Watch This If You're On A Self Improvement Journey

[@emmaadams5905]

I'm a woman who works in construction. The amount of sexualization and demeaning comments I've encountered was so destabilizing to my sense of self. but when I took what people said and saw it says more about them than it ever says about me. staying in my lane, excelling at my job and keeping my side of the street clean that's all I can do. If someone who doesn't even know me wants to say some nasty shit about me I just remember what a journeyman said to me once "if they aren't financing you, feeding you, or f*cking you does their opinion even matter. And if they don't even know you and say shit then why would you care anymore than a crazy person coming up to you and saying nonsense on the street" I could be a victim or I can just be the best me I can be and people can take it or leave it

[@ahnc2612]

hi, thank you so much for sharing. this really helped me peal a couple specks in my eyes as I'm still trying to understand how to do better & be better. really appreciate 🙏 felt compelled to comment. thank you !!!

[@Jay_Alisha]

This !!I work at a shipyard been there 9 years it’s sad

[@tinywalnut6337]

Your journeyman is a good brother. I'm going to remember that line. Thank you.

[@Feminspire]

That's a powerful perspective. It's inspiring to hear how you've turned negativity into motivation. Keep up the amazing work! 💪

[@shruti2406]

I wish so bad, I can get this in my sister's heart, soul, mind and every cell of her body 😢❤

[@jnb-iv6zu]

This one really made something click. I have started to give up on myself trying to learn how to love myself through the internet. I see tips like "cook for yourself" "take yourself on a date" "drink more water" and i cant do that, it doesnt make me care about myself. My issue is i couldnt care les about myself. This one is fuckin real. Ive realized that i do treat myself like a victim. Even my most traumatic experiemce, being mute for my entire teenagehood, stemmed from a victim mindset. I dont need to see myself as unloveable and broken anymore. Its just that i dont know who i am without that label.

[@silvia_music]

Wow, thank you for sharing this and putting it into words. Eye opening.

[@machinedrum17]

Those last 2 sentences gave me chills. You also made something click for me as well. Thank you for sharing this comment!

[@GrapefruitCat2]

♡

[@josieg.design]

this level of honesty about yourself makes us all feel braver to share our vulnerabilities

[@keykay1495]

gorgeously put

[@silco.faustus]

I am turning 30 and it scares the shit out of me. Depressed, no money, no discipline. Your videos came to me at the right time ♡

[@charlottemorabito]

Your 30s are the best! It’s all about reinvention and getting to know yourself. You’re starting anew!

[@theGhostSteward]

Ok but, let's remember: Emotions are not toxic, anger exist for a reason and ignoring anger, envy and guilty dosen't make it go away. It's only by accepting it (TRULY ACCEPTING it) and exeperiencing them that they can go away. Awareness means being aware of the bad too. That's what enlightment (and meditation, which is the tool of enlightment) truly advocadet for. edit:There are no toxic emotions, just toxic ways to handle them.

[@mintsapling8306]

THIS!!!💯

[@damson9470]

could not have said it better. also always ask why you feel the way you do without judgement. to find out parts about yourself that need healing

[@Kaynighthood]

I really love the point about victim mentality. Its AMAZING how when you decide to do something, how it comes together. Dont think you can buy and maintain a car? Youll never get one. Decide to get your license and save up for one? Suddenly youre researching car models and learning about cars. An idea is only an idea until the very last stage, put some momentum in!

[@vrockchick89]

I've been depressed most of my life, I had a lot of bad things happen to me. When my grandfather passed away in 2014 it crippled me mentally. I dropped out of college, I stopped pursuing any self improvement. I had two kitties come into my life two months after that made life bearable. They gave me the courage to move across the country and since my love language is serving, I loved pursuing a better life for them. A better job, a better apartment, etc. Last month I had to put one of them down, my neighbor's dog attacked her and her muscles were ruptured beyond repair and the humane thing to do was put her down. I look back at the pictures when we were still 3 and it pains me so much knowing that I was still sad, depressed and I feel overwhelmed with guilt. Why did I feel anything other than happiness when she was beside me? Nothing changes a person like grief. I am ready to improve myself, to be happy and present and be the best version of myself for her brother who is still with me. I no longer want to be a victim, to blame my past. I want to push forward and change myself. I'm a new subscriber, please wish me luck on this new journey.

