Tumblr & The Medieval Beef

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#voiceover #latenighttumblr #tumblr

[@PMSeymour]

Bingus Biscord, Heres The Discord discord.gg/WKQ5PjunBf

[@PMSeymour]

Apologies If I sound extra tired in this one, had to double up on anxiety meds for personal reasons so its kicking my butt.

[@Sarah12471]

One sec, gotta transcribe it letter by letter and paste that into my discord

[@Sarah12471]

Cause i wanna keep up with this stuff

[@lucasknox4871]

0:47 That’s why he hates spiders; they don’t belong in an insect collection.

[@kingminceraft9487]

what

[@raquelking6323]

??

[@lucasknox4871]

@@kingminceraft9487 It’s a double reference: Spider-Man and The Amazing Digital Circus

[@axelprino]

Alternatively you can keep adding anachronisms and historical inaccuracies to that medieval story until they become impossible to not notice and eventually people will just assume you're doing it on purpose. Like if you have a medieval peasant coming back home after a hard day at work, putting on fluffy slippers, boiling water for a tea on a 19th century kettle, and seating on a modern couch to read a papyrus nobody is gonna bother pointing out the inaccuracies. Extra points if it's not a comedy and the story is played straight.

[@pallydan893]

That more or less happens in The Last Unicorn

[@darienb1127]

You can also do my favorite method of worldbuilding: The blender method. Take two or more time periods or aesthetics and blend them together until you get something so far removed from both of them that people will have to stop asking.

[@poppyfrancis7338]

Don't call me out

[@GloomyFish]

Teaboot not knowing who Pukicho is is weirdly surprising to me

[@stella4228]

I always find it absolutely hilarious

[@meatkirbo]

Almost nobody in this side of tumblr doesn’t know at least either Puki or Gaud. They’re just so popular

[@cjslime8847]

Who is the 2.0 of him though?

[@GloomyFish]

@@cjslime8847 Gaud probably

[@Merilirem]

To be fair, who is this cat girl?

[@J3Puffin]

A cow caught red-hoofed stealing hay, call that mid-evil beef

[@bloodstoneore4630]

That twist ending was one for the ages

[@dr4c0r3x5]

"I'm this!" F*cking killed me. In all seriousness who else is glad that their Tumblr hasn't been found by PM yet

[@Absbor]

1:59 and korean manwha pretends it's either english or german medieval time... with russian names.

[@peanutbutterandtelly3807]

medieval beef, isn't that what they called the minotaur?

[@lucasknox4871]

Nah, the minotaur is _Ancient Greek_ beef. A name that can also apply to the Trojan War, the Greek-Persian Wars, and the Peloponnesian War, now that I think about it.

[@sheersternfeld1914]

Medieval? He's not medieval, he's helenistic! You can tell by the fact that he is from Greek mythology, which is way earlier than the medieval ages.

[@countryboy1635]

No, it would be more like the cow monster in the Witcher 3

[@Eppon6]

If you wanna get closer to medieval times for some good beef I would suggest a catoblepas.

[@arifhossain9751]

Medieval beef isnt even beef, its a very fancy version of the modern turducken where they stuff live birds into a pastry and when you cut into it the birds just fly out.

[@submariNervous]

Fun fact: the reason they removed standard headphone jacks from most phones is because with right know-how it's possible to use them to create ACC copies of songs that are in other formats, thus making it possible to burn a CD with music you acquired digitally. Granted, it also means they can force you to shell out for bluetooth earbuds now as well, which companies will of course jump on, but the initial reason was the music thing.

[@camp002]

i also believe it was a lot of third party gadgets used the headphone jack to do there thing and since it used a headphone jack the companies didnt have pay or get permission for it

[@A-crying-mess-50]

2:48 I hate people

[@ImMushyMellow]

3:43 an important exception to this is if the masked figure is a human but acts so inhumane that it's wrong to call it a person. Like throughout the entire story you(and the characters)'re led to believe that it's a monster or beast of some kind and when its mask breaks and it's revealed that it's a human everyone is shocked because of how monstrous it acts. Bonus points if the masked figure is human while everyone else isn't but acts the least human out of all of them.

