids will thank you, because when they're on their own they won't feel shocked from all the work they have to put in.
@fearthemerciful
@fearthemerciful 3 жыл бұрын
unless they're fighting another woman, 99% of the time the woman will lose a fight in self-defense. Obviously everyday lifeskills are useful to everyone. But cut the bullcrap on "women can do everything a man can do equally". We're different and that's okay.
@GottesKrieger
@GottesKrieger 3 жыл бұрын
Boys need to be taught the same how to protect themselves and be safe. More men are killed yearly by other men than women are. Bullies, predators evil doers bad shit in general does not discriminate on gender.
@irishale8703
@irishale8703 3 жыл бұрын
@@GottesKrieger I wasn't saying don't teach men these things. I was saying start normalizing it and teaching it to women as well. Everyone needs to know this shit. Hate doesn't care about race, gender, religon, sexual orientation... It's gonna happen regardless. I understand that. Im not dense. However. This topic is about women and how they are raised differently.
@James-mw1yf
@James-mw1yf 3 жыл бұрын
It's not even that the father is overprotective. He said: "She didn't pick up her phone." Not that I know this guy, but I would assume that if she actually answered and said, "Hey, I'm just out with friends. I will be home by 11-12 pm", he probably wouldn't have called the cops. He might not be okay with the time she wants to come back by, but that's a different story.
@mystickayla5847
@mystickayla5847 3 жыл бұрын
"OKAY BENJAMIN HERES HOW YOU INSERT A TAMPON" 💀😭😭
@ishyyboo
@ishyyboo 3 жыл бұрын
“Like every immigrant parent you need 7-10 business days to tell them where you’re going” 😂
@Umarohh
@Umarohh 3 жыл бұрын
FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACTS
@ayyylmao101
@ayyylmao101 3 жыл бұрын
Gotta submit a permission slip 💀
@belfreak_386
@belfreak_386 3 жыл бұрын
They give me the permission but then when the day comes for me to go they decided that they changed their mind and tell me I no longer have permission to go anymore 🥲😂
@jonathandjing1065
@jonathandjing1065 3 жыл бұрын
Happened to me as a teen ! Got cancelled the night before 🤣🤣😂😭
@juniorngcobo
@juniorngcobo 3 жыл бұрын
Faxxx
@chacchan3791
@chacchan3791 3 жыл бұрын
This is a weird question. Not one kid should be raised the same as another kid. Every kid is an individual. 🤷🏼‍♀️
@danielsemakula1526
@danielsemakula1526 3 жыл бұрын
🤝🏿
@nokulungamthembu581
@nokulungamthembu581 3 жыл бұрын
Exactly what I was thinking!! 100%
@purplebanana6420
@purplebanana6420 3 жыл бұрын
I think you misunderstood of course not every kid should be raised the same but if you're letting your 14 yr son stay out for hours without contacting him and being like hes a boy he'll be fine but your 14 yr daughter you go above and beyond to get in contact freaking out because she's a girl and she cant handle herself like a boy can thats pretty unfair and bogus
@hopeintruth5119
@hopeintruth5119 3 жыл бұрын
@@purplebanana6420 not really kidnap for teenage boys isn't out the equation, them getting into drugs or in gangs aren't out the equation, something really terrible happen to them isn't out the equation. You should check on both for there Safety and having responsibility over them
@danielsemakula1526
@danielsemakula1526 3 жыл бұрын
@@purplebanana6420 exactly thank u. U understand me. Both literally have an equal chance of something happening to them while there out.
@OldSparks
@OldSparks Жыл бұрын
I already know that having a daughter is gonna be a lot of work and maintenance. You try to protect them and you set rules to protect them from the world. They think you’re trying to ruin their lives but they just don’t understand it until they’re older and have kids of their own. I’m gonna be having one, y’all pray for me lol
@arielmiles3940
@arielmiles3940 3 жыл бұрын
I loved this Jubilee video. Especially at 14:03. That is exactly what I have been going through and I am glad that my relationship with my dad has some similarities with others. It allows me to feel more valid in my conversations with him and to know I am not crazy.
@AkshayBadade
@AkshayBadade Жыл бұрын
They have a toxic relationship
@mikedeuce13
@mikedeuce13 3 жыл бұрын
Father of 4 grown daughters here, it’s different. I was overprotective because I didn’t want to raise victims, and they are not. They are productive, responsible adult women raising their own children in a productive, responsible way.
@nyambsdeborah8954
@nyambsdeborah8954 3 жыл бұрын
Yasss!!❤️💕💕👏
@mallyk8199
@mallyk8199 3 жыл бұрын
I'm sorry I know it was not in your attention, but it kinda sounded like you think a victim of sexual assault or harrassment couldn't also be a productive responsible person with a family. A victim can be just as successful in life. What happens doesn't define them.
