This Mother was Violently Kidnapped from the UK and Kept in Turkey | Paradise Lost

After a whirlwind holiday romance, British teenager Joanne Horsfall moves to Turkey where she gives birth to a son. But her idyllic new life soon becomes a prison. And when she tries to escape she is violently kidnapped.
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[@Dontcomeformepeople]

I will never understand people that go to other countries don’t understand their cultures and then marry into the family and are shocked at how they’re treated. It’s just pure stupidity. Nobody deserves to be beaten or treated awfully but if that’s the norm and it’s an accepted norm you’re asking for horrible, horrible endings

[@yesimkaptanoglu7586]

it is a fake story

[@davidklein8252]

@@yesimkaptanoglu7586 Says the fool with a Turkish name.

[@mel-wc9ep]

​@@yesimkaptanoglu7586 Are you wifebeater also?

[@3rrlia661]

@@davidklein8252 says the bully with a jewish name

[@janinaclarke3265]

Not fake😮

[@tinaturnerization]

This is why I would never marry outside of my culture, respectively.. I would never want to endure this BS if I were to ever get a divorce

[@Lipstick81]

This story frustrates me . I have too much to say I’d be here for 24 hours writing .. the father witness’s his daughter being abused in public and just stood there amongst 1000 other things here ..sorry Joanne but … ( fill in the blank )

[@mrbruce7401]

When that happened in front of father I was shocked that her story did say anything about her father's reaction he must of it is a natural instinct of anyone to stop & get in the middle and as a barrier but she seems to portray as a person who is all about themselves so it's all about her & her story & not known what TV edited for final production,,, if anyone done that to my daughter in front of me would got the nearest glass or bottle in the neck

[@Lipstick81]

@@mrbruce7401 this is true . I agree with you. She completely disregarded everyone but herself then wondered why her life went the way it did .

[@hfrt29]

That's what my dad did. And when you're under coercive control it's difficult to get out

[@Lipstick81]

@@hfrt29 🥺this is true too

[@davidklein8252]

Living somewhere for years and not learning the language is a massive mistake. When I moved abroad, I had no contact with English-speakers for the first year to make I wouldn't be in that situation.

[@itsruckaswife7036]

@@davidklein8252 I know - how can you live in a foreign country for three years and not speak the language??? My husband is danish and I learned it in a year and got a job. In turkey NOBODY speaks more than basic English apart from interpreters… foolish to say the least

[@Deb.-.]

@@itsruckaswife7036 She was actually there for 6 years. The boy was 3 when he abused her but she stayed another 3 years, so 6 in total.

[@mtc9683]

Well I live surrounded by brits that live here for decades and don´t speak a word of Spanish like a brit told me we don´t need to learn since in all places, shops etc they speak English, she has been here for 30 years, I volunteer as an interpreter at the health center so I know what I am talking about, it is disrespectful and then they have a sense of superiority and expect others to cater to them too, like being upset because the Doctors do not speak English, cognitive dissonance I tell them, you are living in Spain our language is Spanish

[@davidklein8252]

@@mtc9683 I agree. It's ridiculous.

[@MichelleVanCooley]

THIS WOMAN LIVED WITH A BLIND EYE TO THE CULTURE, SHE REFUSED TO ACCLIMATIZE--SHE SHOULD HAVE INVESTIGATED THE CULTURE AND STOPPED LIVING IN A ROMANTIC FANTASY WORLD BEFORE SHE DECIDED TO STAY THERE

[@annatarassow-niechcial6094]

But she knows! she was from England! all women in Europe know who are turkish man!!

[@eringallacher9040]

How she and her family handled this just angers me. Not a brain cell or any fight in them.

[@ekno2506]

'although she'd lost Oliver, Joanne managed to start fresh'. She moved to a new town, found herself a job and a new boyfriend ' This was the point I lost all symapthy for this woman.

[@Wjill2]

The minute she said “Turkey” I checked out! If you’re dumb enough to relocate or even visit Turkey as an American well, then…

[@lionizamayola2520]

turkey has one of the highest rates of femicide in Europe, and domestic violence is a significant problem. In 2021, Turkey withdrew from the Istanbul Convention, which was an international treaty aimed at combating domestic violence and femicide. Why would she fight a losing battle? Would you travel and sit in turkish court as female and foreign?

[@feyhanemli1507]

@@ekno2506 me too

[@feyhanemli1507]

@@lionizamayola2520 absolutely correct as a Türk I should know but the men that I’ll treat women are the uneducated peasants

[@lizelle5254]

For someone who has so many words now to speak she surely didnt have any words multiple times when she could have saved herself and her son. Wow i would have shouted at rocks if i had the chance 😮😮

[@genniferpaulgomez3028]

You weren't in her shoes, when abuse becomes an addiction, the only way out is death. I admire Joanne, for the courage of choosing life over death.