[@HeathaLynn13]

I am so sorry you lost one of your babies like that. I hope you and the other kitty can help heal together ❤️‍🩹🐈‍⬛

[@vrockchick89]

@@HeathaLynn13 thank you so much for your kind words. We are doing our best together. They both used to watch cat tv with birds but nowadays he is more interested in watching other cats on tv 💔

[@HeathaLynn13]

@@vrockchick89 love and hugs to you both xoxo

[@whatwhale5888]

I'm in the same boat. Went thru some hell that pretty much broke me, but now I'm finally coming out the otherside wanting to pick up the pieces and make something better

[@whatwhale5888]

You got this, won't be easy, but you'll get thru it if you choose to ❤❤

[@s_drbz]

'Today could be the day that changes the rest of your life' - so glad this video found me, this is immediately shooting up to my top 10 affirmations

[@sarahyoung9769]

I have spent 40+ years putting myself in a victim mentality. It has cost me so much in my life. Thank you for all your content, as it allows me to understand what I am doing to myself and that there is hope to change my future.

[@evelynwaldrop979]

i’m proud of you for making that realization!! that can be extremely hard to do & to accept. i wish you well on your healing journey 💞💞

[@FranklinClicksStuff]

I'm glad you found out now rather than more time passing you. Do you know what you would say to yourself if you could step back in time and give yourself this insight?

[@jillian7206]

This has got to be one of the best self help/self motivation videos I’ve ever seen. It’s not just someone giving a play by play of how they made it expecting you to somehow mimic that, but going in depth of the actual skills it took to make things happen. I also appreciate the bit about the victim mentality. It’s such a sad thing to see someone give up the second they see an obstacle instead of taking the time to problem solve around that obstacle, and most of that is a mentality to “poor me I don’t deserve this” instead of “damn that’s unfair, but here’s how I’m still gonna make it happen”

[@jordanabasham]

Seeing this has really opened my eyes. Finally actually getting out of the never ending loop of feeling like a failure (college dropout) even though I work seven days a week to keep afloat. Then drowning those feelings out with alcohol and weed every night. Then stopping for a little bit, feeling those feelings, and going right back. Feeling lonely, feeling like it’s too late for me. But none of that is true. Each person is on their own journey and for me, the pattern is officially ending!

[@JLM-y5g]

The funny thing is that none of the self-improvement content ever actually helped me. Want to know what did? I got furious. Angry. Absolutely pissed off. None of the self-improvement clicked with me because I wasn't really actively trying to better myself or my life, I was just watching it for the quick dopamine hits at 2 AM and the quick dopamine hits of going "It's time to get my life together!" I'd then proceed to pass out at 5-6 AM and wake up at 2 PM the next day, completely forgetting about it, or putting it off due to some inane excuse.

[@introusas]

For me it wasn’t until I finally stopped running from my trauma and allowed myself to feel the full weight of the pain, the betrayal, the heartbreak, all the lost time, and allowed myself to be ANGRY and DEVASTATED about it. I would spend entire days on the floor sobbing and screaming and pulling my hair, but each day I started to accept it for what it was a little bit more. I told myself “That’s right. I had so much stolen from me. So many years of my life that I’ll never get back. But I refuse to rob myself of the rest of my life.” If you don’t accept it and process it and heal from it then you will stay in that trauma forever, and it will stay in you. I’m far from where I want to be but I realize now that I have the power to turn things around. I do not have to fulfill this horrible fate that I’ve always thought was inevitable. I do not have to become like my abuser, and I do not have to spend the rest of my life miserable and unloved just because that’s the story that’s always been told about me, and in turn I told to myself. Our brains are incredibly powerful, and the first step is to change the way you think and talk about yourself and your life. Everything else falls into place from there. You just can’t get caught up in feeling like you’re going “too slow.” Healing takes a lot of time and patience. You don’t have to see your future perfectly to know you’re heading in the right direction. You just have to trust the process.

[@trishafur]

I swear every video of yours unlocks something new in my brain. Thank you for the work you’re doing and the impeccable timing this morning! 💖

[@charlottemorabito]

omg you're so incredibly sweet. Thank you so much 🥹 I'm so glad it resonates.

[@Kira-xs1zv]

As someone neurodivergent, with tons more issues both mental and emotional, I’m glad this video found me. Honestly there is this part of me that just tries to avoid these videos cuz I thought it just points out the bad in me, but that is the victim mindset (I hope it is, I’m trying to get that out of my head😅) and it felt like it just certified the idea that I am broken, a bad person etc etc. But no it just certified that, yeah I am broken and got things that shouldn’t be here, but it’s not impossible to fix it or change it! So get off that rotting ass and start to love yourself, life is too short to hate yourself to death!

