“STRONG" is NOT A Compliment 🙄🥱

[@erinl1225]

Black women ain't emotional punching bags... some of us aren't "strong".

[@Monrentho2008]

NONE of us are continuously strong, every human have their “moments” of strength, black women included.

[@angelofscorpio]

Thank you 👏🏾

[@lvjonjon215]

I’m sorry for calling y’all strong.

[@heykayrenee_]

Yes ma’am!! ☝🏾

[@xanthra592]

I need therapy lol TBH

[@dayum_mi]

I’m strong because I’m forced to be strong. Not because I want to be. I want to be soft. How I was intended to be

[@Nekole1]

I agree, I am with you.

[@QueenTici]

You're not alone, Sis. I'm KNOWN for my strength... that alone shows how many traumas I've survived. It's exhausting and spiritually draining, despite the wisdom that can be obtained from it. Blessings to you, and all reading. 💖 (Edited for a spelling error.)

[@4everlovemusic101]

@@imaginedatingdarkskingirls4930 This is a safe space, if you aren't looking to help, just leave

[@PrincessYonna1]

Yes when we are little baby girls we are soft and girly but we become conditioned throughout life and than it sticks with us and stuff like us being called strong and warriors will ingrain in us that we are some hero or strong being over other races of woman

[@maatgictrix]

💖Yes Ma.💖

[@buffytheinternetbullyslayer]

People forget black women are strong because they have to be not because they want to be. “Dying inside but outside you looking fearless “-Tupac

[@denicewms]

I want to 👍🏾this 100 times.

[@reasc2071]

That just brought tears to my eyes

[@audriiiiroberts3030]

@@reasc2071 me too..

[@LadyKane77]

Just imagine the state of the world if we quit.

[@fatudaniel7301]

Exactly

[@lisewagnac3623]

I'm really tired of this "strong black women" rhetoric that people throw around. I'm not strong 24/7, I'm sensitive, I have feelings, I express them and I cry in moments of anxiety and stress. Lets stop teaching young black women to suppress their emotions and be their emotional support. Let them express their feelings, let them be passionate, let them cry, laugh, dance. Let them have the full experience of being a woman.

[@blueiris1542]

Just because someone call you strong, doesn't mean you don't have feelings or not sensitive. Strong people can be sensitive as well.

[@crystalthesocialworker]

Yess girl.. I totally agree..

[@lvjonjon215]

I’m sorry For calling Y’all strong not knowing I am playing into a stereotype.

[@malibubliss8153]

Yes, you said it, “a full woman experience...” thank you 🙏🏾

[@jessicapetrino2254]

You’re human. We feel everything. Happy or sad. Weak or strong. You’re human. Black lives matter. & you’re beautiful, Lisa Wagnac. I liked your comment a lot & you’re allowed to feel any feeling you want, you’re human like any one else ‼️❤️ love from CT

[@highdefinition8261]

Notice how words like beautiful, gorgeous, happy, nice, funny are not being used.

[@kourtneydouthard-becker1501]

I seen a few, but baby, I can count on ONE HAND how many I seen in that post smh

[@divine2297]

Yep this is sad. They hate their own

[@bricastellanos7589]

Words like that would be used on a more personal level. Beautiful, funny and nice, are not generalized compliments.

[@alilrazzledazzle992]

Bri Castellanos Why is strong a generalized compliment then? That doesn't make sense. Beautiful can definitely be used generally...

[@TIAOFNEBULA]

i was really holding on to some hope to see those words not one time wow.

[@carta360]

This is why people bullied that poor little 17yr old girl that filmed George Floyd's video for not stepping up and fighting for Floyd. I mean she's SEVENTEEN and a GIRL and you were expecting her to fight off 4 grown armed men?! Really?! I was shook honestly

[@gdesiree29]

Ikr? And then u will hear men say "oh what did she do for that to happen to her?"

[@AKilahVamp]

I didn't know she was bullied. That's awful

[@chinaking918]

Girl meanwhile you can hear a black man in the video screaming not doing anything yet they expected her to risk it all 🤦🏽‍♀️

[@saladcaesar7716]

Carta 360 the police was a murderer! What can a teenager do in the face of a murderer who has power to kill you ?

[@christinem8799]

THIS!!!!!

[@lunagonzalez4976]

Idk calling black woman strong feels like it helps them justify the mistreatment bc black woman "can take it"

[@cachaygreen9641]

True shit!!!

[@gunslingah2]

EXACTLY!!

[@josedeleon3931]

FACTS!!!

[@isma7639]

If he praises you for being a "Strong Black Women" Run! he about to work your ass to death 😂

[@curlycurl8326]

😂 factssss

[@zaireacquaah9641]

Lol!

[@TheLovesnowangel]

Lol right! He’s gonna expect you to do everything so he can do nothing. It’s all a setup for laziness and not capable of being a real man.

[@kourtneydouthard-becker1501]

Lmboooooooo 😩😩😩

[@nc9802]

@RachLyna me too

[@livewell-xt5xr]

YOUR STRENGTH IS ONLY APPRECIATED WHEN ITS TIME FOR YOU TO BE THE MULE.

[@AstrogirlNessa]

THIS IS THE ONE.

[@jaesimpson425]

That touched my soul

[@mimia.4810]

They only ever notice us when we fighting the power for them.

[@livewell-xt5xr]

@@imaginedatingdarkskingirls4930 ask your mother that question

[@angelofscorpio]

This!

[@seyimajek]

I'm a black woman and I'm not strong but vulnerable🥴🤷🏿‍♀️ so tired of the strong black women narrative.

[@r.b7979]

Same

[@r.b7979]

@Rae Golden same

[@seyimajek]

Rae Golden Rae Golden being called ”white” for working and speaking correctly should be considered an insult instead because it's like they think that only white people are known for working hard and speaking properly when it totally not the case.