[@ewaboyle2310]

First thing you do, is store your own passport and get your child a passport! Also, giving birth in Britain would have been a smart idea… Once you become a mother you have to be ready to protect your child! I am not judging anyone, just something that I would think about. If the guy takes away your passport, don’t have his baby and marry him. Huge red flag!

[@ioanamaria309]

She has a prisoner since marriage .But din t know it..

[@ylocoslovakia]

Glad to see everybody is alive and doing well except for the bad memories for Joanne.

[@MY-zx6lz]

Should have done your homework before marrying a Turk - they have all rights!

[@saritacruz3020]

She seems unbothered about leaving her child behind with an abusive man.

[@itsruckaswife7036]

I was thinking the same… I would have gone to the police or even stayed in turkey to be with my child

[@kittensncasket]

Feelings aren't facts..She did what she was supposed to do and let him go with his dad as she was permitted to by law. He was violent to her not his son

[@TinaMcGregor]

Y'all have no clue unless you've walked in those shoes how you'd respond/react my children was stolen from me 1991 about the same time this happened to her. I too was married to a wealthy diaper head that threatened to shoot them in the face ages 1,3,5, me then himself if I fought him in court. She's lucky to have a relationship with her son as an adult. Mine were brainwashed into hating me my middle child died 13 years ago she was 26 my oldest 40 and youngest 35 still no relationship.

[@itsruckaswife7036]

@@kittensncasketso you would leave your child with a violent man in another country and just fly home and get a new house and a new boyfriend? Honestly she is a terrible mother by anyone’s standards. If she hadn’t have been kidnapped she never would have made any effort to see her son again. Poor little boy

[@itsruckaswife7036]

@@TinaMcGregor her child wasn’t stolen. She abandoned him. I’m really sorry that happened to you 🥲

[@cw4091]

It’s a peaceful religion.

[@He4venlyBody]

Girl wat. You bovered over the breakfast smh

[@ljones5576]

This B is insane

[@Borderlinegoldenretriever]

This story should warn everyone again not to get involved with men from countries like that

[@3rrlia661]

really?! old ladies like to get involved with men in countries like that. And they are quite ok.

[@kingpriapatius5832]

100%.

[@Pines.n.poppies]

Poor child stuck in the middle of this...

[@shirleytitterington3207]

A young girl wouldn't have thought through or realised at such a young age in Turkey what would happen. Very sad, but a warning to young people to not take countries their not familiar with to live so lightly

[@todorstoyanov1111]

Because they don't know the history of this country. If they knew they would know what might happen.

[@fabiwilliams4644]

Holiday romances rarely end well especially in poorer countries

[@Emy53]

How does anyone kidnap someone from the UK, and fly to Turkey, without being stopped by authorities, unless they hire a private ship or yacht.

[@margaretr5701]

They were stopped, kept overnight in cells, she didn't press charges.

[@johnnylambert2.0]

She was taken by ferry boat to France and driven, she didn’t fly, the authorities in Türkiye stopped them, I guess the time it took for Interpol to get the notice out to all boarders was a slower process in those days💁🏽

[@Anna-bv1om]

​@@johnnylambert2.0They were stopped by Bulgarian authorities. She did not speak Bukgarian. I think she could speak Turkish. She communicated with his extended family, obviously, English is not common in smaller places Turkey, except tourist industry.

[@paradise6606]

So sick of these KZbin videos blasting music while trying to listen to someone with a strong accent.

[@sallyjones9702]

I live in Greece and met my husband here in the mid 1980s. He was never abusive or controlling but I knew many European women who did moonlight flits with their children to get away from unhealthy marriages. It’s very difficult to know someone well enough to commit when you don’t speak the language. You don’t understand how they behave with friends and family, how they speak to shop assistants, restaurant staff etc and this is all part of seeing the character of someone. You also have to study/observe the culture and honestly decide if you can adapt. If you’re prepared to learn the language because without that you’ll never have the respect of the people. You might think that you have, but you really don’t believe me! You’ll always be an outsider. I did and read and write but many really struggle despite living here for many years and raising children so think long and hard before making your decision.

[@sheilaboston7051]

Aussie here, lived in Greece in the mid-80's for two years. A friend had married a Greek and her life was OK and her husband good, but he was still a little controlling in the way of the culture - it was (still is?) a patriarchal system. I also had to toe the line, so that I didn't embarrass them. It was fine for a while but I realised that it wasn't the life for me - I'm too independent. You're totally correct in that you must the language in order to truly understand the people you're living alongside and the culture. Interesting point is, we both learned Greek but her husband never even tried to learn English ...

