Heal Trauma & Chaos: How To Declutter Every Part Of Your Life Starting Today! | Dr. Ramani

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Dr Rangan Chatterjee

Dr Rangan Chatterjee

Күн бұрын

Download my FREE Habit Change Guide HERE: bit.ly/3QKGGFW
Whether it’s the inability to stick to our health goals, leave a toxic relationship, or get that promotion, we often seem to be our own worst enemies. Self-sabotage is a spectrum of feelings, beliefs, and behaviours, but they all set us up to fail.
#feelbetterlivemore
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Show notes available at: drchatterjee.com/332
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Should I Stay or Should I Go: Surviving A Relationship with a Narcissist amzn.to/3RlYJT3
#feelbetterlivemore #feelbetterlivemorepodcast
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The US version, How to Make Disease Disappear is available via amzn.to/2Gj1YEL
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Listen to all previous podcast episodes on drchatterjee.com/podcast or via these podcast platforms by searching for 'Feel Better, Live More'.
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DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast and on this webpage is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

Пікірлер: 626
@janedoe09
@janedoe09 Жыл бұрын
Amazing!!! I'm almost 70 and everyday is 'computer, care for cat, stupid eating' and not much else when "I Know" I'd be so much better if I got dressed, went for a walk. I am just tired. Time goes by faster and faster, I stay up until 4am and slept until 1pm today. I live alone, have a son, he's doing his thing, no friends or family. Thank You So Much for your compassion and clear explanation!
@denasharpe2393
@denasharpe2393 Жыл бұрын
I think that l am you....living kind of uselessly at 75 but l do want to accomplish something before l'm excused from this life.....
@Renee847
@Renee847 Жыл бұрын
Look around, someone needs you and your talents.. volunteer
@annetaylor7496
@annetaylor7496 Жыл бұрын
70 is not old, but if you're slowing down and thinking negatively you will be old. Try and switch things around,have more of a routine it makes a huge difference. You must must have a purpose, like I said 70 can be the start of some amazing things. Don't give up, are you interested in volunteering some where, if you love animals you could volunteer at a shelter, look in to different courses, what do you like to do or still want to do. Join a community house in your area or out of your area. There are so many interesting things and projects you can do. Just setting out in a daily walk is so beneficial for your body and especially your mind, think if anything you might like to do, support groups, exercise groups etc. I know it can be daunting and a bit scary but just go for it, you never know what can come from putting yourself out there and you will meet good people, have your boundaries and protect your privacy but just try it.
@janedoe09
@janedoe09 Жыл бұрын
@@annetaylor7496 💜💜💜
@janedoe09
@janedoe09 Жыл бұрын
@@soitreelle9968 💜💜💜
@wambuialice957
@wambuialice957 Жыл бұрын
Dr Ramani does not get enough recognition. She has literally healed me
@maevebutler4641
@maevebutler4641 Жыл бұрын
DrRamini is the greatest gift for all Narcissistic and antagonistic survivors Bless you DrChatterje for this interview She has greatly enhanced & healed my life! Thanks again
@jenamirgholi6004
@jenamirgholi6004 Жыл бұрын
she is competent too.
@caobranch
@caobranch Жыл бұрын
You have not listened to Dr. Jay Reid. Really.
@caobranch
@caobranch Жыл бұрын
​@@maevebutler4641 Anyone with serious lifelong damage due to childhood narcissistic abuse should be listening to Dr Jay Reid.
@iconsnart
@iconsnart Жыл бұрын
I have immense respect for Dr Ramani, as well. And so much gratitude! One of my few saviors
@corilewis
@corilewis Жыл бұрын
When my dishes pile up in the sink and I’m procrastinating doing them, I tell myself to “just clean one dish” and often I end up doing all the dishes since I’m already doing them. These tips work!
@suemitchel-runow3566
@suemitchel-runow3566 Жыл бұрын
Oh..I do some thing simular..I finally realized that even doing some was progess...I could do the glasses or dishes and go back later and do the pots and pans..otherwise I could get overwhelmed and not do any...as the pile keeps growing
@malunachow
@malunachow Жыл бұрын
Yes, it works for me to, because when we see something like to hard, we can feel not able to manage it, so if we choose to do something smaller, lighter - we can win 🙂
@djbond6241
@djbond6241 Жыл бұрын
Insecurity IS A ISSUE TOO
@djbond6241
@djbond6241 Жыл бұрын
IT'S NOT GOOD TO COMPARE SELF WITH OTHERS..
@djbond6241
@djbond6241 Жыл бұрын
SOCIAL MEDIA platforms LIKE (* FACEBOOK *) ARE OFTEN TOXIC PLACES WHERE THERE'S A LOT OF GOSSIP, & COMPARING, & DRAMA
@lynngreen9637
@lynngreen9637 Жыл бұрын
In my family we had the 10 minute rule. Each family member, including parents, had to spend (at least) 10 minutes a day on household chores. The kids could decide how they wanted to help (dishes or take out trash or clean their backpack or whatever) but were required to participate because everyone has 10 minutes in a day-even busy kids-and it took all of us to make things work well in our family.
@8all8at8once8
@8all8at8once8 11 ай бұрын
That’s actually a pretty good idea!
@JessClarkArt
@JessClarkArt 11 ай бұрын
I'm going to try to use this! Thanks!
