Toxic family members in Pakistan

[@pk-si6hq]

💯 I agree with you been through this as a British Pakistani when ever I go pakistan every so often my dad's older brother and his family have always tried to control us saying exactly what you describe in this video my uncle who also lived in the same house was also treated like this so eventually he moved out into his own house in the same village and he says it's the best decision he made he says he can move freely without getting hassle from relatives eat sleep and do whatever he wants, he also advised me to go and explore pakistan and learn things yourself so you don't need to rely on anyone and learn the Pakistani system he said staying indoors won't allow you to gain knowledge and since last October me and my father went back home so that he can transfer his share of inheritance to me and my older brother we were treated badly both me and my father. The funniest thing is that over 40 years my father never asked for a penny off his older brother neither he asked how much money he made off the crops (oranges and wheat) and his older brother and his wife had the nerve to pull a face but I tell you 1 thing me and my brother went back in June to start on our own house the uncle and his family realised that we now have the lands on our name and they need to calm down because we are not like our father who never questioned them about our share because we will question them and demand our share. Their tune has changed now since me and my brother have been in pakistan and we plan to go regularly and get our own house complete so we can also enjoy ourselves. Due to them not letting us go out with our kids this makes our children not wanting to go Pakistan because they say there's nothing to do except sit inside they try and make our lives so miserable that we ourselves don't want to go back to Pakistan. Allah Almighty Knows everyone's intentions nothing is hidden all that I can say is May Allah Almighty give them Hidayath Ameen.

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

Beautifully explained brother. I wish for more people to return and do what you and your brother have done. When we stand up against injustice, take back what belongs to us and enjoy the blessings Allah has granted, we restore the balance in society.

[@tandoorichef]

Assalam. The toxic family members are in every family guaranteed. From cousins to your own brothers and sisters majority of them won’t help you but will be the first to go with you for a day out. As long as you are paying. I believe in just doing your own thing and don’t tell them.

[@rashid218]

I don't know why people rely on family to do things for them go do it yourself that's how you learn I lived in pakistan over 1 year did every thing my self even built our own home with my brother only asked help some times when buying big things but 99% our self that's how you learn now I can do any thing my self

[@Hans-Zaman]

I have seen people are so helping in pakistan, they help you with free of cost

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

Yes, this is also true, MashaAllah

[@entityarif8404]

What I learned from my time in Pakistan is that unfortunately most people in Pakistan are unreliable and dishonest, both rich and poor. Most don't even pray regularly or fast during Ramadan. I have relatives who are not able to hold any job or do work because they can't get up before 2pm each day. There is a reason why the country is the way it is, but still I hope people turn to Islam and have integrity and become more productive, inshAllah.

[@bunchofcells]

yeah dawah here

[@justsain3236]

Instead of sleeping, if they attended some classes or did a course it would benefit them. Unfortuantely they are all cosied up in their "Kamble".

[@Rabbit36]

Yes bro, 100% agree and relate. Just take take take. My advice to you is if they are actually bad, don’t help them because they need you more than them. They don’t deserve it.

[@brothersman524]

I went to Pakistan once long time ago and nearly every relatives I knew are toxic and greedy, and only want your money - that is why I don't go there. And since UK is burning right now with the riots going on, I'm planning to move to Malaysia as soon as possible

[@britishkashmiri169]

Your nieces are so sweet and the older one is such a madam , she’s so mature and well spoken MashaAllah ❤🤲🏼

[@wolverinescratch]

Expect a lot more coming to Pakistan the UK has become scary and dangerous

[@deirdrenugent1887]

Your nieces are adorable.. but more importantly they are confident and so articulate..bless them x

[@tothertothes]

Allahumabarik may Allah continue to bless you all Ameen, excellent advice.

