Tears and Triumph: A Psychologist's Emotional Reaction to Oshi no Ko Episode 1

[@psyculturists]

Hello everyone thanks everyone for all the love and support

[@kodytiffany5686]

Having died once at least already (pools were not my friend as a toddler); I can say that if you do not remember said death then on a personal level death does not apply. I logically know I could die. But my house being on fire; a heard of horses galloping towards me; my sis taking my life jacket... no thought of self preservation really existed. In the case of my sis taking my life jacket, that became the origin story for my ability to swim and in turn my enjoyment of swimming. It was the ground disappearing beneath my feet underwater (was at the river) that actually activated my self preservation; yet death was not the concern, blindness and confusion and the fear they brought were. I died on the operating table at the age of 3 or 4. air bubble to the heart while they were setting up for a brain scan (CAT I believe); this was back in 87/88 so the tech was fairly new. Worst side effect was all is the doubt of my identity and the reset that caused it. I do not think I am human; rather my husk is and I am a 5th dimensional being compressed into this 3 dimensional body. I doubt being human so that was the thought that first came as what I am if not human. I do not feel traumatized; I feel imprisoned within layers of seals. Some of which I have broken but otherwise the rest remain (about 3 of 9). I have been traumatized about certain things where I feel it as Trauma. But not death. I can watch the fire in my breaker box and ask in perfect calm for a fire extinguisher, a sense of clinical detachment about the whole occurance. As double edged swords go I do not mind being able to be the calm one in an emergency. So long as I am not being asked things at least. Nothing unsettles me more than not knowing how to respond and being rushed to give one. I can say that I fear vegetative states and broken arms more than death itself. I fear every needle regardless of how its interacting with me; more than death. I only have a will to not hurt those that love me with my death, not the dying itself. Life is the only option. Death hurts everyone but the recipient of it.

[@kodytiffany5686]

Ever consider playing Octopath Traveler 1 and 2 on stream? Both games have hours of lore to explore and tons of characters to bring up aspects of. I know I would love to see that. They are turned based so plenty of natural pause moments.

[@kodytiffany5686]

I have always been the mask... honestly tho I can't tell exactly when I put it on its been to long. I must not be free because money prevents that freedom from being possible in the first place. Freedom to me means not having to bend the knee ever. It means that missteps won't hurt those around me even if they rely on me. Ultimately one is only ever free when you can follow your whims and not fear severe loss because money was insufficent. If I want to wander the nation on foot. Then I should be able to without reserve.

[@kodytiffany5686]

One of my many sayings... bits of wisdom is: "Those who cannot Cope Manage; and those who cannot Manage cope." Meanning; being literal. Managers can't cope with things and people that can cope withings cannot manage effectively. In case our meanings differ. Cope= the ability to adapt on an almost instinctual level. Manage= the ability to adapt to your surroundings in a manner that meets expectations of the cast systems in ones life (being a leader; being a guide or aid of some kind. A manager at work (where I derived the meaning) cannot keep their job unless they master comprimize and can trick others to do the work for them. ie they are worthless if everyone just does their job, so its in their best interest to seem important and understand how best to fake it until they make it. People that cope with things are not stuck on the idea of "things must be this way" as a manger is. They know that surrender is the way to victory some of the time as that's just how that point of time was made a success. To tired to word better sorry.

[@kodytiffany5686]

You realize Ai is one of the words for love right. Damn you japanese word play. Also funnily enough it means Indigo. It is essentially the only word in Japanese and english that refers to a color but has no L equivalent in it. ie no R or L. I know this because a character I made for a story has the quirk of being incapable of expressing those letters based off the translation your reading. No R in Japanese and no L in English; no "el" in spainish or "LL" in languages with it... etc. Her name could be said by her in introduction so in English and Japanese it could not clash. Ai was her first name forget the last.

[@gibson17155]

“I thought this was going to be a cute idol show” *1 minute later* “Let’s talk about the concept of death” I’m still laughing about that!😂

[@dominaiscna]

I read this comment beforehand, and when this part of the video came up, I remembered your words and just burst out laughing 🤣💀 dammit

[@ArlanKels]

The reason I never expected this to be made into an anime is because it doesn't hold back. It points a finger at the industry and it says truths that the industry doesn't want people to realize are there. Whoever green lit this anime either had big balls or extreme greed.

[@dalmationblack]

incredible balls to adapt a manga that has a whole arc on exactly why some adaptations turn out poorly

[@David-hw8oi]

people with these types of balls also approved of filming 15 Years of Lies :)

[@claire6452]

@@dalmationblack The anime will not go this far.

[@dalmationblack]

@@claire6452 I expect it'll probably get a season 2 though

[@claire6452]

@@dalmationblack Better not expect anything until it happens, especially since Doga Kobo don't often do more than one season.

[@Souru_TV]

Honestly it is kinda impressive how much he can predict through psychology. I was honestly flabbergasted as a Manga Reader.

[@DirtyCommieMedia]

Bruh, unparalleled accuracy for sure

[@johnfsenpai]

I really don't buy that he went into this blind. He basically figured her out within a minute of seeing her.

