How We Stay Together After 10 Years And 3 Kids

[@Rayleneg1]

Wonderful job discussing the importance of prioritizing the marriage. Your children will see what a loving, intentional relationship is supposed to be like and willl know the standard. It is imperative for parents to have balance, time for their marriage, time for themselves so that their children will learn how to optimize the living experience. I also think it's wonderful Valeria that you read so often and are setting that example for the younger generations that follow you.

[@ValeriaLipovetsky]

thank you 💖

[@shivanirana5431]

@@ValeriaLipovetsky can you suggest a book that you think you need to understand your other half better or any male in your life😊

[@elism8862]

They see only the old p*rvert who did immoral things to young girl

[@elism8862]

Stop normalising such marriages! He is old!

[@roaayesh]

I LOVE that you guys said prioritizing the couple's relationship and love over the children is gonna help them long run by setting a good example for them to choose the right partner one day! How lovely ❤️ That touched me.

[@maddie19]

My parents prioritized their marriage when I was growing up and I’m so glad they did. I never felt abandon or like an after thought, as it was always clear that they would do anything for me. Seeing their healthy relationship has helped me so much now as an adult because I know what a good relationship should look like, I’m able to voice my needs and expectations in a relationship, and I’m able to cut out the people who aren’t right for me very quickly. What you guys are doing is the right thing and your boys will appreciate it when they’re older.

[@-KMA-]

Sounds amazing, so happy for you 😊

[@MissMercury12322]

❤️ Love your comment

[@gialapi2371]

She said she is board but he tries to control her questions. he is more then her dad , not husband.

[@joybarr8965]

I feel like many couples now focus on getting married not what it will be like to be married. It takes work, communication, compromise & being thoughtful & intentional. I randomly found your channel & I love this video. You both are so respectful to each other & kind. It’s beautiful to watch & listen.

[@nicoletterebelle6781]

I’m gonna go ahead and say you are the most mature and emotionally intelligent couple and parents I’ve seen. I’m far from marriage and parenthood but I find your insight inspiring. Keep speaking up against the norm please! 🙌🏼🙂

[@MK-iq1hn]

So much logic in Gary's way of thinking on literally every subject. It's just incredible

[@nicolaciccone2416]

Sorry but that photo of you and Gary when you were 20 looks seriously wrong you look 10

[@ffffoxana]

Is it just me or does Valeria come across as sad/burnt-out recently? I'm getting forced vibes from this - considering how disappointing the previous video in this series was (i.e. Valeria does all of the heavy lifting when it comes to parenting).

[@DominikaJankowski]

The maturity and respect that you both have in your relationship is so inspiring! Pleasure to watch you and your family 😚

[@elism8862]

He is old. Nothing inspiring

[@dube88]

How? Money. I mean bo judging here. It's a choice. Some girls love and need a n older man wuth money. Fine. But lets not make a podcast thay seems to be "the secret to stay together for long etc" when we all basically know what that is. We can respect their choice don't act like a TED talker on marriage when ife of common mortals is different.

[@laurelgeorge3766]

You know my dad when I was a little girl said I love your mom the very most and then after that I love my kids the very most…. I felt so safe when he told me that. I think I was six. It felt like having my dad prioritize my mom even when it was hard meant even when it was hard he would prioritize us over other less important things. And I’m 30 now and he always has❤️

[@tinakampouroglou4479]

We too prioritize our marriage... I think that showing our children how to love.. care.. respect our OTHER half.. Benefits our children to treat in time their OTHER half in the same manner.... Of course they know they are our NO. 1's...but mum and dad count too....Thanks for speaking out ALLOWED about this topic... 🙏HI from 🇬🇷

[@rashmiverma4597]

As much as I love watching you guys share your perspectives, the questions seems repetitive since the first few Q&As like age gap, parenting style, how you resolve conflicts. If the questions being asked aren’t diverse, may be y’all can make up your own :)

[@rochellevincentevonk]

My parents prioritized their relationship over us kids 100% it's the foundation. Created much stability! Also once we moved out of home my parents still knew who they are as a couple and are still happily together 55 years later...

