The Dark Empath | 5 Traits

[@piathomas1980]

The dark Empath has evolved through abuse . Nietzche said something like be careful fighting monsters that you do not become a monster yourself.

[@fribersson]

Excellent take. I’ve noticed the fake empathy, empathy towards concepts but none for real people. And the contempt: oh my… “I’m an empath and better than you!” 🤦🏻‍♂️ Yes, the simmering violence. Either words or constant “ticking time bomb”. Great video 👍🏼

[@Holypikemanz]

you love the dumb bumper sticker sayings like "ticking time bomb"

[@Shugg-Goff-HHoffical]

Oh yeah. It's the sanctimoniousness of it which creeps me out a little.

[@merisonola]

I was married to one and it was a nightmare. After we separated, my 12 year old daughter ran away from home from her abuse. She now lives with me full time.

[@s.hicks7213]

Nurses are some of the darkest empaths on the planet. At least that was my experience before I quit the profession. I was frequently in a state of compassion fatigue for over a decade working as a long term care nurse-probably bc I lacked boundaries, and didn’t have the ability to detach like the other nurses I worked with. Granted, I became one to try to get my mom’s approval and validation-all for the wrong reasons of course. lol. Nurses, however, are not always but quite frequently can be…strange-a weird concoction of all the wrong stuff.

[@pickle9753]

This new perspective helps me see my ex and his family in a little different lights, and has brought a few things to my attention..about them, and myself as well. 🤔🤔🤔 Thank you for time and thoughts Richard. ❤👏

[@stregadisalem732]

I think this is me except the physical violence. Lots of shame, more ego than we let on, displaced resentment, we overthink everything, passive aggressive, emotionally numb. It’s hard to find a balanced way to place boundaries or be assertive. We do share some traits with covert narcissist but I don’t think we manipulate the way narcissists do.

[@darkmind_defence]

Manipulation is just a tool, not a narcissistic trait. You can definitely be on the Cluster-B spectrum although you don't use manipulation as a tool. I hope you will check what is really going on with you. The underlying cause of your struggles can be many things, from undiagnosed ADHD or autism, to some form of personality disorder or trauma related issues. Wish you the best.

[@AutumnRain1111]

A Dark empath is narcissistic and they have psychopathy traits . If you don’t have that then you’re not one . Dark empaths are from the dark triad but not the same as the traditional dark triad .

[@wrrryyyyy]

Yes, the anger and vengeance part is spot on

[@tomcanham9218]

I am so fascinated with this because I am a dark empath; not only this, but I recognize now that I AM this way because (of course) of my mother. My mother was much more covert in her dark empath traits; she "presented" better, if that makes sense. Mine are almost entirely in my head; they are "in potentia." But I do know this: I do not want to be like that evil person, so while learning about this term "dark empath" fills me with dismay, because I am *finally* (trust me, I've been torturing myself with "what manner of fucked up thing am I?" for DECADES, now) seeing what I am, and... I don't like it at all... I also feel a sense of relief for having a term for it. It's alarming to me, also, that it seems like the psychotherapy industry treats "dark empaths" as a kind of bogeyman. From what I can see, narcissism, psychopathy, sociopathy -- these are all just normal human variation, right? Some people are more self-centered than others, but that, by itself is not unusual. And similarly, some people are able to "disconnect" from feeling the suffering from others... but, that's not unusual, either. Anyone with more than a superficial knowledge of psychopathy knows that there's a big difference between being able to take a beat between seeing someone else suffering, and feeling that suffering (psychopathy). Similarly, anyone with more than a superficial knowledge of sociopathy knows that EVERYONE feels schadenfreude from time to time, but that's a far cry from pulling the legs off insects, or sadistic rape/torture/murders. Meaning, that -- if you twist all of us enough, we can "go dark." The Milgram Experiment showed that. And empathy is the same... sometimes we call it "emotional intelligence" but it's the same thing; some people are just better at it than others. Empathy is just sociopathy's dark twin -- it feels the pain of others and wants to make it stop; sociopathy is feeling the pain and *liking it*. Again, all spectrums, all normal human variation! So why would it scare anyone, let alone trained professionals, that there are people who are "exceptional" in all of these spectrums? When I had an IQ of 173 measured, and I learned what that meant (including the history of racism and sexism in the Stanford-Binet scale that IQ was on), I rapidly came to the conclusion that it just meant... "more." More of all the same stuff that makes us human: great compassion and empathy, but also the capacity for immense cruelty -- hurting others simply because it *felt good*. Similarly, it seems like anything I put my hand to -- especially things that take *rational thought* -- I just seem to effortlessly master. Whereas things that take more... soft skills? Like patience and discipline -- you know, like proving any of this on paper ;) -- those I suck donkey dong at, because, I think, I was never basically forced to develop these abilities. I could coast by on being "smart." But if my family has a STRONG shared trauma history of narcissim, psychopathy, sociopathy, but also deep, "high IQ-based empathy"... I don't know how else to describe my folks! And my entire life has felt like a struggle to keep those traits in me from "going dark" and really starting to hurt people. But still, simply normal human variation. High IQ simply means "more" -- so apparently, that means... "dark empath," now? In a bygone age, we used to just use words like "evil," but it seems we've lost that courage. I mean, that word is wrong, too; I am simply "more." But -- "evil" feels easier to memorize than "dark empath."

[@skepchica]

Cognitive empathy. We understand it but we're not relating it to emotions we have or going another step further and feeling it with them. My theory is our trauma taught us the ability to dissociate from our emotions, unlike the narcissist who stopped developing emotionally as a toddler and doesn't have nor can understand anything above basic emotions.

[@jadegreen1554]

A person like this - their vengeance doesn’t come in a demonstrative way but they would do things like cheat on you and feel justified in doing it and wanting to hurt you in that “covert” way that you will never know, and carrying on lying in a way they know they have an up on you and getting vengeance on you, and you will NEVER know. Their ultimate vengeance to you for injustices they perceive, and it is brutal. Maybe with a normal narcissist you might hear a reason why that gets blurred out in a rage, with these covert narcissists it a mind boggling poisoning you WILL NEVER KNOW OR UNDERSTAND. Betrayal trauma from that is BRUTAL. Leaves one UTTERLY confused. Will never know what really happened or why.