[@nyxorelius]

Can now only imagine Pukicho as the final image in the video

[@ribbonduckling1314]

L deserved so much more than anything light could give him. Happy pride to L only

[@MollyC-uh5pv]

That last one caught me off guard and hurt my soul

[@DragonsAreAwesome45]

1:57 Indeed! Specifically, the love for sweets and murder (since, you know, they hated each other's guts and were clearly aroace?)

[@wulfleyn6498]

Just got reminded of a Portuguese book that had all the news articles of this one religious newspaper from 1957 that i found and i suddenly need to use it for world bulding.

[@witherwolf3316]

Defrogatory has the right energy to it. I might start saying that for fun.

[@iris_drawssandwiches]

3:50 Nah the thing hiding their face is the creature. They're trying to get it off...

[@wyvernharries4788]

Ah the ipod. That thing got me though middle school high school and bits of college before i had to getva replacement. Good times.

[@lunestiacrescent827]

3:26 There really needs to be a stronger distinction between the words Brother and Lover here cause as is, it sounds pretty sus...

[@LOBricksAndSecrets]

I can't believe PMSeymour would post about the tiger with the gold tooth and then NOT show the Zootopia OC art it spawned

[@JustAnotherRandomYoutuber]

I'm kinda want to see that now. Would you happen to know where to look?

[@JustAnotherRandomYoutuber]

*I (Sorry, autocorrect)

[@Bellandora]

Introducing the new vigilante Cthulhu Man!

[@BasicallyBaconSandvichIV]

Crab.

[@BasicallyBaconSandvichIV]

Conspiracy?

[@wind64a39]

Eros problems are another option for the masked person.

[@Ethan13371]

When it comes to earbuds, you can get good wireless (Bluetooth) earbuds for like 16$ if you get VEATOOL T16 (not sponsored)

[@TinyDeskEngineer]

I am so incredibly annoyed with people listening to music without headphones in public

[@LegorocketsAnimation]

I occasionally consider carrying some spare Bluetooth headphones in my backpack just to give to those people.

[@phastinemoon]

4:03 - Durarara.

[@larsthedude1984]

As a medievalist and only-fantasy-thing-I-enjoy-is-Morrowind-and-DF I FEEL THE BEEF IN MY BONES

[@MynameisnotGraey]

4:00 How fucking DARE you diss Henry Stickmin

[@samwill7259]

I would feel much more confident asking a frog for a reference Look at him in his little business suit, he'd be a great boss

[@oversizedtrashpanda7514]

i wait for the day i end up in one of these videos

[@trollos]

0:14 *AMPHIBIAN TYPO*

[@kjrv7779]

That was an ending with a soap opera plot twist

[@rururiemn1941]

Surprise digicharat

[@lukaza1261]

hey, you should do a collab with Betina Levy. se said she's down if you are, and you have an overlapping audience that would love to see you both work together

[@yomifishery]

From the third to basically 20th century the Pope was a king with land and a military, but who also had spiritual authority in rival states and could and did punish them for personal slights, so the Scientology thing isn’t too much of a stretch, nyo.

[@meatkirbo]

Is it bad that i genuinely believed the medieval post was about present day America?

[@ranting2daMAX]

(1:56) L Death Note introduced me to autistic-coded characters tbh (I have autism). Don’t think I’m THAT type of autism, tho.. I may love sweets and sit weirdly but that could be because sweets are yummy and I am possibly bisexual. (Also I am a dumbass, so therefore am not that breed of Autism)

[@TinyFoxTom]

Who's Pukicho 2.0? Is it Gaud?

[@NeaPlaysRBLX]

❤❤❤wwww

[@tomby_]

I is early

[@TheLaughingBurger]

Pm always sounds like he just woke up, recorded the voice lines, and went back to bed.

[@esupton783]

I thought that's why it's late night tumblr

[@henrybear2293]

​@@esupton783I mean yeah: Stay up until late roaming Tumblr, gather up some funny posts and crash into the bed right after.

[@braverydoesstuff4063]

I mean… Yeah. That’s the dream

[@ninjabluefyre3815]

The life

[@thequagiestsire]

Literally me frfr

[@TheDanishGuyReviews]

2:52 Remember, the Vikings travelled far and wide, and brought people back for several reasons. So if there's a black person in a show set in Viking times, the Viking's horned helmets are more inaccurate than that person.

