how to not get a divorce

[@VanshayMurdock]

I have no idea who you ladies are… but your video popped up in my feed today. Clicked on this and watched the entire 58:14. You got a new fan in me !! 🙋🏽‍♂️

[@stayinguppod]

thanks for hanging out :)

[@nkb420]

I definitely agree with the point on couples therapy being overkill. My partner and I went to couples therapy when our communication wasn't great. We got better at communication throughout the course of our sessions, but found that the focus on a fight or disagreement each week wasn't helpful. It felt like we'd be setting unrealistic goals to accomplish within a week or two weeks and then see the therapist and when XYZ wasn't completed, it felt like a disappointment or like we were failing. We had to take a step back and realize we were given the tools to figure stuff out on our own and could do that on our own pace instead of the pace that we felt was pressured by seeing a person weekly or monthly. So grateful for the time in therapy and the tools it gave, but I don't agree that therapy can *only* ever be helpful. It feels awesome now that we can solve problems on our own without being accountable to anyone but ourselves.

[@stayinguppod]

yes this!! i totally agree. it's all about opening up and understanding where your strengths and weaknesses are and developing the tools to handle things. you can get that from therapy, reading, workshops, whatever it may be. - c

[@sofiabessette7025]

i can't express how happy these lil weekly videos make me. i know i say it like every week but SERIOUSLY. luv u guys bad

[@stayinguppod]

love you!!!!

[@jnicmorris1]

The way I needed this entire episode omg

[@stayinguppod]

🤍

[@vslifeofcycles5415]

Minute 45:37 "how to raise your relationship satisfaction" I really liked this part. Going to write it down!

[@MegansFineFrenzy]

Guys ! Heads up, my wife and I had our first kid this year. He’s 9 months old now and the feeling you’re having now has been our existence all year because having a baby is A LOT 😅 Taryn’s I have always had the same fear as you and that fear will get worse if you don’t reel it in buddy ❤ it’s a mindset change for sure. Best of luck ladies !

[@stayinguppod]

congrats!! (and thank you for the increased fear) hahahah

[@rosemarybenoit5250]

Our pgt had 5 tested and 3 were perfect and 1 was likely to have a chromosomal issue and 1 was not viable. So you got this!!!! Wishing yall the best (we have 2 healthy baby boys 💙💙)

[@stayinguppod]

congrats!!!! oh my gosh this is so wonderful to hear

[@rosemarybenoit5250]

@stayinguppod thanks! We love following you guys and can’t wait to hear about all your future success!!

[@mollym169]

I loved your talk about the election. Especially since you guys are a queer couple it’s refreshing to hear you guys trying to understand the other side. I don’t think everyone who voted for trump is a bad person. Everyone has their own personal issues and their own reasons for voting for him. But you guys educating yourselves is very mature and honestly we should all have this feeling. But I obviously understand not everyone can get there.

[@ashleym3144]

Very much agree, and I voted for Trump. Not all of us are extreme or bad ppl and we all have our reasons for choosing the candidate of our choice. Here’s a little insight on how us Republicans feel and why. Yes, Trump is arrogant, a womanizer like most men, but the important issues for me were the economy and illegal immigration. I am a bisexual woman married to a man with 3 kids. When you have 2 working full time parents who are struggling to put food on the table and get by that overrules my thoughts on abortion and LGBTQ. As an almost 40 year old, I went from being able to enjoy and afford life to struggling and unfortunately the party in office will take the heat. Yes, I know Covid caused a lot of this not anyone’s fault. For abortion, I am Christian so am not for it, however, if there’s rape, incest, life/death of the mom, I 100% understand in certain circumstances. My other view is, ok I get it as a woman my body my choice but how hard is it for women to be accountable to prevent getting pregnant (we have numerous options to prevent pregnancy- we know we can’t depend on men for that). Being raised by Catholic Grandparents, I am about the principle. When it comes to trans in sports etc. I am sorry but if you are biological male but identify as a female, you shouldn’t be allowed in woman’s sports nor do I agree with them going in the same bathroom as my 11 year daughter and I am sure most parents agree it’s a no no. Many parents esp dads would agree and here in Louisiana. sports, just create a Trans Category- it’s a slap in the face to the women who worked hard at their craft to lose to a Trans sorry but it’s the principle of things. Make it fair, they need their own category. On immigration, if you come into a country illegally, you should not be allowed benefits, housing, etc. while we have Americans struggling and homeless Veterans- take care of your own ppl. You do it the correct way, and I have several friends from Mexico that are legal citizens. One note about Kamala, when that person mentioned God and she said you’re at the wrong rally, big shun from us Christians. Her policies were all fluff would mention them but never explain HOW. Russian evaded Ukraine right when Biden got in office because he saw a weak leader. No hate, bigotry, racism (Obama wasn’t a bad President except for the Obamacare). No racism, bigotry, etc just pure common sense Americans are struggling and we chose our wallets over our wombs

