The story of a few good men's struggle, against their own commanders, their own fleet, their own ships and their own men. Want to support the channel? - / drachinifel Want to talk about ships? / discord Music - / ncmepicmusic
Пікірлер: 4 300
@Drachinifel5 жыл бұрын
Pinned post for Q&A :)
@biscuit47055 жыл бұрын
what is the process of preserving a ship?
@timothypearson5675 жыл бұрын
possible alternate battle of sushima?
@johngoody72205 жыл бұрын
What could make an aircraft carrier obsolete
@ViktorBezK5 жыл бұрын
What is a transom stern? You mentioned in the HMS Lion(1938) guide that ships fitted with it would gain speed for a given amount of power, if so why weren't most large ships fitted with this feature? Can you please elaborate, this has intrigued me since that episode :/
@SonOfAB_tch2ndClass5 жыл бұрын
Can you calculate longest range the 16 Inch 50 Caliber Mark 7 Guns would be able to penetrate the upper side armor belt of Yamato and Musashi? I’ve heard calculations between 19.5-20km do these seem plausible
@Kletterhase5 жыл бұрын
Who doesn't know it? You want to make yourself a sandwich, you open the fridge and BAM theres like 10 - 15 japanese torpedo boats stuck in the butter. So you shoot several hundred rounds into the fridge just to see that it's actually an old banana
@informitas01174 жыл бұрын
Going to bed and reading a good book you turn over the page and 5 JAPANESE TORPEDO BOATS charging out between the lines.
@ludgerhoutman44644 жыл бұрын
Crewed by Vickers salesmen asking if you want 14.5 inch guns with your sandwich!
@AudieHolland4 жыл бұрын
None of your shots actually hitting the fridge.
@simoneriksson83294 жыл бұрын
Yeah I know... happens to me every morning...
@evanhunt18634 жыл бұрын
@@ludgerhoutman4464 OH GOD THAT'S EVEN WORSE!!
@MSP-km6li5 жыл бұрын
monty python: naval edition
@boxman90335 жыл бұрын
lmao
@rogercushman29035 жыл бұрын
Monty Python's Flying Fleet, Fawlty Fleet, The Benny Hill Fleet.............
@Ozraptor45 жыл бұрын
2000 cigarettes filled with opium = kzbin.info/www/bejne/Z6KsaouJjLaVoac
@HauntedXXXPancake5 жыл бұрын
" Cary on … Sailing for the Tsar "
@trekaddict5 жыл бұрын
That comparison isd surprisingly apt, with Sid James as the Admiral.
@JonathanLundkvist3 жыл бұрын
"Hysterical sailors began yelling that they were all doomed. Correct."
@thegeneral49432 жыл бұрын
"Because there was a fleet of Japanese torpedo boats waiting for them at the narrowest point between Denmark and Sweden. Incorrect."
@PhoenixT702 жыл бұрын
The slightly amused deadpan delivery just does it for me.
@martiansoldier2 жыл бұрын
I love how the most competent sounding ship, the 'Aurora' is also the ship that every one keeps accidently hitting.
@cj-gw5fd Жыл бұрын
Well of course, can't have them making everyone else look worse in comparison.
@ZGryphon Жыл бұрын
It gets even better when you keep in mind that she's the only ship from the Second Pacific Squadron still in existence today.
@anthonybanchero3072 Жыл бұрын
@@ZGryphon I’m surprised the crew didn’t start a Revolution quicker.
@Cba409 Жыл бұрын
Im sure the only reason you think Aurora sounds more "competent" is because its the only name you can pronounce.
@doodmcswood50711 ай бұрын
Or because it was one of the more competently run vessels in this naval shitshow.
@santiago53885 жыл бұрын
The one dislike is from the Kamchatka
@benjaminstout9415 жыл бұрын
They couldn't hit the like button correctly.
@weldonwin5 жыл бұрын
@@benjaminstout941 No, they saw the like button, freaked out, screaming that it was a Japanese torpedo boat squadron, then proceeded to open fire, hitting the dislike button, before crashing into the Aurora
@santiago53885 жыл бұрын
@@weldonwin You sir deserves a medal for that comment.
@Byronic135 жыл бұрын
And then they sunk. No, wait... Just a leaky faucet.
@AudieHolland4 жыл бұрын
In the frozen land of Nador, they were forced to eat the Kamchatka … And there was much rejoicing …
@TheNinjaDC5 жыл бұрын
Odd, I distinctly remember Drachinifel only covered ships and navy battles. I don't know why he's covering a train wreck.
@Shenaldrac5 жыл бұрын
What is a train if not a boat with wheels?
@kamchatka_survivor19595 жыл бұрын
TheNinjaDC , It has the same effect that, we slow down to look at a car crashes. PS I hate autocorrect. 🤗
@misterpants6664 жыл бұрын
Satire is not dead. :o)
@outdatedtank45424 жыл бұрын
@@Shenaldrac oof
@dasUberputer4 жыл бұрын
Best comment ever!
@keaganscott98082 жыл бұрын
I think everyone has it wrong. The Kamchatka was an excellent and extremely useful ship that did invaluable service for the Japanese empire.
@Armored_Muskrat Жыл бұрын
Due to lack of binoculars, nobody noticed the suspiciously Japanese-looking crew.
@Packless1 Жыл бұрын
...their crew should recieve a japanese medal...! 😁
@marcosdillon Жыл бұрын
My head cannon is that the Kamchatka was full of revolutionaries, and that they were fucking up intentionally to accelerate the fall of the Russian Empire. Nothing could possibly change my mind.
@bkjeong4302 Жыл бұрын
@@marcosdillon There were revolutionaries scattered across pretty much the entire squadron, though.
@TheAKgunner Жыл бұрын
@@bkjeong4302 He’s saying that the Kamchatka’s crew, officers included, were all revolutionaries. At least I think he is.
@Seygem2 жыл бұрын
"Your aiming is so shit, I will engage your entire fleet with 4 ships" That has to be the sickest burn in naval history.
@epithet052 Жыл бұрын
Recruit Russian sailor: "haha they are only sending 4 ships" Veteran Russian sailor: "oh shit they are only sending 4 ships"
@looinrims Жыл бұрын
Talk about low standards for insults
@wyvrusgriffion3948 Жыл бұрын
Four is overkill, two would be enough.
@davidlewis5312 Жыл бұрын
From the British whose gunnery would prove in the next ten years to ALSO be a pile of manure
@JunkMan13013 Жыл бұрын
@@looinrims When it comes to Naval insults, saying you'll keep almost all your entire fleet in port so the fight is "sporting" is a pretty sick burn.
@mitchelloates94065 жыл бұрын
"The Kamchatka announced it was sinking, which lead to great rejoicing amongst the fleet". I was laughing so hard it brought tears to my eyes.
@connormclernon265 жыл бұрын
“And there was much rejoicing...yay.”
@stevezielonko13864 жыл бұрын
They were forced to eat Robins minstrels and their was much rejoicing. Monty python and the Holy grail. Still funny although slightly modified
@harrisengr4 жыл бұрын
I laughed so much my eyes watered. Sorry for the men but I still laughed really hard. Was this the comedy channel?
@hawkeye59554 жыл бұрын
@@harrisengr : History Channel meets Comedy Central.
@Feiora4 жыл бұрын
And then it was learned that it was just a leaky pipe. Much Disappointment could be heard, felt and seen...
@thatoneguy83555 жыл бұрын
Random European ship: *Exists* Russian 2nd Pacific fleet: "Is this a Japanese torpedo boat?"
@timulbrich9545 жыл бұрын
Kamchatka: "One?! Its 15, and they are all attacking me and also i drove them off and also i am sinking and on fire and oh wait I am totally fine."
@jamespfp5 жыл бұрын
When in doubt -- SHOOT AND MISS.
@Mrsoldier8475 жыл бұрын
As the Americans say, "Dont worry boys, we're suckering them into molotov range."
