The Scary Reality Of Sex Education In Alabama | State Of Grace | Refinery29

[@refinery29]

How do you feel this issue should be resolved? Share your opinions with us below!

[@icebear4839]

May I just say Refinery29, thank you for sharing light on this topic because its so important to share light on Sex Education. Because it is so necessary to have it, especially in schools so thank you. 👏❤️✨

[@Sahar-style]

Thanks for highlighting this subject. Living in Washington I wasn't aware that sex Ed was not common in all states. My girl just had it in school this year and I think it was the most dreaded subject to talk about in school. Yet it raised the discussion at home and gave me the opportunity to elaborate more on safe sex. I like how the info was scientific at the most and I'm glad my daughter is more fortunate than I ever was as a 10 year old.

[@laceyunderwood02]

In Baldwin County which is down near the Gulf Coast we have health classes and we talk about sex education. I personally don't agree with the abortion law and I'm ashamed to be apart of this state because they are "treating the symptom not the problem."

[@ellenaivanovych4916]

How about getting educated by themselves online, I can't believe that the whole young people there haven't access to the internet. If they want to know anything about something ,they can find out researching about that.

[@anamercado7975]

I feel like the bigger issue at hand is violation of Separation of Church and State because many of the states with no sex ed curriculums are heavily influenced by religion to continue to not have comprehensive sex ed. It is very clearly reflected by those states with teen pregnancy rates, STI rate, and HIV exposure.

[@milkteamachine]

The fact that only 13 states require sex ed to be *medically accurate* absolutely blows my mind and is actually terrifying.

[@Eyeriz2014]

Ikr! I'm wondering what bullshit is being taught in other states that do not have to be "medically accurate". Poor kids, glad I got good Sex Ed in VT.

[@saammmy7]

Yeah that one shocked me the most. Every subject taught should be scientifically accurate. You can't just teach kids some random bullshit.

[@tobyconn2045]

Isn't that the parent's fault, not the state's?

[@zariaeda007]

@@tobyconn2045 I still don't understand why parents want schools to teach sex education instead of doing it themselves. We live in a society where you could literally find thousands of websites to get information from yet no one can be bothered talk to their own children.

[@celinak5062]

Yeah, move/migrate to those states

[@emiilyemiily5536]

"You can't not educate people on something, not talk about something, and then effectively punish them for the silence that you implemented." 👏👏👏

[@refinery29]

+emiilyemiily PREACH!

[@elizabethburke3861]

There's a quote that mirrors this well from Sir Thomas Moore, 16th c.: "For if you suffer your people to be ill-educated, and their manners to be corrupted from their infancy, and then punish them for those crimes to which their first education disposed them, what else is to be concluded from this, but that you first make thieves and then punish them." I guess we still have not figured it out.

[@oofoof7707]

I kinda dont get this phrase could you explain please

[@JabberJelly]

@@oofoof7707 Children are not being taught about sex in schools or at home, then as adults they still dont know much about safe sex practices and how STDs are transmitted or what they even are. The government then swoops in and makes it hard to access birth control and tries to ban people from getting an abortion.

[@melodyhaviland9393]

👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

[@morehoneymustardplease807]

"if you get pregnant, you aren't allowed to get an abortion. But I refuse to teach you about sex, or how to be safe about it. Your welcome."

[@Katie-mw7pd]

Don’t forget the part about being charged with murder if you happen to have the traumatic and uncontrollable experience of a miscarriage.

[@juliahcornell]

That's because according to them, you're evil if you have any sex at all, ever, until marriage, and pregnancy is your punishment if you do. Education and abortion both let the woman get out of her punishment.

[@dickiewongtk]

How about just don't have sex. 100% will not get pregnant.

[@sammierose1150]

Wong Tik Ki how about just don’t eat. 100% chance of zero food poisoning 🤷🏽‍♀️ same exact comparison dude. Sex is a biological need regardless of whatever bullsh*t your religion is telling you.

[@markv.brooks3035]

@@sammierose1150 it's scientifically proven that sex is only for making babies. not for meaningless pleasure. if you don't wan't kids don't have sex. why is it so hard?

[@justintran5053]

and alabama has literally one of the highest rates of teen pregnancy in the us according to the cdc. shows how well abstinence forward teaching is.

[@rynfornow3411]

This needs to be at the top!!!

[@camillefaith2005]

Justin Tran THANK YOU!

[@rowancarabba6253]

That's less because of teaching abstinence and more because we are no longer a culture with Judeo-Christian morals. Premarital sex is thought of as okay, so people are going to do it whether or not they are taught abstinence.

[@princy4010]

Rowan Carabba that’s the point. Abstinence only sex education will not work because people will have sex anyway. If they’re not teaching anything other than abstinence then teen pregnancy rises. This isn’t because of a culture that no longer has judeo-Christian morals it’s because of a culture that is so close-minded they will teach abstinence only sex education that doesn’t work, then have one of the highest rates of teen pregnancy and then also have the strictest abortion bans.

[@bloodcottoncandy]

It's been that way before the statistics were made. History has teen pregnancy written recorded everywhere where women's and educational rights are exploited. Even with religions.

[@laetitiasales3527]

The last woman is literally the stereotype of Southern women. Pro life. Pro abstinence. Bleached blonde hair.

[@dorothymitchell8475]

This is a true stereotype, but I can say I'm on the opposite spectrum for all of this characteristics and I am just as 'southern'

[@kekepalmer3904]

😂

[@darthslayder6904]

I’m pro life because I don’t believe in harming the child just because of how shitty their father is. I do believe that not teaching sex Ed and shaming people for being gay is awful.

[@darcybhaiwala7057]

I'm pro life. I don't even eat meat. I believe in public healthcare, improved foster care, gun control, environmental protection, and am against the death penalty. That lady was pro-birth, not pro-life.

[@Orinatl]

k a l e how about because of someone like me who is tokophobic (phobia of pregnancy and childbirth) but has protein s deficiency (blood clotting) and can’t take birth control or plan b. I waited until I was 25 to have sex because it scared me so much. But not having sex isn’t a way to carry on a relationship. Am I supposed to be alone the rest of my life if a condom brakes a some point? Is my body just for rent if that happens. I may seem like an oddity in this conversation. But I actually have a couple friends who of similar feelings situations. Let me explain that I am self harming-ly tokophobic. Just talking about it has made sweat break out across my body and goosebump raise up my arms...i mean this when I say I would have been one of the women with a close hanger if there were not safer way. It’s just my body. And that not one of the things I will allow it to do. Because it’s mine. I don’t judge other women on there choices. Pregnancy is beautiful for them like some people who make a life out of skydiving. Or work with with spiders. And Babies are beautiful. I love children. I would happily adopt children who have been born and have no where else because of pro-life women. Child birth, though, is just not for me. And I will of course end over never to accidentally fall pregnant. Obviously, I’m sure you’ve caught that from what I’ve been saying. Have extremely safe sex. But I will be fertile for another 15 years if I don’t get my tubes cut (which is very unhealthy for women) and accidents happen.

[@sarupi641]

It is so difficult to believe USA is a developed country when you hear things like this.

[@chlonanu]

yea before i went to the US i didn't even think the poverty was as bad as developing nations i've been to. America kinda disgusts me in a lot of ways

[@OphiuchiChannel]

Poverty in the Us is one of the most awful worldwide because all the riches are passing by the homeless with contempt or delusion.