@spiritual2020
@spiritual2020 7 ай бұрын
Cool
@Youtuber13111
@Youtuber13111 Жыл бұрын
the 7 Self-Sabotaging Habits: 1. Procrastination 4:37 2. Social Comparison 15:51 3. Surrounding Ourselves with Toxic People 36:42 4. Negative Voice/Thoughts Inside our Heads 56:45 5. Perfectionism 1:14:37 6+7. Overly Invested in a Specific Outcome + Pathologizing Your Own Needs 1:27:28
@logangill9052
@logangill9052 Жыл бұрын
Taking on too much
@salihashahid9526
@salihashahid9526 Жыл бұрын
Thank you
@trevnti
@trevnti Жыл бұрын
are there time stamps for these lol, my add keeps wondering off
@Youtuber13111
@Youtuber13111 Жыл бұрын
@@trevnti Just added some time stamps for you :)
@utrnagel9441
@utrnagel9441 Жыл бұрын
Who are you
@micheleele7299
@micheleele7299 Жыл бұрын
I wholeheartedly agree that we self sabotage when we are suffering & in pain whether it be anxiety, depression or an incident that is so bizarre that it leaves someone in their head for so long that their life unravels due to their elevated emotions & confusion😔…..It is so easy for people to say “let go of it” especially when they themselves have no clue what the person’s experience was like & the confusion & brain fog left by the incident literally changes the person’s brain to the point that focus is almost impossible……problem solving that came so easy to that person before bc their brain fired properly…is now a frustrating, highly emotional task leaving the person feeling even more worthless…& the cherry on the top is others putting all of the blame for self sabotaging on that person who already feels lower than low & the smallest of tasks feels like walking thru mud in the fog! (NO ONE WANTS TO FEEL THIS WAY!!!!) 💣
@sperez3275
@sperez3275 Жыл бұрын
Yep. Exactly I can’t get a damn assignment done for the life of me. I’ve been straight A student my entire ice. Currently, I have F’s in like all of my classes, 0’s o exams… I just can’t get myself to good things, study, turn things in before deadlines, focus, nothing. Doesn’t even feel like my brain. But it’s weird bc I don’t feel sad and depressed, kinda numb to the pain I felt extremely heavily starting in January.. So I’m not constantly crying but my brain bro…. It’s like I CANT fix it or do thing. It’s like I CANT. No matter how hard I try… I feel powerless. This isn’t me. I’m a little bit over a year away from my degree…. I’ve only ever made all A’s and 2 C’s ever in college. Now I don’t even know if I’m going to pass anything…
@aplik881
@aplik881 11 ай бұрын
Maybe we can follow the content of our thoughts and reframe one time to time turning it into a more positive language. Not all at once, notice then start imagining the contrary. Ask ourselves what do we desire, what makes us feel great. Then change that inner voice into a more friendly one ibstead of a stinging ine always. I am doing this since 3 to 5 years now and my flow, joy and brain function are ccomong back by waves. Not always good but better. And i keep going. So dont give up on yourselves, you are the main character who can work it out for you. Much love 💫
@kathyadair8552
@kathyadair8552 7 ай бұрын
@@sperez3275 Wow, have you been severely Traumatized in the last year? Maybe you need some EMDR, with a Trauma Therapist.
@loveheals6184
@loveheals6184 7 ай бұрын
​@@aplik881, I hope your wellness is ongoing. What you said in response to micheleele7299's very relatable post resonated with me. Would you please share an example so I can customize it for myself? Thanks in advance. 🥰🙋🏿‍♀️💃🏿
@chartydurrant744
@chartydurrant744 7 ай бұрын
very well said, its a very nasty modern 'trend' victim blaming leads to further deeper layers rather than holding and supporting someone. Gentleness time and self-compassion finally lead us out if the inner hell that toxic folk leave us with.
@stewiecountry
@stewiecountry Жыл бұрын
Wow....I could listen to Dr. Ramani all day! Her insight into human behavior and motivation is fabulous, and she explains it all so well.
@judithscott9134
@judithscott9134 Жыл бұрын
Yes! She hugs me when she speaks! Id love to meet her!
@Corrans
@Corrans 10 ай бұрын
Me too
@josephinebrevig8748
@josephinebrevig8748 7 ай бұрын
Me too. Her stuff on narcissism is such a game changer. She keeps it real.
@LMCEK
@LMCEK Жыл бұрын
I love Dr. Ramani. It's impossible for her to give a bad interview. Always helpful, insightful, relatable, personable 😀
@2411Stuart
@2411Stuart 9 ай бұрын
It's really simple in this life to be nice. We can't do it ALL BY OURSELVES! I really enjoy helping others. I am actually doing a on hand study with addicts and would love to share what I have observed about them and myself ❤🙏. Doing this is not as easy as it sounds. Going into a toxic environment, knowing that abuse will happen, 😢 because hurt people hurt people. Trying to give quality time for listening 😊. Some of them are hurting deeply and I am strengthening myself not to fall for toxic relationships. I'm not toxic and you should enjoy what you do and your reputation will speak for itself. I put my life on hold to help family and others 😕. And being shy with low self-esteem but not for education. I'm confident with learning and education. I am socially awkward because I didn't chase women like my friends in highschool 😂. Church stuck with me growing up. My mom told me not to go out there and ruin some women's life. 😢 I already felt bad and now I might not be good for a normal relationship! I believe she did because of her life experiences. It kept me from pretty much feeling unworthy, don't make enough, or my skin and being smart brings out racism in others 😮 I could talk a long time with what I have experienced and observed interacting with others. 😂 How about when your department sabotages you because they are intimidated by who you are as a person. 😕
@2411Stuart
@2411Stuart 9 ай бұрын
I deserve what makes me happy and safe in my life 😊. The toxic people in the toxic environment will not be easily change. The glass bottom effect takes over and then that behavior is celebrated and respected sometimes. 😕
@victoriahunt64
@victoriahunt64 Жыл бұрын
I literally prayed this Morning to The Most High God asking him to search my heart and find my Ill-wills,reveal them to me, and help me work through them. This video popped up on my KZbin mentions right after my daily morning prayer and all I could do was cry and thank the Most High God for this edification! 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
@chriswright91
@chriswright91 Жыл бұрын
God's cool 😎
@jeanie5074
@jeanie5074 11 ай бұрын
Reading the Book of Psalms, Proverbs, Sanskrit, are very valuable❤
@MrsSlocombesPuddyCat
@MrsSlocombesPuddyCat 10 ай бұрын
Mmmmm. And why did it pop into my feed when I needed it.....yet I don't believe in God.