[@gorunsko31]

Shockingly accurate. Profoundly grateful I am, Richard. I need to schedule major surgery and I need to have it done when my covert, fragile narcissist a.k.a husband is out of town. I don’t feel safe while injured, in need of assistance because his cold rage is a serious threat … simmering rage barely contained of a little boy who was exploited by his mother, a narcissist who used to take him to bed when her spouse was out of town. The little boy slept with his mommy to comfort her. She never own a night gown in her life and was proud of it. And her son never had a childhood he deserved. He will not go to therapy. I am will no longer be trying to save him. I know I need to run, but I got to repair my knee joint first. God help all who have been in relationship functioning as a punching pillow to their spouses. Seemingly calm but actually enraged… they loose control over their passive aggressive impulses when they perceive you as someone who does not deliver the care the feel entitled to. I fell badly 6 weeks ago and knew I broke my spine, asked him to take me to ER. Nope. Ambulance. No. If I stay I will die. Thanks Richard❤

[@k.c.sunshine1934]

@Er3n P0zv0lz7c please hang in there and put your trust in a higher power! I will pray for you. Please have a Blessed Day!

[@melissahutton2586]

I just finally left my abusive husband after 8 years. I couldn’t decide if he was a narcissist or not because I knew he had empathy but realized it is very limited. I have seen him show empathy so I took him back for a few months. His abuse got so bad I decided it didn’t matter if he had it or not. I know that he will not take care of my needs. I had a total knee replacement a few years ago. The care you will need afterward will require to have someone there to CARE for you and NOT threaten you! I couldn’t tell you how many times I hobbled on my walker to the car and drove before I was released just to get away from him. It is a very devastatingly vulnerable existence when your reality is fear and pain. It is better to be alone. GET OUT NOW!! Surgery or not they will abuse you and not care if you are suffering and suffer you will do!

[@gorunsko31]

@@k.c.sunshine1934 thank you. This means so much to me, because I am hurting🙏🫶

[@gorunsko31]

@@melissahutton2586 thank you for the dose of reality. You are so right it does not matter what he “ is or not.” What matters is he cannot resist the impulse to hurt me.

[@christinebeames712]

Omg , I wish I could help you , knee ops slow you down and are painfull , make sure you come out of hospital with some pain killers foe a few days till you can get some from your docs , my friend ran out due to her own doctors reluctance to prescribe them , what a monster he is , he may be damaged goods but it’s not your job to fix him , I do hope you have a friend or neighbour to help you , best wishes xxx

[@KimEvazians]

This sounds like my person. Extreme off-the-scale narcissism. Grandiose delusions. He SAYS he's "an empath" and SAYS he "literally has no ego."

[@targoltran]

I love Richards's British accent. I also like his broad vocabulary. Richard also comes across as a very down to earth person, which is a characteristic that I like most about him.

[@templeguide556]

The key word is * comes across. Don’t judge before you know someone personally.

[@francescavitaliani2337]

Thanks to your precise explanation, Richard, I'm now able to figure out the entity of my former partner. This was the reason why it's so difficult to overcome the trauma .

[@rosettesionne9139]

I was about to ask if dark empath were actually borderline and this video answered my question. Borderline have empathy but their emotional disregulation push them to act out in any sign of threats and makes people walk on eggshells around them.

[@taniahuete3016]

I feel like I went through all of this exactly. He was truly a miserable, unhappy, as$ole. Only cared about what people thought of him in public.

[@chat_GBriella]

I really believe that it’s a spectrum. And Everyone has these good & bad traits that fluctuate during different times. I’ve even noticed these traits come out in me when I dealt with a narcissistic relationship recently … some kind of covert narcissistic reactive abuse .. it was very strange. I recognized this toxicity and knew to leave the relationship.

[@shoenshoe2259]

Isn’t hypervigilance as a wired “safety” alarm from trauma really what an empath is? For example: being hyper aware of tone, body language and words that your brain trained you for to be aware of to avoid danger. That’s if you we’re traumatised as a youth. I am annoying aware of others emotions, I suppose as a trigger warning, but I don’t feel that I really know what their emotions are. That I’m almost tricked into thinking I’m an “empath” (I think it’s a bullshit term). It actually clouds judgment.

[@NothingCompares2U]

Yes, that sounds exactly like the covert narcissism disorder I am trying to help here. The terrible car ride home can represent frustration at whatever social event we had used to attend.

[@NothingCompares2U]

And also too, I really do not think as highly of anyone at the event, I feel like the covert narcissist may just be wasting their time.

[@its-maam-duh1902]

See I really think I kinda fit into this “dark empath” category, but I’ve seen people say it’s more so sociopathy. I myself have actually been called a sociopath multiple times lol, but tbh it might be similar but different with each person who’s a “dark empath”. I think some could display very clear covert narcissist tendencies, while others (like myself) don’t. I relate so much to this besides the hypersensitive to criticism, extreme emotional rage outbursts, and being very critical of myself. Some times I have talked bad about myself to gage peoples reactions and to pull sympathy, but I’ve never actually felt that way about myself. I’ve also definitely fished for compliments before and then been confused on why someone didn’t compliment me the way I imagined them to; but i disregard it as something being wrong with them instead of internalizing it. But overall I’ve seen some people even disregard the existence of dark empath and just call us high functioning sociopaths; but then again, all sociopaths are narcissist.

[@theclanguagedeveloper5309]

Those people are freaking terrifying, because one moment, they would seems like your best friend, and next moment, they are out for blood and would attempt to do a full scale character assassination on you. You have absolutely no idea why this person do it.

[@svvgrao]

I always thought a dark empath was someone like Maleficent (live action) A true empath, that trully loves, but is vindictive towards bad people, but have remorse and everything . I totally relate to her, beeing vindictive to the narc king. Because i didn't get quiet about it, I exposed what he did to me when I understood he was conscious about everything. THat he was proud to be "smarter".