[@k_d_dove]

I was literally only a few hours ago complaining that the systems around me are incompetent and was told that maybe, if everything around me is wrong to me, I'm the common denominator. And I vehemently denied that that was true, because why would I be the problem when everything around me is going wrong without me touching it? I think now I realize that it's not that I'm CAUSING the issues, but instead that I'm choosing to dwell on the bad things about them instead of the good things. And I'm the common denominator because I'm choosing to stay angry, stay upset, stay in this victim mentality. Instead of trying to be positive it almost feels like I'm craving negativity even when I'm on this journey to heal. Thank you for pointing this out to me in such a way that I can recognize this.

[@keiseegee]

as someone who is overly self aware and self critical (because i used to not be) this video was extremely validating, thank you for sharing

[@chey3145]

Girl 😢 my dad also died when I was 18, and I dropped out of school due to mental/emotional struggles. When you told that part of your story, I just burst out into tears bc I can relate to you. Not a lot of young people have had this experience. It is nice to know someone can relate. I hope you are doing well ❤

[@karazosha]

this video made me realize how much I've fallen into my old patterns of having a 'victim mindset' and focusing on the negatives. I've been wondering why I am filled with anxiety and did a 180 to how I was before certain circumstances. Thankyou for this video and for holding up the mirror I needed to look in

[@Brikeezy]

Love this! I’m a stripper and I’m documenting my progress of getting my 💩 together after my 20s were spent on two relationships that nearly cost me everything- including myself. I was struggling with this for a few months and I’m starting to find my grounding. KZbin is the only place I hear and receive any pep talk lol

[@elliotconaway7685]

It took me years to realize my behavior was wrong. I literally did so many horrible, rude things to people because i didnt know how to control and understand myself. This video is a lot of the things they tell you to do in therapy and at hospitals. ❤

[@T3rmHQ1213]

Wow... there is so much wisdom in your words. I want to grow and better myself, I feel like I have been stagnant for so long, I think this may help me on my journey. Its going to be hard for me, but I have to do this, I CAN do this! Thank you for making this video! Whoever reads this, know that you can do it too!

[@joobydoobydoo]

One thing I’ve started to do that really changed my experience with emotional regulation is kind of imagining my overthinking anxious self as a little shadow monster in my mind. I’ve always been very prone to overthinking and making catastrophic predictions and that used to dictate and ruin my life, by making me live in a constant state of fear and anxiety for the future, often bringing me to stay for long periods of time in an unnatural stillness (freeze response). But ever since I understood that I don’t actually have to give space or listen to that overthinking paranoid side of me, because, contrary to what I’ve always told myself, it’s NOT rational at all, it’s not "being cautious" or "getting prepared", it’s just scaring myself into inaction (I have to thank my therapist for this understanding), I’ve allowed myself to not listen to that voice anymore, an it changed my life COMPLETELY. Now every time I feel a self destructing paranoid thought bubbling up I recognize it as a weapon of self destruction made by the wounded part of myself to force me to live small, as the contrary of self love, so I picture it as a small little shadowy monster and instead of listening to it or try and rationalize it, I imagine to hug it super super hard and I keep focusing on the ideo of hugging it and holding it until it fades between my arms in silver dust and I feel like i can let it go and get back to my life. At the beginning it took a while (I had to excuse me to the bathroom to do this exercise when I was with other people) but now sometimes it only takes a couple of seconds and I’m able to let go ☺️ I’m sharing this just in case it’s an exercise that might change someone else’s life 🧡

[@claralobsiger]

I’ve been too focused on making the world better and wanting everything to be fine that I’ve never taken the time to realize that I was neglecting taking care of myself and healing from past wounds, which ended up pushing away so many things for me and people who truly loved me. I’m ashamed and embarrassed of who I was, not because I was that bad but because I thought I was so much better. It’s been a very humbling chapter of my life so far, full of grief, confusion, and reflection, and I hope I come out as something good, no expectations attached. I just want to be better.

[@Feminspire]

Your honesty is inspiring. It takes courage to admit mistakes and work towards healing. Remember, growth is never linear. You're on the right path. 🌱❤

[@damson9470]

i don't see it as high or low vibrations, i see it as each stage having its own worth. and if somebody's getting angry at traffic, they probably have some deeper wounds to heal regarding anger. it's pretty unempathetic to just tell that person not to get angry and tell them to just 'not get angry and be happy', he's in that stage for a reason.

