the fear of truly living

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EDITING & MUSIC By HOUSECAT:
@housecat00
SOURCES
Becker, E. (1975). The denial of death. 1st pbk. ed. New York, Free Press.
Krishnamurti, J. (2021). The Awakening of Intelligence ([edition unavailable]). Krishnamurti Foundation Trust UK. Retrieved from www.perlego.co... (Original work published 2021

[@Sisyphus55]

Get a 7-day free trial and 25% off Blinkist Annual Premium by clicking here: www.blinkist.com/sisyphus or scanning the QR code.

[@theyopo3426]

get dat bank my boy

[@naturexstreamrhythmbeats4724]

Greetingz cuzinz and Earthlingz

[@drewdew1533]

Would you try to collaborate with exurb1a?

[@sneakerbabeful]

​@@naturexstreamrhythmbeats4724p00p

[@ReynaSingh]

“Living in fear is just another way of dying before your time.”

[@juniorvicepresidentofzimba4946]

Fk that's so good. Who said it?

[@ensco7]

I personally think that's true. It feels like I have been dead for half my body's age.

[@juniorvicepresidentofzimba4946]

I wish I knew a shortcut to feeling no fear. I think maybe it's accepting all the bad things that can happen, and then living between them. But something about this doesn't seem right.

[@ensco7]

@@juniorvicepresidentofzimba4946 It doesn't feel right, especially if just a single person wants to convince you that things don't have to be that way. I'm often wondering whether there's a chance to accept the fears to a point where you can manage them in an almost completely apathetic manner. And if I made progress to that point, is the hope that others tried to instill in me just a barrier, causing more pain, trying to face the fears and thus thinking even more of them, tormenting myself by coming to the same conclusions over and over again? Or is it just the biggest, seemingly undoable step of overcoming? Overcoming.. for what? If there is something to overcome, then there has to be something new, something to achieve on the horizon. But I don't see anything. Okay, this isn't exactly the topic. I'm just depressed and don't even know what I would do if I didn't have anxiety.. Sorry guys.

[@chaosthecat9360]

@Junior Vice President Of Zimbabwe Mike Cooley

[@thinclient]

1. Get inspired. 2. Randomly tear up. 3. Euphoric creative state. 4. Realize fear of failure/success will strike back soon. That's too familiar. Thank you for showing, once again, that we are not alone experiencing the scary side of full humanness ❤‍🔥

[@anthonyrebuffo9509]

The answer most of the time is saying FUCKIT and do it anyway

[@anthonyrebuffo9509]

@𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐠𝐨𝐝 after it happens if it happens

[@WinterReflections]

That just sounds like bipolar disorder.

[@anthonyrebuffo9509]

@@WinterReflections guess for you it sounded like a switch of attidude, but the fuck it attitude agaisnt existensial hustle is perpetual, i assure you, you can do nothing about it so why do you care that you cant do anything about it? Do it anyway and be happy

[@volstrekt]

​@@WinterReflectionsyou're telling me that's a disorder? Maybe it's not that extreme lol

[@saltiestsiren]

i think the worst part is being aware you're living in fear, so aware of it so many times a day, and still...doing nothing about it. doing nothing about what makes you afraid or why. i'm in therapy but that's only half the battle. they teach you how to act, but if you're too afraid to act, then you're just taking lessons in a subject you never intend to master.

[@Iammany]

"i think the worst part is being aware you're living in fear, so aware of it so many times a day, and still...doing nothing about it. doing nothing about what makes you afraid"

[@yanxixi17]

"you're just taking lessons in a subject you never intend to master" was said perfectly I don't think I'll ever forget it. But there's some comfort in being in the arms of fear for too long-you will always find it there, and in some time you'll never be "afraid" enough to act upon it. Because it's still and always with you, to a point it doesn't stir conflict in you anymore. Just like when you remove something from a familiar picture or environment and it feels like there's something missing, and you can't tell because you never looked at it enough, it just feels wrong. That's the kind of intimacy we have with always being afraid. I think we've grown into the fear, man's attachment to unchanging and ever-present things, unlike the fleeting reality around us.

[@uzulim9234]

The lessons will accumulate and at some point you will probably start acting on it. Suddenly but powerfully.

[@jackwuotila4895]

dude yeah. been in therapy for a while and ive got the same thing going. fuckin ell mate. lets get over it !!

[@RandomCatFromFrance]

I am so confused Maybe i really am blind That's why i need His help Because He sees everything I feel like i'm so close to figuring it all out, but i actually know nothing: All i know that He knows all.

[@ariasaber9737]

I'm scared of starting something and actually becoming successful. It feels like it would be too much pressure. The thought of succeeding makes me so anxious but I am also terrified of failure as well. I want to be great. But my entire existence pushes against it.

[@daryl9799]

I've been very successful at one point its a constant battle to maintain and once you have it your terrified of loosing it. It's nice to have alot of money, status and things but there's alot that comes with it.

