EMBARRASSING DATING STORIES IN FRANCE I Dating in France vs USA I French Culture Shocks

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

Ahhh dating stories! They can be the sweetest stories and the most cringeworthy one's as well. I bared some of my 4 most embarrassing French dating stories today in honor of Vday coming up! Hope you guys enjoy, but more importantly, cant wait to hear some of yours! 🤣😏

[@ybreton6593]

Madame , je vous invite à écouter la Chanteuse et compositrice : Jeanne Cherhal , la chanson s'intitule : quand on est très amoureux ! bonne journée à vous

[@MrMistalova]

tu es vraiment mignone, je t'adore 🙂!!

[@larysamoskal]

I had a weird dating story: I was talking to guy at work( client when I was working at the hair salon) I was still fresh of the boat ( I moved from Ukraine to America) and I felt some flirtation in his attitude and then he asked me out to go bowling. I was very excited got all dolled up for the date and when I met up with him at the bowling alley he was with few other friends including a girl. We all had a great time bowling then he asked us if we all want to go to his place for some drinks and I said yes ( still flirting pretty heavily). When we got to his place he got us all drinks and we continued to hang out there me, him , two other guys and this girl. I started chatting with her and asked where she lived and she said here. I was in shock, apparently this flirting was all in my head and he just invited me out with his friends and his girlfriend cause he thought I didn’t know to many people in states and he wanted to be friendly and introduce me to some friends, I instead interpreted it as a date. So embarrassing

[@annie3343]

I'm French and I when I started dating my American husband, an American friend asked me if he was exclusive (she already knew I was). I was so shocked by her question! To me, she was implying that my boyfriend was not faithful and it nearly ruined our friendship. After living 10 years in the US, her question makes perfect sense. But to be honest I'm still confused at how you can date different people at the same time. When you like a person you want to get to know them exclusively. And when you want to meet new people you don't have to date. You can hang out at a party or other event.

[@SofiaPenaDeleuze]

Hi! Spaniard that's lived in the US for some time here. I personally like to date multiple people at length until I decide I like someone enough that I want to be exclusive with them. Maybe I have not met "the one" yet, but I really enjoy getting to know multiple people at once. It has taught me a lot about what I want and don't want in a romatic relationship, and I've gotten to know wonderful people in my lifetime. This won't work for everyone but it's really been working for me.

[@juliamary1587]

I'm an American, and I agree. Our dating culture is so weird.

[@mrsloveydove4579]

Back then in the US “dates” were with different people unless you were “going steady” with someone. If you made someone feel or think you were going steady with them but were still dating others you were “two timing” them, which could ruin your reputation. In other words, you were supposed to let your date know if you were just trying to get to know them a bit or if you were persuing a serious relationship with them. Nowadays, people tend to always act like they’re serious even when they’re not. Which makes cheating and heartbreak more likely, unfortunately. Conclusion: If you’re not serious and dating multiple people, let your dates know beforehand.

[@jvines11]

@@mrsloveydove4579 I find things are so casual now that unless we have gone on at least three dates or it is implied/ said we are going steady then I assume we are just checking our options.

[@mgparis]

Same here - I had the following conversation with my coworker: Her - I'm dating this guy. Me - Oh, so he's your boyfriend!. Her - No, we're just dating. Me - But if you're dating, then he's your boyfriend? Her - No, we're just dating.... It took me ages to get it!

[@JesseSaintJesse]

OMG, that crawling under the table story was brutal - props to you for sharing!

[@amyspeers8012]

I went out on a date with my high school boyfriend, wearing my favorite long cotton dress. We drove to a local park and started making out in his VW van. After a little bit, we hear a knock and see a flashlight. A police officer was right outside telling us we had to move. He was chuckling as he walked away. I quickly threw on my dress and we went home. My older sister was awake when I got home. Our mom was in another room, asking me to come and see her. My sister quickly stopped me and said, “you better turn your dress right side out before you go and see Mom!” My dress was inside out and backwards!

