The Surprising Truth About Overcoming Adversity Nobody Tells You

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

When I embarked on this video, which will be the first in a series. I really did wonder if it would be interesting enough for all of my wonderful followers. I really don't want to bore you. Thank you so much for all of your supportive comments, they really do mean so much to me xxxx

[@sandyb6668]

@@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc - you’re a wonderful story teller. You’ve a real talent, I mean it.

[@theintrovertedyoutuber]

I can only imagine the compassion you must have developed in your life because of your upbringing. As an American, I can't imagine attending boarding school. You have such a soft-spoken gentle demeanor with a warm and compassionate spirit that is palpable. Thank you for sharing your experiences and difficult and challenging experiences. Bless you❤

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you darling for such an insightful comment. I have always tried to find a silver lining for any unhappy situation I have found myself in. And having so many challenges growing up and even more as I got older, has given me so many opportunities for empathy with people I have come across. There are very few things I haven't gone through myself and I see this now as a strength. Having the ability for empathy is a gift...albeit hard won. Sometimes describing something to someone is like trying to describe blue to a blind man, but when you have had so many challenges then you already know...no description necessary. Much love to you and yours darling, Imi xxx

[@Christine-xq9ep]

What a cruel life you had when you were younger and the neglect, which it clearly was, I felt the hurt as you were recounting it, it obviously cut inside you very deeply and was bound to have lasting effects on your self esteem later in life. I could have cried for you. But yes I would love to hear more videos about your life past and present, and look forward to the next part xx

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you sweetheart, you are such a compassionate and empathetic soul. I only began to work through my lack of self worth when I got into my 40s. That's another story I suppose. Thank you for watching and yes I will be recording the second part of my story today so that I can hopefully post it tomorrow. Much love Imi xxx

[@jowildsmith]

Oh Imi ❤. My heart goes out to that poor child. What a magnificent storyteller you are - I was captivated! Thank you for sharing your story with us xxxxx.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

You know Jo, at the time of all these things happening, I didn't think much about it...it was just what happened and I had to get o with it....only when I'm older and reflect on it, do I see how far from most people's normal it was. Much love Imi xxx

[@NGD1953]

Very interesting. Much of your life I can relate to myself. When it was happening in my life I didn’t realize it as neglect. I was always on my own, too. 😢 Please continue to share.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

@@NGD1953 What I realised in the end was repeating the same things over and over again and expecting a different result is just foolhardy. It was me that had to change and once I did that, sought help, then things started to get better. xxx

[@angelajohnston7332]

Hi Emi, I found you by accident and glad I did. Firstly I’d like to say that i could listen to you speak all day. You are very classy and articulate. I am sorry for the loss of your son and everything you have had to endure throughout your life. I relate to many of the things you went through and admire your resilience. I’m 46 and left an abusive relationship 3 years ago and I’m still broken. My children are adults and I’d like to meet someone but after what I went through I can’t trust anyone and see red flags everywhere, I fear I will end up alone. After severe narcissistic emotional abuse you are never the same person and see the world differently. I relate to what you said about being a person that feels compelled to help others and it’s hard to change your nature but ultimately you find that because you are caring and empathetic people take advantage.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Oh Angela I am so sorry to read this. I kept making the same mistakes over and over again until I sought help in the form of Neuro Linguistic Programming and that made all the difference. I stopped ignoring the red flags which in the past I had perceived as nothing more than Bunting. You will heal and you will be happy one day darling , just like me. xxx

[@connien7690]

Emi, so sorry to hear how difficult your early life was. I did not go to boarding school, but so many of the other things that you mentioned was very much like my life. You sure did not deserve any of that. It is a shame how adults can be. Has anyone ever told you that you look like the actress Kim Novak. She was so pretty. Thank you for sharing. Hugs! Connie

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Good Lord darling, did you have a challenging life too? I haven't ever been told that I look like Kim Novak, but I have been told a lot of times that I have a passing resemblance to Meg Ryan...but I definitely haven't been told that since I reached 50! Much love to you and yours darling, Imi xxx❤

[@kaycee625]

Thank you, Imogen, for this recollection. I would love you to continue.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you darling. I hope to have the next episode up this evening or at the latest , tomorrow xxxx

