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I don’t know how to write this. I want to be careful with my words.. and I’ll try to do that: “The Moon Is A Harsh Mistress” by Radka Toneff and Steve Dobrogosz is one of the most beautiful songs on the album Fairytales from 1982. This album is gold and a big part of my life.
But, that is not why I am releasing my “Quarantine Recording” cover of this song. It is a different and a more complex reason. I sang this song in 2016 in my good friend’s funeral. She died at the age of 19 and this song carries her with me the rest of my life. This recording is in her memory. And to honor her. To feel her. To give what I can, all tho it is way too little.
I will always remember the day, the faces, the tears, the pain, the love and I will always remember her. I don’t want this to be about me or carrying about me in this story. I want it to be about her. About the feeling of loosing people we love.
When I was recording this song in the studio I started crying in the instrumentalbreak because Fredrik played so beautifully. I thought about her. And I think you can hear in the last part of the recording that I disappeared a little. I needed to hold myself apart to not break apart crying. I needed to not think. And my focus was just to finish the song! I actually said to Fredrik right before we recorded: “I am quite scared to sing this one, I don’t know if I can do it..”. He gave me support and we made it together. When he played the middle part alone I could see in his eyes and motion that he was moved by the special feeling in the room. We did as good as we could that day to capture her.
I hope that one day, after singing this song for the hundred time, I’ll be able to sing it through with as much emotion and respect, but with my fullest focus. I respect Radka soo much. But this song will always be yours, Helle. This is for you. #rememberher #rememberthem #themoonsaharshmistress 💛