The NO LIMIT SOLDIER: Are You OVER Being A Girl BOSS?

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[@neriahwilliams6906]

You are truly doing The Most Highs work Chloe. These jems you are dropping on us and really the next generation is wonderful. My nervous system loves coming to this channel. Those who get it will and those who don't won't. That moving in silence is 🔑.

[@DivineShine30]

As a young black women when I express that I have no deep desire to work like a mule or climb the corporate ladder I get harsh backlash. I work to justify my expenses and lifestyle not to be overworked and always exhausted .I’ve always been a Soft Girl and continue to be one.

[@TheCelmap]

Don't forget to save and invest your money as well to take long time offs whenever you desire 😊.

[@DivineShine30]

@@TheCelmap 😌

[@dinkyboss]

Exactly! I work enough to suit my needs, no more, no less. I’ve learned from these women to NOT become a mule

[@Datb2]

Agreed this is why I do just enough to satisfy myself and no one else

[@ira_herself997]

@@TheCelmapinvesting as much as needed for money to work for us, otherwise we will stay poor and lazy.

[@thebadasscoder298]

"How many black women are made to feel that their value is only tied to how much that they can do for others?" - Chloe

[@annasirri87]

As a wife and mom of 2 working from home (IT), I decided to hire housekeeping to come clean my house bi-weekly cos I was tired and wanted to use my weekends to rest and focus my energy for self care. I received backlash from friends and family. Thanks to you Chloé, I did not listen to them.

[@HandmaidsTaleComingForUsAll]

Good for you! I’m thinking about doing this. I’m tired of working during the week only to be a maid at my home.

[@Igbobabexoxo]

This is my goal!! Main reason I got into IT! Let me have my family and work remotely, pay someone else to do the house work! lol More power to you sis 🩷

[@dablondeambition]

And this goes to show how the "soft girl" life can be tweaked and made your own-finding what works best for you and yours! I love it😊

[@Black-Butterfly-B1]

I don’t tell friends and fam half the things I do. During the pandemic, I had a home health worker for my Dad several hours a day, 4 or 5 days a week. My Dad lived with me and I worked from home !!! Yep. Level up lux life.

[@adayinthelight7575]

I do the same thing. I’m a teacher and had to do the same thing.

[@PrettyPrincess9609]

I’m 27 and I’m tired of being a “ girl boss “. I have overworked myself for years and I’m tired of working in Corporate America. I am also tired of working 8 plus hours everyday and having to cook and do chores after I work. I definitely would love a soft girl life style and my goal is to to be a stay at home wife.

[@imo.124]

Because we weren't created by God to be working this hard!! We are tired and need good God fearing providing husbands so we can be the feminine women God created us to be.

[@doll.ov.poetrii4682]

​@@imo.124💯

[@bellebeaute]

Same age as you, same goals sis. We'll get there 💓.

[@morrickushuff4127]

​@@imo.124Ma'am, Unfortunately for y'all the ratio is 60% women and 40% men so some women are going come up short...But add in men who are willing providers the numbers really drop in y'all favor....Even stud lesbian women are falling back from the provider role with women....But hey good luck

[@shay-shayhandlestolenbyyt]

My sister n law went from 350,000 a year as a attorney to being taken of by my brother while he works two jobs. Good for her!

[@ka8155]

Good for her. That's what I need in my life!

[@purpleflows5680]

I love you as an SIL. Women first. I’m the same way about my brother’s wife. When she said told me she is stopped working to care for my toddler niece and a special needs son, I said, “Yes! That’s how it should be.”

[@beautiful_wonderfullymade]

Me too. I strongly desire that

[@Tee-Star]

Lovely, yet risky❤😢

[@doll.ov.poetrii4682]

​@@Tee-StarCorporate America is also risky; especially when we consider what it does to the health of a woman and the strong potential for it to also discard her at any moment. It's not a risk free option.

[@malikawilson7071]

At 33, being single and childless I have absolutely NO Desire to move up any corporate ladders or be a “boss”. I prefer to invest and thrive in my femininity. I love eating healthy, going to therapy, working out and getting my hair and nails done and doing the inner work to be my best and highest self. What I find to be difficult is coming across men who want to see you in your feminine.

[@poelomokgotho8127]

I’m 30 and have a 6 year old. I’ve learned my lesson and now I’m creating wealth for my son. And also looking after myself. I love this softness for us

[@malikawilson7071]

@poelomokgotho8127 Me too! I love that for you! You DESERVE!

[@irisfomben4626]

It is very true! Finding men that are ok with us being in our femininity can sometimes be challenging. I have some male coworkers and neighbors that seemed to be uncomfortable with me being in my femininity , well dressed and outgoing when we are at events . They make uncomfortable comments and it honestly feels like they are jaleous ( even tho they definitely are into women)

[@beautiful_wonderfullymade]

@@malikawilson7071you are truly what I aspire to be. I want to be in my feminine soo bad. I’ve been in a toxic relationship with a man who wants me to work harder than him that I’ve lost myself.

[@8croberts]

Yep! Couldn’t agree more. Finding the right guy has proven to be a bit challenging but of course it’s not impossible! Rooting for us all!

[@andrealambert2425]

I literally cringe when somebody tells me I'm a strong black woman. I'm strong because I have to be Not because I want too be🥴

[@royaltroot1014]

Someone said it to me at a new job and immediately I thought I need to relax and take it easy.

[@diopfifi4937]

Very damaging label

[@kirky3051]

I’ve stopped telling people about my struggles and my life story for this very reason. Hearing “you’re so strong” is nauseating. I’m not. I need support.

[@morrickushuff4127]

​@@kirky3051Ma'am, Support is one thing but most women are asking for a whole slave.....So where is this island that are full willingly male slaves ?