[@KasaiKouhai]

@@johnfsenpai nah Ed is just that good.

[@assimilater-quicktips]

@@johnfsenpai that’s honestly a sign that she’s a grounded and believable character if anything

[@assimilater-quicktips]

@@KasaiKouhai I see it as credit to the author personally

[@albedo-sama9778]

THANK YOU FOR NOT DOWNPLAYING AQUA'S TRAUMA😭😭 Back when i started reading the manga, there were so many people who called Aqua a "mama-freak" or an "obsessive Ai fan" and told that he had to act mature since he was a grown man in his past life during the later arcs in the manga. Like it felt like everyone just forgot that at the end of the day, he was just a kid with the memories of an adult who was a doctor. It hurt seeing ppl call Aqua an edgy main character, when he was way more of a complex character and it was apparent how he would have been affected way more than Ruby by Ai's death. While everyone else was excited to see him exact revenge, i was just worried what all stuff he would have to resort to doing while discarding his morals away. Like a part of me wants karma to whoop his father yet another part of me is worried for Aqua, and how much he would spiral down and ends up doing something horrible. Really loved your analysis of the characters☺️ Kind of freaked me out when u could manage to pinpoint which direction the characters were going without having seen the entire episode or having read the manga yet 😂

[@foursunsets882]

So true! [Manga SPOILER WARNING!!!!] There are chapters in the manga that show the conflict between the teenaged and traumatized Aqua and the hate-filled identity that seems to be the doctor. I personally don't think the "doctor" persona really is the doctor who died, given how reasonable he was in life and how Aqua's personality affected by the "reincarnation" had high moral standards prior to Ai's death. I think he is just the memories of another soul that became distorted due to childhood trauma.

[@whyyoumadbro2370]

Like Aqua and Ruby need a long therapist session.

[@Skywolfhd20]

@@foursunsets882MANGA SPOILERS AHEAD i mean, the "ghost" of the doctor was alreasy shown to be a manifestation of aqua's trauma and guilt. we literally see the shadows of the doc's silluette go away to reveal aqua as he looked when ai died

[@RPGgrenade]

tbh that's what made me so excited about it. And once the whole stage play arc started... and kept going. I was just crying constantly almost every chapter because of how horrific it must've been.

[@paraalso]

I agree. It hurts a bit when some people just dismiss Aqua as an edgelord after everything that's happened. But I also feel people downplay Ruby's trauma too. They both went through something horrible in different ways. Trauma isn't a competition in terms of who was hurt worse.

[@Gentleman_Gabe24]

Ai's death resembles the real-life stabbing of Mayu Tomita, a 20-year-old Japanese singer and actress, in May 2016. Tomita originally became famous by playing a fictional idol named Ai Takano in the web drama Secret Girls. The perpetrator in Tomita's stabbing was a 27-year-old fan who had harassed her online and sent her unsolicited gifts. Twelve days before the attack, Tomita reported the harassment to the police out of fear for her safety, but they dismissed the case. Tomita survived the attack, but received lasting physical and psychological injuries. The incident led the Japanese national government to revise its anti-stalking laws to include online harassment.

[@waldhueter6605]

a thing that you might not have realised. but the last 3 lines of the MV. "Ah i finally said it, this is definetly not a lie, i love you all" are the "near" exact final words from AI to Ruby and Aqua. truly a wonderfull song build around an idol that shined like a star that losts its light far to soon

[@sanaan0168]

Yea Yoasobi but soo much effort into it even the animation the the music vid showed Ai disappear after hugging them and saying "aishiteru"

[@pieperson444]

the song is based on the short story, if you haven't read it.

[@Horesmi]

When I said "let him cook", I did not expect FIVE HOURS!! But I expected something like that.

[@humourlessjester3584]

I've been trained to analyze stories through literary and linguistic theories, but it's so interesting to see fictional works like this analyzed through psychological theories.

[@yezetsu]

Just here to say that, this is probably one of the best reaction to this first episode I saw, and MAN the way you analyze the characters is so good and accurate, I liked it a lot!

[@psyculturists]

I’m glad you liked it!! Also hope you learned something new or maybe pondered on some of the psych topics brought up ❤️

[@Dante1282]

in manga he mention that he hit a main artery so he instantly knows there is nothing he can do as a child even less then as an adult doctor.

[@blackdragonking81]

this whole video is basically: "I wonder if they're going to explore x issue" they do "WAIT NO, NOT LIKE THIS" On repeat and it's great. How's the gift of prophecy treating you Casandra?

[@jjpasay]

Man, they really did a good fucking job with portraying Ai's life escaping from her body. That fucking last shot of her was so fantastically haunting. It gives me chills now even as an adult, and I'm pretty sure this is something that would traumatize kids if they saw this on TV. Now this is all from a third person perspective--as an audience. I can't imagine how Aqua must have felt, literally watching the light in Ai's eyes disappear just like that, as she slowly died while holding him close.