[@MarieWilliams-t9w]

Dark empath usually have personality traits of bpd . They enjoy criticising people and get confused people with somebody who hurt them in the past.

[@ursaamajorr]

I genuinely don't crave attention. I can map myself just fine. Not detached, just selective with where I invest emotional energy. I don't exploit but can be cruel if I'm pushed to that point. I'm not a narcissist and don't feel entitled and don't feel superior to anyone lol. We're just able to disarm narcissists' because we're perceptive.

[@SpecialAgent666]

I have a near completely different perception of a Dark Empath that's better than what these psyche communities are saying. What the community is describing is more a Narcissist, Sociopath, or Psychopath, or some cocktail mix. I see them more as a good guy gone bad but still redeemable. In other cases, the dark empath is still a good guy but does unorthodox or shady 🤔 things for a purpose if not for personal gain. So depending on what tv show you watch. You can think of a character like that.

[@kollow]

I assume if someone goes around boasting to everyone, they're an empath, then it's a pretty good sign they're dark.

[@gloriacoleman7012]

I do find when in large organized groups there are narcissists and people who are flying monkeys for them or just brush off bad behavior it's just them we all have faults.

[@liabeachy]

It’s tough as some people like Anita morjanis whole life for the last 16 years has been about how she literally died for a short time from end stage cancer but came back and within 3 weeks completely healed no tumours no cancer and she’s an empath . One of her books is called sensitive is new strong . I agree it’s used too much but there’s no doubt that there are such folk . It’s trying ti understand our own feelings and emotions that’s hard . I need sanity and I need grounded material.

[@MrIgnitos]

I'm probably somewhere between 50 to 70% Dark Empathic. There's a few things this guy mentions that I'm definitely not. The Empath side of me, is proof that I can have a heart for people when I really want to, I just choose not to at least half of the time. Honestly I don't know why some think it's worse than being a psycho or sociopath. At least I have a heart. That should count for something. We live in a crazy corrupt clown world, & many times we have to do the "darker" things (like caring less) to survive.

[@neraida77]

Wow beautiful thumbnail👍👌🙋‍♀️

[@charlienelson2002]

Goodness...Another creature for the charm farm!

[@ericnorthman9410]

This was my neighbor. She called herself an empath But she was extremely manipulative and underhanded to others for no reason at all.

[@Bogdan-uu5oe]

That is 100% a narcissist.

[@DrMoorehen]

i agree 100%. My ageing parent is a covert N and fits the bill 100% for DE. The minute you started explaining the latter......i recognised them totally.

[@Maggie-we3er]

I would also add that covert narcissists will ascribe traits and hate towards certain groups of people. For example my ex would see a female dressed in a preppy manner and assume they were stuck up and bitchy. Men dressed this way were all dumb,not "real men", and relied on their parents to fix their problems. Even if I knew the person and could prove he was wrong, my ex would justify his perception by saying they were an anomaly or would look for any fault to prove his point. He had a laundry list of character traits he would assign to groups of people and why they were sub par humans. He is in his mid 40s and this seems to get worse as he aged. He even categorized all millennials as useless babies. Even though his closest friend is a millennial.

[@templeguide556]

They also have all these weird stereotypical ideas that they project onto you. Especially if the covert is male and your female. It’s like when they are talking to you they are talking through you. They don’t see anyone but themselves it’s messed up.

[@jadegreen1554]

My god this makes things so clear.

[@bennylindqvist3433]

always felt some ppl acted quite nice, understanding but you always felt like an inner sadism and off with some of these ppl, that you cant really trust them even if looks "cute", and by time they showing of their true abusive passive personality and plays around you and mock you and with a smile and say they "joking" and manipulative and tries put it all on you. Looks like big, good centerish persons with good personality but are not that in reality and will revenge on you and destroy all for you if they feel for it but small persons inside and alone...

[@jellybeanjedi2372]

Every human is prone to anger and emotional outbursts. Everyone. And we can all at times get offended more easily than others when some emotional deregulation takes hold which again is just normal human behaviour unless it’s unbounded and a lot of the time. This dark empath is not a diagnosis Richard you know that it’s click bait and your have so so much knowledge you kindly share ( does that remark enrage you or make you passively snigger ) . Anger. Come on mate keep the serious work you do posting please it’s beneficial for many and this is a bit below your pay grade really.

[@templeguide556]

Yep but it’s deliberate to piss people off cause he gets supply from upsetting people. He knows angry people empaths will come and comment that’s why he does it.

[@Tomara632]

So basically cowards who take their anger out on their partner, children and pets.

[@allowedtotalk8910]

It is all in their heads. Ha ha. I just want to have fun and just keep dancing every day.

[@philipjohn3262]

Thanks Richard 👍🏻

[@mayberry8620]

I miss learning about avatars and how to combat my internal critic. They use rage to start malignant complaints and lying about you.

[@alloftheabove4106]

I have all these buti am extremely sensitive I get hurt so easily. I'm not usually angry but specific ppl trigger me ... I know I don't like being around people but only the ppl I love. I'm non-judgmental. But yes I can ruin your life if I wanted and it is never in violence or by choice its only if you continuously do me wrong. I am very kind and genuine and loyal to children and beings of innocence . I cannot stand people who live in the material sinful gross way of life so in a sense I am judgmental. But mostly I just live in my head to escape .it's a battle within itself Ahhhgggg and I feel everyone's feelings. I want to be loved but only by the one I want and who has true intent. Otherwise it will drive me insane cuz I can feel your intentions. Idk

[@SleepyHollowKnight]

I’m fairly sure I’m a dark empath but I’m the exact opposite of a covert narcissist

[@Wennsdennseinmuss]

You just described my sister-in-law.

