The Worst Creatures in the History of Magic: the Gathering

[@MTGGoldfish]

What else would you add to the worst creatures list?

[@blueplayer6197]

I'd probably add Leviathan, it's a 10/10 for 5UUUU ... that doesn't untap or attack unless you sac 2 islands and comes into play tapped, Sky swallower might be in the discussion but at least you can torpor orb it, one can find "Icatian Moneychanger" pretty bad, at least worse than a 1/1 for 1, Flailing Soldier comes with the ability to let your opponent remove it without using a card but he is at least above curve so I don't know, Gate Hound is a really funny 1/1 for 3 (sure it has a weird upside but.. come on... seriously?) Infectious Host suffers from the same issue but technically if you jump through some basic hoops it's like you almost got 2 mana worth for your 3 mana creature? Hawkeater Moth is a flier! and it has shroud! And... it's a 1/2 for 4 mana, did I mention it has shroud? Deathcurse Ogre is like.. I am sorry, why am I also losing 3 life? Who is this card for?

[@moldybones142]

I was honestly surprised scornful egotist wasn’t on the list at all. To me that’s the quintessential bad creature.

[@8017668]

EXILED BOGGART

[@drc4688]

Aven Trooper

[@McD_James]

Shelkin Brownie.

[@blueplayer6197]

Sorry Seth but a vanilla 1/1 for 1 with no downside is already good enough to never compete for a place on this list, it's on curve! It's bad sure, unplayable sure, but come on.. Tenth worst creature? Why? What did he do to you that actual vanilla 1/1 for 1 are better?

[@cullenstraut7396]

The burden of information management

[@mightyone3737]

Yeah, it's a dumb pick for sure, there are much worse creatures than a 1 mana 1/1 without drawbacks.

[@anoobindisguise4337]

yeah it's genuinely insane to put a 1/1 for 1 in a list of bad creatures. like if we're talking about really shitty old creatures there are tons of 1/1s for 2 or 3 with useless abilities in Alpha alone, or like any 0 power wall being basically entirely useless.

[@MrSharpClaw]

Seth just dunkin on an actual little guy.

[@jackvogel701]

Yeah I was gonna say I think he just wanted to talk about the leprechaun. “1/1 for 1 is about as bad as a creature can be” is so so wrong lol

[@allanturmaine5496]

Rumbling Baloth is *not* forgettable. It's a certified Sparky classic.

[@TrainOfImagination]

True. Also I am first reply yay!

[@MTGGoldfish]

Lol, so true. Sparky staple.

[@michaelsparks1571]

Warping Wurm still grows way too slow, but the "pay mana or phases out" actually gives it one counter every turn, not every other turn. It phases in on your untap step, then both triggers with go on the stack at the beginning of your upkeep, and you order them to get a counter before declining to pay 2GU and it phase out again.

[@xaldath4265]

I'm not familiar with the rule that puts the +1/+1 counter during upkeep. You are correct with the every turn buildup, but I'm pretty sure you don't order the triggers. It gets the counter before the phasing cost trigger goes on the stack.

[@michaelsparks1571]

@@xaldath4265 No player gains priority during the Untap Step, which is when Phasing permanent changed phasing states (Phased In/Out). As such, nothing can actually go on the stack during this time. The earliest part of a turn any player gains priority is the beginning of the upkeep. Both the "When Warping Wurm phases in, put a +1/+1 counter on it" and the "At the beginning of your upkeep, pay 2GU or Warping Wurm phases out" triggers will both try to be placed on the stack at the same time. Because you control both triggers, you choose the order they are placed on the stack/will resolve. Even though the condition for the "...phases in" did happen first, during the Untap Step, the trigger itself doesn't go on the stack at that time.

[@singimnotafraid1346]

I came to say this. I think Seth forgot that it would phase back in on its controller's untap step anytime its phased out, and sincenit phases itself out on your upkeep, it's not every other turn like other phasing cards. It really goes turn 4: 1/1 Turn 5:phases out Turn 6:becomes grizzly bear Turn 7:becomes centaur Turn 8:becomes rumbling baloth You only skip the next counter if you pay to keep it for the turn

[@steelWindAlchemist]

Seth not reading cards is a Seth thing to do.

[@TheJadeFist]

@@xaldath4265 Phasing is weird, it phases back in during the uptap step, which is before the upkeep. It's ok the mechanic is rare enough to need to know that. Also doesn't count as leaving or entering the battlefield.