[@mimia.4810]

Exactly! I'm not strong tbh. I can't fight, my first instinct is to run, hide, and cry. 😭 There are plenty of black women out there who can't handle the heat. It's scary to know if a black woman is in need of help people will assume she can handle it because she's sTrOnG. 🙄

[@seyimajek]

Mimi A. Honestly it's sad how unprotected we black women are because of this toxic narrative😭

[@karminyates3261]

Notice how loving black women is about loving them and not actually loving black women.

[@DianaMillan]

Karmin Yates !!!

[@princessleah187xx4]

Right. It's like: What do you love about bw? Black males: I love how much they love us😑😑😑😑😑😑

[@The_Neighborhood_Oasis]

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@harlemsbaby9966]

Sis put this on a shirt and sell it !!!💯💯💯💯

[@TheLovesnowangel]

Karmin Yates right! If that’s not narcissism idk what is. Smh

[@amberpalmer3708]

Calling us “strong” is just giving them leeway to treat us badly because they know we can eventually bounce back from it. This is not an excuse to traumatize us and make us single mothers (for example)

[@blairsnitch97]

I’m a white girl and I can say with confidence that if this tweet was “white men what do you like about white women”, it would be cutesy stuff like “I love the way you guys twirl your hair or when you do X Y & Z.” I really doubt that strength and resilience would be a common answer. Eloho is right this tweet is grooming black women to tolerate stuff they shouldn’t have to put up with, such high expectations, and it casually de-feminizes them. Strong is a masculine word :/

[@serenitysbubble2384]

Preach

[@neo1053]

Agreed but strong is not a masculine word it is just a word

[@AlllSmiless]

@@neo1053 strength is definitely a measure of traditional masculinity. It goes along with the provider/ protector role

[@profaneinquest3785]

@@neo1053 I disagree especially in that context. It's like if someone asked to women what they liked about men and they answer something like I like men who are weak because it's easier to get along, I don't think men would take it like a compliment. I'm opposing strong->lean on to weak->easier to get along. I'm not saying that being weak is wrong but just that is not associated with masculinity (Actually majority of people don't like to be associate to weakness) but especially men and they would be the first to call out the women who like "weak" men. The same way strong is not associated with feminity. It doesn't mean that women have less value than men or less capable than men.

[@playablue]

.... same as they in regards to women or any black woman being feminine....; its a word. Geeez.. white suprmacy loves threads like this.

[@schadia1325]

I'm not strong, I'm sensitive and soft and feminine. I'm a woman.

[@eulywade9745]

Mmmm Mg huh? 🤔

[@deenaprice1524]

Sensitive, soft, and feminine is a kind of strength in itself. It means you got through this life without turning hard. It takes a lot of resilience to resist hardening.

[@שםשםמִשפחה]

But feminists want you to be strong , independent female.

[@librarianrose4472]

I wonder how different the replies would’ve been if he said: “Black men what do you like about *white* women. Black women come listen”

[@Alvinperth]

Not in this period.

[@missshannonsunshine]

Yessss I said something similar. That’s the post I need to see

[@CrystalLovesChrist]

Femmefatal “they have nice eyes” “They’re cute” “Feminine and sweet” “Talk nice and sweet” “Compliment us and love on us good” “They got a lil sum sum going on” “They ain’t got attitudes” “Their hair is real” “They’re just…better” I didn’t even bother scrolling through that thread bc I had NO hope in any black man there to give legitimate compliments on our femininity and beauty🙄🙄🙄 instead of our pain and suffering

[@TheeBratzDollxox]

I would’ve LOVED to have gotten a cackle out of the contrast in responses. The contradictories would’ve just lined up gracefully.

[@ImNotCallingYouALiar]

Marcellies Holland You completely missed the point. Of course this isn’t about white women. It’s about black men and their perception of black women which is sadly different from how they view other races. Black women are viewed as strong and can basically take whatever treatment is thrown at them. But other races are viewed as delicate, gentle, feminine, worthy of protection, etc. Black women on the other hand are required to be the protectors...

[@KhaosDancer]

I cried when I broke a nail. I cried when I got lost. My husband knows I'm NOT strong. He likes being my hero. Strong, my foot.

[@KhaosDancer]

@@soboom7350 I copied from Disney princesses and Marilyn Monroe movies...plus I was a daddy's girl until my father died. Back to the movies, and don't watch Princess and the Frog, these were ALL girls who were heartbroken over fake problems. "I don't wanna be a princess". Once you can cry about being a princess, you can cry about ANYTHING. Marilyn Monroe got what she wanted (in movies) without giving it up by being a sexy damsel in distress with a dash of bimbo. Being adorable and helpless in the right crowd will usually attract a stronger, usually chauvinist or traditional, male. At least in my experience.

[@missshannonsunshine]

Girl! Yes! I’ve never met a guy that shamed me for crying. Only family and friends do. I need a protector type.

[@KhaosDancer]

@@missshannonsunshine beautiful, you ARE going to get a provider male. When we can leave the house again, your beautiful self is going to slay in a sundress, be as fragrant as the flower you are...and "accidentally" drop something in an area where men of means frequent. The right man will pick it up, and you'll get your well-deserved, princess happily ever after.

[@Babygirl2986]

@@KhaosDancer I'm like you. I was a daddy's girl my whole life until he passed away. I feel like a damsel waiting for my knight in shining armor lol. I was my dad's little princess so whoever I date has some big shoes to fill.

[@MrsNicolas]

That's my finacé. It's sad that I had to search high and low for a BM that doesn't get upset at me crying, and doesn't take advantage of me or see me as weak for crying. I'm able to be vulnerable with him. He doesn't see me as strong all the time, he sees that I'm fragile, delicate, soft and feminine.

[@ayabaforever4970]

So getting beat up physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually is a compliment. No question mark because it's not a question it's a statement Um ahhkay. Ladies be safe. I LOVE YOU 💜

[@ayabaforever4970]

The dysfunction 🤦🏿

[@ayabaforever4970]

Either superwoman or sexualized us.

[@vanessathomas6999]

Love you too Sis😍😍😍

[@ayabaforever4970]

@@vanessathomas6999 😘😘🤗

[@lvjonjon215]

I’m sorry For calling Y’all strong , y’all shouldn’t have to be.

