Sounds like she was scaring her daughter more than the dog was.. Full story in related video ^^

[@jessicake92]

What a dramatic mother. Instead of saying "I won't let it hurt you." She should have said "it's a nice doggy, and it's trained to stay with her."

[@kellyprobst3533]

Mom missed an opportunity to show her frightened daughter how dogs are useful and life saving . She just fed into the kids fears

[@KCsFunHouse]

Came to the comments to say exactly this!

[@Ellie-sf5bn]

Or created the fears in the first place

[@richkarter1916]

sometimes that doesn’t always work, though, i’m talking from experience, just telling someone “get over it it won’t do anything to you” and exposing them to the thing theyre that scared of will make the fear worse and last longer

[@fulltimeonfire8536]

It's more likely that the kid isn't even afraid, the mother just doesn't like dogs and is using her kid as an excuse to get what she wants

[@laurafaehnrich4261]

Saying to a child, look this dog is over there is won't come here. I know you are afraid but there is no reason. Everything is fine that dog is Trained ans will not leave OP child's side because [explaining how cool a guidedog is] Is way more helpful than I won't let the dog hurt you, insinuating that the dog is a thread and something to be afraid of. And different than "get over it" Depending on the age of the child, the fear might just come from something new My cousin was afraid of dogs when he first met mine but then his mother went on the ground with him next to the dog and showed him that there is no thread Sometimes kids are scared because they don't now something. Sentences like these are not helpful.

[@RebeccaPeacock-lq8dw]

Your daughter needed to be alerted to any life threatening diabetic complications. The dog was vital to her safety.

[@_Cayla]

Service dogs are legally considered MEDICAL EQUIPMENT. Asking for the removal of the SD is the same thing as saying someone doesn’t need their walker/wheelchair/etc. Her 4 year old’s fear won’t potentially lead to fatal situations, the removal of the SD very well could. The mom should’ve used this opportunity to show her daughter that dogs are good rather than feeding into the child’s fear.

[@gabriellesummers1426]

That is definitely a teachable moment lost

[@brencislloyd9517]

Okay as someone who had a very extreme dog phobia as a child, that mom did the absolute wrong thing to help her child. Dog phobias are real and yes, most people treat them as not real, which is a big problem and leads to repeated retraumatization. But none of my dog related trauma EVER happened with a service dog, in fact, seeing a service dog doing its job calmly and being friendly can even HELP. What DOESN'T help is reminding your small terrified child that a dog has the potentiality to hurt them. Trust me, your child with a dog phobia is well aware of that fact. Sitting on the other side of the room was good but saying "You see how that dog helps your cousin and is calm?" THAT would help. I feel so bad for that kid with a dog phobia, theyre going to have to heal from that all on their own with no help :( maybe seeing that service dog, who is calm and well trained, more regularly will help but i doubt their mom will let that happen :(

[@imscanon]

After a dog attack, I'm very uneasy around any dog over knee high, esp if I'm standing, so I get it, however, if the dog is wearing a service vest, I'm totally fine as I know it's well trained and will not jump on me. That was an awesome opportunity for the Mom to show her daughter the difference between a service dog and a regular dog. The dog owner could have explained that effectively and helped the kid get over part of her fear. I have no fear reaction whatsoever for service dogs.

[@edenstanding8676]

As someone who is actually allergic to dogs and can be triggered with asthma quite badly... I would never ever let that dog leave. If it was an Emotional Support Dog I'd have no problem sending it away, but a diabetes dog?!?! Come on!!! That's unhinged.

[@peytonelizabeth]

I think public situations with dogs can be complicated but trained service dogs is a totally different story. Especially considering it’s monitoring her diabetes and presumably she’ll be eating so a change in her blood sugar is quite likely.

[@a.b.2850]

As a mom to a child with a service dog for 10y, I don’t care for the emotional sensitivity of pple that show none to us. I will always advocate and protect my child over anything else, especially over pple’s feelings. That’s how I learned to roll over the years, or we would have no life and my kid would’ve had more negative experiences than positive ones. I won’t allow that. If you’re a jerk, I’m a jerk. It’s not being petty, it’s matching to their level of disrespect and behaviour, and unfortunately, I’m great at this. Protecting the dog from pple’s stupidity is protecting our child. We regularly have to put ourselves between our child and pple’s hostility, while staying graceful in front of our child for who we need to remember we’re at the same time modelling what are socially appropriate responses and behaviours. We have to stand up and put ourselves between our kid and those horrible and nasty pple coming at them, for our kid’s safety and to defend their fundamental rights, sadly way more often than we really should. If we don’t, one day the child will become either depressed, disconnected from their service dog, or worse, no longer wanting to have a service dog. That’s why I have no hesitation whatsoever to put these pple back in their place, politely if they are, or aggressively if they are. Most importantly, my son sees that his mom has his back, she doesn’t hesitate to take a stand for him when it’s needed, no matter who it is, they can be 6’4” 250lb, he knows his mama bear does not care, and will, as he’s witnessed, do whatever it takes to get these pple off his back. It’s important for him to know that.

