The Pain of Broken Memories

[@LikeStoriesofOld]

Be sure to also check out my hour-long podcast episode on Aftersun, in which I discuss the film at length with fellow video essayist Thomas Flight kzbin.info/www/bejne/h2ammp-Em92ri7c

[@Sad_Bumper_Sticker]

Subscribed and eager to l-i-s-t-e-n experience longer-deeper Like Stories of Old in the podcast form.

[@lebadass]

Wow. Awesome. Like the avengers of film essay jedi masters

[@alexanderzhukov3773]

Sophie is entering her teens and starts to notice things, but only the bright things of adulthood - partying and kissing and having fun. The darker side of being an adult is hidden from her despite being so close. What devastates me the most is the idea that we might never understand our parents in time, only afterwards.

[@tylerasmith52]

“Life has to be lived forwards, but can only be understood backwards.”

[@fiszu4075]

That's how those relationships work. It realy takes being 30+ and a parent to get it. And your kids and mine will repeat all those steps. Thats a necessary part of human development.

[@brotherbrod]

I feel like that's the case for any relationship, not just that of parent and child. When you sit down and think about it, how much of yourself do you hide from your best friends, your family, your significant other, or whoever is closest to you. I'm of the assumption that everyone hides their deepest and darkest feelings, and it doesn't matter who they're hiding it from, it's just that it's incredibly difficult to talk about subjects like depression with anyone whom you interact with regularly. It almost feels like you're burdening them with your feelings, when that might not be the case. Aftersun is an absolutely beautiful film, and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it since I saw it.

[@muel3628]

this

[@tybrent2841]

I lost my father at 9 to cancer. He was 32 and as I am now 30 and my daughter is now 9 I've been living this. This hit really close to home. It's a struggle to hold back the tears.

[@thedivinemessenger]

why do we hold back…… . . (release)

[@HenningFrick]

I lost my father at 9 to cancer. He was 32 and as I am now 52 and have no kids for...well, personal reasons, I struggled to hold back the tears not only when watching "Aftersun", but also when reading your comment. All the best to you and your daughter

[@Audiostar90]

“I will not say do not weep; for not all tears are an evil” - JRR Tolkien

[@EubulusKane3259]

"Like a lost soul who accidentally survived his own self-destruction" beautifully put

[@harrykeeling2964]

Aftersun is a staggering achievement. As an exploration of parenthood, family, love, depression it's so thoughtful and so quietly incisive it's hard to believe it's the work of a first time director.

[@SidPhoenix2211]

Aftersun easily secured it's place on my personal list of "movies that made me cry like a lil bitch a LOT" lol

[@LuisSierra42]

I didn't cry but it made me really sad once i realized what was happening. Has definitely been in my mind ever since i watched it

[@lulula2017]

I cried non stop. But bitches don’t cry FYI

[@Darrow1996]

This was my absolute favorite film last year, I genuinely wanted Paul Mescal to win best actor for his quiet and more realistic take on depression… the subtleness of his performance is what made it all the more moving EDIT: Wow really appreciative of all the likes everyone! Hoping everyone’s year has been well thus far 😊

[@LuisSierra42]

He was really good as well as his daughter, really great performances and direction

[@Darrow1996]

@@LuisSierra42 And it was her first performance as well! The movie really affected and moved me I loved it! Genuinely wish it had a best picture nom as well…

[@garthbrooks6999]

Paul definitely should’ve won, and Frankie should’ve at least been up for Best Actress too

[@leckard4]

I agree with your mention of a realistic depression. I told people after I saw it that it showed how depression can strike anyone--it doesn't matter if you are young and good looking and seem to have a lot of potential; Paul's character truly couldn't help it, although he tried. The sadness and self-blame he shows when she is describing her own depressed feelings was heartbreaking.

[@jakexdilla]

Mescal’s look of deep sorrow when Sophie remarks “I wish you’d stop doing that… offering to pay for me to do stuff when you obviously don't have the money” was genuinely painful to watch. It’s probably the single saddest two lines in the movie for me.