[@mastermenthe]

dumas, its about being innacurate to the *fanta sea*, no one emotionally invests about accurate to reality

[@Tatwinus]

The norse sold slaves, they didnt bring many of them back. And if they did bring one back it wasnt someone they bought. Almost all slaves in viking times were either norse, baltic or slavic with a hint of british. There was literally no sense in buying an extra mouth to feed on the way home when you could just grab one for free right before you crossed the baltic sea.

[@neoqwerty]

@@Tatwinus okay but what if their cooking is really fucking good is that a good reason to steal the cook and bring them back

[@Tatwinus]

@@neoqwerty no? You gotta realize that life in the north at that time wasnt exactly easy and a major contributing factor for the raids and the danelaw in particular was the scarcity of food. Wtf are you gonna do with a good cook if you dont have enough food to survive winter because of him. They literally put children out to die if they had any defects because it wasnt worth feeding them.

[@theirishviking9278]

Many vikings served as bodyguards to Byzantine nobels So many that a word was invented for the event of it happening... One i annoyingly cant remember the name of...

[@FirstLast-cg2nk]

This is why I'm trying to do a fantasy story that takes place in a bronze age. People are way too informed about medieval and will call it derivative and uninspired. When people complain about me putting Ziggurats (Mesopotamian, 3rd Millennium BC), Pyramids (Egyptian, as early as 4700 BCE), marble architecture (Greek, 570 BCE), and Legions (Roman, 107 BC) in the same time period, at least I'll be derivative in a way that is original.

[@atrane365]

Ain't no party like a Bronze Age party, because a Bronze Age party don't stop until the Sea Peoples mysteriously appear, absolutely waste multiple Mediterranean countries, cause the collapse of the Bronze Age, get defeated by the Egyptians, and then mysteriously vanish with very little historical literature to back their story up, and refuse to elaborate

[@kalef2]

Ashurbanipal (669-631 BCE): Yeah, we've been getting reports about so-called Sea People (1200-900 BCE) raiding our coasts and screwing our trading networks up. Would you know anything about that? The Aegeans: Whaaaat? No way. That's terrible. Can't say we know anything about it, though. Just been here fishing and herding sheep and stuff. Been real busy with this Troy siege (1300s or 1400s BCE). Haven't had time to go raiding any coasts. Welp, better get a mooove on. Things to do, stories to tell, gods to appease. You know how it goes.

[@rorythomas9469]

Do I have news for you regarding the 90s TV show Xena; Warrior Princess

[@FirstLast-cg2nk]

@@rorythomas9469 Which itself was a spin-off of a Hercules tv show. Yes, I'm fully aware. I'm old enough to have watched both.

[@Lunam_D._Roger]

​@@FirstLast-cg2nkFuck you mean old enough, I'm 25 and I've watched both. Xena Warrior-Princess is for all generations honestly

[@lazarusmekhane439]

Don't forget that the generic medieval setting also has no feudalism and seems to be an absolute monarchy, which is so absolute that the king cares so fondly for the small village the characters are from. The monarchs also being very much Roman with how it flips between absolute chad, benevolent rulers that have it all together and megalomaniac, insane dictators that make you wonder how the evil empire is even able to stand at all. Guilds act more like 20th century standard companies and not powerful, election-wielding bodies. Then the fact that nearly everyone is literate and decently educated and there is no mention of regular spats of plague or especially smallpox, making the medieval world be better vaccinated than the 21st century.

[@minhkhangtran6948]

TBF, if it weren’t for the Megalomaniac-World-Destroying-Threat-Of-The-Week, that would sound pretty interesting to live in actually

[@darthplagueis13]

That can go either way. Like, there's also the good old "A serf is basically the same thing as a slave, yes? Surely the lord can mistreat and butcher them as he sees fit and there's nothing they can do about it, right?". As for plague and disease: Really depends on the setting. There's a lot of centuries in the medieval where the plague was either not a big deal, or completely unknown yet. The smallpox were also not really that big of a deal yet. Like yeah, there were occasionally some nasty outbreaks, but nothing comparable to the Havoc wreaked by the biggest plague outbreaks. Plenty of medieval people went their entire life without ever experiencing major diseases outbreaks themselves or having them occur anywhere near them. So I wouldn't say that's necessarily an issue with historical accuracy. Plus, you often see it overdone to an absurd degree, with basically every second person you come across being inflicted with some kind of terrible condition.

