Things You Should NEVER Say to Wedding Vendors

[@src4409]

Ok...a few things here: 1. Don't ask a photographer to change their style. I can understand this because it is a precise artistry. However, most florists, djs, designers, etc. will attempt to do what you request no matter what their style is. 2. The email thing could just have been that they have looked at so many photographers and got the names mixed up. Brides are tired and stressed. They aren't getting paid to ask for services. 3. People that say a photographer is their dream... might actually be telling the truth. If you emailed them back with your prices and they were out of their price range.. they are dealing with a ton of disappointment. Letting you know that you're out of their price range feels weird.... like a sketchy way to get you to lower your price. 4. Don't ask for price matching, and discounts aren't fair. I can see not asking for a price match for a 2k difference .. that's a lot, but if it's a 500$ difference and they don't want the engagement session or they want an hour less of time... why not ask? I mean it could be on a date you might not have had booked at all.. like a Thursday. Also, there's absolutely nothing unfair about running a special price for a period of time or for certain days of the week. No one feels jipped that they didn't get that price if they missed the cut off date. If you're successful enough to not need to run specials then so be it... but you're only going to be a photographer for a higher income clientele... not more budget brides.

[@delightfullife9489]

awesome video from the perspective of a great photographer! I recently booked my wedding photographer...she is about $800 over the budget I had anticipated but I LOVE her style/work/personality and she is very experienced at the venue. Your video makes me feel good that I went with her instead of an cheaper one.💛💛💛

[@cavinelizabeth]

lol so glad!! I've never heard anybody say they regret going over budget on photos so I'm sure you'll feel great about it once you get the photos back!

[@jayen5751]

Thank you so much for this video! I was guilty in trying to change the vendors style, I now know better! Thank you 🙏

[@cavinelizabeth]

Glad it was helpful!

[@dawnsteel4637]

LOVE!!! ALL couples should see this!

[@cavinelizabeth]

haha yes!!

[@catherinewhitehead8839]

I love your photography style, such a shame your not closer to us here in New Zealand. Thanks for the videos though, they are helping select a good vendor =)

[@cavinelizabeth]

If you live anywhere near Hobbiton I will 100% try to work with you on a good package haha!!

[@catherinewhitehead8839]

@@cavinelizabeth We will be getting married in Auckland, which is around 2 hours away from Hobbiton so pretty close

[@fizzaith]

What's the best way to communicate to your photographer that you've never loved looking at photos of yourself? My fiance and I have engagement photos coming up this summer, and while I'm excited to have professional photos done for the first time, we're both plus sized and have always cringed at photos of ourselves. Our photographer is well trained in posing and portraits, and I don't want to inadvertently insult her by saying we're nervous about seeing photos of ourselves. What's a good way to communicate our concerns to our photographer?

[@cavinelizabeth]

I totally don't think it's insulting :) I would share past photos of yourselves with her that show examples of what you don't like and what you do like. It's so helpful to see both things! You can talk to her too about angles you prefer or angles you want to minimize in the photos. I know I would definitely appreciate my clients being open before we shoot photos so I can do my best knowing what they don't feel comfortable about before it's too late. You can talk through some solutions and hopefully that will really help!

[@user-uz7bt9th3d]

What’s the best way to handle emails from a videographer that keeps emailing? I inquired and did a brief zoom meeting with a videographer when I first started reaching out to vendors, but have not signed on with them yet; while video would be nice to have of our day, videography is not an absolute must for us. We want to see quotes from the other vendors first before we make our decision on if we will hire a videographer or not. (We already hired a photographer whose work we absolutely love, but they don’t do video, hence the separate videography vendor) However, we are not meeting with our other vendors until much later this year and I don’t want to seem flaky to the videographer in case we do decide to hire them. 😅

[@cavinelizabeth]

I'd say: Hi X, Thanks for reaching out and checking in. We are undecided on video at this point in time and have a few other people to speak with before making our decision. It will likely be closer to the end of the year before we can make that decision. I will follow up with you if we have more questions or would like to move forward. Have a wonderful Fall! Best, X

[@lorenaholloway1439]

My wedding coordinator reached out to a florist for me & sent me a proposal over which included a garland, loose greenery, & a boutonniere. During that same weekend my photographer found a florist who would make me a bouquet for my budget so I booked that with her & she included a complimentary boutonniere. Since the contract with the other florist hadn’t been signed I called to ask if she could remove the boutonniere & I mentioned that I someone was making me one for free. I just didn’t want her to think I didn’t trust her making me one sit that’s why I mentioned it. First thing Monday morning I got an email from my coordinator saying I insulted her florist & that she will no longer be working for me. Do you think me mentioning that I was getting one for free was rude? I would love to get your point of view because I did not see it or mean it that way at all otherwise I would’ve never said that. I do regret saying that at all but it is what it is & now I’m trying to find a new coordinator when we’re a month away from my wedding :/ I thought I had been so polite & kind to all my vendors so hearing that truly shocked me & really put me down. I’d love to hear what you think!