[@Found-in-France]

I feel like giving you a big long hug. I grew up close to Romford and my family all live in Essex. For the first time in my 62 year old life, I have recently recognised how deeply my childhood has adversely affected me. My parents divorced when one would get bullied about it, but at least it stopped the terrible rows. My step-mother tried (and still adores my father where they live in Brentwood) but she was adopted so not very capable with children and she is the gate-keeper that we have to traverse to reach my Dad. We were never allowed to talk about previous good times in her presence. I have many small memories like yours such as her telling me I could not wear my parents' wedding ring in their house which my mother had given me. Previously I would never consider the concept of nurturing my inner child but I have realised it's good stuff and helping me to losing the anger and resentment that built up from having to cope with childhood trauma.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

I am so sorry to read this darling. I have long since accepted all that went before as training for the person I am today. It's the only way for me to make sense of it and gain something positive from what has been many rubbish situations I've found myself in. I'm enjoying your channel and have now watched all of your videos. I especially loved the poem in your art journal. It really spoke to me. Much love Imi xxx

[@vivianhudacek1556]

I’m so sorry you had to endure such dreadful treatment in your early years! You are such a beautiful, sophisticated, lovely person. You’re obviously very strong & intelligent too! Bless you, my friend!

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you sweetheart. It's funny, at the time it didn't seem that challenging...I think I just thought that I just had to get on with it. I had very low expectations. Much love Imi xxx

[@vivianhudacek1556]

@ you’ve overcome so much to be such a lovely, intelligent, classy lady!

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

@@vivianhudacek1556 Darling you are just such a kind and lovely lady. Thank you xxx

[@BumbleBee666-u5t]

Some parents have a lot to answer to. It was so tough in those days. I think we have become better parents ourselves because of them. I’m sorry that you went through so much 😔

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

We can only try xxx

[@violettabicycletta331]

This life story breaks my heart ... I hope life is better for you today !.♥️

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thankfully it is darling xxx

[@maryhall3722]

Thank you for sharing your childhood beginnings, Imi. Your days as an Army child took me back- we used to get a comic from the NAAFI, and in Germany we used to pull a makeshift go-cart with a cardboard box containing all our Superman, Twinkle and Bunty comics round the houses to swap with other children. Your going to boarding school broke my heart and I can't believe the ignorance and insensitivity of all the adults in not recognising uour vulnerability & taking you under their wings. Like others here, I feel your pain; dear lovely woman that you are now. As you say, when you are a child you just accept and get on with it, but yes, definitely look up Dr Gabor Mate. Like you he is living proof of the indomitable human spirit. Thank goidness for the Angela's of this world, and your dear Boy as you call him, who has shown you unconditional love in your happy life that you have now ❤

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Oh my goodness! I used to get Bunty every week! Wasn't that the comic with the paper cut out dolls at the back and the clothes you could also cut out to clothe them with? What a brilliant idea going around with your box doing swaps with all the other children! I've looked up Dr. Gabor Mate and shall watch his video tomorrow whilst I'm rowing for an hour. We were stationed in Wolfenbüttel. Much love to you and yours darling, Imi xxx❤

[@florence1395]

You reminded me of something, I had a little bottle of orange at school because I don’t drink milk, my siblings were the same. I’ve only just, by chance started watching your videos & I think you have truly been through a lot in your life, hopefully it’s better now………..♥️🇫🇷🇬🇧🌹

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Those bottle were ⅓ of a pint and I too can remember some children getting those instead of milk at breaktime. I have a lovely life now Florence. I feel truly blessed at last. xxx

[@MoniQuest55]

Wow! I'm surprised you managed to grow up to be the person you are today considering how badly you were treated! I also read Mallory Towers and the other boarding school books by Enid Blyton and wished I could be sent to boarding school but it's just as well I didn't have to endure that. It seems so unfair that you were punished for not having the correct uniform or name tags because this wasn't your fault but your parent's. I know Kingston well as I used to live not far from there in my 40s. We'd go every Saturday to the outdoor market to buy our fresh food for the week! Thank you for such an interesting video - I always find it fascinating to hear about other people's lives (maybe I'm just nosy!). I'm so pleased for you that you have a lovely husband and home now :)