[@whatever5922]

Thank California for being developed

[@MinttMeringue]

Especially when I heard the stats at the beginning on states... 13 states require it to be medically accurate. 13. What???

[@chlonanu]

@@OphiuchiChannel yea 100% the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. another thing is that a lot of veterans are homeless and it's all about "respecting and loving" them for their sacrifice when they're overseas. but when they return it doesn't seem that there are many measures to protect them when they return. it's ironic

[@imid3440]

“did you mean to call a high school?” that broke my heart

[@starcherry6814]

I live in Michigan. Just graduated High school last year I’ll never forget when my favorite teacher was fired for teaching about condoms

[@stefanaurora4958]

That's so sad :(. I live in Romania and the only sex education I had in high school was "if you do it, God will punish you". I refused to follow that course.

[@anleg98]

im chilean, i graduated years ago but from other classmates who still have sibling at school, i heard that once a 6th grader probably for a joke asked a teacher what oral sex was, she responded and got fired, those kids obviously went home to watch any kind of porn learning trash about sex while the teacher who honestly wanted to teach comprehensively about sex lost her job

[@kirajai4774]

German schools do have to have sex, but it's basic heteronormative Bullshit often outdated and only one to two hours.

[@carlab2626]

Stefan Aurora oh my god you are right! I am from Romania too!

[@refinery29]

+starcherry That's so crazy!

[@hexx2211]

The best way to prevent abortion is to prevent unwanted pregnancy. _The best way to prevent abortion is to prevent unwanted pregnancy._ *_The best way to prevent abortion is to prevent unwanted pregnancy._* **inhales** *_THE BEST WAY TO PREVENT ABORTION IS TO PREVENT UNWANTED PREGNANCY._*

[@thatweirdo5048]

I think they’re too stupid to understand that. Even I Christian believe you should teach sex Ed because not everyone believe or will practice abstinence

[@desertfrights9217]

@@thatweirdo5048 preach, whether the educator be religious or not, abstinence should only be introduced as an alternative option for teens. Not the only option. That’s yikes.

[@Dgreen4154]

Please keep this about health and not bring Jesus into real life issues. The only reason people are against abortion is for religious BS reasons.

[@averekriz]

"hi this is grace" "HI THIS IS GRACE TOO"

[@alicemullin7950]

it was adorable how excited she was over that

[@gracehall9186]

This is also grace

[@gray-thesilverquill]

Graces Unite!

[@Nowegotbadblood]

Hahahahha my name was almost Grace

[@iriszeldaana]

seeing all the graces uniting on this one video… beautiful

[@alyssac7243]

Funny how the blonde lady at the end was probably told "don't have sex don't have sex don't have sex", became a teen mom anyway, and decided the best thing to do was to teach future generations that same way. Like, obviously that doesn't work...

[@2Ten1Ryu]

I also dislike the way she talks. Kinda aggressive and very fast. And she keeps repeating the word "uncomfortable". Guess what, lady. This is how YOU feel. Of course, everybody hearing anything about sex from you must feel the same way, because YOU make them feel it! Gosh, you need to start somewhere. If it's about safety and health of your children you have to get over yourself. She sais nobody wants to do the teaching job, yet you're talking about being the adulds. You know what? Abstinence is a stupid excuse that doesn't work and you're just trying to push away responsibilites.

[@poor_dumb_snek]

@@2Ten1Ryu I agree, only promoting and teaching abstinence doesn't work, it has never worked, which is obviously proved by the US having one of the largest teen pregnancy rates per year, in the world

[@salenebrom6476]

Alyssa C ☝️

[@kidswithhalos552]

Anne Mehlfeld Couldn’t have said it any better

[@chungleandthebims167]

it's uncomfortable because it's stigmatized and I don't think she realizes the way she wasn't taught is the reason she feels this way...and why she'll continue the way she is@@2Ten1Ryu

[@saraanders1194]

Both of these women found themselves pregnant at age 19...why? No sexual education. PERIOD.

[@notfunny1410]

Sara Anders no it's because they're dumb. Please don't use having no sex ed at school or from parents as an excuse.

[@TerranTaro]

@@notfunny1410 its actually a pretty big reason. Young girls who grow up in a dont ask, dont talk about sex society do not know anything abotu how babies are made. Imagine being told to follow god all your life and having sex once(not knowing anything about how to not get pregnant) and getting pregnant.

[@notfunny1410]

Mary Rosser I highly highly doubt teenagers don't know where babies come from even religious ones. But let's say 2 people truly don't know what sex is then why would they have sex? How would they come to that idea? I know I wouldn't.

[@saraanders1194]

@Harridira Sivagnanam There is nothing wrong with sex. They needed to protect themselves though but they were not armed with the knowledge or perhaps availability.

[@saraanders1194]

Harridira Sivagnanam why do you think you have that kinda mindset or those feelings of disgust? It’s systemic the suppression of sexuality.

[@stealthis]

That blonde chick that is pushing abstinence is essentially saying "I got into a car accident, so none of you should ever learn to drive!"

[@avianna8960]

stealthis more specifically: I never was taught how to drive and I got in a car accident, so you should never learn how to drive!

[@elliemay1748]

It’s even worse than that... it’s “I got into a car accident without learning how to drive, therefore we should PROMOTE not learning how to drive for everyone because people who learn how to drive still get into accidents!”

[@dp2432]

not really, I think she has a good point, I think age 12/13 is a little young to be having sex, I mean they should receive a proper education about it and have a choice sure. But I think educating about abstinence and why it's important to be ready and in the right mindset is equally important.

[@avianna8960]

D P I am from Washington, D.C.- where we mandate medically accurate and queer-inclusive sex ed. My first sex ed class was in the fifth grade. At the time it was good touch/bad touch don’t have sex. Then again in the eighth grade where they taught us how to use condoms, birth control methods, the risks of unprotected sex, not getting tested, and STDs. They also taught us about people of other sexualities and gender identities without negative judgement. All the while they still told us that the only 100% method to not get pregnant or infected with an STD is abstinence. Teen pregnancy rates here are extremely low compared to abstinence-only states and even though I only went to public schools in the inner city I’ve never had a pregnant student in my school. Sex Ed is effective, y’all! Just because it’s not abstinence only doesn’t mean that it’s not supporting abstinence.

[@milkteamachine]

@@dp2432 Teaching how to know when you're ready and teachung abstinence-only are two different things. Proper, comprehensive education is more important than making adults comfortable about talking to kids about sex.

[@user-rk5ri5mu9l]

"I mean look at your sexuality" I'm just...

[@watchmedo635]

In the UK you’re taught the basics of safe sex at age 11, which continues throughout the rest of your school career. Alabama is truly wild

[@katet8639]

Watch Me Do same here in The Netherlands. And i even got sex ed about other sexuality’s and stuff. Alabama is really something else.

[@emilyrose4269]

Not in catholic school though 🙄

[@motherohmy]

Yeah my younger friend got taught the basics and she's 9

[@motherohmy]

@@emilyrose4269 I was in a Catholic primary school and got taught about it early

[@_bryonyy_]

I think it’s in every developed country apart from America 😂😂

[@Kristiaxo]

can we please make this into a full-length documentary? i got so angry when it ended. this is such an important topic and it needs to be looked in more. I love all the Grace videos. Grace does a phenomenal job spreading the word.

[@SemlerMusic]

With Love Jenna ❤️

[@saraanders1194]

With Love Jenna YES AND GO To other places other than freaking Birmingham that’s NOT Alabama in its entirety.