[@moniqueteal7153]

Commenters: Let's not confuse an Empath with a Dark Empath ... 2 very different empaths ! With that said ... Hi Richard, Well said ...on this topic ... love the content. Thank you

[@moniqueteal7153]

@Spicy Sky Raisin It seems you have been very unfortunate in the people you have met in life. I hope you get the opportunity to meet and befriend a beautiful empathic person at least once. Perhaps expand & improve your circle of friends, etc... 💝

[@infinitepeace3223]

Great video

[@RandomJL]

@wrongchannel111 😁❣️ Thank you been waiting for the last twist! Ive been delusional. we all have demons and they do hoover. Wouldn’t say you were possessed. 🙏Health..Hope life improves.

[@eeh91]

This is my mom. 💯

[@scorpiolove674]

I have no fear of overts, but the covert are terrifying because of their deep dark hatred of humanity and joy at seeing innocent people/ animals /kids get hurt.

[@templeguide556]

I know my mums one she’s a sadist

[@myportal8512]

It's like dealing with a gun that isn't loaded. You won't get shot, but you'll still get pistol-whipped.

[@courtneysigler5984]

I don’t say I agree with dark empaths being narcissistic? I think dark empaths were once light empaths and kept being used and abused by others because they lacked boundaries and gave their love so freely. They just simply couldn’t take anymore heartache. No one else seems to care so why am I being so understanding of others and caring when no one does it in return?

[@MN_MAGA]

You just described my ex.

[@stephenlamley541]

I'm starting tk wonder if I'm a empath. I get so emotional watching or being with people who are suffering it's actually painful for me, in my soul I say top of my stomach below my heart and ironically that's where some ancient folk believed the soul lives. I don't know. After some thought, I think I was a dark empath and I'm coming into the light. Nearly all of the dark signs i had when younger. I can manipulate, manipulation should I choose not a proud thing just saying.

[@bwolf3489]

The path of the Dark Jedi

[@kimberlymccracken747]

Dear Lord, deliver me from evil 🙏✝️❤️

[@k.c.sunshine1934]

Amen, Amen, Amen. May God Bless you!

[@templeguide556]

Amen babe. ❤

[@jak3753]

This is describing a narcissist... Not a dark empath. A Dark Empath is an empath that has suffered endured and survived the abuse of a narcissist and has become aware of their traits and learned how to use them to fight them back... The essentially have learned how to mirror the narcissist to defeat the narcissist.... A Dark Empath is akin to a black widow... The most docile of spiders that most often will only bite when it's being crushed.

[@AnahySanchez-Diaz]

It's narcissism once they feel in their right to act disrespectfully. Which is to say if they say I'm a Dark Empath but then say something of "I was in my right or the right" to excuse behavior is what changes it. An empath dissacotiates due to being empathic.

[@kitsunka2]

exactly, now imagine 99% of people are narcissists imagine CIS people blaming trans people or black people saying lies to control them. Dark empaths are survialists with far higher EQ and empathy then empath pro therapist.

[@RaffertyMBTI]

Is this type of personality more common in women than men? I have heard that women hit 10x more often than men in relationships.

[@stevenjohns-savage7024]

Thanks 👍😊

[@marilynminer677]

Yes. Thank you

[@jallehdoty4071]

Ah yes, dark empath. Comparison could be the cheshire cat if someone needs a visual aide.

[@northstarearthstar]

Ty.

[@sototallyover2359]

That's probably a borderline, in my opinion.

[@CharlotteCrummMarketing]

Bingo. Hi Dad! Just kidding. Like he'd ever be here.

[@danielapolo7346]

why selfcriticism? 1:39

[@Joel_J779]

Lol that’s def me

[@piksibelle]

Sociopath , dark empath sounds like sociopathy ? Isn’t cognitive empathy an oxymoron ?

[@mayberry8620]

Again, I miss you. Please stop learning from Sam vaknin. He is his own God and you have your own gifts, that are not his. I miss your philosophy and laughing at yourself. 😢I’m watching your you tube videos from two years ago. It was all about self healing. I’ve heard ENOUGH about unhealthy behavior. I’m trying to undo my childhood with a sociopath mother and a malignant covert narcissistic father. I’m supposed to get into domestic violence therapy and can’t as my Mom used my inheritance to get involved in the court system for abused children. Both used me for my body, blamed me for the incest.

[@m.o.s.h.1836]

dark emphats = narcissists, the same personality.

[@SilentFigure1]

Do U feel like your really grasping this Sir Richard is click bait Do better bro. I honestly feel like U are gaslighting.

[@templeguide556]

He is

[@alextrainor2552]

Sounds like me

[@jaimemartin6704]

Cruelty in spades.

[@Jackmcars12]

I think my ex malignant narcissist may be cyberstalking me. He lived with a hidden fiancé, & was my Artist Manager. I’m a singer/songwriter.

[@baronhelmut2701]

Its wrong. Its wrong its wrong. A dark empath is not an *abusive* personality. I cannot stress this enough. They are a niche product of an injust society. Dark empaths have learned soon in their lives that psychopaths, narcissists and machiavellians have a natural advantage over non-dark triad members. They consider this a great problem, which they aim to fix. A dark empath is emotionally detached from you if he has determined somebody to be *abusive* in nature. They care very much about people they have determined to be of good intentions. But as soon as they find another dark triad member, they unleash everything they mimic from other dark triad members of their past. They are literally the cops of the dark triad. By bumping all 3 dark personality traits to the brim they gain the upper hand over the bad members of the dark triad.

[@ursaamajorr]

Exactly. This video is completely off.

[@plethoradulcet]

Omg that's me

[@SpxcyMxyo]

I have no empathy for evil.

[@baronhelmut2701]

@@SpxcyMxyo dunno what that is supposed to tell me. If you are insinuating that evil is always evil no matter who its applied to, congrats, you fell for the trap of dark triad personalities. They feed on this exact belief of yours.

[@SpxcyMxyo]

@@baronhelmut2701 I'm relating to you bud.

[@lenaleong4894]

Thank you

[@snipergaming2639]

Contrary to popular belief, that they are just high in cognitive empathy. Some are very high in affective empathy too. Dark empaths are usually your typical empath that has turned bad, often as a result of abuse they themselves have had to bear at some point in their lives. They often reach a point where they stop caring for others and detract themselves from other peoples emotions etc... For this reason I hesitate to call Dark empaths Covert-Narcissists, as is suggested in this video.