[@selenagamya1612]

Throughout most of the Medieval periods, the majority of people were in fact literate, primarily in their bative language. Granted, books weren't typically available to the masses since everything had to be copied by hand prior to the invention of the printing press, but the average peasant could still absolutely read signs or write letters. Some form of written language has existed in nearly every culture throughout all of human history, and to claim that ANY civilized society could exist on a latge scale with even a slim majority being illiterate is ridiculous.

[@lazarusmekhane439]

@@selenagamya1612 I understand that people can indeed be literate enough to know what a sign is. I should have stated that they are perfectly fluent, and how everyone speaks as if they've all been to school and can easily read any book given to them. History is long and muddled, and my comment will not be perfect in what I want to convey and may exaggerate the point driven.

[@darienb1127]

​@@darthplagueis13Not to mention if your setting is high fantasy enough, people might have found potions and magic to fight disease.

[@samurexatlas7373]

0:48 It's not always about the trauma, Pomni. It's about the Mets, baby!

[@shinymainespoon]

Pomni Parker is canonically a Mets fan

[@CaptainObliviousV]

You’re telling me Pukicho is a cat girl and not some unhinged Pikachu?!

[@iamsushi1056]

One and the same

[@Blazieth]

Countpoint: Have the masked vigilante go out of the way to make it SEEM like he's secretly an eldritch horror abomination underneath, when in fact he is just a dude in a costume.

[@spamotron1178]

That’s just Batman.

[@Blazieth]

@@spamotron1178 ...You know what, fair point.

[@yammoto148]

@@Blazieth Well at least he isn't trying to be a comedian or else it would just be Deadpool

[@--CHARLIE--]

Literally just Ghostface

[@isaacljung4898]

scooby doo villain

[@galalini]

hello it’s me, the author of the post at 1:14 , I would like to take this time to expand on this. everyone uses “cute uwu nya” trope for catgirls but I am BEGGING someone to make a serious catgirl assassin who is absolutely terrifying because feline already make up a decent amount of “apex predators” so if you give them human intellect and posable thumbs you have a wildly good ambush predator

[@LegorocketsAnimation]

Isn't that just Black Panther?

[@galalini]

@@LegorocketsAnimation ….. I GUESS?!

[@darienb1127]

I'm actually doing something similar in my setting. The feline characters are mostly based off of jungle cats. There's a good mix of Kemonomimi and full Furry in this world as well. I'm just having trouble thinking of a name for said race.

[@Yvonne-Bella]

Hey P.M. Are you feeling better? I hope you're feeling better.

[@RunestoneFoxExtra]

0:11 shout out to my High School English teacher and Writing Club host who repeatedly continues to give me beautiful references; You're a real hero to me Mrs. Montgomery

[@LoveSylveon]

We should join the tiger as a Golden Tooth Gang!!

[@skippy-the-destroyer]

Gold tooth tiger gang, I'm in.

[@RoseKindred]

2:20 We just had that discussion in an Isekai group. It keeps coming back, like a resurrected Earthling and OP anime skills.

[@samurexatlas7373]

3:55 Ok, but what if they're human By choice. DIVINE COMEDY SAMAEL! This is my Christianity Headcanon, Angels have humanoid and "war" forms. Samael was being wary of any threats and caused Dante 20 psychic damage.

[@saltenzy449]

legit the end of headphone jacks in phones hurts my soul

[@alchemysaga3745]

2:53 The fact this managed to break PM so thoroughly is amazing.

[@kurotsuchiiwa3627]

its even funnier since the little cat loli at the end is not called pukicho but puchiko and even that is just a nickname. her real name is brockoly

[@ovni2295]

RE: The thing about masked characters. DnD character idea: -Character that wears full suit of plate armor armor that is kept meticulously maintained and polished to a gleam -carries a number of tools and weapons -Full helm that covers the face. You can't even see their eyes. -Never, ever takes the helmet off. Ever. It's like a religious conviction, they *refuse* to take it off around other people. They won't even eat with other people, they always scurry off to eat alone. So you have this character in the party, and the entire party is thinking "OK, they're playing the Mandalorian." But at a critical moment, when the chips are down and the party has no more cards to play, the helmet comes off, the snakes come out, and that's when everyone realizes it's not a Mandalorian. It's a Medusa. (Good Medusas are important.)