[@christinelachance8012]

...Now, that’s a good story!

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

ohhh man, those good ole high school moments when you didn't have your own place yet and had to do everything on the "sly." I'm suer that police officer had a fun time telling his partner all abou this discovery that night :)

[@davidsmith3263]

Thanks for being so honest. Embarrassing moments are awful but we all make them. Laughing about them is so necessary. What a great video!

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

Laughter is the best way to move on from them! Though time totally helps too :)

[@SamFournier]

Haha, it’s so true! They don’t have the exclusive talk. My now French husband told me that they don’t do that here in France. They better be vocal with Americans because... we need that talk!

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

Your husband is completely right. No expectations for that "talk!"

[@ilhuicatlamatini]

I thought a French guy that I met here in US at a work thing but had went back home soon after (pre-pandemic over a year ago), was trying to start a long distance relationship with me. He’d text me for hours everyday, we talked a lot, he sent letters and amazing gifts, and even sang me songs. After a year of growing super close I was sure he felt same as I did, so I confessed I liked him...and he said we’re just friends! Wtf? Its one of the weirdest and most confusing experiences ever. I’m not familiar with France and the culture enough and only started studying some French recently (he even wanted me to learn French lol) but never did I think a guy would just think all this kind of flirting and sweet behavior is platonic! Dating/finding love is hard enough without adding international misunderstandings, so never again lol. Now with the pandemic, well I’m even more single for Valentine’s Day, ughhh lol.

[@j-loosenfout67]

@ Illuminata Ilhuicatlamatini Hello, I hate to speak badly about people, but yes ...he's nice. :) I don't know where you found this French, but apparently you came across the only exception that proves the rule ...It's really bad luck! :))) Friendly,

[@mrsloveydove4579]

Sounds like he was feeding off your romantic energy when he was lonely or needed an ego-booster. I doubt it’s a “French” thing. It’s more of a narcissistic thing.

[@Layla-mt8fo]

It reminds me about a French guy I known,he always talk about something ambiguous,like be good girl for him,like he miss me,like I belong to him,but when I lost my account of social app and added him again,he even can’t remember me.but anyway,he is the most sweet and kind boy I’ve ever met.

[@georgiancrossroads]

The difference between 'like' and 'love' got me into bad trouble once.

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

ohhh man, i can imagineeeee hahahaha

[@matttanner387]

I am so sorry for the incident you accidentally had with your miniskirt. I was wondering how many miniskirts you currently own?😊

[@phillipsindel2291]

Kate - Love the clarity and frankness of your stories and observations.

[@jamiaawilson]

New Yorkers can relate to crawling under and leaping over two close tables. LOL

[@hipsterchic]

Had to laugh when you mentioned about crawling under the table 😂

[@Rachel-rs7jn]

Ha, I would totally crawl under the table. And bang my head coming up.

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

It's those things that you see in a movie and you think it never happens to me and then BIM. Real life hits you.

[@louise9675]

I love your videos! I am moving to Pairs in August and every time I watch your videos it makes me so excited! I love hearing about all your stories and little tips and tricks on how to blend in like a local when you go to France. I am also just wondering where is your sweater from? It's gorgeous! Big love for you and the wonderful content you create!

[@Ninarosemiel]

Loved your stories and you are not alone!

[@thelittlemoonpie8934]

That was so funny hahaha thanks for sharing it!

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

Glad you enjoyed! It was a fun one to make :)

[@eslteacherjillian2373]

OMG! The min skirt had me howling!

[@j-loosenfout67]

So funny the one with the mini skirt and the row of tables! :)))

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

flashing on the first date isn't my normal go to, but when in france...! ;)

[@j-loosenfout67]

@@UnintentionallyFrenchified It's well know, frogs turn into prince charming when one know how to kiss them well. :)

[@lovevelvetbones7507]

Cheers to the fact that I'm not the only one!! Love your videos🖤

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

Thanks !