[@thewindysage1538]

She was actively holding Aqua so he probably stood there,in complete shock slowly feeling her body go cold until the police arrived

[@marinellovragovic1207]

​​​@@thewindysage1538that part is visually depicted in the manga even, but was not adapted for the first episode for some reason. It's shown in season 2 for the first time.

[@lordmashiro1929]

3:51:07 cue a montage of Ed giving Ruby and Aqua therapy while twitch chat hunts their father down and ends him in the most torturous way possible

[@clown-chan989]

Never have I ever thought that I'd watch a 5-hours reaction video until the very end with a normal speed, but here I am now doing exactly that. So very interesting to someone who's interested in psychology such as myself. Great job!

[@Mercure250]

About Maslow's pyramid : The fucked thing is, Ai does not meet her safety needs, but basically nobody knows except the audience (and even then... it's not 100% confirmed until the incident happens); the only one who might have had an idea is Aqua, but he didn't put 2 and 2 together (which is in part because he didn't know Ai gave their address to the father, which is the one thing that completely destroyed her safety).

[@ryanfirst761]

i knew oshi no ko was peak, but this analysis brings it into another stratosphere, god dammit take my like and sub

[@Jakokokoroko]

I don't watch you that often but I just now realized why I like your analysis so much. You treat the characters like actual people and not just as fictitious beings or even plot devices that the author put together. I really like that since I love to see people get so immersed and give the author of a story the benefit of the doubt to treat their characters with care and thought. I hate when people dismiss characters as unrealistic or stupid immediately and go on to blame the author for poor writing or something along those lines without putting any thought into thinking about why the author chose to write this character that way etc. If one can for example make an hour long video discussing the depth of one single side character then most of the time you can be sure that the author spent maybe 10 times - or even more - the amount of time thinking that character up and how to write them. So I really love your indepth dives into the story and characters where you fully immerse yourself without immediately judging the author or the characters.

[@FormerEmiliaBestWifi]

This. Last week I let my mom watch the episode 1 and it was her first time ever watching anime as well. Throughout the whole episode I peek at her once in a while to check her expressions and after *that* scene her emotion was still fairly blank (She showed a bit but not much). When I asked her why I got very upset when she said this is still fiction and the reincarnation aspect where you remember the previous life is so unrealistic and just because of that one single unrealistic aspect (in order to push the story and make the story actually unique), she said she don't see the characters real and thus she could not get emotional for a virtual character. We ended up getting into an argument that even when the characters are fictional, the writer did his best to make them the closest to real human and their actions and thoughts are what a normal person would too if they were in the same position. However she kept saying that at the end of the day she can't share emotions with someone who doesn't exist and I had no other choice but to accept the fact that she wouldn't change her mind or try to think otherwise. I really hoped that I could convey the real value of anime and change her opinion about anime in general (Since she always thought anime was for kids and kept saying I'm still having a kid's mind etc) but sadly I did not succeed.

[@Jakokokoroko]

@@FormerEmiliaBestWifi That sucks. It is sad when you try to open up about something to someone close by sharing your interests/passions with them and they just completely block you off. I hope you communicated to your mom that this was disappointing and hurtful to you since you tried to open up to her and you should let her know that the least she could do is try to empathize with your feelings even if she personally can't fully grasp or understand them. Maybe give her an example of something she feels really passionate about and ask her how she would feel if you (or her parent/s) were as dismissive of that as she was of your interests. Maybe that way she will get why you were so upset.

[@FormerEmiliaBestWifi]

@@Jakokokoroko thanks for saying that but she said if it was a documentary on the news instead of being animation with unrealistic reincarnation aspect she would cry the hell out so I don't know what to do here 💀

[@ryanpalyo8181]

Honestly, for the first ever video I've seen from you, you're amazing. The use of psychology to predict so many of the plot points for the show was crazy to watch, as well as how much you had to say about so many different things. There are plenty of reactors who use their job as a title to draw in more views, the age old "Doctor reacts to:", "Scientist reacts to:" types of people, but they never actually do more than a couple of small points about how it correlates to the show for the most part. So you getting so into it and taking notes is a real treat. Plus you're one of the most empathetic people I've watched as well, so the reaction to all those heartbreaking scenes was amazing too. Also for the MV, the rabbit costume is basically because rabbit and liar are extremely close to the same word in Japanese in pronunciation (Usagi vs Uso-tsuki), so she's basically wearing the mask of a liar. The dark/distorted portion of the song has the lyrics specifically talking about the jealousy her other group members feel about her, that she gets all the attention and they're just foils and supporters of her rise to fame, with nothing for them.

[@nicholasiglesias5937]

i love how at 3:22:30 when he's like don't be those people who only say i love you on their deathbed when your like 60-70 and then there's just a line of ... because they knew what was about to happen

[@TheEsutan]

2:11:20 "man im so excited to see how she evolves and what kind of mom she'll be" OOOOOO BABYYYY

[@hiiamelecktro4985]

I cried while reading the manga, I cried while watching the anime and I nearly cried watching this video. I’m not usually even that much of a crier 😭

[@johnydsmithson6834]

We had a severely disabled pediatric we'd run multiple a month. Usually a xoponex Rx and he was good for a week or two and Mom would send us on the way. A year of frequently interacting with this kid and his mom, well one day he went so critical we had to tube him and he lost pulses prior to hospital. We worked him for half an hour and the ED did so to. Even years later mom still stops by the station to thank us and give gifts and we visit annually to pay respect on his birthday. He was 11 by time he passed away. Definitely feel that empathy and connection shown in the show.