[@MosesJD86]

Yeah, maybe if we, black men, were more supportive, protective and nurturing of black women, they wouldn’t have to be so strong.

[@stephemeye3786]

Say it again!

[@tracey8987]

That whole thread is cap the guy started it because he got dragged for saying disgusting things about black women

[@Alicapy]

Ofc why would they mention us when they don't really care?

[@tracey8987]

Alimagedon_1368 the guy had tweets saying WW are better than BW call us nappy headed the list goes on and on I’m over it

[@opaluci9761]

I knew he was shady. I gave this the side eye when I saw this on my timeline.

[@mimia.4810]

I knew something was fishy about a black man praising black women. It's all fake love 🥴

[@imnwithnols]

@@imaginedatingdarkskingirls4930 tf you just say?

[@karlahussain7575]

Yes we deal with pain and hate. But not all of us are the “strong black women” stereotype you don’t see white, Asian or Hispanic women being described as “strong” what’s up with that?

[@talkswithali]

Girl, they are trying to make it seem like we can handle anything when we are just as human as anyone else!

[@MaleniaBladeofMessmer]

Evangelin Samantha Madari LETS GO ISRAEL!!!✊🏽

[@Nekole1]

Exactly,

[@QueenTici]

@@evangelinsamanthamadari3375 You speak truth. I will check out those vids.

[@MeganAllen1738]

A while back on this channel I was pointing out the problem with calling black women and girls strong and magical. Black women did not want to hear it. I'm glad you all are waking up

[@tleeanna]

Dam.. I love our strength as well but Sometimes we don’t want to be strong.

[@LK-em2ly]

What would you be otherwise?

[@mewmew6158]

You shouldn't have to be so hard on yourselves or hide how you feel, you deserve to be expressive. Now why the hell doesn't everyone agree?

[@Cybershadowz]

Yup done being strong

[@mimia.4810]

L K A human.

[@mrszoldyck8186]

@@LK-em2ly vulnerable!

[@jjjj.5]

Sometimes I want to be known for more than what I can endure or take . The load us bw carry is a load no one will ever understand.

[@talkswithali]

Exactly We tend to always be on the Frontline of injustice and such and using our voice instead of black men, who SHOULD be the one on the Frontline and in front of us. protecting us! It's sad

[@highdefinition8261]

I want to be known for more than a warrior ALL the time!

[@KhaosDancer]

The best thing to do is a mass exodus from the stereotype. We can no longer be here to mule for acceptance from black men. We have to silently take our femininity back, especially in these times. How many bullet holes must we get before bm find us beautiful? How many burns from tear gas before our burning eyes become smart sassy and alluring for bm? If we were any other race, we'd be waiting at home for our men to come back from the protests, bc we, along with the children, would be the symbol he's fighting for. It's time to stop being warriors. We need to silently stop, and get back into feminine areas of protest AND of life. Stay at home. Organize fundraisers. Spread awareness. But we have to stop putting ourselves at the front line. Only then will we become known for more than being Wakandan "royal" guard of kings who value us for the same strength they use as an excuse to NOT choose us. Sorry for the length. But this strong mess, and the hypocrisy and emotional blackmail that come with it, makes my blood boil

[@cleopatramyers6134]

nevaaaaaaaaa!

[@sarahbrinkley2180]

I’m a 14 year old black girl please excuse me for my ignorance when I ask this question , but what loads do we carry?

[@Stephanie56372]

Strong won’t bring my life back

[@Bliss-kt1hg]

Im saying

[@lvjonjon215]

I’m sorry For calling Y’all strong , y’all shouldn’t have to be.

[@queentrina7222]

Most of us don't even have childhood because we're busy raising ourselves and our siblings

[@Aquariuswonder86]

Queen Trina that part 👏🏽👏🏽 I think that’s why I’ve never really had a strong urge to have children of my own.

[@chenellebeautytv]

Period

[@Andrea-be8qz]

This is very interesting. I’m a Latina woman and I also have fed into the narrative that black women are “strong” out of respect and admiration that I have for you. I never realized that this perception of strength is doing more harm than good. I wanna thank you, Eloho, for continuously educating me on these issues. Much love 💞

[@witkneemenyon5612]

❤️❤️❤️. I myself never even realized how much harm it has been doing

[@LadyPinkster]

Andrea Thanks for sharing your opinion. In the latino community, do you hate when others call you all spicy?

[@Andrea-be8qz]

Nina w It’s more of an eye roll than anything. So I can only imagine that annoyance tenfold for black women considering the history behind it

[@LadyPinkster]

Andrea ah okay, I was always wondering. thanks for responding :)

[@NoName-be8vp]

Black men don’t realize how much this “strong” stereotype affects black women and girls. Im 5’6 and about 116 pounds. Yes I’m underweight, I’m also very soft spoken and a crazy book worm. The fact that both men and women, especially from other races look at me and literally tell me “wow I thought you were rude/loud/tough etc, i thought you’d be ratchet, wow you’re actually sweeter than I thought” 😐... what part of me looks intimidating to you? You barley know me. And those words were basically upon first encounters too. So therefore, ppl are looking at black women before actually knowing them and assuming they’re masculine as hell. I’m proof that size doesn’t matter. You’re darkskin? Oh you must be loud, you must be ratchet, you must sound rough 24/7, you must be able to take anyone’s crap. Also, because of me being a book worm, being skinny and being soft, ppl call me white. That’s the problem. Anything feminine = white to the black community, and nobody in the black community wants to be called “white”. So it forces our girls to stick to masculinity because unless you’re “strong and independent” you aren’t a real black girl. Let black girls be who they want 🙄 black men need to start learning to protect us because this stereotype is giving other races of men reasons to disrespect us.

[@brittanyr1456]

👏🏾 .. I couldn’t have explained it better. I’m in the same 🚣‍♂️

[@starberrysweetee1495]

This has been my experience forever! I'm tiny, I dance ballet, I'm super into science and reading. People always act so surprised when they get to know me, like they didn't expect me to be so mild-mannered. It's beyond maddening to think that peolpe every day are misjudging me based on something outside of my control.