@rachelanne2968
@rachelanne2968 7 ай бұрын
@@MrsSlocombesPuddyCat You may not believe in the Most High, but He doesn't need you believing in Him in order to exist, because His existence is not dependent on people acknowledging it : He's real even if no one believes He exists. Have you ever thought that this video popped into your feed when you needed it because He is trying to get your attention and to draw you closer to Himself ?
@KJ-lb4tj
@KJ-lb4tj 7 ай бұрын
Does the video draw people closer to God? I haven't watched it, bit it looks like a psychology video?
@1stand2ndtimearound67
@1stand2ndtimearound67 Жыл бұрын
Why I LOVE Dr. Ramani! she is real about herself, she is with the times, she gives real cause and effect insight. I have been following her for about a year and my mental and physical life has improve. Anxiety and avoidance were a breakthrough. I always learn some new and how to apply it to my life and how to deal with people around me. And yes, I did listen to the whole hour and 52 minutes. Thank you to you both.
@FrenchTwist
@FrenchTwist Жыл бұрын
A very wise woman once told me that no man will satisfy all of our emotional needs which is why God gives us FRIENDS
@KarenBasset
@KarenBasset Жыл бұрын
....and pets.
@sparklegirl7544
@sparklegirl7544 Жыл бұрын
Yes and even more than that, He gave us His Son...Yeshua...Jesus of Nazareth! Have a blessed and glorious day!!!
@sparklegirl7544
@sparklegirl7544 Жыл бұрын
@@KarenBasset Truly! Angels in fur...
@utrnagel9441
@utrnagel9441 Жыл бұрын
Romans 10 vers 9 and 10 say it out loud
@amg9163
@amg9163 Жыл бұрын
❤️
@GregMunro
@GregMunro 6 ай бұрын
Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her
@user-er9hv4pl2u
@user-er9hv4pl2u 6 ай бұрын
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let her go i did all i could to get her back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring her back
@GregMunro
@GregMunro 6 ай бұрын
Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?
@user-er9hv4pl2u
@user-er9hv4pl2u 6 ай бұрын
Her name is *Victoria Lee hess*, and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
@GregMunro
@GregMunro 6 ай бұрын
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive
@benjammin4840
@benjammin4840 Жыл бұрын
43:45 "I don't think it's cynical for a person to try to protect themselves" amen
@janai4477
@janai4477 Жыл бұрын
I was not aware about the toxic effects that comparing can have until I started my healing journey and I started psychotherapy. I learned that comparing is always unhealthy, it is a cognitive distortion. It is not easy to unlearn something that I practiced for so long time and being unaware. But I am hopeful and I feel empowered to know one of the root that is causing me a bad self image. 💗 Dr Ramani
@sharronmahfoudi6406
@sharronmahfoudi6406 Жыл бұрын
Yes I believe Denial is a serious form of procrastination....I have to constantly watch out for myself going into denial to avoid this procrastinate
@tamarunitamaruni4724
@tamarunitamaruni4724 Жыл бұрын
There's something so honest and ordinary about her own human experience that she's soo relatable when she speaks the wisdom.
@pialindeg
@pialindeg Жыл бұрын
Dr. Ramani you are pouring gold out of your mouth - thank you. I owe you a big, big cake for helping me through tough situations in recent years.
@veritas2222
@veritas2222 Жыл бұрын
God, I LOVE this conversation. On so many levels, for so many reasons, it is a healing extravaganza for me. Thank You! 💐💐💐💐💐💐💐
@eskedartam
@eskedartam Жыл бұрын
The amount of wisdom, knowledge, and awareness one can get from these conversations are profound and priceless! Thank you both 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
@gazingatmars
@gazingatmars 7 ай бұрын
I almost always agree with Dr. Ramani, but not all people find brushing their teeth easy. I remember struggling with self-care from a very young age and then being berated for it. I think there is a peice on procrastination that procrastination she is missing. As the child of a neglectful narcissist, I feel a compulsion to be the POS I felt my Mother believes I am. I know if I shine and succeed in life, there will be no reward. So no, not everyone finds bruching their teeth easy. I was recently diagnosed with ADHD and whether this was induved by nature or nurture, I struggle with habits immensely. I have to consciously choose everything I do. Very very little in my day-to-day is automatic, besides hitting the snooze button.
@marcher.arrant
@marcher.arrant Жыл бұрын
This may be the most illuminating podcast episode I've ever listened to in regards to the psychological issues that have been torturing me my whole life. I'm blown away. Everything she said made so much sense and just felt right. I feel so much hope that I can change things now that I understand the problem. I can't thank you both enough.