[@sarahhutchinson5720]

The scene with Ruby dancing really speaks to me as well, i cry almost everytime. I have fibromyalgia and some days im in so much pain all i can do is watch anime. I used to be very active, i did ballet, and now it feels like my body has betrayed me. It wont do what i want it to. It wont move without pain. To be able to dance again, i would give a lot of things.

[@kiiturii]

4:56:00 the two Ai's I think represented her private hidden self, and her public charismatic self, hence one being bright and colored, while the other is far less saturated and greyscaled

[@SSName]

Stumbled upon this channel and damn this is good. Not even 3 minutes in and he mentioned doctors learning niche/weeb culture from their patients' own interests BEFORE we even get the reveal that Gorou is a total idol fan precisely because of Sarina, his patient! And that's not even getting to the other aspects he predicts. I had read all the manga before the announcement of an anime, and I now have an interest in seeing how this guy will react to *later scenes*. Certified Wizard

[@Wipovoxx]

Someone posted this video a couple of days ago in the Oshi No Ko subreddit and that is how I found your channel. I've just finished watching the video and I wanted to say that I loved it, it has helped me understand the characters way better and to appreciate the show even more (of course crying again with the rewatch). Thank you for making this content and I can't wait for your analysis of the rest of the episodes!

[@freemovies411]

Usually watching a psychologist or a therapist react to stuff, it's usually with this cold, uninterested demeanor. But the way you do it, with empathy and humor, is really refreshing to see! Thanks so much for sharing, can't wait to watch the rest during my quiet hours! ^^

[@zearow5458]

This episode broke me for a couple of days. Ai is such a tragic character. Also that name she has was such a good choice for what her story is based around and ends with.

[@Zikiru]

Aaaaaaaaaand subscribe. Your analysis was on point for the most part. I can't help but grin at your Ed and Evil Ed rant. Tickled my spaghetti you call a brain.

[@-butterfly-594]

I just found your channel and I'm absolutely loving your discussions!!! You have such a precise and accurate read on these characters and the importance of all their actions. I'm only partway through this reaction, but the way you questioned Ai's facade so quickly and saw through to what she was really struggling with... I already know that you're gonna have amazing insights to say about this series.

[@psyculturists]

Glad you found the channel and you’re liking it !!❤️ But honestly the show is amazing and my line of questioning is only possible because of how well written the show is.

[@kiiturii]

@@psyculturists makes me so happy to hear you say this.. Ever since I first watched it I thought the writing was genius, but I've heard so many anime fans crtizise the writing specifically and I just never understood that. Aka Akasaka is soo good at writing characters, I swear I've cried so much to his works even during scenes that have nothing sad happening in them, just characters interacting and being happy, especially in kaguya-sama

[@minidiamantl5462]

when a person takes notes during this, you know he's about to say some real deep, accurate analysis. This man just looks at eveything and predicts them so well it's so good and spot on. (sorry if I edit these comments on the way, I am still currently watching, and I'm subscribing too.)

[@minidiamantl5462]

The worst part, is that as someone who watched the episode and the manga, his analysis just makes me profoundly shiver.

[@minidiamantl5462]

This is also a proof psychology is a a real job for anyone that didn't think so.

[@minidiamantl5462]

i'm sorry but: 2:04:35 is too much coincidence, I officially agree, you are a wizard.

[@bilbibil]

This really gives a great insight into the well-written tragic story of a character. Honestly, I can't keep up to watching the series because it always leaves a huge hole in my heart that grows heavier every time I think about it. At first, I had this unexplained grudge about Ai's decisions, which put her future, career, and her kids' lives at great risk just because she felt greedy for what she thought was true love. Then, this breakdown video really explains a lot about why her flawed decisions come from her mental issues, and I feel empathy towards how vulnerable she is, yet she remains determined to pursue her desires. Now, all that's left is this feeling of sadness that can't be changed because it's just part of the story where someone takes away her dreams. I have to admit, this story is so good that I can't continue without feeling pain. My heart is so weak... help

[@name-nam]

the twist hasnt happened yet, and i already enjoy the reaction update: im subscribed now. this is fantastic. i didnt know how much i would learn from a psychologist reacting to this, but the way you connect the dots before they even appear... man. im also learning some stuff that i could reflect on to myself, so thank you 🧡

[@psyculturists]

Awww thank you so much! Honestly thanks for giving it a chance I know 5 hour videos can be daunting but I try to make them as a way for people to learn about themselves while analyzing these wonderful characters ❤️

[@name-nam]