[@LisaMarie-xu4si]

I absolutely love this video, please make more content like this😍 I loved it how clearly Gary explained everything🙏🏻

[@DB-jf4hy]

It seems that every time Gary corrects Valeria makes him seem very controlling. He shows love but kinda controlling.

[@smoky4236]

I thought this often in their videos in general Also, that he wanted to marry her just after 2 months seems - I don't know - weird. But their family is cute anyway

[@marusarozman4316]

I am glad I am not the only one noticing that

[@badgerlife9541]

This is often the case in any relationship with such a big age difference. Because one person has more life experience and seniority. But it doesn’t have to be negative or disrespectful if both partners find a balance of what they bring to the relationship.

[@asmita2318]

And he keeps on interrupting her too. And he explains her a lot. She seems kinda meek too. Idk. It just seemed like that to me.

[@Ivy285]

​@asmita2318 I noticed that too.

[@franci-uz]

lol valeria starts to behave like a kid when gary is with her - she starts to use a lot more words than needed, her body shows restlessness... what a strange dynamic! But I really love you both.

[@user-lc4sg3tv1k]

Donald and Melania Trump are married since 17 years, but they do not give interviews about it, although they are almost as famous😉. Girls - things always look a bit different behind the public curtain. So don't stress yourself by waiting for something exactly like this. Be your own idol and let go of any couple goal.

[@StefyRP]

And there you go a healthy couple speaking! Thank you. All makes so much sense, really appreciate all you just shared. Very centered mindset

[@hachithemaid]

me and my boyfriend don't have nor intend to have kids in the future, but the way you explained everything about the first question is exactly how i'd raise my children and mind my marriage if i did have kids. i just think it's the healthier for all parts and it is SO important not to loose yourselves and your relationship when you're parents...that's how you prevent your kids from becoming super dependent on you and also make sure that your relationship will be happy in the long run. i know it's not the same, at all, but we always try to make some space in our lives for dates, romance and relationship growth, even when we're super busy.

[@mdelgado9138]

He seems a bit condescending and controlling. Idk there’s something about him that concerns me

[@Nectarine333]

Same. His energy is very off putting to me

[@Arsip-b3k]

30:51 is priceless😂😂😂 I think only people from post-soviet countries can understand this "tfu-tfu-tfu"

[@aisharoy3499]

Well i am 21 and i am downloading this video for future. I don't have a lot of words to describe this except for 'profound'. This is the perfect blueprint to build on. Please do continue this series. I do fully intend to watch this video with whoever i do decide to make a family with. Thankyou so much for this gem. I really loved your advice about keeping it fresh in relationship by being whole and well rounded individuals who constantly work on themselves before just being defined by a relationship. Ps- i understand how he decided that he would propose to you within 10 days because he was actively looking for that but omg we need a story time about' how you met'

[@jackycollins9861]

This was more than relationships but also business and career growth - really appreciate it!

[@Itsmemayann_]

The fact that you’re drop dead gorgeous helps a lot😅 HE IS SO HONEST😅😊

[@zmrkljez]

You guys are amazing parents but what I want to know is how come all of your books are blue?? :D

[@ValeriaLipovetsky]

we're currently renting this house and it came furnished!

[@clairejohnson2051]

My parents had/have a really amazing relationship with each other and it gave me and my siblings such a good example for what to look for when we go out into the world. It also showed how important it is to love everyone around you, not just your children, but also your spouse and yourself. I never felt neglected or unloved, it enriched my life.