[@NoName-be8vp]

Starberry Sweetee exactly !! It annoys the hell out of me

[@theetherealshaye]

I relate to all the experiences on here on such a personal level. I’m the same way, underweight, an avid reader, soft spoken, highly emotional and passionate, and people forget that girls like us exist. Skin colour doesn’t have a personality attached to it. We are as diverse in character as we are in our skin. Allow us to be diverse.

[@joyandbeauty2024]

No Name I agree and can relate to everything u said. And it’s so disrespectful that ppl would actually say to u that they thought that you’d be ratchet, loud, and tough when they first saw u. I mean for them to admit that as if it’s not disrespectful and as if it doesn’t show that they’re a racist pos is just crazy. They basically gave u a back-handed compliment and I would’ve replied to them “oh so u usually automatically assume that every black girl u meet will be loud, tough, and ratchet?” and watch them squirm to answer the question once they realize how racist they just admitted themselves to be

[@valadina4477]

Is it just me or I did not hear the words beautiful, affectionate, sensual, seductive, sexy, tender, loving, kind, sympathetic, empathetic, forgiving, romantic, sexual, enticing, sweet as brown sugar, Queens, ect😔 made a sound like we were MEN 👀😭

[@tavi5841]

Exactly 😐

[@bellarennnwa6488]

FACTS🗣

[@chocolaterini17]

They were describing their mothers🙄😑😒

[@nse7332]

Right

[@goodjudygirlfriend]

I was looking for this comment 🙌🏾.

[@sea4605]

Yikes. This makes it seem as if we are indestructible. We are humans too, can feel pain and be as vulnerable as anyone else. It's not a compliment at all. It's a reflection of how much we have to handle on our own in this world.

[@micahmoore2424]

Sèa I feel that being vulnerable IS strong. It’s powerful. Not everyone can do that

[@angelofscorpio]

So basically, we’re emotional (and physical) punching bags that exist to be selfless incubators, sex toys, and disrespected + non reciprocated warriors for black men. Kay, got it.

[@harvestmoonbeam2060]

I’ve always hated that word “ strong”, it makes me feel masculine.

[@blueiris1542]

The word strong is not a masculine word.

[@youngwolff2560]

How does the word strong makes you feel masculine. Just because you're strong, it doesn't make you masculine.

[@oghenerunorp9405]

Strong is a masculine connotated word. Stop acting dense

[@CrystalLovesChrist]

Young Wolff But that’s what people mean when they call black women that. One minute we’re muling for them and being “strong”, the next minute we aren’t fit wives because we’re “masculine”. But that’s what they want us to be when we’re dying on the frontlines for em🙄

[@sarahbrinkley2180]

I’m a 14 year old black girl so please excuse my ignorance when I ask this question, but whose forcing u to be “strong”. I’m a introvert and when I speak i don’t use much slang and I’m not loud like a stereotype black female so other kids in my neighborhood accuse me of “acting white”.

[@chanelghostin6060]

i’m mixed. i was watching this video and my white mom overheard “black women are strong” and said “what about white women” chile 💀

[@s._valentine]

😭 RIP

[@jeg0623]

😯

[@sugarcube616]

lord 🙄

[@vurgolove2]

....👀....

[@Julia-ji9kr]

Mrs Pizarro CT Girl I hope you’re being sarcastic

[@EnchantiNails]

I am tired of being seen as STRONG child. I wanna cry and I wanna express an opinion without being seen as rude and angry

[@AmanirenaII]

Or not a "true black woman". Lmao, they literally teach us at a young age that if we show emotion in public we won't survive in this world. Honestly express your emotions how you want black women. We're damned of we do and damned if we don't.

[@adrianasabode1583]

I remember when I was younger, I went through some tough shit. I had a mental breakdown at a Child Care center, (I was probably like 10-11.) because my mom came by drunk, and it made me break. (She always drank. She was an alcoholic, and when she was drunk she used to hit me.) I remember catching the daycare teacher calling me a “brat” and that she just wanted to “strangle me” because of it. We black women/girls have emotions..

[@oghenerunorp9405]

Adriana's Abode that’s terrible. I’m so sorry 😢

[@MrsNicolas]

Or seen as weak for crying or yelled at when you start crying 🙄🤦🏽‍♀️

[@mourningst5r]

Adriana's Abode Fucking ridiculous. Sadly I can relate badly.

[@vox3347]

Is strength the only thing they have to say about black woman? Because at the beginning all I was hearing was Strength or "They are so strong" over and over....

[@Monrentho2008]

Pretty much😑

[@guacgirl]

Basically, black women are MEN is what I am hearing everytime I hear STRONG STRONG STRONG. LOL Ask your self WHY are we so strong? Then, why do you add more burden for black women to bear? Shouldnt you try to give us a better life as a black man,if you LOOOOVVVEEE us so much???!! 👀🙌😏

[@mayfulgal]

@@guacgirl exactly, I wish it was the other way around so bw don't have to be strong

[@TheeBratzDollxox]

We can carry their burdens on our shoulders while they slap and salivate over our fat asses from behind. Win win for them right 😒😒😑🙄

[@micahmoore2424]

Now I can understand this. It’s the only compliment besides when they compliment our physical. We are brilliant and passionate as well

[@vurgolove2]

Honestly, maybe some black men like that we are strong so they can continue to slack and do whatever they want to do at our expense. We can't shed our tears but they can, they cant see our potential, but we have to see theirs, we have to be the backbone so they don't have to have one. Ugh... Chile.

[@Kimmy_95]

Well said!!! You summed it up PERFECTLY.

[@chinneynz7861]

Point blank period !!!!!!

[@oghenerunorp9405]

Do NOT respond to the troll

[@BlackGirlLovesAnime6]

That's exactly what it is

[@playablue]

Ty ty please stop this. White suprmeacy loves u. please do, stop saying they when its not all black men.... same as they in regards to women or any black woman. Geeez.. white suprmacy loves threads like this.