[@BlendedBarbieDoll]

I’m ready for black girls and women to live softly. I have never had a desire to work like a dog, hustle, girl boss etc. I like to decorate our home, plan birthday parties for our children, and chill lol

[@karzymimi42]

Louder for the ones in the upper nose bleed section!!

[@andylee4299]

Don't let this "soft" talk fool you. None of this is soft. A stay at home wife/mother is work just like going to the office everyday. It's just the latest social media talking point.

[@drbrimarriedanerdyengineer2312]

Honestly, I'm working on transitioning to living a "softer life", and I know that it will take time. I'm tired of being overwhelmed and overworked 👎🏾

[@poelomokgotho8127]

Same here

[@SassyNan]

Same here

[@annisalewis3792]

Me too

[@jazzn.h]

I had to come to the realization that being a career driven woman was not my identity. I love freelancing and being a creative professional but working in corporate or pursuing a 6 figure job is not me at all. I value a quiet life, slow and intentional living so that’s what I focus on, just existing as I am is good enough for me. 💕

[@Datb2]

This !!

[@MsKim510]

I'm a creative professional myself, I relate to this. I love what I do, but not at the expense of working myself to death.

[@MsPhillgood]

As an older woman i too can relate to the dr in the 1st clip. 5 yrs ago i noticed symptoms such as hand tremors and sleep issues and informed my then significant other that i don't think i can continue working at this level and i wish to retire early, at that point, within 10yrs. Almost 2 yrs ago, while i was away taking care of my mother, my "other" took his carry on bag and left. He's 8 yrs older and im in my 50s. So ladies, make wise choices. Ive worked myself so ragged that in July of this year i drove myself to the ER because of chest pain and now require regular visits with a cardiologists. Don't work yourself to death. Put yourself first always and focus on soft girl era because you only live once. ❤

[@ninawestlake14]

Omg! Dear older lady, all i can say is that the trash/leach took itself out. Better to learn late than never. Take very good care of yourself. One day at a time. It is well. Much love and thanks for the advice.

[@veri_cottagefairy]

i’ve always been soft, and my family tried to “toughen me up” growing up for some reason. it never occurred to them to simply treat me a little more gently, because at now 27, being soft is why i’m happily coupled with a man who works incredibly hard to keep me “soft”. im not a girlboss, im not an ‘alpha’ baddie (all power to those ladies that are) because it’s just not me. never has been and it feels fraudulent when i attempt it along with an energy drain.

[@cocomocha]

Same so relatable

[@amoreparrisbeauty3581]

Yes yes!!

[@stephanienelly90]

I’m an engineer and I work from home. I’m off 3 days a week and men always ask what do you do with all that time… me, shopping, doctors appointments, cooking, sleeping, taking myself on dates.. you’ll be naturally soft if you don’t live a hard life!

[@EvaElyse]

I was never into the Girl Boss movement. Always felt like it was for girlies to get validation and prove their worth when we don’t have to do that.

[@dinkyboss]

I was into the girl boss movement because I needed to pay my bills 🤷🏽‍♀️🤣 I’m learning how to pace myself these days

[@chayes3862]

I remember the look on an Uncle's face a few years after burying my father when he said to me so proudly, "but you're a STRONG Black woman, niece!" I fully understood the connotation and responded, "and I didn't ask for any of this." I'll just say by his face he understood the look in my eyes. Be safe out here, some want to put an unnecessary burden on your backs that isn't yours to carry. SET IT DOWN!👌🏽 Be well!💕

[@badluckkittie]

I quit my job and moved to Mexico. All of the money I was saving for retirement at 60 I’m spending now. I love it here.

[@TheNewFeminine]

Congrats.❤️

[@prettynpetty8342]

I recently got promoted at work and the workplace is so toxic that not I had to keep quiet about it. Those who need to know, know. I hate labor. I don’t dream of it anymore or climbing the ladder. I want an easy life. I deserve it. I want to be taken care of and be a housewife. The only manager I want to be is in my own household. I want to break the cycle of working black women. Of course I need to make my own money due to safety but the corporate world literally destroys feminine energy. It’s a gross energy.

[@Tee-Star]

It is safety....and i live the soft life❤

[@bbgirl800]

I just transitoned to being a stay at home mom. My baby is only a few months old. I had a rough night with the baby being up and only getting a few hours sleep. I was rocking her and looking out the window one morning and wondering would i rather be fighting traffic on my 45 minute commute to get abused by patients at the hospital i worked at. No thank you I'm good lol

[@Thegoodlife4me]

I ride my bike for fitness and leisure 💅🏽 several times per week. I sleep until I’m done each morning as I work from home and do not set up my appointments before 10 a.m. I could easily work more as I’m blessed to have a thriving career. Taking care of myself as I desire brings me joy and I feel GREAT 😌. I recommend to all.

[@bythewaterfall8785]

💖💖💖💖

[@ma6542]

What do you do from home sis if you don’t mind me asking

[@Thegoodlife4me]

@@ma6542 I’m a healthcare professional. I have patients that I see virtually and at home sometimes (very minimal). I won’t say what I do exactly (the internet and all) but I have advanced degrees and I have patients lol! Went to school about 7 years (not)including my internships (1.5 more years) so yeah I put in work but what else was I gonna do cause I could see that depending on a “husband” or etc was gonna leave me kinda struggling. I redirected my energy into manifesting opportunities and I did the work. Now I’m kinda chillin 💅🏽 a lil bit lol. I could do more, but the requirement of work and “girl boss, no limit soldier, mentality“ was doing the most and too much in my opinion. My mentor once asked me “why you wanna work so hard all the time? Go enjoy your life and have some fun”. She was my Chloe before Chloe lol …So I took her advice and that’s what I’m doing, I love it she told me I could always go back for my Ph. D etc. and do more “work”. Get even more money but right now enjoy your life. I encourage others to do the same.🥰💕🥰💕