@@psyculturists it is quite daunting. though i generally watch most youtube videos at 2× speed so its a bit less daunting for me i guess😅. but still, i wouldnt usually watch a reaction video thats an hour long, and im glad i got interested enough to watch this. ill definitely check out your other videos and the next episodes of oshi no ko if youd be uploading reactions again🧡

[@missinglegs]

I clicked because I couldn't believe the length and I think I'm gonna stay for it, because holly heck, that is so impressive for a reaction

[@johnydsmithson6834]

Jesus how deep you break this down and predict the holistic hints of every single detail fires me up! I could've used this channel sooner! I nerd out on this stuff deeply and utilize all my empathy to engage as if it's real when I find a show good enough to warrant it. Seeing your breakdowns absolutely are wonderful. Our Artistisms align brother

[@TheMonotonePuppet]

“Do you love yourself?” No. A 100% no. Zero hesitation. I didn’t even need to think about it. Absolutely *NOT*. My self-loathing is as crystal-clear and evident as the oceans. It is the clearest emotion I can feel at the moment. Everything else is muddled.

[@pudinkeviar4151]

me looking at the vid duration before clicking on it: "bro reacted to the whole season already"💀

[@zenrythebard5587]

First thing I've ever watched from you and... dude you are a wizard.

[@samyakdhartuladhar8437]

Brother.... this reaction video... welp shoulda expected it

[@NotSomeJustinWithoutAMoustache]

Thanks for the awesome reaction and analysis Psy!! Wow, I didn't think about it but it makes perfect sense a psychologist or psychiatrist would be perfect to react to this anime. I really appreciate your professional insight, it really adds a lot to and further expounds upon this already amazing pilot episode. I feel like I understand like it more than I already had. Thank you Ed.

[@NotSomeJustinWithoutAMoustache]

I'm really curious with this reaction and with your insights. I think a vsauce reaction could be cool (I personally recommend illusions of time or a mindfield episode, but I'd be fine if you picked whichever one interested you the most too), or maybe a One Piece readthrough since it also has quite the brutal stories (although it is quite long). Something closer to this series for you might be 1-nen a gumi no Monster though. The premise is completely different, and besides maybe One Piece these ones don't really hit as hard as Oshi no Ko does in my opinion, but I think with your background you'd likely really enjoy any of the 3 recommendations.

[@ikiyou_]

Oh, god... the last lyrics in the MV were the exact same last words she said to her kids right before she died... 6th time watching this and still cried. Read the manga 3 times, watched the anime and cried, watched the MV and cried, watched this and STILL cried.

[@SylinarMctavish]

All I can say is… you’ll see how all of this affects Aqua and Ruby through out the story and how it’s shaped their characters. Your worries and fears and predictions, you’ll see how it all pans out.

[@AHeroWith1000Names]

I didn't regret a single second of this 5-hour monstrosity. Such a densely thoughtful, caring, and insightful analysis, not only psychologically but also character writing-wise!!

[@lucaspoon4202]

I've always thought to myself how like.. writing takes having lived a life. Writing people and stories, when at its best, takes understanding them. Ppl in the chat call it wizardry how Ed can break down the characters so in depth and predicting where it would all go, but if he's a wizard, then so is the writer. Not so inconceivable now... Writers need to be able to think through the minds of their characters. From their protagonists to the stalker. From babies being reborn to their heroine, to them losing that heroine and how they'd deal with it. Writing must be tough lol. It's paradoxical (I think that would be the word here). You treat your characters as beings u grow attached to or hateful of, but also as chess pieces to communicate your voice because you write for an audience. If characters need to suffer to make that happen. If they need to die or to lose someone... ofc some succeed and feel happiness, but no meaningful story can be told where every character lives painless lives. Cuz thats a story that doesn't exist about a world that doesn't exist. To be a writer is to be fate in your story. Thats my thought at least and it most definitely can tie into psychology.

[@Vedhon]

Seeing you break down this anime really makes me appreciate how much Akasaka really put effort into this story

[@originaldarkwater]

About 6 months ago, I watched your Bocchi The Rock reactions and was constantly amazed by your ability to predict exactly where the show was going to go, sometimes even episodes in advance. I see you haven't lost a step in the mean time! WIZARD!

[@drarp]

Hey there! From reading the comments, it seems like new people have found (and loved) your channel. That's amazing, they're in for some amazing content and a great pal. Wish you a great weekend!! 😁

[@midtaku5379]

Holy shit, I just wanted to see people's reactions on oshi no ko but goodamn when I saw 4 hours I was like WTFF????! And holy shit I watched this in for atleast 2 hours now with skips to scenes I'm curious on how you reacted and good damn I love how you predict almost everything easily saying this is all just basic psycology.... This is my first time diving in and I am so comfy just watching this and not think of anything. Like this video is so comfy to just watch for no reason and I love how you just say your thoughts, And your jokes is also so funny like damn. I'm suddenly having interest on psycology just in this video alone. "Pls dont be those mom's who are in their death bed saying I love you for the first time"... Oh... pfft- When I tell you as I heard that, I had to pause the video and scream in my pillow. Also love how as Aqua was planning to kill his father, you are just like... no no child, you don't do that, I can fix you, no need for you to do that 😊. nevermind it is indeed not 4 hours but friking 5 hours basically.. Aint ima continue watching the rest soon. Thank you for giving me a interesting video to serve as a somewhat bedtime story.