[@laurencebrown3822]

I once made a Merchant Ship deck, way back in the days of early Magic. First, you put in Phantasmal Terrain. Not only does this two mana land enchantment guarantee that your opponent has an island so you can attack them, it can quite often hurt them by taking away a color of available mana for a few turns in the early game. Next, Fishliver Oil to give your Merchant Ship islandwalk. Now you're getting that two life a turn! But why stop there? Next slap on some Unstable Mutations. Give your Merchant Ship the ability to deal some real damage (for a few turns). Protect your ships with all the counter magic you can, toss in some Psionic Blasts for targeted removal or to finish the opponent off, and you have a deck from the very early days of MtG that will send your opponent to the shadow realm when they realize just how awful the deck they lost to was.

[@jamesrule1338]

You sound like a friend of mine who would take cards people would complain about being terrible and build winning decks around them just to break opponents. I salute you and players like you for making the game interesting.

[@SaintAbsol]

This sounds like my kind of deck

[@dominikschneeweihs9538]

Seeing Merchant Ship reminds me how much I used to love these high concept cards that seem to tell a story on their own. Now we only put highly efficient over the curve cards in our decks, but our first decks was just cards that looked cool and fun.

[@noodlesalad]

I enjoy magic still so I don't want to come off as "it ain't what it used to be!" But man, nothing beats those memories from 1994 of opening packs and just getting lost in all of the art, throwing some cards into a deck, taking that deck with a rubber band slapped around it outside at recess and playing unsleeved on the ground. Magic was legit magical then. Cards were weird. The art was weird. Magic design today is burdened by the weight of 30 years of precedent.

[@bensteinhauser784]

Give the leprechaun protection from green. Overpowered.

[@TheUnspeakeable]

Would be useless because it can't be blocked by green creatures, but has to block or be blocked to by a creature to turn it green

[@evanscott1194]

​@@TheUnspeakeable cast protection from green at instant speed after blockers are declared

[@riffingt0n]

I was thinking of comboing it with "Green Ward", which is still terrible, but kinda adorable. It never takes combat damage.

[@willwoll3138]

I made good use of Warping Wurm in a Drop of Honey deck years ago. You cast it, then leave it alone to grow (It phases in, gets a counter and IMMEDIATELY phases out, making it nearly impossible to remove, and giving it a counter EVERY turn, not every other ). Then once it is large, do a board wipe like Wrath of God and slam them with a large Wurm. My best move is when I was able to get my Unstable Shapeshifter to become a Wurm, and eventually I kept it in play, cast a Deadly Insect and now had a 13/8 Deadly Insect (because of the 7 counters on it. I also use Primordial Ooze in my Zedruu deck. When the upkeep gets to high, I gift it to my opponent. It is also useful in a deck with CoP Red, which can prevent its damage.

[@mikeheath4916]

Wouldnt Warping Wurm phase in literally every turn? So after 6 turns youd have like 5 or so counters. Turn 5: Phase Out Turn 6: Phase In, Counter, Phase Out by not paying Turn 7 onward: Repeat Turn 6. Still pr bad but could see a use theoretically. Something like Simic Ascendancy.

[@xenosai371]

That’s how I believe that works nowadays. Back before Teferi’s Protection (iirc, that card had been coupled with a rules change on phasing), objects would phase in at the same point that they phased out initially (so if they phased out in combat on your turn, they phase in during combat on your next turn). So the wurm wouldn’t be around for the beginning of the upkeep since that’s when it phases back in due to its own effect. But I could be mistaken, I didn’t deal with phasing when I first started up

[@nickmysliwiec1435]

To my knowledge, you are correct. Still a bad card but not as bad.

[@mikeheath4916]

@@xenosai371 Unsure if it was always the case but phasing back in (and presumably out, if you have Phasing) happen before Untap.

[@xenosai371]

@@mikeheath4916 ugh the effort of actually doing research. No clue what the basis on my thoughts of old phasing was, but cards like Rainbow Efreet and Vanishing come to mind. You are correct, the only rules change I could find was that in 2017 for Teferi’s protection, cards are not changing zones which meant that tokens no longer die when phasing out. Indirect phasing of auras, equipment and fortifications is still wack though

[@vctrsigma]

@@xenosai371 Phasing-in (or out if due to the static phasing ability) was a part of the untap step since at least 6th edition. That's not too long after mirage, but they did tweak a lot of things at that point so maybe that was the case? but I am skeptical,

[@STS-qi1qy]

'Magic's original Ent' Ironwood Treefolk: Am I joke to you?!

[@banditkeithkingofduelmonsters]

You didn't even spell his name right, so yes.