@snakes34255 жыл бұрын
@@timulbrich954 Kamchatka (as the Russian fleet trains it's guns on them): uh guys what are you doing (sounds of guns loading) why are you loading the guns (ships open fire with Stormtrooper accuracy) I THOUGHT WE WERE ON THE SAME SIDE
@timulbrich9545 жыл бұрын
@@snakes3425 commence 20 minutes of furious shooting before the ships run out of whatever ammo they had left over after heroically forcing the british fishing trawlers to retreat. No ship is hit, but kamchatka suffers minor splinter damage
@Bustermachine2 жыл бұрын
We owe the communists an apology. We always assumed the vast incompetence and corruption was their fault. It turns out it's just endemic to Russia in general.
@brendonnel6593 Жыл бұрын
Lol
@byron2334 Жыл бұрын
Two things can be true at once. They aren't mutually exclusive.
@barry5767 Жыл бұрын
What do you expect when alcoholism is the national pastime?
@kaminsod40775 ай бұрын
Nah, corruption flourishes in communist countries like mushrooms after rain.
@Noisy_Cricket3 ай бұрын
Indeed. Vietnam and North Korea are clearly more competent than this!
@DerpsWithWolves Жыл бұрын
At first it seemed like Rozhestvensky was a really angry dude. But after hearing what he had to deal with... I understand.
@OhNotThat Жыл бұрын
He started with a temper, he ended with a nervous breakdown.
@bkjeong4302 Жыл бұрын
He eventually died of a heart attack after the war. I suspect this fiasco shortened his lifespan by a decade or two.
@gleisbauer25 Жыл бұрын
I‘m starting to wonder how the good emporer of the US Navy, Admiral King, would have handled the second pacific squadron.
@riograndedosulball248 Жыл бұрын
I sometimes think of him, on that bridge, yelling with every last bit of force, at a far too distant Kamchatka. We've all been there
@TiocfaidhArLa343 ай бұрын
@@riograndedosulball248 throwing his binoculars overboard at it.
@craigjohnson23014 жыл бұрын
Whenever someone asks me if I’m alright I’m gonna answer by saying “Do you see torpedo boats?”
"The addition of a venomous serpent increased the offensive power of the ship considerably."
@ezragoldberg31322 жыл бұрын
I like your Pikachu Profile Picture :) Lightning Bolt! ⚡
@athrowaway34872 жыл бұрын
Especially in any boarding action
@hawkeye59552 жыл бұрын
"Prepare for boarding action! Ready the poisonous snake!"
@GeraltofRivia222 жыл бұрын
@@athrowaway3487 ah yes, the famous battleship boarding actions.
@warmike2 жыл бұрын
maybe because it bit the commander?
@USBearForce2 жыл бұрын
Emperor Meiji: “I must congratulate you admiral, your brilliant torpedo boat tactics have repeatedly thrown the Russian Navy into complete disarray!” Admiral Togo: “It’s not me, Your Majesty. I’m not the one doing this.”
@vladraduandrei5227 Жыл бұрын
what torpedo boat tactics ?
@chaselegoman Жыл бұрын
@@vladraduandrei5227 It's a joke about the Russian sailors thinking random fishing boats are Japanese torpedo boats (despite being nowhere near Japan).
@welshlout3400 Жыл бұрын
Emperor Meiji: "Ah, then it must be the Kage Bōto no Jutsu I instructed the Imperial Ninja Force to develop for me! They perfected it at last!" Multiple voices from the shadows: "That wasn't us either..."
@DiegoMartinez-lu1vs Жыл бұрын
@@welshlout3400 Emperor Meji: then who ? Admiral Togo: the Russians themselves, they thought that our torpedo boats were in the Baltic. Emperor Meiji: Your joking right... right ?
@connorgerein9791 Жыл бұрын
Alternatively “Thank you your Majesty, I’ll inform the fishermen of the world right away
@jiyuhong5853 Жыл бұрын
Russians: So let me guess this right, you just decided to shoot up fishing Boats, BRITISH, fishing boats? Admiral: ... Da Russians: But you halted fire and helped rescue the survivors? Admiral: Net! We ran away! Russians: Where were you running to? Admiral: Suez Russians: The same Suez controlled by the British. Admiral: Da. Russians: Via British controlled Gibraltar? Admiral: Da Russians: So you were running away from the British by running to the British? What part of this plan did you think about?
@MyVanir6 ай бұрын
What is this thing called "thinking"?
@thecrazyloner5 жыл бұрын
Zinovy Rozhestvensky: things can't possibly get any worse. Narrator:"and then things got worse"
@vandeheyeric4 жыл бұрын
Narrator: “And then the Kamchatka sent a message.”
@Philip2718284 жыл бұрын
33:10 "The flagship was now also overrun by chameleons which proved understandably hard to find..." *sound of uncontrolled giggling*
@dougauzene83894 жыл бұрын
LOL..."Karma Chameleons," lndeed! ;-)
@stanislavkostarnov21574 жыл бұрын
sadly, not really overrun... not truly overrun sadly, if the Chameleons actually had any wish to run those ships they might have done a better job! they did not, and paid for it with their lives....
@snakes34253 жыл бұрын
Admiral Rozhestvensky in the mean time had to be physically restrained to prevent him from manning a gun and shooting up the fleet
@chrislovell53833 жыл бұрын
I love his KZbin videos as I'm a huge Military History Buff but this was a new level of entertainment. Brilliant, funny, factual.
@AirShark952 жыл бұрын
We need this to be turned into a miniseries and directed in a style like "The Death of Stalin". Dry, dark humor with good cinematography and a very clever direction and acting. Edit: suck it, u/greyfawkes0
@paulgibbon5991 Жыл бұрын
I was thinking a sitcom, complete with laugh track. I mean, the protagonist is one half Basil Fawlty and one half Edmund Blackadder.
@Colt45hatchback Жыл бұрын
Too bad john cleese is too old now. Would have been perfect.
@Kaiserboo1871 Жыл бұрын
I’m thinking a dark comedy. It needs to end with the disastrous defeat at Tsushima.
@alexandermackie7621 Жыл бұрын
@@Kaiserboo1871 Ah, like Blackadder going over the top?
@Kaiserboo1871 Жыл бұрын
@@alexandermackie7621 All I’m saying is that it needs to be a 2 parter. The first part is about the journey, and the second part needs to be about the Battle of Tsushima and it’s aftermath.
@happycentury4288 Жыл бұрын
Im so glad that the voyage of the 2nd pacific squadron was this well documented, this is a masterpiece historical comedy. It even comes with a recurring joke, the kamchatka
@Juggler4071 Жыл бұрын
I haven't seen the video of the battle itself, but it also continues in the same comic vein. Having previously mistaken pretty much every object they came across for a Japanese ship, as they approached the Tsashima strait they finally came across Japanese ships in the fog... and mistook them for Russians. The Russian hospital ship actually signalled the Japanese to look out for the other Russian ships in the area, which rather removed the element of surprise.
@larsrons79378 ай бұрын
The composition of the fleet: For what reason did they bring an *ice breaker* for for this voyage? I could be wrong but I don't think there is that much ice at the equator.
@grumbeard4 ай бұрын
@@larsrons7937 This one actually makes sense. Vladivostok, the possible destination of the fleet and the area around it is not ice free all year round. Depending on how long the campaign was going to last they would have been rightly effd if they couldn't get into the harbor becouse of not being able to make a path.
@larsrons79374 ай бұрын
@@grumbeard To be honest you are absolute right, I had the same thought myself. But the chance for a joke was too obvious, a ball right at my foot, I just had to shoot it. 😄 And if not for Vladivostok itself it would have been useful further up north, based at Vladivostok.
@merafirewing6591Ай бұрын
@@larsrons7937 I think that icebreaker wanted to go on a tropical vacation.
@SomethingLegit13 жыл бұрын
"You are without doubt the worst fleet I've ever heard of." Baltic Fleet: "But you have heard of me."