[@gaboratoria]

crazy how akasaka(the author) managed to make this so real that a psychologist can actually analyze it

[@dead3716]

I know you're a psychologist, but the amount of stuff you predicted blows my mind. I'm looking forward to your analysis for the future episodes!

[@dalmationblack]

A pretty minor spoiler (from chapter 75) that further contextualizes Aqua's trauma (though don't read if you don't want to): (I say minor because it's mentioned in passing and doesn't have large plot implications only character ones) Aqua's mother died giving birth to him in his first life. This is the second time he's lost a mother.

[@whyyoumadbro2370]

It also makes sense why he was so fixated on his promise of delivering Ai's children safely.

[@precioustories03]

@@whyyoumadbro2370 Oh, that's alsot hreason he chose OBGyne as his main specialty training in his first life.That particular field of medicine (obstetrics=OB) deals with making sure that mothers delivering thier babies safely as much as possible.

[@teyxen]

@@precioustories03 It's worth pointing at that this wasn't his own reason for it - he wanted to be a surgeon. But when his grandparents learnt he was becoming a doctor, they believed that it was to help mothers safely deliver their babies, and he felt pressured to follow that.

[@klyngdoh]

Hey man, just found you from this reaction. I've been a big fan of the manga, and having done about a year of therapy, though I've stopped for a while now, I've been very interested in the process of it and psychology in general as well, mostly to try and understand myself as an adult now. A lot of what you touch on in the video (like avoidant behaviour, the needs at various stages in life table etc) has really helped me figure out some things in my own life and where I need help dealing with it in therapy. Don't stop going in-depth into things like this, I'd love to see more of this kind of content.

[@IZEASGT]

I’ve been hesitating to start this reaction series because going down the rabbit hole of your Apothecary Diaries reactions threw my schedule completely out of whack, and this playlist has over 48 hours of footage. Well, one video down, plus the beginning of your ep2 reactions up to the reveal of Aqua’s lie, and I’m looking forward to seeing what you’ve had to say about all that’s come since. I also see you’ve read “45510”, so I’m also interested to see how that shaped your reading of “Idol”. (The ending is _so_ quietly cruel, even though nobody but the narrator will ever know what she does.) I might even be able to make it for a bit of this Friday’s stream, though I’ll have to log off for Shabbat. Thinking about the breakdown of Ai’s psyche, and how she has more red flags than her fans have red glowsticks… man, you’re not wrong about getting her out of the idol industry, but it’s SUCH a tall ask. She knows how much her fans love “Ai”, and how many of them there are. And IchigoPro is a small indie agency, and her star power is what’s carrying the group more than anything else, so whether anyone says anything or not, that’s so much pressure to keep going, from all sides. AND she probably knows how hard it is for ex-idols to stay in the industry, AND even if a rational analysis suggests she can manage it she has existing abandonment trauma amplifying the fear she can’t (as I’m sure you’ve since noticed with Kana and Abiko), AND she probably only has a middle-school education, AND her idol career is practically all she’s known since she was 12, AND she has two pre-schoolers to provide for. It’s a perfect storm of carrots and sticks to keep her chasing the thing that’s bad for her. The best option I can think of would be for her to start pushing Ichigo to make changes to how B Komachi works, make it a more balanced group - focus on lifting up the other girls to bring them closer to her level, take her out of the center position. And in the meantime, have her take on jobs that are more distant from typical idol fare - I don’t know whether it’d be acting, or solo non-idol music, but something. Would she have time to take classes to study for the high-school equivalency exam? I dunno, but she needs some kind of off-ramp, and she needs to know the careers of a dozen other people won’t collapse without her. Given the whole fetishization-of-innocence thing, there’s something very grim about the fact that Ai dies the day she turns 20, which until 2022 was the age of majority in Japan. In a very twisted way, it cements her legacy as the perfect idol. She never got wrinkles or gray hair; she never declined from the heights of a Tokyo Dome concert. Lived fast, died young, left a beautiful corpse - at least, in the minds of the public, who didn’t see the sickeningly hollow smile left after her light went out, like Aqua did.

[@I3ladeDragon]

Such a quick turnaround! Huge props to the editing team!

[@TheZedric]

I had just discovered your ep. 6 reaction/analysis video and stopped 5 minutes in to start watching from this first episode watch. This was so thought provoking to experience so I am definitely going to watch and catch up to the rest! Thank you for also performing an analysis/case study after watching, you are doing good work. Cheers

[@johnydsmithson6834]

The EYES. This is something I never seen anyone talk about. The Christian moral pathways are the left (sin), the narrow center (the path of Jesus), and right path (the way of God's word). In AQUA'S perception, when HE looks in a mirror, he sees the star in his RIGHT eye, he sees he's on the holy path. But when WE are watching on screen, if we took a picture of him and put it next to the three paths, Aqua is actually on the LEFT path. Aqua himself sees himself on the right path, while viewees we see Aqua on the outside on the left path. There is so much detail to this show, and so much symbolism, even Ai refers to herself "Look at me dancing, I'm (mother) Maria", and Ruby refers to Ai having had a virgin birth. I think it was intentional and highly symbolic and I'm awe struck by the writer and curious why no one has mentioned this.