[@royalscribecomments1303]

MashaAllah! Nice vlog 😊 your nieces are so cute MashaAllah! 🤲🕋🇵🇰💐🌺❤

[@SomeoneUploaded]

*Mum was sending suitcase loads of medicine, clothes, u name it! Food aswell! And dad was throwing a fit! Anyway mum went back home and no ome even bothered to visit her! Again dad started throwing a fit! And was saying Aur Tuuwae vich var na! I told you stop sending stuff back home to relatives!!*

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

Have seen this happen many times. It seems that it's human nature to start feeling entitled to what we receive. So, the giver also needs to be mindful to not enable laziness and greed in their relatives.

[@justsain3236]

The more they talk over the phone, the more involved they get in others affairs and then you have to give.

[@KhanRaja-hu6hq]

Allah swt bless u and ur family top vlog again MashaAllah

[@khaliddin2212]

They don't do anything themselves, so they don't want you to do anything.

[@narinderchander]

They will only do things for you when you give them money above cost.

[@gmaverick2k533]

Mostly to do with property and land. They will try to make your life miserable so that you let go of inheritance

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

Yes, this as well.

[@gmaverick2k533]

@@MyBritishPakistaniLife Qabza party

[@majidmahmood4116]

Make sure the property is in your name

[@AM91722]

Great advice from the girls

[@ahsenshah2875]

Maha'Allah their smiles are infectious.

[@majidmahmood4116]

Simple thing is don’t help them distance your self from them you will have an easy life

[@AkramAliA50015]

Toxicity in Pakistan and rest of the Subcontinent is due to Culture and its Ungodly baggages. This will die down especially for the kids who are being born now and the ones who will put the foundation is the youth in their 20s because they are different from previous generations. The baby boomers, generation x will never ever make the change millennials and those a decade younger than millennials may contribute but not as effectively but Gen Z and younger will be the greatest contributor of all. Ins Shaa ALLAH the ones who can plant the seeds is the sensible locals if they understand, Overseas Pakistanis along with Muslims of other national if they have a deep understanding of what the future holds based on Quran and Sunnah regarding End Times. ALLAH Knows Best!

[@akbarca]

Milllenials are just as bad as baby boomers. Such a disappointing generation. My hope rests with Gen Z

[@ishhhdurrani]

@@akbarca each generation will become worse than the previous

[@SARWSiddiqui]

It's 2024. You can google how to do anything yourself. Then go and do it. No need to rely on relatives.

[@RajaCAthletic]

Do everything yourself and try to be independent, be good and respectful. However, don't let family or people take the mick. Keep away from toxic people, don't try to impress everyone and if they respect you, in turn show them respect. Personally, I never drove in Pakistan and had to rely on others, but I wanted my independence. So when the cars were unavailable I went out and hired a car for a month and drove everywhere, best thing I did.

[@maulanasaeedrashid-sheffie9990]

Slams The family members in Pakistan have genuine concerns Which come over decades of experience living in Pakistan So please be careful Jazzakallah

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

Yes of course, now I live here I also have some concerns. However, when I'm sharing concerns, I also share solutions rather than making a person feel they're at a constant dead-end. Like they'll never survive here, followed by comments like, just go back 😄 When people want you to succeed they give solutions and support you.

[@sbe8621]

i went to isloo for a week and a friend was fear mongery telling me dont go out you will be kidnapped, dont go there dont go here , in the end i went on my own and nothing happened the bs some of them say is annoying. Thanks for this brother. ps i do like your blue colour door you home has come a long way since i last saw it.

[@delightburberry7700]

What I don't like is esp in the South Asian community regardless of religion. When the Son get's Married the Daughter In Law lives with the Boy's Parent's. This is 1 Topic that is very toxic!

[@topg9552]

Everyone has these in pk & they feel entitled, they think they are clever. My unc messed me around for 3 days before I jumped in a taxi & got some essentials upon landing there I was aaaangry

[@safs2666]

Shawarma and chikhen burger are very good wages 😂. Thanks brother enjoyed this clip 😊

[@beastman.330]

They want you to have a bad experience so you don't stay .