[@Thegoodlife4me]

@@ma6542 I’m a medical practitioner and mainly practice with the use of Telehealth. The pandemic changed the way I do business but I’ve always been able to set my schedule like I want since obtaining the necessary credentials. Get the education or necessary credentialing to make your path easier. 💕☮️

[@mitchikoparrish4646]

I wanted children. I am happy to have a son. I've been a stay at home mom for 13 years. Now that my son is in college, I'm experiencing being a housewife on a whole new level. I am so grateful that my husband doesn't require that I go out and work. It's not that we are rich but, God has provided in a way where I am very fulfilled. I'm not sure what the future holds but I am happy and feel freedom to do what l want. I love volunteering, lunching, feeding the hungry and my favorite is teaching middle schoolers 2 hours a week. Resting is truly a luxury. I'm looking forward to the next chapter in my life with my husband.

[@afrikurl]

You are spot on with your assessment as usual. I was around 28 when I realized that I was tired. I tried changing jobs. It didn’t work. I was still tired. I talked to my then husband and he was basically like everything is fine… but it really wasn’t. I got rid of him a few years later started therapy. Then the pandemic happened. It was the first time in my life that I was able to see that I was doing too much and that none of it was for me. I also saw that I was teaching my daughter to do too much. When things started reopening, she decided that she didn’t want to have after school and Saturday activities every day. We settled on one activity two days a week. I have been able to work remotely and really curate my life, prioritize myself and I love it here.

[@donnamcintosh2109]

A woman has a right to choose whatever path she takes. However, I am being honest when I say that I wouldn't mind if I found a man who loved me enough to tell me that I don't have to work. The only thing I believe in is a woman being educated and skilled. No woman should allow herself to be at a man's mercy. I have heard the conversations from the men online, and the last thing I want is to be married to a man with a warped mentality.

[@egersis8]

Agree 100% with this. I'm Black British and we have the same dynamics here in the UK🇬🇧

[@hashima-isisgordon6601]

I'm 40 and I live in Jamaica and my life since this age is sleeping,exercising, partying,leisure walking,shopping and cleaning my home. I am living my best life and still improving. I pushed away my nursing degree and hostile work environment and rest in my feminine energy.

[@TaylorJohnson1]

My mother "girlbossed" all through her life and pushed me to be the same. She was always the breadwinner in every relationship.

[@Tyler-he4pf]

I feel ashamed of wanting a soft life. I’m surrounded with very black is oppressed and we must strive to achieve the best no matter what you do. The women I’m around are career driven women and educated driven women. I voiced my dreams of being an at home mom/wife and I was looked at as if I was dumb. Both men and women believe I’m living in delusion. For context I’m in college at an HBCU. I’ve learned to just keep quite about it.

[@cocomocha]

Don’t hang around those people

[@chanela.7786]

Ain’t nothing wrong with being a sahm they’re both equally challenging in many ways. It’s so annoying when people try to act like being a mom isn’t hard work when it’s often the most sacrificing role there is and you basically putting everyone above yourself

[@ninawestlake14]

Move in silence until you find you're tribe.

[@ninawestlake14]

​@@chanela.7786💯💯💯

[@meaganj]

Don’t silence your voice but move in silence and align yourself with women who share your same sentiments. However, you are going to open your options for dating and friendship groups to other ethnicities. I had to open my options in both of the areas of friendship and dating with like minded people.

[@MsNice305]

As a black woman in her 40s, who wanted her career and not a family, I hate it here! Sometimes I think about filing bankruptcy and let it all go. Having a career was powerful when I was young, now as a single mom with a daughter, this is not what I want my child to think is goals.

[@islandgirl8067]

I’m no “boss.” Being a boss requires a lot of hard work, sacrifice, & stress. I’ve achieved a certain level of success, but as I get older I’m getting tired of the grind, I want to spend more time doing things I enjoy. I like money & nice things, but don’t want to work myself to death to get them.

[@misskiaralee4134]

People like to think in extremes.. and either way, why do people get upset if a housewife is sitting around doing "nothing" all day? I invite people to go within and be curious as to why that triggers you. This really seems to be a discussion amongst certain minority communities as of late. I am a pilates/barre instructor, majority of my clients are Caucasian and jewish, and this doesn't seem to be an issue, rather the expected norm. These women are soccer moms mostly, organizing girl scouts or shopping universities with their kids, and discussing yearly car upgrades 🤷‍♀️

[@Abidjan-weekly]

I used to live near a Jewish neighborhood. Most of the women are stay at home moms, extremely cultural and dedicated to their roles as homemakers. It was nice seeing that in giant capitalism America.

[@itsstillhair6263]

I don’t think I can handle being completely unemployed. And only being a housewife. I think that would cause boredom and depression. I like the balance .

[@felicerobinson]

The pandemic was a hard re-set for me through which I made major changes including relocating to a sunny location, quit smoking, 100% remote work and an, all around, softer life, made possible by Chloe having raised my conscious awareness to the possibility. Thank you! ❤

[@shirlsshirls8594]

I love this, congratulations 🎉

[@DivineShine30]

You go girl 👏🏽

[@Balgees24]

Why anyone would want to wake-up and ready get ready for work 🙄 and set on the traffic? And deal with all the stress from work? And repeat it again tomorrow.

[@Ruthforme]

The black community is way too dependent on its women being the leaders, but what else do you do when the men are refusing to step up? I’m in the process now of learning to embracing my feminine while relinquishing my masculine and it is extremely hard. We get into so my arguments and I don’t even understand what I’m doing wrong because it’s just my default.😮‍💨

[@TheCelmap]

😢 you're so right my sister 😢.