[@racoonface]

This is so scary it’s like we’re living in the 30’s.

[@ShannaCarlson525]

1830s**

[@19Rena96]

@@KFrost-fx7dt oh please, just go away and stop this idiodic nonsense.

[@KFrost-fx7dt]

@@19Rena96 How old are you? This "idiotic nonsense" was the status quo up until about five years ago.

[@19Rena96]

@@KFrost-fx7dt lol where? In a village with 5 people or what?

[@KFrost-fx7dt]

@666xiety Nobody outside of Uganda gives enough of a fuck about you to murder you, snowflake. Stop pretending to be a victim. And yes, as long as civilization has existed pedophiles and rapists have existed, and the result is gender and sexuality disorders. I'm pretty sure PTSD has always existed too, that doesn't make it a good thing.

[@reaunesmall1382]

That damn abstinence pledge card. I signed mine senior year and was pregnant by freshman year of college. All the while I was queer and TERRIFIED of coming out. THANK YOU for talking about this

[@asdfghjkl-oo7lv]

I hope you're at a better place

[@taylorwinfrey8791]

Hey! This is Taylor, from the video! I signed that card almost 15 years ago now and it still comes to mind a lot. So much of my sex ed, both formal and informal, has taken years and years to unlearn (and I find myself still unlearning and retraining my brain now, at a month shy of 30!) Thanks for reaching out and telling your story. I truly believe storytelling is powerful for both the audience and the storyteller.

[@KFrost-fx7dt]

How the fuck do you get pregnant if you're gay?

[@reaunesmall1382]

@@asdfghjkl-oo7lv its a journey but for sure it's a million times better now. Luckily I can teach my kids what I never knew and provide a safe and honest space for them💗

[@asdfghjkl-oo7lv]

@@reaunesmall1382 you'll be the best parent. 💜

[@roses7868]

when i heard "no promo homo" i physically backed off and got a bit "excuse me?"

[@refinery29]

+roses Same.

[@dinosaint9878]

I am so grateful to live in New Jersey where were teach *medically correct* sex education and we're *not* homophobic.

[@Spyderrrrlil]

Exactly! Sexual Education in NJ at least in my area starts in fourth grade and continues until high school is completed. We even have class where juniors and seniors participate to teach their underclassmen all about sexual education.

[@Bvshbvnny]

I'm going into 12th grade this year and it will be my first time in sex ed. Our health classes before that are just drugs are bad, stop being depressed, and write some poems/songs that you're going to hate doing. The earliest they'll teach sex ed is 8th grade, but that's if they choose to put you in health class. Students are put into agriculture, tech (wood work), or health class that year and the students don't get to choose their fate. Yay for new york

[@jordan9224]

Dinosaint 987 Same thing with Maryland. I'm so grateful that my schools offer sex education (5th grade through high school) and most high schools in my area also offer a GSA.

[@willywimpy6026]

I am also grateful for New Jersey’s sex education, I’m from philly, but a lot of my teachers are from New Jersey so health class had everything from food and exercise to Sex ed

[@Janiyahh]

Yeah I wish I lived somewhere else Alabama sucks😕 It’s sad that i had to learn the truth from my mom and not from school.

[@lalakuma9]

My sister went through elementary & middle school in Catholic schools in Indonesia. She learned medically accurate sex ed in 6th grade. Some places in the US are worse and more backwards than developing countries.

[@saraanders1194]

Lala At catholic school in Alabama we got on our knees in church and pledged to remain virgins till marriage. Me: “god that’s bs imma wait till I’m 18.” We were separated from the boys and were taught that our bodies are a temple of god that deserved only love and the boys were actually taught about consent (which is amazing of course) but they only talked about sex wit them tho.

[@lilbihxxx1234]

Same but in the Caribbean.

[@TysMommy609]

@@saraanders1194 that's such a mixed bag! I don't think it's wrong to teach that your body is a temple and that it should be respected (because that's so true!) And boys should definitely be taught about consent, but boys AND girls need to both be taught about sex.

[@Clovesugarsugar]

Same with me! I went to Catholic school since kindergarten till middle school. I got proper sexual education since I was in 5th grade. In elementary school, sexual education was included in biology and PE class, while in middle school it was included in Guidance and Counseling class where we also learn about how to take care of our mental health. I'm really lucky because in Indonesia many people also opposing Sexual Education to be taught at school, so being able to receive Sexual Education class is a privilege. Also contrary to "Catholic school" that has been around in western society, a Catholic school (and Christian school) in Indonesia is the most progressive.

[@nmartanjb22]

Lala I went to a catholic school in Spain and we also learned a very comprehensive sex ed that included LGTB issues. While abstinence was recommended as a sure way not to get pregnant, many other anticontraceptive methods were explained and debated over. We were told their pros and cons, and recommended to chose one or another depending on the circumstances

[@hmaddox0371]

I'm still in high school in alabama and I can say for sure a teacher has never told us about safe sex, condoms, or contraceptives. I had to learn from the internet.

[@asdfghjkl-oo7lv]

And that can be overwhelming. I did the same thing. Spent all night googling about sex ed.

[@Abby_evans2023]

I was raised in Alabama and I still live here. I was homeschooled and was never taught about safe sex. The only real advice I was given is don’t have sex until you’re married.

[@triggereddemigod3236]

Same here The closest we got was a er nurse coming into our class to show us pictures of STDs and then they told us to not have sex. That was it. The only good thing from that experience was that he was an actual nurse...

[@archeologykhaleesi]

I live in Alabama and in Birmingham. This hits home

[@refinery29]

+avidatheist That's so crazy!

[@rosered8838]

I AM A BIG GAY RAT that drawing made me WHEEZE

[@emjenkins464]

The gay snail was just a mood...

[@HannahSnickers]

I want a shirt with that on it!! lol

[@mallorywhitt8995]

OKAY I JUST HAVE TO SAY I LIVE IN ALABAMA IT'S THE ONLY REASON I CLICKED ON THIS VIDEO AND ONCE THEY WENT INTO THE ACCEPTANCE CENTER I DIED. I HAVE BEEN THERE SO MUCH AND I GIVE THE GAY RAG A HIGH FIVE WHEN I WALK PAST HIM. IT IS THE COOLEST PLACE IN ALL OF ALABAMA IN MY OPINION. LAUREN, THE MOM WHO YOU SAW FIRST AT THE CENTERS A FREAKING GOD. ME AND ALL THE OTHER TEENS LOVE LAUREN BECAUSE SHE'S OUR MOM/DAD. I'M SO SORRY I JUST HAD TO FREAKING SPIT THIS OUT BECAUSE I KNEW ALMOST EVERYONE IN THAT ROOM AND WHEN THEY ZOOMED IN ON JARED EATING PIZZA I WHEEZED.

[@emersonhayes9740]

I thought no one was gonna talk abt that hahahahaha

[@lovenurtures3724]

Ok so Alabama don't teach their kids basic Biology...😳

[@spamemail5856]

Who needs biology

[@Janiyahh]

Love Nurtures I live in Alabama and my mom teaches me everything but she actually teaches me the truth

[@Janiyahh]

No that crap that they teach in school

[@Janiyahh]

*not*

[@breannahale6123]

Oh nah dude we learned about the fucking food chain and plant cells

[@thehoneyeffect]

Why do patriotic Americans think that America is the best place on earth when shit like this is happening there?