[@labessss]

Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: A person's Du`as will continue to be answered so long as he does not pray for something sinful or for the breaking of family ties. (Narrated by Muslim)........ The breaking of family ties can also stop good deeds ascending on Thursday,likewise you will not pass Qantarah and will be made to rectify your affairs as Muslims, you cannot carry your issues past that point as past it is jannah wa Allah ta Alim..

[@whosthat2019]

You can't blame the people that live in pakistan you have to blame yourself because you make yourself seen as a soft touch. Stop send them money stop paying bills stop only riding with these people. Ride with new friends none family members if your going to get ripped off try not to make big investments until you get to know people and your still going to get ripped off 😊. Rely on Allaah alone.

[@erumalibhatti1218]

Grass is always greener on the other side...

[@afzalshaikhshahmahammad]

Probably best to go to an advocate and pay him to get a good honest deal on a cheap apartment in the City somewhere (or a Lux apartment if affordable). Simply live idependently from your family members and visit them on weekends - if they are receptive. Equally, invite them to visit you. Avoid this restrictive lifestyle, familial dominance and cultural nonsense whilst you progress forward in life! -- Look for solutions, never dwell on the problem.

[@shaminatabassam434]

MashaaAllah

[@mohammedqasim5221]

I am thinking of moving to Pakistan aswell but will need a way of income.will have to start from zero

[@waqasahmad8015]

Sadly you find toxic relatives and family are everywhere its always best to have your own space when you are in Pakistan we have had number of issues they scare you alot too this will happen that will happen

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

Absolutely 💯 ours went to the extent of asking me if anyone knocks on my door at night. When we were asked several times we asked why anyone would knock. Then we were told because you're from abroad, someone may burgle you. It was quite obvious they were getting someone to knock but alhamdulillah we never heard anything 😃 We were burgled though eventually, wonder who was behind that 😅🤔

[@AM91722]

The thing that puts me off moving back to the village (though it's one of the nicest places on earth) isn't snakey people, but the fact that I'd crap it having to deal with an actual snake in the house lol.

[@afzalshaikhshahmahammad]

Avoid your village and live peacefully in a nearby City! --- Think of solutions - don't dwell on problems!

[@britishkashmiri169]

Salaam son , I’m a single mother and am thinking of moving to Kashmir , I sadly didn’t inherit anything from my late father’s land so I don’t own anything. I do have huge family in kashmir but I’m not sure if they’d help me buy anything without taking advantage. How would I go about buying a small home and bit of land attached to it in Kashmir without getting ripped off. Luckily I am fluent literally and linguistically in Urdu so it does help reading documentation’s etc. Any signposting will be much appreciated. My son and I are going to be visiting in October to have a look around.

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

Walaikum Salaam, where in Kashmir? I would say to as much research as possible before you move. That way if you need to ask family for help, you're asking from a well informed place and less likely to be ripped off inshaAllah. We do have a WhatsApp group you can join. Send us an email if you'd like to join it. There's plenty of people on there that may be able to advise

[@farzanakhattak8050]

I have noticed from various sources that people become disabled because the family member who are settled outside in America Europe UK Middle East etc regularly send cash and then build huge mansion like homes and purchase luxury cars. The family all get accustomed to this luxury lifestyle and barley gain any qualification as they are too busy burning the relatives hard earned cash and showing off. I hope your family are protected and manage to settle.

[@imranb4985]

Moral of the story, you’re not a child, don’t rely on your family and take charge and do your own thing. All I’m hearing is child mentality to be honest.

[@uk2pakroadtrip]

❤🇵🇰

[@h62628]

Reminder to myself be self sufficient by the permission of Allah rely only upon Him

[@noreenanw]

Pakistan nandos choclate cake is soo nice n .. we usto buy the whole cake for likr 5000 rupes ! £13aprox .. u shud try it slice is less then 500 rupes

[@pabloescobar6714]

I have toxic member aswell but I gess I understand we cnt go out because we live in the main road meaning GT ROAD so cnt ride a bike cnt drive scooter or anything go with some1 if u going out have this n that dnt get anywhere alone it's annoying sometimes

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

Id say book a taxi for short visits or book a driver for the day. It's affordable.