[@jangdi.]

So why don't you slowly build up everything you need, gradually gaining knowledge and do it one by one everyday??? What is wrong with doing it slow? Who the f*ck cares about failure and success if you didn't do nothing?

[@yanxixi17]

it's like having too much, a cup filled to the brim, that I'm afraid I'll end up spilling it. So I end up not seeking my fill, and live with just enough so as to not have something to absolutely not lose. Some things will be unavailable to you for being too cautious, and you can't move to enjoy other things because there's something you can't let go of. I'm afraid of pursuing only one occupation in my life because I might find that I long for something else, and I have climbed too far up to not get hurt in backing down. It's constantly distressing, I can never decide :(

[@ariasaber9737]

@@yanxixi17 I totally feel this. I can't choose an occupation either because I feel like one thing will never satisfy me. Once I choose i'll be stuck, and I can't do every at once. But i'm running out of time and I can't be undecided forever. I'm afraid I might choose something unfulfilling. Truly frustrating.

[@blackwolfdavinci575]

Same, I feel the exact same way.

[@jinhye4]

I've done a couple of things recently that I've been too afraid to do before like: walking my dog at midnight, randomly doing pushups in the middle of a road or walking shirtless through the streets and these activities brought me such a feeling of freedom that made me realize that it's not worth it to live in the world of what ifs instead of just doing stuff you want to. As a certain #1 mage sang: "The less you think, the more you win". Thinking is meant to protect you from danger. By overthinking about simple stuff, you give up control to fear and that's why you live as a coward and not yourself. Take that control back and just do what you want. Yes, it is that simple. Just do it. Overthinking is a waste of time. Don't think too much.

[@commenteroftruth9790]

this why I want brain helpy juice

[@darth6129]

I realized several times this year that I was just too afraid of taking risk. And you can't have reward without risk. It's what makes things like video games or extreme sports fun. The risk vs. rewards dichotomy. It's also what makes things like gambling and alcohol so fun. So it can be damaging when overdone. But having absolutely no risk is a dull life, almost akin to death. Risk will always be a fact of life. Also, think about our society's obsession with wealth, but also our society's obsession with comfort and security. You don't tend to get rich, unless you take a big risk. For example, business owners who make it big are taking such a huge risk, but they get the biggest reward. People who seek only job security only tend to take minimal risk, and they get whatever minimal reward is allotted to them by others. In my opinion, risk is true freedom. That is why I have never seeked to "climb the corporate ladder" as many do. Because that is not true freedom. It's at least not the life I want for myself. But we are constantly told to take the easy way out, because it's safe. For some reason I don't fully understand, it feels wrong to choose a safe life over one filled with risk and reward.

[@rafhael636]

overthinking makes us afraid of overthinking

[@ElJorro]

Pushups in the streets is a bit dangerous but you go!

[@P9rkour90]

Very very true . I needed to hear this thank you 🙏

[@Ryan-oo9zj]

"A man has 2 lives - the first begins when he is born, the 2nd when he realises he only has one life to live"

[@turtleanton6539]

Ooof😮🎉

[@RememberTheDuck]

I heard something similar. It was a comic that talked about how a lifetime is only seven years, because that's how long it takes to truly learn something. Instead of sitting and overthinking about the sheer depth and weight of the world, spend that time working on something. This lifetime is only seven years, after all...

[@anna-mariyablue8580]

"Once you learn how to die, you learn how to live" - Tuesdays with Morrie

[@roflzspas]

I never thought you would talk about Krishnamurti; he is such a treasure. Expanding upon what you mentioned in the video, he also says something very fascinating. Basically, his fundamental view is that everything that happens (whether outside us or inside us) is a totally new and unique moment that has never happened before and will never repeat itself again. He asks whether we really feel "fear", or, rather, do we simply project our individual anxiety on what is a completely unprecedented affect? Are we really 'afraid' or are we simply rushing to label what's happening inside us because it's too scary to live with something totally new? The realization of this is what he calls "freedom from fear". He doesn't intend for us to be stoics, but very much the opposite. He wants us to feel whatever we're feeling so intensely, so utterly, never naming it, that we are wholly liberated from trying to escape ourselves, our emotions, what-is.

[@hugoboch3098]

What book do you recommend from him?

[@LibertyScholar]

@@hugoboch3098 I'm starting with "The First and Last Freedom". It's the most widely read of his works, and probably the broadest introduction to his teachings.

[@LibertyScholar]

@@binodtharu4784 He published quite a few books in his lifetime.

[@binodtharu4784]

@@LibertyScholar oh sorry, chatGPT is giving wrong information 😅. Just AI things

[@gamerrex5940]

​@@binodtharu4784 binod.