[@damson9470]

+ each emotion has its own purpose. anger is a beautiful drive for motivation and passion to create change. nothing wrong with being angry (nor any other emotion), it actually helps us if we know why we're really feeling the emotion

[@ToshiSalvino]

Ive been at a place of having fully given up and rotting but these videos have kind of helped me start to get my head on straight.

[@MadisonWestfield]

I am so happy I found this channel. Your message is incredible. I’d love to hear more about pulling yourself out of negative head spaces and not relying on someone else to make you happy.

[@charlottemorabito]

Aw thank you! For pulling yourself out of a negative headspace, check out my video “How To B In Control Of Your Emotions”.

[@lulu_TheWitchBoy]

I only had 1 full year to experience high-school, fresh man was Covid, sophomore year was a weird year bc of Covid, and still have some full experience, my junior year was me missing classes because I was in treatment, and my senior year was just me doing online because going back to in person was really mentally hard for me. I didn’t think I was gonna graduate, but I did, but I didn’t give myself credit because I had help from my counselor, telling teachers to excuse me from some work because I was so mentally depressed, that seeing the school work made me so anxious I started avoiding it. Then after I graduated, I didn’t think I would ever go to college, because I missed so much of high school- I felt like I learned nothing, and that I was so behind, why would I embarrassed myself trying? But after being mental hospital, and therapy, having support from friends it helped me be more self aware, and just realized my emotion’s, alot more. I now came to realized that I GRADUATED , I didn’t cheese it, I actually had a disorder, and had to have extra help, and I still did the work, my teachers pass me, even though I missed tons of work because I still tried to do it, and I still summited some assignment, also message them why I haven’t been consistent. I now plan on going to college, to become a therapist. Even though it still scares me, I still wanna do it.

[@coolandepicjuno]

I dont leave comments very often but this video felt worth it. I wanted to say thank you for putting the time in to put these messages out into the world. This video helped me a lot and gave me reminders I needed to hear rn

[@charlottemorabito]

I appreciate that! Tysm 🫶🏻

[@nbcb96]

I’ve definitely been in a victim mindset and have been working since last week to pull myself out of the wallowing pit I’d fallen into. I’m also one of those people who having seen bad people use the term victim to criticise activists and victims of oppression fought against the term victim mindset. I’m glad you addressed how it’s different.

[@8evanesse]

I just subscribed. This was eye-opening, and came at a good time for me. You made me realize that I’ve been very much in a victim mindset, and I’m definitely not treating myself or talking to myself like someone who loves themselves. You’ve given me some things to ponder. Thank you.

[@kwtr.a]

this video is an amalgamation of every single self help video i’ve watched for the past 5 years. great job with this and I can’t wait to see more!!!

[@valiant_valor]

OMFG THANK YOU!! Ive been needing to hear this. I've been in a victim mindset for so long and ive kept myself in stagnation for so long because of it. I needed this reminder.

[@Sketchy-wr3bb]

I am , my root problem. Got to work on my self esteem and more.

[@ESB6-u3t]

Thank you. As someone who lost my mother at 17, and also somehow graduated college with an aerospace engineering degree, this resonated. Healing is also about letting go and stepping the fuck up and shedding the shell we were in.

[@sarajohnson6855]

I'm trying to reverse 17 years of ingnored PCOS. Being open to the idea of taking Medicine, making healthier food choices and proportion size, exercise choices. I have hang ups that I'm trying to let go that have happened to me in the past. It's still tempting to simply decay though.

[@marlenestrella211]

Thank you so much, from the heart. Maybe there is still hope for me.

[@oliviadelrosario7380]

I start my days w ur content to get me going, you manifested me!!!

[@charlottemorabito]

You're so sweet. I'm so glad the videos help! Let me know if you have any requests for topics you want me to add to my list of future videos ♥️

[@papaya331]

same

[@awkwardalbatros2101]

ur content eases my anxiety so much omg

[@calhih]

This is just something I really needed to hear. So so much. Thank you

[@faithlessthewondergirl]

i really really really love this video, can’t believe you don’t have more views. thank you.