[@geoffreydesena587]

I haven't cried this much during a LSOO video in a while now. Absolutely beautiful. Thanks, Tom.

[@HeatherHolt]

Made me want to call my dad 😢😊

[@Ralderable]

What a movie! Not to mention the brilliant use of familiar lyrics that take on a wholly new meaning through Sophie's lens - as we experience in tandem, both the lingering uncertainty, and almost instinctual empathy of young Sophie and the loss and mourning of adult Sophie - Sophie who struggles still with the reality of knowing she will never [again] have the chance to look upon the father she never wholly knew (yet loved so dearly). "Why can't we give love one more chance? Cause love's such an old fashioned word, and love dares you to care for her people on the edge of the night, and love dares you to change our way of caring about ourselves."

[@JamezKelly]

What I love about Aftersun is that despite how sad and heartbreaking it can be, it's a somewhat calm and meditative film. Kind of how Sophie is taking time figuring out the past before the last dance occurs and calums tai chi. I've seen it a few times at the local cinema and it's good to relax in it, yet also take time to really understand the characters.

[@jeff2v]

that's a great point because the film take place during a vacation as well, and vacations are mostly associated with taking a break from "normal" stressful life or mental recuperation.. its almost like were vacationing with these characters and also self reflecting with sophie as we watch.

[@discon_csert]

This made me cry. I've never seen this movie but this analysis is moving and I'm going to have to watch it now.

[@SushilKumar-xy5pj]

I'm deeply scared to watch this movie

[@fell9654]

LSOO even made a Spider-Man 3 video essay emotional, very talented

[@LuisSierra42]

@@SushilKumar-xy5pj Don't be, it feels mostly like a slice of life, the dark stuff is only hinted at and for the majority of the time you won't even notice what's really going on

[@kevincgrabb]

10/10 movie

[@MrErhyie]

Yeah as someone else said, its a slice of life movie, the father seems fine throughout, nothing is really strongly hinted, so a lot of this is just speculation and essaying :)

[@nickbooze9766]

It didn't hit me until two days after but I cried and cried. I've always battled what Paul's character had battled.

[@Vicky-ke4es]

This movie is really something else, once I completed the movie I was moved to be sure, but the real rollercoaster starts once the viewer starts searching for answers, I wanted to fill those gaps myself, the more I dived deep the more I felt what Sophie might have felt, then I had to convince myself that it's just a story, and all I can do was interpret and never know the whole truth of what actually happened, just like Sophie had to live the rest of her life, fragmented bits of memory, intense yet never whole..

[@Kieslowski1989]

My favourite of 2022 along with Tár, Banshees and Joyland. I probably have written a lot about Aftersun in my journals that I physically keep. Having a turbulent relationship with my father myself, I could definitely feel the fact that we just consider them as people meant to fulfill their role. To help us sail smoothly. As a teenager, I've always felt myself superior to my father and have vocally expressed it many times to his annoyance. We always consider ourselves as extremely complex human beings having ideas and ideologies the depth of a well. We think that we can read anyone but we don't even come close to understanding our own parents. I'm not shedding tears.

[@Jacob-Vivimord]

This was a great one, Tom. Aftersun made me thoughtful, and I think it's the first time I've cried more after a movie than when I was actually watching it. A wonderful piece of filmmaking.

[@rocktheroadtowembley]

Very good essay, I love your personal perspective on the movie! I think what Callum tells Sophie about his own childhood is very important as well, how he was neglected by his own parents, and how this shaped him as a person in a way. He tries everything to be a good father, but ultimately depression darkens his bright side. For me, the scene where you see that Sophie has her fathers carpet at home - the one he bought in Turkey - was hitting me like a truck. It means that he's no longer alive, and all he left her was the carpet and the VHS tapes.