@emjackson2289 Жыл бұрын
I sail the ocean blue, I'm a saucy thing of beauty! I'm the Baltic Fleet to you, but the 2nd Pacific Squadron on duty!
@thanquolrattenherz9665 Жыл бұрын
till this day they wait for a japanese captain to say "this is the best fleet i have ever seen"
@djs164 Жыл бұрын
Black Sea Fleet: "Hold my beer."
@Boppinabe Жыл бұрын
"We are the worst fleet you've ever heard of SO FAR."
@hawkeye5955 Жыл бұрын
@@djs164 : Vodka
@snakes34255 жыл бұрын
(After Tsushima) Admiral Rozhestvensky: Admiral Togo you're gunnery was appalling Togo: why? Admiral Rozhestvensky: I'm still alive
@bkjeong43025 жыл бұрын
snakes3425 Lmao
@jinhunterslay16383 жыл бұрын
Togo actually met with the poor Russian admiral after the battle
@justinebautista13833 жыл бұрын
@@jinhunterslay1638 I feel bad for him man. He was a good commander but had an pathetic fleet
@jinhunterslay16383 жыл бұрын
@@justinebautista1383 not sure about "good"...I'm sure he's average at best
@edlenorgaeron80033 жыл бұрын
@Sparky Puddins By that time, no one was competent enough to carry out the punishment.
@Atsah10 ай бұрын
Admiral Beresford pitting 4 battleships against the entire 2nd pacific squadron and describing it as “chivalrous” is honestly one of the best diplomatic insults I’ve ever heard. He must have genuinely pitied Rozhezvensky, a LOT.
@manz78609 ай бұрын
Cheeky ass brits
@Juanito_Peligroso3 жыл бұрын
Let me take a side bar to note that THIS particular Russian officer was NOT corrupt. Thank you your honor.
@seanbigay104224 күн бұрын
The good news is that Zinovi Roshestventsky seems to have been incorrupt, competent, and conscientious. The bad news? Wht do you think he was so angry all the time?
@useodyseeorbitchute94505 жыл бұрын
"Given to furious fits of temper" - After watching whole video I'm not sure whether that's really description of his personality or simply natural reaction of any person trying to do his job.
@kempodle46655 жыл бұрын
Standardowy Login both
@rudolfschrenk94115 жыл бұрын
You have to understand that the russian navy was in the same kind of state throughout his career. He needed this temper to achieve at least something.
@bkjeong43025 жыл бұрын
Rudolf Schrenk The original Pacific Squadron was a good deal more competent.
@rudolfschrenk94115 жыл бұрын
@@bkjeong4302 , yes. for two reasons: It was a long distance away from St. Petersburg and its corruption, and Admiral Makarow.
@Grimmwoldds5 жыл бұрын
@@rudolfschrenk9411 "The Japanese have mined the seas!" "Which seas?" "ALL THE SEAS!" vein throbbing intensifies
@andro78625 жыл бұрын
Throwing binoculars and screaming at the sea is a natural reaction to commanding such a abysmal fleet.
@dougauzene83894 жыл бұрын
LOL...HOLY BAUSCH & LOMB, BATMAN! ;-)
@fredsas123 жыл бұрын
Only thing worse is realising that that said binoculars was the last one on the ship because of lack of supplies..
@BlackStar21613 жыл бұрын
Given the circumstances, he acted with comendable restraint. I would've ordered all of the commanding officers of the Kamchatka shot.
@avikemarruters7172 жыл бұрын
@@BlackStar2161 But the firing squads would have missed!
@fuzzydunlop79282 жыл бұрын
Hell, that’s just how I spend my Monday nights - looking through the binos at the rest of the week to come.
@gusbuckingham66632 жыл бұрын
My grandfather was a WW2 Sailor. Started a cabin boy and retired a harbor pilot. I'm not going to say where or the name of the ship incase the former US Navy captain is looking at this trying to feel better by seeing the Kamchatka. His is s very short and sad tale indeed. So my grandfather boarded a WW2 destroyer to bring her in to port. This was in the late 60s/early 70s. He took command and that is where the captain got the idea he was smarter them THE GUY PAID TO PILOT SHIPS IN.... He questioned everything my grandfather said, voicing it in front of the men on the bridge. He kept it up for a good 20 minutes. The guy was by what I was told "an idiot". When approaching the pier the captain said they were going in at the wrong angle. My grandfather was very annoyed by now and told the guy that he knew the harbor, tides and reminded him that he was a pilot after all. The captain began to give orders countermanding my grandfather's orders. It went something like this: Grandfather: I'm commanding this ship. I know the harbor. Captain: No. G: Are you going to take the com? C: Yes. G: OK. All of you (to the men on the bridge) are witness. The captain has refused to let me comand and has taken control of this ship. C: (Series of orders that made no sense going against an ebb tide that was very swift) G: You're going to hit the pier. C: I am not. G: I assure you that you are. C: I'm in comand... G: (Braces himself against the bulkhead as did anyone not directly involved with this mess.) C: Oh.... And with that the destroyer hit the pier. Starboard side going about 100 feet against it; terrible metal tearing sound. This was followed by more orders that took her away from the pier to come around and take another try. G: Do you relinquish or keep comand? C: (gulp) ... relinquish. My grandfather said this idoit,"Shouldn't comand a floating dock". But still, STILL, not as crummy as the skipper of the Kamchatka. If you made it this far thanks for reading.
@loganlove998611 ай бұрын
That poor soul . . . Im SURE he can learn a lesson or 2 on what (not) to do from Kamchatka 🥳🥳
@The_ZeroLine10 ай бұрын
lol a classic tale
@Rutherford_Inchworm_III8 ай бұрын
Story, bro.
@larsrons79378 ай бұрын
I love that story. But at some point I spit my coffee out all over my computer screen from laughing. Now I have to clean it. Thanks for sharing the story.
@trevorday79235 ай бұрын
Bless him, a true seaman and an example of patience for us all. The captain didn't happen to have... a strong Russian accent, by any chance....?
@ZGryphon9 ай бұрын
Thanks to his description here, I can only picture Admiral Rozhestvensky being played by Captain Archibald Haddock from the _Tintin_ comics, screaming random nouns at his subordinates through his megaphone in transports of fury. "Visigoths! Bashi-bazouks! Triangulators! Anacoluthons!"
@TomFynn8 ай бұрын
Troglodytes! Iconoclasts!
@startrekker45964 жыл бұрын
Aurora before leaving the Baltic: “Oh boy! I can’t wait to sail to battle and fight for Tsar and Empire!” Aurora after returning to the Baltic: “the Empire cannot be saved and should be exterminated”
@tomhsia43544 жыл бұрын
Which is approximately what actually happened.
@joselorenzomendoza55344 жыл бұрын
More like: i serve the SOVIET UNION
@josephdedrick93374 жыл бұрын
@@joselorenzomendoza5534 more like...shudder...never again to the east.
@stanislavkostarnov21574 жыл бұрын
@@josephdedrick9337 meanwhile... SS.Kamchatka (in her new incarnation) fires on a non-existent Ukrainian cruiser in the Barents Sea (or was it in the Kara sea, anyway, somewhere near Nizhni-Muhzhdansk) damaging a helicopter platform in the process...
@alexanderchristopher62373 жыл бұрын
Can’t really blamed them. After all the hell they’ve been through with the empire in this expedition, probably no surprise that they would actually mutinied.
@bificommander4 жыл бұрын
I propose a diving expedition to the Russian flagship. The objective is to recover the admiral's case of glasses, and see how many of the 50 were left at the time of sinking.
@warrenlehmkuhleii84724 жыл бұрын
bificommander We will not find it, he threw the box, after he ran out.