[@byttercandy]

Just found your channel and it made me so happy! Thank you ❤

[@TheGoofygirl67]

I’ve just found your videos and I absolutely love them! They teach me exactly where I am and tell me just what I need to hear, thank you! 🌟🌻

[@taylarb7703]

This was a really great video! Thank you for all of your advice :) I'm turning 20 in under a month and I only just started my self improvement journey last year. I really appreciate seeing your perspective as someone who as been at this a lot longer than I have. It's really encouraging. The victim mindset and emotional regulation are the two things I struggle with the most but I'm certainly getting there. I'm great at bottling up my feelings and not communicating with people is a huge challenge for me. I've been seeing improvements in my mindset and how present I am in the world. Seeing that difference truly is amazing. This is the first time I've come across your channel so I'll definitely need to check out the rest of your content

[@Giuliafralenuvole]

I’m obsessed with your videos! You totally get what we’re dealing with and know how to fix it. Keep doing your thing!

[@Emileigggggh]

Needed to hear what you said about college - I kinda consider that a failure for me, because my various (not fully diagnosed) chronic illnesses and brain stuff kept me from seeing my full potential at that time and taking advantage of everything etc, and I got some pretty bad grades (mostly just toward the end), and all of this meant it took me a long time to finish, but I actually did get the degree in spite of all that. Which is an accomplishment, just not one that lives up to what I wanted the accomplishment to be, so I basically write off the whole thing as a failure. And on self-awareness, it's so interesting to think of in that sense, that I consider "self-awareness" to be "I suck and was wrong" and never "hey, that was a good way for me to handle that and I should be proud" or even "yeah, that could have gone better, but know I know better about these things for next time." When it comes to a "victim mindset," esp vs systemic oppression, I think a big part of it is the difference between what has been vs what will be. To assume you'll never get a good partner or job etc because you haven't previously is the issue. That being said, it can be an important first step to acknowledge that things in your past were pretty terrible and perhaps in that scenario you were victimized - but that doesn't need to be a foregone conclusion. It's also important to separate the specifics that might not be in your grasp vs what you're capable of and which specific factors could change to get you where you'd like to be (which can also be very difficult for people with disabilities). Like, I used to feel very "I can't work full time" because when almost every job was in-office 5 days a week, I couldn't - but lucky for me, now hybrid work is actually attainable and I can do a full time job. But if I figured "I can't work full time ever because that won't change" in high school when I first got sick then I wouldn't have gotten the aforementioned degree. It sucks that we need to work so hard to accommodate ourselves or to fight for accommodations or to see major system changes like the move to increased remote/hybrid work, and that's part of where working towards systemic changes comes in, but it can be a helpful thing to think about when trying to navigate life. There might be some things you need to say no to, and balancing everything energy-wise is constantly a work in progress, but I think it's important to think of these struggles as battles vs an entire war - you'll lose some battles, and that's ok, but never surrender and give up the fight when it comes to the larger conflict.

[@aislinnm.b.7458]

8:28 I'd love a video on self awareness! As someone who struggles with overactive self awareness, I've really been curious about how to harness it in a way that's healthy

[@bellumellu]

Thank you 🙏 ❤

[@kamilak6092]

I just found you and I love your videos. I’m learning to love myself and take charge of my life and your work has given me reassurance and a lot of guidance to grow and become a better me. Thank you you so much and see you in your past and future videos 💖💖💖

[@jazzmynt]

by evolving ourselves we evolve the human race as a whole

[@katcardenascruz]

just found your content recently and I love the self help advice you've been giving, it's been very aligned with my journey of self improvement :)

[@charlottemorabito]

I'm so glad the content is resonating and helping you, Kat. Thank you much for being here!!! 🫶

[@ketangle]

I agree with everything apart from the first thing. It's true that if you never go deeper than the superficial why you're chasing something, that you will remain stuck on the surface. And sometimes the root problems can prevent you from going further into things however it's possible for people to self discover through pursuits like a relationship or even earning more money because in order to sustain or get better at something, they have to find and overcome the root problems. Although it's also true that people can remain stagnant at the level they're at because they refuse to address the problems

[@charlottemorabito]

I agree. Bandaid solutions are usually the way someone discovers there’s something deeper. I specifically see this a lot with weight loss and relationship seeking

[@erikaruiz9048]

I am grateful for your content & channel ✨

[@itsokthen]

I really liked the way you framed the taking ownership of how you can control your own life. There's a lot of really small stupid things in life this can apply to that it's easy for me to just get frustrated at and give up on or just let it be shitty. I think an entire mindset shit not just on the big things but on everything can be something that keeps the self improvement ball rolling

[@bigefoot8076]

something you said reminds me of something my dad always has said to me: always run to something, not away from something. he got it from his boss on a construction yard back in the 80s. dad was long-haired, live-fast-die-young kinda guy at the time and was about to quit to go move somewhere else. his boss told him that as he was leaving one day. ended up going back to college the next year and running towards being something other than a criminal lol. anyway, my dad and i are very low contact now, but it kinda spooked me to hear something im so familiar with out of nowhere.

