"That's why you're dating a CRIMINAL!" - Financial Transparency & Compatibility in a Relationship

[@shayjewels6204]

It’s the topic, it’s the clear skin, it’s the hair slayage, it’s the sisterhood for me 😍👏🏼👏🏼

[@nosiphomadlala3918]

Many black woman have this mindset that they cant find a man who is both financially well off and still treats them like a queen and now you get woman who put up through hell because their man has money. Finding or wanting a man with money should be one of your requirements not the ONLY ONE!

[@zenitsutanjiro8356]

THIS IT IT!!!👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@jacqueline8566]

The thing with the “Birkin tax bracket” is that it is more than just having the cash to buy it. It’s actually worse! You actually have to spend tens or hundreds thousands on another items before Hermes will even offer you the most desired Birkin bag ... it’s really a different level.

[@shaniramsale5324]

Can we talk about ‘Toxic Faith’, particularly in Christianity. I have seen people who don’t want to take their kids to the hospital because of their faith in prayer, or people who would rather starve than miss the opportunity to give to the church and its leaders.

[@ron-dilacey6527]

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@LaCréé.e]

This is going to be gooood! Financial abundance is no longer a criteria for dating a man. It has become THE ONLY thing that matters to the point of accepting whatever if the guy is rich. Quavo and most rappers or rich guys literally buy their girlfriends into relationships.

[@michelle-zy5mo]

"Logistically, your finger smell" DEAD LMFAO

[@ad2094]

My thing is there a reason rich women were fighting for the right to work (poorer women were always working lol). To have no funds and be entirely taken care of is to be a CHILD. Your life is entirely in the other's hands, and the longer you are out of the workforce the lower the earnings you can command if that doesn't work out. So many women slide out of marriage into extreme poverty, or you stay there taking abuse because you cannot move without his money. This is not desirable and it's not smart. Your partner should be stable but even if he can afford to take care of everything, you shouldn't be okay with that imo. The power imbalance is too much and this is a partnership.

[@blessedwithcolour]

I loved listening to this whilst studying Japanese haha. I honestly don't have much to say due to lack of experience but you both are so knowledgeable and entertaining. I could listen to you both all day!!!

[@jjbbe1]

I just finished listening on Spotify and had to shimmy my way over to the comments section, to see what all my good sis had to say! I'm actually excited to have this conversation with my partner later on. We've never really had a deep financial conversation and we live together, he recently asked me to help him better manage his finances because I'm "so good at managing my own" so I feel like some of the points you ladies brought up, I'll 100% be using in our conversation later.

[@MiyzP]

In my honest opinion, I feel financial stability should be a basic requirement when it comes to dating/relationship. If you are still a work in progress in that regards, you have no business dating (point blank period). Notwithstanding that, character and the usual pre-requisite stuff is a must. Once you hit 30, I feel some things are no longer negotiable. I always offer to pay for my meal however 90% of the time, the man always pays with no further expectation. Date with no further expectation, gather your data as you converse and continue to apply common sense with a sprinkle of discernment ✨ Also ladies a man who can afford to buy your attention with material things has options so they never remain faithful. I feel the entitlement of this generation is ridiculous. As a bf/gf you really have no business expecting your partner to buy you luxury items. Allow things to flow organically.

[@glenglen9958]

I am the same I just feel like I can’t put my faith and trust in someone having financial control. I want a person who is a financial stable but I want that for me as well like both ways. I do not mind him paying but I always offer my parents always taught me bring enough to cover two peoples bills. I love being treated and spoiled but I have never expected or and as much as I receive I give back. I think when it’s a shared experience it’s a complete one as no one feels used or taken advantage off. I feel the independence I have built though will not allow me too just close my eyes financially and let someone take care of me. I need transparency it’s so wild that some of my friends are so reliant on there partners to buy them things or send them money. I loved the freedom of never asking any of my past partners for money but being able to spend my own money on what I want, when I want it without asking anyone but myself. As well as that having a supportive partner who supports what ever I choose to spend my money on.