@sawyerawr57834 жыл бұрын
@@warrenlehmkuhleii8472 and wouldn't you know it, there was a bunch of gear on the bridge missing too. we think he unbolted this stuff and threw it when he ran out of bincoulars
@speed150mph4 жыл бұрын
On-board the flagship at the battle of Tsushima.... Bridge officer “sir, our lookouts report they can’t make out the targets” Admiral “how can they not see the ships, the others have no trouble spotting them!” Bridge officer “yes sir, but they have the benefit of binoculars to scan the horizon with” Admiral “where are our binoculars!!” Bridge officer “leaving a breadcrumb trail all the way back to Russia on the sea floor!”
@sirboomsalot49024 жыл бұрын
Have they actually found any of the ships sunk at at Tsushima
@speed150mph4 жыл бұрын
Daylen Hilty your talking about the Japanese province?
@trevorday79237 ай бұрын
"...Admiral Togo, who had been watching the Russian fleet all along..." I just get this picture in my head like this was a movie. It starts with a man in Japanese naval uniform walking past the camera, then stopping, turning around and peering into the camera as if he's all of a sudden seen something interesting. He waves to someone out of frame, beckons them closer and points at the screen in a "you don't BELIEVE this..." kind of way. Then every time something goes wrong for the Russians we'd get another short clip of an increasing number of Japanese naval officers, absolutely glued to the screen in rapt attention, and occasionally a hand comes up from below the frame as one of them slowly eats popcorn...... (We HAVE to make this movie....)
@TomFynn4 ай бұрын
The reactions of the IJn officers during the movie must be: "We get to fight more Russians? Banzai!" "We get to fight these Russians? Banzai, I guess?" "We had to fight *these* Russians? Poor bastards."
@starwarzchik1122 жыл бұрын
Meanwhile, in the modern day, Russia’s only aircraft carrier, the _Admiral Kuznetsov,_ sank a dry dock it was moored at, needs a tugboat escort in case it breaks down, and leaves a trail of smoke so long it can be seen from space. Some things never change!
@RamdomView2 жыл бұрын
It gets better: the reason for the tug boat and smoke? The Soviet Union, and later Russia, never bothered to build the port infrastructure to support the ship, meaning the ship's engines are always being run.
@kvltizt Жыл бұрын
Russia’s military is materially large but the material itself is mostly junk.
@elbolainas4174 Жыл бұрын
I once read that thw Russian naval doctrine dismisses carriers bc they're too large amd expensive to be useful and they're giant targets for way cheaper anti ship missiles, hence the Russian navy commissioned so few. Given the actual performance of the Russian military and its rotten core revealed in the recent months I'm quite sure that argument was nothing but another maskirovka.
@notoriousblt1038 Жыл бұрын
And now the Moskva has been sunk by an enemy with no navy
@joebombero1 Жыл бұрын
China had a helicopter carrier catch fire while in dock. Apparently the walls had been insulated with flammable insulation instead of the expensive fireproof insulation so the contractor could pocket the savings. A welder ignited the insulation and the ship quickly burned out of control for three days.
@SerPinkKnight3 жыл бұрын
Oh God, the mental image of this grand Russia admiral, commander of a whole fleet just standing on deck and SCREAMING at his ships because they are so shit, even though they are too far away to hear him is just hilarious
@ShahjahanMasood3 жыл бұрын
I'm dying XDDD
@SephirothRyu3 жыл бұрын
"What do you MEAN we have run out of binoculars?!"
@Christopher-N3 жыл бұрын
If Basil Fawlty, instead of being a hotel proprietor, was a Russian Admiral. :P
@jamuraisack55033 жыл бұрын
At one point, he had the Kamchatka stay nearby in order to better berate them.
@SephirothRyu3 жыл бұрын
@@jamuraisack5503 But what if... he had made Kamchatka ITSELF his flagship?
@Beowulf_DW5 жыл бұрын
I lost it at the bit about the parrot. Just imagine that thing flying around reciting every Russian curse under the sun.
@weldonwin5 жыл бұрын
"Caw, caw *BLYAT!* "
@moritamikamikara38794 жыл бұрын
"Debil blyat pizdec." "Ummm... excuse me?" "DAVAI AMBAL NI POHUI!!!"
@bkjeong43024 жыл бұрын
@Jim Man Parrots can actually learn (through context) what words mean.
@kickassssnation0272 жыл бұрын
Maybe the parrot understood what The Admiral was feeling.
@azmodanpc2 жыл бұрын
The bit about the British wanting to go against the entire second fleet with only 4 ships is a sick burn if there ever was one.
@shark1802 жыл бұрын
I can imagine the crew of the Kamchatka seeing a sea gull and going, "Holy hell its a torpedo boat! OPEN FIRE!"
@mistertagnan8 ай бұрын
**Seagull lands on the Kamchatka’s deck** “My god, we’re being boarded by the Japanese!!!”
@connormclernon265 жыл бұрын
I feel so sorry for Admiral Rozhestvensky. It shouldn't be called herding cats, it should be called holding the 2nd Pacific Squadron together. Especially considering how it all ended and him defending all his Captains even though they surely pissed him off to no end.
@michalsoukup10213 жыл бұрын
He should have blamed Kamchatka, after reviewing the ship logs any board of inquiry would have to side with him.
@halojump1233 жыл бұрын
BOO!!!!
@RichWoods232 жыл бұрын
The Moscow State Circus does actually have a cat trainer. His dozen or so cats do all sorts of little stunts and tricks, but require constant bribery with food. The performance the cats put on was to my mind a little bit hit and miss -- so on average more successful than the 2nd Pacific Fleet!
@Cooli1672 жыл бұрын
@@RichWoods23 So you're saying actually herding cats is easier than coordinating that damned fleet?
4 жыл бұрын
- Be on fishing boat in North Sea. - Fishing - Suddenly you hear a faint sound - You look to the horizon - Lots of battleships - They are getting closer - Sound grows louder - Recognize sound - It's Yakety Sax blasting at full volume - Ships starts firing - "Oh no, it's the Russian 2nd Pacific Squadron" - Tell my boatsmen not to worry - It will be over soon - 2 hours later - No physical harm to us despite multiple shots at us - "The hell was that about?" - "Huh? What?" - Has gone deaf from Yakety Sax - We later fish up a pair of crushed binoculars. Must be related
@luket10854 жыл бұрын
Dogger bank incident
@DarialKuznetsova3 жыл бұрын
THIS ONE KILLED ME! I CAN'T! XD *keels over laughing*
@Nick-rs5if3 жыл бұрын
Underrated comment.
@RichWoods232 жыл бұрын
"No physical harm to us" -- The Russians did manage to sink one trawler and kill two fishermen, but they promptly scored an own goal by killing a priest and a Russian sailor, turning an away win into a draw.
@Knightwolf19942 жыл бұрын
If anyone who makes those "song plays but y happens" videos is seeing this, please make this a real thing.
@elgenerico6263 Жыл бұрын
It's been 117 years and Russian navy is *exactly* like this.
@MrViki6010 ай бұрын
Orkish navy
@americankid77829 ай бұрын
I would argue that the modern navy is worse off because of the modern technology requirements in a ship and the side effects of 1990 with the corruption that ensued.
@alexandermackie76218 ай бұрын
Orcish navy, the orkish navy is at least joyous@@MrViki60
@roetheboat16 ай бұрын
@@americankid7782 Despite every single shortcoming that the 2nd Pacific Squadron had, Rozhestvensky was STILL somehow able to drag the coal-powered fleet across the world. The modern Russian navy wouldn't be able to do the same, at least not without tugboats to be able to tow the warships.
@cedricliggins75285 ай бұрын
Remember the Moskva
@KeluMocy2 жыл бұрын
The spirit of the 2nd Pacific Squadron lives on. Russians claim the flagship of their Black Sea fleet caught fire and sank on its own, because they think this story is less embarrassing than losing it to enemy action from a country that doesn't even posses any fleet.
@pierreblaise94332 жыл бұрын
Not to mention the only Russian aircraft carrier who managed to sink in his own drydock
@bthsr71132 жыл бұрын
Also the Kursk Submarine whose loss could be considered black comedy.