[@frosty980]

Singing Tree in shambles

[@j.m.manhard]

Card Kingdom actually doesnt have a Goblin Firebug in stock rn. 😂

[@Alikaoz]

Beamtown Bullies stonks

[@MTGGoldfish]

lol, oops

[@greenapple9477]

@@MTGGoldfish And you oop. f

[@butHomeisNowhere___]

Ayy now it does lol

[@ajaxender12]

It doesn't seem hard to fix Merchant Ship tbh. You just give it 4 power, and to compensate for that buff you take away the life gain and one point of toughness and make it cost an extra U. Then you merely design an entire format around it, including sharing a single deck with your opponent. Easy.

[@grixx9707]

I always knew the name referred to the boats

[@FreshMF128]

Explain, please.

[@YoRHa2Bx]

Against the odds: Wood elemental

[@MTGGoldfish]

I wish it was in Modern. Doing in in Legacy seems super hard.

[@wormspeaker]

Seriously though, I'd love to see some against the odds decks try to make some of these cards actually work. It'd be fun for the memes if nothing else.

[@Sheevlord]

Takeno's cavalry. Archer on a horse. Has neither reach nor horsemanship.

[@heywes]

Personally, gifting goblin firebug to an opponent just to kill it and have them sacrifice a land sounds funny.

[@TheRusty]

On Takeno's cavalry; Kamigawa Block is one of those weird sets like Rise of the Eldrazi or Coldsnap, designed to be entirely self-contained. It had almost no interaction with Mirrodin or Ravnica blocks, except for some tribal stuff (even then only goblins and spirits) and two broken artifacts adding to affinity's power (Divining Top / Jitte). It was entirely self-contained. Meaning that a card that ONLY looks at spirits - which were a big thing in the block - might actually be pretty useful. of course, Cavalry was never "pretty useful," even in block, even in limited. You could have a 3/2 blocker vs. spirits, or maybe hold back some spirit with 1 toughness, woopee. But then we get back into set dynamics - Betrayers was a bad set. The two cards anyone remembers from it are Jitte (because broken) and Ink-Eyes (for... other reasons). For a long time it was the Homelands of Modern (until like, uh... Dragon Maze and such) and now it's not even remembered for its badness.

[@xXMGVXx]

Kamigawa was not all bad. The power level was just all over the place. Devoted Retainer and Ronin Houndmaster would have been amazing cards if not competing with affinity. Even in Mirrodin itself there were some really good non artifacts like raise the alarm and Auriok Gleivemaster. Many of the one mana white arcane spells from kamigawa were fine, too. It is just cards like Kitsune Healer another 4 mana 2/2 from kamigawa that make you think none of the commons were playable in that era.

[@Rijnswaand]

You can slap a green ward on aisling leprechaun and suddenly it can block everything and survive

[@damnerd]

I'm adding merchant ship to my dandan and no one can stop me! Make every game 10x longer. 10:29

[@SenorTallon]

"But Aisling Leprechaun doesn't DO anything!" "Yeah, you're right. It does nothing."

[@dhalden93]

Primordial ooze is a funny donate feels like it would be worth it to try building around it once.

[@munsterotaku3058]

stuff for zedruu player but in blue they are already true abominations to give already

[@ScornfulEg0tist]

@@munsterotaku3058 yeah this seems absolutely fine in zedruu

[@cuckoophendula8211]

@@munsterotaku3058 Ah, so maybe use it in a mono-red "donate" deck featuring Harmless Offering!

[@aquafyre99]

My thoughts didn't go to donate, but self-drain. Immediately went to see whether I had one to stick in my Rowan, Scion of War (I did not.)

[@leesoto4395]

First place award for the "I didn't expect that person's voice to sound like that"

[@GoGoGideon]

He came for my leprechaun right out the gate! It's a staple in my favorite old school deck, Leprechaun Ward! You give home green ward and use COP green to outlast the other players long enough to slam some Force of Nature

[@midcoregamer7625]

"My client pleads insanity, Your Honor." "He seems sane to me." "He cast Wood Elemental." "Insanity plea accepted."

[@EclipseWhites]

What about that 8 mana 1/1 that's basically vanil- ALL HAIL THE GREAT LORD SCORNFUL EGOTIST

[@MTGGoldfish]

That might be on the best creature list I'm working on. Legit bomb.

[@chemicals8582]

You can at least play that one face down as a 2/2 for 3 mana

[@totalvoid6234]

Very nearly played that in a tournament because I didn't have 4 Exalted Angels and Morph creatures were kill on sight in the meta. The psychological damage was almost worth it but I went with a different swerve in the end.

[@someguy1ification]

Scornful egotist eas in a set with a bunch of cards that care about the highest mana value among permanents you control. It was meant for Limited, and actually served a purpose in it. Morph Egotist into Torrent of Fire or Rush of Knowledge is real.

[@blueplayer6197]

@@MTGGoldfish Breaking mh3 Emerge cards with Egotist?

