The shocking reality of moving to Europe.

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Exploring Portugal has been quite the journey. Definitely not what we expected.
Frankly speaking, the twists and turns have been a bit dizzying...
But we are hanging in there and taking on the challenges as they come. After all, this is ultimately about redefining our future, and no one said that was going to be easy.
Watch on as we take you through the next chapter of our wacky adventure.
Jump points:
0:00 - Intro
1:38 - The Tourist Syndrome
3:43 - Embracing Discomfort
6:30 - In Search of a Good Match
8:50 - Final Message
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[@nathanieldrew]

I love the honesty here, and seeing how fearlessly you share how you personally feel while remaining respectful to the people and culture in Portugal, where we as a family have had some really beautiful experiences and where I have a lot of wonderful memories. You've done a brave thing by taking a leap into the unknown, and with that comes a lot of bruised knees and elbows as you find your way. Moving abroad can be really hard, it will always teach you something about yourself. I think some of these struggles are part of the process but you're navigating it incredibly well. Can't wait to see what comes next... !!

[@pilarvelez9278]

Such a close and loving family; so heartwarming!

[@BeneaththeSurfaceYT]

Thank you, you are the best. 🙏 Love you. ❤️

[@tooruhlateable7584]

@@BeneaththeSurfaceYT Simple and pure vlogs... Love it

[@Alice-zp7qp]

This made me cry! You guys... what an incredible family! Stay strong.. All will make sense at some point... moving abroad is a super enriching yet hard experience and you will find your way for sure. Brave and authentic :)

[@Philix22]

Next time, rank your priorities and wait for some suggestions from locals. Portuguese are always very helpful and will help you find the right place for you. Portugal is a small country but each place is very different from another, even if we're talking about a 30-40 miles distance. Rank your priorities and talk with locals (here, for instance). What you've done was very courageous, but also a little bit risky. Good luck for future!

[@cahillgreg]

I emigrated as a teen and have lived in 4 countries - The priority is learning the language and interacting with the people and culture. The housing is secondary. Not having the language is alienating and makes all the 'ups and downs' much harder to contend with.

[@TukozAki]

@@donaldothomoson Wouldn't interacting with the people help in that regard?

[@user-kn6et8bb2d]

Thank you for mentioning 1. Language and 2. Adapting. I am so sick and tired of US emigrants (mostly) that are loud, very present and very much thinking the world revolves around them and will change to their likes. And feel loudly angry when their ridiculous assumptions are not met.

[@SIMONREMISH]

look, I don't know if you can help me, but I am from Moldova and I have mindlessly moved to the neighbouring country Romania. Not a huge difference but it's a lot more developed and in EU (same language). I don't want to keep living here and I want to live in a place with lots of foreigners, basically to speak English on the daily. I'm so unsure about my future, yesterday it even occured to me: maybe even the US? but I legit don't know how to find the final answer and search for my destination. Do you have any tips to offer and what would you do in my place?

[@miguelmonteiro7942]

I think learning the language and interacting with the locals are very important for settling in a foreign country. It's very common for Brits and Americans relying on English to get by. That is wrong and doesn't help with settling in. I'm an immigrant too. When I moved to Barcelona I learnt Spanish and Catalan ( local language). Now I'm living in the UK. When I left Portugal 31 years ago I decided that I wouldn't be comparing Portugal with Spain or that I would expect things would be like in Portugal Every country has its challenges and difficulties and differences. Don't assume or expect that things will be like the US way. Embrace the differences instead of complaining and enjoy the ride.

[@vrankholland8113]

@@user-kn6et8bb2d This!

[@kenrehill8775]

Never confuse being a tourist with being a resident. Two different worlds.

[@thomaspick4123]

Easy to say. Yes, residency is not the wonderful life of being a tourist. Ultimately, live where your other family members are. They are your emotional support network. Nobody cares about you like family. One loves their family. If you are away from them, it hurts.

[@zacharykim295]

@@thomaspick4123 damn right

[@WrightBrother83]

My parents are falling for this with the DR. Your American lifestyle doesn’t travel and they think the tourist life translates to being cheap American residents on an island.

[@bristleconepinus2378]

You will always be on the outside. That's the difference between the happy tourist and someone wanting to become a resident. the ice cream/gelato soon wears off.

[@deutschlanddeutschland7111]

fastfood colonialism 😂 pop ate itself

[@mickforever9110]

Life is definitely what you make it ! My wife and I left UK for France at age 50 and 52, didn't speak French or know the area we chose. We have the most perfect life here, and the most amazing friends (mostly French). The language and the system are difficult, but if you put the effort in then things become easier. The French are very patient and accommodating. Go for it, if its rubbish go somewhere else, or back, just remember why you left! 😮 Bonne chance!

[@MeadowDay]

Well done..a big move can be tough in your 50s

[@Here4TheHeckOfIt]

You and your wife sound very adaptable! Enjoy your new life! ❤

[@mickforever9110]

'Adaptable' is probably the most accurate word that I never thought of!! Something we just do in order to move on /succeed etc without even thinking about it🤔. Patience is also key, something 'I' have had to work on😢 Would only change one thing about our move here, wish we had come sooner ❤ Merci, et bonne chance !

[@georgfriedrichhandel4390]

I am an American expat who moved to Europe in 1998 (few Americans at that time were even contemplating leaving the country) so for what it's worth, here is my advice to anyone considering making such a move. Today, with such services as Air B&B, which didn't exist 25 years ago, I recommend that you first live in your destination country for a a few months if that's feasible. As the man in the video stated, it's one thing to visit a nation as a tourist and another to live there for an extended period of time. An extended stay will give you the chance to "go native" (see what it's like to live like the locals do, shop where they shop, eat what they eat and intermingle with then as much as you can). It will also give you a chance to see how affordable it will be to live there permanently and it will help you overcome any culture shock you may experience at the beginning of your stay. Also, if your country of choice is not an English-speaking country, you may want to learn as much of the native language as you can. It will help you integrate into the local culture much quicker and much more seamlessly. I also recommend learning as much about the country you are planning to move to as you can. It will help you learn what you should do and not do before you visit the country. And finally, be as flexible as you can. You may not find all the creature comforts you enjoyed in America. For example, when I moved here, streaming services had not been invented yet and internet service was still very slow (I had to use an ISDN line for the first few years) which meant that certain television programs I used to watch were not available in my new home. And even now, because of the time difference doing simple things like watching the Super Bowl can be challenging. Despite everything, I have never regretted my decision to move here but it may not be a viable option for everyone, That's why I believe an extended stay will help you decide if leaving the United States (or whatever your homeland is) is the right thing for you to do.

[@paulgoebertp]

good advice

[@dtoad5576]

You wrote a whole lot of words and didn't say much

[@georgfriedrichhandel4390]

@@dtoad5576 Then what I wrote obviously went way over your head!

[@SunRabbit]

I moved to Europe on 06.06.1991 after having lived in the US for 27 years. I took the path less travelled and I'm still shocked at how successful my life turned out. I'll never move back to the US because it's not my home anymore and I don't believe in things like imperialism or American supremacism. Besides, everybody I knew back then has either moved out of NYC or died. When I last visited NYC in 2004 it felt like some sterile Earth colony/prison/gulag on Mars. Seriously!

[@georgfriedrichhandel4390]

@@SunRabbit May I ask if you were born in America? And why did you decide to leave? I have never been back since I left and I have no intention of doing so. All that has happened over there since I left only confirms my conviction that I made the right decision.

[@cstaeger]

I would recommend changing one basic perception to all people from the US or Australia: Nobody can move to “Europe”. Europe is a colossal multiverse, and each country is distinct and has dissimilar beauties but introduces new challenges. Please always use the country in Europe you plan to move to! 😇😇

[@mattc9875]

I was born and raised in Italy, lived in the UK/KSA for 1 year and then moved to the US 8 years ago. The perception we Europeans have about Europe is rather insular. When you live out of the EU for many years and then come back just for a visit, although each country is different, it is very clear that there is a major common denominator to all European coutries, and that includes culture and general attitute toward politics, religion, etc. I actually find much more diversity in the US due to the huge century-old immigration from truly all over the world, not to mention the much more open mentality that makes it possible for those who come from abroad to shape the identity of this country. Also, each state here has its own laws with some sharp differences that remarkably influences the way of living of residents, while most European countries have extremely similar legal/political systems with the exception of the UK.

[@adapienkowska2605]

How? European countries have not only different laws but completely different law systems while all USA states are based on common law (even Louisiana, it has some quirks, but the base is still there).

[@dnocturn84]

@@mattc9875 So your European perspective is based on Italy and the UK...? Thats's not even close to call your experience an "European experience". Sorry. I've lived and worked in 6 European countries and visited the rest of them, expept 2 in the EU and 6 outside of the EU, and lived and worked in the US. My perspective is the total opposite in regards to your statement. Culture - yes, there are indeed similarities thoughout Europe. Not very surprising, given our history. But you'll also be able to find so many differences, big and small. The US does deliver a much smaller spectrum of cultures in my experience. The vast majority is colonial European, simplified, watered down and pretty much without any mayor differences across the whole of the US. When it comes to some colorful cultural highlights through migrants, from more diverse and even exotic parts of the world, than there is (almost) nothing that you won't find in Europe as well. Attitude towards politics: maybe I don't exactly get what you want ot say with this one, but in my experience, the US basically knows four major things: conservatism, nationalism (or call it patriotism, if you like that better), commercialism and the Bible. There is no political left whatshowever and they all vote for two political parties, with no real difference between one another. Sorry, but political diversity definitely goes to Europe. Religion: I kind of experienced the US as predominately Christian. Much more Christian believers and much less divers in this regard, than most European countries. And there is no religion, that you won't find in Europe as well. Laws / legal system: You're absolutely wrong on this one. Europe consists of way more different laws and legal systems than the US. I guess you're fooled by the EU, which kind of gives many European countries some kind of "umbrella of a federal law", but every European country still does most things their own way, especially outside of the EU.

[@huskytail]

@@mattc9875 I completely agree about the cultural differences. Europeans think that we are oh so different from each other, while outside of the big language groups that's mostly the one thing that differentiate the countries. The United States are incredibly diverse, Asia too, Europe.. Not so much. There are some differences that slowly are evident when you move north to south but they are not very big. Legally, given how much our systems follow common EU decisions, we basically have a federal system. I can't judge the differences outside of the bigger requirements in the acquis but I doubt many can do it too and compare it to the state legislation in the United States

[@larslosh5598]

@@huskytail No offense but I find this to be an insane statement. Go from Finland to southern Italy. Its like two different planets. Go from Norway to the front line in Ukraine. Its like going from heaven to hell. From Faroe islands to Cyrpus etc etc etc etc etc. I can understand the differences seem fairly small if you go from say, Switzerland to northern italy to France to Luxembourg to Belgium. But keep in mind these countries are spread across an extremely small area comparatively. This entire journey can be completed in a few hours by car and even here you can see quite a bit of cultural variation. Europe is a lot more than the typical tourist destinations. Its incredibly diverse in its full extent, despite its small size.

