THE VICIOUS CYCLE OF MALE ANXIETY || HCPOD

Chuckie & Tazer have a candid conversation about male anxiety in the current dating scene.

[@Gemma.Marie.]

Need a part 2 on this subject! So fascinating to hear a man's perspective on relationship anxiety. Big up you guys ❤

[@sharonleitch7157]

Building positive relationships is the key to success! Get off the phones, take a break from podcasts n get outside n meet people in real life. There are no rules, be authentic with who you are and as openly honest as you can be and confident in describing yourself as you are. There is no pressure other than the ones you ones you place on yourself. Njoy learning about yourself through other people and your relationships. Not every relationship even gets to the point of an intimate encounter! X

[@LisaSmith-xy2uv]

Learnt a lot from this ep as a girl. Honestly very good to hear how it is from the male side. Loved this

[@Laura-sg6ss]

Wordd

[@nataliecampbell-reid2340]

"I saw 6'5 in the bio and I didn't take it seriously' 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'm done

[@Laura-sg6ss]

I was doing my skin routine when I heard that part and I was cacklingg😂😂😂

[@benja303]

Fascinating title, looking forward to this one

[@demonslayer9101]

At this point just give E A a mic. Callum got one...

[@kennethparker9946]

Surely, HC pod can afford a mic. If not, put the brother on the couch. He clearly always has something to say

[@Laura-sg6ss]

​@@kennethparker9946 they can😂😂 but this dynamic is different man😂😂 loooll

[@CP-gq7en]

Nice mature convo today, glad Poet wasn’t there.

[@jas1511]

Music from certain genres / eras can be soothing. Doesn't matter if you were listening to it in that era or have just discovered it.

[@teeinfinity]

People also dont speak about the expected pressure men have on satisfying women in the bed room and the outcomes that can happen if they dont

[@teeinfinity]

We need a PT.2 ...shout out to yall for this dope discussion

[@Sylvia-hu1sx]

I think we as a society are suffering because we don't have a third place to hang out.

[@ZX-fg6xd]

I see this trend going around on social media of people saying there is no third place to hangout. It just sounds like a complicated way of saying people don't have any healthy group oriented hobbies.

[@DavidBlaxk]

I seen that KZbin video aswell

[@Cee_H]

People using the term Third place might be reason they have nowhere to hang out 😅😂

[@T11CVV]

@@ZX-fg6xdyour spot on. I either play footy or go gym for the same reason.

[@Laura-sg6ss]

​@@ZX-fg6xdThird place vs what you said...​ huh?😂😂😂😂 it is way less complicated and yeah essentially it's that. And we are missing it fr because we aint got time. It is literally work and home for alot of people.

[@TheAlkebulanTrust]

When it comes to culture whether Hip Hop or R&B if you truly have passion for the culture and want to live and breath every part of it you'll study it. It's not a generation thing either. It's just an individual thing.

[@capricebandicoot_]

1:03 Chuckie, you are right ibr, youngers are more willing to dive into older R&B/Soul music/albums/projects more than older Hip Hop music/albums/projects

[@Laura-sg6ss]

Yeah because it is proper SINCERE! It is so so so like... idk you bare your soul on these records. Hip Hop is great but even back in the day, sometimes it's like... they weren't always hitting certain aspects of emotion because often having to put on that bravado masks that thing that everyone can connect to in such a way. Unless you were a POET like Pac, like you can put the words together so... like mesmerisingly. Also it was alot more closer to those Gospel roots. That power. Exactly what Tazer said about pulling that ugly face when singing and saying you saw the stars when you had sex with a girl, it was sincere.

[@capricebandicoot_]

@@Laura-sg6ss 🙌🏿🙌🏿

[@rjflores438]

The anxiety I feel with women is absolutely horrible, especially in London. Always feels like you are not enough for them.

[@CP-gq7en]

Sorry

[@rjflores438]

@CP-gq7en its my own issues mate, trying to get my confidence back after a break up a couple of years ago, but I cant say London is an easier place to find love as a man.

[@Laura-sg6ss]

​​@@rjflores438travel - go to Brazil or something and be on the beach and chill. You need sun, helps the soul. I mean it won't fix it just coz you went away but it definitely helps the healing process. If you can. Get out of here. It's gloomy af out here 🥴🥴

[@Laura-sg6ss]

travel - go to Brazil or something and be on the beach and chill. You need sun, helps the soul. I mean it won't fix it just coz you went away but it definitely helps the healing process. If you can. Get out of here. It's gloomy af out here 🥴🥴

[@MsDarkie93]

I think a lot of men feel like this but realistically it’s because they’re going for women out of their league. I have so many friends who have low expectations. Offer to take them out for coffee, or to the library and they’ll be all doe eyed for you. But they don’t fit into the typical aesthetic that most men like these days.

[@KingKhupacabra]

For me I love hip hop, I’m from ldn, 20 yrs old and I love love 90s hip hop. I don’t listen to any rap music today that much. Only a few, less than 10 artists.

[@Laura-sg6ss]

Same. 22. Same!