[@lisakp71]

That dog is a medical device, period. Thats the same as asking them to remove her dexcom or leave the insulin at home. Mom sounds like she was the one with a problem. Acting as if the dog would otherwise harm her daughter if not for her presence was fully instigating issues. Sitting calmly at a distance and saying, "see how gentle the doggy takes care of Reece? Shes her friend" would serve everyone well, ESPECIALLY her daughter.

[@zigscha]

Saying “I wont let the dog hurt you” when it’s a literal service dog is only making the kids fear 100 times worse. How about you teach the kid the basics of respecting animals or looking for the right signs to stay away instead of putting into their head that all dogs are bad and dangerous. Probably the mom’s fault a 4 year old is so scared of dogs in the first place.

[@ACCER]

1- HEALTH/SAFETY is ALWAYS more important than "comfort." 2- How did a 4 year old become "deathly afraid" of dogs??? That sounds like a parenting fail of some kind....like the mother was afraid/doesn't like dogs and taught her daughter to fear them.

[@funkyducky8751]

NTA. The other mother and sister however are! Wtf? The girl needs the dog to help SAVE HER LIFE! The depths of some peoples ignorance never ceases to amaze me.

[@donnasessom7533]

No way would go thru unnecessary changes for a service dog.

[@richkarter1916]

someone with a lifelong death fear of dogs here: not the asshole, the kid can hang out in places the dog isn’t and also service dogs tend to be mellow and know enough to not jump around someone when that persons stressed out

[@tracim3080]

Well, the dog is preventing your child from dying so that’s kind of more important than preventing drama, so no, you shouldn’t take the dog home to avoid drama

[@AstridMcArthur]

You checked ahead of time. I think you did your duty. The host clearly didn't check with her guest. You had a valid reason for the dog being there. The kid may have trauma from an interaction with a dog, so be considerate. The reality is that dogs have attached people and even their owners.

[@BrodieMillar-d5v]

What a shame for that child... talk about a teaching moment. 'Not all dogs' Listen buddy, some dogs are scary, I get that, but fido is a special dog! He was raised especially to be the best kind of dog for my daughter, and that means he'll never ever hurt anyone. You don't have to go near him, and he won't leave my daughter's side so as long as you stay from her, he won't come.near you but if you want to come say hello that's OK too because he's 'on duty' and will just keep doing his job.

[@jfm5949]

Why is this the option ? Tell the mother with the frightened kid to go home !

[@bonniewood5263]

I agree with foregoing comment: that other cousin should be educating her daughter, not fostering fear. Some people always need drama and need to make it about THEM.

[@lauramiller7690]

NTA if she had some other medical device a wheelchair a walker whatever that the child was uncomfortable with they wouldn't ask you to remove it this animal is a medical necessity not a pet and her telling the girl I won't let the dog hurt you add to her fear she should have told her it's a nice dog it won't bother you the cousin handled this all wrong

[@ritterboyz5634]

How everyone can avoid the drama, educate yourselves and stop saying stupid idiotic shit😮❤ so glad that’s how she would like to be treated if that was her and that situation❤

[@crystalmichaud3716]

Um, no. If she needs that dog for diabetes then absolutely no. That dog is trained to detect her blood sugar, heartbeat, and other medical issues. She needs to teach her child about these things and not be that deadly afraid of dogs. It's not like it's a snake or spider, and I can see if her child is deadly allergic to dogs. But not deadly scared of them. Just keep her away and not bring on more anxiety by saying those condisending things like that dog is vicious or something.

[@Googleisyourfriend.]

Nta. I don’t acquiesce to peoples dog fears. No matter who you are or where you live you are going to encounter dogs out in public so you will just have to find a way to get over it or go home and hide. The world doesn’t revolve around your neurosis.

[@chellem4567]

Absolutely not! The dog is a wking dog. It is doing a job for a child that needs it due to health issues. Is another parent not going to allow a kid to use a walker or wheelchair bc their kid is afraid of them? Not only shouldn’t she but i think it might be against the law to demand it. 🤷‍♀️

[@Catwomin228]

Mom should have done better to teach her daughter not to fear dogs. Most are friendly, and those that are not, get triggered by fear and negative reactions.