[@swamp6825]

I have a fear that I’m not “built” for living or existing here. I’ve been trying really hard to do things even though they give me major anxiety but everything is overwhelming. I don’t know, might as well go after what you want “the time will pass anyway” and “do it scared” are two of my favorite quotes

[@seanmccullough3863]

Change your lifestyle and values. If you’re too anxious to be alive, clearly something isn’t right with your thought patterns.

[@swamp6825]

@@seanmccullough3863 Oh yeah for sure I’m diagnosed with an anxiety disorder but it’s a lot better than it used to be so I’m working on it

[@aydennreda]

I feel the same way.

[@BobbyFisaher]

I feel like we think our decisions are super critical to our survival but 90% aren’t the consequences usually aren’t too negative and plus we can learn from them so nothing is really a failure unless we don’t learn from it. Although I still stress a lot and with you with that thought what happens if I’m not built for all this, I try to keep this in mind when my mind wanders, family helps too and prayer

[@rafhael636]

Part of the pain we suffer comes from our own mind and not the problems itself

[@jessbunz3046]

Yet again he makes another well timed video-

[@myseelium13]

After attempting suicide when I was in my late teens and having a near death experience, I was faced with what I believe was ego death, however I had no guide nor the cognitive framework ready for when I didn't die to process what I had experienced. It destroyed me (I have complex ptsd as well from many things before & after) and I have been swirling in a void of in-betweenness ever since. I only started resurfacing at the start of the pandemic when I was faced with a similar isolation as the one that had ultimately led to my suicide attempt. I am still working on rejoining the world again at 30 years old but your video has really put some things into perspective for me. Thank you for showing me a different level in the simulation :)

[@mrhirstteaches8370]

Keep going friend. It’s worth it and you’re worth it.

[@myseelium13]

@@mrhirstteaches8370 thank you, it always helps to hear it when you've heard it so little

[@johnscallobs8273]

you are seen. i hear you my friend. may it give you some comfort that we are all lost and scared in this together

[@YeshuaLovesYou.]

1 Corinthians 15:1-4 NLT - Let me now remind you, dear brothers and sisters, of the Good News I preached to you before. You welcomed it then, and you still stand firm in it. It is this Good News that saves you if you continue to believe the message I told you-unless, of course, you believed something that was never true in the first place. I passed on to you what was most important and what had also been passed on to me. Christ died for our sins, just as the Scriptures said. He was buried, and he was raised from the dead on the third day, just as the Scriptures said.

[@Helenurrrr]

The world is so blessed you are still here

[@andrewcabrera505]

One of my biggest fears is that I’m not actually cut out for it. Like I dream of being a writer, and in my head that dream can be realized and I can always imagine being an incredible writer. But if I try to write and end up being horrible, or can’t make ends meet once it comes to a point where I need to make actual sacrifices, suddenly the dream is dead. The only way I can assure it survives is by making sure it’s never realized.

[@cooperriehl944]

It can be truly satisfying to have a dream and never act on it. The flip side of this is that, by holding on to the dream, you're also putting a limit on your ability to experience the world even more fully. Keeping the dream inside you is like setting up camp at a fork in the road. Maybe one path leads to ruin and another to ecstasy. Maybe both to ruin. Maybe both to ecstasy. You'll never know unless you either follow your dream, or let it go.

[@shadow8594]

I recommend you do isha kriya meditation on youtube. It creates a distance between your mind and body giving you freedom and clarity. It makes you a more joyful and balanced person and it especially helped me in terms of mental health so I hope it helps you too.

[@LeakyOrifices]

Maybe you could start with small steps? Lessen the fear so that you can begin to approach your passion, look at writing with curiosity, that sort of thing?

[@swalan124]

By shifting your mindset and focusing on the joy of writing, personal growth, and the process itself, you can continue dreaming about becoming a successful writer, regardless of the outcome. Don't let the fear of failure discourage you from pursuing your dreams. Embrace the possibilities, stay resilient, and keep nurturing your creativity.

[@mrhirstteaches8370]

Live your life so that you can sing My Way by Frank Sinatra. If you write or not, whatever you do, make sure you don’t regret it

[@turbovirgin_]

You're talking about ego death. That feeling of liberation, and possibility, and rawness, and oneness with the world around you. I've felt it before. It's awesome in the classical sense, and utterly terrifying. What I've learned about ego death is that it's temporary. The ego doesn't really die, it just shuts down in self-protection. Then there's nothing protecting you from the full, overwhelming force of all your emotions. When you stop weeping in joy and start interacting with the world again, you start noticing the parts of the world that aren't extremes of majesty and terror. The little annoyances, the chores, the people around you, the posters you hung up in your room. That's when your ego starts back up, when it's safe. Your sense of self comes back, it always does. My goal isn't to kill my sense of self and live without fear. My goal is to develop a sense of self strong enough to withstand the fear, and the dread, and the awe, and the sheer possibility of life, and come out the other side intact. I don't just want to live in the moment, I want to take the moment and make it a part of myself. I want to graft experiences onto myself, and digest them, and share them with others. I want to take the fear, and awe, and possibility, and wield it. I want to make the moment that others experience. But that's just me.