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Ooh a Mallory Towers fan like me! Did it make you believe that boarding school would be the most fun ever??? The uniform debacle was a bit of a trial. That blazer was Sky Blue but mine was so washed out it looked almost grey! And the over-knickers and short socks were actually fit for throwing away but I assume they charged my father for them anyway.🙄 I went to Kingston last month and was surprised Just how much Bentalls had changed. Far fewer companies in the store and far less stock I think. A sign of the times perhaps, with everyone, me included , preferring to shop online. Much love to you and yours darling, Imi xxx❤

[@lynnpurfield9430]

Thank you so much for sharing Imogen. Dr. Gabor Mate talks of how most of us have trauma in childhood. Of course it has levels of intensity and changes of environment can alter the impact in the long term but gosh, what he has to say is actually not just shocking but liberating too. Kids who have trauma mostly tend to go on to harm their relationships and never love themself. The threaies are ther to assist so why are we not getting access?

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you darling, I will have to look up Dr. Gabor Mate to see what he has to say. I only began to change my opinion of myself when I reached my late 40s. And since then nobody could convince me I'm not a kind and loving person. Much love Imi xxx

[@lynnpurfield9430]

I think.my transformation only got to real depths when I reached 50 but it has been ongoing but a bit slower as I can still catch the odd conditioned thinking or belief that sabbotages me xxx​@@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc

[@johnkeating4221]

​@@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9ycI too began liking myself in my forties, it is a strange experience. Regrets I have many but I belong to a better world now. Yes Gabor Mate is worth a listen.

[@lovearttherapyalways]

Wow! I am so sad you went through all of that. Yet, you remain a resilient, kind and gentle soul. These matrons and selfish adults most certainly should have severe regrets if they had the capacity to realise just how utterly in such a cruel manner they behaved. God bless you and thank you for sharing all you do. .

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you so much for your kind comment. Much love ❤️ Imi xxx

[@Shirley-k7x]

Hi my name is Shirley from Canada 🇨🇦 i am 62 years old listening to your stories devastate s me my Heart is so heavy with understanding my childhood in different circumstances were different but yet the same .I grew up wih 10 siblings and one parent my farther was onlu aroun every couple of years to get my mom pregnant than vanished this is sooooo wrong for the children I grew up Angry at the world with such attitudes Our parents mistakes becomes our future soooo wrong You are a incredible human being if our worlds weren't so far away we would be friends ❤😊

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

I was sad to read your story Shirley. It must have been awful for you. I must admit that no matter what has happened in my life I have never been angry or felt bitter. Maybe it's in my nature to try to find the positive in things and also it has made me into the person I am now. And yes, I'm sure we'd have been friends too darling xxx

[@TLA123y6f]

OMG. TEN siblings? How in the world did your mom support you? What a hard beginning to view life from that perspective. I was a single mom 2 kids no child support and it was an uphill climb all the way. I can't imagine 11 kids. So many people go through so many tragic experiences yet so many here haven't lost their strength. I have the utmost admiration.

[@sandyb6668]

Wonderful listening to you. It’s sounds like my mother experience in boarding school. She swears she can’t write even though she’s an avid reader because the nuns used to read everything. I remember she said no personal possessions were allowed, the girls had to sleep with arms over their chests, you could only wash your hair once a term because it clogged the drains etc etc - the bloody misery. I boarded when my parents went away, I remember the chilblains - they never turned on the heat the misers. Dublin, Ireland.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Oh my goodness, you've just reminded me. We always had to have two in the bath at the same time and only 4 inches of water. We were only allowed to wash our hair once a fortnight. And mine was greasy after a couple of days. You would almost think it was a school for young offenders rather than a posh boarding school for rich girls (not me by the way).