@paulgibbon5991 Жыл бұрын
It's a good thing they learned their lesson about ill-maintained hardware, poorly disciplined troops who don't want to be there, poor morale, incompetent leadership who got their position for toadying rather than competence, rampant corruption and incompetent diplomacy that seems determined to piss off every neutral party in the world.....right?
@dragonstormdipro1013 Жыл бұрын
Both sides of the Russo- Ukraine conflict are complete dumbasses
@jeremyheintz1479 Жыл бұрын
A country that is armed and has been trained by NATO for nearly 10 years*
@vincentzhi95554 жыл бұрын
kamchatka: misses every single shot kamchatka: fires a salute, and the single salute hit the aurora *what*
@CrossBorderNerds4 жыл бұрын
The target is the safest place to be.
@bkjeong43023 жыл бұрын
This is actually exaggerated (though not by much); Kamchatka DID use a live shell for a salute and fire it at the Aurora, but it was a very near miss rather than a hit.
@Colt45hatchback3 жыл бұрын
I was hoping the crew was having a laugh, oi Joe, wouldn't it be funny if we shot at aurora? Yeah haha bang
@CorsetGrace3 жыл бұрын
I laughed out loud at that one.
@jamesyap83643 жыл бұрын
@@Colt45hatchback *shell hits Aurora Crew of Kamchatka: oh blyat.
@tomdixon72645 жыл бұрын
And the Japanese victory at Tsushima strait is no longer a mystery. It was more of a mercy killing.
@georgesoros64154 жыл бұрын
Indeed.
@joehayes99334 жыл бұрын
To be fair, another hour or two of fog and the fleet which wouldn't have been caught and made it.
@battleship2174 жыл бұрын
@@joehayes9933 and then hit a rock and sink
@joehayes99334 жыл бұрын
@Jack the Gestapo that's actually what happened. Like Force Z in 1941, the Russians were literally caught by fog dropping off an hour before safety. Also, the Japanese weren't too good in the war, in fact had the original commander not had his head blown off I'd say the Japanese would've probably lost as mine warfare took its toll
@Rammstein0963.4 жыл бұрын
Actually a Russian hospital ship gave away the fleet's position accidentally I hear.
@j.f.fisher53182 жыл бұрын
Russian claims that the Moskva lit itself on fire reminded me that it's been awhile since I watched this video.
@Elenrai Жыл бұрын
Now that you mention it, that makes actual sense, it was not a ukranian action, it was russian naval traditions!
@pittypatterputzzler5311 Жыл бұрын
Think it was a guy that vaped /s
@CaptainColdyron222 Жыл бұрын
16:51 In The Hunt For Red October novel there is an Alfa class submarine named for E.S. Politovsky. Of course, being named for a member of the Second Pacific Squadron, her luck is atrocious. On her maiden voyage she collides with a whale and is nearly lost. She later suffers a catastrophic reactor accident and sinks.
@trekker105 Жыл бұрын
I ha e to wonder if that was intentional
@trekker105 Жыл бұрын
I ha e to wonder if that was intentional
@Packless1 Жыл бұрын
...forshadowing...! 😁😱
@spirz4557 Жыл бұрын
@@trekker105 Given the boat's incident record... 1st incident takes place during her sea trials : rams a whale, impact crushes ten square meters of the bow, destroys the sonar, jams a torpedo tube, almost drowns the torpedo compartment and damags almost all systems onboard. Politovsky only survives because of Ramius' skills. The repairs take one year. In the meantime, two additional Alfas have been commissioned. 2nd incident : High pressure turbine malfunctions and the ship must return to port just two days after careening. Two more undetailed minor incidents of various gravity take place in the meantime, giving Politovky a permanent reputation of cursed ship. 5th and final incident : Politovsky, after four days of full regime, has a reactor accident and makes an emergency surface. One sailor falls on a control panel, cutting the power onboard. With no control, she sinks. Only one man survives the disaster : a cook who is washed overboard before he can lock the escape trunk in the open position. The survivors slowly suffocate to death. The worst part is that there is a US sub, USS Pogy, which assists to the scene and immediately sounds the alarm, but the rescuers aren't fast enough. Oh, and the cook later escape burning to death when a clueless KGB agent is about to light a smoke in a hospital in an oxygen room. Clancy probably based Politovsky's backstory on the real life Alfa K-64 which suffered a catastrophic reactor accident and was deemed a total loss and/or the Hotel-class K-19 which was nicknamed "Hiroshima" by her crew and suffered numerous accidents and breakdowns.
@RobotsEverywhereVideosАй бұрын
And then it got worse
@sirmanmcdude5084 жыл бұрын
Ship: *Exists* 2nd Pacific: "TORPEDO BOAT!" Ship: *Doesn't exist* 2nd Pacific: "We're under attack! Throw the iguana!"
@invadegreece92813 жыл бұрын
The hell
@thomaspowell74683 жыл бұрын
Throw the Iguana made my day at 2 in the morning
@hawkeye59553 жыл бұрын
"Load the poisonous snake in the main batteries!"
@CharChar21212 жыл бұрын
So anyway, I started blasting.
@Udontsay9482 жыл бұрын
Iguana: Assemble the Rat Corp!
@thewaraboo28244 жыл бұрын
The Aurora: "A shining example of Naval conduct and discipline." Also the Aurora: *[Mutinies and literally overthrows an entire government]*
@alexgottlieb12864 жыл бұрын
The Waraboo oh yes, one shot - 70 years of destruction!
@bkjeong43024 жыл бұрын
Wouldn’t you mutiny in that situation?
@alexgottlieb12864 жыл бұрын
Bk Jeong Aurora mutined in 1917, not in 1905.
@Masterchiefkf34 жыл бұрын
ALEX GOTTLIEB after this shitshow, and a good 12 years of royal Russian bullshit, who wouldn’t mutiny?
@stanthology4 жыл бұрын
kzbin.info/www/bejne/oKPMhYJ8Z5WZisU
@TomFynn2 жыл бұрын
I'm amazed the Russian Fleet had any ammo left when battle began and hadn't spent all of it on torpedo boats. The battle of Tsushima should be called "the Putting a Fleet out of its Misery of Tsuhima"
@vikkimcdonough6153 Жыл бұрын
I feel Admiral Rozhestvensky's pain. It is somewhat of a wonder that the Second Pacific Squadron actually made it to Tsushima (relatively) intact.
@izumishion62673 жыл бұрын
Rozhestvensky (to the fleet): How? How do you mistake fishing boats for Japanese torpedo boats!? Fleet: "We're sorry. It wont happen again." *Kamchatka arrives* Rozhestvensky: "And where in Mother Russia's bosom have you been?" Kamchatka: "Sorry for my lateness. Got lost. But you'll be pleased to hear that I fired 300 of my shells at some Japanese torpedo boats." Rozhestvensky: "You wasted 300 shells on Japanese torpedo boats?" Kamchatka: "Yes but I scared them off. Strange though, They flew Swedish, German, and French flags." Rozhestvensky: *left eye begins to twitch. Proceeds to walk to the nearest bathroom and shout incoherently.*
@RamdomView2 жыл бұрын
In fairness, the fleet was told that Japanese torpedo boats could be easily disguised as fishing boats.
@podemosurss83162 жыл бұрын
Rozhetsvenky: Bring forth the crate of binoculars!
@andrewryan44172 жыл бұрын
@@RamdomView That doesn't explain how torpedo boats were waiting for them in Western Europe. Other than these peasant sailors literally had no idea where Japan was and how long the trip was going to be.
@RamdomView2 жыл бұрын
@@andrewryan4417 To elaborate, the fleet received a report from a transport stating that "four torpedo-boats which only showed lights on the mizenmast-head, so that at a distance they might be taken for fishing boats." That combined with the facts that torpedo boats were hard to detect, that Britain was allied to Japan and that Britain built much of Japan's fleet.