[@anikabharwani]

you are beautiful

[@matteobosa]

It’s good to see someone with the same goal. Thank you for writing it so beautifully

[@RevelSix]

Well said, thank you for this ❤️

[@xesilon]

i like this

[@rishabsrivatsa8606]

i don't think you understand what killing your sense of self means but yea "killing your sense of self" means you understand your identity and self comes from the direct accumulation of experience and it's basically your reactions n thinking trained by what happens to you so your self isn't something you are locked into, its like this steady state set of things like a ship of theseus which is always dynamic, and when you learn to live without fear and can be in the moment - and go further, create things in your life like you speak of, you're living in this causal plane without ego centrism cuz you see how things actually are and how you actually exist as a focal point of awareness in this space do you get what i'm saying? the goal you speak of involves "killing your sense of self" or whatever. it's seeing that your identity is basically your "ego" which is what i described above

[@Onkruid]

Oh hell yeah, another rock to push up on a sunday morning

[@InfectedChris]

But I'm going to be the best rock pusher I can!

[@allyson--]

You are the rock

[@evank0385]

@@InfectedChrisyay absurdism lol

[@chriswilliams8159]

The relationship between thought and uncertainty is indeed tumoultous and rocky. We as humans are like kids stuck between the parents with a broken marriage, constantly fearing what lies ahead or rather how different things could potentially become.

[@caraboo_9543]

“Many people find it easy to exist, but only very few can truly live.”

[@BossBelsham]

Patiently waiting for “the fear of dying” counterpart. Not being able to see out my goals or ambitions to the best of my ability is alarming.

[@kyshim1247]

I don't understand, could you elaborate?

[@mcfuckinanotheraccount808]

@@kyshim1247 For me personally the way this felt familiar is that i often get frustrated at the fact that it feels like i don't have enough time to get as good as i wanna get and know as much as i wanna know about things i'm passionate about

[@danielrogers6862]

I fear dying improving myself because I have hiv I'm not gonna risk moving to a new city and being the next homeless guy that dies from aids

[@astros69]

I understand this comment with all my heart…

[@joshavery]

Looking at the fear of living through the psychedelics lens is fascinating. People can experience "ego death" while tripping; it's a complete loss of a sense of self. In this state, one is directly faced with the incomprehensible and absurd. The "goal" is to release your fear and live completely in the now, however insane it may seem or however helpless you may feel. That experience sounded a hell of a lot like you described any other moment, tripping or not. Living in the present is absurd and incomprehensible. It's hard to let go. But when you're able to, beautiful things happen.

[@raevenhagen]

Wow truuuue

[@LeakyOrifices]

I was watching this in the kitchen while doing some work and the part about sorrow for encountering the world “as it is” made me want to pause the video and let the point you were making marinate a bit. It made me think of how I got bullied relentlessly in school through the near entirety of my compulsory education years. Thinking about that made be have to confront the feelings I associate with that fact pretty head on and I cried a bit. Immediately as I was doing this, I realised the radio was on (y’know, just as idle background noise) and it was playing Mambo No. 5. I immediately found the contrast of the situation very funny and laughed while crying at the absurdity of this meta-meta situation I experienced just as I was watching a video on this whole schtick. This is the kind of human experience I want to etch into my very being. Just these little things that contrast deep, absurdly meaningless suffering and make such things a bit easier to live with.

[@thalissacarvalho4109]

you got me laughing (respectfully lol)

[@bruitdefond]

This capacity to wonder at trifles - no matter the imminent peril - these asides of the spirit, these footnotes in the volume of life are the highest forms of consciousness, and it is in this childishly speculative state of mind, so different from commonsense and its logic, that we know the world to be good. - Nabokov

[@architchoudhary4782]

That happens to me too: I'll be crying one moment, mourning every aspect of my existence, and then I notice something so funny I can't help laughing out loud. It's quite interesting.

[@proof-xx1vv]

so that's why it feels so good after an intense workout session! i get into this state of almost zero thought and 100% observation. I become a lens in some sense in whih information simply flows through my senses withouth being interpreted or become muddied down by my own thoughts of the past. It feels amazing. And since i have intrusive thoughts (pure-OCD) that vanish after the workout session the contrast is even more stark. i don't feel fear, i don't feel anxiety but i feel only awe and true calm. This video summed what i have been trying to explain to my friends for the past three years.

[@satejpatil875]

Yup bro that's that

[@user-qb4on2qm7z]

The thing holding me back in my journey I found to simply be myself. My own beliefs about myself and my beliefs about myself in relation to others. For the longest time one of my main beliefs was that I am worthless and deserve suffering and deserve to never be loved. Its all about how deeply you believe something. The world is made of pure consciousness and by simply imagining it and accepting it your world restructures itself to meet your beliefs. Every bad thing that has happened to me was necessary for me to get to this point.