[@dsubdu]

I haven’t seen that exclusive conversation nowhere but in US. 🤔

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

So i'm hearing! Seems like a very american thing apparently!

[@BeTreshique11]

Hi Kate! Great video! So if on your first story it wasn’t right to bise when you left him, does the story imply he expected a “morning” breath kiss goodbye, or could you have hugged him bye?

[@isabellem1945]

Hi, the way to manage this situation is to get out of bed, scuttle to the bathroon, dab some of the guy's toothpaste on your finger and use it as a toothbrush. Then you can go right back to kissing. ;-)

[@delphzouzou4520]

You can do a quick smack on the lips to say goodbye.

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

Yes, he was totally expecting like a smack on the lips. Which is was like ummmm.. yea right. We made out once, in the dark, not sober. Hahaha.

[@cocooletsgoo7901]

omg i have so many issues of dating in america as a french woman! this thing about not being exclusive on the very first date, i just cant get used to it 😂 i will met a french guy, it will avoid misunderstandings like that 😞

[@safiamerali5400]

It’s definitely a thing 😂 I wish it wasn’t, but unfortunately you are almost seen as stupid if you like someone and you don’t want to date anyone else

[@MA-zg2pz]

@@safiamerali5400 aw that’s not true of everyone in the US. Having grown up in the south east and living in the west coast, I didn’t date multiple guys at once. I would have been hurt if I saw someone I had been going on dates with suddenly with another girl. I think “the defining the relationship talk” early on clarifies this for both ppl. If you want to be exclusive from the start, just say so! And then it will be clear.

[@thepolitix1008]

Hahahaha thank you for sharing ! Funny topic :)

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

Thanks!!

[@beatas9316]

Love your blog! Spilling drinks is my middle name 😂

[@tube.brasil]

Funny that most people would say American hugs are much more intrusive and intimate than simple "air kisses".

[@susan8823]

Great video!! Sounds like me!!

[@quoniam426]

Seriously, your date could have either taken the bench seat to avoid you being jinxed behind the table or could have pulled the table out for you. It is not simping, it is just adapting to the situation. Those small restaurants and cafés make terrible first date places, especially with foreigners used to more interior space. I've pulled those tables countless times for friends, so why couldn't he have done the same for you? Jut ask him if you can go to the toilet or if you are both done and want to pay and go womewhere else. Pulling out the table isn't a priviledge due only to the waiters you know, especially when you are getting out of the restaurant since the customers dcide when they want to leave. Now that smoking is forbidden inside and only allowed outside, sitting on terrasses is a nightmare. Twenty years ago I was only going on terrasses because insides was packed with smoke and now it is the opposite. And in Summer, windows being opened, smoke goes everywhere. So now, outside pandemic periods, I only go inside even on a good day and not in Summertime. I hate smoke and everyone should. As for exclusivity, lovers ask eachother if the relationship is serious about some months or weeks after it sarted (tha means the same as being exclusive but it is assumed that once you are with someone you already are exclusive by default). On the other hand, you should precise on the spot if you are a libertine/polyamourous person in order to the other person know what your intentions are so if he/she doesn't like that, your lovey dovey relationship terminates right there, no hardfeeling, get on your life.

[@palupalu5647]

it's not unintentionally frenchified, but unintentionally Miss Catastrophe !!!

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

Hahah at least for these moments, for sure!

[@zaydalaoui9397]

It's funny, my wife had no problems making french girlfriends in France. I however struggled to make french friends, whatever the sex.

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

That's so nice to hear. It makes such a difference when you make friends right away! I'm surprised as a guy that you had a rougher time. I feel like it's "normally" easier for expat men than expat women. Hopefully things have changed now for you!