[@pabloescobar6714]

@MyBritishPakistaniLife would you say book it off a app because the cousin will get involved and get there own people to take us then he aka the driver will be the spy and tell them everything we do and buy

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

Drop me an email I'll share my contacts with you.

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

Also if you're only visiting, it may be fine for family to know your whereabouts. Especially if you're living with them.

[@pabloescobar6714]

​@@MyBritishPakistaniLifeslaam iv just emailed u my email start with aka_haji786

[@HussainAshraf-zy6gx]

Asalamualaykum I would like to relocate to Pakistan, can you point me to a video that you have that’ll help please Jazakhallah khairan

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

@@HussainAshraf-zy6gx walaikumsalaam, what is it exactly you want to know? I'm just vlogging my journey from the UK to Pakistan as a whole.

[@HussainAshraf-zy6gx]

@@MyBritishPakistaniLife what you felt in the first few months, what challenges did you face that you probably didn’t expect and think we wont expect either, what should we prepare for as in situations about lifestyle like how the streets are, houses, electric and stuff, if we move what should we take to make the first few months comfortable so we’re just not hit with a bunch of problems and hardships

[@nasirtair1682]

Yes my bedren brother love peersabbb I’m in shef and the family watchin and we love it Yeahman big up n blesss up always…..on other news derby….riots I blame MCTURKS Nothing a free large donner with special sauce couldn't sortout… Imagine m8, they get of at the bus station and we hand out donners…. Talk to me.. 🤷🏽‍♂️… Filmed nation wide…… If they refuse slapem with a cheese nan and throw marcha in there eyes………with chilli mayo…. Spice up the riot…….. 100 of us march to MCTURKS make it look like a riot... Start blaming goreh on the way because MCTURKS ran out of donner …….. "We want our kebabs back "

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

@@r4nchx this guy knows me personally. You will never know the life I left behind in Derby. My advice is to never take Yorkshire banter to the Midlands.

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

@r4nchx in the UK, we have a mix of personalities. Having said that, I understand what he is saying. Others will not have a clue. Generally, in the UK, people don't move to different districts.

[@MuhammadShayaan-v9w]

Salam Please share your views on the riots that are happening against muslims in the UK in your next Vlog. Thanks.

[@suiteyousir]

How can I join these whatsapp telegram groups?

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

@@suiteyousir email us: [e-mail]

[@cleanmachinedetailing]

Salaam my brother, looking to move to pakistan, if I fly out in the next few weeks would you be open to meet for a coffee or some food in'sha'Allah?

[@MyBritishPakistaniLife]

@cleanmachinedetailing walaikumsalaam, yes, sure email me once you're here. [e-mail]

[@cleanmachinedetailing]

@MyBritishPakistaniLife okay in'sha'Allah... I'll get something booked in the next few weeks in'sha'Allah unfortunately I can't come any sooner as I run my own business and this is a busy period but would be amazing to come see you!

[@asifdutchmaster8705]

Controversial. Lol

[@ahmedsalem4043]

All most all memebers are toxic

[@nch6807]

Asalamo walaikom brother Farhan, What is your opinion on the current unrest in the UK with the ongoing riots? We have been planning our hijra for next year, but having young kids and the current insecurity we are thinking of bringing it forward InshaAllah. Please, do a video about this. I would like to hear thoughts. May Allah swt protect the Ummah. Ameen. Jzk brother.

[@AsimRashid78]

Just keep away from them and don't rely upon anyone unless you know they are absolutely trustworthy

[@JingLongTimeLing]

They do all thise things because they themslves are in that state and can not see you doing better. Ever had all these family rotian? The matlabi rotian dawats and invitations. They are never free there is always an agenda behind them.

[@adeelrahman]

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