[@alexandersomera9974]

The way that you are able to guide viewers from the foundations of western philosophy into the possibility of sincere psychological transformation is fucking remarkable. You have such a gift and it is wonderful that you are so willing and able to share it. Thank you.

[@_def_not_am4613]

These videos remind me to take a step back and take a breath, they are like a passing butterfly in that sense - something that you must focus on focusing entirely on in order to enjoy it.

[@L9-Mi]

Thanks bro! This is kinda how I’ve been feeling for the past month… 😢

[@datardi]

bruv watched the vid on 12x speed 🤣

[@Ten_Thousand_Locusts]

​@@datardilmaooooo

[@L9-Mi]

@@datardi 100x speed

[@johnson_934]

same no idea what doing in life LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOO

[@jakeblackwell123]

I love your videos man but sometimes it’s really hard to watch them. It takes so much out of me emotionally. Regardless I love it and I love you!

[@r3i960]

Its fuckin hard to understand and keep up.

[@thederpydude2088]

​@@r3i960 The topics are thought provoking, but I do feel like I would have to rewind and ponder the ideas to really understand the point. Though I wish I understood it immediately a bit more intuitively, it's still kinda fun to think it over and figure some things out myself.

[@lashersq2901]

A weird thing is happening with me I'm afraid of not working everytime, not being productive everytime. Also, when I feel too happy, I doubt if it's actually right because I've not achieved everything that I want in my life till now. It is a weird feeling and is a barrier between me and my urge to live life being alive by enjoying every moment..

[@lmzaadi]

I’m just a fan, you didn’t have to make a whole video just for me. I’m honored 🥺🥰💐

[@yatsuu_39]

dude how are all your vids perfectly timed with whatever i’m feeling at any given moment?? fantastic videos btw keep it up 😁

[@kyubeyo]

Fr tho

[@deanmilos4909]

Increased heart rate Rise in blood pressure Secretion of adrenaline A feeling of restlessness The feeling of a weight inside your abdomen Hypersensitivity Sped up tought creation Irrational thinking When the symptoms of both Fear/anxiety and excitement/mania are so similar. One isn't sure which he/she is feeling anymore , they feel 2 completely different things as the same . And when both anxiety and excitement , and both mania and fear feel the same. One becomes afraid of his own heart beating because to them that means bad things are happening . And when you are afraid of your own heart beating fast , then you truly become afraid to live .

[@josha618]

Memories broken

[@deanmilos4909]

@@josha618 THE TRUTH GOES UNSPOKEN

[@ClintStone-t9m]

@@deanmilos4909 you do be chokin'

[@megabeetlejuicer96]

when you realize bad things are not actually happening, then the illusion breaks and you are free. but you have to break free from the past now. and you are ready.

[@theguyprincecharming1121]

@@deanmilos4909 I EVEN FORGOTTEN MY NAME

[@redgreen2453]

Im not afraid of dying or being forgotten, I’m afraid of being punched or people thinking I’m stupid

[@tylerdurden-ch8ip]

That is easily avoided. The latter, not so much

[@yureikertia6940]

Pain is temporary. Time will pass anyway. It's up to you to decide if that really matters to you in the grand scheme of things

[@cooperriehl944]

Some people believe fear and anxiety protect us from being punched. I look at it the other way - fear and anxiety prevent us from being able to choose whether we want to be punched or not.

[@redgreen2453]

@@cooperriehl944 kinky

[@RandomCatFromFrance]

​@@yureikertia6940 Oh no Oh no How did i get to this point How did i get to the point where this sentence, that calmed so many, cause such despair on me? Maybe it's because what i think is completely, absolutely and utterly irrational? Maybe if i did it I'd have wasted my existance Or maybe it's because it is true And if i avoid it I'd have wasted my existance? What i feel could be easily cured with a present i've already received.

[@mridul407]

the fact that you post videos about the thoughts that haunt me in the recess of my mind makes me really appreciate you. Though I am too afraid to look into my shadow for an answer you give a rope/make a way to begin that journey. Thanks sisyphus.

[@phylippezimmermannpaquin2062]

Im scared of spending my time doing new things only to have it all wasted. Im terrified of wasting time. I can enjoy doing nothing but i recoil at the idea of wasting time

[@Yourunit]

me

[@CreativelyJake]

i was just LISTENING to the video for the first minute and i tab back in to see *his* face at 1:04. what a jumpscare

[@CallumBruceBell]

Every aspect of this is beautiful - the music, the video aesthetic, the cartoons, the philosophy, the citations, the emotional content, your gentle narration. You do great, helpful work. Thank you.

[@sangitachaudhary-rs5in]

Man this channel is a gold mine, love these esaays.