[@zaydalaoui9397]

@@UnintentionallyFrenchified I guess it's because I hate being drunk and it seems like the french usually bond when they're wasted (I hear it's worse in other european coutrnies :D)

[@katiecourreges]

hahaha my now husband counts our anniversary as the legit date we met for the first time

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

haha that's adorable. ;)

[@johnascialpi5247]

most guys are not good with details.. including myself

[@TheFrederic888]

I’m impressed. My wife is very serious about the wedding anniversary. I have set up an alarm that starts ringing 7 days before the date.

[@virginiav.1172]

I think American dating is frought with many unspoken and hard to figure out "rules" whereas dating in Europe in general seems much more relaxed and less formal.

[@MA-zg2pz]

That’s interesting. I find the European way to be more formal and with rules that I didn’t know about 🙈

[@johnascialpi5247]

I need to go to Europe, I think Id fit in better, the US has many ignorant people who only care about material wealth, I rather have intellectual discussions

[@mrsloveydove4579]

@@johnascialpi5247 Don’t count on finding people too different from what you described in Europe! Many Europeans used to want to come to the US because they thought the roads here were paved with gold. I knew a European woman that imigrated to the US and married an American because she thought all Americans were wealthy. Boy, was she disappointed. People aren’t that much different no matter where you go...

[@nocturnelleserene9890]

We don’t have the exclusive conversation in Australia- tbh I thought it was just an American thing.

[@SofiaPenaDeleuze]

What do you do about exclusivity then?

[@alfinou_13targaryen]

@@SofiaPenaDeleuze if it's like in France, if you kiss someone (or more!) and you see this person on a regular basis, you are boyfriend/ girlfriend

[@SofiaPenaDeleuze]

@@alfinou_13targaryen interesting! And you just assume that you’re exclusive with that person?

[@alfinou_13targaryen]

@@SofiaPenaDeleuze actually everyone assumes that. When you start going out with someone you're exclusive. It's very rare to see someone go on different dates with different people unless they're very very young or they're very clear about their intentions right from the start. If you're looking for a "sexfriend", you need to be transparent about it otherwise the person will assume you're boyfriend/ girlfriend. Of course some people are lying and cheating like in every country but the common rule is to assume that indeed.

[@SofiaPenaDeleuze]

@@alfinou_13targaryen that is good to know! Thank you for filling me in.

[@TheFrederic888]

-Honey, can we be exclusive? -Heinh?… Boum 😵!

[@emjizone]

7:52 Ouch! 😅 Oh yes... prolonged body contact, especially if repeated and in public over several days, definitely means a relationship serious enough to be treated with great consideration, and not just a "just in case until we see" game. You would never do that with multiple people at the same time, right? Right? …Would you?!!! 😵‍💫😱 Ouch… Unfortunately, cultural non-verbal language is not taught at school.

[@claraontheroad3049]

Ooh, as someone who's dated both in the US and in France and has American friends dating in France, I totally relate ! My American friends have definitely been tripped up by the exclusivity assumption haha... And on my side, I was pretty aware of how US dating worked when I lived there, so mostly I was confronted to how American people expected me to behave as a Frenchie... Like I guess they expected me to be super liberated and jumping in bed (and no judgement for women who do that, you do you), and it'sjust not me or most French women I know... Also realized that French and American men seemed to have different expectations in bed regarding some stuff?! I don't know if anyone else experienced that haha... But your accidental flashing story is the stuff of nightmares, that sounds so soul crushing!!!

[@annie3343]

Yes! We need a "cultural differences in bed" segment lol. Not sure @UnintentionallyFrenchified is up for that challenge...

[@abcxyz-cx4mr]

I don’t know if this is inappropriate for the comment section, it’s explicit so you are warned, but I heard how in the US it’s not common for the guy to ‘go down on a girl’ (aka blowjob or you get tho idea) whereas in many European it’s common and expected (I expect the guy to go down on me if I’ll do it to him).

