vlog | first day of uni, dealing with anxiety, lots of cooking

[@leahmegan]

hi friends ~ sorry this video is so long . I'm going to switch my filming schedule to try and make them shorter, which may let me upload twice a week at times ! I spend a lot of time just . thinking . looking back (even though it was only a few days ago), I do think my anxiety made me think to deeply about a lot of things and that none of this was really necessary .. I decided to leave it in anyway, in case someone relates ! I'm also editing a bit differently (and not really using text, since I talk so much and find the text unnecessary at this point) and will try some different styles and things over the next few videos (: I hope this video was still somewhat enjoyable, even though I'm always unsure of what people will think . anyway ! much love . see u next saturday ~

[@m_mmko]

i love the long vlogs tho!! 😭

[@aaomms7986]

I love long vid!!!!!!

[@chahinez6774]

I really love your long videooo 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️ plllsss keep going on long video

[@elisamunoz9770]

I love how unique your vlogs are, I hope you can keep making videos and taking care of yourself at the same time, I send you good energy

[@yomnaal5409]

You don't have to be sorry! we enjoy this and it's just this amount of realistic daily struggels and ups and downs make your videos are soo spcial❤️

[@poppycalliope]

You don't need to apologize for the long video I think we can all agree that we LOVE long vlogs from you 💕 also I completely understand the way you feel and to be honest I'm already 27, I studied and started working at hospitality cause that was my dream career but then I realized that it's actually not! I'm still trying to figure out what I'm doing and there are so many important things in life that can bring us joy and happiness. Jobs are very important but they are not everything. Sending you much love ❤️

[@carlablanco2893]

Hi Leah, I just listened to your reflection about your career and I kind of agree. I think we all have to learn that it's not important if our job is our passion, the reason we're alive, etc.. there are (and will be) so many things that bring us joy instead of our professional careers. We're young and we will make mistakes but hopefully, we will have our friends/family to support us so I guess we'll be alright

[@leahmegan]

I completely agree

[@aaliyahpatel2819]

5:33-10:30 resonated so so much with me leah! It's like you just jumped in my mind and talked about my thoughts! You're not alone- and always remember that you've built such a beautiful and supportive community on here too! Whatever you do as long as you are happy and comfortable and know you'll be amazing at it! Sending lots of love xxx p.s your videos are just the most comforting thing ever I wish I'd found them earlier- it would have helped me through some really difficult times

[@leahmegan]

thank you so much Aaliyah 🥹 reading all these comments has made me feel so much better, knowing we are all thinking the same things but often not sharing. I'm so happy I can share things and hear what everyone thinks, it's like having loads of friends (in the most not parasocial way possible lol). I will keep making videos, even after uni, and hope people decide to keep watching and share their thoughts

[@inesmdosantos]

i think none of us really know what to do in life, we just wander around trying to find something meaningful. 3 years ago i thought studying history was my dream and now i don't think it is anymore. i'm on my last semester as well, but i will be studying literature for my masters because i think it would make me happier. you don't have to be an expert in anything to do anything, i've taken lit courses and i am an avid reader, but despite that i'm no genius! if you think art would make you satisfied, go for it! lots of love

[@leahmegan]

thank you for sharing inês ~ I've realised that everything I've learnt so far hasn't been a waste, and has helped shape me as a person ! I'm glad I went to uni and hopefully I can figure out what to do with myself soon, but now I know that I want to work in something creative ! so it's a start

[@vickimcosta]

hey Leah! just wanted to share my story and say that i totally understand how you feel. i went to law school because I felt so pressured to become "someone important" (or what my parents/society made me believe was important), and halfway through it I realized I hated it so so much. so I got another degree and became an English teacher and it was something that made me happy for a while. i wasn't make a lot of money, and I was working insane hours, but still, I felt happy and fulfilled, I felt like I was doing something that mattered. until I got too tired and realized I'm still so young (I'm 25) and it's okay if I'm not ready to settle down and find the job I'll do for the rest of my life. it's okay if I'm not sure yet. so I'm taking two years "off" to travel abroad and work, study, travel and experience another culture. for a while I thought that people my age who were getting married, or getting really great jobs were "ahead" of me, but now I realized that I'm just taking a different path, and that's okay. after years of trying to meet other people's expectations, I'm finally ready to find what makes ME happy!