@Javi808
@Javi808 3 жыл бұрын
@@mallyk8199 He means that he didn’t want his daughters to play victim, and blame everyone else but themselves for the consequences of their choices in life. He made sure that they took accountability for their choices.
@thatoneweirdkidthatyoudisl6723
@thatoneweirdkidthatyoudisl6723 3 жыл бұрын
@@Javi808 but why can’t they do the same for the sons
@bambam-jo6ek
@bambam-jo6ek 3 жыл бұрын
That’s pretty naive of you to say, my father taught me how be accountable for everything that I have done and plan to do in the future from life skills to relationships, jobs and etc. what is up with this negative image of men having no sense of accountability along with having misogynistic views against women. 90% of us men were taught how to treat women and are aware of the things that happen to women and also hold other men accountable for their. I just find it hella unfair as a man to be grouped with those kind of labels by women that don’t even know me 😕
@woodenmetal2977
@woodenmetal2977 3 жыл бұрын
"You're never gonna disappoint me. Like, nothing you do will ever disappoint me." *Asian kids with a B on their report cards* : "Some people are just born lucky, aren't they?"
@hkr667
@hkr667 3 жыл бұрын
That was empty virtue talk. His daughter already crushed his soul when she wanted to live with her mom full time. It's just a nice thing to say.
@josephbth5562
@josephbth5562 3 жыл бұрын
B?? From what I heard..try A- 😂😂
@kshitizjha
@kshitizjha 3 жыл бұрын
@@josephbth5562 It's an A+, only an O can even begin to not disappoint them parents.
@twistedumbrella7537
@twistedumbrella7537 3 жыл бұрын
I thought 99/100 disappointed their parents.
@kshitizjha
@kshitizjha 3 жыл бұрын
@@twistedumbrella7537 It does. Even 100/100 is a tough go.
@gametime2473
@gametime2473 2 жыл бұрын
Imagine a daughter mad that her dad cares that she may be in danger. Daughters ARE more vulnerable than sons generally, that is just a fact. I have three daughters and I definitely treat them differently in situations that could be risky. As it happened, one young man did experience my intervention. Thankfully he moved out of state shortly thereafter which was a smart move on his part. I hope his life is going well.
@gapster77
@gapster77 2 жыл бұрын
I have one child, a boy. I’m trying to raise him to be confident, considerate, but to also be tough when he needs to be. It’s not an easy gig to raise a kid, realising that your essentially shaping them, but then also allowing them develop their own personality. I know that if I had a girl I’d be a very different Dad, I’d likely be a push over, and a little too over protective. When it all comes down to it you have to try to make them, in the present sense and in the future, as happy and able in life as you can …whilst realising and dealing with how you yourself aren’t, like I said it’s not an easy gig. Children are shaped by your failures just as much as your successes.
@TheCinderellaPrincess
@TheCinderellaPrincess 3 жыл бұрын
Yes, girls and boys should be raised differently. However the values they have should be the same.
@crypt0640
@crypt0640 3 жыл бұрын
@Wake No. sometimes parents teach the values differently and it comes across differently, or they dont teach a value because it never occurs to them that they need to say it. Where they may teach a son about the necessity of consent from a partner, they may not teach a daughter. Where they may teach emotional coping mechanisms to a daughter they may not teach it to a son.
@uk-xc1ol
@uk-xc1ol 3 жыл бұрын
@Wake No. like the parents only expecting the daughters to do the chores of cleaning and never expect or ask the sons to clean and let them just play games all day
@gilgamos_5658
@gilgamos_5658 3 жыл бұрын
@@uk-xc1ol n do they make the girls shovel the snow mow lawns, carry heavy shit w the cars this n that. Y is it hard to admit that all gender roles r different but as long as both r valued equally, it's fine?
@uk-xc1ol
@uk-xc1ol 3 жыл бұрын
@@gilgamos_5658 maybe it's because I didn't have a dad but my mom never told my brother to do those things, she was just expecting me to do cleaning and cooking because she could teach since she was taught that and "it'd make me a good wife". And we don't get snow and we live in an apartment who mows our lawn lol and we would take the heavy parts from my mom so we could help... she wouldn't even ask or expect because it is just that easy or we never have super heavy parts I guess.
@gilgamos_5658
@gilgamos_5658 3 жыл бұрын
@@uk-xc1ol well that's unfortunate but my point stands. It is possible to carry on gender roles as long as both siblings do work that's equally valuable. Your case is your case. In my side, we are all brothers, n I know how to cook clean, raise an actual kid, cars, heavy things n tedious things. Everyone is diff.
@bojangles8873
@bojangles8873 3 жыл бұрын
You raise your kids with the world as it is, not as you want it to be.
@BurriedTruth
@BurriedTruth 3 жыл бұрын
Exactly!