[@darthplagueis13]

I wanna be clear about something here: German protestant also means its not medieval. The Reformation was a 16th century thing. That's early modern. And then it caused people to beat the shit out of each other and throw another out of windows for 30 years in the 17th century. Medieval church arguments were a lot more funny, such as: "The French have infiltrated the catholic church so hard that they decided to move the seat of the pope to Avignon, France so they could have a puppet pope under the control of the French King. After one pope went back to Rome to sort out some issues in Italy and died there, the Romans threatened the cardinals present into picking a Roman pope as his successor (they actually didn't, they picked a Napolitan, but the Cardinals managed to get away before anyone noticed that having an Italian name doesn't immediately make you Roman). That new pope then ended up expanding the college of cardinals to get rid of the overwhelming French majority. This in turn made the French so pissed that they declared that new pope to be incompetent and elected another French pope over in Avignon, leading to a major schism between the western European backed papal tradition in Avignon, the eastern European back papal tradition in Rome and the good old Holy Roman Empire which was too big and scattered to collectively decide on just one side. There was then an attempt to resolve the schism by deposing both current popes and electing a new one, but since that new one didn't get recognized by the competing sides, there now were three competing popes. They only managed to sort that out in the Council of Constance where they deposed all three popes and agreed on a new one, marking 1417 as a year that had 4 different popes, three of them at the same time. Whilst they were at it, they also burned the Bohemian church reformer Jan Hus for heresy, resulting in the start of the Hussite Wars."

[@unknown_demi6902]

3:44 counterargument: three raccoons in a trench coat trying to sneak into a bar

[@daringdoombringer4014]

y e s

[@HazeEmry]

3:32 ermmm ackshually, Daisy is the chad Luigi's girl. Mario's is Peach. Don't take high energy girl from the courageous pissbaby, Mario please, we've been through this

[@TyphinHoofbun]

"People like his brother and lover", but neither Luigi nor Peach are in this photo. As the text implies, this is not the only fight he's been through. He's not stealing Daisy, he's just reminded of all the times he's fought everyone he cares about, and seen them tear each other apart as well. Countless matches, innumerable knockouts... And for what? What was even the goal of all this bloodshed? Does anyone remember? Did anyone EVER know? Certainly not Mario.

[@asackboyplush6508]

Brother's lover*

[@Merilirem]

*Makes the girls gay*

[@jmoneyjoshkinion4576]

4:04 no! The eldritch horror is the never masked love interest, like Cthulu intended!

[@deadlydingus1138]

“I wear no mask.”

[@Merilirem]

@@deadlydingus1138 "But do you wear a rubber?"

[@L.et..motif..]

I’ve been playing piano trying to get the exact cadence exemplified in which pm speaks exemplified in musical form, and this specific episode really goes hard.

[@jamesblake5215]

0:47 It's not always about finding the exit, Pomni IT'S ABOUT THE METS BABY LOVE THE METS OK BABY LET'S GO GET A HOMERUN BABY LOVE THE METS LOVE THE METS LET'S GO METS!

[@happyhippoeaters4261]

What a terrible fate, to become a punkicho.

[@BasicallyBaconSandvichIV]

0:40 RETURN THE HOLE OR I WILL MAUL!!!!

[@BasicallyBaconSandvichIV]

3:53 Or secretly have TWO masked vigilantes who operate independently, but neither knows that there are two of them. One is secretly a horrifying eldritch bunoy-monster working for the evil god in the guise of a human, and the other is just some guy. Think of the possibilities! Actually if you've thought of some, I'd quite like to hear about them to be perfectly honest....

[@BasicallyBaconSandvichIV]

WAIT!!!! ARE YOU TELLING ME OUR PUKICHO IS JUST PUKICHO NUMBER 2?!?!??!!!!!?????

[@hokustronk64]

Or alternatively called Broccoli if you're playing the english release of Hyperdimension Neptunia Re;birth. : D

[@Riv_Falcon]

3:44 Have you heard of… “Spiders-Man”?