[@RyBrown]

thehoneyeffect Because this video was shot from a bad view. Not every country is perfect and I’m sure that I could say the same thing about every other country in the world

[@Thatghoul_lauren]

Because ignorance is bliss for most here unfortunately

[@jackierose1911]

Yeah it does make me angry when people brag about America being amazing because they are the privileged ones unaware of all the struggles other people suffer. I am fortunate enough to live in a state that is required to have medically accurate sex ed and i hope that more states will adopt the same mindset!!!

[@Shaaynaa101]

the best question of all time lmao

[@anahidemi5894]

It's a normal coping mechanism to act superior when you have low self esteem. I'd say it's pretty much the same thing.

[@WavingCats]

“I am a southern queer mom” “This is Taylor, a southern queer mom” 😂😂That editing made me laugh out loud hahaha

[@mish2773]

KaitlynVanBae nonono it was “I am a southern queer mOoOm

[@sideofglam]

WHY IN THE WORLD are wrinkly old men making decisions for WOMEN'S BODIES??!?!?!

[@KFrost-fx7dt]

In this case it was a wrinkly old woman.

[@vanithanair8264]

dyoka It’s not your fucking body you’re killing.

[@maggierobinson7433]

Preach

[@refinery29]

+sideofglaminstagram We don't know!!!!

[@ritiaggarwal995]

Kay Ivy is a woman tho

[@josheydubs]

Alabama scares me, however I am happy to see LGBTQ-friendly spaces in a not so friendly place.

[@8877dksljfa]

Its a wonderful center! The other half of the building provides medical care to lgbtqia folks and its amazing!

[@alexdh2001]

birmingham has some good lgbt spots! probably the least homophobic city in the state (still not saying much)

[@YumkieSegeio]

There's a reason we separated the Church and the Government.

[@nevadag606]

We sure have tried but it never really worked

[@londonthebridge]

Ok so here’s the question I have: How does Trump encourage abstinence in teens and yet have such sexual thoughts, words, and actions towards young girls? Tell them to not have sex UNLESS a GROWN MAN makes them? Then if that MAN gets them pregnant it’s the GIRLS fault for being impure?? That’s not just inconsistent but blatantly wrong. Thank you for talking about these important topics Grace. It’s important for different voices to be heard and understood, even if we disagree.

[@carolinegallegos_]

YES. THIS COMMENT.

[@livzarit4647]

I think it's so odd that school is supposed to prepare us for life but they're avioding something that is so natural.

[@romicor9]

They also get away with no teaching you about respect, boundaries and the emotional part of it, because they basically say nothing.

[@MizzKittyBichon]

Another problem with our current sex ed curricula that wasn't mentioned in this video is that reproductive disorders such as endometriosis, PCOS, and uterine fibroids are rarely, if at all, discussed, yet they are people at those ages who suffer from those conditions. In the case of endometriosis, it can take an average of 7-10 years (depending on the source) to be properly diagnosed with it. I believe this is because there isn't enough education on reproductive disorders in general. Instead, we are taught that menstrual cramps (even severe ones that interfere with daily routines and activities) are "normal." I remember one day during one of my ballet classes I was having these kind of cramps and my ballet teacher made me do the usual barre and floor exercises anyway because she believed that exercise helps relieve menstrual cramps. Well, not only did my cramps NOT go away, but I remember going home and plopping myself on my bed feeling like I was going to throw up. It would be many more years until I found out that the severe pain I was experiencing with each menstrual period was actually endometriosis. If I had known about endometriosis at that age, I could have been diagnosed sooner rather than later. Now I have trying to conceive for a few years now with no success so far, and I believe that my endometriosis may be part of the problem. If I still have no success by this fall, I may start having fertility testing done and using fertility treatments to get pregnant.

[@sophiesticated101]

It took me 10 years for a doctor to nonchalantly say "oh yeah. you have PCOS." I was relieved I finally got the answer but also infuriated because it took that long and 5 different doctors to finally get a diagnosis. It's more common than people think, so I don't know why it isn't discussed.

[@Rose-lz2et]

I feel your pain in a way, I was 20 when I found out I have PCOS and it was really hard to take in and I didn't even know what that was because I never heard anyone talk about it. I would get really bad cramps too and I thought I had endometriosis but I haven't gotten tested for it and right now the birth control is keeping my cramps at bay.

[@MizzKittyBichon]

@@sophiesticated101 I guess it's because a lot of people are of the mindset that if you have sex just ONE time, you are guaranteed to get pregnant and/or an STI. While that does happen to a lot of people, there are also many people that it DOESN'T happen to. I wish more people realized that it can take on average up to one year for even the healthiest of couples to conceive.

[@MizzKittyBichon]

@@Rose-lz2et I would encourage you to go to your doctor and have them do a transvaginal ultrasound. If nothing is found on the ultrasound, then you can ask your doctor for a laparoscopy. I was extremely lucky that the ultrasound was able to detect endometriosis in both ovaries and general pelvic area. Most other people don't even know that they have endo until they have a laparoscopy done. If any endo is found, you might want to look into stronger meds that have longer lasting effects than birth control. I have heard way too many stories about people using birth control to relieve cramps only for them to flare back up once they stop using birth control, and oftentimes those cramps are because of endometriosis. I am of the belief that birth control tends to mask endo symptoms rather than directly treat them. It's important to get to the root of the problem in order to properly treat it. In case you are wondering, yes it is possible to have both PCOS AND endo.

[@Rose-lz2et]

@@MizzKittyBichon Thanks for your great advice, my gyno did a transvaginal ultrasound were we were able to see the cysts on my ovaries and that was were she casually told me "oh you have PCOS". I am definitely going to go back and ask about endo because I do agree that birth control doesn't really treat endo but only acts as a pain reliever for as long as you continue taking the pills. Thanks for your suggestion again, I really hope I don't have endo and I hope I wouldn't have to get laparoscopy done because that sounds really scary :(

[@Cragrockformations]

Grace gives off such chaotic gay energy i love it 🏳️‍🌈

[@SemlerMusic]

It's Amanda Time Chaotic Gay Energy should be the title of my memoir hahaha.

[@Cragrockformations]

@@SemlerMusic now that you mentioned it I want that to be the title of my memoir too lol

[@KFrost-fx7dt]

Yet she tries to reach out to normal people and is surprised when they hang up on her.

[@annaewen3377]

"You cant not educate people on something, not talk about something and then effectively punish them for the silence that YOU implemented" PREACH

[@AndreaPerez-jk9pr]

“I don’t understand how we’re having this conversation, and not the other one. It feels like you’re treating a symptom, you’re not treating the problem”

[@Fraxinus_a]

My church had those abstinence prayer cards, where you signed and your father signed. My mom kept signing me up for the abstinence only class but I never went because I had already had sex. At the time I was 16 and felt guilty and shameful for already being sexually active, so I never wanted to take the class because of the guilt, I felt unworthy. We need to have more of these conversations, so thank you Refinery 29.

[@missmelodies52]

Those were abusive trash. Im glad you had the guts to explore sex anyway.

[@refinery29]

+fraxinus_a Thank you for sharing your experience with us!

[@carolinegallegos_]

It is so damn creepy how Christians like give ownership of a girl’s virginity to her father. It’s freaky, creepy, incestuous cult like behavior. It makes me want to vomit. Your dad should have absolutely nothing to do with your sex life. Period.