[@eyes1168]

thank you. I really needed this video. Subscribed.

[@lilthsson3904]

This is really cool I actually was motivated to start working on myself again after my dad died when I was 16 so i connect with you on that and im loving your insight so far but these are my questions and comments 1 I feel stronger motivation from unhealthy motivations why dose this happen and do you know how to change it? 2 I believe your enlightenment chart can lead to toxic positivity and repressing emotions have you thought about this? I feel like you must feel your negative emotions to release them and redo your conscious or subconscious unhealthy beliefs that cause unhealthy behaviors and thoughts what do u think about this? 3 I love what you said about victim mindset that kind of work saved my life but I think it’s important to remember that yes everything is (figure out able ) but the solution isn’t always what you want it to be and sometimes the only solution is acceptance of the reality of your limitations and how you can find joy and peace within them

[@badboysdontfear]

have you ever thought of posting these episodes on podcast platforms? I would love to listen to this via spotify when I am on my way

[@Lynn-jy1uq]

Thank u for talking about victim mindset. I didnt know i was constantly in it this whole time.

[@jeniushkarki5326]

Thanks for this video, especially the part about how victim mentality keeps us from chasing our life goals. Will keep coming back to these great insights. ❤

[@mamorudafirst]

Things we all inherently know, but need to practice. I loved your video! ❤ keep it up

[@chuck8478]

For those who might find videos like this frustration or discouraging: Your mood isn’t a choice. The human body and your consciousness is vastly more complicated than a simple decision to be or not to be a certain way. We can practice habits that foster more pleasant moods and there are techniques we can learn to manage when we’re feeling some sort of way, of course. But people don’t wake up and look at a menu of moods and pick depression or anger for the day. That’s not how being human works. You’re a vastly complex person with a unique combination of biology and experience, so it’s okay if the cognitive tricks that work for some influencers don’t work for you. No need to beat yourself up for being human, love ❤️

[@jauxro]

Right? I know influencers can only speak from _their_ life experience, but sometimes they're talking to a person so specific it's alienating to the rest of us.

[@film9491]

Thanks. I already knew all this but the reminder can be really helpful sometimes.

[@444flojones]

you are amazing. this is so accessible and kind and real. 💟

[@Berozgarboys.1]

Amazing content in this video! I rarely suggest anything in comments, but the book women’s magic truths on borlest is a game-changer. It provides deep knowledge on wealth and self-care that can really make a difference. Take care, everyone

[@rissa_mariposa]

Your channel is great, you have a knack for breaking things down. I search for videos on here to that aren’t too overwhelming (ie concise and easy to follow) but still interesting and informative. You’ve got all that to a T!

[@charlottemorabito]

Thank you so much! That means a lot. I really appreciate it and I'm so glad the videos are useful! ♥️

[@MissHale]

Thank you! You are so well spoken

[@juliak.1292]

girl you're so smart! i'm so happy i found your channel this early! thank you

[@Dropper_to_AKU]

Loved loved loved this podcast!

[@ayxeleatspaints]

0:40 pardon this comment being off-topic but i'm in awe after hearing that you are 33. you look younger than your age. wow

[@that_introverted_mom]

Yes, I want to become a better version of myself! You are my free therapy😂

[@tastedivinefury2198]

Ok what u said after the clip of the tiktoker was soo important to me as youre white. Its a dimension of nuance that isn’t found so much on KZbin anymore you’re completely right in what youre saying

[@Muddy8892]

I really appreciate your content, thanks for sharing your thoughts ♡

[@charlottemorabito]

Thank YOU for watching!

[@solindasol]

So glad I came across your content! Thank you.

[@tinaynicolas2688]

I love this video! Thank you for this

[@jauxro]

I'm glad I made it to the 8:55 mark

[@samantasee1986]

This video found me in a very necessary moment. Thanks for sharing your lessons ❤

[@imogencorker]

Love love love this as always!!

[@clumpybaker]

I have great life but I struggle to figure out what it is I want to do in life and I don’t even know where to begin for awhile I thought of self deletion as the answer and it still is always in the back of my mind but I find it hard to agree with people that say you can achieve anything because I never knew what I was achieving in the first place hopefully this makes sense

[@oliviajayward]

That bus driver was probably angry because he had to wake up early and is tired. It’s okay to not be happy all the time.