[@courtneysigler5984]

I agree with this so much.

[@taelyrlazke473]

So so sooo accurate. It’s quite sad actually. I grew up with narcs but dated a dark empath like me. I thought he was a narc but then was like well he’s my mirror so am I a narc? But I seen in him what I see in me so I’ve been realizing like no I didn’t even think he’s that but he definitely is but it’s cuz he gave up. But I think god sent me him as a gift. Then we had a son. I refuse to believe he is lost completely like most narcs I’ve known. He’s still in there. I’ve learned time and time again I can’t save him or anyone else I’ve tried to. But I can love him unconditionally until one day he realizes all this. I’ve told him but he’s not at the point of being able to truly comprehend what I am explaining he thinks he’s a monster and there’s no hope left for him. But I see so clearly that that’s not true.

[@SpxcyMxyo]

Yeah, abuse will make you feel like you're the problem.

[@gnashsang]

I am a dark empath. I was raised by a malignant grandiose narcissist father that used to beat me at six years old for something as simple as not putting away a pair of scissors. I’m not emotionally detached from people that are in my life and I consider them friends or loved ones. If you do something to someone I care about I will destroy you. I’m very cruel, and can be quite grandiose. But I don’t have an overwhelming sense of entitlement. I used to seek out narcissists and ruin them when they crossed me. I’m retired now and keep to myself, so stay clear of cluster B personality types and my life is much more peaceful.

[@OFFICIALAZURITEKING]

From your story is the main reason my physical dad was murdered while I was still a child. I figured how more curruotd I will be if that man was around. My brothers got the worst of the abuse, yeah, real abuse. I would had it done myself if I knew what I know now. Maybe actually let him be tortured staying alive from all the stuff he had committed to hose he claimed he loved, even Mom.

[@stevenbruce4143]

Omg.. you’re a wussy.. that’s all he did? Grow up 😂

[@stevenbruce4143]

@@aguilacoorswait till you meet a sociopath or physcopath 😂

[@gnashsang]

@@stevenbruce4143 I have tangled with a female sociopath. She gutted me like a fish. She played me so well that I didn’t have a relationship with another woman for over twenty years

[@baronhelmut2701]

Yes yes yes. You have understood the dark empath. I love you brother. With all my heart and soul. Keep up the good work. One day we will have eradicated all psychopaths, narcissists and Machiavellians.

[@marcginthe5d]

It’s not narcissist vs narcissist- the narcissist makes the empath feel dark - that’s what it is

[@christaylor8472]

I agree. An empathy in dark circumstances naturally result in a damaged empath. But, not dark in nature.

[@exus913]

I have alot of hate towards narcissists, especially after the girl that damaged me, but I would never abuse a good person, does that make me a dark empath?

[@exus913]

Maybe Machiavellian...

[@CB19087]

Projective identification

[@azaleaslight3599]

@@Applehead78 being Dangerous Powerful & Formidable is a good virtue. It's what all true Empaths are, Being Dangerous Powerful & Formidable doesn't equal being manipulative cruel mean or controlling & abusive It's means we have the POWER to stop Evil And we use it as such A true Empath cannot just leave a Narcissist to go on and get another victim bragging how you got away A true Empath turns it all around on a narcissist Uses all the narcissist has dumped into them BACK ONTO THE NARCISSIST in effect destroying the narcissist on every level Making the narcissist FEAR even going near another womean/relationship We take all the narcissist Power away, showing them they actually had no inner Power themselves but that I Did And I used it accordingly NO WAY can an True Empath (I don't even like that word what gets described as an Empath is inaccurate) No way could a True Empath ever just leave and let a person go on to do same to another an Empath is the narcissists RECKONING KARMA come back at them usually in a later part in life so they got no Come back won't can't come back, they disappear from everything go hide We are the ones that grow up and DOB in child abusers too we speak up as kids risking dire punishment no-one listens we wait until we are older have the Power to STOP them and do We NEVER EVER COULD LET A KNOWN ABUSER TO CONTINUE ABUSING MORE INNOCENTS and we DONT we use all WITHIN OUR POWER to stop them An Empath has the ability to take all a narcissists Power away That's why people like Mr Grannon here and his mate Sam Vakmin HATE ON Empaths so much try to Demonise us as much as possible They know we aren't afraid of them, we watch observe give many opportunities to see different to what we are seeing we even tell the narcissist what we are going to do They just laugh at us and DONT BELIEVE US then get all I'm a victim now when they get back ALL they gave out for years to many from ONE PERSON ... I remember the ex saying to me My God I didn't expect this from you! No he didn't that was Kind of the point Empaths are EXTREMELY POWERFUL loaded with True Power from Within Empaths use that Power accordingly to put things back in BALANCE again You won't hear an Empath complaining much or victimising themselves They see Know get shown what its all about Also an Empath would never Disrespect the people they help & heal by not being in the same room as the ones sent to them, would never do this distance one size fits all online 'healing' either We would never Disrespect another that way. If I can't be in the same room with you don't Respect you enough to even be in your presence personally then I got no Business teaching healing delivering any of life's messages to you!

[@elainelee4828]

I was murmuring “covert narcissist” one second before your naming them. High level of Neuroticism is their distinctive feature, (particularly in the form of frustration) higher than their overt counterparts. Overts are quite prone to anger as well.

[@roserowley911]

The dark empath has the dark triad markers however unlike NPD they do physically feel emotions and absolutely find that part of themselves revolting and hence they project out the dark triad traits on others in their self loathing and shame which is common in the underpinnings NPD 🤗

[@melissahutton2586]

I could never decide if my husband was a covert narcissist because he displayed some empathy for others. I could see it there and hope he could have some for me in various situations over the years. It was always lacking. I decided it didn’t matter if he had any empathy or not it wasn’t enough! The degrading, neglect and physical violence put my life in danger so many times and at the very least I was in emotional or physical pain everyday. I left him for the second and last time last week. I’m early in recovery. I have him blocked so he couldn’t get back in my head. The trauma bond feels like I will die if I’m not with him, though the reverse is much more likely. These videos help validate my decision. Thank you, Richard.