[@BrendaKidson]

Thank you for telling your story l found it very interesting, but my heart goes out to that little girl which has profoundly had an effect on you all your life ❤

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you darling for your warm and compassionate comment . When I stand back from myself and look at my life I see that that child was a sad little soul. Always worried about upsetting someone because the consequences would be harsh. Doing this series will, I think will be quite introspective. This is the happiest time of my life so I feel strong enough to look back from a place of security. Much love to you and yours darling, Imi xxx

[@TLA123y6f]

I have so much respect for you. And I'm a little in awe. You have suffered so many cruelties yet you have a loving and giving heart. That's pretty special. Could you discuss the therapy that said helped you? I think a lot of us have experienced some pretty harsh realities that left a mark. I know the things that happened to me have changed me.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

I will do that for sure in another video

[@carofreeman7598]

I found you by accident but am now following you story by story. Have subscribed and liked each one.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you so much for your kindness xx

[@kaycee625]

ECT is utterly brutal. My husband had ECT in his early 20s. It destroyed him. He can’t show any emotion, he can’t express anything emotional, happy or sad. That bit if his brain was fried. He also has very little memory. His eyes show no emotions. Very, very difficult to be with someone like that.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

I am so sorry to hear about that darling. I always thought it looked brutal but I never realised it could have such a profound, detrimental and lasting effect on someone. That is tragic. I am so sorry you had to go through that. 😢 Much love to you and yours darling, Imi xxx❤

[@Magical_Makeup_UK]

Gosh I really felt sad for you as a little girl not being nurtured like you deserved 😢I cannot imagine it, I have an 11 year old and would be devastated if she ever had to ask for someone else’s apple core 😩 love listening to your channel

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Yes, eating someone’s well chewed apple 🍎 core isn’t for everyone but if it’s the only taste of one you’re likely to get then it works 🙄. Mind you, I remember actually prising some chewing gum from the road using a lolly stick…and it still tasted minty!😳 So clearly, my expectations were very low 😂 Needless to say I can buy my own gum and fruit these days ☺️♥️Much love to you and yours darling, Imi xxx

[@Magical_Makeup_UK]

@ thank you so much for sharing your experiences, you’re soothing to listen to, I’m going through a painful time at present and your videos help ❤️ here’s to being able to afford our own apples 🍎 😉🥰 much love x

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

@@Magical_Makeup_UK Oh darling girl I am SO sorry you're going through a tough time right now. Just remember as I have always done that This Too Will Pass and it does. Never give up, you are way stronger than you think and more intelligent than you've ever been told. You can do this and it will give you insights into human behaviour that you wouldn't have had, had you not gone through these times. You are walking a mile in my shoes. I can now afford to buy my own apples 🍎🍏🍎and still eat the core! You will get there darling. I will be thinking about you today and sending you love xxx Please keep in touch xxx

[@Magical_Makeup_UK]

@ 🥹🥹🥹 thank you so much. I fled with my daughter due to domestic abuse and we are in emergency accommodation over Christmas 😖your sweet words mean so much to me, it’s just nice to know we aren’t alone and I love watching your videos, bringing me much comfort at time 💐🌷🌸 this too shall pass xx

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

@@Magical_Makeup_UK Oh darling your message has made me weep for your predicament. I am so sorry you're going through this. You WILL get through it and come out the other side all the stronger. You will learn from this experience, as I did ...eventually. I hope you're a faster learner than I was. I am thinking of you and will send you strength through the ether. I am rooting for you and your daughter darling xxx❤❤

[@RabbitOverTheMoon]

i just want to paint myself into your childhood and be your best friend and give you a whole apple and half of my sweets (though i would probably not have either myself) . such an interesting life story, keep going, and if you can, some photos would be so nice also.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you so much darling for your compassionate comment. I would love the ability to show you some photos, however, I've often wondered why I didn't have any photos of my growing up. I think it comes down to, first my mother was't one to keep much...she always loved having a 'Good Clear Out' as she would call it and photos were rarely taken in my family. And secondly when you come from an extremely dysfunctional family such as mine, taking photographs as a momento was not high on their priority list. Much love Imi xxx

[@RabbitOverTheMoon]

@@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc yes, i understand that, one of the blessings of Facebook was i managed to join the many school groups and found some photos of my sisters, old friends and myself there. i had dealings with very difficult people also with mental health issues, it turns some of us into very understanding and loving people as i think you are 💖

[@Iamgone1961]

I’m listening to your story with such a sad heart. You’re roughly 5 years older than me, but I can associate with so much that you say. When we grew up was it just a sign of the times that we were treated so shoddily or had such low self asteem? ❤❤❤❤❤

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

You're so right. It was a sign of the time. Things were very different then. Times have moved on . xxx

[@John-ue6ok]

GOOD EVENING HOPE YOU'RE HAVING A LOVELY EVENING JOHN 😅😊😊

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you John. I hope you're having a lovely evening too!