[@ciciheart6085]

'Were you gonna say that I look gay?' haha QUEEN!

[@KFrost-fx7dt]

She looks like a boy.

[@angelbarajas9180]

@Stan Ethereal Figures No they were just stating that she looks like a boy :/

[@angelbarajas9180]

@Stan Ethereal Figures Oh okay I didn't know

[@cherylrose6022]

i mean she does lol. and that's not equivalent to a bad thing. she just looks gay lol

[@Amateur_Pianist_472]

Kaiser Frost she is masculine yes. Nothing wrong with that. Nothing wrong with feminine men either. Not everyone fits into the same box. It’s nature.

[@j.h.6081]

"No Promo Homo." Says what type of people Alabama lawmakers are right there.

[@biancat7761]

Someone said that aloud and smiled at himself and laughed and said. Yep. That's what we will call it. Like w. T. F.

[@lulu5803]

I live in Alabama and had never heard of that. But, yes, that is what the majority of our lawmakers are- a bunch of overgrown frat boys with a few token women.

[@ishani1274]

Really admire Grace for taking the time to sit with an abstinence focussed sex-educator and hear her out fairly. May not have agreed with her, but a fair hearing of her ideas was so useful to understand how discourses are built and results can be delivered.

[@Luubelaar]

This just blows my mind. I'm in Australia. I had sex ed in school from 6th grade, so for me that was 1987. By the time I was in 11th grade, sex ed was talking about things like STD's, the most effective ways to prevent pregnancy, and yes, abortion was talked about too. I don't remember the first time LGBT+ sex ed was discussed. I think it was about 8th grade? There were a few openly gay students at my school, and some others who I learned "came out" in the years after school. The big emphasis was always on safe sex. "IF you have sex, make it safe." I just don't understand why Alabama and other states like it, are pushing abstinence only when it's been proven that it DOES NOT WORK. And now you can't have an abortion so buckle up! There's going to be an explosion of teenage parents in the next few years.

[@starcherry6814]

This is why education is so important. A lot of people don’t even know how abortion or birth control even works 😔

[@joselinegarcia57]

Moving from Orlando Florida to Alabama was a real shock. For one, the culture is absolutely different. You see gay couples everywhere in Orlando and it’s normal. In Alabama they shun them and it really pisses me off how Alabama is living like the 1950s

[@lulu5803]

I live in Birmingham which is a bit more "progressive" (though it's hard to use progressive when describing anything in Alabama...) than rural areas. I know a lot of gay people who are happy living here and thriving, raising families, etc... There are some awful, backwards thinking people here, but there are also a whole lot of kind, loving, accepting people here. If you're away from the larger, metro areas, it may be really different for gay people.

[@sophie4221]

This is why Alabama is my least favorite state in the US

[@stephaniemccord8677]

Alabamian here. All I got were STD pictures as scare tactics.

[@jemmastar5649]

stephanie mccord God, that’s awful! People need to just accept the fact that sex is a part of life and schools around the country need to be open to teaching people about it.

[@_homewardbound_4149]

I live in a provincial capital in Canada and that's all I got as well

[@cassiec9992]

_homewardbound_ which city would that be? Starting from elementary school in Calgary I received really comprehensive sex Ed all the way up till grade 10. Really interesting how it changes across the country

[@_homewardbound_4149]

@@cassiec9992 Halifax, but out in the shitty part of the subburbs

[@mackenziejones8592]

I lived in Alabama the year I got sex ed and something that still stands out in my mind is a demonstration where they gave a student a cup of clean drinking water and then one of the gym coaches spit in the cup and said drink it. When the student said no that’s gross the gym coach said see that’s what having sex is like. If you have sex with more than one person you’re just a dirty drink that nobody wants to drink.

[@MySeasideRendezvous]

I went to a Catholic grammar school in Chicago and we learned about condoms and different types of birth control. My school spent about a week on this each year from 5-8th grade. I’m so glad they did!

[@elizabethcassell9509]

I also went to a Catholic grammar school in Chicago and had a very different experience. I’m glad that there are religious schools doing right by kids.

[@Sharonformation]

What do you call teenagers who are taught abstinence only? Parents!

[@cherub_in]

good one 😭😭😭

[@CharlieCapp]

Hi this is Grace. No, *i’m* Grace

[@SemlerMusic]

Charlie Capp There’s only room for one Grace on this phone line haha.

[@Princess-Lavender]

No... IM grace

[@ashleylongford5931]

That sounds like “No ,I’m Patrick”

[@xxrandom_userxx9994]

"There is glitter in the wall!!!" -Grace 2019

[@SemlerMusic]

Karina Staneva Give me a home makeover show!!!!!

[@bellalake1648]

It is so dangerous! I am lucky. Where I am from, state and church are seperated so we get an education based on science. There are almost no teenage moms in The Netherlands.

[@horseluverofawesomeness3006]

whats crazy is church and state are SUPPOSED to be separate here too.

[@ebencipe]

annabel lake in our country, we have the separation of church and state but officials are so rooted with religion that their choices are always based on whats in the bible instead of the well being of an individual...

[@pleaseclap3335]

The silver lining here is that the youth have the internet to learn about these important topics. Watching videos like these will hopefully make them be proactive about researching for themselves. It shouldn't be up to them to educate themselves on these subjects but it's a lot more than we had even a decade ago (yes we had the internet but not as many resources as there are today). I grew up in Texas and only had one sex ed class that taught us about pregnancy and STDs but not how to prevent them, and I lived in a more liberal city. The downside is the youth might learn about sex through pornography and we all know just how inaccurate it is to real life and how damaging it could be to their self-confidence.

[@behindzerosp]

The bad part is they use porn which isn`t accurete and puts that notion of 1 binary sex 2 only based on male pleasure that 2 often involves abuse or agresive acts during sex

[@msoda8516]

I’m so glad I grew up and raise in New Jersey where it’s required that we teach medically accurate sex education. My husband grew up in Ohio and the lack of education he was given is shocking.

[@SnowWhiteProduction1]

I’ve honestly never heard of “no promo homo” and I’m shocked lmao

[@JR.849]

Same! And I've lived in Alabama my whole life

[@JodiLeaSnakeQueen]

@@JR.849 me too

[@daniibp23]

I think the most sex ed I ever had was my teachers explaining parts of the body and later on kind of explaining periods. I remember at one point my parents were asked to give permission so I could attend sex ed in my school in Florida, they said no and that they would teach me. They didn't. They only told me to not have sex. I ended up learning about sex through porn and Google searches. Thank God Planned Parenthood has so much information online. I don't even live in the States anymore and it's been so, so useful, especially now that I started taking birth control at 24.

[@starcherry6814]

I’ve learned so much about my body because of Planned Parenthood. ❤️

[@BatsAndBadgers]

my main question here is why are periods being explained in a sexual health class and not simply biology class

[@refinery29]

+danielaberdiapfeifer Thank you for sharing your story with us!

[@buffycatnip]

my older sister told me what sex was when i was 12. i knew that a man and woman had to do something but i didn't know exactly what. so if i had any questions, i would ask my sister cause i knew my mom wouldn't tell me jack.

[@vividwolf6247]

Same here, I didn't get sex ed class till my senior year of highschool and like you discribed there was no teaching of safe sex. When I went to my mom she just told me she didn't know how to talk about the topic because she never got that talk from her mom. I was just told to avoid sex with fear tactics. Will not repeat the same cycle with my daughter.