[@sheilacarter7875]

How did they find her she said she moved to a new town, l can't believe her dad just sat there without confronting the husband.Terrible for the little boy,it never ends well when marriage to someone from another country fails especially.wben there are children.

[@sarahivsutterb747]

All women and girls should read the book with the title : Not without my daughter! written from Betty Mahmoody who was married to an Iranian man and he had been holding her and her daughter captive in Iran and treated her and her daughter like prisoners! Betty took her daughter and fled in a mind-boggling escape to Turkey and went to the embassy of the USA and was finally able to return to the USA to get divorced and to be free again! Her daughter got Lupus after all the stress and trauma of her captivity but she and her mother had finally a better life after all and the man who had done it got a lifelong ban to come to the USA again! That's a little bit of the story of this book and a good advice to never ever marry someone who comes from a Muslim country - never ever! That's it! Period, end of story!

[@alejandraahmed1177]

There is also a book titled, "At the drop of the veil". An American woman married to a Saudi man in the 1950's.

[@141Lav]

Also there is a film based on the book ‘Not without my Daughter’ with Sally Field. Very Good.

[@MichelleVanCooley]

SHE WAS MARRIED AND WENT LOOKING FOR A 'NEW MAN" SHE SEEMS TO THINK ONLY OF HERSELF,

[@sheilaboston7051]

She'd been back in the UK for two years and her marriage was dead.

[@tessajowett6973]

How does any mother leave a child behind??

[@empfangwien521]

This lady does not seem very intelligent..........she let her son decide in which cell and with whom he will stay for the night, behind bars?? He's a kid, MOM! YOU decide!

[@todorstoyanov1111]

But it was Turkey not UK there the mail child has more power than her.

[@mare4685]

A bit naive...

[@LH-ot5rk]

To put it mildly!

[@lenabeves6817]

I wouldn't use the word naive...

[@A.Kargbo]

A bit?

[@lisawise9849]

You couldn't pay me to go vacation in ANY ISLAMIC COUNTRY.

[@janicemerchant-blakely4866]

What a frightening story!!

[@munchie2u]

Reminds me of the movie “Not Without My Child” with Sally Fields. Similar situations, as far as abusive men and only allowed to leave if she left her child behind. The difference is one mother planned and left with her child and one didn’t. Huge difference in mentality and motherhood. IMHO.

[@hisukserjeant5204]

She is unbelievably naive🤣🤣🤣

[@leanderrowe2800]

Holiday to a new country or a noval place by itself is romantic already. So falling in love during holiday can be fooling, especially with the locals. Don't fall into this trap.

[@johnmcdonald9295]

She was fortunate to get out ,those 2 women from Northern Ireland got wiped out in Turkey by a waiter,Marion Graham ,Cathy Dinsmore

[@shellyseymore6249]

I'd never go abroad as a young woman alone *anywhere,* in the world, let alone to a place where women aren't as free as we are in western cultures. I'm not trying to be derogatory about places like Turkey, and middle eastern countries, it's just a matter of fact. I'd gladly go and enjoy those places with a group of friends, or with my husband. But why on EARTH would I put myself in a situation where I'd be unprepared, unprotected and unsafe?? 🤷🏽‍♀️

[@nasraa2056]

First she abandoned her friend she was travelling with and then few years later she abandoned her son.

[@suzanneseiple191]

Ignorance is bliss till it isn’t 🙄

[@fabiwilliams4644]

Love with rose coloured glasses

[@judithgibson4291]

Always learn the language of the country you are living in. You have the atvantage

[@Anna-bv1om]

Not true in mid eastern countries. You are second rate anyway with no family and friends. I mean the justice system and public institutions. It was very true in the eighties and nineties.

[@Ann-sj4pt]

Away from the main cities and resorts,most places are very “backwards” and women hating.

[@feyhanemli1507]

Leaving your kid just for a guy😢she's no good

[@Anna-bv1om]

her kid was born and raised in Turky. Her husband was mean to her only. Her son was loved by his family. And her life in Britain wasn't easy.

[@snappysnoopy1482]

What on earth is wrong with that woman?? Interpol had her back, yet she didn't press charges for kidnapping or fight for custody. Instead she let that monster keep the custody of her son, only to be raised by a misogynist!

[@GloxGlox-nl4cd]

People do not realize how different some cultures are, especially when you are a female and grow up with western ideals. I was married to a Turkish man in the US in 1987. He tried to convince me to go to Turkey with him and my two young children. Said he wanted to bring us to introduce us to his family. I told him that he could go see his family and I would bring the children to see mine for that vacation. When I got to my family's place I received a divorce decree. There had been no mention that he planned to do that. One of the last things he said to me was "the thing that I hate most about you is how American you are honey." Honestly I am really happy to be such an aware citizen of such a wonderful country! I will keep my freedom and be extremely greatful for it.