[@Tee-Star]

That's my goal for 2024. I wish us luck, sis❤

[@janemu-mx1ec]

We got trapped into thinking there's no lane but this one, it's a very effective LIE who's success is tied to our fear. Break out and explore, this world Is full of other "lanes". I really love this for BW, we're done being mules and I'm here for the awakening 😊

[@towel8115]

Yes ❤tired of working what people don't realize is that woman we're not meant to work but men was Built for it it's pretty much Biblical

[@rabbiyah5]

When I tell people I’m retiring at the end of the year they congratulate me and I explain no no I’m going out on disability because working since the age of 19 gave me: early arthritis, sciatica, carpal tunnel, immune deficiency, and made my cycle start coming TWICE a month. Girl bossing destroyed my body and I HAVE to retire to recover.

[@Tee-Star]

I may not.go on disability, but I get 1 year of maternity leave...paid. I'll stay soft. Thanks for sharing ❤1

[@cisforchanel]

as a 2000 baby, i've noticed the shift between how relationships/dynamic w men have changed in tv/movies & even books, I remember watching late 90s/early 00s shows/movies where the girl in her divine feminine was the one who got the guy she wanted (usually thru a 'makeover') & then sometime in the early 2010s it shifted to the tomboy "one-of-the-guys" type girls who would essentially steal the guy from the popular/primpy girly girl. I've tried those tactics in middle/early hs & they didn't work & looking back ofc not, the media really set us up but I'm glad we're getting back to our divine feminine roots!

[@Amy-wo1sr]

Not the man of their own dreams 😭😭😭

[@poelomokgotho8127]

I’ve always prided myself is being strong and independent. After being diagnosed with depression and anxiety, I decided to let go of the strength. It has changed my life. #formergirlboss#feminist

[@lchervilgilles1]

Today i went out for coffee with some ladies from my tennis club. We were chatting about life and work. As soon as i said that i didnt want to work anymore all 4 ladies looked at me sideways. Thats ok, they can have it. I didnt even feel the need to defend myself 🙃

[@VerleanHurd]

The funny thing is, these are the same "tired" women who looked down on stay at home wives/moms for years. Talked all that ish just to want to be them. Aint that a kick in the head.😂😂😂😂

[@luw5244]

@@erobinson5942I can’t say this enough. The stay at home wives that are living that life are the ones with the trust funds/generous husbands. So if you’re going to stay at home, marrying well is a must or you’ll be choosing the hard life - just at home this time.

[@VerleanHurd]

@@erobinson5942 Maybe. I don't know any tho. That's what fifty fifty women have to say to make themselves feel better.

[@VerleanHurd]

@@erobinson5942 I can assure you they do. Just because YOU don't have that type of man. Stop projecting.

[@kellijasper5912]

⁠@@daniellediaz2516can’t speak for the poster but can speak to the conversation I have been privy to from the 40+ women. It is generally the same women who put down those who chose to more if their energy and effort into their families or who wasn’t as career driven who are now complaining about working or the low level men they are married to. Just had a conversation the other day with someone she is the primary breadwinner always has been and now she just wants rest and peace but knows if she gets rid of her husband it will cost her significantly.

[@VerleanHurd]

@@Blissedx IKR. He who laughs last. Laughs the loudest.

[@r.w.395]

I have reclaimed my femininity since the pandemic, my business was shut down for 3 + months. I actually got to walk around in the neighborhood I’d been paying for for years once I got a taste of freedom I never looked back! I decided after one month back in business I could work smarter instead of harder, I closed my shop but continue to freelance. Best decision I ever made. I do Pilates, Yoga, Barre, hit the gym and do regular self care routines daily. I feel and look amazing! 🥂to Aging backwards💅🏾

[@Timetrae]

I know that’s right sis!! Gosh that’s what I want for me!!!

[@TheCelmap]

I crying knowing that you're wining. So happy for you sis, hope to be there in no time. I've work and saving/investing my money non stop. Hope to be free of corporation within 5 years single or married 😊

[@angelika87]

the true flex of black women in the USA is investing and early retirement NOT working to a early grave

[@egersis8]

Absolutely love this😊. Same happened to me; I made very similar changes. I'm only sorry it didn't happen YEARS ago🇬🇧!

[@Pretzelgal]

This is very interesting because we as women and especially black women have been conditioned for so long to be in control and perfect. I struggle with perfectionism, and until a few years ago, I didn't understand what it meant. I am in the process of unlearning. Exhaustion, frustration and depression have been normalized for women and labeled as "strength" however, being strong every day is killing us. Life isn't meant to be a fight everyday.

[@cocomocha]

I came from a family of women who married men who cannot produce.I’ve always liked softer things makeup clothes heels hair Art and creative stuff.I was told “a woman’s work is never done”🤢I’m literally not attracted to that type of thinking at all .I attract men who offer me things I won’t be anyone’s mule .I enjoy being a soft relaxed calm woman.

[@user-tn6fg2du6v]

Being a girl boss doesn’t suit our biology if we really want to talk about it lol

[@Timetrae]

It does not!! Absolute TRUTG!!

[@odamea]

Honesty!

[@doll.ov.poetrii4682]

You're right. I see many men saying online now "Well, what about men who want to be stay at home husbands???" when conversations are brought up about housewives. It makes absolute biological sense for the woman to be the prime spouse working in the home and caring for the children. There are even stats on this.