[@itsLaVitaRita]

I so loved that you both gave your honest thoughts and feelings. Very eloquently expressed. I am also in a good age-gap marriage and staying stronger for 15 years and counting. I feel that the key things to make the relationship work is respect, honesty, loyalty and trust. I also loved that you mentioned Nori (such an angel).. sometimes we need to face that we need help and resort from other people's expertise so we do not fail. As they always say prevention is better than cure. Gary is so smart for suggesting to get help as your marriage and family is your biggest investment. I can see why you fall for him. I love you guys and hope to meeting you both someday 😘

[@wjs5141]

He’s weird

[@saturn2024-f6p]

Why are all the books blue? Is distracting me so much! Doesn’t match everything up front

[@vasaravisockaite5176]

Sooo good! Love this new format. Thank you to both of you for sharing this very valuable part of your life. Greetings from Lithuania 💖

[@rosebud0391]

She said, "You don't get bored, you're boring and you bring that into your relationship" lol

[@mdanielleh]

I absolutely loved this conversation. I hope my future husband and I can instill a similar philosophy in our relationship.

[@refikabasarkan5842]

I understood once again why you got married to Gary 🥺 always be happy together☺️☺️

[@mariavel7858]

I love your relationship! so inspiring thanks for these videos🙌🏻❤️

[@elism8862]

He is old, she is young. That’s the “secret”. Nothing to talk about 🤣

[@hcap08]

You guys are literally the most imperfectly perfect love team ever ✨ cant wait for more videos like this 😍

[@divinemercyisforall6984]

why are people expecting children being prioritized over the relationship? if this is the case no wonder divorce rate is high

[@mawimawii7617]

I love how you husband care about you and yours child 💓💓💓

[@naturallove1213]

I feel little chemistry. This might be subjective. All the best!

[@beeeeeeep]

Married myself for 4 years going on 5 this november! we have a baby girl And I love influencers like you two whom I can relate raising children and looking up to. I know it’s life but was sadden to hear about Chriselle’s divorce you two were the two influencers I felt who exemplified and married life, work life, and raising kids can all be experienced together.

[@authentic_path]

I get a feeling that Gary is happy in the relationship, and Valeria is just OK with it.

[@marwafahiz8826]

Why?

[@authentic_path]

@@marwafahiz8826 Notice how He set up all the rules for their relationship. Of course he’s happy. He even said so. The ONLY rule Valeria made was to be able to do things alone sometimes (to get away from his controlling presence). And you can see it too. She looks drained and not happy at all.

[@authentic_path]

@@marwafahiz8826 also check the part where Valeria talks about romance. Gary seems surprised. And all she talks about is her personal time.

[@medeealeonte5354]

Do you honestly think she would make a public video about her relationship if she wasn’t happy? This is a prime example of two people who have different personalities and different needs in a relationship, and they have a system they’ve developed so that each one of them gets what they need from the relationship. Having different approaches doesn’t mean one person isn’t happy. You should maybe not make assumptions about someone’s relationship, especially on a video of them explaining their POVs 🤪 They’re literally telling us how it works. Less judgement, more listening.

[@sssssssssuv]

Yes. Valeria is the sweetest influencer I know. She deserves so much better. Garry seems domineering in every occasion, every sentence. He got the best. A beautiful, hard working woman. It's not like she was able to relax after marriage. He doesn't provide for the whole family. Usually older husbands provide and let their women be free. That's not the case. It is obvious that she's only in the marriage for the children.

[@milasucic5621]

Just love this q&a's i learn soo much from them, thank youuu💓

[@henniannariina5877]

Omg the kid saying immesiate Yes to wanting to go to an etiquette class soooo cute 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 On a more serious note, these two have such a beautiful relationship. It's interesting to me how serious they come off. In a lot of public relationships that we look up to, we are used to seeing a lot of chemistry and fun. Not saying these two don't have that, but they are more serious, at least on camera. I think it actually talks about the depth of their partnership, and that it's so much more than about JUST two people who have chemistry and can flirt and find attraction in each other. They're truly attracted to the PERSON each other is (rather than the surface).