[@youareinbarbados2578]

I moved to US and lived in Tampa, Florida for 10 years. After that I decided to move back home to Italy. It was an interesting experience living in US, I learned a lot but I still prefer Europe (as bad as is). I found there is no ideal place to live , it's what you find more interesting based on your culture and on your personal interests.

[@bethlehemeisenhour5807]

Europe is the best place to me, I left the states in 78, spent 2 nice years in Germany with my brother and came to Greece in 1980, I like it here, and am a citizen.

[@LeMerch]

I lived in Florida, California, Ireland and Germany over the last 45 years. Europe is safer, better standard of life and tends to have a more sophisticated culture in parts but the US has incredible vibrancy that’s unmatched. It’s hard saying 1 is better, both are incredible in their own right. Ireland felt like home to me for some reason.. especially because the people there are so warm.

[@RS__7]

@@LeMerch New York, LA and Miami is vibrant I guess but a lot of cities in America are really dead...you don't see many people walking the streets of their cities outside the big tourist mega cities like New York and LA.... Probably because American cities are built for automobiles....I was in a pretty big America city Columbus, Ohio I didn't see a soul walking the streets. You will see more people in a small market town or village in the UK

[@BigSmallTravel]

Living in Italy now in the city. Italian cities have a good quality of life and generally much safer than American cities. Much more civility in Italian cities as well.

[@letsdomath1750]

Is your handle an Abdullah reference?

[@Lea-rb9nc]

Sixteen years ago I moved to France from my native California. There are no regret. Thank you France 🇫🇷 for welcoming me home. I have no desire to be anywhere else. ❤❤❤

[@glennshoemake4200]

As an American who moved to Barcelona in 2005, I had some of the same experiences, especially with the noise outside during the summer. The neighborhood that I live in has a Fiesta Major that lasts 10 days straight in August with super loud music until 3am. All in all the increased job security, great public medical, better healthier food and much lower crime rate offset the inconveniences. My wife is Catalan so I didn't have any issues living and working in Spain.

[@glennshoemake4200]

@Soy un señor i lived in Atlanta for 5 years with my wife and you would always hear about people getting killed in Atlanta. My wife was scared to go outside alone, but the truth is Atlanta has a very large metro area that is around 100 miles and violent crime was quite common that when I left in 2005 they were debating if normal citizens who had a license to carry a gun be allowed to carry it into a public restaurant because people were getting violently robbed when going out. In Barcelona there is a lot of nonviolent crime, car windows getting broken into at night or bags/ wallets stolen if you are not careful, but there is almost no violent crime here.

[@ChrissieSM]

@@soyunsenor4665, of course the crime rate is a lot lower. You have to remember that the vast majority of people do not have guns.

[@ChrissieSM]

@@soyunsenor4665 , ok, but you cannot kill like a madman with a machine gun in the US.

[@Alejojojo6]

By home has the same issue. What do I do? I go on holidays those 10 days

[@deborahriley7355]

We left Indiana almost 2years ago and came in blind faith to Albania. We're in our 70's. We're very happy with everything: the house we bought, the people, the friendships, the beauty, the prices.... it takes a while to adjust to a totally different culture, people language. We feel well adjusted now and for us everything fell into place. We love Albania

[@shaclo1512]

wow nice to hear. How did you end up in Albania? I mean it‘s a beautiful country but not many people retire there… Are you on the coast?

[@alsteeves2044]

That's impressive to do that in your 70,s😊

[@deborahriley7355]

Yes we're near the coast on a hillside near durres. We wanted to not have to be vaccinated and most of Albania is unvaccinated and statistics are much better here, very few deaths comparatively. Americans are allowed one year visa. We bought a house and can stay 5 years, then we renew it

[@saullandiof5768]

respect! that's a brave move

[@monkeyseemonkeydo2597]

@@deborahriley7355I was considering moving to Italy or Portugal but you’ve given me the idea to explore Albania. I’m a single retired Canadian woman - any advice would be most welcome. Thank you.

[@brianh9358]

I lived in Japan for 3 years and left the tourist phase pretty quickly. I liked Japan but began to see the difficulties of living there almost immediately. I can say I really enjoyed the time I spent living and working in Japan but I reached a point where I knew I could never live there permanently. I had to come up against my own limitations and of course the acceptance of the Japanese culture itself. I would never be Japanese. :) However, I did end up marrying a Japanese woman so I brought a bit of Japan back with me. We have been married for 30 years now.

[@aaronfitzgerald9109]

Yeah but non whites can say that, soo as a white say ....... can't be German or Irish etc we are "racist"

[@Bezimienny1598]

@@aaronfitzgerald9109 Are you confusing telling someone that they can't be German or Irish because of race with deciding for yourself that the culture of a given country is simply just not for you?

[@valgaart_serindard0662]

Pfff... An international element trampling over existing people's and cultures. Insulting.

[@haga2519]

Interesting. You had a problem with Japan but your wife was more willing to try out a different culture. For 30 years, no less.

[@spacechannelfiver]

Complete opposite experience from me, married a Japanese woman that I met in the UK and we've been together a similar amount of time as you guys. Whenever we visit i'm always first and foremost part of the family although my 8 year old niece is convinced i'm stupid and tries to babysit me.

[@jorgeruiz9412]

As someone who immigrated to North America many years ago, I am always surprised when people visit my country and come back asking me "what possessed me to leave my country". And the reason is that it is one thing being a tourist, and a completely different thing being a resident, like many here have said. As tourists we visit curated areas that are designed to look great, provide a good experience and make you love the place. But you don't have to deal with the annoyances of the local culture and how, generally badly, the place is run. You don't have to deal with local authorities to request services, or contractors or local service providers. Usually everything takes a long time, is not well done and requires a lot of patience and follow up. And it is those little annoying things that taken together drains you and make you try another place. I find it very common with north americans to get excited with foreign places, and I think it is because most of them do not travel enough, and when they do they stay for just a few days and somehow they idealize the place. These guys seem to have the means to do trial and error so I am pretty sure they will find the place that feels right for them, but they could have saved troubles and money if they did not start as committed to the place.

[@swingboutique]

Very interesting topic. I'm from Prague originally, have lived all over the world and now reside in a small town in Central Florida. Every couple of years I get a wave of homesickness for the beauty and mystery of my native city. Then I spend a few weeks there and when I get back home I think to myself: God bless America :) Yes, everything is more beautiful in Prague, the food is much better but the level of comfort and service we take for granted in N America is simply non-existent there. I also find Americans far more accepting and less petty, and daily life less cumbersome. But give me two years and I'll regain my rose-colored, memory-saturated glasses and will head back to the old continent again

[@dani7000]

Hello. I'm Daniel from Argentina. I've seen your first video when my daughter and I were ready to go to Italy searching for a new beginning (I'm 49). The things were not well and finally we used the return ticket 20 days later, something not spected at first. Many conclusions I could learn from this experience : -The ideals and the reality could be so far one of each other. -The tourist and the resident eyes are totally different. -The place, doesn't matter it's beautifully, wouldn't resolve our internal necessities. -There must be at least one clear and strong reason to leave from our place. -The place qualities are very important, the proper 'place in the world' may be not easy to find. -The 'collective unconscious' is different in every place. -Each person has a history, a background, a place in the society and cannot be eliminated. -There must be at least something in your favor: a family member, a friend (or at least someone to meet with certain affinity), a house, a job, the complete legal documentation, or a lot of money to try, discover and find your place without pressure. Otherwise, you will feel too alone, like an E.T. :) -An stranger will be an stranger ever. -It may be possible that your local reality be most than acceptable and convenient. -There are no rules, every single person and stories are unique. -Apparently bad situations are the most convenient to learn a lot. -Self-inflicted suffering is not a good option (is stupid I think). -While we are alive.... is not all said. I decided to return home, take some distance (with my money saved :), process the situation and study a better way to live. Appreciating my current reality also. And in the future... who knows? Best regards. (apologies for the mistakes).

[@jacopofbargellini4005]

an argentinian guy not finding Italy a nice place to stay is quite unusual.....

[@minxyx1007]

sorry you didnt find a place to call home in italy....sending good luck wishes from Florence

[@jacopofbargellini4005]

@@minxyx1007 My hometown...❤

[@reneee4314]

Thank you for this writing-it is a very good explanation of what many experience but do not summarize so well.

[@e.r.4077]

This is such a good comment. It does come down to appreciating your reality, wherever you wind up. And your reasoning that we must have (at least) one strong reason for making the move is truly helpful. People often have enough freedom to make the move, but in the end, no good reason to be where they go. Thanks.

[@RobertoCapodieci]

I spent 18 years in Italy, 12 years in USA, and now 18 in Indonesia. I understand what it means to adapt to another culture, other standards, and other rules. No offense meant, as it did happen to me as well: living (let alone being born and growing up) in the USA easily render a person more entitled, it makes it easy to take so many things for granted, and detach a person from which is the reality in the rest of the world. Changing life drastically is not easy, but if we do it in a humble way, if we let go of all that we find "annoying" or wrong, due to how we see things, we may be surprised by the marvels hidden behind the cultural curtain we set up when we arrive in a new place

[@BeneaththeSurfaceYT]

Well put. I appreciate your words.

[@celinapenteado1556]

You couldn’t have said it any better.

[@YogaBlissDance]

@Hanííbą́ą́z Interesting comment but hey spent much of thier lives, marriage children in the U.S. I think that's more relevant.

[@alexisurban4473]

An insightful, lovely comment. Truely.

[@AnnabelleJARankin]

Good video. I am British and live on Gozo, Malta. Lovely place but super hot and noisy at times (very high humidity, fireworks), and the people are culturally different - not 'super' friendly but speak English (very helpful!). But for me it sure beats the madness of the US (where I also lived for 2 years) where crime is endemic, there is a very insular attitude about the country, and citizens can carry guns!

[@dmorris61]

Weird. We re-located to live in France in 2017 and everything was perfect. No problems with anything. Chose where we wanted to go in the South on the coast next to the Spanish border and have not looked back. Feeling sorry for you guys. We got all we wanted and more. I guess we were lucky. Always happy to talk about these kind of experiences. I speak French which is why I wouldn't settle in Spain despite the warmer weather.

[@conradbrady7305]

I know this sounds weird, but I would love to chat over the phone. I have so many questions about France that I’ve wanted an insider point of view on. Idk how to give my number without publicly revealing it.