@lurkingcarrier87362 жыл бұрын
@@RamdomView So... what, the assumption was that there would have been an entire flotilla of British-built Japanese-designed torpedo boats being hosted in British ports but operated by forward-deployed Japanese crew?
@maxkennedy80754 жыл бұрын
Who would win? A fleet of mighty Russian warships vs 0 Japanese torpedo boats
@zachsmith16764 жыл бұрын
hands down the imaginary IJN Torpedo Boats
@keithbrown76854 жыл бұрын
this'll be the first time I've ever voted for 0.
@joeye17724 жыл бұрын
Did you mean: “a fleet of mighty Russian warships vs the same fleet of mighty Russian warships”? 😂
@justjohnny4204 жыл бұрын
Fishing ships had better accuracy without ever firing a shot
@Colt45hatchback3 жыл бұрын
I think the sea
@vinnynj78 Жыл бұрын
I really have to commend the crew of the Kamchatka in their tireless efforts to be even worse than the fleet with which they were sailing. A monumental task for sure.
@1987palerider2 жыл бұрын
I'd love to see a movie about this, but no one would ever believe it actually happened
@XenoZbornak Жыл бұрын
Open the film with a text: what you are about to watch is the true story of the 2nd Pacific squadron. While some creative liberties have been taken we believe that this movie accurately captures the reality of the brave men on board these 45 ships.
@jamesroad316 Жыл бұрын
@@XenoZbornak and the anguish of the admiral of the fleet
@anthonykelly53524 жыл бұрын
You should pitch this as a movie, a two parter, the voyage there, then the battle, if you included Russian, British and Japanese actors, directors and producers, it could be bigger than Ben Hur, proving truth is a better story line than fiction, because no one would have believed this actually happened. The box of binoculars alone would be worth the admission to watch him throwing them in 3D.
@bkjeong43024 жыл бұрын
Awesome idea.
@chooseyouhandle4 жыл бұрын
would the movie be a drama or a comedy?
@Angel99323 жыл бұрын
@@chooseyouhandle Yes
@steventhompson3993 жыл бұрын
This is a great movie waiting to happen, comedy during voyage then tragedy at battle vs Togo
@Squiglypig3 жыл бұрын
@@chooseyouhandle I think a dark comedy along the lines of "The Death of Stalin". It could absolutely work.
@dalik19975 жыл бұрын
Name more iconic duo: Kamchatka + torpedo boats with operational range of 18000 km , capable of 300 knots
@s.31.l505 жыл бұрын
Dalimil Rozprým They are no boats, they are transonic Torpedo bombers
@LostBeaver5 жыл бұрын
Kms Bismarck and being overhyped to the moon and back
@bkjeong43025 жыл бұрын
Post-Dreadnought battleships and failing to do anything to justify their costs. (Yes, I said it)
@LordOceanus5 жыл бұрын
And fitted with cloaking devices. One has to wonder if they were fighting Kingons instead of the Japanese
@barrylucas5055 жыл бұрын
Don't forget the fact that they are invisible
@matthewmoser12842 жыл бұрын
Captain of the Aurora: "Target the Kamchatka!" But sir! That's our own ship! "If ANYONE has the right to sink that miserable tub, it should be US!"
@m.streicher82867 ай бұрын
The chaplan being the among the first casualties is so poetic. Vayage of the damned indeed.
@Alex-cw3rz5 жыл бұрын
I can't express how sorry I feel for Zinovy Rozhestvensky
@redram51505 жыл бұрын
Symptomatic of a larger, more terminal issue
@nmccw32455 жыл бұрын
No kidding. What a shit show.
@virusguy56115 жыл бұрын
Seconded. I thought he was incompetent... until I watched this. Poor bastard's IQ must have been dropped by 50 points due to all the madness.
@LordOceanus5 жыл бұрын
I'm genuinely shocked he didn't have a stroke or start executing the offending officers
@jonskowitz5 жыл бұрын
I can certainly understand why his temperament was what it was if what he experienced on this voyage is any indication of what he faced day-to-day in the Tsar's navy.
@DrThunder884 жыл бұрын
William D Porter: We are the worst warship in history. Kamchatka: Hold my vodka. *Kamchatka drops the bottle while handing it to Porter* *Porter sinks anyway*
@MikeJones-qn1gz3 жыл бұрын
I mean atleast nobody was killed when porter was abandoned
@NashmanNash3 жыл бұрын
Don´t forget the Mogami..5 Torpedoes,4 sunken ships..all japanese transports
@bkjeong43023 жыл бұрын
@@NashmanNash Neither William D. Porter nor Mogami were as bad as Kamchatka. They only had one significant fuckup (most of the Porter's mishaps were fabricated in 1997, with only the torpedo incident and her sinking being legitimate, and the latter wasn't a case of incompetence).
@arya31ful3 жыл бұрын
@Sparky Puddins She should've won a medal for that.
@marxel44443 жыл бұрын
Ah! The infamouse Willy D!
@ericmarley70602 жыл бұрын
The Kamchatka is it's own character. God knows what they did when they got lost in that second storm. and how many "Japanese" vessels (read: neutral vessels) they destroyed. They fired 300 rounds in that time alone.
@thoralexander93872 жыл бұрын
Given her gunnery and general incompetence, I can safely tell you that she most assuredly did not sink anything.
@underworldguardian704 Жыл бұрын
@@thoralexander9387 Ironically, that was her saving grace!
@mistertagnan8 ай бұрын
“Do you guys hear that?” ~Ship that the Kamchatka has desperately been trying to kill for the past 30 minutes
@georgez83503 ай бұрын
"Are these torpedoboats in the room with us right now?"
@jinhunterslay16383 жыл бұрын
Fun Fact: Admiral Togo actually visited Rozhestvensky after the Battle when Rozhestvensky was being treated at a Japanese hospital, and he offered the following words: “ Defeat is a common fate of a soldier. There is nothing to be ashamed of in it. The great point is whether we have performed our duty.” Togo probably didn’t realize his words would mean more to Rozhestvensky than he intended because he had no idea what the poor guy has been through...
@mackbolan82 жыл бұрын
So true
@GeraltofRivia22 Жыл бұрын
Amazing how quickly the attitude of a culture can shift, considering how the Japanese felt about soldiers on the losing side during WW2.
@jinhunterslay1638 Жыл бұрын
@@GeraltofRivia22 TLDR, the reason Japan is so different during WW2 is because the underwent a minor coup d'etat where nationalist extremists took over all the big positions.
@Japcsali Жыл бұрын
@@jinhunterslay1638 there was always a massive difference between army and navy mentality
@hawkeye5955 Жыл бұрын
@@Japcsali: The Japanese army and navy practically hated each other during WWII. At one point, the navy refused to provide fire support to army troops.
@mikea23635 жыл бұрын
Legend says that some of the few Japanese casualties were caused by a flying snake
@chemech5 жыл бұрын
As opposed to the majority being due to uncontrolled laughter...
@Alystas5 жыл бұрын
Another legend say that most of the casualties from japanese side came from mass suicide, the japanese sailors being so humiliated that such a batch of buffoons have been sent to fight against them.
@bkjeong43025 жыл бұрын
Alystas That’s an insult to buffoons.
@barleysixseventwo66654 жыл бұрын
After the battle the Japanese hospital ships were inundated with wounded sailers; mostly bruised jaws from when they hit the floor upon seeing the operational...”capabilities” of the Russians.
@Nonamearisto4 жыл бұрын
I think some Japanese almost got bitten by a drugged-up Russian-speaking crocodile from Africa.
@alexv33572 жыл бұрын
"The Kamchatka announced it was sinking, which lead to great rejoicing amongst the fleet" They were forced to eat Robin's minstrels. And there was much rejoicing
@candle869 ай бұрын
Anyone come back every few months just to laugh at the Kamchatka, or just me?