[@doim1676]

Warping wurm actually works a little differently. Phasing happens in the untap step. Pretty weird i know. That means turn 4 you cast it. Untap step turn 5 it phases out, untap step turn 6 it phases back in, the second triggered ability triggers, but as nothing can go on the stack in the untap step it goes on the stack in the upkeep, move to upkeep, the first triggered ability triggers and you can arrange both abilities on the stack as you like, so you put the first abilities first on the stack. The wurm gets a counter, then you can pay four mana and if you don't it immediately phases back out, but with the additional counter. That means at least it grows every turn until you pay the mana. So turn 6 it's a 2/2, turn 7 a 3/3, turn 10 a 6/6 but you gotta pay an additional four if you wanna use it for a turn and you can do nothing to stop it phasing out in your untap step a turn later. Actually the idea is kinda cool. It's an ever growing threat that, i imagine, couldn't easily be removed back then because it's only on the board for a couple seconds in your upkeep each turn to get a +1/+1 counter. So you would set it up early and keep playing until you got rid of all your opponent's blockers and pay the four mana to hit him for lethal in a single attack with you grown wurm.

[@chemicals8582]

Regarding Merchant Ship flavor: Blue had quite a few creatures like this early in magic's history, where they required islands to function. The problem really happens when you give your Merchant Ship flying and it still can't attack your opponent if they don't have an island.

[@Dasein23]

Yep . Reminds me a bit of when your opponent casts Walk the Plank on your giant octopus or whale or whatever, and kills it by … putting it in the water 😂

[@jamescooley5241]

Takeno's Cavalry could be a 1 drop lol

[@alexanderstewart594]

"Red didn't get 2/2s for 2 until Crimson Vow" Laughs in Goblin Guide

[@Starzinger666]

You should make a commander clash, where you make a technically correct deck (10 ramps spells, 3 board wipes, win con etc) but cannot choose good cards, and just use stuff like this! =D

[@WookieRookie]

It is called Blim, Comedic Genius

[@MrSameguy]

Flailing Manticore: a 4 Mana 3/3 with flying and first strike would be good back then BUT your opponent can pay colorless mana to destroy it. Goblin Spy: a 1 Mana 1/1 that forces you to play with the top card of your library revealed

[@Mognet_t]

Seth pronounced "Takeno's Calvary" really well. I dunno why, but it made me smile.

[@Asrugan]

I'd love to see subjects like this tackled a bit more from the perspective of "What was the intent of this, was it ever good?" type of breakdowns. For instance, the Leprechaun is commented as a "one and done", when at the time a goal was to pair it with regenerate (to make that repeatable). Given power creep that's a crazy amount to pay for that effect now, but players may not be aware of how these things were used back in the day.

[@CalebvanderLeek]

This is a good point. Historians always have to be careful not to be anachronistic, and comparing 1990's MTG cards to cards from the 2020's out of context is just not particularly useful or interesting.

[@andyony2]

Warping Wurm in fact plays a bit different than you described, Seth :) On turn 5 it phases in again and then at upkeep it phases out again. So if you dont mind having no creature a few turns, it actually grows a +2/+2 counter each turn instead of each other turn and then, if you can cash it in as a crreature by paying the mana. Still bad, but not quite as bad as you described it :)

[@Zakading]

Clearly you're supposed to donate the Firebug to the opponent.

[@ThanatoselNyx]

Aisling is a classic Irish name that is not pronounced the way it looks. It's pronounced Ash-ling 😁 ❤️ From Ireland

[@StrigoiVampire]

The artist spends several hours creating a beautiful illustration for the card and asks Hasbro: "This card is going to be very powerful, isn't it?" Hasbro: 😅👍

[@Eebers]

Goblin Firebug really hittin that "Think, Mark!" pose

[@eegles]

Re: Merchant Ship, I like the landhome ability. Bringing it back could open up a new design space that would allow a less powerful form of land destruction. Start printing cards to better support changing land types. This would support landhome and introduce quasi-land destruction more generally.

[@Suppaichu]

Aisling Leprechaun seems like a pretty harsh psycological attack if you're playing against Crim, can you imagine putting a lure on it and forcing Crim to make his one creature (probably Opposition Agent) a green creature?

[@TrevorSexton]

A few cards that stand out off the top of my head that didn't make the list: Erzatz Gnomes, a 3 mana 1/1 Gnome that lets you tap it to make a spell or permanent colorless until end of turn. Shelkin Brownie, a 2 mana 1/1 Ouphe that you can tap to remove "bands with other" from target creature until end of turn. Both probably markedly worse than a 1 mana 1/1 with a do-nothing ability.

[@MTGGoldfish]

Lol, good choices. Gnomes is hilariously bad.