[@user-tn6fg2du6v]

@@doll.ov.poetrii4682 at this point those men should be ignored lol their just lazy. Yes women are suffering from infertility and all sorts of hormonal problems in our 20s/30s . That’s not normal and I believe it’s related to this way of working 🤷🏾‍♀️. We can’t even rest on our periods

[@rtoriq]

I definitely agree for feminine women, but I’ve had to realize there are just some women that…have more testosterone than other women lol. Not trying to be rude, I just don’t relate, and they come off as masculine, but I can tell that they like running around having their nose in everything and making decisions and don’t seem to be phased, physically nor mentally. That’s what made me realize if masculine women don’t have that, they’ll make soft-life-women MISERABLE wherever they are lol. Hell, they’ll make EVERYONE in the “village”miserable unless someone gives them something to feel like they’re in charge of lol. But for the rest of us women who want to revel in our femininity, YES it wreaks havoc on our body mind soul. I have a feeling my menstrual cramps and my sugar cravings will GREATLY lessen if I didn’t have the stressful worklife (including family who feel like work). I’ve gotten the spiritual message for a long while now, but now I need to commit to making it happen.

[@MysticButterfly22]

Chloe, this by far has been one of your most impactful videos to date for women from all walks of life! Thank you so much for this content!🙏🏽 As a soon to be 36 year old black woman, not a single woman in my family including my own mother, expressed the importance of prioritizing "Marriage and Family" above career and education goals. As a teenager and young woman it was beaten into my head to never depend upon a man to supply for your needs and always have your own money. However, to her own theory I watched both my Mother & Aunt divorce their husbands to become quote on quote "Boss Chic"...Career Woman and pay their own way in life. And now as my mother approaches her sixty's (my aunt is already at this age) she is in fact miserable and complains daily about working everyday and how much she yearns for a husband to help take care of her. The hypocrisy is yet so real Chloe!😂 I do have some of my Mother's strong will attitude and ability to take charge in leadership roles. However, I will never be so busy to not to make my man and child a priority above being that "Boss Chic". I have indoctrinated this mentality because of my mother for years. However, as I approach my 40s, I no longer desire to be the biggest boss in the room! I still will be an entrepreneur but I will value a husband and family. Because I will never place myself in either my mother or aunts shoes. Independence and proven yourself at your own expense, should be evaluated carefully.😉❤❤

[@tarawilliams5204]

There is "Nothing Wrong" with prioritizing Marriage & Family>> There is nothing wrong with wanting A Good Man to be married to and living "Happily Ever After" I will not make any statements to be discouraging of your marital goals and desires, but I will suggest that you pay attention to "The Reality of The World" around you!! { Pay attention to the divorce rate, Pay attention to Women in Unhappy marriages & relationships, Pay attention to the rising number of Black Women being killed by their lovers and partners in relationships!! } Just PAY ATTENTION 💯💯

[@TRU3-LOV3]

I love what you said, independence and proving yourself at your own expense, should be evaluated carefully. I think if I truly understood that- I would have had a different career altogether and aimed for sky when it comes to salary. I do think there is something to be said for what a woman's livelihood looks like after divorce or abuse that leads to divorce and how a woman must have her own in this country, if not depending on the government to even meet the basic necessities of life. I think we have found ourselves on the extreme, and I think we are starting to understand the dynamics of marriage and what it takes in our character to prepare for the reality of it

[@yo_its_meeh1]

THIS! I really just left my job because I was tired! I was cleaning, lifting scrubbing taking out trash for way to long, then had the nerve to get a second job. I ended up leaving the first job because I was burnt out. Now I'm doing what I love, with less stress and more time off, and being able to help with the bills while my man pays the majority of the bills. This is so that I stay busy can relax and take care of the house. My mother my whole life told me "Don't worry about no man, worry about your career" I would say What's wrong with wanting to be a wife and mom! she said, " he will leave you and you need your own money". My mom left my dad lol.

[@moonlightgxddess2325]

I’m 25, after a very intense spiritual journey since my teenage years.. I finally had gone to a place where I wanted to “continue to chase my corporate lateral steps. But everything keeps pushing me back to my Divine feminine” and I’m understanding it is due to a higher power and reason .💗

[@GreenwoodCotton]

As a married man for almost 20 years, you call it straight. Much love to you and your platform.

[@Sweetheart0189]

I just turned 28 a few weeks ago. I am working on myself like no other and I PRAY I’m able to get a good husband because women older than me are worn OUT. I cannot let this be me 😢❤ Best of luck ladies!! I’ve never been the CEO boss type. But I also haven’t prioritized the “wife” either. I will come back to this comment to let you guys know what happens ❤

[@stephanienelly90]

Me too! I just turned 28 and I have no desire to hustle. I pray I meet a good provider man because my mom never had to work even though she was a nurse.

[@Kevagoddess]

@@stephanienelly90really was she just a stay home wife .

[@rosiejosie2]

Yes....I'm tired of working.... when I told my younger sister this she was looking at me like I was crazy... but I'm done...

[@lovenosa1105]

Absolutely no lie has been told. This is going to sound radical but as a single women, the number one thing that reclaimed my femininity was no longer financially providing for others. I realized I was groomed to become a provider and once I stepped away from that energy a whole new world opened to me. I am back to the happy, carefree, creative self I was as a teenager. I’ve created balance in my career working from home and am no longer striving climb the corporate ladder of misery. If I were still providing for others I would be more inclined to strive and obsess over my career but I’m not doing that anymore. I like my peace and leisure and spending my money spoiling myself. And what do you know, all those people that were acting as if they would die without my provision have figured it out without my help 😂😂.

[@littlelamb7890]

This doesn’t sound “radical” Truth be told, my therapist told me the exact same thing BEFORE I had a heart attack at the ripe old age of 40!!!! And yes, all of the grown dependents figured it out!

[@goddesst5405]

They always figure it out! 😊 No more hand outs! 🤣

[@lovenosa1105]

@@littlelamb7890 omg!! I’m so sorry it went that far. Hope you are in better health now.