[@paulamewies4798]

Could be me. Please hang in there, I'm 3 months in, you will heal. Please don't break no contact, it's absolutely vital in order to break the trauma bond. Self care is vital, and rely on family and friends x

[@Linda-ki5xh]

Hello Melissa, welcome! Richard is the best to help guide us, and the support can feel like the family we couldn't have. No more walking on eggshells and the gut cramp of betrayal. Stay strong, it is so worth it. Sending love and support

[@jasminasm9182]

Be strong, be brave, don’t give in and most importantly love yourself, treat yourself, praise yourself every morning!!! There is man out there who will treat you properly only when you treat yourself properly. Live life without fear, shame and guilt. Leave the bastard to “marinate “ in his bastard juices and longer you let him more he will feel like shit. He deserves every moment of his misery. Trust me he’ll try to lure you with sweet talks and gifts if you don’t persist in no contact. You only owe the unconditional love to yourself. You were not brought to this world for him to torture you. You are brought to this world to live life to best of your abilities. Love and light💜

[@savewaterdrinkwine3802]

Keep going Melissa....I feel your pain, but believe me it will get easier....my covert narc husband discarded me eight months ago, I thought I was going to die, he was the air I breathed.........Now, the peace in my life is priceless, I still have a way to go, but I beg you, hang in there.....peace will come ❤

[@savewaterdrinkwine3802]

@@jasminasm9182 ❤

[@martefact]

I was only today reflecting on the very idea of the Narcissitic 'Slight' in the context of the fragile N - how it forms and how it manifests. In my experience when these particular folks are 'slighted' they tend to find ways to mete out punishments - almost under the radar. Its amazing how important it is to take notice of the feelings you get when these weird covert attacks come upon you. They can be --- and often are so subtle and so inverted as to appear to be generosities granted to you by virtue of their - well - 'Virtue' really . But you will always have a gut sense of dissonance. Something will feel 'off' and the memory of that moment will remain - like a lingering odor in your emotional memory - and in my case often a very vivid recollection of the setting for whatever is meted out in covert vengeance. The dissonance for me was usually born out of witnessing the proffered pseudo-care and feeling like I'd just been robbed or violated at the same time.. A very odd but very distinctive feeling, but consistent across more than a few people of this ilk I had in my life. An example of the very common under the radar attack in the form of narc-jargon is for a fake apology using the words..."I'm sorry you feel that way'". The first time I heard those words and watched them pass across the gnashers of people who slid them out at me like a verse from some narc bible, I remember the sensations I felt. I had no mind or logic to apply to the words or the meaning - just a sensation of - I suppose - dissonance. I heard the word 'sorry' and 'feel' and then experienced a weird sensation of shame and blame coming through me. Staying on the lookout for those sensations has become my baseline MO with all humans now. Glad to report I am now invincible! When you gather and collect those veritable time warps of very peculiar ways in which these people get their daggers out under the table at you, it becomes a really obvious, and frankly tragic condition of conduct to behold. Once you see that picture of dots of experience all joined up, there is a magnitude of relief and growth that is truly liberating. Listening to this little video warms the heart of my knowing of the skills and resources I now have. Because I put in the hard graft to look for the dots to draw that true picture more times now than I would be comfortable sharing. But hey - Never too late for freedom I say! I say with these people - collect some dots of sensation to form a map which is sure to help you navigate a way out of that trap! You might not be able to explain the sensations yet but when you have collected a few you start to see patterns emerge, and then you see it is really not about you at all. And there - is your exit strategy right there! Just my very long tuppence ha'penny worth. :) The topic is very current for me atm.

[@AZDC99]

I'm not ashamed NOT to "just grey rock it" as advised in these NPD recovery circles. It's exactly that "under-the-radar" attack you thankfully articulate that way. Same here!@ "I'm sorry you feel" this way is always something I've heard from one of the most narcissistic people I've ever known in my life, my Mom! It's such an incredibly dismissive statement at a moment that it should not be said yet it's so under-the-radar that it makes anyone who complains about it look like they're oversensitive or "crazy" when they're portraying it to a newly recruited gain of fellow soulless ghouls. The "dark empath" level? It almost sounds like a shaming term towards enpaths who have had enough, yet a defensive for narcs that should have been thrown out a long time ago. I have been watching these narcissism channels for years and finally got rid of a few that were caused me trouble in my life. Anyhow, this darkened path term is something that just doesn't make sense to me and it sounds like it's causing more confusion than clarity. ( I have not heard Richard Brandon's opinion yet on it because I'm only a minute into the video, but having learned the "DARK EMPATH" term, having at least see one other video like this with that term, I think it's overcomplicating something that we had down simple

[@siyaindagulag.]

Perceptive. Or intuitive, rather. Strikes a chord. Well done btw.

[@CuShorts]

I could consider myself a Dark Empath. its a philosophical distinction, in my opinion. Calling this hidden narcissism is a massive copout. There is no clinical definition for being an "Empath". The term is relatively modern. The closest thing imo would be a HSP (highly sensitive person, or somone with mirror-touch synesthesia) who has no moral quandries about breaking the "rules". I have been tormented by narcissists my entire life. I have waffled between understanding, compassion, and avoidance as a solution to this seemingly innate issue in the human condition. I have come to the ongoing conclusion that I hate them, they are mental parasites, and are worthy of the disgust most people rightfully assign them. The moment i detect any sort of narcissism, i simply stop giving a fuck. As far as i am concerned you are my enemy. I dont go out of my way to torment these insecure broken souls, but i absolutely will if i am provoked. I know i am absolutely flawed but this is how i feel. The whole topic is a bit of a clickbaity way of dealing with the natural, rational reaction to our innately narcissistic society.

[@kissaniko5723]

Exactly!

[@krstnenepoviem8250]

I'm glad you said that!