[@davidblackwell614]

Love this ❤ my only addition would be a line on how Grief and sorrow are the shadows of love and joy; they arise together, out of each other. Would fit nicely to support the hard to counter intuitive point you’re making,

[@michaelchen2718]

From the very first second of this video you see the perfect balance of depth and comedy.

[@ethanwood2934]

A man who let’s all things flow in, through, and out of himself is the only man to have truly lived for he has touched the universe more than any other soul.

[@TheKosmotect]

If you view the world as it is you realize you can't get lost. The path was never there.

[@kani-licious]

Wdym? Lots of people think as if there is a path to take, especially the well-adjusted ones.

[@sniffxy]

bro that sounds depressing stop😭

[@alice_so_kattish5445]

Your videos always come at the perfect time, as if you know exactly what I’m feeling.. I’m glad to know I’m not alone.

[@danieldalton]

Thanks for this one Sis ❤

[@brayd890]

Why do you get to comment 10 hours before the video comes out

[@amaan06]

@@brayd890 because he scheduled the video.

[@uzulim9234]

this really resonated with me, thank you. i realised that i can love freely, but in a way that is full, healthy, and responsible.

[@MDrummKid2]

this channel is severely underrated. Such concise and thought provoking content. Not going to lie sometimes even just seeing the title/thumbnail causes me anxiety, because I know that what's about to happen when I click the video is that I confront myself or maybe even hear words which express or explain the feelings and the fears which I so desperately try to repress. But I force myself to watch anyways because I know that I need this, so thanks for helping open all of our eyes!

[@vincentpomerleau6865]

You ve made me realise a patern ive never seen about holding on to sorrow. Thank you ill try keeping myself in check

[@flavertex658]

This comes to me at an auspicious time, in which just this exact issue is the forefront of my thought and living. Thank you deeply.

[@jagsjags9695]

Im weak but i want to be strong to help those around me but im scared of the world around me

[@RandyWasJustHere]

@@jagsjags9695 Same

[@Jabjabs]

Always great to see Ram Dass making an appearance. I love his style of "Be here now" followed by what is essentially "watch out for that because here is 500 ways it can drive you insane if you aren't careful." It is an angle that one can really appreciate, it shows how even those that look like they have it together have to keep an eye on how things are actually going.

[@cosmostardust5624]

I’ve had too much despair thinking about the scale of everything. Once I developed an apathy for all things in my life, I simply delude myself into thinking I don’t care. Whether this is a trauma response, or a protective measure, it forces me to do nothing (in the face of everything I’ve ever wanted).

[@cosmostardust5624]

Having anxiety all my life, eventually broke me some way. Hearing all this, I relate to it, but only in the terms of my past self. Anything that happens is blocked from eliciting emotion from me by the wall of apathy I built with the hopes of protection, and a sense of caring about specific things and not others. But that’s not how it ever turns out. The apathy is too proactive, ruining my joy and progress. I am depressed and unhealthy because of a lot of things in my life, not least of all, me. I fear that nothing will ever change while actively doing nothing. If only things could change..

[@kkounal974]

I never understood why people feel despair about the scale of everything. Am i not ambitious enough, or have i made peace with it a lot sooner than most people? I just don't get it.

[@hamcoon817]

This came at a weird timing in my life. thank you Sisyphus, watching your videos help comfort me in my worst moments.

[@ElJorro]

The algorithm has blessed me as this video nails exactly how I feel. Thank You.

[@isaisisx]

i cant seem to get over this feeling

[@Aventura_19]

Same

[@nikhilpatro6376]

Suprised and also happy to see that it is not just the western Philosophers but many Indian Philosophers who are helping to propagate the Indian philsophy and in the meantime seamlessly blend in with those of western ideas. The video in itself is a masterpiece! Love it!

[@tealwave77]

Sisyphus55 will always be my favorite KZbinr

[@LibertyScholar]

So happy to hear you talk about Krishnamurti! He's one of my favorite thinkers. I recommend his book "The First and Last Freedom" with an introduction by Aldous Huxley.

[@415play]

Thank you I needed this video right now. I’ve recently graduated and I feel so afraid to steer off into a new path. I feel comfortable where I’m at, but I’m not exactly happy. And I’m afraid of what would happen if I were to begin a new career.

[@arii69420]

i fear my contemplation on everything you said now and thereafter will all have just been but a thought as i miserably continue to live vicariously, all too aware of how weak i am for realizing this and not taking any action. every week passes before i'm able to grasp at the courage to truly live and i'm afraid that before i know it, i'll be standing having the same thought 20 years later.

[@dimosthenistserikis5901]

To die is to simply live without a future…. That’s deep man, great work keep it up!

[@joshkostek5037]

Every upload from this guy in the past 3 weeks has directly pertained to my life and I have no idea why and no clue how I stumbled upon it but I’m here for it

[@Aventura_19]

Why was I ever born... I lack so much faith I hate life rn and am now even more terrified of the thought of me going to hell and staying there forever... Even worse! It's all hopeless

[@redgreen2453]

It’s not the meaninglessness of the struggling that gets me down, I’m ok with meaninglessness. It’s the struggling that gets old

[@mjgeolin6956]

THIS but i’m struggling with time as well

[@zanzacool2618]

this was a great video, amazed by the quality that you've been putting into these lately. keep it up!!

