Vlogtober Days 1-8: Finding Balance Between Celebrating the Season and Grieving

A special note about the introduction of this video: 988.
988lifeline.org/
The 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline is a leader in suicide prevention and mental health crisis care. It provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals in the United States. You can call, text, or message them online.
If you or someone you know is in crisis, please reach out. Either to 988, another mental health professional, a loved one, a friend. Those close to you would rather listen to you speak about your demons instead of never hearing your voice again. Trust me on this.
You. Are. Loved.
You. Matter.
This Vlogtober has been the epitome of a roller coaster. I argued with myself quite a bit over whether or not to do Vlogtober this year. But after speaking with my brother, I decided to do go forward with filming. Yes, October is spooky season, but Samhain is for celebrating the final harvest of the season and for honoring the dead. That truth is beyond clear this year.
I want to say that as of posting this, I am doing much better mentally and emotionally. I am grateful for the comments on my last video. I sincerely appreciate them all.
For anyone curious about the cocktail I was mixing in the video, it is a Vieux Carré. I used the recipe from Anders Erickson, one of my favorite bartenders on KZbin.
• How to Make a Vieux Ca...
/ @anderserickson
Socials
Instagram: / nyxnamor
Facebook: / nyxnamor
Threads: @NyxNamor
Website: www.nyxnamor.com
Camera: Canon G7X
Editing Software: Adobe Premiere Pro
Music: Epidemic Sound

[@evil_juggalo_1014]

I will and you take care and thank you and take care of yourself blessings and peace😊👍🖤💜✌️

[@allisondrummond951]

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ sending healing blessings to you and your family my condolences

[@lorrainebarnes8203]

🙏 Prayers for you all 🙏🇬🇧.

[@jlperry87]

I’m not a hugger and I wish I could give you a hug right now. Know you have an entire virtual community who’s there for you and your family during this time. Hugs from Boston 💚

[@grwilson58]

So sorry for You and especially your brothers loss, so sad that depression is many times such a hidden heavy burden on so many peoples lives that they suffer in solitude with and that so many unknowing people minimize it and make ignorant statements about it. Again our thoughts are with You and your brother, may your "brother in law" rest in peace free from the burden that weighed on him. ❤

[@elizabethmartinez4561]

My condolences... I'm so sorry for you and your family. This is the hardest thing to go through I know. I say take your time grieving and try to breathe. I send you and your family hugs and take care

[@terrizanow4524]

A loop is putting it mildly. Life goes a bit insane at times, job loss, loss of a family member, ouch. My heart hurts for you and your family with all the pain you've had dumped on you. I am listening to you talk watching you carve a pumpkin, you are rocking my soul. I am hearing your pain, hearing your brother's pain through you, but also hearing your moments of joy peeking they're way out, how your brother in law loved wine, how your brother in law had some strong beliefs and these things make your brother smile; because they make him smile, it makes you smile. Blessings to you and your family....sending out good vibes to you and yours as you walk through this weird, weird time. (Love that skeleton necklace, so cute!)--- Terri Z If you film your decorating, or if you don't just take care of yourself.

[@berthalandry4903]

Sorry for your loss prayers 🙏💜

[@tymichael98]

i'm so sorry for your loss😞 i wish you healing🖤 it's so sweet how much you are honoring your brother in law's last wishes. i hope it turned out exactly how you all hoped. as for the theme for your halloween decor, it sounds incredible! i thoroughly enjoyed wednesday and can't wait to see what you came up with🙂

[@bethmccracken8192]

❤sending love and compassion to you and your family, stay in your dance practice ❤ express your feelings through your energetic dance, even if you’re a line behind closed doors , embrace the process ❤your are loved and supported blessed be ❤

[@nicoledarling9646]

I am so sorry for what you and your family are going through. Hopefully my tackiness will give you a small smile, but I would say life/the gods are giving you a shit sandwich. So much devastation at once is very difficult to get through and I send my strength your way.

[@justinecosper3791]

I really enjoy watching all your videos! I am also grieving. First the loss of my mother's father at the end of July and now my father's mother a couple of weeks ago. Granted, they were both elderly, I was very close to both of them and I am very sad, so understand your grief. My heart goes out to you and your family and sending prayers and wishes for a happier end of year! We love you Nyx!!

[@jezabels7603]

So sorry for your loss Nyx. Its the hardest to be strong for family. Sending much love and we appreciate you doing this and sharing with us. Life is real. We are all here for each other.