[@charlottemorabito]

There’s a difference between saying “be happy!” And “don’t let it get to you”. You can choose to let go of little, petty things like that. Or you can choose to let them build up and make you angry at life and the world

[@hathors_daughter]

thank you for being you and using your voice.💜 I need to know what the poster behind you says, please?😄

[@alliahkiefer3354]

i like your orange blanket and green couch :) it reminds me of katniss and peeta !

[@gogostephy1]

You’re such badass dude. Thanks for this video it was a true wake up call.

[@jackhash3193]

Charlotte, what does your poster day? Thanks.

[@hallyubaddie7952]

I'd love to listen to you if you'd make a podcast ❤

[@taivin.lorenzo5619]

Ooooo I needed this one BAD thank you SO MUCH for sharing it. That victim mentality has been subconsciously beating my ass and straining my relationships! I’m ready to stop now thankyeww

[@leporiaantic]

I am so confused as to whether I should feel and heal THROUGH the emotion, or to "let it go" as you said to be more productive in a society that doesn't prioritize healing the soul. There was another interesting video that you may want to look up and it's called "do not move an inch". I don't necessarily think this act of weathering emotions and experiencing the hell (instead of letting it go, actually feel them) is the best for some traumatized people or others with certain mental health issues though. I'm curious about your take on this, because there are a lot of awesome things that I took away from this. Healing paths are so varied I think, but this one seems more conducive to productivity.

[@Chucanelli]

For me it was a process to learn when to lean in and when to distract. Leaning in means sitting with the emotion (meaning the physical feelings in your body), yes, but it’s very important to nurture and care for that feeling as it’s happening. I had to imagine myself as a child to be able to start doing that, but there are lots of ways to get there, it just takes some experimenting to see what clicks. For acute trauma, there is the possibility of getting overwhelmed and spiraling and getting stuck in the horror, terror, grief, rage, whatever it is. I’ve come to recognize when it’s turned into a feedback loop, and that’s when distraction is the right move. For me, there’s good crying and bad crying: Good is when I can maintain the presence of mind to take care of the feeling and it passes on its own, and bad is the feedback loop and it just gets worse and worse. Having a therapist who can help guide you through this process can be invaluable; sometimes they can see what’s happening before you do, and they have the training and hopefully established trust to help you out of a dangerous spiral. One last thought: I don’t think “letting go” is something you can just choose to do. I think it’s something that happens when the big feelings have been allowed and cared for. It can be tricky, difficult work to get there, but once you find your footing, you can begin to address and process all of that pain. Hope that helps. ❤️

[@leporiaantic]

@@Chucanelli Brilliant! Yes yes yes. Thank you, I so needed this.

[@whatwhale5888]

​@@Chucanelli woah, so perfectly well said. Put into words exactly what I've been feeling, thanks ❤

[@nadiapai8511]

i love your videos. i'm grateful to you for the content you share!! 😊

[@TropeOlogy]

As a disabled person, currently unable to work, how would you frame that towards gratitude and joy? And manefesting a kind and gentle life. I am not sure how to do this.

[@nicolecreates6936]

You have to be grateful for what you have. I love the fact that I am able to access drinking water at any time I want. I am grateful I have a roof over my head and don’t have to sleep on the streets in the cold and rain, I am grateful for the internet and KZbin cause it brings me joy and entertainment. Many many different small little things are always easy to find if you turn your attentions to them.

[@jasminec8888]

I’m in the same position as you, I try and give myself some grace and allow myself to grieve the loss of my healthy self and imagine what compassion I’d give to someone who’s in my position. Sending you love ❤

[@TropeOlogy]

@@jasminec8888 I find it hard not being able to support myself and needing public aid, and the conversation in my country about disability and social support systems being expensive and almost a waste of money is effecting my mental health. And at the same time I am grateful. Deeply grateful that I have the opportunity to get financial aid, because I cannot support myself. But letting go of the shame and moving into gratitude… and is a journey.