[@oriette5428]

Thank you so much for these videos!!! It really helps me to deal with my anxiety, because you’re so calm and peaceful 🤍 God bless you, dear Leah Megan

[@leahmegan]

thank you so much for watching ~~~ hope you have a lovely day

[@madmax9769]

As someone with depression and anxiety, I totally get it. Some days are incredibly tough. I discovered your channel a month ago and I could relate to everything you post so much.

[@leahmegan]

🤎🤎 thank you. wishing you the best

[@lyndseygormley9428]

You don't know what you don't know; sometimes it takes us doing something to realise it's not for us. This degree has transferable skills you can use should you choose to pivot careers; you have time. :) (ps. my undergrad is in Theatre and English Lit but I went back to school in my late 20s to pursue a career as a therapist ~ I would never have known this was what I wanted unless I have pursued other things that led me here).

[@leahmegan]

thank you for sharing Lyndsey!! your career path sounds interesting and definitely gives me hope that I can still explore new things ~ often I feel like the main thing I've learnt throughout this course is what I don't want to pursue .. but you're absolutely right that I've developed transferable skills (: thanks again !

[@cihannng1]

That sincerity within your videos what makes them dear to us!! Everyone's going through the same stuff, we are just not used to communicating this part of ourselves, an important part, and rather seem like we are "perfect" when we are not. And what is more hurtful is when we are going through these, we tend to compare ourselves to other people and think "am i overthinking this?" but we're not, it's just the people that we compare ourselves to did not show what goes behind their head when they're alone. Thank you for breaking that wall of cliché, my life is perfect and i'm having the best time of my life vlogs :) Take care

[@jenna-9722]

Leah please don’t make your videos any shorter i enjoy long vlogs because i like to eat while watching you and its like a treat to myself after a long day of studying

[@strawberry1067]

Today I was sitting in a coffee shop watching your video. I felt so good and calm, I didn't feel lonely because I watched your video. Thank you so much, Leah! I love you💗🥺

[@leahmegan]

thank you for watching ! 🥹⭐️🌷

[@jillan998]

8:00 that's exactly my thoughts and my life and what i really feel 🙃

[@rebelle5196]

dear leah, thank you for being there for me through your youtube videos even though we personally do not know each other! i am about to finish my master's program with a 4 GPA but i still have no idea about my future career… some days ago, i thought that i would be much happier if i were a café employee. and this thought breaks my heart because i chose my major with great willingness, i still have so much passion for it, and i worked too much to be successful. i truly hope i'm just overwhelmed and it will be okay in the future.

[@kaelatempest1260]

As someone who has to go to university soon and doesn't really know what to do, or feels pressure/judgement from others to pursue a certain thing, hearing what you had to say was really comforting and affirming, and you're feelings are super valid. I just know that everything will be ok for you, despite this feeling of uncertainty and the days when life feels super overwhelming. I love your videos and appreciate you so much. Congrats on being at the last stretch of uni, you're doing amazing!

[@lauryn5]

the 'unsure about the career and study choices' section resonated so much with me, about to graduate and I have been having the same thoughts. I sorta feel like it is all 'one specific thing' and the field I am majoring in has nothing creative or anything of personality going on, I have been contemplating starting a youtube channel or something of that sort as a creative outlet while I finish my internship to try and stay sane. have also found that it's usually never too late to make changes, the skills I am learning right now I might put to use in a different field, and I talked to some friends from uni and found out many have been going through the same thing, so I really appreciate the video!

[@livingwithskye]

i'm a sophomore in high school and your videos are currently getting me through studying, i came upon your videos and i've been watching them every time i sit down to study or when i need motivation so thank you

[@lerlerlrlr]

No! It’s definitely what I wanted to see when I clicked on your video! I was looking for thoughts and worries to feel like I am not alone and you helped me) Thank you for your tries, you really good❤

[@554658653805]

The last bit you said...that is exactly what life is. And it will continue! Re: the career path - it will also be full of stuff you haven't thought of yet. You'll be able to do lots of things with your degree that you never even dreamed of. Definitely not a waste of time. Keep going!