[@dmorris61]

@@conradbrady7305 we are heading back arrive 21st and could do a zoom around then. Happy to chat then?

[@mickforever9110]

My wife and I left UK for France too, at 50 and 52yrs old, don't regret it one bit! We didn't speak French and didn't know anything about the area we live in. The french are amazing, helpful people, the language, and their system are difficult but they are good teachers and very patient. Life is what you make it, and so very short at best! I would say go for it, if its not what you thought go somewhere else, or go back, just remember why you left in the first place😢. Bonne chance!

[@SphynxEgo]

They moved with the American conceptions (same as the British) high expectations as in we have the money , we are Americans and all will come to our special needs, and when the culture , values and the live style of the place hits them , is a show to watch !! I am telling you !? I work in hospitality and tourism industry , the amount of this people type I have seen in my 20y work exp. is beyond any imagination !!

[@mcpt4196]

As a portuguese citizen i can assure you that living in the historic centers is awesome for young people, specially for students. Even elders are moving out (some pushed out) from centers. Big cities like Braga, Porto, Aveiro, Coimbra (if you prefer the north of Portugal) are places to avoid if you prefer a more soft environment. Always go for the suburb areas, always!

[@campas7182]

A few notes as a random portuguese guy randomly brought by the KZbin algorithm. There's always a huge difference between visiting a place and living in said place, something you seem to have underestimated at first. Also a lot of the issues you're facing are more of a Portugal problem than a Europe problem. Coimbra isn't just a student town, it's THE student town. It's the oldest university in the country and it's where student culture and tradition was born. Those graduation parties / parades attract university students from all over the country and it always gets crazy. To top it off, COVID shut down all these kinds of events for 2 years so people are going even harder now that they're back. The whole place is entirely transformed during these so if you're unaware of the history you'll be caught off guard by how hard the partying is at the previously quiet pituresque town. The partying is almost as crazy at the start of the university year, so if you're in Portugal for the next couple weeks and want to sleep you should probably avoid Coimbra. Summer, specially August, is a great time to visit but possibly the worst time to settle into Portugal. We have a huge tradition of local fests and festivals, and those are mostly summer events. Not only that, there's a huge diaspora throughout Europe that typically comes back home around this time, so everything is even busier. Great to hang out and have fun, but not great if you need to get something done. At one point one of you is complaining that it's 2am and people are still out, that's normal in Portugal. It's not uncommon to bar hop at 2-3am and end the night at 5 or 6am, specially for students or young adults on weekends/vacations/days off. There's a bit of a paradox on your requirements for an ideal place. You want access to a load of different restaurants and interesting places, but also want somewhere peaceful and quiet. With how centralized Portugal is, that is hard to find. Pretty much every quiet little town has a good restaurant or place to hang out, but that's typically it, you won't find a lot of variety. If you want variety, you'll have to be on busier places. Quiet places at a reasonable distance from restaurants and events do exist, but are usually pricey (since you looking into Sintra and Cascais I'm sure you've found that) Sorry if my comment comes off as exceedingly critical, this was a great video and I enjoyed it. Best of luck finding your perfect spot, whether it might be in Portugal or elsewhere.

[@BeneaththeSurfaceYT]

Thank you. Wonderful and very candid comment. Really appreciate your detailed feedback. I think this could be helpful to a lot of people.

[@lassehaggman]

Yes. Like the flimsy doors and windows, the noise and the cold in winter. That is a Southern Europe thing.

[@ElisaAvigayil]

Your English is awesome.

[@annaalexandria]

@@lassehaggman exactly. if you want good doors and windows, warm houses in the winter, and no noise in the street past 2am - try Sweden. But it's cold and hard to get into a social circle. Also, trying to get things done in August in the south of Europe... I think all Europeans know that's a recipe for being frustrated haha.

[@campas7182]

@@ElisaAvigayil Thanks

[@MyNameGoesRightHere]

As a southern European I can guarantee that if you get a condo or an apartment in the old part of any bigger city, you will always have to contend with noise, dirt and partying. It seems you guys need to live in a more residential area (meaning a nice suburb) that is not a desert (it has stores and places to eat) and is well connected to the city center. This is how you will be able to enjoy the amazing southern lifestyle without going crazy. I hope this helps.

[@panapana4854]

I can confirm the same for living in the central area of cities in northern Europe as well. When you want to live where life is brimming then you have to live with the side effects.

[@LewdProductions]

Here in Spain is the same issue. The city centres are for partying, stores and restaurants... If you want to live there you'll have to take it into account, or properly isolate the sound in the apartment.

[@mimmiblu6138]

Same in Italy. So I live not in Milan itself, but in a leafy suburb connected to the centre by the underground which, being Italy such an old country, is a beautiful old town with a canal and sorrounding park designed by Leonardo da Vinci and quite a few aperitivo bars and pretty restaurants in the town centre, but not too much noise. I like it here, but it does not come cheap and houses like the ones you showed in your video would cost you an arm and a leg.

[@danielefabbro822]

Same here in Italy. Due to the fact we have welcomed a lot of immigrants we now living an unique experience of coexistence with different cultures that is not always pleasant or happy. Especially the youngest, they seems attracted by crimes and illegal stuff, so our police forces are always running up and down to stop them. It's a shame considering that their parents, immigrants too, are good people that works hard to become good citizens or at least to integrate themselves in our society. And then these kids just ruins all their efforts. There was also opposite cases when Muslim families have murdered their daughters just to avoid them to go to school and deny them education. The father of that girl escaped and right now is in some God-forgotten hole in Middle Orient. Trying to hide from us. But soon or later justice will be done. Except for that, we have a lot of old villages that are empty because people is moving away to find jobs elsewhere in other countries. So if foreigners wants to move here, they have just to buy the house, recover it and then they will have a nice place where to live. Of course there are scammers, but... I mean, when you see a house that normally will cost you 100k € on sale for 1€... You must figure it out that it's not a deal, but instead the house is a mess. It's implicit. "Comprehensive in the price" as we say in Italy. Except for that, Italy as like Spain, Portugal, Greece, Albania, Slovenia, Croatia, South France and few other places are perfect places where to live happily. Maybe burocracy is something of a problem, but the quality of life is high enough to let this pass in second place once you are well adapted here.

[@veejayroth]

As a Central European I fully endorse this message and confirm its wvalidity in this part of the continent as well.

[@brownfang3547]

Having spent a month exploring Portugal in 2021, I applaud your bravado. I also appreciate how grounded this video is, with no superlatives of promotion or complaint. This peek into your experience is refreshingly unadorned. Thanks for that. We found the country generally wonderful, with quality of life challenges that were sometimes great. From Porto to Lisbon, Marvao to the coast we found a lot of beauty. Ultimately, we decided that SoCal had spoiled us too much to fully embrace a permanent move. We do miss Continente and the feel of the people. We don't miss the lack of sugar or pervasive central air conditioning. As a typical, ugly American, I speak only English and found it incredibly generous that the Portuguese were patient with my bumbling attempts at their language. I hope your Spanish helps you navigate the tongue. Of course, life is what you make it, wherever you are. So, I wish you and your love a beautiful, successful Portuguese adventure.

[@kaunas88]

I think that they are looking for the perfect place to live, which is very hard to find. I suspect that they will find Paris to have the following problems: to expensive, too crowded/ rushed/ stressful, too cold, not friendly enough, etc.

[@Meowmeter]

As a Portuguese I find it curious that the points you found negative are pretty much what we enjoy most and make us who we are… especially after two years of confinement, but from what I hear we’re still much quieter than our Iberian neighbours and much more contained than our Brazilian cousins😊 … mostly we’re about family and community, eating, drinking, dancing, celebrating, and needing no excuse to have a street festa… in that sense, being in a city with a university, those factors are tremendously exacerbated.. particularly Coimbra which is the hub of university life and carries a great historical and cultural tradition when it comes to academia life… you’d do much better living in the countryside, or a town with lesser population… my hometown is quaint, quiet and quite charming, yet it’s only 20 min away from our capital, Lisbon… everything you need is at arm’s reach…but beware… we have festas during Easter, patron saint’s day, August is chaotic and Christmas too… Portugal is definently not for everyone, great for visiting, but living takes real patience, but I suppose it’s pretty much the same everywhere we go, where customs and culture are different from our own.. good luck and best wishes 🙏🏻

[@Tininha369]

I am also Portuguese and live in Portugal 3 months if the year. I live in a peaceful, beautiful villa. You should have done your research before you bought your apartment rather talk negative about my country. When you choose to live in cities then you have to expect a certain amount of noise.

[@denniszenanywhere]

Your comment reminds me of a video of someone from Japan who complained about the noise in some cities in the Philippines. They're the same noise Portuguese people find normal. And need I say that Portuguese explorer Magellan discovered the Philippines?! 😀

[@TheNahual1]

Agree...mediterranean culture one best in the world for happy living and not pretty good qol

[@AITreeBranches]

I was really wondering where in Europe. WTF is with that title? The shocking reality of moving to Europe? If they'd move to Germany the police will be at they're door because they vacum the house at 21:00 pm and so on. What I find shocking is that they see Europe as a country, of course you will be disappointed, there are 44 countries, each one of them are a different society. Love Portugal, greatings from Romania.

[@AITreeBranches]

@@jpdseara Not for South-East European countries, we have a struggle to adapt to the Nordic countries everytime we are visiting. I don't know if you're catching my point, is about differences between European countries. You cannot generalise a continent as you'll have unreal expectations.