[@AZDC99]

You just brilliantly covered an Encyclopedia abridged of how exactly how I feel and deal with it too. The ONLY WAY to beat a psycho is to be a better psychopath back at them essentially, indeed! It's exactly where I should be because I don't like my kindness being taken for weakness and I get pretty mean if someone's trying to mess with me too. Beer cheers to all others who relate too! (Now I will go back to being my naturally peaceful self... but I never could have gotten there if I didn't start fighting back and doing just what you're saying myself!)

[@Holypikemanz]

the "narcissism" thing felt so shoe horned in. Not every single human is a damn narcissist. Loved the rest of your statement as well. We live in a fake victim culture because being a victim makes you a celebrity and gives you special social protection. Look at scumbag Amber Heard, fake victim, secretly a physical abuser of Johnny Depp and 90% of society sided with the poor little female at first. Plenty of lgbt act like terrorists, threatening and bullying ppl while have the protection of a fake victim. Fake victim narcissists and their 1000 selfies can burn for all I care.

[@Immortal_coil4]

On point.. I'm the same. I have plenty of empathy for others, but when I get crossed by someone, I get more than even, especially when it comes to narcissists they seem to gravitate towards me only to be knocked down a peg or two.

[@pamelaprivette5361]

Perhaps a non-clinical definition---YET SO VERY REAL! Any person who is intuitive (which empaths are)---and uses their intuition to exploit, manipulate, and control others, FOR THE DELIBERATE, CALCULATED PURPOSE OF HARMING THEM---is a dark empath, in my book. I was raised by such a (psychotic) person and I know it is VERY real! I'm glad you have made this video to make people aware of this fact!

[@BeautifulZeroUK]

The thing that gets me is the whole "we are perfect and they are the one with the faults that we should be worried about". No one is perfect and I can't help but see myself in any "bad" traits people reel off about others. BUT I feel thats quite healthy. If I'm conscious of how I may be detrimental towards others I feel I'm less likely to subconsciously be a hinderance to others. YES I'm not perfect but at least that gives me the scope for improvement individually. I do aim and want the best. Sorry if this comes off as defensive, I'm trying to learn :)

[@kaylaschroeder1]

Insightful. Underrated comment. 👍🏼

[@pomodrum3208]

Anyone who calls themselves an 'empath' is essentially bragging, humble brag or not. It's a way of signalling one's supposed uniqueness, so there's a red flag right away.

[@flowerpower4944]

True Empaths are very genuine and compassionate people 💫💫

[@pomodrum3208]

@Flower Power True 'empaths', whatever that means, wouldn't need to signal to others that they're an empath - they would just be, and not refer to themselves in those terms online.

[@monicageorgson4870]

@@pomodrum3208 Exactly. It’s so cringey

[@nataliebutler]

It's not. Some people might use it that way, but others might just be attempting to explain their experience. Don't assume everyone is the same.

[@pomodrum3208]

@Natalie Butler How does one 'experience' being an empath as opposed to, say, a run of the mill person with a high degree of empathy? It's just a buzzword, and I suggest that any person who waves a buzzword around as a distinct identity at least has some issues if not narcissistic.

[@bredaspacapan6118]

True empath doesn't talk about being an empath, true empath you observe and you can feel them right away, they have an energy that is truly different and you always feel relaxed around them and pulled to them... they also rarely complain and just do what must be done - for a person or a group or whoever/whatever to make them feel good, acknowledged, accepted, loved etc... The presence of an empath is felt with the 6th sense... Hopefuly i make sense with what i wanted to say 😬✌️

[@OceanicPearlz1]

I once met someone who actually was faking being an empath and having a disability. Perhaps it was the way she was boasting about herself. Meanwhile I only mentioned I am one when she dragged me into drama that absolutely didn’t have to happen with me dragged in. You don’t need to believe me. Though there are differences. Feel the environment usually the genuine empath is quietly observing not as talkative around strangers especially if introverted. On the phone this girl was talking the most and pretty much gossiping about others meanwhile me i was the quiet one who didn’t reach out first usually and just observing you know putting the puzzle pieces together. Only empaths would understand another empath. Well more specifically only another INFJ or INFP could understand another INFJ.

[@OceanicPearlz1]

Like a forensic scientist trying to solve a case

[@bredaspacapan6118]

@@OceanicPearlz1 i totaly believe you!! ❤️

[@baronhelmut2701]

You do not understand. A dark empath is very aware of his/her personality type. Other than usual dark triad members who were born this way, dark empaths made a conscious decision to be this way for the greater good of the people around them. They are literally doing it to hurt other dark triad members.

[@tertiaholeyfield8704]

Sometimes people don't know they are empaths until later in life. They know they are different than others but they don't know why until they are exposed to the information along their journey. Then they put the puzzle pieces together in hindsight and it's their Aha moment.

[@herbalina]

Sometimes we have to be the grey rock though. That may come across as detachment when it's really a coping strategy. Anyone who has inadvertently become the "agony aunt" in the relationship knows what I mean.

[@abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz-z7u]

0:42 I cannot relate more, I'm highly empathic but completely in a cognitive way, I don't really care for them and feel their emotions but I understand what they are going through, and I crave attention but I'm socially awkward and kind of anxious but I get along and sometimes dominate and sometimes don't

[@The_Kiosk]

My mom was a covert narcissist and I have some but not all of these traits. The rage I experience, if I do experience it, is typically a slow burn or internalized disappointment more than anything else. It's hard to avoid becoming what's been imprinted on me. Even earnest attempts feel like deceptions to me.

[@templeguide556]

My mums a covert to and I cannot wait to never speak to her again she’s nothing but poison

[@The_Kiosk]

@@templeguide556 one day she will be gone and you'll feel better. Then, maybe a month or a year down the line, you'll find yourself with an idea or an experience you should share with her. But she'll be gone. I have my issues with my late mother but i also still love and miss her.

[@templeguide556]

@@The_Kiosk I need to start my life over again. What lead me to Richard’s channel is the same thing that lead me to destroy my own life. Btw Grannon is cluster b. Bpd or narcissist I don’t know, but he’s toxic.