[@bossytweed6664]

I'll never forget a conversation I had with an older white woman about this topic. We were talking about how men don't pursue women like they used to and she said, "maybe some men hold back with you because they know you being a black woman they know you're stronger and won't put up with their crap"😒 I am so annoyed by this stereotype! IT IS NOT A COMPLIMENT! It offends me! I AM NOT A MAN! PERIOD!

[@lumilabiyi]

Eloho can you talk about little black girls (especially dark skins girls) in the middle of protests screaming with poster signs? Maybe it’s just me but I don’t like it, I believe kids should be children 😢 especially little girls

[@AJMQueen]

You're not alone. I don't like it either. While I'm giving my children age appropriate information, I am not letting them participate in the protests. They're macing, gassing, and shooting rubber bullets into crowds WITH CHILDREN PRESENT. It's not safe out there for kids.

[@sdh7091]

Yes! Children should not be at these marches/protests, they could potentially get hurt, especially if they get out of hand. With these rubber bullets and tear gas, she should've been at home.

[@MeraBaid]

We need to be careful to not burden our children with racial anxiety either. I've been writing about this because it's been going on for a long time. Age appropriate is good but that needs to be defined, I'm working on a video about that. Facts only, no opinion, no breaking down. This where we need to be strong for our kids not anyone else.

[@AJMQueen]

MeraBaid and KYV subbing to your channel cause I wanna learn more. I agree, now is the time to be strong for our children❤️

[@kittothekat427]

I hate it because it’s not safe!! And it’s necessary

[@itsonlyfair]

This is the reason for so many of us having mental illnesses

[@CrystalLovesChrist]

Kan I Live the reason why we are most likely to die while giving birth in hospitals. They don’t “believe” our pain cos they think we’re so SKRONG and can endure anything

[@Womynxx]

Netochukwu I’m terrified to have a child. @Kan I Live A lot of us need therapy and we need to stop stigmatizing it in the community.

[@TiandreJR2414]

As a black men I can tell this cap. This sounds forced. They say they love a black women “strength” but that same strength be scaring them off.. there’s a difference between strength and caring

[@Nekole1]

I agree

[@jvstkiki]

If I hear STRONG ☝🏾 more time 😤🤣

[@librarianrose4472]

I felt every single one of those emojis

[@jenniferwade7861]

@@librarianrose4472 Especially the one in the car😩

[@שםשםמִשפחה]

You want to be the shit out of people? damn such strong woman lol.

[@iameloho718]

Pease watch the video before commenting “what’s wrong with being strong” ... I explain it in the video 😆😒

[@whitebrick87]

Had to lay it on em before the mush mouth trolls come flooding in

[@MeganAllen1738]

Eloho you are maturing a lot and I'm truly proud of you. I used to be on this channel trying to explain why calling black women and girls strong and magical was a problem, but black women did not want to hear it. You are growing and learning so much.

[@tegagreats9332]

Its so true! Back handed compliments

[@bellalegendre2644]

Very good good and insightful video! After watching the indie movie "Strong Black Woman", I started rethinking about being referred to as strong as a compliment. Because the only time the wife in that movie referred to herself as a strong black woman...was when she was fighting with her husband.

[@reeceburrell5487]

Eloho, log in on his account on Twitter. BW are exposing colorist comments.

[@TheLeah2344]

I told my mom I don’t want to be strong all the time and I’m human. I told her the strong black women stereotype is hurting us and she got OFFENDED saying she is a strong black woman and she is a single mother who did it all on her own. She even called me WEAK.

[@BanCensorship]

I'm tired of being "strong" for everyone else

[@keyanna2633]

GIRL ME TOO IM TIRED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@talkswithali]

LONG RANT!! I have come to realize that black women are seen as strong just because we tend to speak out on matters that matter to us. And frankly, it's exhausting. We are not strong just because of what we say and do. We are regularly human beings and I am tired of being seen as some superhero BECAUSE of my skin color or my voice. I want to be seen as submissive but not afraid to speak out. WHY WHY WHY are we always seen as strong???? It's an internal belief of sorts that needs to be broken in some way. Black men use the term "strong" only on black women when we are seen standing up for them but white women are always seen as "submissive" no matter what, no mattwr what bs they put black men through themselves. It's tiring and bothersome all together

[@MeraBaid]

The whole submissive thing is not a compliment either. It's just propoganda that men have latched onto and they don't really know why, either that or they have abusive tendencies. A healthy man doesn't look for a submissive woman (even if he uses that word) he looks for someone who compliments him and why would anyone want to be submissive anyway? This is a habit based in fear, like a dog. There are many more ways to be feminine than to be submissive.

[@oghenerunorp9405]

MeraBaid and KYV I think of submission, in the sense of going with the flow instead of trying to do it yourself or trying to take the lead. I think that’s the submission they’re talking about. Plus, if you have a dominant man, then you don’t want a dominant woman who will try to compete with you in the relationship. Submission can also be out of respect instead of fear.

[@MeraBaid]

@@oghenerunorp9405 and this is where semantics come in. I will admit I'm a stickler for clear communication and the word denotes something more than "not dominant". That is one of my major interests though. I don't like the use (and overuse) of the word because it often is not clear enough what is meant by submission. It's a loaded word. True submission is defaulting to someone else. Not just the lead situationally. You can't be totally submissive and have a partnership. A totally submissive person is essentially a slave. Only abusive people want a relationship in which the other person defaults to them like a slave.

[@margareta.6506]

Ugh..the story of Henrietta Lacks alone highlights the disrespect toward Black women. Thank you for really touching on this topic Eloho.

[@jaminwaite3867]

Not to mention Black women are 200%+ more likely to die in childbirth...and generally left to die by the medical system

[@Andrea-be8qz]

Normani is better than Camila Unfortunately, no. Black women are about 2 and a half times more likely to die of childbirth in the US, making it more like 250%. Researchers have no explanation for this, other than racial bias. It’s complete bullshit. If you want more info: www.nbcnews.com/news/amp/ncna1125896

[@jehovahthickness1675]

I was the only student in my predominantly white class who chose to do a book report on that novel. As soon as I picked it up, I couldn’t stop reading. Finished it in one night in absolute tears. Although no one cared about my presentation, it was incredibly powerful to me.