[@kaidenvi]

"It wasn't about what was on the camera, it was about who was holding it." absolute gem of a line, sir

[@pierrerienier3214]

yes this line and his point about intention, what Calum was choosing to film, were my favourites

[@Enid.fitts13]

I lost my parents at the age of 13, now I am 31 and have a 10-year-old daughter, this movie touched me in a very personal way, as one tries to make sense of what was left of the memory of our parents having known them for such a short time and from the perspective of a child, after going through periods of anger, when you reach adulthood and are almost the same age as they were, you realize that they were just people fighting with their own demons while trying to raise a person and finally you can forgive them

[@sumosimson]

Hey Tom, long time fan here. A few years ago, my dad died and it's been kind of a struggle ever since. Not that my life is going that badly, it's just always hanging over my head. The word I like best is "heimwee" (Dutch for homesickness but I feel it has a slightly different meaning once translated), but it's just always there, memories of a distant past and a desire to go back to it. Whatever it is, several of your videos have provided me with a sort of consolation, or a different perspective that's certainly helped, like the one on Afterlife, or "Why we can't save those we love", and now you've done it again. My favourite youtuber on here and it's honestly not even close.

[@MeerkatChris]

Aftersun immediately shot into my all-time favourite films. I lost my father early in 2022, who I also felt never really wholly knew and had unintentionally pushed away a few years prior (but always looked forward to that big reunion, which ultimately never would come), so this whole film absolutely hit me like a ton of bricks... This lovely essay just reaffirms how beautifully real Aftersun is.

[@techboy2002]

I think you make a great point with Calums potential homosexual struggle. Not so much as it represents why Calum is depressed, but rather how it is adult Sophie trying to attach a tangible reason as to why Calum was struggling so much. Trying her hardest to relate to her Dad as she has now reached his age. That's essentially what the rave sequences are all about: Sophie begging her Dad to just say why he did it. Yearning for an understanding. And the tragedy of it is that Sophie finally pushes him away at the end of the rave sequence. Finally accepting that the exercise is useless, there is no more to learn, just a fading memory and an imaginary realm where he still exists. Sophie has to accept that the childhood image of her Dad was a facade, and she has to let go of it. Moving on herself, with a child and a girlfriend, and to try and not perpetuate the same mistakes her dad made. "This is ourselves."

[@tonybennett4159]

Whether it really happened or was Sophie's imagining, on the night when Calum wanders the streets, after he picks up the cigarette we get a brief glimpse of a lone man on a park bench. Later that night, Sophie spies two men in a door kissing. When she gets back to the hotel, the apartment door is locked and we later learn that Calum is inside asleep lying face down completely naked. I think it was when Calum wakes that we notice a mark by his neck. Sophie would have seen that, so we presume that was real. Is she, in the light of her own sexuality imagining a scenario where one of the issues affecting Calum is his sexuality? Nothing is made specific and we are left to question which events were real and which events are suppositions on the older Sophie's part.

[@bogmon]

With all the references to club cutlture and his ambiguos sexuality I'm wondering if he is alluding to the fact that Calum is HIV Positive?

[@techboy2002]

@@bogmon I think that's resigned to speculation. Just like a majority of the things about Calum in this film lol. Not saying it's a reach I just think it doesn't really add to the film thematically when u keep that possibility in mind.

[@left-handedstan4506]

it could be that, or it could be the realization that's he's the worst dressed 90s gay guy ever.@@bogmon

[@pumitriii6160]

Someone asked me what the rave sequence represents and while I knew subconsciously, I couldn't really find a good way to describe it. I think this is exactly what it represents. Thank you, well put

[@matthewleger5605]

Aftersun was the best movie of 2022 -- staggeringly beautiful and heart-wrenching. watching it feels like being let in, gently, on a profound secret