@mollydavisyoga
@mollydavisyoga Жыл бұрын
Wow! I am so grateful for Dr. Romani. She’s real. I’d love to have her as my therapist. I learned so much from both Dr’s. (Love Chattergee-who doesn’t?). Great podcast ❤
@denasharpe2393
@denasharpe2393 Жыл бұрын
So so true!! Easy to listen and learn without lots of judgment...makes me think l.might be able to move on with achieving my goals.....
@judithscott9134
@judithscott9134 Жыл бұрын
Hey! She "IS" your therapist! Mine too! I bet if I tracked her down she would grant me a hug where I could just cry for for 10 min! And its bc she GETS it!!!! Shes so very accessable!❤
@jeanie5074
@jeanie5074 11 ай бұрын
It’s Dr. Ramani👍
@khaledaparveenrupa3206
@khaledaparveenrupa3206 Жыл бұрын
31:50 . Thanks Dr. Ramani for that clarification. 10 years ago I stopped my career and started to do inner work, therapy. Now I am in different place. I am happy that I did that even though it was the hardest thing I have ever done.
@4Mikes4Mindset4
@4Mikes4Mindset4 4 ай бұрын
That resonated ❤
@Deanriley
@Deanriley Жыл бұрын
Really enjoy hearing Dr. Ramani;she’s brilliant on narcissism.
@theonewhoknows62
@theonewhoknows62 Жыл бұрын
Yes!
@notthatkindofdoctor4162
@notthatkindofdoctor4162 Жыл бұрын
Two of my favorite doctors I love learning from! Thank you for this conversation. ❤
@AbidingHopeMentalHealthCoach
@AbidingHopeMentalHealthCoach Жыл бұрын
From about 37:00 to about 1:00:00, she talks about how m self sabotage can be a function of a dysfunctional relationship. And oh my goodness, isn’t that the truth! So much of what she said in those 15 minutes relate perfectly to what I’m going through. Including the devaluation of myself by my partner. We found a marriage counselor who can see exactly what is going on, and long story short, I’m not the problem. But I’ve been told I was for so long. It’s such a relief to know I am not at fault! To recognize that many of my poor coping mechanisms developed as a way of coping with the lack of intimacy in my marriage. I had just been seeing that this week, and this podcast was like God was giving me confirmation of what I had already figured out. Like He was saying, “You’re on the right track.” That is so freeing and validating! Thank you!
@sparklegirl7544
@sparklegirl7544 Жыл бұрын
May God grant you greater favor and honor with your husband, in Jesus awesome Name! Amen!!
@ALT-vz3jn
@ALT-vz3jn Жыл бұрын
Sounds like you’re married to a narcissist. Dr. Ramani’s own KZbin channel has many videos that cover the subject of narcissistic abuse. I was once married to a narcissist, worst years of my life. Good luck and I hope things get better for you ❤
@AbidingHopeMentalHealthCoach
@AbidingHopeMentalHealthCoach Жыл бұрын
@@ALT-vz3jn I went down that road a few years ago. Read several books on covert narcissism and emotional abuse. The more I read, the less it sounded like him. I now understand exactly what is going on, and it’s not abuse. It’s just a difficult situation. And it is ending, looks like this summer.
@judithscott9134
@judithscott9134 Жыл бұрын
That voice was YOU...not god!!! It was your true self. ❤
@deborahcollins1100
@deborahcollins1100 Жыл бұрын
Thank you so very much for this video! I am in an extremely difficult narcissistic marriage for 38 yrs with my almost 71 yr old husband now and definitely insults me almost daily of course and one example I have lost 100 lbs in the last couple years and off my diabetes meds and blood pressure meds too but he never never has complimented me or supported me of course. In fact he tells me quite often that I am sickly looking and everyone thinks that I am sick and he will call me a scrawny old woman and that I don’t eat enough! He says he didn’t marry a scrawny damn woman ! Thank goodness I have a weight support group that I attend weekly and support with them on Facebook.
@utrnagel9441
@utrnagel9441 Жыл бұрын
Maybe you want to watch Chef AJ on youtube
@haley4302
@haley4302 Жыл бұрын
Good on you for putting yourself first and taking care of your body. It’s so hard to do when you’re being berated and nothing is ever good enough 🙏🏻I hope that you know that you come across as amazing, capable and strong.
@sayusayme7729
@sayusayme7729 11 ай бұрын
Keep on keeping on, you haven’t any ears for that BS. Shine on 🤩
@healthyintention
@healthyintention Жыл бұрын
ADHD and procrastination, is a whole other ball game.
@jennetteoverzet2959
@jennetteoverzet2959 Жыл бұрын
😂 I should think about that more ☺️
@wahbaki
@wahbaki Жыл бұрын
Dr. Chatterjee thank you so much for your podcasts. They have become my happy, healthy safe space. I have learnt so much from the content you and your guests share. 🙏🏽
@chazwyman8951
@chazwyman8951 Жыл бұрын
The biggest problem is the thing that drives all these things; procrastination, guilt, want, desire, obligation; things "needing to be done". Most of these things are based on peer pressure, social pressure , family pressure, societal pressure. None is self generated. it is all external. So self sabotage is an internal conflict based on exogenous factors. When you are true to yourself and not doing what others want of you, it is THEN that you get things done. But separating yourself from the pressures you have allowed to be placed upon you is not easy.