[@dtfd_]

I'm really happy youtube suggested this video. I laughed and cried with you while watching it, and it meant a lot to me. It made me realize I should probably look into getting therapy.

[@Deimos4500]

Other thing about the macrosystem and why the Idol job Opportunity was given to her was a "bliss for her" is that in Japan, the core family is so important socially, social believes, that their are embedded on burocrasy and legal stuff; most orphans that can't find earlier a family to be parte of, had it really hard to make throu life and not only mental y but to be able to get necessary legal papers to be able to get a Good job or Good advanced education (college, university, diplomas)

[@sullen1]

I have to say, I literally just discovered your channel and I've fell in love! Absolutely top notch!!!

[@Azure8Note]

Hi, super late to the party, but what was in the Manga and not here is that Aqua "chose" to stop therapy by acting okay. Of course as adults they should have seen he definitely needed more but Aqua did it to not worry his new guardians. So his memories of being older and adult ethics of not being a burden really screwed him over this time

[@sfj4u]

First timer here and i must say your reviews are on another level you deserve more subs frr

[@sfj4u]

Ok how did I not discover your channel earlier its full of gem

[@nekonochesire6023]

This was great to watch, didn't expect to enjoy the reaction and analysis this much. One thing I want to point out though for Ai is that her manager/producer do legitimately care for her (before moving to the apartment she was living with him and his wife) so even in case where she'd have to drop out of her idol career she would still have a support system.

[@abednego_1254]

your analysis is like an unintentional foreshadowing. really good!

[@LusterCandy18]

Man, no matter how much I see it it still hurts. It was a fun stream and I learned a lot so I'm really looking forward to the upcoming episodes!

[@gzuzumaki2]

As someone who has been reading the manga for a very long time, I had absolute chills this entire stream on how accurate you were on predicting things about the character relationships despite this only being the first episode or some characters not having been introduced yet. Things haven’t happened in the anime yet, but you still got it all down to a tee.

[@priestesslucy]

4:33:40 Being a mother _is pure amazingness_ and any gachikoi who wants to say otherwise is full of shit.

[@kiiturii]

I can't believe this chat was about to spoil her death literally less than a minute before it happens

[@genericsidecharacter8915]

This man was able to predict so much in this show it’s insane!!!!! But there was one twist that he couldn’t predict😭😭😭. It hurt every time he talked about how excited he was for Ai’s future. But he did completely predict how Aqua would react to it.

[@m4y013]

Yeah as a manga reader aqua is the most self destructive siscon I've ever seen in any piece of media and it's all feel real there's not once anyone will taught why he go down this path because they already know why

[@ElianaMCP]

I wasn't expecting this upload so soon. This was a very well deserved analysis

[@Horesmi]

You mentioned spirituality in your analysis. To us, their prank where Aqua and Ruby pretend to be messengers of the gods is a funny comedy routine. But form their point of view... To the people who were literally reincarnated, divine intervention makes perfect sense. Perhaps this is why Ruby talks about virgin birth with a straight face - maybe she's not naive, but just sees their birth as that unique. It's a concept that's not quite as explored, but in general, reincarnation is likely to have a profound effect on your spirituality. This contrasts sharply with the seemingly secular worldview of Ai. Idk how processing trauma is affected by believing you are a literal messenger of the gods, but it's probably related somehow, right?

[@yaboi7232]

oshi no ko fans when they hear "I love you" instant trauma

[@enigmagrieshaber5555]

Even me when I read the manga 2 years ago I thought this is just an Idol Show 😂 but after reading the part where Ai died I take a break for about 4 days before continuing 😢

[@kepstin]

So, I think it's really impressive how all your analysis ends up predicting future events in the show - not just the analysis itself, but I think that it really points out how much care and thought the creators put into the the characters and story, in order to give the characters a lot of believable detail and ensuring that their actions reflect how people would actually behave in the circumstances they're placed into. But then I got to 2:04:15 and I'm a believer now. You really are a wizard.

[@moonlightsonata3682]

Before watching the clip, I saw 5 hour and couldn't believe my eyes. NICE!!

[@paps3060]

Now that you've seen episode one, I think there's a lot of symbolism in the eyes. Of course there's the obvious design choice to make them visually 'their mother's children' but it also shows how they're each a different half of the whole of the 'legacy of Hoshino Ai'. As well as they're not complete without one another. What I didn't notice until watching it animated was how powerful their non-star eyes are. If one eye carries the memory of Ai's life, the other is to remember her death. The scene where the stars in her eyes faded and disappeared. Having their eyes be half and half shows that they're not as entirely full of hope and energy and drive as Ai was, not entirely. Their sparks are half-dead.