[@ninobk196]

I really appreciate your video. I have been to Portugal 5 times and I'm still not sold. One thing I want to say is that it's way too much pressure on yourself to try to find a forever home and city. You just need a place to land that is "good enough". That you like enough to live for 1 year while you keep exploring. It's such a huge move, that a "soft landing" is the most you should aspire for. Anything above that is just too much pressure. Find a place that is strategic and well connected like Porto or Lisbon and dedicate 1 year to travel around the country. Rent airbnbs in on the weekends in different places and see if you like the vibe. I met an older gentlemen in Lisbon who told me it took him ~5 years to figure out where he wanted to purchase a house. I believe it! Portugal is a beautiful country IMO. Easiest to move to but I haven't found it's groove. I'm from Brooklyn NY. I don't expect PT to be like BK, but we can't negate that we are molded very much by our environment and our senses are triggered by those things we are familiar with. I, for one realized that Portugal as beautiful as it is, is good enough for my next chapter. It has a food culture, beautiful beaches, etc. Will it be my "forever" place...maybe or maybe not. I'm okay with either of these. It just has to work for my next chapter. We will move to Lisbon and stay there for 1 year while we explore the country and see where we want to live more long term. Where we can also develop a community because that is a huge deal for us. The only stress for now is the paperwork and finding a place in Lisbon (we know we don't want to live in the city full time but we like it enough to live there temporarily and use it as our jumping off point to other areas of the country) and that is challenging in itself. Now, trying to find an actual city to live in would be too much to try to do during a visit. One can do a process of elimination with short stays, but you really need to stay somewhere a bit longer to get its vibe, meet people, etc. I've lived in 5 countries. When you are a foreigner, every single day has so many little challenges that rarely one can finish a day without a certain level of stress. Unkown little challenges that add up, ie. can't read the food label, what store can I buy this or that, will they take a credit card?, learning a new language, how does the drier work, how do I speak to someone on the phone w/o knowing the language, trying to trouble shoot something, how do we meet new people, how do I pay a bill, which ATM is better, etc. etc. etc. It really is endless. Literally every single thing you do, even how to regulate the temperature in the shower, is a whole process. Before you would never have to think about them so they were never part of your daily decisions. All these little things require energy and t's exhausting and enough to deal with on its own. My recommendation is to find a place that you like "enough" to call home "temporarily", get a lease so you can apply for your visa, and just keep exploring neighborhoods and cities. Trying to figure out a forever place is too much to add on to just living the day to day in a new country. Having a home will give you a "constant", while dealing with all the little challenges that take up more energy than usual compared to when you were back home and just operated on autopilot. There's no rush. You're playing a long game here. You left the rat race. Relax and give yourself time to settle in. I hope this helps. Abrazos.

[@murielle2009]

Great editing work, I enjoy your videos for their content and the way they are put together. Keep up the great work!

[@acooksla]

We moved to Spain the from the states two years ago and never looked back. We chose to rent for now which gives us total freedom. So far, so good.

[@bethb5915]

Great points, @NinoBK ! Thank you

[@minoozolala]

Exactly. I’ve lived out of country the past 28 years, in two different countries. I still feel the stress of being a foreigner. Most days are a normal routine but whenever something goes wrong, there’s the added stress of the language (even though I’m pretty fluent), who to contact, etc., etc. Covid lockdowns were a big relief cuz for the first time I didn’t have any stress at all - luxury! I’ve grown to feel at home here but one is always reminded in the little things that one is not a native.

[@mallorygraf8574]

@ninobk Best advice ever! 🙌🙌

[@8House]

"We are not easy to please." Thanks for admitting it.

[@Bruintjebeer6]

Living somewhere is totally different than being on vacation It ask for a totally different mindset

[@theantiquemystique]

I am Aussie and in 1992 packed up on a one way ticket, no cash no work and off to Portugal. Found work, found a roof ended up living there for 15 years. Love that Country, people, food, lifestyle...love it all.

[@ferchodiaz684]

Where are you from?

[@aliaflow6877]

​@Fernando Diaz duude he literally said he's Australian in the comment

[@tombristowe846]

That is a really interesting essay on the psychology of moving. I often daydream about living somewhere more exciting, exotic, with better weather than where I am, east England, but in truth so many things tie me here that I can see that if I went somewhere wonderful I might have an amazing view.....but then what ? Like most people my life is made of small boring details and commitments, friendships built up over decades, small pleasures, but predictable ones and the reassuring familiarity of of a place I know so well. I think if you're young you have a good chance of making a go of it, though you still need to be a pioneer at heart. I admire you both for giving it a go in your fifties and for being open about it.

[@alexvlasny9755]

My ex used to say, “After 2 months living in NewYork is exactly like living in Peoria, Illinois”. Our problems are not in the locations!

[@tombristowe846]

@@alexvlasny9755 Caelum non animum mutant, qui trans mare currunt. They change their skies, not their souls, who rush across the sea. Horace; 65 to 8 BC.

[@michellecohron3425]

And I dream of moving to England!

[@alexvlasny9755]

@@tombristowe846 that wonderful!

[@sararichardson737]

@@michellecohron3425 as a Brit living abroad, I’d say wait awhile, there is a lot of tumult going on in the UK right now

[@krysb.1060]

Thanks guys. It takes a lot of guts to be so vulnerable in front of thousands of people. My hat goes off to you!

[@geedus71]

As someone who left the UK for Italy back in the 90s this certainly rings true! Culture shock comes in stages, as you point out. My experience pointed out 5 levels: 1. Honeymoon; you're basically still a tourist, curious, stimulated, excited. 2. Distress; cultural and linguistic differences start to make you feel confused, isolated or inadequate. 3. Re-integration; frustration and hostility to differences, unfavourable comparisons with home culture. 4. Autonomy; you start to accept differences based on familiarity and experience. 5. Independence; you value the local culture and have the potential to deal with all kinds of situations. How long does all that take? It depends on a lot of factors; your job, your social circle, your attitude and open-mindedness and VERY importantly your language learning. There's no way you can feel comfortable living long-term in a host nation if you don't speak the local language. Good luck!

[@sararichardson737]

Great blog. I’m a Londoner fetched up in a Mexican ranchito on the pacific coast. I wasn’t looking for it but it found me: a room (what a room 6 sided and huge) around which I built a home. I’ve been here 13 years now and I call it my heavenly refuge. Beautiful beaches (surfable) no bars no restaurants, friendly simple and gracious locals. I’ve never been happier. I had no idea I would ever fetch up. In a locale like this in a country I’d never even thought much about. So far so blessed. Wishing you both Bon viajes!

[@sheilacollins9384]

What I learned from this video is what I know in my life here (my little home in Wisconsin): the world is problem after problem after problem. Problems never end. I have come to the conclusion that happiness is not found in any particular place - but right straight deep in one's own heart. But maybe it takes spinning the wheel some more, continuing to move - until finally you just STOP.

[@barrywhite5502]

Like the menominee river fishing and eating in Amberg some good walleye. My aunt lived there 70 years and owned piggly wiggly.

[@sheilacollins9384]

@@barrywhite5502 Wo! In two weeks I'm headed to a cabin in Amberg for a wedding! What a strange coincidence of commenting. I've never been there before. Now you have given me a bit of history, Barry 🙂

[@barrywhite5502]

@@sheilacollins9384 You're welcome. Amberg is beautiful,especially near the falls.

[@adamleddy9894]

No life is experience after experience, overcoming challenges… having the strength to tolerate failure, learning from it and growing… Experiencing life as a problem is a potential problem. Trust me I am now living in my fourth culture and language in my life… I have failed plenty and prospered from it… You can’t look at the perspective of 6 months or 1 year… 3 to 5 years just to get comfortable… 5-8 years to immerse and assimilate I’ve met people who say they lived overseas for 6 months or a year and think that’s a real achievement… and to a certain extent it is… truly settling and staying and building a future much more difficult and requires commitment…

[@maryr7593]

@sheila collins just wondering where in Wisconsin? I'm in Madison (another party college town)...I was a student here too 30+ yrs ago...and it was loud then. I lived in Lisbon as a student 30+ yrs ago...became fluent in Portuguese and still speak, understand, etc. Been considering PT as a destination...never in a million years would I have ever thought...well if you can't use portuguese for a career at least I could use it in retirement. But that's exactly what I'm pondering. I know for sure though...I wouldn't want to live in Lisbon even though it has everything at your fingertips. Figuring out a location is difficult though...in your elder years, things to consider, etc. I'm amazed how much interest there is in PT but the huge advertising campaign and now lots of youtube videos, etc. For the Portuguese who commented...the enthusiasm that folks are showing to go to PT, etc..I often think it is like sending sending the animals in for slaughter...one can never be prepared for the endless paperwork, regulation, 'nothing is ever quick or easy when it comes to getting things done in PT. But I agree with the Spanish guy who commented about the rich ppl who expected everyone to cater to their linguistic needs...I can see that happening already for those who already moved.

[@predictorbibulous3327]

I admire your measured approach to not settling and making sure you love where you end up. Not many people get that opportunity.

[@Ada-qw8lo]

There is not one Perfect place on earth. Someone told me years ago that the place you live is not what makes you happy. Happiness comes from within you. Your attitude towards life is what makes you happy no matter where you live. As always, great video!

[@cleonawallace376]

I'm not sure that it's ever clear!! I moved to Italy from the UK, somewhat accidentally back in 2001, and met my now husband, who had moved here from Ireland the year before. We tried moving 'back' to both UK and Ireland for short periods, but it never felt right. Then after 18 years in Rome, we moved to rural Umbria. I love it mostly, and I love that are custodians of a beautiful piece of land, but at the same time many things about Italy drive me crazy... the extreme planning restrictions, extra cost of everything for foreigners and many other things, and also I worry about my kids and their own sense of national identity. I also worry about climate change and whether our summers here will become even hotter. For me though, I have lived most of my adult life here, so though I will never be Italian, I also wouldn't really fit in in the UK any more!

[@trips505]

i resonate with this. I am canadian but have grown up in asia, and many times I question if I even am Canadian and truly belong here.

[@flexiveganc7441]

a okay understand and a good message. (because me i maybe wnana go to italy). but still dont know how (financiel). so in mean time i try to be a person who helps protect climate. for example eat no meat. travel by bycicle or train. God is with you and you are home everywhere. take care

[@thaijose1]

You people shoud stay home. You move to others people country make everything more expensive for locals and never happy hear. GO HOME.

[@jfox9126]

My dad was English. He moved to California in his twenties where he met my mom and I was born. He went back to the UK only a couple times after that. He said he felt the same way - that England could not really feel like home after so many years because so much had changed while he was away.

[@natalillabot7772]

@@thaijose1 desde cuando tú tienes que decirle a la gente lo que tienen que hacer con sus vidas? Jajajajaja qué horror!

[@albertlay8927]

No matter what country you're moving to, it shouldn't be a surprise that the inner cities are way more louder than the residential areas. Expats tend to look for a house in those inner cities, because of the old and quaint neighborhoods and streets and buildings etc. And then they find out, like described in this video, that life is happening right at your doorstep, under your bedroom window. It's like living near an airport runway because you like to watch airplanes, and then complain about the noise of those airplanes. Anyway, look for a house outside the city center. They're cheaper and more comfortable.

[@a_new_life_41]

As a multi-year expat (though I got grounded back in the US when covid hit & then in taking care of family), I totally relate to your search for a forever or at least long-long-term home. Thanks for the honesty and sharing your journey - at least I know I'm not alone. Wishing you the best in your search, and regardless, it will always be an adventure.