@abeach5420
@abeach5420 Жыл бұрын
*The one & only **#DrRamani* . . . that's all that needs to be said ('finally' on Dr. Rangan's channel}👏❣
@denasharpe2393
@denasharpe2393 Жыл бұрын
Yay!!!!
@natureisallpowerful
@natureisallpowerful Жыл бұрын
I'm definitely a self sabotageur, I sometimes do purposely so I'll struggle and become more resilient. Theres method in my madness
@utrnagel9441
@utrnagel9441 Жыл бұрын
Yap, this sounds somehow even kind! I had to smile🤗
@user-wz5ir9jl8q
@user-wz5ir9jl8q Жыл бұрын
I admire Dr.Ramani for being so articulate at 6.45 in the morning! 😄
@shaunkong62
@shaunkong62 Жыл бұрын
WHAT Dr Ramani said was tremendous!! 😳,
@SweetUniverse
@SweetUniverse Жыл бұрын
My mother was the one person in my life who made me feel bad & I couldn't get rid of her. She held onto me like a bulldog (she wanted me to be her servant/ take care of her). I did try to help her. She was always depending on others to make her happy. She wouldn't go to counseling or let go of me. She died of cancer at 75 & never changed. She actually got worse at the end.
@utrnagel9441
@utrnagel9441 Жыл бұрын
💞
@maevebutler4641
@maevebutler4641 Жыл бұрын
DrRamini's knowledge knows no bounds I so admire her humility , considering she has endless qualifications An extraordinary woman!
@8all8at8once8
@8all8at8once8 11 ай бұрын
Oh, it sounds like my mother 🤔 She’s 73 now…. Do you feel bad after her death?
@jeanie5074
@jeanie5074 11 ай бұрын
Sugar Spring, it’s so sad to hear what you say about your mother, that she made you bad about yourself. But, it’s really bad also to hear you say, “you could never get rid of her.” Well, now she’s not with you any more. So sad to hear about the pain she must have gone through. Hopefully, she’s in a much better place now. The same to you. No matter how badly our parents treated us, we need to forgive them, and forgive ourselves. If they’re toxic, we can maintain a healthy distance. First, we must heal ourselves, then, we can treat ourselves and others with love❤
@SweetUniverse
@SweetUniverse 9 ай бұрын
@@jeanie5074 actually, my therapist said that I don't have to forgive my mother unless I receive an apology, which I never did. Letting go of the past was something I definitely had to do & that didn't happen overnight. I also needed to stop blaming her & to move forward with living my best life. That's still in progress. 👍👍
@lesliedavis4366
@lesliedavis4366 Жыл бұрын
Oh I connected with that comment- the struggle to balance the immigrant parent’s expectations and finding my own past. Thank you DR Ramani. I’ve learned so much with your discussions the past 2 years.
@margareteversley7850
@margareteversley7850 Жыл бұрын
This is an awesome and educational session. Will transform my life. 10:45am my time in Barbados.
@sherryripepi6024
@sherryripepi6024 10 ай бұрын
I agree with you that Dr. Ramani is an amazing person. She is doing a great service by raising awareness about narcissism and helping people who are struggling with it. Her podcast is a valuable resource, and I am grateful for her work. I am also grateful for the information you have shared. It is important for people to know that they are not alone and that there is help available if they are dealing with a narcissistic person. I hope that your words will help others to heal and thrive. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
@anandalawrence6203
@anandalawrence6203 Жыл бұрын
Wow, I can't tell you how much I've learnt from this interview, amazing talk
@fyliao
@fyliao Жыл бұрын
Dr. Ramani turns the mental intangibles and confusions into mental clarity. There is absolutely no one so INSIGHTFUL and PRAGMATIC like Dr. Ramani. The talks are sometimes long but they are such necessary lessons for anyone who don't like their life right now. I can't thank Dr. Ramani enough.
@Butterflieslove2
@Butterflieslove2 7 ай бұрын
Absolutely agree with you. She is a real gem!
@catsteinhilb2880
@catsteinhilb2880 Жыл бұрын
Every topic she touched, was spoken with so much clarity and insight, it hit every thing I believed, and everything I needed to hear at the moment, and I am really grateful. Thank you.
@judithscott9134
@judithscott9134 Жыл бұрын
Your post did the very same for me! 😅
@samic
@samic Жыл бұрын
Really thank you for this podcast. As someone who is kinda at the crossroads at the moment this truly gave me invaluable insight and comfort!
@Fadedsista
@Fadedsista Жыл бұрын
Dr. Ramani you are the GOAT and you give so much to survivors, I hope you know how important you are, I share this often in my support group! 💛💛💛💛
@Anita-wh4vr
@Anita-wh4vr Жыл бұрын
Thanks very much. As always very informative. What often goes unmentioned, and which is also a reason for self-sabotage, is dissociation, especially in people who have experienced severe trauma at a very young age. IFS helps to a certain extent. But you have so many autopilot programs that self-sabotage is the order of the day. A topic that would also be interesting is about highly sensitive people.
@sherrifoster8992
@sherrifoster8992 Жыл бұрын
I am always led to your videos when I need it most!! Thank you both!
@irenepike3749
@irenepike3749 Жыл бұрын
I really enjoy all of your podcasts. They have made a very positive life change for me.
@sally954
@sally954 Жыл бұрын
I have just finished listening to this and I feel I have had a double dose of wisdom as I also discussed these topics with my therapist earlier today. So on point for me and really helpful, thank you 😊
@judithscott9134
@judithscott9134 Жыл бұрын
This one I watch regularly as I need to consume it by the spoonfuls.