[@hfrt29]

I love how all of these comments are blaming the victim. This world is twisted

[@lesgensdeprovenceontlaparo6531]

Any place outside of Istanbul in the 1980s in Turkey (even today) were and continue to be waaay behind the western world and where English is not spoken.

[@Anna-bv1om]

Was she kidnapped with her passport? How did they managed to cross all those borders without documents? In 1996 borders were not so open like today.

[@lesgensdeprovenceontlaparo6531]

What kind of a business owner is he that he spends all this time with a tourist instead of overseeing his hotel?

[@jennt7573]

How many times must she say “you know”

[@judithgibson4291]

What a dreadful experience poor woman

[@feyhanemli1507]

Turks don't were fez

[@suz1017]

I don't for one minute think she should have suffered any vio/dom/abus53 nor been $muggl3d or k!dn@pp3d but all I hear is me, me, what's best for me. There didn't appear to be much of a fight for her son at all. Why didn't she learn about the culture or language and integrate more with her husband's family and the community when she was willing to live with and bring up a family with her Turkish husband? Did she not realise that it would also benefit her son to be in a community, in whichever country, of which his mother is part of? Thank God the boy is now a young man at university and I wish him a successful future 🙏

[@destinymydestiny5449]

I would never leave behind my child , I would stay there close to him. But sorry to tell but u are a selfish mother.

[@sandrawilson1520]

Why are these women surprised, cultures don't mix

[@todorstoyanov1111]

The film was done in Bulgaria not in Turkey....... Why?

[@valerieryan9329]

She believe anything aman or woman told there or where she lived b4 this adventure. His personality and hers.

[@DeanLeadbetter]

In a muslim land, other mentality

[@erikaso404]

Nonsense

[@JudithRandall-vz1zk]

She's a free spirit, an unconventional woman, goes wherever she wants and fears nothing, until she gets herself in trouble and then runs home to her family, putting them in danger and domineering their lives with her problems. She just doesn't seem like a very likeable person.

[@kingpriapatius5832]

What did she expect from Muslim Turkish misogynists? What kind of criteria do these women have..?

[@N.NilM.]

What is this Turkey representation? The sepia filter and Arabic music. I thought I could go through with this since I love true crime but I just couldn’t stop laughing when I saw the guy wearing fes 😂 are you kidding me? Have you ever seen Turkey? And this is how many years ago, people were even more open then. Unsubscribe

[@todorstoyanov1111]

Turkey even the President wife wears head scarf......

[@N.NilM.]

@@todorstoyanov1111 ​​⁠I mean, the representation overall is not correct. For the last 20 years Turkey has become more conservative under the current regime, but before it was not like this. Thats why I made this comment, from what you watch you would think it is an arabic country

[@yorgunkirmizi]

@@todorstoyanov1111 Yeah? That means people wear Fes and all women wear a headscarf? Turkey is always represented as a middle eastern arabic country and its simply incorrect. Just because some people wear headscarf doesnt mean we are arabs! No matter what the current regime does, we are a SECULAR country, we are NOT Arabs, we have our OWN language, our OWN culture. Now go do some research before you comment.

[@todorstoyanov1111]

@@yorgunkirmizi Some parts are filmed in Sozopol what is your problem?

[@todorstoyanov1111]

@@yorgunkirmizi I know which parts are more European and which are not.

[@pinkpugginz]

Why didnt she just fly out of country with her son?

[@RhonaMartin-j4t]

No money or passport

[@raeli2229]

@@pinkpugginz cause that would be kidnapping. Which she did anyway when she didn't return to Turkey with him after visiting her parents. Her son was born in Turkey. Even if it's hard one has to go by and through law.

[@margaretr5701]

@@RhonaMartin-j4t Her family could have helped. Or the British embassy.

[@johnnylambert2.0]

@@margaretr5701this was back in the 80’s, much different to these days, no mobile telephones and emails, it would have been even harder in Türkiye as a foreigner, as he was a Hotelier even he would have been well connected with any local travel agent too, she really was stuck, unless her family had come and basically brought her to the British Embassy, but that would have been a several hour drive to Ankara. Very difficult situation indeed.

[@1961Jannie]

@@johnnylambert2.0 Agree, things were a lot different back then. Married my Greek husband in '78 (we met in UK when he was student) & moved to Greece in '89 with our 3 kids. Completely different living in another country to visiting on hols. Learning the language is essential if you wish to integrate. I don't believe though, that I would have married someone who had never lived outside of their country and in my own as they would never have understood the English mentality. The internet has brought cultures closer in that nowadays, one can find more info online about another country and their customs etc.

[@her_limerence]

F'd around and found out