[@lanehartwell]

If I might offer some advice...be careful about moving around too much. It can burn you out and leave you feeling like the grass is greener elsewhere all the time, or there is no green grass, anywhere, at all. My husband and I are roughly the same age as you, and we have moved to nine different US cities in the past 14 years trying to figure out where "home" is. We don't have family we are close to, and we don't have close friends. Sometimes we have moved for jobs, but in the past five years my husband has been working remotely and I can't see that ever changing at this point. So for us, it's about affordability, quality of life, crime, health care and climate change. We had to leave the west and move east to find those things, but it still doesn't feel like home to me and I miss the west. I also don't feel like the USA is home anymore, and while I am also a Canadian citizen, the places I feel at home in are too expensive. So my advice to you is find a place close to your kids, because family will give you a reason and purpose to be somewhere. I get the sense that you are feeling a bit adrift, and that's not a great place to be emotionally. I wish you well, and look forward to seeing your next steps.

[@reneee4314]

Well said, all. thank you for posting

[@acooksla]

I think you need to do what’s best for you when you are older, and let your kids live their own lives. We moved to Spain two years ago and have made many friends now and feel we will stay around them as they are family for us. The US. Is over in my opinion. Too much crime, healthcare is a disaster and it’s so expensive that anywhere you want to be you can’t afford. We also moved a lot in the states and are now happy to settle here.

[@phranceshinch253]

The message you have is wonderful. I just turned 50 this year I live in New youth and I spent 2.5 months in the Adriatic Sea (not my first in Europe) as my present for myself-but since I returned I have become unsettled Many questions which mainly was where and what do I want in life after 50- your message is truly helpful -so thank u

[@mariaa.9952]

If I may simply add that, if you are thinking of returning to 🇨🇦 ….DON’T. This country is in the 🚽 literally, socially and especially economically, they’re impoverishing the middle class by the minute. Worst of all, it’s moving FAST into a soc!@I cred!t system like 🇨🇳 and no one is realizing it. The 🇺🇸 will most likely be the last bastion of hope for Liberty on 🌍, keep exploring there! Seek you shall will find 👍. If I could, I would leave this heIIh0Ie too, but alas…not possible. Best of Luck!

[@ms1295]

Which cities in the US you’ve liked the most so far? ( even if it’s not ideal). Looking to move out of CA but not sure where to settle

[@jrhamp]

Having lived in Spain for some years..and now in Florida, one can appreciate the challenges of living abroad. Issues of language and resourcing critical "living" components is always an ongoing daily challenge. Knowing this upfront makes life alittle easier. I have traveled thru Portugal a number of times. My favorite area would be around Lagos in the Algarve. Faro has the airport with Ryan Air and visits to Spain further south are closer than Porto or other cities in the north. I speak decent Spanish, so one can "fit" in to some degree. But, I always realized as an expat that once a foreigner, always a foreigner. In the smaller communities outside the main cities (more room with land, etc as compared to high rise apt or condo living), one does get closer to the locals and develop a friendship to some degree. I was overseas some 17 years working the wars and traveled to just about everyplace. I found there is not "perfect" location. In closing, the old adage.."it is not where you are, but who you are there with". Buena suerte!

[@acooksla]

Wow, we moved to Spain two years ago and can’t imagine going back to the states. You must have had a really good reason to return. We have many friends here and even though we are foreigners we feel at home.

[@MartianInDisguise]

why did you move back to the States?

[@cognome555]

Expat=immigrant

[@tilsa1478]

Maybe the problem is that when you're middle aged you have a past that weighs and it's not like when you're young & thirsty for new experiences, light as a feather for the wind to take you anywhere. So inevitably you start comparing the new with the old so that's why you're finding it difficult to adjust to a nomadic life. When we get older we like to be with the family we created so we tend to feel lonely when that aspect is missing. Thanks for your enlightening videos ! From a porteña !...

[@DadgeCity]

Nice and honest. I can empathise because I moved from England to Hungary, and no matter how open-minded and tolerant one is, and how nice the new place and people are, there are always a few itches and glitches that won't go away. This doesn't mean that one is being arrogant or ungrateful, just realistic about one's own comfort and happiness. (I did move back to England but sometimes I regret it!)

[@BeneaththeSurfaceYT]

Yup, absolutely right. People mistake going after what you want with being picky and unhappy. Not at all! Go for what you want, I say... with full force! It's your life. You get to choose what you want out of it.

[@ligbzd837]

People get confused with the "vacation" experience to "home" experience. Home is by default more boring and routine. Vacation by default is an exciting, fun, and new experience. You can have a stable home in a stable and quiet place, while traveling "elsewhere" to get that excitement, fun, and new experience. There is no need to go through the hassles of moving to another place for an "exciting, fun, and new experience" because as soon as you make that "place" your home, it will soon become boring and routine. Now, you are back to square one...

[@BrawndoQC]

Yeah only reason to move to another country as I did is if you prefer it more than your old place. I'm Canadian living in Yucatan, Mexico for 18 years, I'm happy here. I'm going to Europe (France and Netherlands) for vacations in 1 weeks but I don't want to move there.

[@aldozilli1293]

EXACTLY BEST COMMENT HERE

[@beckypetersen2680]

I wish I could put a LOVE under this comment. It seems like the reason they wanted to leave their beautiful home was to look for excitement and change up their boring life back in the USA. But life isn't all one big exciting moment after moment. It's full of basically boring days and nights. I, however, am one who wants the so-called 'boring' days so I can explore my interests and time to do creative things. I've never been one to need that kind of excitement as I can take trips and museums and such for that kind of entertainment. Maybe this couple is actually looking for something else - something deeper.

[@ChocoParfaitFra]

Exactly!!

[@lioneldemun6033]

You just described the difference between hobby experience and job experience. Transforming a hobby into a job kills all the joy and passion imho

[@christophdenner8878]

I don't know when moving to Portugal has become such a strong trend among American early retirees. In any case, what happens is that property prices are spiraling up due to this trend, so that locals are struggling more and more with finding affordable housing/apartments. Portugal is one of the lowest income countries in the EU and cities like Lisbon and Porto have already become very expensive. This trend is concerning and fueled by the Portuguese government's decision to not tax foreigners for a period of 10 years (if I'm correct). Talking to Portuguese, I learned that people are already getting fed up by this trend, which is no surprise at all.

[@anneofgreengables1619]

I've heard the same. It's driving up prices for the local people making things very expensive.

[@reneee4314]

Thank you for posting this!!

[@elianajesus8457]

Thank you for mentioning this, right now it's practically impossible even for the middle class to buy a tinny apartment in those areas....and at the same time the country doesn't promote economic stimulation and services on the rural areas so people are really stuck with no options :/ currently the beauty of Portugal is reserved for the rich and outsiders only.

[@akanehone1434]

Thank you for this. Younger generations aren't capable of moving out of their parents houses til late 20s because of this. It's just impossible to find an affordable place, really feels like we're being held back. I'm not even talking about purchasing a house/apartment, I'm talking about renting - minimum wage is roughly 700, that's the average rental price for pretty much any roof. Let alone building a family and having kids, when your minimum wage just covers the rent.

[@christophdenner8878]

@@akanehone1434 I'm so sorry to hear this, it must be very hard getting started and moving out of your parents' place when you're in your 20ies. You know, I also thought about moving to Portugal in the future - I'm a European and currently working in Switzerland, but when I hear about the situation in Portugal, I think I have no right to move there and further ruin the local property market. You see the same development allover Europe, prices moving to crazy highs.

[@Pthommie]

One thing I learned living in France was to avoid the city center & live in the second or third rings surrounding les centre villes. There you're close enough to participate in the nightlife but far enough away to enjoy a relatively quiet evening. Other advantages: larger stores with lower prices, more open space & lower rents.

[@Highlander-in-France-yu5iu]

Awesome channel and I can relate to everything. My wife and I are also in our 50s and looking to relocate to Europe in France. We've spent 6 months in France this year without moving just to visit as many cities as possible. Even after that amount of time, I'm still only about 75% sure of where I want to live. Your vids are so accurate. Thanks for sharing.

[@lauradobb8819]

OMG, this rings so true for us, so cathartic, thank you! We are Canadians who love the nature of our birth country but never felt like we belonged. On my husband’s PhD scholarship, we moved to the U.K. in 2009. We are citizens and love a lot about two counties we have lived in, Cornwall and now Yorkshire but have always resonated with France. It sounds like ‘first world problems’ but to find where you can feel like you belong is difficult and exhausting. We are on the precipice now. To sell our old house (we have rented it out for 13 years and finally got burnt by a tenant) in Canada now? To go ahead and buy a house in Scarborough, Yorkshire because there are NO rentals? Final destination France? The world is SO much different than when we were young! We are in our mid fifties too with similar tastes to you two. I wish you huge luck and will keep watching and supporting your journey. Thanks for creating this channel! xxx

[@francetogo794]

Good for your choice in France. I have plans to move to France too. I really think they would love France because France has something for everyone. Plus it's so easy to get around on the Tram over in France. Portugal doesn't have the infrastructure like France.

[@formica.]

Nah don't force a "permanent" decision. Go year by year until the choice is obvious. Procrastination is freedom too.

[@RS__7]

I'm British I'm thinking of going to Canada

[@manuelaisabel2237]

I was around 40 when I spent a few days in Coimbra and this is long long ago - I will never forget how much I suffered from that noise in the night and soon from sleep deprivation and exhaustion with no wish to stay a single more day. Being back home in Germany was such a relieve, and so the only positiv I remember is the impressingly beautiful library I visited the first day when I arrived at the city.

[@james1327]

I think moving to a new country with a different language and culture is harder when you are older. When you’re younger you accept discomfort more easily and are more open to experiences. When we’re older we try and rebuild our castle and replicate or exceed our previous standard of living.

[@karafolkerts]

wow - came across this randomly as I'm looking to relocate to europe from canada. I have been following nathaniel for YEARS and love his creative outlook on life. I thought you looked familiar then put it together quickly that you were his parents (the extra videos helped!). But truly, hearing your outlook on travel, life and adventure is beautiful and it's no wonder you have such a creative son! Looking forward to seeing what's to come!

[@Oida-Voda]

"To Europe"... EUROPE has 47 countrys! (EU 27) Most of them are completely different! ("USA" vs. Cuba!!!!) The countries of the EU have a huge difference in wealth GDP/capita! Some countries 1:10! Greece/Luxemburg for example :) Go to Germany, Austria, the Netherlands, Denmark, France, the north of Italy... the northwest of the EU, not the south! (Switzerland is not into the EU!) The countrys into the south are poor, so your salary in these poor countries is low and you never make enough money to go anywhere in the north.

[@writeronthestormkyushu565]

The spaces in between all of our planning is where living actually takes place. The beautiful, uncertain and unpredictable now. The wisdom, honesty and insight... thank you guys for sharing your journey.