@judithscott9134
@judithscott9134 Жыл бұрын
But...I have paused it bc I'm procrastinating delivering some items... Why? What is the un named fear... Oh. Bc Im afraid that the things my not be appreciated or good enough. I just want them accepted and understood. I know that they will...sooo off I go in a better state of mind and avoidance has been replaced with enthusiasm and anticipación.😊
@yolandagrabowski6043
@yolandagrabowski6043 Жыл бұрын
My uncle's girlfriend was telling me about incentives. His granddaughter's boyfriend told her she's stuck with him cause she's fat. She slimmed down, left him for a new boyfriend that she's happier to be with.
@jenni4claire
@jenni4claire Жыл бұрын
Fat people are free to leave too.
@elam3654
@elam3654 Жыл бұрын
Listening to this and reflecting on my 1.5 year MBA while working full time. omg, there was a period where I did a 72 hour stretch of no sleep and just didn't tell anyone. "How'd that work out?" Three B's, and one professor taking me aside and asking "Are you doing ok?" Of course I am. I just did something breathtakingly insane and pulled it off.
@grammamellow1219
@grammamellow1219 Жыл бұрын
Dr R. I look back to where I was. I am deffinatly much improved from where I started. I am not where I would like to be but my vision of the future is so much brighter then it was. One breath, one day, week, month at a time. Inch, step, you have been a life raft. Thank you.
@Nicole-lx1um
@Nicole-lx1um Жыл бұрын
Thanks, this is very helpful! I've been struggling with the new onset of procrastination, but I figured out why from this. I learned when I have to make a fire vs frying pan decision, I hate it, so I procrastinate. What Dr. Ramani says here is true about breaking down difficult tasks. Someone once told me a way to quit smoking was just to delay having that cigarette by 10 minutes. After this, he just said to extend this bit of time a bit further each time. I heard this back in 1994. I don't smoke anymore.
@annarubnikowicz9029
@annarubnikowicz9029 Жыл бұрын
Excellent interview of excellent doctors - Dr Chatterje, again, thank you for this conversation!
@zamarath7095
@zamarath7095 Жыл бұрын
She is hardcore on point. Real. And logical confident rather than authoritarian. Brilliant.
@marlenefeldmann6108
@marlenefeldmann6108 Жыл бұрын
Great podcast! Thank you! ❤️
@awesometulips9427
@awesometulips9427 Жыл бұрын
Dr. Ramani thanks for such detailed insights. It is through the nuances that self sabotage can be controlled and overcome. Love you 💗 you are an amazing talented professional ❤
@yvonnetaylor269
@yvonnetaylor269 Жыл бұрын
loved this podcast. Since i had narcasstic parents i promised myself i would be a better parent. Sadly i ended up over parenting it waa done with love and knowing no better.
@vogeljennifer6318
@vogeljennifer6318 Жыл бұрын
similar
@mrssomeone2143
@mrssomeone2143 6 ай бұрын
Syukron dr Ramani. I'm short of figuring out why i procrastinate. Where that thing called perfection came from and mess my life. I remember my professor said to me, you have to hand me your revision once more, if it doesn't perfect rightaway, i will leave you to other lecturer. I feel that event stamp sooo deep in me and mess my life upside down in sooo many years, 13 years dr....yes....
@thefunkybassist9916
@thefunkybassist9916 Жыл бұрын
Recently I've come across a scientific topic that said that procrastination is actually often driven emotionally: the feeling of being harshly judged causes the avoidance. Which is very pertinent for survivors of narcissistic abuse, who often have that harsh inner critic.
@moniquejackson7741
@moniquejackson7741 Жыл бұрын
Just when you start to think these videos couldn't get any better.
@swenett1308
@swenett1308 3 ай бұрын
This is so insightful. When you're ready for the change the teacher shows up.
@teresaglas7801
@teresaglas7801 Жыл бұрын
This conversation is so helpful - thank you!
@insiteandawareness3500
@insiteandawareness3500 7 ай бұрын
I've created a routine and sometimes things come up that take away from the routine but then I'll get back on track again. Routine returns and I'm good again. I love to do yoga, swimming and walking/hiking with my dog. I take it easy on myself each day with at least an hour of self-care. This is how I'm managing to deal with the stresses in life. Don't compare yourself to others at all but be the best self that you can be.
@pseudopuppy160
@pseudopuppy160 Жыл бұрын
I'm also someone who needs to sit somewhere specific. I'll arrive hours early, to ensure I've got the seat with my back to the wall, facing the door, with easy access to walking out that door. It's the joy of PTSD from a recent assault. I survived being raised in a home with 2 narc parents, and various assaults... but THIS assault has just done my nervous system in. Still working through it. So very glad to see someone with various successes in their world, who has adapted to similar ptsd symptoms. Makes me feel less "out of control", and more "I can adapt to this and still be successful". Thanks so much for talking about your experience. It means the world. :)
@jaytoussaint9598
@jaytoussaint9598 Жыл бұрын
I never thought very deeply about why I have to be on the outside. I do this at restaurants in the booths. I thought I was just selfish. I get to where I feel trapped. If I overthink the trapped feeling I’ll go down a rabbit hole too though. I had a teacher in the first grade. She taught music and she told me how her tongue was too big for her mouth. I think she was talking about her dental stuff in her mouth or something but it freaked me out. So it made my tongue feel trapped. I can feel trapped if people are in my face too long. It’ll make me feel like I can’t catch my breathe. My feet have to be out of the blanket or they will be trapped. Shoes make my toes feel trapped. Long sleeve shirts make my arms burn. I know they’re all different feelings of trapped but I also can feel trapped in open spaces, or the opposite where I feel an overwhelming feeling like I might float away I had a dream one time and it keeps coming up in my thoughts recently, where I was in an elevator that made me squish up to the ceiling when it went down and squashed me flat when it went up. and I fall and fly in my dreams. Okay. Sorry for the rant of random stuff.