[@conely2463]

For some reason, I am compelled to believe that there is some explanation for why things end up being engaged with finding certainty in the uncertain. I think about whatever fundamental mechanisms lead to the dawn of enzyme and protein formation, to societies erupting in sciences (where the most convincing things are conjured; certainty is explored) throughout history, to Einstein's reluctance to entertain the idea of fundamental uncertainty as necessary for physics. I'm not well acquainted with Hegel, but it feels so intriguingly accurate of 'spirit' trying to understand itself, except it is not just humanity but a recurrent pattern that emerges somehow from the physical laws we're discovering through science. Btw, I am an uncertified curious boi and only wish to verbalize my imagination here. I just like imagining there being satisfying explanations that explain as much as possible, irrespective of scale. I started writing this comment though, because sometimes all the certainty we perceive, sometimes just goes away. We can be grappling with certain things in our lives where we are tasked with predicting things from what we know. From this, however, we abstract away, and we ask so many questions which zooms us out of the mapping of our conceptualizations. We start asking things, like "What's the point?", "What's next?", "Is this truly justified by our values?", and then we find ourselves having gone from an almost tangible amount of certainty to trying to wade through a viscous and unmaneuverable river of uncertainty. Feeling this recently, I felt hopeless and couldn't even justify finding hope. In the end, I just felt sorrow for the people who couldn't bear for me to stop existing. I truly don't know how to fully justify my existence to others or myself. Every concept, every pattern of thinking, every idea or rhetoric, it was all so easily dismissed and equivalently as justifiable and unjustifiable as anything that preached its antithesis. I currently have no answers. It just seems that you need to blind yourself to the limitless uncertainty that propagates through having a mind that is too open. You can always perceive everything under the guise of certainty or uncertainty. Sure, you know many patterns, but is knowing these things worth it? Is it meaningful? Does each thing you think about have utility in having a morally justified life? And you can do the opposite: Sure, you may never know what's next. You may never find anything objectively meaningful. You may never be able to accomplish anything morally justifiable. But you can be quite certain of these limitations of your cognition. You exist on this timeline. You must exist as a product of all the yesterdays. Mathematics itself may always have statements we cannot determine are true, prove are true, or decide if it's possible to prove. However, mathematics is still what it is and is still about as rigorous as it gets. You can be convinced of just about anything. The universe itself doesn't change based on any of your thoughts, emotions, or experiences. You experience change sometimes when there may be none. But you know that whatever comprises the root of your life such that you exist to experience only your body and mind, must mean that every human (or non-human) was borne of their body and mind to experience their respective body and mind, through the same process. I don't know what else to write. I'll just be done here.

[@IFYOUWANTITGOGETIT]

Find something in the world to put in order. Something manageable. Something that feels possible. Believe in yourself, that you have the ability to make it so. Figure it out. Put the pieces together. Find your purpose and meaning in battling with the entropy of the universe. Smile as Sisyphus did, knowing his actions would be ultimately meaningless but that his actions would inspire others to take the souls of the gods that cursed him.

[@insignifikant]

Been in a depression week and this video popped up in my recommendations. What a coincidence.

[@xMXWLx]

our ideas of living has been co-opted and the connotation of living comes with some kind of work or struggle that we already know is ahead, all the time.

[@Ionneedlove]

Without fear life is meaningless - Wise Man

[@MoreFootWork]

Thank you for this reminder

[@amour_deliah6314]

"FEAR IS OUR ATTEMPT TO CONTROL SORROW"

[@Catthepunk]

I'm battling this fear to live rn. I didn't realise as clearly how afraid of allowing myself to feel my overstimulation fully, that i ended up burnt out and scared of confronting people in challenging times. I only realised this clearly today when i did a meditation for releasing emotions i can't label, by this youtube channel called The Mental Level.

[@joshshergill2]

i love your videos bro don't stop

[@pedropalacios9346]

Been binging your videos, and this one hit the hardest!

[@corduroycal]

Your “on su****” video really helped me reflect on my personal struggles and thoughts. I think about it often. Thank you

[@williamwoolf8072]

death is simply to live without a future

[@Pyarilovely]

"To die is to simply live without a future, without a tomorrow. To find out what it means to die is to live without fear " ~Krishnamurti

[@eric_grossman]

This was exactly what I needed to investigate today. Thanks dude, fantastic work

[@Honzis08]

Hey sisyphus 55 I just wanted to say that I like your videos a lot and appriciete it so much also you have so nice voice! Please dont stop posting

[@wild_cub_times]

This way of thinking was so new to me that I had to watch this twice to really get it ':D well done!