[@jennybertenshaw7694]

Having moved ro Portugal to retire ( after living in the Netherlands for 30 yrs as a Brit ) I am surprised that you did so little research on WHERE in Portugal you were going to live I t almost sounds like you put a pin in a map..People ( and i must say especially Americans as they rarely live outside of the USA) HAVE to do their research. You have to be flexible and NOT expect the level of comfort you had in the USA Portugal was poor..BUT since joining the EU has come on in leaps and bounds. They are now 1st world in technology BUT your living in an old world place It takes TIME to connect the two things. It will come. We moved to the Algarve because this was already in place, because of the thousands of ex-pats who already live and work there Plus the climate was.important to us as retirees , to be warm in the winter. The North is very different .Keep exploring with an open mind Good luck

[@julian1858]

We don't live in a different place because our country is way bigger than Europe and we have all kind of environment here in the USA besides that, we don't have to be concerned on a freaking dictator like Putin knocking on our door. We have good beaches in Florida, South Caroline, California, Hawaii, Porto Rico, we have desert places like Texas, Arizona, Nevada, we have cold Places like Alaska, New England, Colorado etc.... This is why we dont need to leave our country to live in a different place, to live like an outsider. We live in a place with everything we need and everything "you" wish. With all due respect, this is USA, the best place to live.

[@jpmtlhead39]

"old world place", well in terms of history,you right,but if you mean something diferent,well you have a good choice,and you know what it means. Honestly. PS : The problem with US citizens,its their "Ignorence" in what concerns to Education (school wise). Its very poor and self centered,what means The lack of knowleged of The world outside The US,wich is very sad being such an "Young country" compared to Portugal,and both in The 21st Century. And with The Tools available Nowadays,in relation of seaking for knowleged. You only dont know,if you dont want it or if you are lazy.

[@julian1858]

@@jpmtlhead39 I don't want to live in a different country. It doesn't mean I'm gonna be here stuck in my homeland, I can go everywhere to see other countries, different people, culture and so on, but not to live. We have everything we need and there's no reason to look for something we already have, that's the point, I don't blame you or anyone else for moving somewhereelse, that's your choice, it's up to you to decide on that. We have a big country with everything we need like I said before. If you wanna see beautiful beaches with clear water, you can see it in the USA, if you want to see the canyons, we have it here, if you wanna see snowfalls, we have it here, if want to see volcanos, we have in the USA and like I said, we have everything here. It's plain and simple. There's no mystery to understand why we don't need to move to other countries and besides that this is the best place money, to make business.

[@julian1858]

@@jpmtlhead39 you're talking about ignorance and education about American people, you're totally wrong, you better come over here to see American citizens personally. If you want to meet American people, i don't recommend you to go to MYC, Miami, Orlando, Boston or San Francisco because all you're gonna see is foreigners, come to Connecticut, Rhode Island, Jacksonville in FL, Texas and so on to meet American citizens, I bet you're gonna change your mind, your perspective about us.

[@julian1858]

@@jpmtlhead39 about education if you mean going to school or something like that, we have so many universities on top 10, top 100, we have the best ones in the world. MIT, Princeton, Harvard, Yale....

[@katiem6773]

All the best you two. Looking forward to hearing more of your explorations! 🥰🇨🇦

[@shyamdevadas6099]

Thanks for making this video. I thank you more for others than for myself. I've lived overseas and I long ago learned the issues that you mention here. I've spent time in both Europe and Asia and the same dynamics apply. You should simply NEVER commit to a move until you have spent a whole year (four seasons) in a place. You should also never buy real estate until you are certain you like the area. Finally, you should ALWAYS have a plan to come back to the U.S. There are so many things, ranging from natural disasters...to financial disasters...to war that could make a move to a foreign country a disaster. Having said all of this, I still plan to retire abroad. I just intend to do it very carefully.

[@whatmeworry7184]

I was born in the UK, lived in the US for 40 years. At 41 I decided to move to Ireland. I wanted a new life. Before I moved there, someone I knew had a house ready for me. I had 3 months worth of rent and a little for food and bills. I was going to make this work. Within 3 days I got a job, 2 weeks later I ended up with my permanent job for the remaining 4 years I lived there. It was majority positive experience and I think it really had to do with language. The last year of living in Ireland I fell in love with a Frenchman. December that year I moved to France. Been living in France since. France is a way more difficult because of language and it's a totally different system. I do love it here, don't plan to move. I have lived in Europe for over 18 years.

[@myinsignificantopinion799]

You've have had an amazing time, I can tell.

[@whatmeworry7184]

@@myinsignificantopinion799 Thanks, it has been quite an experience. Mostly positive.

[@puidemare2337]

I can't remember her name at the moment but I remember reading a statement she made. She is a writer from Indian and was displaced from there and had to relocate to a foreign country. She came to the conclusion that home is a state of mind. Interesting enough that resonated with me when I was a hardcore traveler. But as I gained more life experience, I realized that home for me is going back to my roots of my culture is where my heart and spirit had always been. I did all the exploring in my younger years and found nothing beats family. friends, nature and a tight community

[@natureinurbanspace1280]

Jhumpa Lahiri , are u talking about her?

[@deepaadvani1499]

Yes Jhumpa Lahiri , relocated to Rome. She can be poetic !

[@Red_1976]

Have spent 18years in the UK, a year in Switzerland, over a few years in Delhi and a year or so in Norway. Each country and city has its pros and cons. Life is transitional and not meant to be static. Looks like you found home in your partner, which is truly the most valuable..! Good luck in your new adventures.

[@gugy68]

I'm in my 50s and alongside my wife we are highly considering leaving the US in a part time basis. I rather expend long time visiting places, absorbing the culture and moving into another place/adventure. I visited Portugal and while a very nice country, is too slow. The world is too large with incredible places, traveling is one of the best things. Embrace the adventure folks, keeps you young at heart.

[@robertmahler8894]

Thank you for sharing your experience honestly. I left Portland at age 67 to live in Spain. My hopes are not to return unless I have a medical crisis. I no longer look for big projects or remodeling old homes. My goals are modest and on a daily basis. Just a simpler way of life, a small modern apartment enjoying my beautiful surroundings, peace of mind, and short trips exploring different parts of Europe 2-3 times a year. I no longer feel guilty sitting all day at the beach or spending 2 hours having a cup of coffee, as an American I used to feel guilty doing so. The decision to adopt a new way of life includes a change in mindset and expectations, not just changing the locale. I wish you the best in finding your ideal setup. You are so lucky to have each other.

[@TheRickfire]

What an interesting comment

[@christinacutlass1694]

This comment really makes me think… maybe my expectations of myself are a bit ridiculous… thank you.

[@SerendipitySpoke]

Robert, you are living the dream! This is exactly what I have been thinking about the last nine month. I just came back from another scouting trip. I loved sitting on a Sandy beach all day and spending hours having a long lunches and dinners. Won’t say that it didn’t feel a bit weird at first, but was nice not to feel rushed and to really enjoy each moment. I’m going to budget each quarter for travel. This realistically means 2 or 3 bigger trips a year to travel around Europe and coming back to the states for a few weeks once a year to visit family and friends. Just looking for my idyllic patch of sand to set up my umbrella!

[@robertmahler8894]

@@SerendipitySpoke Best wishes to your success!

[@ggbouvier9897]

Hi Robert. As an American, I too feel a sense of guilt when I am done with my to do list and want to just relax. It is an unsettling realization! I’ve had to change my mindset and tell myself that every day is a gift and tomorrow is not guaranteed and to enjoy!!😊

[@tacitusromanus8239]

I have lived in London, Spain, and Ireland, before moving to the US 37 years ago. I can't see myself relocating back to Europe at this stage in life. As I live in California, I want to move to another state that is not as insane whenever I can afford to retire. If you are thinking of moving to Europe, I think the best thing to do would be to rent somewhere for at least 6 months to a year in your preferred country to really see what it's like to live there on a daily basis. Of course, deciding to keep one's home stateside and renting it out would be optimal just in case things don't work out. However, I know that many folks would need to sell their homes just to effect such a move. Great video. I'm interested to see where the Drews end up. Happy hunting in the meantime!

[@heyysophie9928]

Get out of Cali while you can 😂 It only gets crazier and crazier

[@Sigpilot97]

Tacitus Romanus what brought you to the US? I’m a little fascinated with your journey here. I’m also interested in living in Europe, at least for a few years of my upcoming retirement.

[@lb8781]

@Tacitus ... absolutely agree. Once you live in the US, you cannot go back to Europe. These people haven't yet encountered the bureaucracy and intransigence thereof (country rules, EU rules)... Accommodation to living conditions, unique local customs, events and the general attitudes of locals. Good luck over there! Lovely to visit but wouldn't want to go back. PS ... this couple also have no understanding as to how the locals see them. Oh if they only understood the language!

[@tacitusromanus8239]

@@Sigpilot97 I came over here legally in 1985 after finishing university in Ireland. As usual, Ireland was exporting her brain power elsewhere. I had the opportunity to teach in a school, and the rest is history!

[@latinaalma1947]

Renting wherever 6 mos is always a good idea! I did!

[@GambiniAssistant]

Thank you for putting yourself out there. My husband and I have been talking for the last 5 years about selling our home in Vancouver WA, and moving to Portugal or Spain. The information you provided helped me put the tourist-looking glasses aside and look through the long-stay glasses. Our main reason for wanting to leave the US is healthcare costs, quality of life, and looking for a quiet place to live. I can't wait to see how your journey continues. Good luck, and be safe and well.

[@SisterSherryDoingStuff]

Sorry about the Covid. I learn from your son - and I totally relate to you two. 56 years old, living in Portland. I've been wondering to myself, "When are they going to put out another vlog?" The noise factor is huge...yeah, I guess I'm old as well. I'm glad there will be no settling - keep pushing until you find your comfort zone.

[@BeneaththeSurfaceYT]

Thank you. :) Wishing you all the best.

[@katetraveler3039]

We're so very lucky! We knew we wanted to move to Portugal and planned a scouting trip last December. We visited Alcobaça and bought a lovely, remodeled apartment within two weeks of landing. We got our D7 visas, shipped two pallets, and had successful SEF appointments this week so we're legal residents for two years. We love this town, and this country. I hope you find your home here ❤️

[@strattonskier7229]

I have traveled the world all my adult life. Before moving permanently to any location, I first rented got a silly job just to get a feel of the place. Once comfortable then Imoved.

[@LauraHoward-cf1hh]

It has been great following your journey. Thank you for sharing it. I'm excited to see where you both land! I'd love to hear more about the process of leaving your dream home in Portland. I imagine the love of your home had to be a big factor in deciding whether to leave Portland. I sense that you two had a huge connection to that home and the labor of love you put into creating it. I'm not sure this is something that everyone can relate to but I think some places really are magical and facilitate a very special connection that seemingly isn't able to replicate. Our family has a second opportunity to relocate happening now (we pulled the plug on the first opportunity last minute for a variety of reasons) but I am soooo attached to my home, it brings me so much joy, that it pains me to think about leaving it, even though the possibilities of starting over in another state are calling us. It would be wonderful to learn about that aspect of your journey, how you brought yourselves to leave it, if you miss the home, etc.