[@paps3060]

second comment, but i love how many visual symbols there are for Ai's eyes (heh) in this episode alone. there was the first star of the night, not just the brightest and 'most beautiful', but also happening to be Venus of all planets. as well as disappearing from the sky at hear passing, which is an interesting inversion of the 'you become a star in the sky when you die'. but also, and i find this far more striking, the shadow on the floor at Ai's feet during the first on-screen idol performance (B-Komachi's post-rebirth) from the lights from so many directions. it's like that scene wants to say that her eyes are shining not just with the brightness of a star, but with the comparable brightness of her own presence on stage

[@psyculturists]

Didn’t even notice that one good observation!!

[@sakuralily5907]

I just finished this epic video after multiple viewings, love your reaction and analysis! You're very fun to listen to.

[@ImpulseGundam]

I am glad I came across this video. It helped me process my complex feelings on Episode 1. I had been in a terrible headspace, maybe even trauma, due to it. Never cried so hard and still do when I rewatched it here, even though I read the manga. After this, I've realized I'm not alone in the hurt it's caused others and I've also been lacking to take care of my mental health. This VOD is allowing me to heal. Liked and Subscribed.

[@DeadForDeadForBote]

This is the best reaction, plua analysis for anime I ever seen!

[@cambaez1777]

Omg, I just discovered this channel and I'm a psychology as well. It's good to see someone who has the same perspective because the first episode and the Akane one broke me, and made me analyze everything and the industry. Good reaction!"

[@TMFlesh]

There's a great play on words in naming her Ai which means Love in Japanese so whenever she talks about true love, real love, or love that isn't a lie you can also interpret it as her true self, her real self, or herself that isn't a lie.

[@leonsdx]

Just watched the whole Vid in one sitting while at work (really made my day). I'm so happy I found your channel after seeing your twitter threads here and there. It's eye opening to see you verbalize the underlying issues and traumas they go through. I went from liking and relating to a characters actions to UNDERSTANDING them. Definitely gonna try and catch these live; much love to you man.

[@downnice95]

The manga is currently fullt exploring Ai and you were spot on.

[@palmerharrison7660]

Thank you for doing the full analysis on Ai, it was wonderful.

[@Tarien001]

This was so educational and fun to watch (except for the ending). I'm really looking forward to your reaction to the next episodes of Oshi no ko. There are interesting themes and quite complex characters, and I would love to see a closer analysis on them.

[@cardinal8200]

I clicked on the video cause I thought the mental health perspective might be cool to listen to for a little, I did not expect myself to watch that full thing, great information and crazy how you called out so many things before they happened

[@zephdoesthings]

I had to find a five hour block to watch this, but I knew it was going to be solid gold

[@laplace8461]

Actual shadow director, Thanks for the reaction!

[@cipper12]

I'm so looking forward to you analyzing this series ❤❤❤ Can't wait for next week!

[@psyculturists]

Thank you! I can’t wait to see where this series takes us!! Super excited to continue analyzing it

[@فاطمهقاسماف]

It was really good and interesting analysis , im gonna be honest in manga everything is really really get darker and darker in any ways can anyone imagine ( advice from manga reader ) , and as someone i lost a family member ( two years ago a mother) after so many ways to distract myself with my hobbies ( reading books or watching) this really heartbreaking for me but i don't stop to re watch it because kinda Ai death reminds me of my mother's death ( she was seek but there was chance to recovery for her and almost get better and suddenly BooM she was gone and i was shocked ( man i really feel empathy with twins about their mom's death) like almost as same as Ai finally her life almost getting better and went good and BOM she was gone and the worst part is not for dead person its for a survivor people ( i feel guilty about why am i alive and hate myself event if others around me cares about or nice ) for god sake im sure both of the twins will get revenge for their mother in the end and i really will support them ( based on how manga chapters are going now )

[@eksdee6121]

Just discovered your channel today and Im absolutely blown away at how amazingly accurate your analysis is (You really are a wizard!) Will defs be subscribed and watching your future videos!

[@azureNotsure]

AHHH 5 HOURS. I really need to watch the episode already, then I can feast

[@Ncyphen]

Regarding the eyes, they are a representation of a person's passion. Ai had passion for being an idol, to inspire other through her lies. For Ruby and Aqua, their passion is with Ai.

[@drakehellstone208]

Man this show caused me a pain but a pain that i must and i will overcome I appreciate so much your content. I mean it's kinda a way to relearn who am i establish my goal straight and go forward. This society is breaking us way too fast man... Keep it strong bro

45 minutes in and my god im loving that you pause and discuss your thoughts. Ill see if I can join you live.

[@missinglegs]

Fuck man, watching this has been like an entirely different experience from just seeing the episode... I've always been a fan of psychology, but this analysis was on a whole another level... and the conversation you had there at the end of the episode with as you called it "Evil Ed"! Just chills, literal chills!

[@jqstat]

Bro dove in and analyzed the characters better than the author/s.

[@YakirIT]

The amount of correct predictions in this video is truly amazing. Thats just mind blowing how much you can predict with Psychology. Keep up the good work!