[@artmamashara]

Wow I love the talk it was deep. Girl u on to something, don’t sleep on your self

[@phoeberc9722]

hi Leah! also a third year graduating this year with no idea what I want to do haha! I also sit and reflect about the fact I chose my degree when I didn't even really know what I wanted either... and now the things I am interested in are not possible to study :( just wanted to say you're not alone in this and it's really nice to hear someone else feel the same because everyone I know on my course has some sort of idea on what they're going to do after we graduate... wishing you the best

[@chloooooooooooo]

Leah one thing i can say is it’s so positive you’re having these thoughts and considerations now, don’t let that be something that makes you feel foolish - you’re so young and you’ve got so much time and so many options and let that excite you! I am in the same boat as you now but at 24 after doing both a degree and masters that I’m just not interested in at all anymore, and working in a corporate field that similarly doesn’t fulfil me - but we are young and you should reflect that you’ve got this foundation of a great education and now the motivation to go after what you really want! You should be so proud of yourself for thinking so broadly and considering all angles for your future 🧡

[@elliejeong3753]

you dont need to be sorry bout the video being long, since i can manage my productivity while watching/ doing things on my own :) thank you for uploading a video this week as well

[@emiliaburgos5404]

I really like your mindset about your youtube not feeling like a TV channel, and appreciate it 🤍 and I think that if it's brands you like it's nice :) Thank you for sharing your videos with us 💙

[@tessamccormack594]

Leah, I'm currently completing a Masters as I felt I wasn't done with learning. To be completely honest, 50% of the choice was procrastinating because I didn't want the uncertainty of graduating. I'm still glad I've made this decision, but I definitely rushed into it because I felt out of control. In a way, I wish I had given myself some time to find my feet and see what I ACTUALLY want to do. Don't feel pressured into making a decision quickly. I think this feeling is a lot more common than we realise. No one likes talking about uncertainty, but it doesn't mean they're not feeling it as well. P.S your vlogs bring me so much joy, please keep doing what you're doing!!

[@lilia_casburn]

Your vlogs are so calming, honestly I needed to hear this because I’ve been struggling finding myself, and feel rather pressured about deciding my future when I’m still undecided what I enjoy. You should definitely consider group art classes, I started doing evening yoga classes to meet new people and it’s so refreshing to be around some kind faces 😊

[@icecoffeeforyou]

thank you very much for sharing your thoughts! I’m finishing school this year and get finals at the summer, which make me nervous a lot. you showed me that I’m not alone struggling with ordinary things every day! sometimes it feels like I’m the only person fighting with anxiety, but actually, it’s not true. thank you so much 🎀🪞

[@juliasowik4466]

Oh Leah, I so relate. All that you said... about feeling lost. mood changing. lack of purpose at uni. utter pressure to go forward instead of following passion. needing to find a job. oh my. i feel........ we all can support each other here.

[@yasminffs]

I live in Norway, and here higher education (uni) is free. I’m only in my second semester of studying law and I’ve decided to drop out. It probably sounds crazy to some. Even though I don’t have the guilt of wasting money, I definetly feel like I’ve wasted time and that I took a place from someone who would appreciate it more than me. I was never interested in law, my decision was spontaneous. However, I would be living a lie for myself and others and I find it illogical to spend three years doing something I don’t enjoy. Life goes on, things change. I’m starting a bachelor in history, something I’m passionate about. I trust you’ll end up in the right place when you pursue what you love. The ultimate goal is hapiness.

[@danielafernandamorales493]

It's so good to hear you talk about the topic of "you not wanting your channel to become like a TV show" kind of?... Because, lately, I find it hard to engage with other youtubers and their videos. They all look the same and there was a point where I felt I was watching a Netflix show (so to speak). And what I love about your videos is that I feel like I'm watching someone's journey through life and adulthood; with all the ups and downs. And I'm so happy for every milestone you are achieving I would tell you not to worry about how you look but I'd be lying because I'm very self conscious,tbh🙈 So I understand you. BUT, even with the messy hair you look lovely😊 Have a great week!!!