[@ashleybree5482]

Strong is a triggering word for me ,and I'm tried of ppl using "strong " to describe us.IM TIREDDDDD. I understand now why everytime my bf tells me to be strong I say I DONT WANT TO BE STRONG .

[@sharnagrayson9649]

I’m tired of people calling us strong like why do I have to be strong I seen on the shaderoom where they had a little ass black girl that was no more than 5 speaking to grown people about what’s going on and they were saying she already a strong black women like no she’s a damn baby that needs to be home I swear we need to get that strong shit out the vocabulary while talking about black women I have had it 🥴🥺

[@deej5608]

EXACTLY. The shade room has a clip of a toddler marching saying no Justice no peace and people are cheering it on as if we don't know that police aren't shooting rubber bullets, tear gas and killing people put there. That's not ok

[@highdefinition8261]

Well, unless majority of black women stop acting like social justice warriors then this will continue.

[@sharnagrayson9649]

High Definition they need to stop but they won’t a lot of black women believe that this is the way for black men and everyone to love us if we fight hard for them when black men don’t give a shit about us and neither does any other race let’s just keep it a buck 🤷🏽‍♀️

[@Breonaleonard]

OKAY! Girl that video was so cringeful to see. And it’s blows my mind that OUR community is praising that

[@sharnagrayson9649]

Laraine Soul see no your doing entirely too much don’t bring African women down saying dumb shit

[@princessleah187xx4]

Ask them why they love White and Latina women, the answers would've been COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. Strength is not a compliment. Strong just means being able to endure. This...........................wow!

[@undeadisha666]

Yep. # BurnTheCape

[@ms.wilson6439]

I agree.

[@jeremiahalexander250]

When do Black women get to not be strong we as Black men dont give y'all the chance to not be strong Black men we need to do better. Also Black women deserve and need the chance to be vulnerable. (I dont know how to word this better)

[@chococookies4]

@Shadi Why are uou here? If you can't allow a black woman to be vulnerable and feminine you don't belong here. Strong and resilient is not a compliment.

[@tiptip7]

@@chococookies4 She's just saying that whenever a black man compliments a black woman, here come the black women hating dudes calling him a simp. She was just telling him to ignore those comments when they come, not saying that strong and resilient is a compliment.

[@zoe._.1850]

Honestly not a compliment. Has me feeling like the damn hulk 😑

[@kourtneydouthard-becker1501]

@Jhgd Eggg 😩😩😩😂😂😂😂

[@divine2297]

Ah😂😂

[@thesellingsocialworker4773]

“Thank you, black women, for putting up with our pathology time and time again, no matter how much it encourages your own. You build us up so we can turn around and give our best to white girls, and still pat us on our back every time! We can be less of a man when we’re with you, and we so thank you for that! You da best, sis!”

[@iameloho718]

😢

[@fatudaniel7301]

Apart from being strong there’s NOTHING else they love about us. This should speak volumes ladies. Enough with being strong. Let’s be just GIRLS for once. 😓

[@jadenalise]

I remember back in high school I was sexually assaulted. I confided in one of my male friends about it, and in response he said “you’re strong, you’ll get through it.” Now I know it came from a good place but I remember thinking wtf, I’m not strong rn Im at my most vulnerable. It always bothered me bc in that instance I realized that’s how the world views us black women. I’m a sensitive, vulnerable person. I am also a black woman. Let’s create the space for both, not all of us are “strong” or have the capability to be all the time.

[@Nekole1]

I agree. Thanks for sharing your story.

[@raearchive]

'You love us unconditionally'- HA I was waiting for that!

[@iameloho718]

NO MATTER WHAT ! 🙄

[@osayiorumwense2892]

“ . . . Becomes a wretched thing.”

[@strawberrycheesecake7912]

The ride or die

[@simpliabigail]

I remember at work one time my colleagues and I were speaking about relationships and I said at this time I want to focus on my studies (since I’m still in school) and this one white girl was like “Yes, since you’re a strong black woman that don’t need no man.” And my eyes almost rolled to the back of my head. I was like wow what a stereotype, we really need to break away from this narrative. 🤦🏾‍♀️

[@asdfghjzxcvbnm7637]

And the thing is were not supposed to be this strong but men refuse to act like a man

[@franchesskaw36]

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 truth

[@jaminwaite3867]

Then blame Black women for emasuclating them🙄

[@brooklynnegunn627]

This!!

[@2023Mermaid]

What black men love about black women: Strong What black men love about non black women: Sexy, attractive, trophy, sensual, smart, patient, "good hair", kind, successful, feisty, eye color, caring, lovely, thicc, cute, dateable, wife material. They turn into a damn thesaurus then 😒. That's ok though, cause we marrying Jared's, Yin Ko's, Ahmad's or Pablo's anyways💅

[@Asha-dn3gh]

Black women are strong because they have to be and are expected to be. That's not a compliment but shows something else that needs to be discussed.

[@user-sh4mh2rw2p]

We shouldn’t have to ALWAYS be strong, people should just stop hating on us!

[@WhitneyUchendu]

PREACH!!! i always see black women saying "I have a black father..son..brother" when talking about BLM but never include themselves who is a black woman that can also fall victim to police brutality.

[@Nekole1]

Preach!!

[@Tanya-hh6rw]

The guy that tweeted this was exposed as having anti black women tweets, which is very telling

[@SuP3rpRiNc3sSa]

Really? Link?

[@gdesiree29]

Not surprising

[@Tanya-hh6rw]

I’ve checked they’ve been deleted now sorry 😭

[@zsazsa4159]

And the crazy part is we gotta be “strong” because of the lack of blk men support! We wouldn’t have to be so dang strong if we had a partner who held us down in our community

[@blackdivine6762]

💯🎯🔥🔥🔥🔥

[@globalstudy01]

That's why we're dumping black men

[@pamayapaya]

Yes! Like yes we’re strong but it’s honestly so sad that we always have to be. We’re never allowed to be soft and vulnerable and sad. Why does no one want to protect us?