@snehasawhney765
@snehasawhney765 Жыл бұрын
Absolutely loved this one. Thank you 🙏🏼 it’s very helpful. Exactly what I needed to hear right now
@ST-pp3fk
@ST-pp3fk Жыл бұрын
Fantastic podcast. Thank you so much to both of you.
@MonicaGunderson
@MonicaGunderson Жыл бұрын
I agree, being diagnosed with chronic illness / autoimmune disease and being immunocompromised (especially during covid pandemic) is life changing in sooooo many ways. I feel I have more of an understanding of life, learning radical acceptance, loving myself unconditionally, and unapologetically. Built Healthy boundaries with consequences. Working on a loving marriage. Cultivating healthy friendships. My life matters, and it's my responsibility to take care of myself, mentally and physically. I chose to be around healthy friendships and relationships.
@samayeetabanerjee9672
@samayeetabanerjee9672 11 ай бұрын
Can i just say once again how grateful I am that i get to listen to Dr. Ramani in spite of living in a different country.
@nicolaseinhorn4540
@nicolaseinhorn4540 Жыл бұрын
What a good idea to have a facebook acount about a dirty fridge, and full bascket of clothes... i absolutly love it ! I'm going to think about it. Thanks
@Venusbabe66
@Venusbabe66 Жыл бұрын
Two of my favourite channels!!! ❤️👏 Fantastic conversation!!! Great choice. Another conversation about narcissism and power would be fantastic!
@joywimer4281
@joywimer4281 Жыл бұрын
I am frozen right now, so afraid 😳 to do anything after so much trauma 😪
@virginiareyna-walling8695
@virginiareyna-walling8695 10 ай бұрын
Dr. Ramani , has helped me so much , she absolutely changed my way of dealing with my anxiety from the narsasstic relationship i wad in , still struggling but working on it everyday,i listen to her posts every day thats how i am getting through it
@reginabernice1121
@reginabernice1121 Жыл бұрын
"How will I proceed in this relationship if I know this person isn't going to change?" This hit home, I had to take a break from the video for 2 hours? I am going through a challenging time in my relationship and I am hoping someone changes, I have waited for 2 years to be treated with compassion and respect.
@tosca9561
@tosca9561 Жыл бұрын
Leopards do not change their spots. Narc parents and 2 narc husbands, now 70 and living alone with my companion creatures. It is pure heaven! There are worse things than being alone. Dr Ramani has truly saved me with her kindness, compassion and insight. Peace and blessings to her and all of us who are on this journey. May you find joy and comfort in this life. 🦋
@jillmarieweingarten3048
@jillmarieweingarten3048 Жыл бұрын
I became a Certified Peer Support Specialist one week ago. I appreciate everything being stated here. My wish is that all clinicians approach mental health in this manner. Thank you.
@cardinalsandrosestarot4724
@cardinalsandrosestarot4724 Жыл бұрын
Dr, Romani I wish too thank you for all that I have learned from you about how to protect me while in the slow process of leaving my narc!
@andrewhancock2451
@andrewhancock2451 Ай бұрын
No holds barred, humble, and hence, realistic.
@gloriajohnson3626
@gloriajohnson3626 Жыл бұрын
One of the best interviews ever. Great questions. Thanks for such wonderful content. Please continue your fantastic work.
@judithscott9134
@judithscott9134 Жыл бұрын
It really is a hot and very reusable discussion! I think it deserves an award! For always delivering! (I've watched it 6 times so far)
@ilah5970
@ilah5970 Жыл бұрын
Dr. Ramani is my savior 🙌🏼❤️
@hughmarkestill6941
@hughmarkestill6941 Жыл бұрын
Me too!
@johnwilks1563
@johnwilks1563 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for having Dr. Ramani on your show!
@robertomarquez1512
@robertomarquez1512 18 күн бұрын
Thank you for sharing. When I graduated with my Bachelors, I almost walked out of the commencement. I was is the middle and felt like I had to get out completely. I settled to sit in the isle and used the " I have to stand because my backhurts" excuse. This whole exchange has given me more insight on how to manage myself more effectively.
@lisabarrow5
@lisabarrow5 Жыл бұрын
My self sab is a glass ceiling i put on myself bc of narc parents saying subconsciously that i cannot exceed them and always need them
@finnsya8054
@finnsya8054 Жыл бұрын
This is an amazing conversation! The procrastination and the negative voice information helped me the most although I've struggled with all of these issues.
@sunnyadams5842
@sunnyadams5842 Жыл бұрын
Feeling too Trauma Sick to function is what stands in my way.
@GoldenAgeMuse
@GoldenAgeMuse Жыл бұрын
I changed my thoughts with my inner dialogue, diversion, power song and the all Powerful branding… “silly girl tricks are for kids”. And then replace the words of the inner critic by addressing it, “You shut up, you go home, you’re repetitive ,I understand and I’ll take it into consideration”.
@jasmine65
@jasmine65 Жыл бұрын
Parents really can sabotage their children's life by expecting a better life through them.