[@UlianaTatsakovych]

Hi, Leah! I just wanted to say that your videos make me feel very calm and less anxious (I feel anxious a lot these days). Since I discovered your channel, I've been receiving these peaceful, atmospheric and artsy vibes from you and that's been really good for my mental health. Thank you. I hope you eventually figure out what to do after graduation. And I sincerely hope you pursue something that you really enjoy

[@abigailelenas]

I relate to you so much leah!! I‘m in my second year of studying law and especially these last few months I realised that I don’t want to be a lawyer and live the traditional lawyer life. What really brings me happiness in life is art, photography and editing videos and films. Like you said, I really am not greedy at all when it comes to money, I just want to make enough to support myself. I love your videos so much, sending lots of love

[@zakiyawiltz]

A absolutely love how real and honest you are in this video and I love personally love long videos and I love how well put together your video is babes😻🫶🏽

[@savkoh]

hi megan! I recently discovered your channel and as a uni student, your vlogs really motivate me to work hard and enjoy the little things in life :-) your vlogs are also so comforting and relaxing to watch, don't ever feel like they are too long ~

[@leahmegan]

ah, thank you savannah 🥺🤎 it means a lot

[@Kingalily14]

Hi Leah, I love long videos and I really enjoy your videos, keep it up...Have fun on your last semester in College, have a great day🌺

[@amyamy1507]

Never apologise for long videos, they keep me company on a Saturday morning. And I totally relate to how you feel about the future, I have felt like that and mostly still do. Actually trying to motivate myself to apply to new jobs because my current one feels stagnant (amongst other things) but I avoid anything that will lead to change due to anxiety 🙃 Hope you’re having a good week!

[@دُعاءحسن-ل2و]

I really enjoy your videos these days the put me in a better mood actually sending you love and peace ♥️✨

[@leahmegan]

(: that makes me glad! thank you

[@y0ungditto]

totally agree with you and i agree so much with the part about being open with your emotions cause i think sometimes i identify a lot with you also with the uni thing, and you really inspire me to record my life and idk make some vlogging… i think the world would be more kind if people were more open too :/

[@leahmegan]

[@emiliabugueiromeyer8166]

I love your rambles so much, and OMG you sharing how you use to feel, I relate so much, and I´m not out of that yet, so hearing you say that it gets better, makes me so hopeful🤧❤

[@ingalazdina3785]

I'd die to have a friend like you! I love your personality so much!

[@leahmegan]

[@emiliabugueiromeyer8166]

The fact that you´re real is what makes your channel so great, and such a comfortable place for my tired little brain :) because we´re able to relate. Lots of love form Chile

[@ethanankrum]

So pretty! That first part with the close up and personal really showcases that-- love your videos Leah and your content is amazing. Lots of love from the US.

[@ethanankrum]

I will ALSO add that in-response to your discussion, you're not alone in that feeling. After a year in my first job after college, doing what my degree told me I was good at, I am leaving that job for something I loved doing when I was in college and not in class: working with students. Instead of being a law "person", I am shifting to be a mentor and tutor to other students in college/uni. And I couldn't feel anymore excited and happy than I do now (I start in 2 weeks). I will be leaving an environment that gave me stress daily. Do what you love, not what your degree says you're good at.

[@alia57832]

leah i love you soooooooooooo much you don’t understand 😔😔 ur my friend that i always go back to and makes me feel amazing no matter what. i just wish there was more people like you in the world. ur family and friends are so lucky to have you. you are such a beautiful person. i love you so much againn 😔💕💕💕 never stop posting

[@justnicole4030]

honestly your videos are such a blessing for me i am so glad i found your channel ✨️ i am also mentally in a weird place rn i'm studying something at uni which initially wasn't my number 1 choice (english and geography as teacher's subjects) because i always wanted to do something like art and on one side i always feel such a pity that i didn't start studying arts but on the other hand i'm kind of glad i didn't??? it's so hard to explain D: especially bc i'm already in my 4th semester and just randomly changing your study course would make everything more complicated. so yeah i'm kind of torn... i have way too many interests but i can't decide on what to do so i guess for now i'll just finish this study course :')

[@Squigsnwiggs]