[@nagamo_5368]

But sex ain’t a causal thing tho ! We talkin bout it like it ai t nuthin

[@joyceosawe6732]

I don’t think this was touched on but I can understand men having anxiety when going back to an ex relationship/hookup. There’s a big chance the girl got with someone else and now you’re directly being compared to them. It can get in your head and ruin the moment. And this can also happen for women too.

[@literarycompost]

this episode really spoke to me at a key point of turbulence so cheers for that. Wholesome to see men opening up about intimate social issues particularly the delivery of charisma and relational banter as flow really kept me watching - the opposite (contra-flux) is hyperreal, polished short-form out-of-context content that relates for a second but you're not left thinking about it in an hour, after a run etc. There's a lot of intersectionality going on here as flow allows for the natural build on/or diversifying subject matter. In modernity, it feels like a constant battle between traditional, imposed values and innovative, instantaneous gratifications. I wonder regarding the assimilated 'safe' yet intoxicatingly woke culture of "green flags" that I may advocate for the Amber Flag People. Marginalisation and stigma is what is often shunned onto this collective, when in actuality it is THESE PEOPLE who understand themselves at a more multifaceted level. Made to feel INVSIBLE at the feat of the consensus opinion. Is a growing pattern of similar habits always legitimate or a self-conditioning that makes us feel safe, even when we want to act against these self-constructed enclosures, yet fail to see the self and opt for the grassisgreenerontheotherflag. Lol. Toxic traits aren't always meant to be inhibited OR healed if a significant amount of trauma or lack of character building due to unchangeable facets (100+ job adverts and no esteem to yield from what you sewed, or perhaps the institution is inherently against people who "think differently" anyway). -The dream in uproar; as we return out back on selective awareness, to rediscover the horror in what is small, yet one is not so given into humbleness anymore, but made to feel imprudent for remaining the same: It's almost like that when the collective isn't giving anything back, and you find that one person in time who does and reopens the inner child inside, that fire spark of human round begins a domino affect. The effect of proper love and intimacy, be it physical or communicative. Sheds the hard shell of cleansed insulation we cloak ourselves as and allows us to stand under the sun as it is, feels less hard: but warm. For me the only other affect of this is music. Good music almost equates to an emotional pornography for me. Each time that same song I'm nauseated into a higher state so frequently have songs on loop big time. My last Spotify wrapped racked up 95 genres and what an intimate display of the artists I love, err xD but unfortunately, like most porn users, Spotify is either free or dirt cheap for direct fund pipelines supporting major artists through to grassroots amateur musicians trying to slice... a penny? On a sidenote, I would be interested to see what people in the comments have to say about sex in manic states, either gender. I find it's a convoluting dichotomy between associative closeness and blurred vision. You're there, but are you? I'm not sure the last time I felt wholly there, that is, hitting the throes of passion in a relative euthymia. The transition between RUFUS DU SOL's Lost In My Mind / No Place speaks numbers (or episodes).

[@saturdayswithlizzie.3610]

For me my blockage comes from childhood trauma and I never want anyone to take control of me like ever!

[@SR-fi8ef]

Isn't that a matter of trust?!

[@ne3371]

Facts!!! This is me as well. When you’ve been through so much stuff you had no choice in, anything or anyone that feels too controlling is a trigger.

[@Laura-sg6ss]

​@@SR-fi8efyeah... stemming from the trauma in her childhood

[@Laura-sg6ss]

​@@ne3371word

[@saturdayswithlizzie.3610]

@@Laura-sg6ssthank you 😊

[@funky1nessa]

Very interesting and I like when you delve into these conversations. I agree with a lot of what was said on both parts. Also I think age, financial situations and working too hard can cause anxiety for men. Age as in the older a man gets and it’s tricky if there is a big age gap in the relationship. Sometimes new jobs can interfere and cause anxiety for both genders because if the job is longer than the average working hours, for women it’s less time together and less sex, less availability. Meanwhile the man is stressing on how to balance both work still make time for social/sex in the relationship. It’s a lot going on when anxiety is in play for both genders.

[@waterbambam7455]

23:00 the woman has the door or do most men lack self control?🤔

[@Priscilla.i.m]

Would love to hear you & Richie Brave discuss this🥰

[@lrmusic4972]

This definitely needs a part 2.

[@Laura-sg6ss]

We need that third place fr. Sorry but EVERYONE COME OUTSIDE MAN I'm sick of this, everyone grow up and just link up in the parks man. On the days where there's nothing to really do and it is summer. Come outside, grab some food and chill, meet some new people. In the winter, idk😂 prince of peckham? Idk but let's find some more places. Coz honestly I've been having this convo with different people for YEAAAARRRSSS, meeting new people can be so hard to do coz it's like where? And because we often don't have that many hobbies anymore, most people can't even start there. WHERE TF ARE THE HALL PARTIES MAN???? CAN WE JUST! 😫🥴

[@CK7Breeze]

I was literally just thinking about this having speaking to a woman. As a man there is no support or any woman checking in on your mental. A woman will have a man check in on her daily just making sure she’s good. A lot of men are lonely as they don’t have the support they give to a woman

[@lizzylovinlahnz4583]

man said manually bend thats CRAZY

[@funky1nessa]

Also the guy in the background 100% needs a mic. We can’t hear what he says when he adds his points in the topics.