[@sunnyd9321]

I'm a dark empath, though I have no abusive history. I was raised very well and I have a loving family. However, I started to realize around childhood how different I was since it never bothered me that I had no friends. I tried, but people bore me terribly. I just can't care. The idea of true love and true companionship is very romantic and appealing to me, but I could never get that close to people; I've tried. However, I'm very aware of how people tick, and I'm great at appearing "on their side" or orchestrating a positive light about me to earn sympathy, pity, or recognition to get something out of people. I don't go out of my way to hurt anyone, but I do recognize the great potential to mess someone up if I'm threatened in just the right way.

[@regularjoe8925]

Are you copy right striking Sam Vaknin’s Channel?

[@askvic611]

You are wrong, what is being labeled a "dark empath" is not the same as a covert narcissist but simply a recovered(!!!) empath, some people might call that person now "dark" for not being available anymore to be someone elses narcissistic supply or emotional tampon (and now capable and willing to give someone a taste of their own medicine in return if necessary, like "gaslighting" for example)! That's like labeling someone who now mastered self-defense a "thug", i would rather question the person who is doing the re-labeling than!

[@timmmychanga]

Beyond excited to watch! 🔥❤️🙏

[@elevenpoisons2484]

This one person on my mind has a bit of all of these traits and seems like shes had it worse than others but really just has similar experiences if not less (not invalidaing anything but its dramatised pretty largely) she Has extreme disregulated emotions and is diagnosed with bpd but shes the kind who makes other bpd sufferer's viewed as narcs because she talks about her problems all the time even when its in poor timing. Theres so much insecurity and need for attention but has no desire to truly be there for others unlesss its someone shes in love with or clings to someone kind and doeant want to lose them and their "therapy help", company and generosity. When those same people, however, want to have her support, its very half arsed with a few loving words then right away back to talking about her. She mad me feel appreciated but when things are unfair and i rightfully tell her with no sugar coating, im suddenly careless. In reality, im just drained.

[@benhagstrom2185]

I feel like I tick a lot of these boxes internally, but I'm not okay with hurting people to get what I want.

[@roserowley911]

I’ve heard you before saying that their isn’t an empath... you can’t have one without the other?

[@azaleaslight3599]

He Hates on Empaths This guy IS a narcissist and they hate Empaths Empaths are their KARMA and they know it is their Biggest threat so they have to teach pretend they don't exist

[@qualix7]

When I was growing up, I was hyper-empathetic. Occasionally to my own detriment, I was sensitive to the feelings (or my perception of them) of others. One time a significantly smaller boy who I’d just met became very aggressive toward me during a little ball game. The only way to stop it was to punish his aggression with some of my own, which I did with great discomfort and reluctance. But I tolerated his violence toward me much longer than I wanted to. A few years ago I tried to understand this part of my nature, and I stumbled upon the term “empath”. But pursuing the term only led to a bunch of self-satisfied airheads going on about their psychic-like super power. I’m glad to see Mr. Grannon bringing it up.

[@pallasathena1369]

Wednesday Addams type - can get into someone's head to dissect and deal with them. Possibly they only undo toxic people who deserve it as they will just ignore anyone who doesn't cross them.

[@hsmith2941]

Omg that sounds exactly like me

[@bouchrakartobi180]

Thank you Richard for all this knowledge that you bring to us

[@MDWD]

Can't wait!!

[@catwalkster]

The people that call themselves an empath are the same people that call themselves an old soul or a lightworker. They are either npd or bpd.

[@skepchica]

Lol Not at all.

[@catwalkster]

@skepchica 😆😆😆😆 Lemme guess... Old soul, empath, Lightworker, starseed and highly sensitive? 😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆 A person with the character traits of an old soul (so called ) would not feel the need to tell others he is an old soul. Nor would that person see themselves like that. They are saying to others: " i am Wiser, more knowledgeable, more introspective than you. I am enlightened and see and know things you dont. I am better than you. " Because those are the traits of so called old souls. ONLY people who call themselves old souls talk and write about old souls and their so called characteristics. 😆😆 A true king, never ever feels the need to tell everyone he's king. So, is your father a borderliner like you and your mother? Or is he a Narcissist?

[@skepchica]

@@catwalkster None of that, just a freakin victim of narcissistic abuse with eyes. Et toi?

[@skepchica]

@@catwalkster Im sorry, are you asking about my father? My father was extremely physically abusive. Not so much a narcissist, a Vietnam war vet with terrible coping mechanisms. Or are you asking me about the father's of people that I would consider empaths? The ones I know aren't chest thumpers, nor have I asked much about their parents-- generally, they just seem to be people who have a heightened sense of sensitivity and can relate easily to the pain of other people. These ridiculous generalizations coupled with your venom is very concerning because it's not just simply incorrect, it's bullying. I'm not sure what joy you derive from making people that are sensitive? To me this comes across as deeply concerning. Could you explain why you think it's funny, please? I could be missing something.

[@Rmed.x]

How can I stop these delusions (more like day dreams) I am tired of feeling this way. (The cycle you mentioned) I don't feel like I am going anywhere. I honestly don't want to hurt others (in fact I really wish for fullfiling relationships), but I also can't take a joke. Tired of Trying to be Perfect. Tired of daydreaming most of the time, along with music. Tired of seeing myself waste months together dreaming about the future. (And then I will do this & then I will do that) I feel so stupid😢😢😢😢 It's humiliating. I feel like nobody respects me. And I hate myself for that. My father probably has the similar problem. Don't get me wrong; he is very competent. He has sacrificed a lot of things for us. He is a great person, except when he looses his shit. Usually after someone says something. Then it's unbearable and really scary. He probably doesn't understand this in the moment. But then guilt soon takes over & he usually says sorry by giving gifts. Same with me. I can't take any criticism. I don't know why. I don't know where it started. But I will definitely tell you, even if I am cold and avoidant, In reality, it is so so incredibly painful to not be able to make someone you love happy. I hate to feel this inadequate all the time. I feel I need to Re-Learn how to have conversations. Thank you for the video. 🙏