@lisamcdonald2877
@lisamcdonald2877 Жыл бұрын
So true and society tells us the opposite. If you value your relationship, think long and hard before having children. You will lose much of the happiness you feel with your partner, and possibly second guess your life decisions. It is a soul-crushing experience.
@RonWesterbeek
@RonWesterbeek Жыл бұрын
Enjoyed your uplifting podcast man, rewarding questions you had. Thanks for the lady's answers. 🌿🕊
@xanderpromeo
@xanderpromeo Жыл бұрын
I love this woman, everything out of her mouth is a gem. She gives great bang for the Buck!
@norapetty3355
@norapetty3355 Жыл бұрын
Too my hummingbird as when I lost my words, It is praises from my soul that belong to Our Father know the differences of communications Trust 1 A that One God of light! Thank you for all your endless hard work, efforts, for healing, treating, teaching, sharing lessons of life’s mindsets an mental healthcare organization to the world! Thank You & Appreciation! Peace be with you & yours!
@iXpress
@iXpress 7 ай бұрын
Its so soothing to hear Dr Ramani, she is assuring and has her heart in her work.
@VaticanRainbowLunaSea
@VaticanRainbowLunaSea Жыл бұрын
AND....again! Dr. Ramani nails it!!! thank you love your channel!! going to re-watch this one again, right away! thank you thank you thank you!
@nicolaseinhorn4540
@nicolaseinhorn4540 Жыл бұрын
The talk about the inner voice reminds me about the theory of the inner child and the inner adult. So important to create a dialogue within ourselves. It is a superb work. I really like this discussion. Have a good one.
@nicoleboie5297
@nicoleboie5297 Жыл бұрын
You are about helping! Benefited from your material for years. ❤️ u Doc
@nilgiridreaming
@nilgiridreaming 8 ай бұрын
I hav had so much healing from you, doctor Ramani, thank you. But thru a so well meaning friend I developed social anxiety - it was because I lost money & wound up poor. My friend made observations so I started to be very nervous about my overall appearance & my car. It was awful & I have had to accept being less than in some peoples’ eyes. The ‘not doing enough’ comments were also present - so i hear even you had this said to you!! Now I will use your guided image approach. I should after all appreciate that I am a person who has come thru narcissistic abuse including gas lighting without going completely nuts!!! I survive.. 🙏
@kukalakana
@kukalakana Жыл бұрын
Thought I might stop procrastination... ...tomorrow.
@shaunkong62
@shaunkong62 Жыл бұрын
Yes! DR. RAMANI'S insight on social comparison, fear avoidance is truly so helpful and valuable. Thank you so much for this interview Dr Chatterjee..This understanding could have help a suicide of a Hong Kong immigrant to the UK recently..Well, could have but unfortunately she died..
@denasharpe2393
@denasharpe2393 Жыл бұрын
So very sad.....let us listen and learn so that the lost person's life crisis will not have been in vain.....
@gwynethjones7323
@gwynethjones7323 6 ай бұрын
Be yourself. Take small steps to heal yourself. Ask yourself questions: What matters to me? What do you stand for? Am I doing what I want to do! Be careful what you wish for you might get it! ❤Dr. Romani! I’m a big fan! You do you Dr. Ramoni😊🎉. Powerful work to drill down into who you are, what you’re about!
@orianam9835
@orianam9835 Жыл бұрын
One of best films with dr. RAMANI. Less of narcicism topic and more on other important stuff. Watching again 😍
@rainbowgirljules
@rainbowgirljules 10 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for this podcast, Dr Ramani and Dr Chatterjee. After leaving an unhealthy 4-year relationship recently, I found myself checking my ex's Facebook account, where he'd been 'liking' attractive women's profile pic's. These women live near him and so, as well as going through the natural grieving process, I was self-sabotaging by comparing myself with them. I've just blocked him off everything since watching this. Thank you. xx
@Butterflieslove2
@Butterflieslove2 7 ай бұрын
Block them, it is the only way with these people. It takes time to detach, by it comes eventually. But it is important to do so physically and emotionally! It is possible. I did it after 2 years now, but it is worth wait. I can see things as they are real and clearly, so that doesnt affect me anymore, but it bothers me that it ever did!
@punyashloka4946
@punyashloka4946 11 ай бұрын
Dr ramani is amazing 👏 her understanding of Narcissism is amazing.
@andrearovenski
@andrearovenski Жыл бұрын
her last bit about the dsm! Awesome moment, and great whole interview.
@sherryripepi6024
@sherryripepi6024 10 ай бұрын
I agree with you that Dr. Ramani is an amazing person. She is a gifted storyteller and educator, and her work has the potential to change the world. I have been following Dr. Ramani's work for several years, and I have found her to be incredibly insightful and helpful. Her videos and podcasts have helped me to understand myself and my relationships better, and they have given me the tools I need to heal from the trauma of narcissistic abuse. I am grateful for Dr. Ramani's work, and I believe that she is a true pioneer in the field of narcissistic abuse. She is helping to break the silence around this issue, and she is giving a voice to those who have been silenced. I am confident that her work will continue to change lives for the better, and I am proud to call her a mentor and advisor. I believe that Dr. Ramani's work is especially important during the pandemic. The pandemic has been a time of great stress and uncertainty for many people, and it has exacerbated the challenges of narcissistic abuse. Dr. Ramani's work can help people to understand what they are going through, and it can provide them with the tools they need to heal. I am grateful for Dr. Ramani's work, and I believe that she is a true asset to the world. I am confident that her work will continue to make a positive impact on the lives of many people.
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