[@chabbie]

I was reading all the replies 95% mentioned some sort of struggle and strength. Less than 20% mentioned anything in terms of beauty or any other feminine attribute other than a "big ole butt". Upsetting

[@davinciacox1859]

I was exhausted hearing u read the same thing over and over (strong and superwoman). That even sound inhumane to just be strong all the time. How can you not feel pain? Am mind blown that they think since we’re “strong” they could treat us like trash.

[@chestchirecateyes]

They forget that superman is technically not human period.

[@duquesacrittenden9797]

Being strong is great. But feeling safe, loved, secure, appreciated and respected is everything.

[@elefantlort4092]

Its so sad how black women are always forgotten.....

[@girlfriendnextdoor]

First off, why do bm/everyone else love putting us through pain and call our strength beautiful; but the trauma is us doing too much??? Please make it make sense

[@LittleMissDeeDee]

I completely agree and support your sentiments. I will say that black women need to take accountability by admitting that this narrative has been pushed by black women also. The idea that a strong black man needs a strong Black woman by his side, advocating for being independent and not needing a man to do jack for us - we also have supported this narrative. Personally, I’ve never liked it because I feel it strips me off my vulnerability but I know many women pride themselves in being super human.

[@misshisokapaints109]

Lol his page is gone because his colourism was exposed😂😂😂😂😂

[@iameloho718]

Whaaaaaaat 🤦🏾‍♀️

[@misshisokapaints109]

@@iameloho718 yup, tweets popped up where he was talking about how much black girls ARE baldheaded, and they look like a crunchy bar when they have acne. Making fun of black girls who say they're "winning". Ooo also how much he loves white women

[@peteadenuga]

lmaoo. it was so obvious.

[@playablue]

Where do you think. He got it from? Most black men raised by who? Ill leave that there. Love the balck woman and love the sense that comes with it.

[@ab_4723]

playablue it’s easier to blame the parent that stays but why don’t you consider the impact that absent fathers have on their sons lives. A black man leaves a black woman to raise their black son, don’t you think that has any effect on how black sons view their mothers??

[@ZZdebbiecake]

I just wanna be a princess, a small, dainty, beautiful princess. That's the type of black woman I wanna be. Is that ok with y'all. Like damn.

[@marylester45]

Happy Birthday Breonna 😔

[@paisleykinchlow]

We’re strong by default tho. Men left us to be the single parent. Left us to pay to the bills, slave at our 9-5s, and be “independent” because they refuse to be the providers. Left us to stand on the frontline because they’re afraid to be the shield and to protect. When will they realize our “strength” comes from them not being able to handle the responsibilities that God set forth for them? God didn’t make Eve to be strong, to protect, and to provide for Adam. So to some of the men who posted these complements, thanks but no thanks. The biggest compliment you can give us right now is standing up for us and being the type of men that God made y’all out to be. Yes, there are some black women who are not deserving of that kind of treatment but that doesn’t give y’all an excuse to fall short.

[@angiejordan6454]

Amen! Especially, "Yes, there are some black women who are not deserving of that kind of treatment but that doesn’t give y’all an excuse to fall short." Any perceived mistake a black women may make is viewed as a rationalization to demolish her and to slack in his own responsibilities.

[@citrinestone6884]

I have been here for WELL over a year and you always come with the girlfriend vibes. You always having me talk to this screen like you really here or something

[@iameloho718]

Like sis let’s talk 🤗

[@citrinestone6884]

I would love the conversation. Your were the first woman I saw on KZbin speak on issues like this. Plus your beautiful and cut throat when it comes to issues that effect black women. A female at any age could learn a thing or two from you 💯💅🏾 I found Thee Mademoiselle, Empressive, Chrissie, Golden Baby and BLACK FEMININITY TV and so many others that give such insight on my favorite artists drama, political views; perspectives on the same topic with different commentary that gives such rich and intelligent aura. It’s truly refreshing 😌 You give me a safe zone from social media. I can look at it in a palatable way that doesn’t annoy me to no end Bless 😭🙏

[@chelseajoseph4681]

I already know she gonna come with the facts and the tea

[@jeremiahalexander250]

And the looks

[@09kenedy]

My husband told me that 1 time as a compliment and I had to correct him. “Abeg Abeg, I’m not strong, I’m very very soft.” I. Have not heard him utter that ish to me again.

[@oneandonly1990]

Being strong is honestly forced on BW. Ive always been feminine, girly girl and it confused people bc Im not only am I a very dark women im also tall. I guess it was expected of me to be masculine. My mother literally tried to beat the femininity out of me telling me "you're too big and black for all that"...even as an adult those words hurt me. But I kind of understand why she did it...BW are unprotected. I had no father or uncles or cousins to protect me so being feminine and pretty was dangerous. Her abuse was her sick way of protecting me 😢. If I ever have a daughter "strong" will not be in my vocabulary for her. She will be "beautiful", "smart", "kind" and "loving". Her father, possible brothers and uncles will be "strong" and protect her. She will have the freedom to be feminine and express herself...something that I and a lot of other black girls don't get.

[@oneandonly1990]

@@WFL-f4e thank you! Unfortunately I can't change the past but I definitely can change the future. Therapy, prayer and staying away from my mother has been the best thing for me. BW we have to focus on ourselves now because noone else will.

[@jaywilliams4846]

Happy Birthday, Breonna. May your soul rest in heaven, you didn't deserve the fate that you got ❤✊🏽

[@babyyodachelsea7034]

Take a shot at everytime they say they love our strength 😭 Mr. Compliment! 😂😂😂 this entire video spoke to my soul

[@iameloho718]

🤣‼️

[@capricorn2723]

Woahhhhh, I'd be wasted 😭😭😭😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 I'm good!

