Unpacking the “Cult of Trauma” [CC]

[@ronjaj.addams-ramstedt1023]

Thank you for the warning about "The Body Keeps the Score." I have felt for over a decade that I "should" read it - now I can re-evaluate where that "should" comes from.

[@trystenteawithfriends8649]

I don't think that this video gives a good justification for why anyone should or should not read that book. My personal experience with The Body Keeps The Score helped to kickstart a resilience mindset that I really needed after a series of terrible experiences where I ended up in a post-traumatic limbo of whether to believe people are inherently or purposefully awful and worth saving or give up and / my self. I decided what society needs to survive itself is to incorporate a baseline of understanding of traumatic reactivity into every day expectations, which would hopefully develop into a culture of low reactivity, as mindfulness of the sources of reactivity I think would serve as a cushion against the assumptions of character that lead people to "split" on one another.

[@cheeki5280]

27:41 just want to thank you for saying this. Shout it from the rooftops that healing yourself and living well is still praxis!

[@stephm5722]

your point on ppl not allowing themselves/others to experience negative emotions & hardships if they aren't clinical was sooo good, i'll def be taking that with me :)

[@goblinelemental]

I have read The Body Keeps The Score and it helped me a ton. My childhood was extremely authoritarian and the book gave me a validating biological explanation, as at its heart a trauma is simply the result of several factors layered on top of our natural learning mechanisms--but more than that, it gave me a path forward via therapeutic treatment, which ultimately is about developing a new relationship with the body and emotions. It helped me understand I'm not broken or neurotic, and what happened to me wasn't fair or my fault. I've had to do a lot of growing and healing and every day is a challenge, though. There are reasons to critique the author (including as you pointed out, the lack of additional explanations in the memory sections about the history of false memory and the lack of care discussing SA, concern about stretching individual cases too far), but I'm still glad the book existed as a life-changing stepping stone for me. Ultimately I'd like to see us stop patholgizing human nature and start recognizing that capitalism's demands are a perfect storm of increasing the necessary amount of suffering we all endure daily, thanks to a lack of communal support and care networks, blaming individuals, and constant stress from countless angles. These things are contributing to a whole host of issues, not just trauma.

[@trystenteawithfriends8649]

Exactly this. I have the same conclusions from it.

[@stephenie44]

I think there is a lot of good stuff in The Body Keeps the Score, and I also think it’s overrated. It also paints EMDR to be this magic cure-all, and while it is a major break through, it can also be dangerous, and I wish that there was a less biased, more nuanced representation of that. A good game of tag can trigger flight. Wrestling or boxing can get a fight response going. But both instances are within the context of “safe” - because there are rules and norms that keep it in the fun/competitive zone (usually). That’s why play is so important for kids, it teaches them how to tolerate stress while feeling safe. So I don’t think the fight or flight responses in themselves are traumatic. Trauma is fight or flight or freeze in the absence of safety. As an autistic kid, who internalized stress, I dissociated a lot from my body or my surrounds. But I always felt safe - I was lonely, but I had kids I could hang out with even though we weren’t close, and I wasn’t bullied, I had great parents, my teachers liked me. So I existed in what I’ve come to understand as a safe freeze state. It gave me alexithymia and I’m prone to dissociation when I don’t know how to handle stress, but I did not develop PTSD. I don’t have triggers. There are no flashbacks. My partner grew up in an abusive home, and was bullied relentlessly by her classmates and school faculty. She spent her childhood in an unsafe fight, flight, or freeze state. She absolutely has cPTSD. When I get stressed out, I’m only stressed about what is currently happening. When she gets stressed out, she is usually triggered and retraumatized. Every past unsafe experience that was similar piles on to the current stressor. There is no way for her mind to keep now and before separate. So “small” events, like a bad exam, are more likely to be traumatic for her, where as for me they might just be massively disappointing. We’re in our 30s, and she still talks about getting a C on an essay she poured her heart into in high school.

[@sophieramati]

Thank you for mentioning long Covid. I have long Covid and I don’t feel safe anywhere anymore every aspect of life feels traumatizing.

[@makingnoises2327]

it made me frustrated hearing her describe doing covid-unsafe activities to "get better."