[@bebitamira3054]

I agree in the idea that it’s okay to try and make the lives of our children better ( specially since we are foreigners wanting to have a better quality life for our children and for them to aspire to have more and not to have to live through the misery we did) But we have to realize they are just borrowed. The relationship is what’s gonna stay and if u want to still have a relationship with your spouse when the kids are done, you have to work on your relationship Today! Not when the kids are gone because by that time maybe love or whatever it’s gone. Balance is key.

[@menmyminime8063]

Gary is just awesome... I see why she loves him so much ❤

[@alokasiablackmagic3444]

That’s a stupid topic to me. You love and appreciate each other and it’s okay, not something extraordinary

[@kimmycasts2811]

I agree with the both of you as parents prioritizing your relationship even more coz Gary is right that that is the foundation of a solid family and that should be the long term goal.

[@vk_reads]

Such a wonderful and honest video once again! ❤️ Loving the video quality, the editing with the different angles (really helps you keep the attention for a long time) and the super crisp sound ✨ These Q&As with Gary are always a gem, always love seeing more of the two of you! 😍

[@-KMA-]

Nowadays families prioritize their kids over themselves and now the kids rule the roost and step all over the parents. Kids need to know their role and parents need to be the example and disciplinarians to teach them the important life skills and how to have healthier, happier relationships with partners and themselves.

[@mdelgado9138]

Why does Valeria look miserable? Hope everything is okay!

[@claudiakuhn4953]

Very important points, hubby and I have always made date nights a priority, the family starts with a strong marriage… ❤️❤️💕💞 20 years later still going strong…😊🥰

[@fatemebagheri1518]

I enjoyed every minute of this video!!! Thank you!!

[@donnacarson9460]

Gary, may I ask, what mic are you using? I like the sound and would like to purchase the same. Btw, great video and I'm very happy for you two!

[@CathlynYap]

I commented on that reel asking you to talk more about prioritising your relationship > child and I'm so glad you did and that I clicked on this video! Love the advice y'all gave, really inspiring and gave me a lot to reflect on, definitely sharing with my partner, thank you so much ❤

[@miriamgridl4457]

Thanks for sharing! Totally agree with a good fundament for the family! ❤

[@Wanderlust216]

I love this discussion. Yes, prioritizing the relationship is the foundation of building block of the future kids. Setting example for them, building relationships, taking care of each other.

[@helenebottger5699]

You know, when i first saw a video of you Valeria, i think it was from your moms wedding, i had a couple of pretty nasty prejudices. And i am so grateful that watching you, gary and your family has tought me so much. :))) About who i want to be (and who i dont want to be!!) and in a way that being a grownup isnt that scary and can actually be very exciting. XD I truly think you guys are amazing and i wish you the best in all the world. Thank you!

[@annaguillen1631]

Totally agree - you can't worship your children. They grow up and leave and you'll be left with a stranger- not your husband.

[@lalmuankimichhakchhuak5424]

What would you do if your partner is not invested in your kids the way you wanted to? Asking for myself?

[@paularubiovalero4229]

There is always room to learn! Thank you!

[@ЕленаВойцик-э7т]

Спасибо Вам огромное!!! Вы - большие молодцы!!! Желаю всех благ Вашей прекрасной семье!!!

[@seaks00]

He’s gross. Guess this is what happens when you’re a gold digger.

[@Rainy_Day12234]

Many parents smother their children, they need some independence too.

[@kimswisher4826]

Everyone should take notes. I love love all your answers you guys should write a book.

[@sunflower88639]

Gary and Valeria are wise people. God bless both of you.

[@faith1528]

It so true, the foundation is the relation. Happy parents, happy family . I wish I knew prior , what I know now. I was so focus on my children's, that I fogat about me and my relationship. I hope this video help future family . Thank you

[@sbh5079]

The fact that Gary took a gulp of water away from the mic because of Valeria 🤌🏻🤌🏻🤌🏻🤌🏻🤌🏻🤌🏻

[@sayit9496]

Those sleeves reminds me of Duchess Kate 40th birthday portrait..Newz u look dead gorgeous 😊

[@Flower-fr4wq]

i love this so much!!!!! i want more of this videos ♡ learning alot from you guys

[@masha26248]

The q&a videos with you and gary are priceless! ❤ it's so interesting to listen to such mature, always evolving and wise people! Thank you guys for sharing your experience!