@tangerinechris44925 ай бұрын
Let's not forget about the attempt to create the world's largest floating collection of predatory animals as well. And a parrot that lives to learn Russian curses fron an Admiral.
@hawkeye59553 ай бұрын
Also the firepower supplemented by poisonous snake.
@alexhm652 ай бұрын
I turn to this one whenever I need comic relief
@sergarlantyrell78475 жыл бұрын
I love that the Royal Navy planned to go to war with the entire Russian 2nd Pacific fleet using only 4 ships... ... And they probably would have won!
@sergarlantyrell78475 жыл бұрын
@Brett Mitchell Veterans of what? I don't remember many naval battles in the Boer war, and it was 50 years since the Crimean war so none of the officers or sailors would have still been in service from then.
@joehayes99334 жыл бұрын
@Magni56 Beresford: I had to be sporting man! Fisher: No! We need every ship for the Germans! Beresford (muttering): A pair of torpedo boats could've handled them.
@kamchatka_survivor19594 жыл бұрын
Ser Garlan Tyrell The Royal Navy should have trolled the 2nd Squadron with torpedo boats. 😈
@joehayes99334 жыл бұрын
@@kamchatka_survivor1959 Then again, the Russians would've probably panicked and fired everything the minute the torpedo boats showed up. Granted they'd probably sink the Aurora instead but it would be hilariois
@jameshope79334 жыл бұрын
Wasn't it the 100 Anniversary of Trafalgar that year?so yeah,4 British battleships is more than enough.every man in the Royal Navy would have been willing to attack ina rowboat and board them if necessary.
@blueeyeswhitedragon98395 жыл бұрын
If history had been taught in school as presented here, we would all be historians, and fools would never be elected to high places.
@deltavee24 жыл бұрын
Right. I hereby nominate Drachinifel for President of the Planet.
@walterbrown86944 жыл бұрын
The narration could not be more perfect - British humor carefully enclosing hilarious sarcasm !
@dougauzene83894 жыл бұрын
INDEED...HERE, HERE! & HARRUMPH!
@cjclark20023 жыл бұрын
I second this, aggressively.
@ohhahhglennmcgrath42022 жыл бұрын
Moskva sunk you say? Must've been one of those pesky Japanese torpedo boats.
@bufatutuagonistes88762 жыл бұрын
Or the rats. Sort of amazing watching this and seeing the Russian military in Ukraine suffering from many of the same maladies: Corruption by connected suppliers, corruption by captains, corruption and laziness by other connected officers. Poor discipline and completely lack of training. Leader giving direction without thinking it through. And resulting death and destruction. Isn't "The Leader" wonderful, whether a Czar, Stalin or the low stinker currently occupying Russia's highest office.
@Dimapur2 жыл бұрын
Yeah heard it was being distracted by TB2! Oh the irony!!
@j.f.fisher5318 Жыл бұрын
lol
@coreyandnathanielchartier37497 ай бұрын
Remember, it was this battle that emboldened the Japanese Navy to believe they could defeat the US Navy, Royal Navy, Royal Australian Navy, and RNZ Navy all at once. They made a pretty good go of it for a while.
@bkjeong43027 ай бұрын
Given that Tsushima wasn’t much of an achievement, it’s a miracle the WWII-era IJN did as well as it did.
@cosmoflanker5 жыл бұрын
I have three comments: 1) It's like a Greek Tragedy, as only the Russians could do it. 2) Surely the "Battle of Dogger Bank" deserves its own video. 3) Damn those Japanese ninja torpedo boats, you never know where they'll pop up!
@anonymusum5 жыл бұрын
Your com finished me off .... lmao
@teodor99755 жыл бұрын
4) do you see torpedo boats?
@teodor99754 жыл бұрын
@Golden Eagle phantom or sand going?
@teodor99754 жыл бұрын
@Golden Eagle these fancy technologies... Witchcraft
@jackmack10614 жыл бұрын
I love number one.+1
@theirnkamchatka36384 жыл бұрын
This was such a fun road trip with all of my friends. I do not appreciate you making fun of my spotting of torpedo boats though. They were actually there! I swear!
@justjohnny4204 жыл бұрын
I believe that you believe you saw them. :)
@ShahjahanMasood3 жыл бұрын
Oh god; its the Kamchatka! We are all doomed! 《Runs away》
@loneneotank.56873 жыл бұрын
*confused screaming*
@syariffadilah29492 жыл бұрын
Kamchatka stop hitting Avrora !
@LuizAlexPhoenix2 жыл бұрын
Fuck it, I declare war on you! Prepare your remaining shells! Now, being your target instead of ally I am assured to survive.
@spamviking2 жыл бұрын
Tonight on Top Gear 2nd Pacific Fleet: Richard sees some fishermen, James smokes some funny cigarettes, And I throw some binoculars!
@lkrnpk2 жыл бұрын
Russia: ''Of course we will fuck up at logistics, that's a given.''
@windwalker57654 жыл бұрын
Kamchatka: "We've sighted enemy torpedo boats!" Me: "What the hell is Jingles doing on a Russian cruiser?"
@Masterchiefkf34 жыл бұрын
John Evans jingles May be crap, but I don’t think he’s that crap.
@benbaselet20263 жыл бұрын
@@Masterchiefkf3 Apparently you know nothing of this legendary oaf.
@garynew96373 жыл бұрын
The tanks on fire.
@hawkeye59553 жыл бұрын
Jingles picked a Russian cruiser but it was actually the repair ship Kamchatka.
@117steveng2 жыл бұрын
I can see jingles doing that . The salt mines would be working overtime on that day
@jona.scholt43625 жыл бұрын
(Naked Man) "Do you fear death?"
@Feiora4 жыл бұрын
*Draws pistol and shoots the naked man*
@deltavee24 жыл бұрын
Ecktually he was only half-naked. The question is which half of him was naked? Mind if he was covered in coal dust, one probably couldn't tell.
@Feiora4 жыл бұрын
@@deltavee2 *puts afew more bullets in just to be sure* ...
@TK421004 жыл бұрын
*Throws binoculars as well*
@christophpoll7844 жыл бұрын
I wonder if he used some squid arms to form a beard before asking this....
@Efraim_713 ай бұрын
Kamtchaka: if you ever think you are doing shit in life, then this ship pops up and you feel better
@TomFynn3 ай бұрын
"I kamtchatkaed" should replace "I fucked up".
@robs.26712 жыл бұрын
Moskva sunk, she'll give the Kamchatka some company in hell
@virusguy56115 жыл бұрын
Oh my god. When you list the ships, it is like watching a heist team introduction... Except they’re all crap
@jonskowitz5 жыл бұрын
National Lampoon's Oceans 11
@christophpoll7844 жыл бұрын
Every Team needs a mascot.... but what to do with a team that only consists of mascots...!?!?
@crhu3193 жыл бұрын
Great names. Lousy officers.
@Aubury5 жыл бұрын
I winced at the irony, grimaced at the satire, and laughed at the folly, the human condition at sea, in war. The Tsar having read a telegram, telling of the defeat of the second Pacific squadron, put it in his pocket, and continued his game of tennis..
@gallusdomesticuskfptechpriest2 жыл бұрын
For some reason, I need to watch this again...
@bradenhagen79778 ай бұрын
"Man that's a lot of warning shots" -France, Netherlands, Germany, Japan, Great Britian,
@synthdriver88174 жыл бұрын
I love how this period of Russia's "Navy" history is like one big joke; except it's not a joke. This actually happened.
@robertfousch27033 жыл бұрын
Not according to Wargaming.
@tumppu19753 жыл бұрын
@@robertfousch2703 Any downvotes on this video are probably from wargaming employees or their biggest fanbois.
@Ironhold_Watch3 жыл бұрын
Why do they think it didn't happen ?0.o
@synthdriver88173 жыл бұрын
@@Ironhold_Watch Russia wanting to pretend it's better than it really is probably. Propaganda so the masses dont realize how shit things are.