[@mp71001]

You’d end up in a damn coma! 😵💀

[@Tyland2020]

Who said Riri wanted you tho? 😂

[@iameloho718]

Like who TF he thinks he is 🥴🤣

[@skindippedingold]

Right!!! The audacity!?!?!?

[@milandiu5455]

😂😂😂ikr the audacity

[@mamboawasum-henry4980]

I wrote a poem about a black woman’s strength not being that much of a compliment. Glad I’m not the only one who feels this way. How can a man protect you or take care of you properly if he sees you as strong as he is? That’s how we Black women, especially darker skinned black women get the short end of the stick.

[@breaklunner]

I CAN BARELY OPEN A JAR AND I CRY FREQUENTLY.

[@isx9046]

🦨 I couldn’t find a mule emoji, but a skunk will do, because those so called compliments STANK!

[@abreeanderson]

YOUR PERSPECTIVE IS REFRESHING AND EXTREMELY NEEDED. I’m so happy to have come across your chanel

[@IphiaCarlene]

I have come to realize that this strong black woman....I dont know her and she is not me. I am a very sensitive flower, who battles with shyness and depression way to often. I still sleep with a night light, love sci fi movies and watches anime. The only reason I am independence is because I have been forced to be. I have yet to meet a black man that has mad me feel safe without wanting sex without a commitment. I am a TIRED black woman.

[@keyanna2633]

.your comment resonated with me so much I am done being strong.

[@rosakami1588]

Me and you both sister im moslty sensitive than strong like its a necessity for black woman as if we dont hve different qualities of our own individually.

[@ladiesindependent6681]

Exactly... No compliment

[@Hitomiaka]

GIRL. My whte woman manager just told me how strong I am today. I definitely felt some type of way.

[@christianand7902]

Sometimes I don't want to be strong, I want to be able to cry, I want to be embraced and protected. I want to feel like a girl not a warrior

[@yourfavoritepessimisticexi8041]

There's nothing wrong with being strong but when that is the ONLY compliment you have for black women, that's when I don't like it.

[@angelofscorpio]

The fact that I’ve never felt feminine around the men in my life says a lot. I didn’t even know other races of women didn’t act like us when I was younger. The fact that I thought it was normal for men to act like women and force us to coddle them

[@Auntkekebaby]

So when is it time for BW feel anything. When is it time for BW to be vulnerable. BW, we carry too much. NEVER feel some kind of way about taking time out for you.

[@jenniferwade7861]

We couldn't get a "Black women look beautiful in any color, especially in yellow, red, and green"," The way their skin has been kissed by the sun. " Black women are so talented and intelligent", or "Black women are really sweet as brown sugar/ rum when you get to know them and they like you" or sumn😒 ! I mean Damn! I got better compliments from my managers during evaluation 🤨😒!

[@UncJoWe]

11:00 That artwork is very telling! The White/Non-Black Woman has the Black Man by the neck, yet the Black woman is carrying the weight of the world & even going through pain (her foot bleeding) yet still uplifts the Black Man & treats him like royalty. 🔍

[@way2kool89]

So basically they love that we can take their abuse great so I can take a punch #blacklove 🤮🤮🤮

[@kourtneydouthard-becker1501]

Lol..

[@sarahbrinkley2180]

Kourtney Douthard-Becker it’s not funny and not all black people are the same . Not all black men are this way

[@TynishaTalks]

Oooo sis. You def raised a very valid point about our strength only being valid during wartime. I have to share this.

[@tleeanna]

Honestly I agree with the statement you made of the black men coming together and saying black women and children stand back we got this, we gonna hold it down for y’all but then I think about the black feminists who would have a problem with that as well. They feel like they can do anything a man can do which is true to an extent but they CANNOT BE A MAN at the end of the day!

[@nothingtoseehere299]

Black women stop defending everyone, be selfish and hypergamous.

[@AmoreAmoraa00]

I want to be allowed to be soft. Even as child I was never given the privilege of being soft I always had to be strong for myself and everyone around me. I want to be soft and loved

[@bellalegendre2644]

There was an episode of the FOX show "Star" where Queen Latifah's character had a mental breakdown. A lot of things transpired that caused her to get to that point. The doctor recommended she take a little vacation to rest her mind and her body. She told her, "black women are the strongest beings on the planet...but we are not invincible". Sometimes I feel like that belief of the "strong black woman" can be damaging. It makes it seem like we can take anything and everything and not feel pain or shed a tear. There was a movie I saw on Tubi.com called "Strong Black Woman". I hated how the wife would only refer to herself as a strong black woman when she was arguing with her husband. When there was drama going on or her unmarried spinster auntie was sticking her nose in her business. But when things were good...she's not referring to herself as a strong black woman. That definitely made me rethink that "compliment" of being a strong black woman. Just like some sisters don't like being referred to as "queens" because they feel it makes black women sound ferocious or violent.

[@CoCoFantastique]

Wow! sounds like some of these men found a fine dedicated MULE!!!! May not be beautiful but they get the job done, endure and work in the harshest conditions. Chileeee help us Lord

[@ilooklikeaburntchickennugg5511]

"Strong" has such a masculine tone to it. It's like saying Guys are "Flowers" It's not seen as a compliment to them because it tales away their masculinity. Just like strong takes away black women's feminity. Black women can't be seen as soft because they're "weak." Idk how many times i've been called "scary", "weak", etc. for not indulging in drama. It's childish and not worth the time nor effort. Instead of being called stronge how about "beautiful","smart","delicate"? It would make a big difference on how us black women respond to things.

[@Cuteskittles22]

There are so many other ways to describe the amount of greatness a black women has. Our humor, our fashion sense, our smiles, how unique we all are but still there to hype each other up, our confidence not just in our strength but in the ability to love, our generosity, our spirituality, OUR BEAUTY not just physically but internally. Our knowledge and intelligence. Yes we are independent but we need to depend on people too. Our self esteem, our happiness, the ability to bring smiles wherever we go. And last and happily least our strength. Yes we are strong but it doesn’t start from that. All the qualities listed above create our strength and I won’t deny that we are strong but people need to realize what makes our strength.