[@meliskocak515]

this movie was so heart-wrenching to watch as a turkish girl that grew up going off to these calm and still vacations by the shore every summer... They captured the atmosphere of a humble vacation spot back then so perfectly. Turkey has taken a major hit in it's economy and general atmosphere over the past 20 years due to the unfit government that has reigned over two decades. In addition to everything that the movie delivered through its story, it was also so unbarebly nostalgic for me. I was unconsolable, missing what once was... similar to Sophie. I called my dad after finishing this movie, crying my eyes out, really freaked him out. Thank you to Charlotte Wells for not only this beautiful, vulnerable story but also the way she captured the atmosphere then, that's not quite the same anymore

[@brownebear91]

Another great video. This film destroyed me, its been possibly 6 weeks since I saw it and I think about it daily. The weight such a simple film can have shows the quality of the story and direction. Not that it relates so much to my own life and experiences but there's little strands that connect to what goes on in the film to all the experiences of youth and our relationship to our parents. I really haven't experienced a film like it before. Truly felt broken as the credits started to roll at the end. Amazing!

[@vinceinman9666]

Many of the best films build upon revisits, and Aftersun is one of those, doing it quietly and with a deliberate maticulousnes. I already loved it upon first viewing, but each one after has just builds a continuous effort of arresting my soul. It's a difficult watch because of how much it resonance it has with me personally, but strangely cathartic. Awaiting its arrival physically once it ships from A24 so I can wear out the disc.

[@leslieher4600]

I didn't expect to cry this much when I went into this movie. It left me sobbing at the end.

[@Kieran_Rowles]

I saw this tonight at the local, seeing that you were doing an episode for it. It felt like coming out of a dream, in which the dream pulled in memories you yourself had forgotten but you remember the memory and the feeling of that memory. If that even makes sense. I haven't had a film, in such a long time stir my soul like that. I had forgotten that feel. That movie left a print on me.

[@HeatherHolt]

Wow you do look so much like your dad! Your videos always hit me right in the heart, I get chills constantly, I’m always saying to myself, “yes,” and “so true.” You’re so very talented.

[@nicolacorreia6456]

I cried watching this movie, I cried thinking about this movie days later, I cry every time I try to explain this movie to someone, and i'm crying now watching this video. I can't think of another movie that has affected me this deeply. Someone commented at some point "this is the saddest movie i've seen where nothing actually sad happens". It's truly an experience.

[@alancastillo7932]

I was taken aback at the moment when you played the tape of your father and you appeared in the reflection. Besides your careful and thoughtful analisys (as always), the childhood videos make it all the more poigniant and emotional (and it takes bravery to put them on KZbin too). Great job, man! You made me see the film in completely different eyes ❤

[@fletchh]

Aftersun is one of my favourite films, but this video essay made me love it even more! Amazing!

[@glenncho3390]

i consider your essays as short films - works of insight, beauty and art. I have always appreciated your deft hand at selecting sound beds, music, and audio that amplifies and enhances. Truly well done.

[@cinemaspire7258]

What I personally love about Sophie and Callum’s dance towards the end; is the mingling of him at a rave and her older self present, almost doubling as an image of when he may have met her mother. Him dancing with his daughter on holiday may have struck parallels with the night where Sophie was created, while at the same time being a dream of sorts in present day which adult Sophie is having :)

[@durden91tyler]

eternal sunshine of a spotless mind

[@VarnasL]

Real memories are fake in general, ofc

[@adjailsonribeiro6703]

This movie made me cry a lot... And now you made me cry again.

[@__berichh5375]

It’s such a lovely film. Definitely feels like you’re a curious kid trying to understand your parents who are doing their best, also protecting you. It’s so well donr

[@Chris.L.P.]