[@Dtourd]

Thank you for taking the time to make these videos. I have to say however they are not frequent enough! I came across your videos when you were still in the US. In my humble opinion you have one of the best channels. These videos are representing life for better or worse that each of us have in life. Thanks to all your family for their contributions. Please, get busy and make more. I know, easier said than done but please don't have me hold my breath so too long. I am much older than you are! 😊😂

[@BeneaththeSurfaceYT]

Haha, will do Rick. They take a long time to produce and I ain't no spring chicken! Haha. Will try to pump them out faster though. Thanks again. :)

[@Dtourd]

@@BeneaththeSurfaceYT I look forward to see ing more. I relocated from Canada to Mexico over 3 years ago now so I understand the issues. many are hidden and take time to reveal themselves. If you need an assistant I'm available but I'm 68 and perhaps even slower than yourself.

[@lindabruce2295]

Rick, I agree with you. I would love more content too. He is such a beautiful story teller!

[@pamjacobs12]

@@BeneaththeSurfaceYT Being a KZbinr can often be a 60 hr/wk job. You probably need a video editor if you want to find your place in the sun, AND post more videos.

[@kimmykero2421]

I concur, they should consider increasing the frequency of the videos. I love their videos and the last I recall was when they were leaving the US

[@jonaspereira007]

Welcome to Portugal! I'm a Portuguese guy and I laughed several times when I watched the video, specially during the Coimbra part of the video. Good luck finding a place to live. Portugal has many wonderful things but life can be tough here too.

[@nylesgregory2120]

I wish this video was a laughing matter for me. I bought a home, moved to Portugal and have dealt with one crisis after another - rain soaked, leaky walls and all. After eight (8) months of broken house issues and labor contractors showing up days or weeks (sometimes even months) after promised dates, it's not funny any more. The Honeymoon ends and your patience is long since spent. Then anger sets in and you begin to seriously question the depths of your own stamina. No, it's not fun any more.

[@francisco777]

​@@nylesgregory2120 This video is actually a laughing matter, mainly the Coimbra part, this guy went living to the center of a city that is known for having thousands and thousands of university students and big loud party's and then complains about it? I think people simply don't do they're research before moving to different country, as a Portuguese myself, this video is full of stupidity, the couple in the video is simply super weird, and the problem is not Portugal, they will keep having problems everywhere in Europe because they're in search of something that doesn't exist. When it comes to your problem, im sorry to hear that and i hope everything gets better, but this video is just about two picky people and not helpful at all to other people that may want to come to Portugal.

[@celesteg5984]

Great video! Well done, you(s)!! I admire you taking the courage to go out into the world and try to find where you truly belong. It’s very difficult and challenging to move to another country, period. I went to Brazil as an exchange student in high school in 1976… wow, what was I thinking??? It was a very difficult, incredible journey and I made a lot of mistakes but I grew so much and learned so much as well as had amazing experiences and met some lovely people. Of course you didn’t know what to expect, you never know what the room will look like until you open the door and go inside, then and only then can you decide if you want to stay. You videos have helped me sooo much because I’ve been looking at both Portugal and France to move to, and you’ve given me some great insight on things I didn’t know about… which is all part of my journey to make decisions with good information. So, thank you very much for your time, energy and advice in this video!! 🤗🤗🤗🌹🌹

[@APPR.]

Thank you for keeping this content real, with real experience. As someone who has decided that moving to Europe within is will be happening for me, it’s refreshing to hear the realness of moving etc.

[@fionabrown3428]

Having moved from the UK to Spain 14 years ago with my husband & two children, I can relate to all of this.. You're doing everything right & you will find your perfect place, the journey in-between is all part of the process.. For me I'm looking do it all over again but in the opposite direction, we have loved Spain & all it has to offer, but our children have grown up & moved on, my son is now living and working in Norway & my daughter is back in the UK. We're not getting any younger so feel we have one last move within us, we're in the planning stages to move back to the UK within two years, but to a totally different area this time.. Keep up the great work with these open and honest videos, you're relaying your experiences so well, good luck!

[@stepheng9607]

Interesting and I wish you the best of luck. We met a couple last year (he was British and she was Finnish) and they had lived for many years in Germany. They decided to move to the UK because their daughter had moved there and they were now retired. They said that they bitterly regretted the move, despite being closer to their family. So I think any move needs to be done with realistic expectations. All the best.

[@gail3318]

May you find your happy place. 😊

[@tomh2121]

Welcome back home to the UK. I’ve lived in France and Malaysia but home always hits right for me.

[@fionabrown3428]

@@stepheng9607 Thank you, yes I totally agree with you. We're definitely not blinded by any illusions of what the future may hold back in the UK, the reasons we left in the first place haven't gone away & in fact predictably have gotten worse. But after casually visiting my daughter earlier this year & who is now very settled & happy living in the North East of England, I found myself very unexpectedly falling in love with the area. Apart from being nearer my daughter, also realising the transport links direct to Norway & my son can't be ignored either. But given all this, my love of Spain is deeply etched in my heart & I know the culture shock of moving back to the UK would be very real. Apart from being closer to family in the UK there are other valid practical reasons, due to this stage in our life, plus health factors to consider, to why we are contemplating this move. My husband and I talk about the pros and cons of returning almost every day, we haven't decided anything for definite yet & still have just over a year until we have to make a decision. So we will see how things look then. I just feel grateful that we have options, we are making this decision slowly together as a couple & are not being rushed into anything hasty, due to some unforeseen negative life event. x

[@fionabrown3428]

@@gail3318 Thank you! x

[@brunafernandes2725]

I love this video, being Portuguese and returning to Portugal this year I can also relate to the stress of finding the perfect place. But the truth is, sometimes the reality is that you have to find a balance between where you want to live and the enmities you want to have. One suggestion I make is to visit Guimarães (the birthplace of Portugal). It's a magical place full of culture and great restaurants and supermarkets, but also close to nature and it's a peaceful place. Hoping you're not discouraged by the hard times, remember that it's normal not to feel at home at first and that's just a phase. Portugal is a wonderful place, so I hope you can find your special corner here.

[@79birdsong]

It's so true how one experience a place when you are on holiday. My husband and I sold everything we owned and left our country when we were in our early fifties for a better retirement in Europe. You guys so much reminds me of our time exploring and looking for the right place to settle down. Challenging but exciting. After 15 years in a foreign country we decided to return to our own country, which has many problems, but we are home, not foreigners anymore. We enjoyed our stay for a few years in a European country but we realised that we will always be treated as foreigners, in your soul you never feel at home, even though you enjoy some things, culture differences is a tuff one. All the best with your journey I trust you will have peace when you find the right place to settle down.

[@TheSandyKale]

Keep exploring. Great that you decided to move in your fifties. It is always a tough gig trying to adjust to a foreign place especially when you're set in your ways after living in another place for decades, that too 5K+ kilometres away. Kudos!

[@MishaElRusito]

You're NOT old! It's actually normal to want silence, quietness and peace. Many people these days are just possessed with insanity, low vibrations and heavy energy. It's okay to not be like them ;)

[@williambiagi1386]

Well said! Or, as I like to say, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being/living differently if that is who you truly are, and one of the blessings of getting older is this realization.

[@alexvlasny9755]

I think the key is to live in Europe just a few months out of the year and the rest in the States. This way, it would keep it fresh in your mind why you hate living in the States and would allow you to appreciate Europe more.

[@laurettelaliberte8864]

I've been doing that for 12 years. I come home from the end of Novembeer to Jan or Feb every year.

[@josephrobi6806]

And hate Europe after and come back to the USA 🇺🇸

[@valdez3245]

That is probably the best way to do it if you can afford it.

[@lb8781]

If hate the US... why stay at all? Go and adopt a new place, immerse yourself, learn the rules, customs and the language. Never look back! But if you are a part time american, only here for the pay and benefits and you visit and "re-charge" elsewhere, then you are merely a spoiled tourist there and a discontent at 'home'.

[@Matthew-rp3jf]

And vice versa

[@gailalbers1430]

very interesting and honest glimpse into one older couple‘s view of portugal and search for a home in Europe. ❤

[@BeneaththeSurfaceYT]

🙏😁

[@NapaValleyVegan]

Ciao! My husband and sold everything we owned & left Napa Valley in 2018. We spent 2 years in Berlin before being lured to Sicily by the 1€ house program. Your experiences so far very much mirror ours. And we were trapped in our small village in central Sicily for much of 2020 to early 2022 because of mandatory lockdowns. I have to remind myself to be grateful sometimes because the journey has been so fraught with challenges. Wishing you guys the best!

[@rounders83]

Congratulations on your story and welcome to PT. If I can give a suggestion, have a look around Viana do Castelo (e.g. Afife or south of rio Lima). A bit more up-north might be a good fit: mid sized but beautiful City with strong local culture and essential amenities, seaviews, TOP local food and friendly people - I'm from Lisbon and no real estate agent, so this is non biased :) - The cons might be the need for a car and approx 1h drive to bigger cities Porto or Vigo (Spain). Felicidades.

[@genacaldeira3793]

Hey. I'm portuguese and I already lived I. Poland and Czech Republic. In Portugal, I lived in Faro, Lisbon and Vila do Conde. I can tell you that in my experience no place "feels like home" out of the gate. You need to invest time in getting to know the place, make it your own, meet new friends, find favourite restaurants... It's just like dating someone, in the beginning it's just a stranger to you, and then you get to know the person and eventually you feel in love with that place, qualities, faults and everything. :) After hearing you speak about what you are looking for, I would really reconsider Vila do Conde. I currently live there and love it, and it really seems to match your criteria. Best of luck in your search!

[@TheAnonJohn]

ah that place is so wonderful!

[@Fzrox303]

@Gena Caldeira Does Vila de Conde get a lot of rain and cold in winter?

[@genacaldeira3793]

@@Fzrox303 Depends on what you are comparing it against. The North of Portugal is definitely colder and rainier than the rest of Portugal. Vila do Conde, since it's close to the ocean, is also a bit windy. But if you are coming from central or Northern Europe, of from a place with colder weather you will probably find it very pleasant.

[@scorpiolady73]

I appreciate this conversation. This is important to me before I retire. Thank you.

[@BeneaththeSurfaceYT]

And thanks for the support, Kelli, much appreciated. :)

[@mn1801]

Man, moving from one place to another is such a major undertaking let alone when going to completely different country. I can only imagine how difficult it must have been to live with all that noise till early morning. We also moved to Europe and lived in an apartment next to a busy street and it was really bad.