[@OverFlow407]

Chuckie at 17:21 sent me 🤣

[@dannywilson5023]

‘Round 2… Big man, that’s not me’ 💀💀

[@bathroomdiaries5393]

19:15 .. A woman who "comes" when you mention that you're coming....it's giving shes faking it

[@zedz1989]

When it’s comes to hip hop the furthest most people will go back to is the early to mid 90s to now, but when it comes to rnb most were listening to songs from mid to late 80s to now. Because those type of songs would be played at a family function.

[@LittleMissSunshine721]

This was a great show! But I can’t help to wonder: would a man be willing to wait for a woman that he really liked if she was practicing abstinence? I’m assuming the man wouldn’t waste his time if he wasn’t feeling her like that. But if he waaaas…could he wait without falling into the temptation of sleeping with someone else? Any man’s input is welcome. Much love from Baltimore, MD.

[@MrD-tu3hp]

Occasionally for the round two is crazy 🤪

[@sharonleitch7157]

I'd like to address the word 'toxic'. In itself brings negative 'hazardous' definition. My assumption is that an imbalance, non conformation, misalignment, disagreement, separation, parting of ways, is not 'toxic' at all. That's a recognition in a healthy way that 2 people shouldn't continue to be together. Toxicity is when co dependency occurs where two people do not know where individuality exists and only see their existence dependant on the others validation of them. Usually repeating negative behaviour for attention from each other x

[@sharonleitch7157]

Observation. Chuckie why are you flicking a measuring tape? Did you edit something out? 😅 x

[@dro4044]

😏 I see how Tazer used "research" very effectively 😂

[@sharonleitch7157]

Chuckie, change of perspective idea for you. Instead of rounds, call it sets. Identify with 1st on level, warm up set, lipsing for example, 4play, body mapping. Finishing is not the goal. 2nd on, raising the tempo level, cardio, with a mix from the 1st set in the flow. Finish is compulsory. 3rd on unifying the participants (hopefully 2 only 😅) most combined orchestral mix of the first 2 sets , middle of the night, sleepy one, rhythm is set, tempo is consistent and powerful. Next morning, 4th round, encore, celebrating the harmony from before, and just incase theres a ticket sell out before the next show, the memory is relived, repeated and recaptured for personal growth and completion of the learning experience. Till the next time.........

[@CK7Breeze]

They said go for a woman you like. No the woman you want or like is long. They either got ex issues. Children. Or self conscious issues that they use too not see you. But they will then give it up to a road man who will dig her out and leave. Then she’s back to being scared because it the dumb mistakes made.

[@msxo365]

At 42:21 Chuckie, he was speaking specifically about wanted sex and a girl wanting a relationship, your gonna be nervous and that’s true cause there’s that pressure, asides from anxiety in other circumstances. Felt like you dismissed him there then after went to Tazer and was more relatable to him, the guy just wanted a perspective in that element cause that’s mostly the case these days and I want to here that from a man’s prospective as a women but you shut that down ffsss cause you was in your debate mode lol

[@serena4875]

Thank you

[@SamSebahtu]

Well, I should put my 2 cents here but its hard on these streets to get laid as a 47yr old woman. People always think that's its easy for a woman to be have sex however this is far from the truth. Wonder if anyone else experiences the same thing?

[@kjaaaayb6]

This pod is hilarious man

[@sibusisocece758]

Hella why’s in this convo

[@FLYSTARTVLONDON]

Get the strap 😮 what kinda meek millz ting ah gwan 😂man said blue 🥎 lava

[@yasmeenvalenzuela6075]

18:34 chuckie is right. Don't say it.

[@Remixprinceisback2022]

That's a katt Williams joke.

[@kevin084life]

28:46 41:53

[@benja303]

29:43

[@user-xh8qt3ez5s]

Love tazer

[@grimetip]

Yesss no poet😊😊😊😊

[@kevin084life]

Why people hate Poet so much?

[@vb8195]

Can actually chill and have this pod playing without getting a headache

[@ne3371]

@@kevin084lifeI like him when he’s chill and he’s better now than before but he hijacks the conversation and it’s so annoying when he’s being close minded and ignorant and insisting he’s right.

[@larkkay]

He has grown on me a lot but its good to mix it up a bit. He, Dan and Chuckie together is my favourite combo.

[@TulipaBigDipa]

I almost clicked off bc he isn’t on tbh.

[@RGMislam]

Did diddy touch you chuckie?

[@shainissa8237]

If a women expects something on the first few dates money wise, she's not the one bro. That says a lot about the direction of where that relationship is going. How you focusing on money and gifts when you barely know each other. Now I'm not saying don't go for dinner or buy flowers.

[@petersbawa]

Icl 4 nuts 👌🏾 spunned me 😂😂 (Pause still )

[@logicoveremotion3321]

😂 maudness ... One Marathon V Mini sprints 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@KK-sg6vp]

can we just get Dan back on cos what is this