[@maegancobb8876]

I live in Alabama and i am SO GLAD that you made a video on this! Thank you!

[@sophie4221]

Maegan Cobb I would move quickly if I were you

[@mpscats360]

when I imagine Alabama I imagine it as a town stuck in the 1800.

[@RiverMLP]

I mean.... you're not entirely wrong, but we do have cities that are modern 😬

[@bumblebeeyell]

Okay, but know what my point of view on this is? If Alabama's banning abortion, then they *BETTER* step up with funding and help for their fostering and adoption system down there- As well as mental health services for those who have stillborn children or children who die shortly after birth due to health complications that they have. They're also going to have to deal with the guilt of *potentially being the cause of a young woman's death (because some people require abortions because they physically aren't able to carry a child to full term)*

[@edithmarat5980]

Sex is completely natutal. Everybody has it. So will those students. They'll have sex even if you not teach them about it so why aren't you preventing them from getting a serious illness or becoming pregnant which isn't good for them mostly, neither for the mother nor for the baby

[@jemmastar5649]

radischengottin EXACTLY! Teaching how to have safe and protected sex might help to prevent serious injuries, illnesses, or unearned pregnancies.

[@GeeklingNo1]

Ikr! Like I think abstinence is the better option but if the kid wants to f*ck they're gonna and there's nothing you can do about it so give them the chance to do it safely!

[@mirandapriest4934]

@@pmakiie262 im asexual but i have sex🤷🏻‍♀️ it means lack of sexual attraction. Im not sexually attracted to anyone but if i feel the love i will for the emotional feeling during it

[@pmakiie262]

Hitlerdid Nothingwrong? I didn't want to say that all asexuals don't have sex.

[@sheryl080]

This is so sad the more we stop talking about it the worse it's going to get and everyone should have rights to sex education and should be aware of all the precautions to be taken

[@abigail5354]

I went to high school in Alabama AND it was a catholic school. So I learned absolutely nothing!! And LGBTQ+ conversations? Non existent

[@refinery29]

+abigilhutchens Wow, that's so sad!

[@biratebryan5479]

Why is Grace so good at finding rational people to talk to about complicated issues. lol

[@fini5294]

That woman in the end seemed very passionate about stopping teen pregnancies. She should have been confronted with the Data that what she's doing will lead to more pregnancies!

[@christinesrensen2265]

Sex ed should not be a subject in high schools. That is crazy. It should be a subject waaaay earlier.

[@verti2790]

we had ONE sex-ed lesson throughout my entire school career, and the guy just walked in, talked to us about all the horrible stds we would get if we didn't stay abstinent, made sure to stress (mainly to the girls) how disgusting we would be if we weren't virgins and how no one would ever want us if we had sex before marriage, then went on like a 10 minute rant about how watching porn would somehow make you bad at sex later in life (for some reason porn was the thing he spent the most time on out of everything??? i'm still confused about that and it's been years) when he got done "educating" us, there were still like 20 minutes left in the class, so he just pulled up another powerpoint he had on his computer about how evolution was fake and preached to us about how charles darwin was the devil for the rest of the time. i'm still not sure if it was supposed to be a part of the lesson or if he just kinda went off the rails at the end there this was our 8th grade year and when we came back after summer break, there were already 3+ girls going into their freshman year of high school pregnant, so yeah i guess you could say the sex education system in america is doing pretty good

[@empresscrafts689]

oh gosh

[@tomsnowden6201]

Not exactly wrong tbh..Sti is through the ROOF and no guy wants a girl who’s been ran through by the whole school..you might not like it but that’s how it is

[@sideofglam]

Hey Alabama, I'm starting to feel more like a Handmaid every day.......

[@vanithanair8264]

Hey ignoramus, no one is forcing you to reproduce...

[@almamater489]

@@vanithanair8264 yet

[@Anna-zp1ok]

@@vanithanair8264 abortion isnt even allowed if you were raped. That's ridiculous.

[@venmar106]

Wtf is wrong with u thinking that, god get some help. Nobody is forcing you to have a baby tf.

[@kingzans6677]

@@venmar106 The abortion laws literally force people to have babies... including people who were raped, who were forced to have sex, and then forced to bear the child of their rapist. So yeah. They effectively are forcing women to have babies.

[@jessicatollefson5304]

I'm from Huntsville, Alabama (about 1.5 hours from Birmingham) and I currently live here, after moving to San Diego, CA for six years. I graduated high school in 2007. I remember taking a mandatory sex education class in 10th grade. The class was a complete and utter joke. The "teacher" was so obviously biased that the entire semester felt like one long, drawn-out scolding. For reference, you can picture the sex ed scene from Mean Girls. That's how stigmatized and ridiculous it was.

[@Rookwyn]

I live in Huntsville too, I graduate from high school next year and was never given a proper sex ed class, I was never taught how straight sex works let alone gay sex the kind that I actually need to know about.

[@jenniferjuliana10]

"This is Grace" "Omg, I'm Grace too" 😂😂😂

[@carultch]

I'm surprised both of them being named Grace didn't get her the time of day to talk.

[@caitlynirish3457]

I’m from Kentucky, my freshman year of high school I had health class for only half the year and we only spent a week or so on sex ed. We were taught abstinence only and we learned nothing about sex for lgbtq+ people. So while Kentucky has laws for the use of religion in sex Ed. For those of us that live in rural areas, while god isn’t mentioned it still controls what we are taught in public schools. I learned most my sex Ed from outside sources and i think the lack of sex Ed is what leads to my areas high teen pregnancy rate.

[@refinery29]

+caitlynirish Wow, things really need to change!

[@kelseyc203]

This is what my experience with sex ed was in Alabama.

[@notfunny1410]

Caitlyn Irish why should teens learn about LGBT sex? It should be purely biological otherwise it's not appropriate. Im bi and it would make me very uncomfortable..

[@iamafrenchqueen5994]

Caitlyn Irish I live in Kentucky too, Lexington Ky

[@mimi.dixon.b]

@@notfunny1410 perhaps its the people who must change so they don't treat it as such a taboo subject......you aren't entitled to a life free from feeling uncomfortable, you're free to the pursuit of happiness, life, and liberty. It's not like they'd be showing hardcore gay porn in classrooms- all sex is biological, it involves two or more human organisms. Can you elaborate on why incorporating LGBT gender, sexuality, and sexual health risk information into a sex ed program would make you very uncomfortable? or why addressing the future sexual activities of part of the population is deemed inappropriate in your eyes?

[@hannyadisme]

I love how open minded and calm Grace always stays with these issues even when faced with difficult people. Love her!

[@refinery29]

+dcinfinity Us too!

[@annaomodeo7318]

I come from Italy and I have to say I thank my teachers for taking the time to talk about sex ed since 5th grade, yes it must have felt uncomfortable for them to talk about it in front of a bunch of kids but it needed to be done and I am really grateful, especially after seeing this video.

[@battigiadorata]

You're lucky, I live in Toscany and I recevied no sex education at all.

[@kurzler]

in che città/regione vivi? io vivo a napoli e non ho mai fatto educazione sessuale in tutta la mia vita (ora vado in secondo liceo)

[@lightishredgummi]

So I live in Colorado. At first, I was thinking "oh, I never had any sex-ed class at my school or a class where it would be talked about" and then I remembered that's not true. In my personal fitness and wellness class in high school, apparently we were SUPPOSED to learn a bit about sex-ed, but my teacher literally said that she didn't wanna teach us that and that we could just look it up ourselves. thankfully, I at least have a bit of an idea about sex-ed because of the various educational videos that have been in my recommended on KZbin over the years that each had bits and pieces of information. what I'm saying is that I'm at least not completely inept.