[@terriebtsOT7]

So it's okay to not frighten one kid but put the life of the other kid at risk?

[@willowsent]

No your not your daughters health comes first you’re protecting your daughter

[@roxanne4746]

Does this mother of the child with the phobia never take her child to the park or out for a walk? I don't understand. Definitely NTA. That being said, as someone who lives with POTS, blood pressure problems, other heart problems, seizures, vertigo, asthma, COPD, and other problems as well as a history of uncontrolled diabetes, there are so few instances where they can be of help that I will mention after my explanation. They can only do the bare minimum. They're not completely useless, but what we need as disabled people is a caretaker/family member or friend. If no one is available, then some things need to be avoided until someone can help. ESPECIALLY diabetes! Thank God that's not the case with this story, but it is with many. The dog can not provide insulin or food! By the time a person with diabetes is faint, it's been far too long without insulin or food. I have family members and friends with all types of diabetes. Doctors will not let you out of the hospital if you are doing poorly enough to pass out despite doing everything you've been told to do by a doctor. Good on the mother with the diabetic daughter for asking for permission to bring the service dog! Most people do not. The ones that don't and the people that treat it like the dog is a life or death decision when humans are what we need is what's wrong. No one as unwell as we are should be without another human being. Especially if there's any fear at all about it being life or death. **As I mentioned earlier; Service dogs are great in situations where you're alone, sure that it doesn't affect anyone [phobias do not count!], and when you're out for a walk or at home. Waiting for someone to be available to accompany you in a closed space where others with allergies combined with breathing problems can be affected is a small price to pay to not hospitalize anyone. I just had to say my piece because too many commenters are acting like the problem with this story is the fact that it's a service dog. It's not. The mother was present with the diabetic daughter. She was safe. She just has a right to have the dog with her. It's solely the fact that the other mother is entitled enough to ask her to take the dog home because her 4 year old is scared of dogs. Especially because most kids have irrational fears at that age. Edited because typos

[@bobbiefrank5043]

No you're not in the wrong at all actually I would tell the cousin why don't you and your daughter go home if your daughter doesn't want to be around my sweet service dog. Furthermore the cousin the mother of the child is scaring her own daughter by saying I won't let the dog hurt you as if the dog is vicious and going to attack her;. She could definitely prevented her daughter's anxiety by telling her the dog is friendly

[@jamielee13188]

NTA

[@melisaarmstrong2293]

Nope at all

[@hippychick420]

Absolutely not. That dog is for MEDICAL problems. If you don't like the dog, you could leave. Seems the ah mom is causing the kid to fear dogs

[@alishiahampson3351]

Honestly I think the mum is saying that the kid is scared when in reality it's her that's scared but she knows if she said she was scared she'd be told to get over herself the dog is there to perform medical tasks like alerting ops child to her sugars getting too high/ too low

[@staceyd6475]

As a parent with a child that has a phobia of dogs…I feel for the parent and the small child in this situation because of how stressful it becomes. I do however think that it was unreasonable to ask for them to bring the dog home. Honestly, knowing that it was a service dog I would’ve used it as an opportunity for my kid to get more comfortable around dogs.

[@user-bx4ti6ig3i]

Same. I have 2 with dog phobias due to them being attacked when they were nearly toddlers.

[@brencislloyd9517]

As a former dog phobia kid, thank you for being a good mom.

[@Angela-ns8ux]

The mother absolutely made the situation worse antagonizing olivet by feeding into her daughter's fear

[@lilyplil1767]

The mom just validated her kid's fear instead of using this as a great teaching moment with a well-behaved dog to decrease the fear. It makes me wonder if the mom perpetuates it because it makes her feel important.

[@gregfawcett4043]

I had younger cousins who were terrified of my dog, (a medium sized mixed breed). So whenever they visited, the dog was banished to the basement. Of course, the dog thought he was missing something and barked constantly. Finally, my dad had enough so he gathered my cousins and called the dog over. Cousins screamed and cried but dad wouldn't let them go until they petted the dog. For the record, the dog was friendly and well trained. Finally, they petted the dog and accepted licks. By the end of the day, cousins and dog were playing together like litter mates.

[@gaylenewood7707]

👍🏻.

[@ElsaLisa-oc8hv]

It’s a form of bully. Ignore them.

[@whitneymccullough5230]

Not the a hole because its a service dog and they are trained to only mess with and focus on the child taking the dog home is wrong

[@epowell4211]

Some parents/guardians or so toxic they encourage fears, weaknesses, and lack of coping skills in the child so they stay dependent on them, and that's just disgusting.