[@claraontheroad3049]

@@abcxyz-cx4mr I'm not sure about that, but in my experience it seems that men in the US have a strong expectation of receiving oral, while men in France don't expect it and much less if they're not giving it as well

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

ahhh seeing it from the other side must be pretty insane too. The whole "super sensual" french women must have been soo annoying. We're so prude in the US that most countries are more sensual than americans :)

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

BAHAHAH! Honestly, not a bad idea. I think i'd enjoy doing that with a guest star. It's on my list once covid is in control and i can have guests ;)

[@emjizone]

12:00 What ?! 😯😂 Okay, it's a sequence for a movie. You know what… your mate should have moved the table himself. Damn… And if you had moved the table together, maybe you could have done much more together. Whatever, it's done.

[@lizzie1813]

Thank god for the covid, now that I live in France, I don't have to make "le bise". 🤣🤣

[@christinelachance8012]

...*LA bise ...

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

The funny thing is i actually miss la bise now!!!!

[@marsattaqueladelinquancest9727]

Le titre résume juste ma vie entière.. lol Je fais la bise 2 fois mais c'est pas partout en France. La bise, c'est pas '' dating ''. It's to say '' hello ''. All simply. Between friends or relatives.

[@emjizone]

2:43 French *do* hug! La bise is formal. A hug means solid feelings. 4:16 Yep. Lips can't always talk for arms and heart. The *downgrading of a relationship* from mouth to cheek is indeed alarming. Kissing games are also weird. Nevertheless, this guy lacked maturity in assuming the worst instead of accepting communication and explanations, especially with a stranger who may not know all the social codes in detail. Also, just *don't abuse alcool.* The fact that France produces a lot of wine and beer doesn't mean that drunkenness creates better relationships there. At some point, *you always prefer to be sure that it was you and not the alcohol that did it.*

[@engohar9475]

Bah oui ! Pour nous, s'embrasser, c'est s'engager. C'est automatique. Tu m'embrasses, t'es ma petite amie.

[@lindashelton4364]

Good grief, I shudder to think, what a guy would think if I gave him that dainty nugget necklace!

[@cmolodiets]

ouch! That was embarrassing

[@girlwithoutpearlearring]

Ouch... This makes me feel really uncomfortable. But thanks for sharing, I guess...

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

Your welcome!

[@Hannah_Rachel_and_Kotik]

At least they seated you away from her. Hope you told her the smoke bothered you and that's why you swatted...

[@thracianguy7166]

How many Maus books you got? It's weird

[@quelodequelo]

Dating culture doesn't exist in EU, if you have parallel interests you are a big red communist flag in our eyes In Italy we say:"azz manco abbiamo cominciato che tu la dai via come se non ci fosse un domani" Translated "sharing pizza slices is messy, unhygienic and I want my pizza fgs"

[@emjizone]

13:53 Not very french, but very Parisian. They lack space. Just go dating in the countryside, really. 14:33 Don't worry: there is a law against that now.

[@conneyortega8480]

Lmao I'm french and so I love ur videos but honestly I can't get why u re do attracted by this country it sucks especially for working . Well I can t wait to move to the US .

[@TheFrederic888]

I totally relate to that. I have left France 15 years ago. And I have this mixed feeling I miss my family, I miss some places and I am so glad I don’t work here anymore. Management sucks everywhere but it is at his worst in France (and in French subsidiaries abroad).

[@doroFee]

Hey Kate! Your channel is interesting & funny. But am I wrong, but I hear a frog in the background? This sounds strange to me.

[@j-loosenfout67]

It's her husband. :))) I'm kinding of course cause I'm French too!

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

hahhahahahahaha

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

I don't have a frog actually, BUT I read a bunch a comments that there is a clicking sound in the background so i turned the auto focus off my videos and i'm hoping that will help. Maybe that is the frog you hear?!

[@doroFee]

Haha... the joke about the hubby made my day. I was on a walk with my son & had to laugh solo loud. (I also habe a „frog“ but I am called a „potatoe“) ... thanks Kate for answering and caring. Merci & bisous 😘

[@emjizone]

@UnintentionallyFrenchified 7:25 Saying on KZbin the price of a ring worn on the *heart* finger in France... really?! So USA! All about the money! 😂 *Beware of symbolism* , please.