@Seandaguy
@Seandaguy 3 жыл бұрын
A perfect way to sum the whole thing up
@mermaidtingzzz
@mermaidtingzzz 3 жыл бұрын
It's really not a matter of one way over the other. You raise them with the world as it is AND as you want it to be. It can only evolve thru the next generation knowing and doing better than us. In this case, yes be extra cautious with daughters out in the world, but also raise sons to not be dangers to other people's daughters.
@bojangles8873
@bojangles8873 3 жыл бұрын
@@mermaidtingzzz You've misunderstood my premise. I wasn't saying you should raise your kids to not be better then present circumstances, but don't be so naive as to raise your kids so that they are blind to the dangers the world around them presents.
@BurriedTruth
@BurriedTruth 3 жыл бұрын
@@mermaidtingzzz and riddle me this why are men always raised to be courteous to women and treat them like princess but are not raised to be as equally nice towards men? Obviously not all girls and women, know why? Because there are kids out there who are taught to be respectful towards everyone no matter their gender and they grow up to be good people, but its not part of the culture to raise daughters to be as courteous and caring of the other gender as men are.
@c.w.61
@c.w.61 3 ай бұрын
3 years late but still gonna comment. My mom was strict to me and my brother. We were allowed to go out and both had curfews. At 15 curfew was 4. At 16 curfew was 5. So on and so forth. For the both of us. We both split chores, cook, clean everything else. This is how u should treat ur children. It helped us both to develop a sibling relationship. Now when I go out I sometimes invite him even without my mom or dad telling me to.
@RT-xj3of
@RT-xj3of Жыл бұрын
That father on the verge of breaking down saying how his daughter didn’t wanna see him hurts… like to the core. He just wants to be in her life.
@TruckerJohn97
@TruckerJohn97 3 жыл бұрын
“Prepared for the worse but still praying for the best” -Lil Wayne
@Dixon_Cider407
@Dixon_Cider407 3 жыл бұрын
That’s a saying as old as time. Not Lil Wayne’s quote lol respectfully
@TruckerJohn97
@TruckerJohn97 3 жыл бұрын
@@Dixon_Cider407 I know but he did get pardoned recently so seemed funny to mention
@jimbothegymbro7086
@jimbothegymbro7086 3 жыл бұрын
A rule to live by
@mentalalchemy4819
@mentalalchemy4819 3 жыл бұрын
I wish my dad was still here. He was my best friend and I told him everything, he told me everything too once I was old enough. I know he’s still with me always. Rest In Peace and God Bless to everyone else who lost their fathers.
@migueljuarez6788
@migueljuarez6788 3 жыл бұрын
My father aint that great, but it's great to hear that someone loves their father.
@CrayCrayslab
@CrayCrayslab 3 жыл бұрын
My dad died when I was 3 and he was replaced by a pedophile. Trauma ain't fun, but oh well. Can't give up now :)
@mentalalchemy4819
@mentalalchemy4819 3 жыл бұрын
@@migueljuarez6788 My mother was severely abusive and I feel the same way hearing people talk about having a loving mother. My heart goes out to you, man, God Bless.
@mentalalchemy4819
@mentalalchemy4819 3 жыл бұрын
@@CrayCrayslab I hope you’re in a better place now and recognize what a monster that man was. The worst kind of person is one who takes advantage of a helpless child. You are in my prayers and my heart goes out to you. I’m sending love and light your way, God Bless.
@digimonalvatrax2738
@digimonalvatrax2738 3 жыл бұрын
Sorry about your dad stay strong.
@bekahdoug5572
@bekahdoug5572 3 жыл бұрын
I have 3 boys, 20, 19, 16, and one daughter who is 7. The feeling I have raising her, is MUCH different than the boys. I'm definitely raising her different.
@erins.5420
@erins.5420 Жыл бұрын
My daughters mental, physical and emotional needs are far different from my son. They are Irish twins (both born within the same calendar year) 9&10 yrs old. I can’t tell you how drastic the differences are and their needs. Yes they both need love and supportive and available parents. Beyond the basics of a child needing their parents getting more specific and detailed they are opposites in nearly every way. As children they need the same thing but as a son and a daughter they need different supports and have different needs.
@OurKindofEntertainment
@OurKindofEntertainment 3 жыл бұрын
@2:20 I was done the moment you threw in the Jafar joke 😂😂😂😂
@caribbeankpoplover
@caribbeankpoplover 3 жыл бұрын
Saaame 😂😂
@icecoldfire25
@icecoldfire25 3 жыл бұрын
😂😂😂😂
@Risingofthephoenix
@Risingofthephoenix 3 жыл бұрын
He raciiiissssssss 🤣
@NicoBlack69
@NicoBlack69 3 жыл бұрын
I read this before it happened, and it still had me dying.
@will7953
@will7953 3 жыл бұрын
@@Risingofthephoenix but but negas can't be wacist O:
The Joker kisses Harley Quinn underwater!#Harley Quinn #joker
00:49
Harley Quinn with the Joker
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