[@totitelevisionshow]

mom could have literally been like “this dog won’t hurt you! this dog helps your cousin! see!” instead mom fed into the fear and now that toddler is going to struggle to get over that fear -someone who is horrified of big dogs,

[@RebeccaLunsford-qe2kt]

No your daughter's health is more important than your SILs lack of parenting.

[@erinwhitbeck1474]

Absolutely not your daughter needs her service animal

[@-.-4]

No!!! A child with diabetes! Her dog is considered medical equipment. She cannot be without her service dog! Federal law even protects service animals. I’m diabetic. Good for you!

[@jessicamarsh9779]

NO!!! NTAH

[@CCknows]

That's literally asking him to chance his daughters life because their cousin was scared. Total BS!!!

[@ajpm8133]

First: I'm confused. Is the child allergic or afraid? Second: The host said no allergies, no problem.

[@rochellethundercloud346]

NTA.that is an extensively trained service animal,not a random stray.

[@VictoriaRian]

That’s the same as saying, your insulin pump makes me uncomfortable, so take it out

[@campgirl6242]

The key word is service dog cousin can go to hell because the key word is service dog which means her daughter needs the dog there should be no excuses about that. I am tired of hearing stories about service dogs being kicked out of places this should not be happening!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@tranliemnguyen3429]

Nah, I’d just leave the party, service dog, daughter and all. Don’t have time for the histrionics of some neurotic, controlling mother who exacerbates her daughters fears. Thank the host for her efforts, but refuse to attend functions with too much drama Meg until she stops being such an ass.

[@MsGabriel1880]

People are nuts! 🥜 I would have said, no the dog is medical so if the dog can’t be there, then my daughter can’t be there either. Knowing how I am, I would’ve been straight forward with the other mom and told her, that this would be great exposure for the scared child. Does this child not go out in public?!?!

[@melissareid640]

Her Diabetic Service dog is a Medical necessity. It's like telling me I can't use my leg braces or walker. or a wheelchair user to level their chair at home. Your SIL should have defended your child and asked the other family to leave. Mae' can take a long walk off a short pier!

[@mollygrace3068]

My daughter is also deeply afraid of dogs, mostly from repeated encounters with off leash, wild, untrained dogs outside and in people’s homes from a young age. (I’m not a fan of most dog owners.) I still never talked to her like that. I’ve never even asked anyone to not bring their dog to places, even though a lot of people bring dogs around that definitely shouldn’t be. I would just sit near her and explain the dog is trained and won’t jump or bite.

[@MondliNgwenya.]

Theres a TTS voice that sounds exactly like her lol. This is who I'd imagine that voice would look like too

[@MeshelllChambers]

It's interesting that one mom thinks her daughter's fear is more important than her cousins life

[@ashleyburbank3129]

😅 no that dog is there for medical purpose and usually when people have service dogs for diabetes it's because their blood sugar drops quickly and it isn't always going to be easy to detect with machines that means I would not separate myself from my service dog ever... Or you could die. Diabetic comas and stuff are pretty common. If you have issues of that severity it's not okay especially

[@katiewilson7131]

No! The dramatic mother who was overreacting should have taken herself and her daughter back home! This was a teaching moment and she 100% failed as a mom!

[@beckyjones6172]

Next time someone asks you to take the dog home do 2 things. Agree, then your whole family starts to leave. When stopped and asked what your doing just reply in the sweetest, most innocent tone. What you asked. The dog is vital to keep my child alive so if he can't stay then I'm sorry neither can we. You wouldn't want anything bad to happen to my child would you and have a serious medical episode thats potentially fatal simply because her medical aid dog wasn't present to alert her to an oncoming episode. All over one person desire. Her child is important yes but so is my daughter and she needs her dog to live normally. So the choice is all of us or none of us. It wouldn't be fair to make her miss out on family things all the time with one or both of her parents just because she has a medical issue. I'm sorry if that inconveniences you. But to me my daughter comes first.

[@shaecox4028]

Sounds like May is afraid of dogs and had infected her child with it. "I'm not going to let it hurt you" instead of "it won't hurt you"

[@ruthrelyea7388]

Not the A-hole cause the dog is like life saving medical equipment and May could use this opportunity to help the child learn not dogs are bad and OP you should of insisted that it's her problem to NOT teach the child correctly

[@sabrinaholmes-jz6st]

What I'm wondering is was the kid really scared of the dog or th mom just need an excuse to be an a-hole/ controlling of a situation?

[@beedee7405]

That defeats the purpose of the dog providing service to the daughter. I’m not understanding why we’re here trying to feel out and be concerned about everyone else’s feelings and emotions when at the end of the day the service dog is for purpose. Why are we playing with that?

