Forgiveness is the measure of love. When someone forgives you that's because he/she loves you. If you are not forgiven then I'm afraid you have your answer. At the same time we need to be very lenient as most people do not understand the dynamic of forgiveness and we need to pray for them. Forgiveness is a blessing that we need to ask for as forgiveness is not human but divine. Yet knowing this and having a genuine relationship with my immense Lord I find forgiveness extremely challenging. My head understand what I just wrote about but my heart has a very hard time asking God for this grace "par excellence." In other word much easier said than done. Ô Lord have mercy on me.