Love vs. People Pleasing | The Life Coach School Podcast with Brooke Castillo Ep

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In this episode, I shine the spotlight on the difference between love and people pleasing. I explain why unconditional love often gets misinterpreted and what you need to do to create and foster genuine relationships with the people you care about.
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About This Video:
In this video I am discussing the difference between loving, unconditional loving, and people pleasing. Unconditional love is something that we do for ourselves. It’s a beautiful choice that we can make towards someone, no matter what they do. People don’t have to change in order for us to love them, people don’t have to behave in a certain way for us to love them - we can love them no matter what. When we do that, we feel the feelings of love in our body.
This does not mean that we love people at our own expense. That is the opposite of unconditional love.
Unconditional love has to always start with you, and unconditionally loving other people is also about you. You will know the difference because of how you feel.
Lying is people pleasing - people pleasing is lying, and that is not unconditional love for yourself. That’s lying about who you are, and not loving yourself with the condition of how you actually feel.
So how do you start loving yourself first?
Unconditional love for yourself and others always includes the truth, and loving them no matter how they respond to the truth.
People pleasing feels like resentment, and bends to peoples wills. Unconditional love is telling people the truth - and then loving someone regardless of how they respond. That is truth and unconditional love, that is not people pleasing.
People pleasing and unconditional love are never happening at the same time.
The challenge of unconditional love starts with yourself - do you love yourself enough to tell the truth? Will you love yourself after you say the truth out loud, and deal with any consequences after you say the truth?
People pleasing feels amazing in the moment, because you get the response you want. Unconditional love feels good in the long term, because you are speaking your truth and honoring yourself, and loving yourself regardless of the outcome.
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