[@whaleofdarkness]

Ersatz Gnomes can be used with Dromar, the Banisher to prevent him from bouncing himself so it has its uses.

[@seandun7083]

Shelkin Brownie is hilariously bad since even if "bands with other" ended up being a strong mechanic, of the 6 black border cards that use the mechanic, it didn't actually stop any of them. The "bands with others" works when you have at least one creature with the ability and any number with the correct quality. None of the 6 cards that use it actually have it themselves, but they instead give it to other creatures. There is a cycle of lands (Cathedral of Serra is one of them) that give bands with other legendary creatures to your legends of a specific color. If you had Cathedral of Serra to give all your white legends "bands with other legends" then it would only be relevant if you had multiple legends and at that point removing the "bands with others" ability from one wouldn't be relevant (except for the specific case where you had multiple legends, only one of which is white) since you only needed one of them to have it. The 6th card is Master of the Hunt which creates Wolves of the Hunt tokens which "band with other creatures named Wolves of the Hunt". Shelkin Brownie doesn't work here for the same issue since "bands with other" is only relevant with multiple wolves, but each of the wolves has it so removing it from a single one is useless. It would take a decade until Old Fogey was printed in Unhinged with "Bands with other dinosaurs" for there to actually be a card with "bands with others" which Shelkin Brownie could stop. Of course there weren't officially any dinosaurs for it to band with until some point around Ixilan which was more than another decade after that.

[@david_broz]

You can use Goblin Firebug in a Zedruu deck. Donate it to your opponent and then bounce it back under your control to make it a repeatable land destruction.

[@OdinMagnus]

The Goatman that has a built in donate and there is an artifact that bounces a card you own back to your hand

[@Kryptnyt]

I think it can be fun to try to figure out what the worst cards printed in modern magic sets are. They generally make cards that are functional. But I think about Stumpsquall Hydra a lot.

[@Zivillyn]

Your pronunciations that get under my skin aside, Aisling Leprechaun isn't THAT bad. Yeah, it's unplayable today, but there are worse creatures. Also, it had use in a green and black deck back in the day. That "becomes green" effect isn't temporary, and early magic had a LOT of specific-color-hate, and black had a lot of any-color-but-black and green-specific hate. Aisling Leprechaun overwrites the current color of the effected card completely, and now you can hit it with terror, drive it away with protection from green, or whatever else. Give it Lure and swing it, and then suddenly ALL of your opponent's creatures are vulnerable. Granted, even back then that's kinda niche, but so was basically everything. No, this context doesn't make it not unplayable, but it was by no means top ten worst, and shouldn't be considered as such, especially considering that at the same CMC we have such dross as Flailing Soldier.

[@weedle5221]

Was skimming comments to see it anyone else mentioned this. Vid is unwatchable because of his pronunciation. And theres no way in hell its his normal voice

[@chemicals8582]

I played a lot of limited during Ravnica and Kamigawa blocks, and I can confirm that I never saw anyone play Takeno's Cavalry or Zephyr Spirit, even in those formats. Those two were always draft pick #15 in any booster they showed up in.

[@danielquigley2695]

Confirmed, yup I'm taking the basic land over this.

[@Batham55]

I love these types of videos because most of the terrible cards were around when I played (3-5th edition). I haven't played in over 20 years but I still remember these bad cards lol.

[@PedanticTwit]

Aisling is supposed to be pronounced "ASH-ling". It's an Irish word, for an Irish card.

[@Citinited]

Years ago, I made a goofy deck based around Aisling Leprechaun. The idea was to give it protection from green and some sort of lure effect, then swing with it turning my opponent's creatures green. Then I would pick them off with cards that would destroy all green creatures etc. It was pretty funny, surprised to see it on this list though

[@mattbarr6732]

I think Seth just declared war on Ireland with that pronunciation of 'Aisling'

[@dcnole]

Saw the title, thought "If Wood Elemental doesn't make this video, we riot." I will not be rioting today! (Wood Elemental might be my favorite ever magic card because it's art is amazing and it's so comically bad)

[@MTGGoldfish]

I love it too! I've basically made a career off of playing bad cards :)

[@qazzaqstan]

​@@MTGGoldfish I just love that it specifies where the stars are located, Plague Rats is another fun one (and also extremely bad)

[@residentgrey]

Sending Goblin Firebug to your opponent is always a good thing.