[@violettabicycletta331]

I never read something more painful more soul destroying . !, so so sad ! I hope that life is better for you now !.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Yes it is at long last, since I met my husband xxx

[@zengletree]

When is the next episode? Soon I hope. ❤

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Next episode tonight darling xxx

[@carolinemead7747]

I can relate to a lot of this. Btw it’s quite possible that you and I may have bumped into each other at some point as we are of an age and at the time you went to live with your mother in Romford I would’ve been living in Elm Park (buses 252 or 165 from Romford station)

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Wouldn't that be the funniest thing Caroline?

[@carolclarke5839]

Hi sweet lady you need to write a book you’re life is so interesting sad😢 but would be a good read , I hope the future is going to be much easier ❤

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

It does eventually. Thank you for your comment.

[@alisonspence163]

❤❤❤

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you for your hearts darling xxxx

[@kamakama7778]

😢😢😢

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you darling for the show of support. It really does mean a lot to me. Much love to you and yours Darling, Imi xxx❤

[@msfrost9049]

❤

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you for the red heart darling xxxx

[@alisoncushing7587]

You tell your story wonderfully I couldn't believe how unlucky you have been with your men 😢

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

I think I'm partly to blame for not taking note of all the warning signs xxxx

[@gailirvine343]

This is shocking. So sorry for you.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you sweetheart. Much love Imi xxx❤

[@maybee...]

Be careful what you share. Some people do not have good intentions.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you for your advice

[@kambrose1549]

I didn't suffer like you but I do eat the whole apple down to the stick too

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Wow darling you are hardcore! 😂 At times I have eaten the stick too but in general I throw it away . Also it does save waste doesn’t it ☺️ We should make a club called 🍎 apple core eaters united xxx😂

[@denisecarter5117]

Poor little girl. You had a miserable childhood.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

On reflection darling, I see that I did, but when you're there you just get on with it. Much love Imi xxx

[@hanafri8]

I can't really blame your father. Can't imagine living with a schizophrenic person ,some people are just not fit to be mothers. You had to bear the brunt of it.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

I suspect you’re right

[@hanafri8]

To have a German woman as a stepmother must be hell,because most Germans are so cold,and non affectionate. I think your dad was so damaged by being married to your disturbed mother that he projected all his resentments towards her onto you - so sad. Boarding schools,with all their unnecessary strictness ,and without loving parents to shield you from the staff must have been so awfull😢

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

I must admit wasn’t great fun and absolutely nothing like the Enid Blyton Mallory Towers books I’d read 😳

[@melliecrann-gaoth4789]

❤️‍🩹

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

Thank you for the heart and the other emoji I don't recognise

[@melliecrann-gaoth4789]

Dear Imogen- I have had a look, I can’t fond the post with the other emoji- There is a few I like, they kind of go beyond words for me. One is 🌱 , it is about growth and goodness from us and also I try remind myself to remember tony shoots need nourishing, many wonderful survivors push on and are so busy pushing on to just do the right thing in life amongst so many challenges that they don’t get to celebrate their growing. I love how you say we can lift one another up as women. Unfortunately some women are Very nasty in a secret way and they can be people who had a decent childhood, good education, supports etc.

[@melliecrann-gaoth4789]

I thumb type on my phone and produce lots of typos. When I have tried correct I sometimes lose the whole post, here I feel that it’s worth posting- typos and all- warts and all! Just discovered your channel yesterday and subscribed.

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

@@melliecrann-gaoth4789 Thank you so much for taking the time and making the effort to leave your comments. They are appreciated ,

[@TheNumber1LadiesClub-lf9yc]

@@melliecrann-gaoth4789 Thank you darling girl, I have always felt that it is important to bring other women with you as you grow. And on YT we've all had a tiny channel at one point...it's best to remember how that felt and stay. humble xxx