@LeviForWaifu3 жыл бұрын
Comberth Ballstomp replayed
@briancox27215 жыл бұрын
Let's be honest, how close do you think the good admiral was to dropping a lit match into the coal dust and calling it a lifetime?
@Bird_Dog004 жыл бұрын
Not sure. I guess that would have dependet on the availability of vodka.
@stanthology4 жыл бұрын
Nicely expressed. I will try to use that before I kick the bucket!
@stephenm.stouter22384 жыл бұрын
Bird_Dog I certainly would’ve turned to the bottle
@redeyedwithanger58664 жыл бұрын
well he got it by heartattack wonder if he was mid beat down on a dumbass
@SynchroScore2 жыл бұрын
"As they prepared to depart the sweltering seas of Madagascar, the Kamchatka reported that she was sinking...and there was much rejoicing." "Yay..."
@paulgibbon5991 Жыл бұрын
With a lot of other war stories, I'd say they deserve to be made into a movie. This deserves to be made into a sitcom.
@professionallyclueless23954 жыл бұрын
Good thing they sent the icebreaker in case the Japanese unleashed their dreaded tropical sea ice
@bkjeong43024 жыл бұрын
Professionally Clueless Lmao!
@ramjb3 жыл бұрын
The icebreaker was there for the passage of the Baltic, and was actually needed for that transit. Given that at the latitudes where the fleet base was (next to St Petersburg, in Kronstahdt) ice is a serious threat to navigation for most of the year. Drach makes a fun point of how she was sent back, but she'd been sent back after the fleet made it out of the Baltic and into the North Sea anyway, as her services would've not been needed anymore.
@owlsayssouth3 жыл бұрын
Unless they needed to get into Vladivostok at the end of their journey. Assuming no help from ships there.
@michaelray40333 жыл бұрын
Hey, that stuffs deadly! I seen it take out a whole Elbobian war fleet!
@kussh1003 жыл бұрын
The icebreaker crew and captain did not WANT to go on the trip. It was their way of shirking work. They should all have been shot as this was total insubordination.
@murderouskitten25775 жыл бұрын
I usually listen to your videos in car while driving somewhere ( phone via bluetooth to car stereo ) . For first time in my life i actually had to pull over , and watch the video at the resting place , coz i was laughthing so dam hard , i could not drive safely . I was laughthing so hard it hurts now , even half a hour later :) Thanks for making this day so bright :)
@virusguy56115 жыл бұрын
I'm at work right now and i'm hoping my coworkers don't give me weird looks for how much i'm cackling.
@roylu65805 жыл бұрын
I almost spat water all over my room while watching this and choked trying not to
@virusguy56115 жыл бұрын
@@roylu6580 For me it was 8:35 where the battleship sank that made me giggle... then it was the "NINJA JAPANESE TORPEDO BOATS" that made me howl in laughter.. and then I got broken by Kamchatka.
@whee385 жыл бұрын
The first time I watched this video I laughed so hard I pissed my self. Only watch this video on an empty blatter
@alainarchambault23315 жыл бұрын
Really? Not even a chuckle from me. Guess I expect humans to be so stupid that I'm not taken by surprise.
@james873676 ай бұрын
When he described his officers as 'manure sacks.' I lost it. 😂
@andorwid18802 жыл бұрын
This was so unexpectedly hilarious that i actually laughed out so loud that my roommate decided to check on me. We proceeded to laugh together
@josh6565 жыл бұрын
"Ready the boarding party, unravel the poisonous snake!!"
@Questknight124 жыл бұрын
"PREPARE TO REPEL BOARDERS! FIRE THE SNAKE!"
@theatagamer904 жыл бұрын
"Release the various carnivores!"
@sawyerawr57834 жыл бұрын
I'm not sure how I haven't seen this comment before but now I can't stop laughing and my father is looking at me like I'm insane. I love it! Also I'm now imagining some kind of cartoon-esque scene where the gun crews ram the snake into the gun, ram the powder charge, then fire it so that its body is wiggling rapidly from side to side as the head basically steers like a homing rocket toward Togo on the bridge of the Mikasa. where it then impacts throwing him back off the bridge and over the side.
@hawkeye59554 жыл бұрын
"Ready the poisonous 🐍!"
@clumsycommissar52604 жыл бұрын
The ssssucsssesss of thisss missssion dependsss on how I use thissss cardboa- er... wrong snake
@yansuki42405 жыл бұрын
im dying, forget emu war. this one take the crown for ulitmate war meme.
@KatherineFtw4 жыл бұрын
Nobody remembers the time Japan treated to arm the emus with torpedo boats? :p
@Volnas973 жыл бұрын
Everyone is talking about Emu war, but China once declared war on Sparrows with around 1 000 000 dead and there is still some aftermath (e.g. very few bees, and insecticides everywhere)
@yansuki42403 жыл бұрын
@@Volnas97 that one is nasty, the chinese got bitten hard back by locust and cause devastating famine. thanks mao.
@SephirothRyu3 жыл бұрын
The reason why a few of the sailors went insane: Gir was aboard their ship. And he sang the Doom Song. THE ENTIRE VOYAGE. Ok, fine. He occasionally spent a day singing Its A Small World continuously instead.
@ahmadshasha36323 жыл бұрын
Me too...hahahaha
@crhu3193 жыл бұрын
20:00 memorializes this insane debacle "versus" the trawlers. The impact on diplomacy was obviously extremely negative. The Kamchatka nearly started several wars on its own lol.
@bkjeong43022 жыл бұрын
Imagine if that started WWI a decade early, only it's everyone kicking Russia around.
@oldcrackadated4 ай бұрын
A movie of this circus would be the highest grossing ever, a comedy for all time
@giovannifavullo70655 жыл бұрын
"don't trust anybody, not even yourself" -2nd Pacific Suadron
@anngo41404 жыл бұрын
"trust, but verify"
@l79864 жыл бұрын
The Kamchatka seems like what would happen if 4chan was ever in charge of a ship
@kommandantbaker3 жыл бұрын
Sounds about right
@georgew20143 жыл бұрын
😂👍
@_BirdOfGoodOmen3 жыл бұрын
No lie it sounded just like a game of Space Station 13
@tomservo92543 жыл бұрын
4chan managed to locate a solitary flagpole within 24 hours by triangulating airplane traffic patterns and coordinated artillery targets against ISIS by cross-analyzing social media posts. They're like a vassal swarm in Europa Universalis, good luck getting them coordinated on a focused target but if they are they'll steamroll whatever's put in front of them.
@StabbySabby3 жыл бұрын
Tom Servo don't forget the airstrikes!
@Christopher-N3 жыл бұрын
If it wasn't for the lost of the needlessly panicked crews and victims of this endeavor, this was an absolutely hilarious story. If there was one shining light (not pointed at noncombatants or entirely nonexistent vessels), some of the animals that had been taken aboard might have a go at the rats, if they could catch them.
@darrellsmith4204 Жыл бұрын
Revisited this gem today, it's just as fantastic as it was 3 years ago..
@HMN134 Жыл бұрын
And more relevant than ever
@christopherr.21375 жыл бұрын
“And this being a Russian fleet the phrase “Then Things Got Worse” “ I actually laughed out loud and am still chuckling about that line well played Sir well played indeed
@gregorydicovitsky32915 жыл бұрын
You have outdone yourself here. Amazing facts, expertly told!
@thekinginyellow17444 жыл бұрын
If you study the history of Russia, you begin to understand why "And then things got worse" is kind of a Russian proverb.
@alexandermarinin70364 жыл бұрын
Russian proverb is "It never happened, but then again..."
@michalsoukup10214 жыл бұрын
"The story of a few good men's struggle, against their own commanders, their own fleet, their own ships and their own men. And Kamchatka, Above all against Kamchatka"
@colmmacN2 жыл бұрын
How has this not been made into a black comedy like The Death of Stalin? This is gold!