[@MindstabThrull]

I think the first problem I see with this list is that many of the "really bad" creatures on this list are Commons from 15+ years ago and you're comparing them to less-than-five-year-ago Rares and Mythics. That seems like an incredibly bad matchup for anyone. Goblin Firebug was printed at a time when Red really didn't get Grizzly Bears at common, and this had a relevant creature type (Goblin, of course), and its drawback only mattered when it left play, so that wasn't as bad as some from that era or before that had worse drawbacks, like sacrificing itself if you don't meet a certain condition or not being able to block (and out of 9 cards before this, 3 couldn't block and Ironclaw Orcs could only block stuff smaller than itself). So I say it was the best version available at the time. Merchant Ship is one of the ultra-rare blue cards that let you actually gain life without needing access to another colour. It was one of my favourite cards for a long time in part because of that. Also Wood Elemental "the forest come to life"? I think you missed Living Lands :D

[@Zirnike]

I played the leprechaun in a deck. St Patrick's day deck: turn the entire opponents deck green. Lures for it, lifelace, circle of protection green to last, stuff to make lands creatures to turn them green...

[@kargnak]

It's a nice list, but it feels like something is missi- ALL HAIL THE GREAT LORD EGOTIST!

[@lseths]

Nah, Scornful Egotist is worst-case scenario a 3-mana 2/2 when you play it morph, which is behind the curve but not actively terrible (it's marginally better than a regular 3-mana 2/2 because your opponent at least doesn't know what it is). And its front side did have a point: Scourge had a lot of cards that were stronger if you had permanents with high mana costs in play so the idea was you'd play it for 3 mana, turn it up for 1, then use its high mana cost to get big power off of something like Rush of Knowledge). It at least had a use, especially in Limited.

[@kargnak]

@@lseths I don't think anyone familiar with the ancient meme from Gatherer is going to mistake it for being a genuinely usel-ALL HAIL THE GREAT LORD EGOTIST!

[@funkydiscogod]

I remembered Takeno's Cavalry being an ok draft common. Half the creatures in the set were spirits, and they were all similarly underpowered, so 1 damage often was a big deal.

[@Snow_Fire_Flame]

I played quite a bit of Kamigawa block Limited, and... not really. Something weird is up if you're siding the Cavalry in, even in a spirit-heavy environment.

[@anoobindisguise4337]

I'm seeing a suspicious lack of a particular -1/-1 for 5 here lol

[@funkydiscogod]

I remember it being a 4/4, if you paid every color.

[@anoobindisguise4337]

@@funkydiscogod yeah paying wubrg for a 4/4 with a niche ability that shrinks it to a 2/2 or a 0/0 is still pretty aggressively terrible but at least it can sometimes be like a 5 mana do nothing 2/2. Just in particular the statline of -1/-1 is funny as shit. Maelstrom elemental was a 7/7 vanilla and it was godawful unplayable but spinal parasite is at least just a card that can win a game in theory, and there are a lot of creatures that can't

[@ReyosBlackwood]

13:43 or Zuran orb if you want to be able to sacrifice your lands multiple times (great if you have effects that let you play lands from grave, gets explosive when you sac and replay a Nykthos three times in a turn)

[@nicholasbarshaw4120]

Dawg how did the flailing cycle from mercadian masques not make it on the list

[@qjc1142pigs]

I think phantasmal sphere might be worse than wood elemental as it actively wins your opponent the game and taps you out every turn. It’s a 1U 0/1 flyer Which gets a counter each turn. This sounds kinda fine at first, however the caveats are many. You also have to Pay one for each counter on it. So it basically has cumulative upkeep 1 And when it leaves play, not dies LEAVES PLAY. It gives your opponent a */* flyer token (orb) equal to the number of counters on it. So it actively wins your opponent the game after making you out over multiple turns.

[@totalvoid6234]

Phantasmal sphere is by quite a margin better then Wood Elemental. Within the context of sealed its got a decent chance of winning the game for you. But mono green sealed (already a ludicrous notion) somehow getting a 16/16 for 20 is still not likely to break a stalemate.

[@qjc1142pigs]

@@totalvoid6234 in sealed players often have a much higher concentration of removal including bounce, got forbid they have multiple Bounce spells and you spend turns getting it to three power being forced to tap out and they bounce it, this could happen multiple times. That is actively hurting you. Or just wait for the 4th pay and get a 4/4 flyer with removal. I would rather have a dead card, that might do something super late game when I am otherwise out of resources than card that cuts me off of resources early game and gives my OP resources later. But we can both agree they are both awful And I do agree if your opponent has 0 interaction sphere does kill in 6 turns if you hit your land drops. So that might happen more than I think. Partially if we are playing alliances sealed specifically.

[@davidlundquist1979]

Bravo to Dripping Dead for somehow not appearing on this list. Though it's definitely worse than Aisling Leprechaun.

[@dustfinger_until_dawn]

Goblin firebug is playable in beamtown bullies commander decks. But i am surprised not seeing rust elemental

[@KenForee]

as a lad when Legions released, i genuinely thought it was awesome to have a red grizzly bears in Goblin Firebug

[@Mccheddah]

will their be more of these videos?