6:49 oh boy, you made me cry just like the movie! You look just like your father, and the fact that he also had a cast on his arm... My father lives with me since I got divorced, when I was young, we were kinda poor and he had a very small videogame store then later a mini-market, commerce was the only option in our hometown, open-border with Uruguay, and so, life was difficult and I saw my father as an enemy, always angry for no apparent reason at the eyes of a young boy, but at 13 I met my ex wife, at 16 I moved to a city far away to live with her. 3 years later, I invited my father to come to this small town that at least had industries so he could make a better life for himself, and so he did. Then we moved to a bigger town again, all 3 with good jobs and our life completely changed. We visited over 60 cities, nothing fancy, most on my own state, but all scenic or turistic places, we hikes and cycled and camped... We bacame absolute best friends until this day. I lost my wife, but not a day goes by that I feel sad while he's still around, and I try to cherish this as best as I can.

[@DanielPetrov6]

A wonderful essay that almost made me cry! Thank you! During my childhood, practically every summer I also went to Turkey or similar hotels in Egypt or Tunisia with my parents. And it is so fascinating and wonderful that although I am literally from the other side of Europe from you, your experience and feelings about such vacations feel so relatable for me. I even begin to think that such trips are maybe the one of the most unifying for people all across the Europe.

[@josh_richards]

It’s been nearly 5 months since I’ve seen the movie and I think about it most days still. It’s rare for a movie to just crush me the way Aftersun did, it connected so seamlessly with me and made me just sit there and cry multiple times in the aftermath of watching it. I’m scared of watching it again because I’m just going to be a miserable wreck while I’ve got finals this week and this video almost did that. I never thought a movie could top The Florida Project which is my all time favorite movie but this is like right behind it and a second viewing will probably make it leapfrog it…

[@pumitriii6160]

howd the second viewing go? I'm in your exact same predicament lol

[@typicalsnapshot]

Thank you, really. Video essays like these not only give you more to think about a film you admire but also show how 'watching movies' is not just consumption, but can be a deep appreciation that makes you reflect on and change things.

[@kaancal6040]

Incredible video, you converted the feelings we all had into the words and to the video so beautifully.

[@jcdunn2004]

This is a wonderful video about one of my all time favorite films. Both are brilliant. Thank you!

[@bronwynerasmus7390]

This was quite possibly one of the most beautiful explanations & insight of such a (as you stated) tragically beautiful film. Well done. Touched my heart & soul🥹

[@Dickpuffnstuff]

It's a wonderful film and def one of my favorites of 2022. Didn't know much about it when I went to see it and it blew me away. The last shot really got me when it reversed to him 😢. It reminded me what it used to feel like when dropping off my son after my weekend with him, watching the most important thing to you walk away and feeling alone. Movie is a must watch & I believe it will affect everyone differently.

[@Patzorz]

This made me like Aftersun even more, wow. You continue to be the best in the game, Tom.

[@badyearz]

The movie really hurts me and I love it .definitely one of my Top 5 all time. It's like a horror movie that traumatized you that you don't wanna see it again, that's what I feel about this movie but the Under Pressure scene is the scene that I can't forget, it became very personal for me but I don't know.

[@alanvalencia732]

I lived 7 years of my life in another country along with my family. In these years I was pretty much raised by my dad. Life was good and each day felt amazing. He has always been my best friend and he has taught me a lot of things that will always stick with me. We moved back to our home country and I never really had that again. Now I have 2 sisters. He doesn't really see them because of his line of work and I'm sad. I got an amazing childhood but what about them? I try to be there and try to give them that even though it isn't my responsibility but I'm also trying to build up my own life. Each day I understand my dad even more and I see things, bad things that were always there and that he never opened up about. I guess we will never truly understand our loved ones and what they have and will go through.

[@VarnasL]

Videos like this should overflow youtube

[@PYRESATVARANASI]

What a film... As a 90's kid this hit me hard.

[@glassboxdorito]

A deeply, deeply moving film, and a beautifully tender analysis. I lost my father to suicide when I was aged 9, and so much of this film resonated with me. Anyone who has experienced grief will know that there are always unanswerable questions. We may spend our lives searching for answers; Sophie in the crowded club searching for Callum. Looking to the past often provides no answers, and so we must live with the unanswerable-s

[@BigMikeDaGr8]

I love your videos... This one had an unforeseen impact on me, and it made me super emotional. Maybe am just getting to a particular age where i am constantly prone to reflect and ponder, but damn, this one really rocked me in all the ways.