I am with you on the having so many interests and not knowing which to pursue. I ended up graduating with one major and two minors. I would’ve done more if I had the time to. And now I’m pursuing one of my minor studies for a graduate degree! Life is so strange. I hope you can figure out how to choose 💗

[@yoselynfernandez542]

This happened to me years ago, I choose a career out of pressure and I ended up dropping out of Uni because I was not happy. I gotta say it took me a few years and tries to find my career but, now I’m enrolled in what I like and that’s ok. Life is different for everyone. Keep it strong I send you a bear hug 🧸

[@san3245]

Im not really a commenter but i really resonated with alot of things you said and it made me feel a bit less alone so thanks:) Also ive been dealing with wanting to express myself more with art because i really like it besides uni all the time. Ive just started crocheting and i really like it but i recommend just trying anything by yourself its really relaxing

[@yomnaal5409]

"Don't do what you think you should do, do what you want to do." This was very helpful to me and I really thank you for that! Well actually for me, I'm in my fourth year of pharmacy, same story as you, I just went to the thing that I had to, and now I'm totally not interested nor i care about it! But after everything I'v been through (depression, anxiety, and so many other things) I've just come to the same conclusion you said! It's not a life worth living to do something you don't enjoy and don't find yourself in! Because it is literally the journey, not the destination, and as I said "I'd rather fail at something than regret not doing it" So I decided just after graduating from uni to finally study another field and try to do something real for me! I hope for you to find the thing that you enjoy and to have the courage to do so! I love your vlogs and please don't ever feel sorry for providing us with these amazing realistic videos❤️❤️

[@zoepatricelli3947]

hii, i never really comment under videos but I just wanted to say that I absolutely adore your videos and my day gets instantly better when you post really long vlogs! I discovered your channel at 13k and you're at 30k now, congrats!! You're the one youtuber i could watch hours on end without getting bored and your videos are so calming, thank you so much for posting these vlogs

[@lazyydreamer]

Leah, just wanted to say I love your ramblings. :)

[@leahmegan]

thank you

[@fionaupton]

I really appreciate your honesty about what is/isn’t important to you💕

[@blossombassey3863]

goodluck on your last semester 💓💓 about the length of your videos we love the longevity

[@leahmegan]

:D thank you!

[@emiliaburgos5404]

Looove the long vlogs 💙

[@marianacordeiro928]

for me you don't need to shorten the videos, I really love long videos, vlogs that look like short movies are my favorite to watch. I really love your channel and your way of sharing everyday life 💛

[@niii-9864]

you're still doing your best and i think that matters the most 🫂

[@freeyaam]

I do love your videos! A agree with your thoughts! I am almost 25, I finished my university 2,5 years ago and I don’t work in my field. And that’s ok:) You will find what you love! You don’t need to apologize for the long video!

[@kylieyokoyama4124]

I found your channel just a few days ago but I’m already obsessed with you Leah!!! You’re incredibly beautiful !! Sending love from Japan ❤

[@leahmegan]

thank you so much !!!

[@nellekehendriksen5603]

i just wanted to reply to what you’re talking about in the start of this video because i think it’s so important that you share those thoughts. i’m 23 now, and studying something that is totally up my alley. which is great, but it took me a tough road to get there. i went on to study after highschool (the same thing i study now), because that’s what everyone was doing so i just went along because i didn’t really know what else to do. i quit after 6 months because i just couldn’t do it, which is okay! it took me a while but i’m back studying now and actually enjoying it. the pressure on young adults/young students is insane. i study social work now, and the more i study and see fault in the system we have in our country (i live in the netherlands) the more i realise that i want to make a difference for the generations after me. instead of figuring out who we ware and what we want, we learn that we need to figure out a job and preferably something that you have to study something really difficult for so that you’ll end up high in the society ranks. there is a shift happening in the mentality of the newer generations which to me, is super exciting. what makes it difficult is that the world we live in is mostly run by older generations who look at life in a different way. anyways, i feel like i’m ranting but i just wanted to say that i relate to what you’re telling us in your video, and that it’s okay to not have it all figured out yet. everything happens for a reason, so look at it with a brighter perspective. it’ll all figure out in the end!

[@aaralynrenee]

i love your longer videos, so don’t apologize!