[@unanon_user]

The new desert Bloom Deck could definitely use creature number 9. it literally benefits from destroying your own lands, sending them to the graveyard and even bringing them back.

[@maikocat]

First, Aisling is pronounced "Ashling", second, if you pair it with the amazing 1 mana white aura "Green Ward", it becomes unkillable in combat. If it blocks or is blocked, its triggered ability goes off, turning the other creature green, but since it has protection from green, Leprechaun doesn't take any damage. A perfect combo!

[@hggfhh4449]

Also equipped with sword of harth and home.

[@bazzakrak]

Never played Magic I must admit, but I do enjoy watching your videos about it, looking back in the long history of this game And must say, you do look, at least for me, as the prototype of an elder Magic player with the long beard :D

[@robdostie192]

I actually play the alabaster leech (plus the red and green ones) in a jank kitchen table deck. Its actually really fun to play and can win occasionally. Main threat is Marath so leeches help him enter bigger. Lots of ramp and the rest of the spells are colorless. Admit the leeches will always suck but I'd take them over a goblin firebug, zephyr spirit, or a merchant ship any day.

[@TheUnspeakeable]

Take into account that Takeno's cavalry was printed in the Kamigawa block, where a lot of creatures were spirits

[@spootyfly412]

Thanks for reminding me that Goblin Firebug is a thing. That goes into my Zedruu deck.

[@stephenhousman6975]

7:00 Here is the obligatory Seth not understanding the card moment. During t6 it would phase back out if you didn't pay the cost so turn 7 it will come in as a 3/3 if you decide to pay the cost. If you didn't then it will be a 4/4 turn 8. Still bad but you forgot about it phasing back out on upkeep.

[@residentgrey]

Squirrels + card that turns everything into a forest + Wood Elemental = One Yuge Nut...pick any token strat that can play the convertor card and You Are There.

[@targetplayer]

#6 is worse than you think. Since morph wouldn't appear for 6 more years, everyone represented phasing out by turning the card upside down. So you'd have to slide the dice/coins/etc. off #6 and back onto it repeatedly. And it's still better than the other of the first two UG cards, in the same set, which is basically The One Ring - for your opponent.

[@hurkersmm]

I've always been a big fan of Mercenaries. What more could you want in a rare than a hill giant with downside.

[@christopherschafer2146]

merchant ship actually has a use, in jon irenicus you can donate it an opponent without islands you draw the game and it’s the cheapest way to do it

[@cat-astrophe8697]

What many people seem to forget about Wood Elemental is that you dont need lands to pay its Mana cost! You could also use mana dorks, imagine the card in an elf-shell and then you could easily see yourself dropping this Monster on Turn 4 or so and sacrificing 4 lands for a 4/4!

[@davidmcnelley8672]

Primordial ooze sounds fun to give to the opponent to have them burn themselves out.

[@Tinil0]

They should remake merchant ship as a group hug card. Something like When you attack a target opponent, they gain 1 life, draw 1 card, and gain 1 mana of any color, while you gain twice those amounts. Capitalism, ho!

[@thekkidd3d]

Don't forget that Leech took a rare slot in a pack. Just to add some injury to the insult.

[@ThymeTwister]

Goblin Firebug really hammers in how Ironclaw Orcs actually was good enough to run in the Sligh decks of that time. 2/2 for 2 with a minor downside was actually somehow good enough to win top tier games then.

[@ThymeTwister]

Of course, nowadays you can get a 3/2 with upside for 2 mana fairly easily, so all the 2/2s with downsides are basically now consigned to the annals of magic history

[@StarshadowMelody]

I think it'd be possible to build around Wood Elemental, but it'd get overshadowed by other things that benefit better from land ramping a fudgezillion forests out. Oh, and you need to give it Trample or evasion so it doesn't get blocked- so, y'know, overshadowed.

[@AMassiveHeadache]

goblin firebug and primordial ooze seem like they could at least be put in a gift giving commander deck. also ooze with shadowspear and a lifegain synergy would be funny

[@TwoCentReview]

Primordial Ooze could actually work as a reliable engine to damage yourself to synergize with effects that go off of you having low life. I’m sure that there are faster ways to do this, but it’s at least a low cost onvestment, because you only have to pay 1 red to do damage to yourself forever, if that’s what you really want to do…

[@Infernoman64]

Hey hey! Goblin firebug can be decent in...the new desert commander from Thunder Junction?

[@CalebvanderLeek]

I plau a Hazezon Commander deck and was thinking just that - I love my Deserts in the graveyard

[@Pug8]

I remember once seeing a magic card in the late 2000s on top of the trash can at my LGS in the game room. I was like who would do this?!?!? Then I found it was a zephyr spirit and promptly returned it to the trash. myself.