[@cavinelizabeth]

Sorry I just saw this! It does sound like the coordinator acted very hastily and dramatically. Doesn't seem that professional to me. It's possible she felt that you didn't trust her or that the photographer was overstepping their place (I'm not saying that either of those things are true, just speculating). A florist proposal isn't set in stone, it's just a proposal, so I don't think the florist or the coordinator should have been upset you went in a different direction. Sounds like you saved yourself from working with a coordinator who wasn't right for you! :)

[@jencasey316]

How would you tell a vendor respectfully that something in thier pricing is outrageous. My photographer recommended a videographer but we didnt want any of the extra editing and music over our videos - I'm a musician and have very very carefully planned out and even mixed my own music for our ceremony and special dances (basically everything that I want on video) so I just want the raw video so I have things exactly as have worked hard to arrange them. However when I asked for a stripped down package without all the extras that he usually provides he quoted me DOUBLE his regular rate. I cant imagine paying double for half the work and find that absolutely outrageous so I just havent answered yet as I just dont know what to say. Also do you consider things like "we want a photo of us ringing the church bell" to be a shot list? Because there are some specific and unusual things we have planned and that we definitely want photographed that she wont know about unless we give her a list.

[@cavinelizabeth]

I would just move on to another option rather than trying to tell them their pricing is "outrageous." They might have a good reason for doing so in regards to protecting their work and process. On the note of photos, if ringing the bell is part of the day then they wouldn't need that on a list as they should be capturing all of those events that are occuring around them. If you more so mean that you want to sneak off to get a photo of that moment and it's not part of the ceremony, then you can mention that. A shot list is a list of multiple photos, not just 1-2 requested photos :)

[@jencasey316]

@@cavinelizabeth So should I just ghost him then? I feel that that is even more rude than telling someone that raising the price when I asked to cut out the majority of the package (exactly how you said you would be willing to negotiate to a lower price) is the reason why we arent going to use him, especially since he said he would hold the date. As for photos I have about 30-40 specific shots I want that are outside the "norm" most to bring in bits of people who arent here any longer - recreations of my Grandma's photos since I'm wearing her dress and I want to be able to put them side by side in a frame Grandma and granddaughter in the same pose in the same dress and definitely a bunch that were her with her sister with my Great Aunt to show the passage of time. The bell is outside the church so that would be after our receiving line is over or she will have to bolt out while my bridal party holds everyone hostage inside so we can do it then make it into the receiving line - otherwise it will have to be after everyone has left, it isnt part of the ceremony but something Father lets people do if they want as they leave (the kids try so hard to pull the rope every Sunday!)

[@cavinelizabeth]

I would just tell him you're going in a different directions. Do be aware that the request you had given him is very uncommon and might make a lot of videographers uncomfortable. I personally would never hand over the raw files to my clients and let them have a go at finalizing the work. Honestly with as much control as you're asking for, you'd probably be better off having someone just set up a camera on a tripod for the ceremony. That'd be free :)

[@jencasey316]

@@cavinelizabeth I think you are completely misunderstanding. His standard package is 1 highlight reel, one trailer, and one full video of the whole day with added soundtrack. I asked if I could drop the highlight reel and the trailer because I didnt want them and would never watch them and if he could not add the soundtrack to the video - just leave in the audio exactly as it records. I was not asking to edit the video or get it in editable form - just to not have anything editted out time line wise (no cutting communion because that is when people will be singing my favorite songs) or added in (cause then you cant hear the people chattering in the background). I was literally asking to remove 3 items from his package, not for something he doesnt give every couple. And for that he doubled the price. I was happy to accept it on DVD as is his standard, I just wanted to keep things as if you were sitting in the church when you watched (or in the hall for the dances). So it isnt asking for something uncommon - just to get rid of the other bits. Which is how you said you would be willing to negotiate a lower price - by removing things from your package. I've already gotten requests for a reason why I'm not going to be using him, I just need a better way of wording it according to your video.

[@angel_bonzai]

@@jencasey316 maybe the videographer doesn't want your business. The only reason they will double rge price. Other thing is that posdibly what you wanted them to do is hard to pull off - they have done packages repeatly and sonething so dfifferent will tgrow tgrm off their game.

[@FM-ny7xh]

Nice videos! Do you help in creating a photography timeline to help insert your timeline into the master timeline?

[@cavinelizabeth]

Yes I work very closely with the planner and bride to make an awesome timeline! And I just filmed a full timeline video that's going live next week :)