[@sohv1s]

I'm a bit late, last few months have been busy. Firstly, I knew Cody Fry was your type of music. Secondly, that feeling of nothing is going to work because I feel bad right now and I'm alone, hit me hard. I've had that recently because of my country's politics. But then when I meet my new friends, I remember that there are people who support the same things I do and maybe there is actually hope. Thirdly, I have been making new friends and meeting them in places I've never been to like bars, burlesk events and such. They haven't been 100% pleasant places to be but I haven't regretted going (even though I get migraines and health issues afterwards but I'm conscious of them and have rest afterwards). Trying to find balance between being locked in home and getting some flare ups for being active.

[@Valkyrie9000]

I think we're in this weird period where people are alive living as survivors of traumas that would've killed them or left them completely ostracized or institutionalized only a few generations ago. Advancements and social progress have vastly improved outcomes but that's created a new stigma where ideas of mental cure have overtaken realities of mental care as the normal, and that's clashing with the scale of both lack of access and rise of awareness. Like, my grandfather died of esophagal cancer, but nobody says colloquially "he died of life-long alcoholism and nicotine addiction", whereas that would be more likely the case were he born a millennial.

[@Valkyrie9000]

TL:DR people are mad that we are understanding the nature of human life better, and mad that it threatens certain egos and identities. Massive survivor bias. Nothing new.

[@Valkyrie9000]

The idea that hundreds of millions of people died early or unnecessarily and continue to because of lack of care and is an information hazard. It's a black hole. Easier to just blame individuals.

[@deirenne]

Stretch zone goal: Look for friends IRL, that I could meet up with. More specifically, so it's not overwhelmingly vague - trying to assemble a DnD group before the end of the semester, so then I can have friends I meet up with regularly IRL. I have friends and close ones, but most of them are in different cities, including my partner, that is in a different country, so we see each other only once a month on average. I also do have people IRL that I'm friendly with, I like most of my university group and we talk regularly, so I do have positive IRL human interactions daily, but we don't meet outside of the university and we don't see each other during breaks, so I need to get the best of both worlds and have some casual IRL friends that I meet socially, not just conditionally. Also, THANK YOU for that "Body keeps the score warning". I have had it on my "I really should read it" mental shelf for ages, because it's about mental health and I have PTSD, so surely, I *have to* read it, but after your summary and warning, I'd rather pass. Retraumatizing myself for the sake of reading a popular book that may not even be this scientifically factual, just because I feel pressured to read it doesn't sound like a deal worth making. There are so many good books in the world and my reading list is already massive, I don't need to push myself to do something probably harmful just to tick one popular book off the list.

[@lilybloome]

When I was in a residential mental heatlh program, 'the body keeps the score' was a huge thing; we had four or five copies floating around our hall and it was pretty consistently recommended by the staff. I own a copy, purchased by my mother with good intentions when I got back, but I haven't read it because I know it's going to take a lot of spoons so it's been sitting on my shelf for two years now. I've done EMDR, I've had additional things come up that feel like they need processing, but I also feel like my concept of trauma in spite of all this has been very confusing due to conflicting notions about it that all preach as truth. So this was really enlightening! Thank you for doing the research to parse some of the ideas out, it was super helpful in figuring out how I think about this topic myself.

[@josefinepoge2617]

This video was the most satisfying and stimulating thing that has been granted to my brain in a long time. Thank you Sydney! I love how you conceptualize things to the core, fckn awesome!

[@velvey]

as someone who's main interest is in trauma, this is a really good video! thank you for making it! i can't agree with everything you said, but this is clearly a well thought out video and you did your research :) trauma therapy and The Body Keeps the Score were both life changing for me. But I believe every person is different and different things will work for different people. love trauma, loved this video :)

[@BipolarCourage]

I am diagnosed PTSD & I still have impairment from it after years of therapy with a clinicial psychologist. "Trauma" is definitely a word that is misused & overused, by those who have "faux outrage" because they didn't like someone's opinion. I gave up reading The Body Keeps the Score, as the author insisted in detailing trauma in graphic detail (too triggering). Which negated anything useful in it.

[@siennaprice1351]

I have Septo Optic Dysplasia and complex PTSD. SOD caused me to be born totally blind, and it caused me to be on the autism spectrum, and it also caused a few other things. I had a stepmom who had real bad anger problems with everyone living in that house. I wasn’t allowed to touch and explore my surroundings, she always made me keep my hands to myself. I was shamed for running into things, and she even laughed if I sometimes ran into something. She was very confusing too. One minute, she tells me to stop being mad or to stop crying. Then the next, she’s mad at me for not truly communicating to her what was wrong. I got the treatment of, “why the f*ck don’t you just tell me what’s wrong already?! Talking about it will help you feel better.” She was even angry at my dad, angry at her kids, angry at the dogs. I developed CPTSD from the misstreatment from her. I won’t go into detail about anything else she did, because then my comment would be long and boring.