[@MiyzP]

@@glenglen9958 That’s a sensible mindset to have. Some people expect castles yet they cannot even bring a bridge to link to that castle. Money is power. It also provides security which is often taken for granted. I’m not demanding something i myself cannot provide for my self and more. I enjoy being pampered because i treat myself on a regular basis. If a man I’m exclusively dating , has a problem with that, he can loose my number respectfully. The idea that black women shouldn’t demand financial stability and a healthy relationship as a prerequisite irks my soul. I am not getting on That poverty train again. A person’s character is their currency and I would never dispute that , however your finances also provides you with stability . They should go hand in hand at this point. I feel with dating, you have to cut your coat according to your material.

[@simone4274]

When I came across these podcast it took me about 45 sec to subscribe 😍😍😍 the content the community needs

[@tomysisters]

We love to see it! Welcome sis ❤️

[@tacrewgirl]

Thanks for the Adella video about influencers. I love learning about other black KZbinrs. Great talk about finding compatibility.

[@neosekano9936]

There’s always something to learn HERE! 🤗🤗

[@sarahzulu21]

Okay y’all are taking my study time😭😭😭😭😭

[@neosekano9936]

Thanks you Sisters. 🥺❤️

[@qnd_20]

:this episode could have not come at a right time than now💯 Another incredible episode ladies❤️.

[@deneadonis2240]

Just discovered you beautiful sisters and I have been listening to all the talks. So insightful and entertaining, thank you Queens!

[@silibazisomupereki]

I relate on this dilemma so much. I create content for students and me being the helper that I am, I tend to over extend myself, and sometimes it becomes burden some on me sometimes when I have to help "fix" my subscribers situations. Creating that boundary can be hard, especially when you are guilt tripped. I love the community I have created and I don't mind helping but drawing that limit has been hard.

[@andreamay7539]

Two intelligent women 😍 we love to see it

[@onetallgirl1369]

From my experience, men want a women on the level, men usually want someone who has their own thing and they feel like they can sustain themselves and not a women they want to rescue. My ex is a doctor and I am a premed student. even though I am on my way to becoming a doctor, he still questioned my motives of being with him because I was not yet a doctor. He thought maybe I was just with them for the money ( even though I was not). We had other problems in our relationship, but I feel like that is a factor when men look for a women. Real men, respectable men with good character are not looking to save a women, they want a partner.

[@tacrewgirl]

Rewatching. Learning new things. Thanks. I've heard the term parasocial relationships quite a bit lately. Loving the quotes. People are looking for a paycheck in the formb of a spouse.

[@Aisha-xt1ui]

subscribed so quickly, loved this

[@silibazisomupereki]

Yoh, this converstion is power and fire🔥🔥🔥

[@plamedi893]

Renee is an entire comedian omddd

[@Terrencetulani]

Renee is a sister I never had

[@MimiMoments]

I have definitely given my number to a follower. It was emotionally overwhelming.

[@curiousclusterofatoms]

Why did I spend 5 minutes laughing at this title! I am ready to indulge thank you!☕️

[@kevinmalloy1978]

Great conversation. I just subscribed. It is good hearing a different perspective that is intelligent, thought out, and communicated well instead of the average KZbin clickbait.

[@tomysisters]

Glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate it so much 🙏🏽

[@Wetesk53]

The standard for men in this community is already lodged in the nooks and crannies of hell. I'm wary of any conversation urging women to be more reasonable lol. Reasonable is already a gutter low bar... Set the bar HIGH ladies, you might not exactly reach it but you'll end up with a far better outcome that just going into the dating market raw and "reasonable"...

[@1ditl]

😭😭😭

[@modeenyo]

To be reasonable is to be fair.

[@Wetesk53]

@@modeenyo There's NO such thing as "fair". It doesn't exist. The world is completely UNFAIR babes, deal with it...

[@kindred42]

@@Wetesk53 I think thats the real issue. Black Women have a reflective knee jerk reaction to these conversations because of the TRAUMA...unhealthy relationships with money, past unresolved abuse in their families, within dating relationships etc.. ..We expereince this through how we're treated by the black men in our community and how the outer community treats us as well. If we're speaking from a socioeconomic cishetero point of view. TALK ABOUT THAT LADIES...yes the world is not fair....its not going to get fairer because you're ...since we're keeping it real ...youre still black....and woman...and other marginalizations depending on the person. But being obsessed with finding a man to take care of you....is not going to balance those scales when the scales are already unbalanced for you. Deal with that pain first....stop veiling it as dating or financial advice.

