The world arise out of Lila, is born out of Love, not by lack, but our of a place of fullness, the One becomes many. That's why the jiva must learn how to make love to return to The Land of Love, one in which no man returns, yet only out of God's Love and his love for God, which branches out to all jivas and fallen souls in dire need of fervent prayer. The prayers of Guru is very powerful I assume. And all believers, because God listens to His children, because He finds that obedience is more pleasing than acts of sacrifice, because in obedience we are sacrificing out of love not out of fear. But if one must gain pious merits than fear is good for obstaining from willful repetitive sin. The only way is to be forgiven. But self hate can prevent you from having enough courage to love.