[@leese-anngordon4704]

But what if you're in you're 20's and working day and night to provide for yourself as a single woman..ladies I need advice please I'm stuck in the rabbit hole

[@femininedivin3]

​@leese-anngordon4704 maybe try building some form of passive income stream. It requires you to put in a lot of work at least upfront just make sure it pays dividends as time goes on. Search on youtube based on your specific interests

[@alaerelifestyle]

I'm 27 and have been a full-time artist/author for the last year and a half and when I tell you the decision to leave corporate america actually lost me friends?? But it's been worth it to spend my mornings painting, drinking smoothies, writing, dancing with face masks on loll. It's wonderful that now these kind of moves are more generally accepted bc personal sovereignty is at the forefront of our liberation/happiness- and that means complete agency over our time and creative production. ✨

[@TheNewFeminine]

And I love this for you! thank you for sharing.💄

[@crashingxhearts]

I've already spoken with my SO about the fact that I will be living the soft girl life once we're married and I bear his children. I may do some part time work remotely, but that's it. He's footing the bill so I can be with our children and they receive the best of both parents.

[@NikNik0123]

I wuz never into it. Currently on a career break, a.k.a. Adult Gap Year, a.k.a. "Tired of being strong"‼️😵‍💫

[@afrikurl]

I took a year off too. I called it my sabbatical and I didn’t tell anyone except my best friend. I lived on my savings. I went to the beach to walk a few times a week. I went to the gym. I cooked healthy meals. I gardened. I decluttered my house. I took a lot of time for healing and reflection. I lost 55 pounds during this time. The wonderful thing is that people who I hadn’t seen in a while kept crossing my path. They all would be like you’re glowing. Some folks didn’t even recognize me. Being stress free really ages you in reverse.

[@wendywatkins7366]

A back wider and than Alaska 😂😂😂love your one liners Chloe ❤

[@MissKimLifeStyle]

I have ZERO desire to work hard. I don’t subscribe to the girl boss culture. I’m not trying to break any glass ceilings. My job isn’t that difficult or stressful, and it pays really well. I work to support my interests of shopping, spas, and travel. I’m hoping to move towards a life of leisure and no longer having to work. Stay at home wife me please.

[@TiffanyBTV]

I subscribed to this movement towards the end of my marriage and after my divorce. But i realized i was in a marriage that involved role reversal. Social media also influenced me to work hard , be ambitious, and get the bag. I immediately started therapy in 2017, and realized that was never me naturally, that’s why it failed. I didn’t go back and i haven’t dated a man that required me to go back. My truest self want to nurture my husband And children and I’m now super excited and happy with that . I’m glad more and more women are becoming with being self sufficient without burn out

[@ReversedFeminist]

I started to live smartly by living within my means I downgraded my 900 sqft 1 bedroom apartment that had rent raised 3 times which would have required me to work 2 jobs and run my own brand. I’m now living within my means and investing and saving more money. I have my mornings and work PT while still able to build my brand on the side at my OWN pace. My mental well being health is good because of it. I refuse to girl boss 40 + per week.

[@juanelawson9775]

THANK YOU IT IS SAD I HAD TO GET TO MY RETIREMENT TO FINALLY ENJOY MY SOFT LIFE TOWARD THE END OF MY WORK FIELD I WAS EXTREMELY EXHAUSTED FROM WORKING 47 YEARS THRU TEENAGE YEARS HAD A JOB THRU COLLEGE HAD A JOB AND THRU MARRIAGE AND RAISING MY DAUGHTER. AND TWO DIVORCES .I WISH I HAD LEAST HAD A BREAK WHEN I HAD MY DAUGHTER. NEVER HAD A BREAK AND YES I AM ENJOYING THE SOFT LIFE NOW. AND STILL GET PIUSH BACK FROM PEOPLE. AT 67 YEARS OLD .FROM WOMEN CAN YOU BELEVE THIS?

[@TheNewFeminine]

Of Course I believe it. I’m a living witness. Enjoy your retirement.💄

[@juanelawson9775]

Thank you.

[@sweetpeaj1952]

I don't consider myself the workaholic type, but I like nice things. However, I have yet to meet a guy who is willing to splurge on me without expecting something in return. Many want me to spoil them. So I work for me and for the things I want.

[@SelfishHottieGang]

This! Labor is not something I desire or dream of. I used to feel this huge pressure to overwork myself even going into work sick barely even able to walk even with sick days/PTO. I thought “showing up and showing out” was expected of me b/c I had something to prove. I just don’t have it in me anymore. My life is about freedom, peace of mind, and putting good into the world.

[@thelivingroom6172]

I am totally a girl boss with my feminine balance in tact...im an entrepreneur with the flexibility to do my yoga and relaxation...I dont sacrifice my well-being. My husband plays his role and pampers me but theres no way that im going to trust anyone with my life to the extent where im totally dependent on them like that... I truly believe the issue isnt a woman being a boss...I believe the issue is when women are doing too much to prove that they dont need a man to the extent where they are trying to be a man... many blk women are not requiring anything from men...they are trying to prove that they can be the main provider....idc how much money i make...my man still has tk be the main provider...period

[@ValenciaVixama]

This conversation coming now is so perfect because just the other day my acupuncturist vented (more like ranted) to me about her hypergamous friend and there was so much genuine vitriol and jealousy there it was so uncomfortable. Even moreso because all I could think of is, wow.. is this really how people react when they see me just living a life that makes me happy and isn’t bothering anybody? I am so happy we as a general collective are waking up to the fact that women are not built for a life of back-breaking labor and overextending ourselves for others, and as a result neglecting ourselves. personally, I’m a taurus moon so I have soft girl in my dna makeup 😂 - it was so interesting hearing you read the blurb on what a soft girl is bc I swear you just read a synopsis of my life and the life I would like to keep living. And my last point , I believe the shadow period of the pandemic has made people realize what their priorities are and question who and what they’re really doing all this for. what is all of this worth if your feminine essence is gone and you’re unhappy?