[@juliemelton2398]

Dearest Nyx. Just read your last 2 posts. Saying I'm sorry and extending my dearest sympathies just doesn't cut it. BUT I am sorry , deeply and truly sorry for what your brother, you and your family are going through. To say I loved all that you said, expressed and shared seems kind of macabre, but I DID. Because you are raw and real is the reason I watch you and learn and tune into you. I actually gained a strength and comfort from your last 2 posts ( I've watched both over and over). My parents ( to whom I was close to ) both passed within the last couple years as well as 2 of my great friends........hardly time to grieve and yet another loss. With that said...... I've been suffering in silence with emotions due to " me trying to be strong, " having a lot of financial responsibility to get a hold on with my parents estate, as well as not wanting to be selfish and not be " upbeat in front of my husband . I realized after watching your videos that I've been quite spent and tired physically and emotionally as well and I need to get it out. I pray to the Gods for all of you. Never ever think you have to show us Happy perky Nyx. If all of us want that fakeness, we can watch so getting else. Take time for you and your brother and hubby. From what I learned in planning memorials and services....." One is good and focused going thru the times"......its often the afterwards that's the hard part when things slow down and " thinking" sets in. Let the waves come naturally. If Halloween decor doesn't get done....its unimportant in comparison to mental and physical health. May your dance tribute for your brother in law provide " you" healing. Throw yourself into your expression, love and realness in your choreography or improv. If it means you cry or express yourself to the utmost...it will only be that much more perfect . Thank you for sharing a subject so personal. It has touch many chords within my heart to allow myself to be me AND that ment for me to decorate . My hubby brought all my bins up from basement and said " cry and open yourself to imagination". It helped me We all love you and adore your strength . Be good to your dark heart. Your brother is lucky to have such an awesome lady in his life. You both will be ok Blessings and honor yourself ....and lastly. Happy Halloween

[@jennifermuscutt7277]

Sending healing love and light to you and your family. Unfortunately, we don’t have control of certain things in life. We just have to accept some things. I keep the serenity prayer close by for times like these.

[@SunshineDawn7]

I am so sorry for what you all have been going through 💔It just breaks my heart 💔Please give your brother an extra hug for me from West Virginia. Much love to you and your family and many Blessings to come ❤❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏🙏

[@CherryBerry48]

i am here for you in spirit to hug you and let you cry on my cyber shoulder, i wont say this gets any better, time heals all wounds, and i am so sorry for yours and brothers' loss, i just pray for your strength and bestow blessings to your heart

[@dianareyes5107]

So sorry for you loss. You are an amazing person and so strong, you did a great job supporting your familya and hanging in there. I send you a big hug.

[@juliemelton2398]

Oh and after all was read from your posts,,,,,,,,,,,,I'm also sorry about your husbands job situation. That is such a awfully hard thing for a couple to go through. Its hard to stay positive and strong through all situations and its not expected. I loved that while you spoke about " the job situation " you were cutting up a pumpkin! SO you!!! Sometimes awful things happen and we think " what is the common denominator? Did I have some influence in some way in allowing some bad energy to enter , thus causing or bringing this on. Of Course Not! After my energy work and intention setting, I believe this season is a start of another chapter of things. Its not easy to see that but I believe doors will open to healing, new possibilities and new energies that may not have been able to happen without change however awful it is I continue my prayers and thoughts .............. And if you have read any of this post ( I'm Apollo wordy, sorry) I thank you

[@LS-um3zq]

I'm so sorry for everything you've been hit with. Being the person that looks out for others is draining so it was good to see you taking care of yourself too. My condolences to your brother, I hope your husband finds a job he likes, I hope your burden is lifting a little more each day.

[@MorganNightshade3110]

So wonderful to see your smile with your friends, your laugh at the Halloween haunt! Good for you!!! Samhain is coming. Plan a dumb supper of favourite foods, express your love and how you all miss your departed. Share happy stories, laugh together, cry together. Speak to him, share the going on things in your life with him. The veil is thin at this time, Nyx. Bare your hearts. Laughter through tears is a blessing to be shared. Thank you for sharing your pain and your laughter. It blesses and enriches us all! Warm hugs and a big kiss from 2 more witches!!!! ❤

[@annedegn1015]

So sorry for your family’s loss

[@johnbishop2949]

So sorry for your loss kisses hugs and love to you 💋♥️

[@christinebarone7496]

Sending a hug across the world honey. May your brother find comfort and love with those in his family, such a difficult time. May you all be strong enough to get through this sad time.

[@krissalvatore4446]

💜💜💜💜

[@AuroraTigress]

🖤

[@VerminMassacre]

I wish I could hug both you & our brother. As always y’all have my love, support & know I grieve with you

[@AnnetteTheCrow]

My condolences hun ... So very sorry for you and most of all your brothers loss.. I couldn't even imagine what you are going through .. Sending healing energies to you and your brother ..