[@Rodprz73]

This is so well timed. I have my daughter visiting from Chicago (I'm a New Yorker) and the older she gets the more I wonder what she takes home with her from our engagement each time. Was it memorable, humdrum, fulfilling, or disappointing? Parents contend with so much between internal and external expectations. It's a wonder how we can ever be "our true selves" around them. On a different note, you should be their MUBI ambassador.

[@johnb528]

This was one of your best videos yet and I have seen many of them. I’ve often had a similar feeling with regards to the new trap of the quick clips. All the videos I have of my family that have been made since the iPhone came out are usually only 30 seconds or less. Just disposable little moments scattered everywhere. They lack purpose and don’t tell any sort of story. Definitely something I am going to try to be more mindful of. Thank you for this.

[@ScottishKoreanCellist]

Thank you for this! I love how you related this back to your own life. The part where you look at your old tapes and see your own father rather than yourself...realising he was just like you. Young and fallible - makes me want to forgive my own father....almost.. ha

[@eli-kn9ni]

Such a touching LSOO video, not to mention how spot on it is. Please make a podcast Tom!

[@LikeStoriesofOld]

Thanks, and I did make a podcast! www.youtube.com/@cinemaofmeaning

[@mcscronson]

As another commenter said - i've never cried more after a movie than I did while watching it. Having lived through depression and reflecting on the fragments of myself from another time, that distant prior life, I feel suddenly filled into a heartbreaking compassion for that man. That man that did not expect to make it here. Thank you for this beautiful essay. I found processing aftersun rather difficult, and immediately I searched your channel in the hope you had covered it. 5 days ago no less, so absolutely perfect timing.

[@pedrovideira725]

I am also from the generation BETA and VHS and Camping ….you spot on, especially on the length of the tapes …that changes everything

[@neetfreek9921]

There’s also research that metabolism effects perception of time. Children on average have higher metabolism and smaller bodies which causes them to experience time slower while absorbing more information. Something like an elephant would experience time faster but in a sort of slideshow fashion. Which is thought to allow them to see growing patterns in grass more easily. And to be fair, kids don’t really see parents as individuals because parents don’t see their kids as individuals. This changes in their teens as they gain more experiences.

[@anujbeatles]

One of the greatest movies of all time. Oscars love would've been nice, and Mescal's nomination was certainly a nod to the power of this film, but this movie will end up living on forever in people's hearts - one person at a time. Decades on people will still be discovering this film and become completely overwhelmed by it in a very rare and personal way. That's in my mind, bigger than any award. :)

[@KT-ki7oo]

The thought of "going away" before my daughter started her early memories often played through my mind during her first year. I love her so much but I realized that sometimes even that isn't enough to make you stay.

[@nineteenfortyeight6762]

So you abandoned your child?

[@dubaiedge]

I'd kill to have any footage of my family. People just didn't generally have video cameras in the 1960s. Father's been gone 42 years now, nearly the rest all dead too. Can't remember how they moved, walked, their voices, smiles, expressions, much of anything at all. It's all a big blank like a black hole, as if that space & time of aliveness never existed, or was a fever dream of mine, & so maybe I'm not even alive, either. Nothing tangible remains but some old coins, a few pieces of jewelry, my father's Boy Scouts ring I can no longer find in boxes I've moved State to State. I barely even have one sample of his handwriting, written on the back of a 1950s photo of his small dog named Pete. I can't even figure out what kind of dog that was.

[@bev9708]

WONDERFUL!!!! Thank you so much!!! It must have been quite moving for you watching this film!!!