[@incognito3599]

Lol!! Being a boss babe drained me and had me burnt out at 19!! Only 19. Ever since the lockdown 2020, I had a spiritual awakening and at 23 now , I am hypergamous and I am never looking back💃🏽

[@janemu-mx1ec]

Girl YES🎉

[@doll.ov.poetrii4682]

I'm also a child free housewife (we're trying for a baby!☺️) and black women in particular are the only ones who constantly pester me on "when I'm going back to work". I never answer them. I'll go back to work when I feel like it, because I have a choice and my husband honors both choices. I work because I want to, not because I have to. Being a housewife is work, and I take pride in being the keeper of our home, cooking, and have plenty of time to design for my business and to volunteer at local schools and shelters; even if I don't clock in to start my day, we're doing just fine. It's wild that my life irritates people that don't even have to pay for my living! 🤷🏿

[@TheNewFeminine]

Those who can’t will criticize. Sending baby dust your way! Keep negative spirits away from your home, your womb and your marriage.💄

[@doll.ov.poetrii4682]

​@@TheNewFeminineThank you, Love!🤗❤️

[@Tabisam]

My nervous system has never been more stable! Thank you to my MAN!

[@cciv6100]

Yeah. We were sold a bill of goods. I don’t want to toil like an ox under fluorescent lights in an office doing soul-sucking boring tedious work that adds no real value to the world. Pass.

[@kammyr4082]

😂 my girl boss is why i can be soft girl. I don't work extremely hard usually. & i don't shout it from the rooftops.

[@BougieNerd]

I am one of the 2% in the world that has a doctorate and one of the ones that men…not women, but men call a “boss.” I became this not because I wanted to but because I HAD to. I had two little girls to take care of, because their fathers wouldn’t. I wanted them to have “soft lives” before that was even a thing. Now both my daughters are married & in hypergamous marriages due in part to watching me be “Superwoman” and not wanting that for themselves and because I stressed not being in draining relationships. I think it boils down to motivation. Why does a woman do what she does? Me? I did it so my daughters would not have to and it’s not anything I regret. I do wish things would have been different in 20-30s, but now I do have the opportunity to travel, chill, etc. Chloe made a great assessment when she said essentially that feminism is about a woman’s choice whatever that choice may be. I respect and appreciate every woman’s path if that woman can ultimately do the same for me.

[@Old_English]

Living the life of leisure and I love it here.

[@gabrielleclayvon]

For the life of me, I do not understand why a woman would want to be a boss. I want a leisure lifestyle, being led by an alpha male and taken care of by that same man fully, all the while living a life filled with pursuing my passions without any financial burdens on me, so I can be stress free at all times.

[@kammyr4082]

Bc some of have the life you want without needing a man to provide it for us. Being educated & financially free bc I'm a pilot beats waiting on a man to give it to me. While you're still waiting for your desired life, some of us are living it. That's why some of us choose to still girl boss. I travel the world while being paid 6 figures for working 14 days a month. I have 14 days to do nothing if I want.

[@ernasheree01]

Switching to cyclical living has changed my life. It’s only been about six months and my period symptoms have calmed down dramatically, including having far less pain. Honoring my cycle has increased my feminine energy more than anything else. I love it here 🥰

[@mcleanroom7997]

“Back wider than Alaska.”😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@angelika87]

I didn't stop playing barbies until I was 12-13. I was always a soft-tee. nothing can change that.

[@angelika87]

I'm still getting a skill and a decent job but that manager/boss life is not for me. I rather live alone or with family before playing house with a man.

[@KeepTheFaith84]

​@angelika87 Right! I totally agree. I went to a technical/vocational school. Didn't go to school for a long time, I'm not drowning in debt and never wanted to be in a managerial position. No thanks!

[@charlinecharlostin3188]

You spoke to my soul ! As a 26 year old going on 27 I’m ready for a different life and I’m ready to rest. Grind culture and being too ambitious led me to date men who always need help and family members who want to be cared for I’m child free and now I’m changing my life ! ❤

[@marciadixonpr4213]

The most important thing about the 'soft girl life' movement is that it is giving women a choice and taking away the pressure some feel to live out the boss chick/career woman lifestyle. I particularly feel if a woman is married and has children, that additional pressure to be successful at work and/or is too much. They should feel free from that additional stress so they can focus on raising their children and looking after their families - if that's what they want. I think it's great that this channel exists to remind black women there's more to life that working or looking after one's extended family - but rather they should take time out to nurture their femininity and journey to be the woman they would like to be.

[@blessedchild1981]

I use to be in to the Boss Lady thing but now I hate it for the past 3 years. I want feminine ❤ way of life

[@candisecharmaine2913]

People will never stop tearing others down for having the things they told themselves they couldn’t have.

[@KiaFlow]

I've always said that I personally work better with a mate. As a single woman I sucked at adult living. I've never had an issue finding a good man (flaws and all) and I just worked on verbalizing my desires and not compromising. I'm now married and although I'm not a stay at home mom/wife, I have the freedom to do what I want with the money I make (which I end up spending on my family and household) because my husband would completely overlook those details. I've noticed that working hard is expected of black women and it's is utterly ridiculous.

[@mercedesharrison5550]

That sounds a little like 50/50

[@lovelynirvana2960]

I see a lot of backlash coming from businesses like the church or other businesses that are supported by mainly black women. We hold the blk community on our shoulders, including financial. I'm interested to see if this trend continues and becomes a way of life for many of us, how the institutions mainly supported by us will respond.