[@shapeofsoup]

Fantastic work, Sydney. Let’s see if I can oversimplify everything. Lol. The problem with trauma is presumption. The solution is empathy. Boom, I’m a genius. Ok, not really, but kinda.

[@Potato-qi3yz]

This video has been so validating, reassuring, and informative for me. Thank you so much for all of the time and research(and probably headaches) that went into creating this. V helpful :D

[@evanparsons123]

10/10 recommend. I really needed to hear this Sydney. Thank you

[@daniellematthews4758]

incredibly well said, and very thought provoking. Trying to learn about trauma in a way that is helpful to my personal healing is so, so difficult to do. I would love if you talked more on this topic in the future as well

[@cheeseburger2662]

I read it while i was still in early processing with ptsd and i remember thinking it was too focused on the political aspect of itself as a book to actually deliver any helpful ideas. But the basic stuff about trauma causing complex reactions was helpful for me because no one explained how that worked to me.

[@sarahleony]

34:15 this type of tailspin is where I usually end up and then I feel defeated and like we’ll just eff it all because truly nobody knows anything and nothing has meaning

[@xxBreakxxAwayxx3]

We love the little journeys too!!! It is a good time for sure!! (: ❤TY!!!

[@xxBreakxxAwayxx3]

jeeeez i cannot understate how amazing and insightful your content is!!!! TY for doing so much work and organizing and research to provide well rounded and nuanced and thoughtful!!!! You are brilliant and helpful as you are, but thank dog you love learning anyway(:

[@sarahleony]

Ooh I like “stretch zone”! That works for my brain

[@sarahleony]

46:01 and what’s the trick to recognizing and honoring that tipping point? Where it goes from respecting one’s limitations to “woe is me”

[@Zekrom569]

Well i had my doubts about "The Body Keeps the Score", although i hadnt read it, on one hand it is an argument that makes sense to the intuition of a person, that trauma "is stored in parts of the body", in my mind it feels oversimplification of a complex process and probably a misunderstanding that because trauma doesnt surface as a conscious thought means that it doesnt exist in the brain.

[@merbst]

I almost read that book! About your discussion of the woman who you chose not to name, I am the ethical opiniom that one should name and shame people whose behavior is not wise to emulate, for the benefit of those who could use such information to avoid the emulable.

[@nataliatheweirdo]

stretch zone, as in ive been thinking abt this since last year, have i done it? no! 😆 my brother lives a two hour train ride away and ive only ever visited him with family. i full on know what to do to get myself there, my brains just like ‘that is a no!’ but ive done a few scary things this year and besides full on absolutely crying abt it its been kinda fun! like, its weirdly liberating being able to walk somewhere by yourself- without anyone elses input xD

[@dio69666]

I only had to see the look on your face to know i agree with you. That book was just some dude bragging about how many freaks he's met. I could do that with my eyes closed, incomprehensibly better

[@austensg9596]

Update: went to the gaslighting video, it was the guy who founded the false memories foundation, Peter Freyd. Hey, I’m looking for the source that says the false memories concept was created by somebody trying to get away with @bus!ng his children, but it’s not showing up on the wiki for false memories. Which of your sources dives into that?

[@howdyitsren]

i had to skip over a lot of the body keeps the score. it wasn’t even my triggers but the way he writes about traumatized women feels…. icky. it’s neither self help nor academic. the book gives you the takeaway in the title, you don’t need to read it. there’s both better non-academic and academic texts on trauma. i’d rather read peer-reviewed research or self-authored first person narratives of trauma survivors.

[@dimimegesis]

damn Sydney, go off!

[@mariannatatarska1140]

damnit is it just my not native brain or do you actually speek so frickin fast i mean i can understand you, and i want to but i need to watch it in 0.75 speed cause you're fast af slow down honey please, it will be much more enjoyable to listen!

[@jess.singswithleaves6]

Some people speak faster or slower and that's just how they naturally process information. It's one thing to ask someone in person to slow down so you can understand, but we're able to watch at 0.75 speed so we should just use the tools we have instead of asking her to change the way she speaks naturally for our comfort.

[@han5vk]

Sydney's speech is indeed faster than most youtubers, so I only watch at 1.5x instead of 2x lol