[@stevenroberts5741]

Wishing you well in finding your ideal home....looking forward to following your journey 😊👍🏻

[@BeneaththeSurfaceYT]

Thank you!

[@crotbart8881]

How refreshing to find a level headed analysis about all the challenges of moving abroad. Very appreciated! Excellent. Having lived abroad many times IMO there is not perfect spot. There are only tradeoffs. If you want to be within short walking distance of dining and book stores and markets you get the noise, crowded streets, etc. If you want to have peace and quiet it means being at a distance from town. There is a sweet spot just outside of town where it is quiet enough, and close enough where a compromise works. Finding a good property in your price range is a whole different issue and filled with new compromises. It's a lift. Settling is going backwards. Stay mobile until you find something that excites you and feels like paradise. That said. Consider that every city/town has its own rhythm and inner life. If you love it 47 weeks out of a year, then calendar those weeks to travel or explore elsewhere. Tavira is great 9 months out of the year, but at the peak of tourist season it is like Disneyland. Rental rates are at their peak - and often you can rent your place out an be "paid" to travel and then some - can be a win/win. Stay flexible. Think global. Travel the world. One place can not be everything.

[@hyacinthABC]

Well said! Having lived in several such places I now realize that what attracted me as a tourist will attract many more tourists when I am a resident and now Airbnb-type rentals and party-all-the-time threaten to push me out of my city.

[@og7952]

Well said!

[@lynliberty4972]

Great to hear your perspective! Good advice. Thank you.

[@timhanser1943]

Thanks , what incredible energy you both have , very inspiring , I agree with you , keep on moving , congratulations on living life to the full .

[@kifkroker6483]

Having lived and worked in Canada, Australia and a dozen European countries, I would say that after passing the honeymoon phase, another reality settles in. I've experienced this every single time I've relocated. You now how it is... we always want the grass to be greener on the other side of the fence! In your case it seems that the noise and stuff not functioning in the apartment, is what made the glass tip over! When I was younger I preferred to live in the downtown area. Now a couple of years older, I avoid it, and prefer to live just like you lived in the US, meaning on the countryside with no neighbours. This way, if I want quiet or turn up the music, I can do so whenever I feel like it! By the way, your house in the US and its surroundings were quite beautiful! When I'll set my roots somewhere, I want to live in a similar and situated house like yours in the US! I think in your case, the biggest issue is that before Portugal, you lived on the countryside with no neighbours? and now you live in the downtown area of a city, and that also is a university city! I believe you guys would be like the fish in the water if you lived on the countryside in Portugal. Godspeed!

[@TheRickfire]

Brilliant comment but I think the countryside might be too quiet unless its an easy drive to get to places

[@kifkroker6483]

@@TheRickfire Thx m8! You're right. That of course matters a lot! But even when taking that into consideration, I think that it would be way better than noise in the downtown area of a university city.

[@watherby29]

Its only when the life hits you so hard that you are happy to make it to the bathroom on your own you start to come back to reality. You dont need all those things. The sooner you understand it the better

[@teresah2964]

Wishing you well !! I feel same way at times

[@watherby29]

@@teresah2964 All the best to you too :)

[@m_christine1070]

Yes! Exactly!

[@barrywhite5502]

What's a bathroom? I use coffee cans.

[@bruceelniski]

We are just hitting our 70s here in Lethbridge Alberta Canada. We really need the healthcare system we have. Any place we visit would have to offer good healthcare. I laughed at the comment about getting to the bathroom on time! That has always been a concern of mine. I really like and need a decent close bathroom!! I can face the world bravely so long as that bathroon is not too far away and always available when I need it!!

[@juliet3827]

I love the similitude between you and your son. Now we know from where Nathaniel gets his inspiration/curiosity, etc.

[@storzbickel4328]

Damn man. This is incredibly well done. The detail in what you're conveying, the structure, the honesty.. Brilliant job and very inspiring.

[@cassandragarcia3363]

I hear you! We retired and moved to Merida, Yucatán, MX 4+ years ago. We had a few surprises, living here is not like being a tourist! After some adjustment, practicing patience and acceptance, we're doing just fine. No regrets. Keep calm and carry on!

[@loebrabas]

Foreingers who dreams about living in Europe choose generally for the southern regions. Like South of France, Spain, Portugal. For us Europeans, it are also holiday locations. With tourist traps, real estates with issues. If you go for permanent living You have to avoid the tourist hotspots and cities. Find a good real estate is not easy. A good broker with good references can be a help. Please consider places like the south inner land of Spain, The Atlantic part of spain, avoid the coastlines of the Meditterian sea . Other options more to the Nord of Europe. Nord of France, Belgium The Netherlands, parts of Germany. People there a more intoverted. the real estate marked more stable and the small cities artfull and calm to resident.

[@imeandmyself525]

Why is Greece always forgotten?

[@dezonme]

Please continue to keep it real...this is very honest and helpful for people to know that the Rose Colored glass come off around 6 to 9 months. We consider your experiences because you seem to be apart of the same mindset of seeking a few new places to hang your hat until you find that comfy home space.

[@lmgtulsa]

OMG, you guys are amazing. I was stressed out just watching this. I can not imagine going through this and keeping a smile. Well done and bravo to the both of you! Thank you so much for making these vids.

[@BeneaththeSurfaceYT]

Thank you for your amazing support! :)

[@dinosilone7613]

Before saying anything else, let me thank you for your honesty and for going to the trouble to make this video. I’m about to embark on a similar adventure, not to Portugal, but still in Europe. I think my expectations are very different from yours, though. I’ve never had the experience of living in the “perfect place”, or having the “perfect home”. How many of us ever do? And if we ever do have that, how many of us just find it? Why would we expect to find that when we retire? I’d be happy to find “good enough”, and “better than where I currently live” in certain key respects. Access to good healthcare, as you said, access to good food, an opportunity to make friends. A lot of that takes a fair amount of time living in a place. (When I moved from New York City to just 10 miles away in New Jersey, it took years to really integrate and feel at home.). And it takes being fluent in the language. (You didn’t mention if you guys speak Portuguese.) But I wish you the best of luck finding what you’re looking for. Just wanted to point out that you’ll probably have to build it over time rather than “find” it.

[@quixotiq]

This.

[@wonderwomanenlightenment641]

Thank you for being so authentic. I can't wait to for the next chapter in this because I want to leave the US and live in Portugal.

[@eagle1de227]

All these questions you lived trough in Portugal should have been asked beforehand in the US. What climate do you seek or at least could you live with? What housing do you expect? what environment should it be or at least could you bare? how do you finance your life? what jobs do you seek for? what culture are you ok with? Most important is also what of those prerequisites are a must have and wich are nice to have? Have you prioritized your bullet points? Prepare as much as you can before you're on site getting unhappy. There's enough places/organizations you can get help from!

[@olgaboisvert3964]

I feel you. My husband and I retired and changed province's in Canada. We always lived in a city but found a beautiful rural property with a gorgeous house. Fast forward 1 year later and we are moving back to a city. We also had the fantasy of living in the peace and quiet of country life. The people are fantastic but the reality of driving 1 hour to buy groceries has gotten to us. There are no parks or restaurants or cinemas within an hours drive. We tried but hello to city life.

[@jackiecordova7291]

I have moved to Switzerland it's my country ORIGINE 🇨🇭 lived in the U.S with my husband he is American from Texas we are both very happy in Switzerland 🇨🇭🇺🇸

[@kerrynight3271]

Best of luck to you in your move. I'm so glad you have the choice.

[@jackiecordova7291]

@@jod886 thank you for replying yes I love my country Switzerland 🇨🇭🇨🇭🇨🇭🇨🇭

[@jackiecordova7291]

@@jod886 forgot to tell you it's a peaceful country with order and LAW'S and I am so proud of it our government is absolutely not corrupt that's why my country is so stable thank God for it I wish other countries could take a excemple

[@og7952]

To be fair, in Canada, 20 min away from a city and you are in a rural area... no need to be 1 hour away

[@karenwaltz-davis296]

I am finding it hard to understand that you had not researched your Landing area a bit more prior to moving. All college towns are vibrant and noisy. So are the bar and restaurant districts. There are thousands of books and sites on Culture Shock, you passed the honeymoon stage already and are now settling into the "oh my gosh, what have I done stage". Finding a new normal in a new country is not unusual. A great book for understanding family issues while navigating these new changes is The Third Culture Kids. It is fascinating reading for you and your family. Having lived in 15 different countries in the last 20 years, I can say you are doing great, you are facing all these challenges with gusto. Keep plugging along and do not get discouraged - remember, you can't always have total control over everything and as adults you are discovering that you don't know everything - and these new things will be great stories you reflect upon later in your journey.

[@sannej]

I went on a 7 week exploration tour of Portugal last year and, just like you, I had a difficult time settling on a place. For me the bay of Obidos and Tavira were areas that were quiet enough. Tavira is a touristic town but it isn't as bad as the rest of the south coast as there is no beach nearby.

[@CB-vg1wq]

I appreciate your honesty about your move. You have helped people be realistic about what a move can be like. Your video does not mention if you met other expats from the US. I would think they would have been great help to you. They have already gone through all the challenges you were going through and would have been a great resource. I also agree with needing to integrate into the community, join a church, a club hang out with locals. Hopefully, your next move will work out better.

[@knjmoorhouse5093]

Every place in the world has its advantages and disadvantages. When we move to a new country, we're going to have to step outside of our comfort zone. In doing so, we learn to both appreciate and challenge things we have taken for granted. The first year is always the hardest. I have found that as we adapt to the new reality, we grow. As we appreciate other cultures' priorities, we begin to adjust ours. Living abroad usually gives us the opportunity to think more about what is really important in life. And if you stick it out for 2-3 years, when you go back home, you discover how you've changed. Perhaps some comforts we're used to in our homeland are not available in the new country, but we gain other benefits that our own doesn't offer. Not all benefits and challenges are of the material kind. I now live in a country where efficiency and planning are not the cultural strong suit, which can be annoying at times, but people are friendlier and more considerate of our feelings, family values are strong, and the weather is way better. The countryside is also very beautiful and our most important needs are met. Enjoy the adventure and take it easy. It will be worth it.

[@sandrinedandrea4922]

I appreciate your honesty and can totally relate to your story. 8 years ago we left Brooklyn, NY, and moved to Rome where we stayed 5 years. And just like you said, there is a huge difference between being a tourist and a resident. Now that we are back in the US, there are many things we miss about Italy, and are even thinking about retiring there. Have you considered Italy? Just like Portugal or any other place in Europe, you will encounter problems but you may still want to give it a shot. Please feel free to reach out if you have any questions. Good luck!!