[@stayinguppod]

yeah we need to work on understand each other more and meeting people where they are if we want our thoughts heard. hopefully we can get there 🤍

[@melixerify]

I’ve been feeling so sad and scared since the election- thank you for making me feel even a little hope.

[@stayinguppod]

it's hard not to. i think it's important to take time for yourself and regulate and then we get back to it and start working for change now, not wasting 4 more years to start caring and trying to make a difference.

[@sunnc]

23:00 this is exactly what I’m talking about. I have a coworker who keeps hyper focusing on scenarios that I aren’t even that common or relevant. I’m like girl u just wanna complain & be outraged.

[@stayinguppod]

yeah i think politicians know how to get people hyped up so they shove irrelevant things at us to focus on and argue. i have no patience for it when it comes to protecting trans youth - c

[@louiseladegaard6177]

As a Danish PP, I felt so excited when you mentioned Denmark, haha :D we are not entirely socialist at all (I wish), buuut 100 x times more than the US

[@stayinguppod]

we love a danish PP!!

[@awkwardstars1928]

oh i’m EARLY EARLY.

[@stayinguppod]

early bird

[@InfiniteUniverse88]

Fred Durst wore a red cap before Trump. A line from one of his songs was "now this red cap gets a bad rap from these critics."

[@darrylann7561]

my girlfriend and i were co-workers to lovers🥰 we just made 4 years

[@sofiabessette7025]

how not to get a divorce was a major jumpscare btw lol

[@stayinguppod]

our apologies haha

[@dylanjohnson3346]

Be jamed cammyband taryn cuz i cant think of 2 people more perfect for eachother than you 2 lol ❤❤❤❤❤

[@stayinguppod]

❤❤❤

[@sarahdunne5077]

Sorry probs a silly question but why are you guys certain you’re only having a boy? love y’all!

[@stayinguppod]

we aren't certain! but doing IVF in america you are told the sex of the embryos and can pick which one to try first. we decided to try for a boy if any of the embryos are!

[@sarahdunne5077]

@@stayinguppodoh wow so exciting !

[@ailenleiva8379]

Argentina is absolutely NOT doing well under Milei's right wing policies.

[@monicanelson1231]

Genuine question. What identity politics did Harris run on?

[@Carriehammer718]

Cash is so dirty. My health anxiety doesn't like it lol

[@stayinguppod]

thats so fair!

[@goingforthegold]

is taryn a republic? when she said "there's so much chaos in every area of government, every area that they were running on"... say what??

[@louiseladegaard6177]

No, she's not

[@madaleeX]

She’s for Kamala

[@deloreshobson9289]

Didn’t know you had to be a republican to believe there’s chaos in our government.. lol

[@stayinguppod]

no, i think this part was her expressing trying to figure out what went wrong and how a lot of middle ground people ended up voting for trump. thats why she was sharing she has tried to consume other content to understand the other side better in order to have more productive convos -c