[@azizayoqubjonova352]

Im in love with your videos... Your vlogs give me the feeling of peace 💗💗

[@mariereadsbookz]

i’m so happy that your channel grows!!! and thanks for sharing some of your personal thoughts on happiness and being a lost cause as that’s where i am now and your words gave me a little more hope that someday i’ll feel that as well :)

[@ReeceChambers99]

I think how you feel is very common and maybe it's just a sign that you're ready for something new... potentially something art-related. I'm not sure it's great advice but I think once uni is over for you, perhaps throw yourself into arty stuff - plan trips to art galleries, get loads of new art equipment, paint/draw/sketch loads - anything that gives you joy and peace. You could even film a video where you talk and sketch for 30 mins or something. I hope even with more subscribers the format of your content remains much the same. It's great to watch somebody so honest and down-to-earth. I can relate a tad to the anxiety (there are a few things, at 30, I still don't feel good doing by myself) and I do feel guilty sometimes roping friends in as a support method. Ah well, I'm sure it will improve over time.

[@pookiebear700]

10/10 blog as always! ❤❤ much love. Things will just get better. Don’t worry. It’s easy to look back and judge ourselves and feel like we ‘squandered stuff’ but that’s not true. You did the best that you could do in that situation.

[@thehiracode]

Leah, I completely relate to what you are saying. I focussed on sciences in high school and then spent the first two years of my undergrad in a rigorous pre-med program which I absolutely hated. I also went into science simply because I was good at it, but it was never something I loved. I am now applying to universities to study a field that interests me, and although it feels 'late', better late than never! I can't even express to you the weight lifted off of my shoulders when I decided to make the change. I hope you find whatever it is you are looking for, and that you are unafraid to take risks, as you mentioned. Best of luck with everything

[@fatimachoukeirr]

Hi Leah, I just wanted to let you know that watching your videos puts me in the calmest, most peaceful state ever. You bring me a lot of joy and comfort, I can definitely call you my favorite youtuber. Thank you for doing what you do❤

[@dilyyy657]

I love the way you capture nature in your vlogs 🫶🏼

[@游家瑜-c4l]

hey I am a college student just like u ,recently I have been stuck with anxiety of whether I should go for phd or work or doing something else after graduation but to be honest I don't value the things that I have been studying in for the past three years. There are so many thoughts in my mind and not going what to do which drives me in to a bad status of my mind ,after watching ur video I really can relate the anxiety and the things u have mentioned. it would definitely great if we got a chance to talk abut it. hope everything turns out well.

[@lera611]

You are very cool and strong. you will succeed i’m sure, you find peace of mind ❤

[@ГулназымРахымжан-ы4ъ]

I really love your videos🥹 thank you ❤️🫶🏻

[@angela359]

just wanted to appreciate the latest matching thumbnails 💌

[@333catgirl]

thank you for always being you ♡ ur videos are always a treat leah u truly make such comforting videos :)

[@gryffines]

I relate to every little thing you said... Sometime it just feels to much. Especially when you are in your final year, there is this pressure to have your future already plan out. It took me a few years to understand the only person building this pressure is me. Every now and then this thought come back though but I tell myself that I'm not alone and that if I am where I am now it is for a reason. We are not perfect humain being, we all needs to experience thing to understand ourself. I hope everything will go easily for this new semester !💓💫

[@nusaibaalmarri2971]

tbh i feel a kind of similar as i am in my 2nd year but my major is too abstract and mathematical ( its econ) and i find my self tending more to psychology and arts. i feel pressure from the world and my surrounding circle to keep pursuing what the market asks for in regards to job. but all i want is to have a cozy home, wake up early feeling calm and happy, read and write about what i like and paint until i sleep. Now, i decided i will just aim to finish my degree and then if i find a job i will try it out, if not then i will just go with the flow.