[@dome9911]

En tous les cas , en ce moment , en France on n'est pas prêt de savourer une bonne bière en terrasse ! merci pour ces anecdotes , la femme qui fumait vers toi , n'était pas très polie , moi , je lui aurais demandé d'aller fumer ailleurs .

[@palupalu5647]

ouais, mais là c'était un flirt, alors risquer de passer pour une mégère à la première occasion devant ton prétendant...

[@delphzouzou4520]

Moi j'aurais carrément bougé de là. Tu peux pas discuter avec une personne quand tout le monde t'écoute. Insupportable. Autant aller s'asseoir dans un parc.

[@TheFrederic888]

One time I was next to a table of a couple who obviously were dating for the first time. C’était insupportable 😂

[@karbofoss]

What da heck is "bees"???

[@perthfanny3017]

Did you just invent a verb: to bise? 😂🤣👌 I really felt second hand embarrassment just listening to you 😌

[@Koshrocreations]

Bise = give a kiss to salute someone. We do that in West Europe, at least in Spain, France and Italy. Don't know about UK or Germany though.

[@perthfanny3017]

@@Koshrocreations yes I know! I just find funny the fact she makes it a verb ☺😅

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

hahaha i'm sure i dropped a "to bise" in a sentence here and there :)

[@marsattaqueladelinquancest9727]

Funny all those videos about my country as if we were aliens lol or as if one had to explain life to Americans. Maybe other foreigners .. have simpler ways to approach France or mention the little culture differences in France

[@BStrapper]

of course simon was right!!! don't blame it on him...blame it on you silly 22 year old...then! Next time please tell us other stories with simon... it is gonna be fun!

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

I know, totally my fault but at the time, i was like hmmmm. LOSER....

[@engohar9475]

Pour le banc c'était où ? Paris ? Le serveur était juste un con, car c'est pas dans notre nature d'enfoncer les gens qui ont un problème.

[@francoisperez4046]

You gorgeous ;)

[@lavinder11]

I don't have many embarrassing moments, mostly annoyances. First, those stereotypes about French men being romantic (or whatever) are seriously outdated, especially Parisian men. 1. French people can be pretty direct when it comes to everyday likes and dislikes, but when it comes to romance, they prefer to read signals and innuendos, rather than speak their mind. 2. When they do speak their mind, it's an argument. Strangely, arguments are seen as showing "passion." I think it's dysfunctional and unnecessary, but I've come across a lot of French men and women who say they start arguments for the pleasure of doing it. 3. Be careful of the men claiming to be polyamorous. 4. Undignified and incessant sex-talk and if you don't participate, you're an (insert country or religion here) prude, although I think this is universal these days. 5. Be prepared to be comfortable with most of his female friends being ex-lovers. 6. Oh and they will expect to be friends with you after the relationship is over, even if they've cheated on you. 😒 Needless to say, I haven't had too many positive experiences with these dudes. Friends are cool, lovers... idk about that.

[@UnintentionallyFrenchified]

oh my.... Number 5 and number 6 are so true and was something that really took time to get used to!!

[@martinasandoval5326]

Ugh, I am feeling embarrassed for you, specially the mini skirt one.

[@olivierdelatouche9453]

You're story is 3 years old so i can assume that now you know, yes it was a weird move to crawl under the table but you managed it as a chef. If i were your husband i would make (nicely) fun of you everytime we're in a cafe or restaurant and you wear a mini skirt

[@proximstenvaag1072]

Remontada de la France: kzbin.info/www/bejne/iJ-2fJZ_i6msqpY

[@kikit9072]

You know what makes me cringe, your over-exaggerated movements and loud voice. I might watch more of your videos if you calm down. Sorry I'm just being honest and I'm not even French.

[@СергейМонин-д7с]

Oh my god. Your stories are terribly boring. Almost fell asleep while listening to this chit chat.