[@ClaireHaire]

*Narrative must be pushed because, when black women start competing, there is no competition. We are naturally nurturing, we age the best, our naturally feminine physique( when in shape) is the stuff of dreams, intelligence as well is where we really shine. I think of it as a race, why would I tell the fastest runner to start competing, then I would have to actually put in work.*

[@QueendomCome621]

Honestly a lot of women never wanted to be girl bosses. We were forced into it by poor decision making when it comes to relationships and other factors. Im glad the younger women have this type of content and will hopefully make better choices.

[@michelleisme6242]

U know as much as I like the idea how can u be a soft life girl with men that are as a whole not that serious about life in providing and fathering

[@ArmandUnique]

As a teenager I was often felt so much pressure to be “great”! To climb the ladder and be a “boss” and I had no desire to do so and it made me think that I was lazy and unmotivated. I always just wanted to comfortably be able to create and just “be”. Been a stay at home mom/wife for over ten years and its the freedom for me❤

[@Timetrae]

Yep Chloe I’m SO over it!!! Good lord I’m TIED!! I’m working hard to reverse being the man of my dreams!!

[@Timetrae]

Oh and I’m 43 and have been girl bossing it for the past 7 years SMH!!

[@shay-shayhandlestolenbyyt]

I know another woman who's in my generation, 50+. She married and wasn't able to have kids but never worked outside the home. She grew up hard working practically to the point of abuse so i couldn't be happier for her now.

[@MysticalExoticalGoddess]

The life I’ve always wanted to live was that of just having my next mood always being my best move . This left me to being both a people pleasing and a desperate pickme for most of my 20s . But I’m realizing that wanting this want wrong but the way I attacked it was doomed front start . While being smart and independent is empowering I feel like the ability to rest in a state of juiciness and softness makes you an absolute diamond . This culture and age of the boss chick make it virtually impossible to find those who grinded in silence . I wouldn’t say that being feminine is about not working hard but more about giving just as much time energy to your soul /goals/ roles in your life and presenting your best while stationing yourself for the best . Recovery is hard but staying in the same place is harder ❤

[@littlelamb7890]

Not: “You can go argue with your social worker” 😳 😂🤣

[@mjbvd2]

I genuinely hope all younger women listen to your videos and choose peace. I can testify at 48, worked as a mule, raising kids and some men on my own, taking care of my elders: it’s not worth it. It’s just not, I’m on disability now, my body is done and everyone I carried is going his/her own way after I brought them 2/3 where they need to be. Look, my kids, off course. Taking care of parents, fine but till a certain degree bc that knocked me down the worst. But nothing and nobody else is worth it you working yourself into the grave. Get rid of that man munching on your kids snacks while you’re at work. Volunteering to say you’re having a relationship is 2019. Get out of the rat race. Get yourself a good man, one with a stable job, a hobby and an open hand. Be loved, if he doesn’t let him go. No kids without a ring. I repeat, no children without a secure commitment!! And no prenups. Any man that refuses this l, does NOT want the best for you and any children you have together. You’ll never get back what you give. No matter if you have kids or not. You can’t ever be compensated for the role you have as a wife in a household. Make sure you have a man that got your back. So if things go south, you won’t be searching for a one room appt with 3 kids. Being a strong woman is a myth. You are strong by proxy, no need to prove this to anyone, rest in feminine until that strength is REALLY needed. Stay safe ladies 🩷

[@Richbidness]

There’s nothing better than being a stay at home girly ❤

[@Ang_Nicole]

Cheers to the soft life ladies 🥂♥️

[@Misshandyamber]

Soft girl life not fully for me cause I grew up a no limit soldier. But I love seeing other women embrace it.

[@ooreofe_A]

Chloe being saying these for so longgg. She always maintained women's desires change with time. Thank you for showing us the way ahead Chloe 💕💕

[@fortevond]

Hi Chloe, 😍 i’m your listener/student here from the Philippines 🇵🇭, i’m excited and ready for my Feminine school lesson today 🌸🎀💅🏼

[@goddessjyy6789]

I transitioned to a "soft life" when I realized that the way I was going was not aligned with my natural energy and desires. Money isn't where I'd like it to be (the type of soft work I apply for pays significantly less) but I'd rather stay in this lane than get into my masculine.

[@christy3d]

Our culture in general does not support wanting to live a softer life and letting the man go out and work hard or if you say you want a partner that pays all of the bills 100% they see it as an insult feeling the woman needs to hold her own weight too and pay bills too….like we gotta prove OUR worthiness by paying bills AND putting out AND running the household🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️cooking cleaning etc smh

[@Whitney322]

12:25 “… with a back wider than Alaska” the way I hollered!!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@txLALA]

I’ve never been career driven. I chose a position that isn’t too taxing because I’m good at it and enjoy it, and I get to work from home. I’m not aspiring to anything other than retirement at 50. I’ve had friends accuse me of lacking ambition, and I unapologetically agreed.

[@ninawestlake14]

I simply love this. I send my blessings to all the women supporting this lifestyle and all the lucky housewives. God will deal with the haters. Don't waste your feminine energy on them. ❤🎉

[@bythewaterfall8785]

💖💖💖💖

[@nieceylanair65]

Nailed it!!! I'll be 40 in March and experience burnout on a regular basis. I work in a leadership role and my responsibilities are very stressful. Unfortunately, I do not have the luxury of resigning at this time to indulge in the "soft life" permanently. However, I am developing a plan to move into the soft life sooner. I have decided that I will not be working like this until age 65.

[@4eyedqt]

Wish this was longer loved this video 🫶🏽