[@LeoSchrey]

4:40 I hope that "literally" isn't meant literally or else Spinal Parasite will never forgive you.

[@Mick.Griffiths]

@MTGGoldfish , since Bruvac the Grandiloquent doubles the amount of cards an opponent mills and Maddening Cacophony (kicked) mills half the opponents deck rounded up. Would pairing them mill the opponents entire deck?

[@seandun7083]

Yes.

[@kamikazehansu]

Wood Elemental can be tutored for in Titania in EDH

[@v4eCTR]

We shall not forget that Jasconius exists

[@Atmapalazzo]

Zephyr Spirit's reason for existing the only reason WotC needs to pink slip MaRo

[@jekanyika]

Aisling is normally pronounce d as Ashling

[@PM-ut6sy]

Thanks for pointing it out already, the way he pronounces it in the video was so painful (no offense Seth :)). I personally wouldn't pronounce the end as "ling"; more like "lin".

[@jekanyika]

@@PM-ut6sy I've know two Aislings and one of them people called Ashlin and the other people called Ashling. I just went with the crowd.

[@number4497]

Imo if you want to make merchant ship thematic and at least a bit stronger, give it islandwalk and have the reward being drawing a card or two when it successfully “returns”

[@maileesaeya3614]

Ah Wood Elemental. A card I've long argued isn't just the worst creature in Magic, but literally the worst CARD in Magic (from a strict gameplay value POV). After all, even something as bad as One With Nothing is at least good for the meme, and Seth DID get someone to counter it! (once)

[@06mustangCE]

If Wood Elemental had the added ability of Tap to add green mana equal to its power or toughness it wouldn't have been quite so horrible.

[@jy-az-33]

11:11 seabound? We used to call that islandhome.

[@ryangainey94]

I don't think you described phasing quite accurately. You're talking about the Warping Wurm going away every other turn but when something phases out it phases in with the untap step. In a way, the card is both better and worse than how you described it. On one hand, it pumps itself faster than what you said it did. On the other hand, it ceases to exist every single turn that you don't pay the cost, as opposed to every other turn. It isn't a turn 10 4/4, it would be a turn 10 6/6 ish, but it's one that wouldn't exist most of the time. So depending on how you look at it, it's better or worse than you think it is. Also, in theory you could build a janky control deck with the warping wurm as your win condition, and use the fact that it keeps phasing out to repeatedly wipe the board but the wurm survives all the wipes and keeps getting stronger because it's always phased out when you wipe

[@smood3598]

Well, actually Wood Elemental makes sence if you have something to bring destroyed lands back and proc massive landfalls, like Aftermath Analyst. It is for sure WAS a horrible card, but not when you have Landfall creatures and ways to massively revive you lands.

[@joeabib]

Pfft, you never lost to the Aisling Leprechaun Green Ward unstoppable combo.

[@nate983]

Aisling is pronounced “Ash-ling”

[@inzombiac345]

some great cards for a Momir Vig Format, Jon Irenicus. loves bad creatures it can give to oppo ( Bad Santa decks) Zedruu the Greathearted. gifts bad stuff and gains life and cards for it. so all the bad can work well for you in oppo control. :)

[@santhanamkumar862]

Odd...merchant ship is the most powerful card in my fastest EDH deck...

[@KeroTheInvincible]

I can easily do you one better on the Leprechaun. Shelkin Brownie is a 2 mana 1/1 from the same set, in the same colour, is creature type Ouphe instead of Faerie (Faeries have at least SOME support cards, while Ouphes have none), and has the INCREDIBLE ability where you may tap Shelkin Brownie to remove the "Bands With Other-" keyword from a single creature until end of turn. Read more if you dare; Not even Banding, specifically "Bands With Other". A keyword that doesn't exist natively on any printed tournament-legal creature in Magic. A particular token from a particular bad rare from Legends can have it. A joke card from Unhinged, explicitly parodying useless keywords has it. Legendary creatures can get Bands With Other Legends from a cycle of lands from Legends that can't even tap for mana. What's worse, even if you somehow DO manage to face off against someone using Bands With Other, you have to use the effect preemptively, since removing Banding doesn't break up a band that's already been formed. And even if you DO remove Bands With Other from a creature, only ONE of those creatures actually NEEDS the keyword, meaning they'll be able to band anyway! And even if you WERE in the market for that effect, Tolaria can do the same thing for ALL Banding, on a land, that can still tap for a blue mana! Even a 2 mana 1/1 is a card, and technically be used. But Shelkin Brownie is at the very least a contender for "most useless ability of all time".