[@abandonedmuse]

God I just saw another essay called “Stories That Use Time To Hurt You” and I think seeing both of your essays ripped a hole in my heart. I cried so much thinking about my own mother and realizing she is so old. It hurts. I will post on yours a similar comment I posted on his… because it fits both essays. Time is so fleeting. It always reminds me to go back to that quote from The Office: “I wish there was a way to know you are in the good old days before you’ve actually left them.” Somehow, maybe, it would make time hurt less. So whenever I am reminded of the fickleness of time, I pretend every moment is the good old days. That way I enjoy them all. I don’t remember always, but I remember now more than ever. So I guess it helps in a way. Hugs

[@jamesmmcgill]

They are not long, the weeping and the laughter, Love and desire and hate: I think they have no portion in us after We pass the gate. They are not long, the days of wine and roses: Out of a misty dream Our path emerges for a while, then closes Within a dream. - Vitae Summa Brevis by Ernest Dowson, 1896.

[@scoopy_banoopy]

God, this was such a good video - wonderfully articulated so many of my thoughts, and touched on things I hadn't really thought of either, and really enjoyed the bits about your own life and reflections on documentation as a whole...beautiful ending too

[@Matt_from_Florida]

5:15 If you're not a father then you have no idea how crushing it would be to hear your child say that to you.

[@dannyx498]

I sometimes wonder how brain dead or selfish someone has to be to have children when they're financially or genetically not equipped to provide a real life for them. Compared to the other families and their children

[@bobby8737]

No genetically equipped? What do you mean?

[@s.g.7572]

@@dannyx498 That's an extraordinarily rude thing to say. People lose jobs, lose homes through no fault of their own. People have children, by accident, in places where safe abortions are unavailable. The future is never predictable, and it's not okay to call the victims of that brain-dead or selfish, nor is it okay to imply whatever it is you're implying with that comment about genetics.

[@chicken0w044]

@@dannyx498i sometimes wonder how people with learning disabilities like yourself are permitted to have accounts on the internet

[@pagethreemodel]

​@@bobby8737I think by 'genetically equipped' he's referring to Calum's mental illness. I don't agree I just want to clear things up for you.

[@Liberal3000]

Heart touching video. Really made me feel something deep inside. Thanks

[@hoovervilleofficiel7026]

Aftersun is a Masterpiece ❤

[@pdzombie1906]

Beautiful!!! Reminds me of the very first videos I started watching on your channel!!! Thanx for sharing not only your thoughts, but your memories...

[@joyboyzaki8133]

How to throw a crying party 101 : Even before watching the video

[@candy-misery]

thoughtful! loved the therapeutic feel of the video (and the movie!)

[@JeffreyMcLain]

Thanks for the effort you put into this channel. It means a lot to me. Truly, thank you for your thoughts.

[@imlostjupiter517]

Whoa....I can't even describe how this is impact me

[@JCarrera27]

Among the best last dances in films👩🏼‍🎤🥲

[@nathanieldlewis]

You make fantastic content, Sir. I better understand myself after I spend time digesting your content. Content sounds like such a cheap word for such exemplary work.

[@critiqueofthegothgf]

"lost soul who accidentally survived his own self-destruction". this single sentence represents everything about Calum, I think

[@Eudaimonlife]

Thank you for making me feel alive. I have yet to see the movie but your subtle words move mountains.

[@user-st6ui7oy1p]

What struck me about this film, as someone who lost a parent aged 12, is how alongside the grief, there's a sense of not knowing them or understanding them, and how you can look back at the evidence over and over, but you still don't know what was really going on with them. And you never will.

[@MattA-nz9ze]

I have to say when I first saw Aftersun I loved it, but didn't perhaps connect with it in the way I know many did. This video not only made me cry but now I feel obliged to go and reevaluate my thoughts on it, thanks for a great video! :)

[@leckard4]

What an incredible review. I felt like I took a similar journey as I did watching Aftersun, while watching your review.