[@abigail7496]

I know you’re not asking me but I’m in a similar situation. I have migraines and seizures, and my meds make me a little slow. So I can’t drive and can’t get a normal job. What I have to do is brainstorm everyday about what it is I CAN take control of. I can’t control whether or not I’ll feel good today, but I can control my behaviors and emotions. So in the morning I assess my physical capabilities for the morning, and accept where I’m at, but i still do what I can. Sometimes that is I can sit on the porch and enjoy the sights, sounds, and smells and that is a productive activity to me. As she spoke about in the video, I can sometimes get in a victim mindset. I was telling myself that I can’t work for xy and z, but in 2024 there are more ways than ever to make money. So I spent months brainstorming a job I can do that fits my requirements 1. Needs to be at home 2. I pick my own hours 3. Room to make mistakes 4. Something I enjoy 5. No cap on income: effort = reward. It took a lot of brainstorming but something finally came to mind. (Wish me luck on that journey!) also if you decide to go this route and make money online beware of scams and things that have a cap on income you’ll likely make very little. In conclusion: always do what you can and enjoy every little thing you can. Disability forces us to slow down when most people never think to do so, but we all need to sometimes. It’s a balancing act between self-discipline and self-compassion. Always be kind and never mean, but also honest and try your best! I always ask myself “am I doing my best?” then I act based on the honest answer I give myself :)

[@abigail7496]

I forgot to mention one thing: hobbies. practicing my violin gives me so much joy and a sense of accomplishment. So does baking. I want to find more things like these! ♥️

[@Just_This_Hayley]

20:10 wow love this quote

[@strwgelly]

how do you set those recurring reminders? with an alarm app? or do you have another manifestation app. ive been looking for a good affirmations app for the longestttt. affirmations i got from this video i will be using: i am valuable. i am good at this. i am meant for this [...] today could be the day that could change the rest of your life. is this a choice a person who loves themselves would make?

[@charlottemorabito]

I honestly just add them to my todo app as a repeating task. I check them off each morning or some days I’ll leave them chilling in the queue so I read it (therefore saying it in my head) every time I check my tasks

[@mymolou6279]

You are so good and inspiring! Keep up the fantastic work!

[@Ijbolivia]

i fucking love the information age

[@ichabod9424]

1:25 how do you realise it's a bandaid solution? is it always the case internal problems looking for external solutions?

[@yashyashyashy]

I just want reiterate what she’s saying. I’m the eldest daughter of an immigrant family and I could have leaned into that but I didn’t - I don’t get treated badly by anymore , coz I don’t expect it or allow it. Literally your reality doesn’t have to match everyone elses.

[@MiraCle0612]

found you two days ago . after one video i am subscribed🥰

[@senpack]

I LOVE YOUR CONTENT NEVER STOP!!!!! :3

[@NatyLJB]

You have a beautiful gift x

[@Kevin.Villatoro]

Love your videos ❤

[@erindabney2758]

Nope. I felt whole for most of my twenties. Then I married my husband and I felt overflowing. A little over a decade later, Chase Dabney ran off after a Taiwanese. Now there is a void inside me and nothing fills it. There is no replacement for the daily, constant physical touch that I can replace from something inside myself. That’s just one part of the the void. I think self-help/self-improvement would be more effective if the parameters weren’t so rigid.

[@h.3091]

The entire time I was waiting for you to say something that isn't said in every self improvement thing. And there was nothing, it just got unempathetic

[@charlottemorabito]

Would you consider your comment empathetic? I’m not sure why you would write this other than to try to hurt my feelings… so safe to say I don’t really respect your analysis. Good luck on whatever journey you’re on!

[@h.3091]

​@@charlottemorabito You don't get to say people 'choose' to be upset in your video and then when called out act like I am somehow trying to hurt your feelings... I think you have a very warped view of the world and I think this kind of thinking causes more harm than it helps people. I am happy for you that you are no longer "stuck" in grief, as you seem to want to celebrate in this video, but looking down on people who are in a "negative" state is reflective of a narcissistic survival strategy rather than a healthy way of life. This is exactly why these kind of entry level self-improvement tools should need transcendence, which your title seems to promise, and then it doesn't deliver. That is misleading, but then what you chose to share was also harmful. I am not going to engage with you any further.

[@machinedrum17]

You’re choosing to be upset and complain about her video, rather than broadening your perception and trying to actually understand what she’s saying. You’re literally a perfect example of what she’s talking about. People who genuinely want to improve understand what she’s saying without taking offense. Though you have the right to take offense, as long as you’re aware it’s keeping you stuck.

[@h.3091]

@@machinedrum17 Wow... that was a bunch of nothing.

[@pandaitis0157]

​@machinedrum17 everything you said sounds so cultish. "You think differently than me so you're not only wrong but your life is actually really bad too and I won't consider what you're saying at all."

[@confusedbutterfly]

Cause it’s 68 degrees outttt🍁🍃💃 7:10