[@jeanmi5045]

I just saw your short clip about putting your relationship first and I didn't think you were neglecting them but didn't understand what that means. This makes sense how you husband explains it. Is like when some one says, if you are in a malfunctioning plane you are supposed to put the oxygen on yourself first before the kids because you need to aid yourself first so you can help your kids and make sure they will okay.

[@MS-sv9mc]

Such a great conversation ❤️

[@dim9753]

YES!! I love the thought that the parents staying happily married is key because that is what started the family in the first place. It is so sad when the kids are the very thing that drives couples apart and precisely END the marriage and break up the family

[@susanadg96]

I need Gary to have a business channel/podcast haha great tips and perfect match

[@stephaniemcfarlane4434]

Could listen to both all day. So calming and nurturing

[@rosevivo9387]

God bless you🙏 love from Morocco ❤💋💕💕

[@natalia1045]

I am the same age as you, I have two kids, one we lost, my husband is also Gery and we are also 11 years together 😁 so I love to watch you just like my alter ego in another dimension haha. I too am working mama but I also do school and I still am with kids couple hours a day so it’s all about the balance yet I agree that prioritising your relationship is above the children. If relationship works then kids are in healthy environment and they behave better. What I can’t compare myself to you is your fashion I just admire from distance haha. Have a nice day!

[@nurefsandavulcu6460]

"I get bored with myself", same 😅

[@nellymiller7669]

You are absolutely right 👍 It's best for children to care for the marriage - they will be so happy if they see that you two are happy

[@eunicedith]

I love this ❤️ I want a Gary and Valeria type of relationship too

[@elenamariadalsanto4477]

Can I please have Gary examine all my future partners and assess wether they're good or trash? 😉I love your relationship and those kind of videos, you guys really seem happy with each other, thank you for sharing that with us!

[@hristinastojanova2452]

I am very young, and I am glad that content like this exists made from people I am comfortable considering wise. Great for building good atitude and perspective. Thanks❤️

[@parisaaaaaaty66]

Much love to you valeria💖 You too are best for each other💖

[@heatherglen8307]

You guys are the best. And have such nice voices to listen to hahaha more couples vids!

[@divinemercyisforall6984]

who prioritize children over the marital relationship? isn't that how it should be?

[@malekilani]

WOW guys, you're a true inspiration as a couple... Grateful to have you as an example when IRL I never saw such an energy between 2 people and knowing you come from parents that were not perfect gives me hope in myself as well. Thanks for these videos !

[@Dior-lover]

We are all the same and guilty is always there, as my family! We have 5 kids and 13 years of marriage together, we have up and down but most of all we love each other each day even more and we understand why we put our kids first! Understanding each other side, open mind, patient and so many thing we learning during marriage! We didn’t remember how many time we went out during the 10 years! You guys are doing awesome together as a parents with crazy busy schedules! 💕💕

[@keerahenderson1286]

Your relationship is so clear and mature and respectful and I admire it!!

[@noenueve]

I’d totally listen to your podcast if you had one.

[@mariesanchez]

You guys are so so cute!!!!

[@user-ei9js9ub4t]

Wouldn't mind listening to a podcast like this 😊

[@melisagalli3693]

Whats up with garys pronunciation?

[@marisap211]

I missed sit down videos of you and Gary!! Love you guys 🤍

[@vuigaworld]

Perfect couple ❤️

[@Slyoung-mm6vg]

Yes parents marriage first, then kids.

[@bilapsice]

I can't help myself but always prioritize my children.

[@drsamirujwal5810]

Your husband older than you...like daughter father

[@ShellyBomb]

Prioritizing children over a marriage is newer thinking, and, completely inaccurate! There is an old saying: "Children join YOUR life; you do not join THEIR life/lives!" 🥰