[@tami1468]

I'm completely with you on this one Leah! I'm in my 3rd year of uni and it genuinely feels like I'm the only one who chose to major in something I have no future in. And I have no idea what I'm going to do in my life, in terms of career and just everything... It's been really scary because it feels like everyone around me has their life together and I'm the only one who's so lost☹️ But thank you... You made me feel like I'm not alone. I'm so happy you exist🥺🥺❤️❤️❤️

[@ВикторияЮдина-м1щ]

I really understand your feelings. I'm studying at the university now, but I don't like it. I have chosen the subject because it was my favourite at school. Now I understand it's not the thing I want to study, but I have a year left so I stay here. Studying something you don't keen on is so hard and boring(

[@LydiaCaster]

I definitely related to what you said about university and following a path others have laid out for you. It's easy really, it requires little thinking, reflection & decision making. I realised when I was 18 that I soon would quit that part of my life I hated so much, having to go to school each day with only one friend in the building, waking up early, working for hours since the school was so hard etc., but I also realised I actually loved it because I didn't have to carve out a life for myself. University would be closer to that, but it would still be far away from actually doing a job, choosing where I'll live & work etc. I chose to study something I was good at and I liked (Linguistics & Literature in English and German) but it's becoming glaringly obvious that there's basically no jobs in that. Now I'm almost done with my master's and I might just go on to do a PhD, I'm good at academics and would get the best income I can possibly get with my degree. Yet, I would hate that outcome. I realise now is really the time to put an effort into thinking about what else I could possibly do that would actually make me happier, something that perhaps is less brainy than what was always expected of me. I hope you will find something to do with your problem, I see that money is a very stressful issue in the UK-education system. I'm sure you'll have thought of it already, but maybe you can check if you can study cheaply in another european country, there's some post-Brexit info here www.savethestudent.org/study-abroad/is-studying-abroad-a-cheaper-way-to-get-your-degree.html I love your videos and your honesty a lot. I think most of us also enjoy the length ! Greetings from Belgium !

[@asmrbyel]

i live for these long videos! you’re channel brings me so much calmness and i can’t thank you enough for that! you show the beautiful imperfections of life, which is a breath of fresh air in the constant struggle to be perfect! p.s. please take some sponsorships, you deserve to be more comfortable financially

[@leahmegan]

🥹💗💗💗 thank you so much!!

[@leonorr.3331]

It’s okay to feel lost sometimes and to not really know what we want our future to look like but I know that you and I and everyone else that feels that way is going to eventually find their right path. It’s going to be okay and you are definitely not alone because I also feel like that 🤍

[@milis2002]

Leah!!! i really love love love your long vlogs!!! you're so real and unique, you show the struggles that are present in our daily lives and that is so comforting to know that we are not alone

[@zarana83]

Hi Leah! Love your long videos, but I also don't mind if they are shorter and we get two a week! They are so beautiful. I relate with everything in this video, from the mascara in my eyelids to everything you reflect about career, jobs and happiness, thank you

[@gntlmonst0427]

6:40 so.. i couldnt lie to myself and end up left my college :) I decided to come back next year (so i cant feel guilty at all) and finish it not just for the sake of a piece of paper, but at least with some knowledge, when I have normal living conditions, when I will have a place to live and not feel anxious literally all the time, I will be able to raise my head in college and look at people, and sooo on I couldn't, because this topic is especially difficult for me (I'm also very principled and I hate lying), since I haven't been myself all my conscious life since I was 11 years old because of nice words my mother once said, so I didn't have any personality, so as soon as I had the opportunity to finally become normal (you can leave college yourself only at 18), I obviously took advantage of it but now I have one problem left, a job, I will quit in a week, and finally, for the first time in my life, I will have control over my life only now, right now, I realize how incredible this is.... if my comment is being read by someone who is just finishing school, never, believe me, never let someone send you to college/uni, if you don't have any life energy, you will be feeling shitty and also ull be shitty for these people who sent you there so if you are not ready, take as much time as you need, try this life, explore, and only then commit yourself to a couple, 3-4 years of this fucking, already short life and speeeaaak i wish somebody told me this 3 years ago when you started talking about it, I immediately wanted to cry

[@kamillavch]

this video is just what i needed to hear ❤

[@leahmegan]

[@isabelastwood1655]

i look forward to watching your videos every week! every time my college dining hall makes pesto pasta i think of you now :)

[@leahmegan]

aaa heheh thank you :D

[@xXAzureIrisXx]

If you think about it, it is way more likely for you to find or encounter things you don't like. Some things sound nice in theory, but shit in practice or vice versa. Sometimes life is just going through a laundry list of things until you finally find something that sparks something within you, and putting up with all the shit that allows you to have moments with those few things. If humanity hasn't been able to answer the meaning of life in the millennia its been around, its absurd to think that we can find our life's meaning/purpose within a couple of decades. I find it comforting that as long as I'm still alive, I can always make a change. Whether it be in my hobbies, career, relationships etc.