[@Wetesk53]

@@kindred42 LMAO... I'm convinced intellectual moralists like you just love to use big words and hearing the sound of your own blasé talking points. You're projecting... nobody mentioned "pain" babes, and "TRAUMA" is a human condition no one can escape. None of that should stop ANY woman seeking the best possible option for herself in all areas of her life. We can walk and chew gum at the same damn time 😊.

[@chidinmaaham-neze6401]

Please I laughed on this episode but y'all spoke facts per usual!

[@TemiDansoArt]

Not a credit score of 1 🤣

[@akuaagyemfra5433]

Review BLUE THERAPY!!!

[@Lucylu723]

11:46 To answer your question of who should pay on the first date, personally I think it should be the person that organised the date, whether male or female. It's not so much the case of you *must* pay, but more so you are liable in this situation to pay however if you request to split the bill then I don't mind. But if I was invited to go on a date and was asked to pay for it, best believe that's the last time you're seeing me hmmmmkkkayyyyy😗😉

[@Abimbola.Abioye]

I loved every bit of this episode!!!! Thank you!!!

[@winifredisaac8222]

I love you guys so much ❤️❤️

[@gloriakanani1026]

You speak facts. I love your channel ❤️❤️

[@tomysisters]

❤️❤️

[@mars9842]

She said wearing it like wrestlemania omg I’m dead 😂

[@ylite9550]

B.E.A.U.T.I.F.U.L Women, and speaking facts! love the channel!

[@laverderslemonade]

Do you ask before ordering or after dinner to split the check? I’m so awkward 😅 do I just ask for his cashapp?

[@tomysisters]

You gotta pretend to reach for the purse after the bill comes sis 💀

[@essencekk]

Women expecting gifts is on par with men expecting 🐱 Men have set the rules to this game. Let's not out the cart before the horse. Men who court the Saweetie's and City Girls' of the world know this. The Birkin convo is not about the average man, it is regarding men who are accessible to Ss and CGs.

[@emilyencapsulated9540]

Courtney, where did you get your jumper? It's cute 😌

[@tomysisters]

Asos! ❤️

[@nosiphosithole6187]

The I keep quoting "This Is It!" on a daily🙈🙈

[@tomysisters]

We love to see it 😂

[@wanjanjama]

Extreme cheapskates were actually on something 😂😂😂 There was even one that claimed to be a millionaire but was haggling for flights

[@jay1603]

Re: bill paying on a date, and maybe this is because I'm bisexual so there isn't always a man in the date, but I think whoever asked/planned the date pays for the date the first time. After that point, if you continue to date, you work out financial dynamics to your budget and comfort level.

[@amis1198]

This was absolutely funnnnnnnnny!!!!

[@BEBEBUTTER]

Great Ladiesx

[@Adanmadu]

Courtney unfailingly cracks me up 😂 #ImScreaming

[@vivian8130]

leave the soundcloud as side hustle atleast lol

[@tomysisters]

😆 😆 right?!

[@neosekano9936]

Let’s Go 🚀🚀

[@candacecastle6055]

This was very good...but I internally screamed on "You smell!"-One square?...Unholy!

[@tomysisters]

😂 😂 😂 crying!

[@Terrencetulani]

Renee is a sister we never had. She is just there dropping wisdom. She is not mad at the world or men. She is just honest with herself and all of us. Her mantra is " take these conversations offline and bring it to the people around you " People online say what they think you want to hear but they won't look at your context. They generalise situations. So toxic. Renee = legend

[@noellieulda5224]

for me, on the first date the guy pays, because who asked you on a date?

[@ShalisaCordilia]

Yayyy!!!✨

[@fifunmioluwajana2186]

Nah y’all need to explain the choice of hashtags😭🤣

[@tomysisters]

we ain't got nothing to say ma'am 😂 😂 😂

[@EvakarenMuriithi]

💛💛🇰🇪🇰🇪

[@laverderslemonade]

It’s called extreme cheapskates lol

[@idi.h5460]

People are very weird lol

[@amberthomas388]

Omg! Get to the point!!!!!