What if the Stardust Crusaders ACTUALLY Flew to Egypt?

[@Viva_Reverie]

If you're watching this on premiere day, I'll be livestreaming a birthday stream right after this goes live!! Come join me on twitch!! www.twitch.tv/vivareverie It's my birthday (Or it was a week ago, March 12th, I may or may not be a little behind schedule (Where have I heard that before)), so it's time for a short fun upload!! I'd mentioned in my 15th Channel Anniversary video that I wanted this to be my deadline for JoJo Part 6 Stone Ocean But Really Really Fast, buuuut I got sent wildly off-schedule since FNAF 2 was supposed to be a quick Halloween project for last year and it ended up getting delayed into February of this year. I don't want to produce a half-baked JoJo Part 6, so I'll need a good amount of extra time to work on it. It is my next big big project I want done, but it'll be done when it's done, and I hope y'all look forward to it!! Hope to see y'all at today's livestream!! 💕💕

[@TurbotheFurbo]

TODAY?! :0

[@angelsartandgaming]

Behind the scenes, I mean Ruining, Diamond is Unbreakable but really really fast?

[@gladoseon4117]

Happy belated birthday!

[@Thatonerandohololivefan]

Happy late birthday!

[@jobulletchief8936]

Indeed

[@elcangrejo6634]

It was never implied that "THE SUN" would replicate the harmful properties of the real sun towards Vampires. But it's damn hilarious to think that DIO recruited someone who could kill him even by mistake.

[@android19willpwn]

Hamon can, and Stands and Hamon share a similar basis in a vague non-specific way, so a Stand Sun could well behave like a Real Sun when it comes to vampires specifically

[@thelastmlg2699]

@@android19willpwn is not that a stand can't possible replicate the ultraviolet light that kills vampires, is just that the sun stand didn't specifically showcase it's effects, so is possible that it could be a miniature version of the sun that lacks some properties and thus be fine to be around with dio

[@roxas5071]

​@@thelastmlg2699for all we know it could be just a big fiery ball with 0 uv

[@cherrybee95]

​@@android19willpwnstands are known as spirit hamon which could mean that the sun's (stand) rays could have hamon properties but that does raise the question of if dio could kill himself by touching his own stand

[@NintendoSegaGuys]

I find it strange that people keep assuming The Sun can't mimic the properties of the actual sun, for all we know it just aplifies and manipulates the existing sun's power, not like it was ever stated otherwise.

[@Paleowgh]

The funny thing is Arabia Fats has more screen time and dialogue in this video than he does in the anime.

[@Emily12471]

Implying arabia fats has dialogue

[@zap3231]

​@@Emily12471or screen time

[@jhur7588]

Same with Kenny G

[@MightyContent6]

FR FR

[@RushWheeler]

Billie Jean*​@@jhur7588

[@TLAF923]

And thus with DIO actually dead, Polnareff's forehead-squid mutates and turns him into a monster like it did to the Nijimura patriarch.

[@emblemblade9245]

OOPS OOPS OOPS OOPS

[@scrapfox3695]

*BOOM!!! sfx*

[@Lilly-fh7re]

Goopy Polnareff? ubububu

[@CptObvious]

And thus Giorno's group never learns about Requiem Stands, meaning they're unable to defeat Diavolo. However, Diavolo also never learns about Requiem Stands, so he continues on being a semi-normal mafia boss.

[@gastlybastion20]

Isn't that also the case for Dio's other minions than too?

[@dragothproductions]

“Bullets don’t go that high.” “Birds don’t go that high” fucking brilliant

[@MysteryEzekude]

Not even foxes can fly that high...Or planes.

[@estevez_company-ish2.mp4]

WHY CAN’T ANYTHING GO HIGH ENOUGH TO HIT A PLANE?!!?

[@Lovesick.Sagebrush]

true

[@zacglover3345]

​@@estevez_company-ish2.mp4Then let us attack them when they land.

[@genesismultiverse4896]

​@@estevez_company-ish2.mp4 WAIT WHAT ABOUT AIR?!

[@mr.l8723]

“What about that orangutan?” “He can’t summon a boat in the sky!!!!!!”

[@michaelkindt3288]

I completely forgot about him. I think he's the only one missing. But also he's an orangutan on the boat, so he would not have realistically made it.

[@arcaneTempest1]

Forever's Strength and Zz's Wheel of Fortune are both stands that attach themselves to their respective vehicles to allow the user to transform and control them. While the effects of a stand may disappear almost instantly, we can safely say this is generally not the case for the application of them. So even if they did manage to get Forever in a dinghy up on top of the plane, it would still take a good while for him to transform it into a full sized freighter.

[@timothycarney9652]

@@arcaneTempest1 Wait, it works by slowly tranforming a normal boat? does it have to be a boat because if they could have hijacked a plane with it then Forever could have flown a good chunk of the minions into range of the joestar's plane- also its hilarious to think about the circumstances that 1 lead to an oragutan getting a stand and 2 Dio recruiting it to work for him, then again the jojo's had a dog with a stand and I don't think that ever gets explained.