[@kymdagnall8344]

Why didn’t she take her daughter away from the situation as she was the only one with an issue. Also by feeding the child’s fear with her words wasn’t going to allow the child to calm down.

[@circesercy2190]

That mom has serious control issues. This a big sign of enmeshment. The fear was most like started by mom* as a form of control

[@pheonixchica5518]

When I heard the title I thought that the parent didn't like the dog and dropped it off somewhere and refused to bring it home, so glad I was wrong

[@poorlenore]

I've seen first-hand what diabetic shock can do to somebuddy I don't understand whyhy didn't realize that it's not just a dog it is a medical necessity

[@ashleymiskell7336]

NTAH in any way that mother just by using the sentence "I won't let the dog hurt you" implies that the dog had the intention of hurting someone which it did not that sounds like ignorance and honestly ridiculous nonsense how can grown adults act like that

[@ahhbee8298]

The dog is needed for medical purposes, the child is 4. I'm guessing the fear came from the mother. All she had do was teach her 4 year old this life, you will learn to get over it.

[@yukivermillion]

Nta, she should've told her daughter it's the nicest and best behaved dog in the world or something

[@tammybrooks1854]

May uses fear based parenting to get attention. The dog is a necessity for the child with diabetes. The host should have stood up for the kid with the dog because she said it was ok to bring dog.

[@Mandara1847]

The mother is making that kid afraid… Got you to wonder, who actually has the issues here!

[@angeliccow]

Service dog means daughters needs trump scared kid Mother could have used it as an opportunity to tech her child that dogs aren’t scary because asa medical alert dog that one is going to be super well trained and behaved

[@kimberlystripling4322]

There's actually laws for service dogs and if the child needs them for his diabetes then that is a true service dog and the other mom is actually making the child more scared of a dog by her own actions so she is setting that child up to fail

[@tamraleone-scott6038]

May needs to get a grip

[@Crowned_ladyd]

My kid could die soo no

[@robinlippy4799]

May is a huge ah.

[@stephanieledogar4471]

Sounds like a teachable moment. Life isn't always comfortable.

[@LeilaniTauheed]

?

[@eileenlaura50]

Nta

[@colinlamb4563]

NTA

[@promisedjubileedaniels]

NTA for sure. Diabetic alert dogs are life or death, a fear of dogs is not. That mom missed a vital opportunity to show her kid how dogs can be so helpful to humans. Lame.

[@nurseblacke9168]

Kid won’t get invited to many sleep overs

[@smgp2023]

glad the mom w dog didn't budge w her nonsense request. her kid is scared but that's something she can overcome and wont really get the kid killed, compared to diabetes! 😤

[@butterflygirl141]

It’s not a reckless or dangerous dog. It would be one thing to ask for a dog to be removed based on its behavior, but service dogs are very well trained and I imagine it was calm and would not go near the scared child.

[@nurseblacke9168]

WHY IS A LITTLE KID AFRAID OF A SERVICE DOG??? That’s weird

[@cniknik9863]

The 4yr of doesn't understand the difference between a service dog and a regular dog. That's the parents job to teach her and assure her she is safe. But they didn't

[@brencislloyd9517]

As a former dog phobia kid, it being a service dog doesn't turn off the phobia. A phobia is an actual mental health disorder btw. It's anxiety that latches onto something that traumatized us and then makes it worse. I used to cry seeing even the most well behaved dog walking in my direction. My phobia wouldn't have made the distinction between service dog or otherwise. But the things that did help me was people, my mother included, teaching me how not all dogs are like the ones who had attacked me. It didn't help me be less scared in the moment and my healing was very very slow because most people don't understand or believe that dog phobias are real or that their dog could trigger it. ANY dog can trigger a dog phobia. And in a four year old? Even more so. Asking the dog to leave was wrong because it was a service dog. And that mom reminding her kid that dogs CAN hurt her kid was also wrong and completely unhelpful. But the little kid is doing nothing wrong, she's just terrified from past trauma and unfortunately has a mom whose making it worse.

[@azshoppingprincess4298]

May needs to LEAVE with her spoiled Brat!

[@Areyoukidding621]

No the mother is the spoiled brat not the child. At 4 years old the daughter could/would legitimately be afraid of dogs, no doubt fed by the histrionics of her mother. Since the mother dropped the ball in alleviating her child’s fear, the man could have stepped into the teaching/consoling role and talked calmly and directly to the 4 year old about the good the dog is doing.

[@azshoppingprincess4298]

@@Areyoukidding621 I guess we can agree to disagree onthis one.

[@questioningcat7949]

yes