[@gutsmasterson2488]

I don’t know what to say! I know that these videos bring me emotions.

[@andistansbury4366]

Medievil beef? If it's that old you probably shouldn't eat it.

[@CelticFish0103]

0:30 TRUE. Admittedly i got my new phone before I realized it didn't have a headphone jack and I was honestly bummed because using the aux cord hole in my car is way easier and more convenient than a Bluetooth FM adapter 😩

[@biowbe4522]

3:48 imagine Diavolo but eldritch god. Jojo already has ghosts, lets TURN THAT THING UP TO 11.

[@BasicallyBaconSandvichIV]

2:45 Doesn't the medieval age start at the fifth century and in 1492? That the arbitrary times I was given in school (AKA: Medieval age started at the fall of the western Roman Empire, and ended when Columbus did something. So in essence the medieval age is just the time of the Eastern Roman Empire with a couple bonus years extra to pay homage.), so it's wrong.

[@kay_faraday]

"How's it feel knowing you'll never be as cool as this" Pretty alright, actually. It's a tiger.

[@hfar_in_the_sky]

2:48 In the context of the rest of the thread, this line made me laugh like a loon because it's so beyond true! Heaven forbid we have a black actor/character in our Medieval European setting because this likely already anachronistic mess of show/movie/series that was just sooo historically accurate before that! Think of the historic sanctity of our anachronism stew! XD

[@theclodofclods]

The beef

[@tallynnyntyg6008]

1:58 So... basically fantasy RPGs/Zelda generally?

[@pallydan893]

Zelda is a combo of Arthurian legend/Robbin Hood/Peter Pan sprinkled with an assortment of Japanese culture

[@tallynnyntyg6008]

Fair.

[@VitaEmerald324]

3:38 perfect inclusion

[@strikefreedomx2671]

3:43 that’s because the masked character in Gundam is always the freak ace rival of the protagonist at best or an equally freak hater of humanity at worst.

[@AbadonXXX]

The medieval beef needs some bardcore

[@clodolcmidnights837]

“BLANK TYPO” in big flaming letters is my favourite reoccurring tumbler gag

[@RichDXtreme247]

That Medieval post about the inaccuracy involving a black person: I AM ONLY REMINDED OF ASSASSIN’S CREED: SHADOWS OML. LMAO

[@rubikthegeek2138]

Now I'm wondering if PM is aware of DankPods.... I think they'd get a big kick out of him, if not.

[@shingshongshamalama]

Thanks for jumpscaring me with the existential terror of being reminded that Puchiko exists.

[@historiasdeinternet2585]

2:57 "ho, so you are okay if the castles are from the 17th century and the armor is for the 12th century but you put the limit at a toyota mercedes 2004?" same shit

[@skippy-the-destroyer]

Damn rule 34 got pukicho. Damnit they're cute.

[@alexanderchristopher4151]

but if Hecate is an eldritch horror she cant have ~~abdominals*

[@aliciakalhoon294]

It's a tiger, of course I'm not going to be as cool as it. Tigers are awesome

[@simsationsgold7177]

Last photo. Now all you need is a basket of flower pedals to spread and the oputunity to skip along the road with a grin while tossing such pedals.

[@moxstoleyoursocks2241]

3:43 I have an oc like this, and I made sure to do it right

[@Elderterra]

@ 1:37, has that person never heard of diamond?

[@Fellkun]

3:57 I have a patron called the disgraced fool who wear a long cloak covering his body and a fool's mask but underneath his robe is multiple different arms torsoz and legs from different races and under the mask is multiple different parts of face from different races,the reason is because he takes/transform parts of his followers into their instruments or scar their face to look liek their make up

[@daringdoombringer4014]

this. this is what it’s all about.

[@PeoplecallmeLucifer]

3:40 The real OG

[@BasicallyBaconSandvichIV]

1:24 And the catgirl's name is Herobrine.

[@CheeseyBreezey]

"Generically medieval" so... A Knights Tale?

[@brawlstar1748]

Screw you DoomBringer, let me have my Shrouded Vigil of the Eastern Roads be a lil guy, not everything has to be beyond comprehension

[@djk1288]

1:32 THEY'RE GRRRRRRRRILLS!