[@aaaicila_]

I’m from Texas and the only time I remember learning about sex is when our school had a speaker come talk to us on the topic. Our parents had to sign a waiver that allowed us into the presentation, so if your parents didn’t want you learning about sex and std’s, you didn’t. Anyways, it was like 20 min presentation and that was it. The presentation was short and just skimmed over certain points instead of really going into detail about the risks of unprotected sex. Not sure how it is for other states, but here, I was required to take a health class that taught students about sex and disease prevention before I could graduate college. But by that point, just about everyone in the class had already been having sex for years so it’s almost like a little too late.

[@OldMillennialBR]

Alabama is so Gilead

[@refinery29]

+marieribeiro OMG!

[@sophianewman9911]

i wrote a research paper this year on the negative effects of teaching abstinence education. thank you for making this video, because not enough people are talking about the huge sexual health education issue in america

[@criscuevas1225]

Also in other Catholic or religious countries, like mine haha, and talking about sex ed is really hard here especially for those people who are outdatedly conservative

[@refinery29]

+sophianewman Thank you so much for watching & for sharing with us!

[@MCHkid13]

I don't know about anybody else but I felt sex ed was interesting and very informative. If anything, it made me want to be more careful with sex cuz have y'all seen a picture of gonorrhea? Have you? It's freakin' traumatizing! ༼ ༎ຶ ෴ ༎ຶ༽

[@kirin1230]

How did you type that crying face? Also, I agree.

[@MCHkid13]

@@kirin1230 I just googled crying emoticons and clicked on one of the suggestions which brought me to a whole slew of crying emoticons including this one.

[@erica5513]

In Ohio, we had sex ed week in health class. It was informative, but there wasn't a single mention of LGBTQ topics. Even in 2009 when I took it, I knew it was sorely lacking. Ten years later it doesn't sound like it has gotten much better. These things *need* to be talked about

[@sophiawells3842]

Erica I took that class last year and yes, it was informative, but there was no mention of LGBTQ topics save when someone brought it up to the teacher

[@summerpowell9746]

This year, I'm a sophomore at a high school in Ohio. When I was in eighth grade, we had a week where all the girls went to the female health teacher and the boys went to the male one to talk about sex. There was no mention of the LGBTQ community and we were taught that abstinence was the only way of going about sex. The teacher gave us these cards that made us promise to be abstinent until marriage and told us to sign them and keep them in our wallets. It was kind of ridiculous.

[@oliviaj9037]

Surely if people wanted to stop casual sex, they would teach children about it to warn them... instead of saying nothing, setting them loose, then wondering why so very little abstained and just punishing them with a child who will do the same thing. LOL.

[@oliviaj9037]

@AFGThugonomics9 I would have thought warning against it would be the best method, instead of just not talking about it. It doesn't make much sense to me to not talk about it, because that doesn't really make children abstain. I haven't looked into any statistics, so you'll know more than me in that respect. Maybe there's some happy medium they will find eventually.

[@oliviaj9037]

@AFGThugonomics9 I definitely think sex ed could be improved, i haven't seen anyone really get much out of the classes tbh. And mine wasn't really useful. I'm in England so i probably have a different experience to you. I do think they should paint casual sex as a more dangerous thing than they do. People are just like 'go for it! find yourself', which i wouldn't personally agree with.

[@oliviaj9037]

@AFGThugonomics9 Yeah it's just very surface level. (Not saying that i wanna see super graphic things either). Yeah cali is probably very similar. hahah yes the thots and fukboys are multiplying stay safe my man : D Honestly though people who act like that, can they fully say it's a good and happy lifestyle ? I mean why would you even want to be a thot? To each their own. I think another place where the school system may fail is that theres not a good role model too, i don't remember my sex ed teacher at all, i'm sure it'd help if the teachers were inspirational and good role-models (idk how, or who that would be though)

[@oliviaj9037]

@AFGThugonomics9 Yeah i think a lot of people make mistakes when they're teens with who to trust. It then turns into their relationship experience so they're likely to do very similar things, even if they didn't enjoy it. Many toxic teen relationships out there, bc neither one of them know them selves or are really mature enough. lol if keanu, chris or shawn taught the class the kids would treat it like bible : P Imagine Gordon Ramsey calling u an idiot sandwich over your poor life choices? haha You watch mrs midwest?! I love her and her videos, but i've not heard of the other ones so i'll check them out. Thats cool, i didn't know that about one of their models! i don't really follow much of that kind of thing.

[@oliviaj9037]

@AFGThugonomics9 It's only because that's the norm now, and everyone is trying to loose their virginity as soon as. People who don't are shamed for it .. Sex ed should paint waiting in a much better light, rather than showing how to do anything and everything and then being like go do it now. I think giving kids choices is the best thing to do, we can't stop anything anyways. haha i know mine would : D yeah lol but i dont think many people would want to see his wrath again so prob most effective method! more so than condoms : P Yeah she so easy to watch, totally changed my view on some aspects of femininity (for the better). She's one of the only people i can think of that promotes femininity and masculinity in a non toxic way.

[@icebear4839]

I think this issue could be resolved just by the way the host said it, have Sex Education, and if you do lower rates of all the things that are necessary will happen.

[@renee1390]

“Don’t promote religion” hi, teen from Kentucky here and just because there is a law doesn’t mean that it applies

[@AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHs]

Sophie Renee that’s pretty much what all teachers here talk about

[@iamafrenchqueen5994]

Sophie Renee true that I live in Lexington Kentucky by the way

[@sadboi1135]

They don't promote it here in Perry, you can lose your job for promoting religion in sex Ed.

[@Scott-yk7ue]

I’m from Georgia and we learned about drugs, mental illness, puberty, etc. but not a word about sex or how to protect ourselves against pregnancy or sti’s

[@Petersauntmay]

Scott im from north georgia and they only taught us to use condoms or dont have sex. But nothing else. And the sex ed part of the health class was maybe 2 weeks at most.

[@Scott-yk7ue]

Mea Faith it’s honestly frightening how ill equipped they have us

[@sophie4221]

I feel like most of the states passing the abortion-bill doesn’t even educate people on sex

[@violetprison2645]

It baffles me that America is called ‘land of the free’ still...

[@spamemail5856]

I'm free

[@itskass3146]

rename it to 'land of toxic men' since we like nicknaming our country after what we have so much of

[@NipponAsahi]

Free from sex ed medically accurate

[@lex4987]

My school counselor here in Texas confided in me that she wished she could hand out condoms but would lose her job if she did. Sex ed in this country is a travesty and the degradation of women is often integral to abstinence only sex ed. They promote false statistics and it only hurts the younger generation. The Purity Myth is a great read for those interested in the effects of how we talk about sex and women in society. Great Job Grace! Love your series!

[@Avellania]

This reminds me of the story of how my grandfather tried to give my dad the talk. It was at the dinner party for my parents' engagement. My dad was 24 at the time. Grandfather took my dad to another room. My grandfather's side of the conversation went like this: "So now that you are engaged I think it's time..." "Oh, you already have?" "Then my job is done. Have fun."