[@heckinhey]

Sisyphus 55 is my andrew tate

[@georgepliskin5199]

To live without future... This is one of those things i want to learn someday. A hard lesson indeed, but a crucial one to live life fully.

[@labbra444]

"find out what it means to die is to live without fear"

[@Yourunit]

im too tangled up in my own mental to ever be able to live i guess, woulda been cool to have it like my brother, it all seems to come so easily to him

[@owlman135]

You always put out videos of what im and seemingly a lot of other of people are feeling right when they can hear it. Love seeing a Ram Dass quote, would love to see a full vid from you on him!

[@donaldquirk7801]

I forgot about this channel. I'm so glad I found it again.

[@TheRealTomWendel]

Fear arises from aversion to an uncertain future. It might go the way one hopes, but it might not. Embrace that uncertainty, and fear fades. It will never go away, since the mind is always calculating risks and benefits. So losing fear is a relative position, not an absolute one. The goal shouldn’t be to eliminate fear but to reduce its dominance in the present state- allowing one to be more present and live more freely and fully.

[@danieljohnson941]

Reminds me alot of the quote about old world blues from New vegas

[@Fear_Therapy]

This is the kind of fear that not everyone is aware of but deep inside they have this. 😢

[@mariAAAAAA_r]

I've already commented, but whenever this feeling strikes the only thing that's left it's this unanswerable question Why? And in that tiny, tiny word my mind spirals It drills a hole on my brain, feeling the turbulence all over my body Unable to move, do anything Why live, why die, why laugh, why cry My thoughts disappear, only the sensations are left as I physically feel them I still can't practice the solution

[@aliasanew3398]

Nah facts though. And sometimes I feel like is it up to me to figure out THE answer? Why is it always up to me? Why do I feel like I’m the only one ever trying to find a solution? The only one who cares. But ofc that can’t be true… Right?

[@mariAAAAAA_r]

@@aliasanew3398 Bro true It feels like everyone else has their life together and you're stuck there with these plaguing questions that you gotta find the answer somehow And y'know that doesn't matter where you go or what you do, this feeling follows you, even if the greatest thing happens It sucks, doesn't it?

[@aliasanew3398]

@@mariAAAAAA_r Sucks is an understatement

[@shadowsironicch.]

Why there needs to be a why? Nah for real though i think its just a process in which your mind challenges you, making sure you take a rest in life, hence the paralysis, the thing i did is just remind myself there is no reason for things as my own brain gave me those reasons as a human necesity for some sense. As for the other comment people around you probably will experience the same in a few years, its like growing up before your classmates, maybe a little akward but it evens out over time. At last i assure you there are people who relate to you that have overcomed this, but you gotta do it in a healthy way, as i see you now you seemed to be digging your own tomb, so just a friendly reminder that "Every breath spend on figuring out some 'higher truth' is a breath not spend on living."

[@mariAAAAAA_r]

@@shadowsironicch. I'm happy you seemed to find a way to live with this, as you said, healthily Times are especially tough right now so I'm gripping hope with all my strength. But, just like water, the more you grasp it the less you have Thank you for the kind words, I hope everyone in this thread is doing okay. If not I wish you get through it safely.

[@slamjam2221]

your videos are very calming to listen to while reading

[@martianwildfowl7166]

Found this at a powerful moment. Great stuff!

[@BryanMotives]

was just looking for something to watch before sleep

[@meditate_ssbu]

Really needed this today, thanks Sisyphus55

[@yhamez]

I’ve always been afraid to live, so I don’t really know how to at this point. We screw ourselves up good.

[@CarmineKar98K]

I wish I was able to not care so much, somedays I wish I didn't have emotions so that I could live more, I've been hurt so much that I live in fear of everything even myself, I wish I was able to love myself and I honestly wish I could be everything people believe me to be, I don't want to feel incapable but as it stands I've been broken and I am wasting my life in self sabotage not living, it's almost like suicide to be like this.

[@mula070]

i wish i did care more, i feel like my family thinks i dont love them when i do deep down. recently ive been having manic epsiodes and im not sure if i can pull myself to go to a therapist. i feel empty, thanks for sharing ur story or feelings or yk…

[@justinolm]

Im a new suscriber I want to say that this format inspire me to maybe some day express my opinion on the internet in this way but in spanish. Love your content!!!

[@muhammadruzbianvari106]

why tf do u know what's on my mind dawg good vid

[@melimelz4948]

This was beautiful. Thank you ❤

[@monatooo]

i really felt the double taps on the endless sequencer lol but really great video, the whole creation from start to finish but not boring! very nice, with most op1 jams i loose track of what the person playing is actually doing :l

[@nekaylasmith]

This is so very humbling.

[@Maxence-dh7mn]

8:29 baby don’t hurt me

[@nathannationwide5549]

Amazing video as always and even better timing. Somehow you always do this.