[@sewerface]

Glad to have found such a thoughtful reflection on this beautiful film

[@Lancaster22]

Aftersun floored me. I don’t know if it’s the fact I’m a young father that battles demons or if it’s because I was a kid that struggles to relate to his parents but Aftersun is by far the biggest emotional response I’ve had to a modern movie

[@pumitriii6160]

what about older movies? which ones

[@jorgeskuf]

I just watched this movie and bawled my eyes up and you just made me cry again

[@pamdemonia]

A beautiful essay for a beautiful film. Thank you.

[@jehscee]

6:46 made me tear up man. Just yesterday I was looking at old photos of my father in the exact same way

[@captainyossarian388]

I love Paul Mescal here, he's like an every-dad in this movie, at least every loving and kind dad. I also reflect on what my dad was doing at my age and it feels so not real. There's also that feeling that you never really know them, no matter how hard you try. In my dad's last days, I lost track of how many times I told him that I loved him always, that he made such a difference in my life, but it never felt like it was enough.

[@anabelapavio]

beautiful video as always! And you look so much like your Dad!! Luv from Portugal 💕

[@SlapShotRegatta22]

@7:20...wow...spot on my friend. That is some real truth.

[@johnytwotimes4072]

Both my parents are gone and I related so much to this movie I never saw.❤

[@araneus1]

That was touching. Thank you.

[@marialyon6908]

I really enjoyed your reflection of the film. Thank you!

[@GamerRMT]

I know you don't often cover games, but I highly, HIGHLY recommend you cover the PC game Citizen Sleeper. It was a deeply moving experience and fits perfectly into the type of story you like to cover.

[@jon-umber]

What a brilliant video. Cheers

[@nicolebogda1482]

My heart is breaking as my parents are near the end- the pixels do make me think also of being an older adult trying to remember, fill in the gaps- this is so brilliant I can’t comment more

[@capitalt3977]

This is such a great film that I wish had gotten more notice. I enjoyed your exploration of it a lot!

[@pipstrem5401]

What a beautiful movie. Effortless in dealing with the big topics like love, loss, growing up and depression. As soon as the credits rolled, I started crying without warning. A cleansing but devestating film. Much more so, because my interpretation after seeing it for the first time, was that he killed himself. Although there is of course no way of knowing what really happend.

[@Alex-the-Dunster]

Just finished this movie for the first time and i can’t stop crying! I fear this would be my story if i became a father

[@guest_informant]

00:45 It doesn't begin in Turkey? The very first shots are of _video_ from the holiday Turkey. One explanation (I don't know if the video goes into this) is that it begins in Sophie's home as she rewatches video from the holiday. Possibly on her birthday. Maybe even the same birthday as her father on the holiday. Her clinically depressed father struggling. Her clinically depressed father who is now gone. And Sophie mentions that she too may be clinically depressed. And that terrifies him.

[@franug]

Oh man. I'm even older than my parents were when I was 2 years old - which is my daughter's age - and this hits, as the movie hit me. All this thoughts came to mind...is it even possible to fully relate to your parents when you're young, childless, even if you feel like the most empathetic person ever? Is it even possible to be a teenager and not "hate" your parents at some point, even if they are just humans, figuring out parenting as they went, just as anyone of us? Isn't it crazy that kids separate the person from the parent, but we as parents can't? (being a mom is inseperable to everything else I "am", but of course for my daughter I'm just "mom"). I guess Sophie is also thinking all those things as she watches the tapes, trying to understand who her dad really was... This movie is so sad but it has such amazing features as well. Seeing Calum struggling so hard but still remaining a loving dad to Sophie was beautiful. He's trying to be the best he can for her. That's all there is to it, really. PS: I totally agree on being purposeful on taking pictures and videos, especially if one has kids. I'm trying to do the same, and to print photos to make albums. I want real stuff for my daughter to go through just like I can with my parents' records of us.

[@demenok1313]

Damn this analysis is as touching as the movie itself. Some real good advice in it too, i think, about growing up and figuring out yourself. Thanks for that!