[@thesquarerootofpiisonepoin8486]

.....and that ladies and gentlemen is why alabama has it's reputation

[@aquariantrilogy7523]

When I was growing up in the 90s to 2000s, in junior high we learned about what to expect when we started developing as teens (genders were separated). We all got sent home with an permission slip before this happened. We were provided things that a teen of each gender would need like (pads, liners, tampons, deodorant, etc.). Once I got into high school same process but this time both genders learned about sex, becoming pregnant, the possible risks and to make better informed decisions. Never forget how of course the teens boys were thrilled about the idea but when the part about what results from sex like pregnancy or diseases they were horrified. I can say however all of us who learned this education didn't do so bad. In the end, sex is sex, teach everyone about all the possibilities good or bad and in general you have a better informed educated generation.

[@osixjoh]

"This conduct is a criminal offense under the laws of the state." 5:09 Hold up - homosexuality is illegal in Alabama? In 2019?!

[@yakigesher-zion7289]

it is punished by the death penalty in 11 countries...... as of 2019

[@Eric-ys8do]

technically but in 2003 the courts banned the state from enforcing it

[@nola4364]

No it's not but some schools are required to teach/lie that it is

[@anthonyguillory4036]

Welp, gotta go back into the closet with my gf (I’m in middle school don’t mind the pfp)

[@RiverMLP]

@@anthonyguillory4036 Why are you dating in middle school

[@ilya7314]

This was in my recommended and I couldn't feel more relieved. I moved school last year and go to a school in a different school district that is kindergarten through 8th grade. When I was in 5th grade at my Elementry school, the girls learned about periods. In 6th grade, we got our sex education. The boys and girls were not separated and the teacher taught us about homosexuality in a neutral way and didn't use any negative connotations to describe it. In the middle school I am in now, my friend told me that they had 1 lesson where the girls learned about periods and a puberty talk the teacher gave them. I felt that was unfair and that our school needed more on that topic but thought that maybe they'd teach us in high school. So far, we have had no lessons or anything on sex ed in the school I go to currently. Meanwhile, I asked my Elementry school friend if at her middle school she had learned anything and they had a whole unit on it where they learned a lot. Needless to say, thanks for shedding light on this topic.

[@mollyx3176]

‘ but today is Thursday ‘ .... ‘ next week’ * hangs up*

[@rubygross7684]

I think this series is very well-made and entertaining. It also inspires me to be more open to people I disagree with. When I hear people in your videos on a totally opposite side than me I can feel myself disregarding their thoughts to some degree right away. I will be active in listening to the people all around me, I’m going to work harder to be calm and open minded. It felt good to learn about all these perspectives. Thank you for being so brave in doing that, keep it up. 💜

[@emtello3808]

I went to public school in NJ and they taught us sex ed a fair amount to students. It wasn't until my school offered a year-long optional sex-ed class was where I learned more than all those years combined. To this day I'm glad my school had that course because it taught me and other classmates not only sex ed but safe sex, birth control options, how to get out of uncomfortable sexual situations, consent and saying no.

[@danneighheart1890]

In my 19 years of living in Florida I never had a sex education course or class at all at my school. My mom is a RN so she took me to an seminar for young adults her hospital put for the summer. It was really fun actually and I learned a lot about both lgbtq+ and straight sex education.

[@jenniferburgett8328]

Female Alabamian here. That new bullshit scares me to death. Thank you for this. For showing people the lack of education we get growing up. It's pathetic & inexcusable

[@tinystrawberry34]

Thank you, Refinery29 for championing this incredible series. Go Grace, Tina, and the SOG team! ❤️❤️❤️

[@dr.stevephil6700]

"can you call back on Wednesday or Thursday" "but...but... today is Thursday" "No next Thursday" XDD

[@allisongomez5787]

As a high school student in California, I had no idea that there was still this type of thinking in a developed country like the U.S.

[@buffycatnip]

i'm from Wisconsin and we were taught about sex, condoms, etc in health class in high school. didn't realize how many states were backwards on this kind of stuff.

[@saraanders1194]

Welcome to Hell.

[@tyghe_bright]

In the 60s, my mom was raised Catholic, in Texas. The first time she had sex, she didn't know that's what she was doing. She knew sex was "bad", but knew so little about it that she had intercourse without knowing it was sex. It's no wonder that she was pregnant at 15, and again at 17. She's fortunate that she didn't get any STDs -- and that was pre-HIV. Its heartbreaking to see so many people deliberately hobbled by lack of education.

[@Devonoved444]

i feel so happy watching these videos, it educates me more about political issues especially when it comes to things like this. thank you grace, you say really meaningful things that make me think about them for a long time. all love from singapore ❣️

[@martinemiller3196]

Fantastic episode! Thank you so much for bringing these important topics to light!! Keep it up!

[@fernandarivera9379]

I currently live in Birmingham, Alabama. Former alumnus at Thompson High School just 30 ish minutes from BHM. Going back to when I was in middle school I remember being separated from the boys and going into the locker rooms to talk about “sex”. It was a very half assed explanation of what it is and the different ways a girl could lose her virginity. I remember having more questions than answers. All the speaker really spoke about was abstinence abstinence abstinence. BHM is growing as a city and people are open to almost everything now, which is great! Unfortunately, the fact that Alabama is very religious makes it hard to talk about sex in any school. If anything also educate the parents to learn how to talk to their kids about sex at an early age.

[@reginabedgood1799]

Did y'all have Miss Renee?? Did she use the packing tape on her arm to represent virginity???

[@fernandarivera9379]

i graduated in 17’! don’t remember that teacher tho

[@refinery29]

+fernandarivera We couldn't agree more!

[@honeysana672]

people from both sides want the same thing: good sexual health.

[@LeCheckmate]

If you mean the people that teach proper sex ed and the people that teach abstinence only, sure. But the easy is that there is literally no sex ed in countless schools. Which absolutely won't lead to good sexual health.

[@asdfghjkl-oo7lv]

@@LeCheckmate true... my parents didn't really give me a good "sex talk" and I learned most of my sex ed in college (I took a Human Sexuality course). It was the best thing ever.

[@LeCheckmate]

@@KFrost-fx7dt Get out

[@KFrost-fx7dt]

@@LeCheckmate You're not special.

[@LeCheckmate]

@@KFrost-fx7dt Precisely. So why do you choose to treat people differently when we're all the same? Sod off, bigot

[@rayax2805]

Also, I absolutely love this. With how Grace is (very kind, not afraid to ask questions, even being brave enough to go somewhere where people could be so rude) and also how she reminds me of Al from Fear the Walking Dead. From looks, attitude, and I’m sure she’d be kick ass like her too, and the safe zone! I don’t remember the name but it’s so so special there’s something there for those who need it!! ❤️

[@saar5836]

I'm from the Netherlands and sex education plays a big role in our education system. It already starts in grade 2, by explaining where babies come from. In grade 5 I learned about sexual abuse and the consequences and the importance of speaking out. In grade 7 and 8 I learned about STD's, birth control, pregnancies and the inner workings of the bodies of men and women. In grade 9 through 11 it also came up once in a while. I have never experienced sexual education as uncomfortable. Maybe in the first two seconds of each class, but it has always been a very easy subject for me and my peers to talk about. I believe as a teacher you need to get over these first two seconds and realize that this is something important and very normal that needs to be talked about and that your students are most of all very curious and want to learn those things. I have never learned about abstinence, I only learned about the facts and how to ensure my own safety when it comes to sex.