[@amisami789]

thank you for sharing your thoughts. it truly helps to see others having the same internal struggles & unsureness about the future 🙏

[@leahmegan]

of course ~ I do worry that I ramble a bit, but it is also a good way for me to just get everything out of my head at times. I know things will all be okay in the end, so I'm just trying my best to stay focused on the present and be happy

[@강강-d8s]

So happy to watch this loooong video❤ everything is gonna be okay😢 as you always said, keep going with some rest👌🏻 Love you from Korea🫶🏻🤍

[@earlyrabbit]

I love long videos because I want to know what you're tinking!!

[@leahmegan]

thank you

[@catsinmugs]

LOL as soon as you apologized for the fuzzy quality i was gonna say it’s literally one of my favorite things ever in people’s videos 😭

[@juliasowik4466]

You'd be the perfect film maker with this kind of eye for soul touching scenes

[@leahmegan]

🥺 thank you Julia! that would be a dream hehe

[@GG-wz7gw]

Hey Leah, I discovered your channel recently and I really enjoy your vlogs and listening to your thoughts. Excited to follow your journey. I wish you all the best! Sending love from Germany

[@leahmegan]

thank you so much!!

[@oanthatamoatlhodi875]

I can relate so much with you. I am currently going through the same thing.

[@kipperlauren.0521]

Long video!!! This is What I wanted!!!

[@juneannerubin]

Hi Leah! I know exactly how it feels like to be studying something that one isn't particularly interested in. I took up Laboratory Sciences in uni. But I've always loved the music and the arts. I excelled greatly in both of those fields. I was offered a college scholarship via classical/chorale singing to be in architecture or fine arts. It was a dream come true because I worked so hard to hone my skills in both fields for so many years. But my family was against it. They expressed that it wouldn't be a lucrative career and that I should become a doctor instead. I got my degree for pre-med 2018. I passed my board exam the same year but couldn't get a license for laboratory sciences yet as I was only 20 years old that time. And in my country, you needed to be 21 to get licensed. I helped our family start a business during my gap year after uni and I had learned so many skills which I never would have if I had followed any of the paths I previously took. It was very hard. But the skills I learned prepared me for bigger things in the future. I was able to have more time enhancing my skills in music and art as I was privileged enough to have flexible working days. And on top of that, I slowly started to learn about running a business and the challenges that come along with it, which is an important skill that branches many other skills. I believe that taking the opportunities that are presented to us in the moment will always lead us to where we really are supposed to be. Life will always have enough knowledge to give us along the way. It is never too late to pursue or learn anything. And everything that we have experienced in life, bad or good, will culminate to who we really need to be. We're blank canvases ready to be painted with endless possibilities.

[@miriana6299]

Thank you for your videos, they are really helping me through a difficult time 💞

[@hanna_o1018]

Hi,from Japan🧸 最近あなたの動画を知って毎日見てます。 I can't understand all what you speak but I'm looking forward to see your video. 仕事で疲れた日も動画を見ると癒されます〜 ありがとう🤍 I'm sorry for my poor English🥲

[@taysoo___]

loved this 🤍

[@manuellaaddo4268]

We love you 🥺❤️

[@amaraezeoke8312]

30k🎉🎉!!! Channel is growing so fast ❤

[@momo_koko]

I really enjoy the talk part：）It gives me somewhat a feeling of connection

[@leahmegan]

thank you 🤎

[@zammaviola]

Wow what an awesome vlog, I do relate so much with your words and honestly I would be so happy if you started advertising cause perhaps letting KZbin be your job would improve your life if you enjoy doing it and also you would be happier with your life choices ( perhaps ). Thanks for these amazing videos, they’re so comforting

[@салёнойтихийокеан]

love you so mush💔 your channel is the best find of this year

[@leahmegan]

thank you so much 🥺