[@anunoriginalusername9311]

'Boats don't go that high'

[@gamingnamehere1560]

@@timothycarney9652 It's just bizzare

[@liamwhite3522]

Honestly, Kenny G making the airport really confusing, plus planting the other stand users within it to ambush them if they even start getting out would just... work, right?

[@Drip_Wooper]

They could make it work, they just needed to not be massive a*sholes to one another and it could go smoothly, but as we've seen with the occasional attempts at teamwork they had through the part, is near impossible, their prideful a$ses just wait for the other to get packed to jump in, and if the other survive they finish the job themselves, they only work toghether if DIO works his charisma-bullsh*t magic to convince them to do it... So in conclusion every could go right if they had just told DIO instead of trying to think for themselves, the overscheming bastard probably had at least like 3 'plane'-plans anyways, he doesnt pay them to think lol

[@fishyfishyfishy500akabs8]

@@Drip_Wooper since a good lot of them are morons it’s probably gonna turn into a FFA and they all fight each other. Except maybe Holhorse, J. Geil, pet shop, Kenny and Ice

[@AnAverageGoblin]

the problem lies in whether or not the DIO agents can work together and/or if their abilities can be used in tandem without severe issues.

[@ALEJANDROBLANCOFIGUEROA]

Shut up, Kenny

[@tiky6603]

Shut up Kenny!

[@CalebSmith-wc9jh]

Ok but Mariah using Bastet in the middle of an airport would actually be kind of useful

[@PrincessMatrix]

Except there wouldn't be any reason to touch the outlet since it wouldn't be so out of place in an airport

[@teo3066]

True, though a pretty tough environment to fool a specific guy into touching an electrical outlet

[@heheheiamasuperstarwarrior9281]

She could put the outlet in a really stupid spot like on a door or a mirror

[@EastofAll]

"Hey Joseph, I need to charge my phone. Can you plug it into that wall over there?" "Sure- aaaaand now it looks like I'm having gay sex with Avdol again." "What do you mean 'again?'"

[@samueljo7910]

Or, or, and hear me out now, she could put it somewhere where you'd expect to see one and plug in something

[@daenite2480]

How did you manage to make _summoning the unmatched power of the sun_ an anticlimactic ending? 😂

[@Akamisago]

Natural talent?

[@altu8590]

​@@Akamisago "Observe."

[@eleronpfoutz7823]

Lol

[@TofuofLight]

It was almost as anticlimatic as the anime “fight” with the sun xD

[@sunsunk9209]

I mean Araki found a way to do that too so

[@ossowl]

Kakyoin: We don't want to endanger innocent lives now, do we? Joseph: >:D

[@PoyoPowerPlant]

"See, that's where you're wrong, Kakyoin. We DO want to endanger innocent lives-" "YARE YARE"

[@the_doug_digital]

"I thought long-range stands could reach planes???" "Well, I suppose there are limits. Somewhere between a gun, cryokinesis, and the full concentrated power of the SUN!"

[@mariogirl8100]

BALDUR'S GATE 3 REFERENCE! I AM ASCENDING-

[@Marc-rk3mi]

DIO: Who the hell are you? Astarion: I'm you, but more of an ass and less of a dick.

[@Marc-rk3mi]

@@mariogirl8100 LIIIIIIIIIIVES ALL MORTAL LIIIIIVES, EXPIIIRE

[@GentleMarc1024-ye8xd]

DIO to Arabia: "WHAT IN THE SWEET HELL'S WERE YOU THINKING!? Activating your stand .. I WAS RIGHT THERE! GODS!

[@the_doug_digital]

@@mariogirl8100 I had to, they both got vampires

[@MatthewCYN15]

I think Enyaba would genuinely freak out if the Joestars actually took another plane 😂

[@theolanderdilag3872]

I'd be honest, if the forehead squids inside Enyaba wouldn't self-destruct because of the whole endeavor shifting like that, she'd die the same way... By legitimate aneurysms.

[@street_sign416]

@@theolanderdilag3872 she didn't have a forehead squid

[@theolanderdilag3872]

@@street_sign416 yes she did, it activated its self-destruct sequence during the start of the Steely Dan fight

[@shadow98004]

​@@theolanderdilag3872That only happened because Steely Dan used his stand to plant the Forehead Squid in her brain while he was doing the whole "haggling food vendor" bit with Joseph before the fight.

[@theolanderdilag3872]

@@shadow98004 oh nvm but why did it self-destruct though?

[@ivanbluecool]

Diavolo basically skipping parts to only the ending. Like a casual

[@crona3316]

I feel like even casuals wouldn’t dare part skip

[@Jono_Dio_Da]

@@crona3316 you'd be shocked at how many people don't know what the Stone Mask is.

[@crona3316]

@@Jono_Dio_Da i don’t wanna live on this planet anymore…

[@LogeMoustache]

I know someone who watched the series with this order : part 1, part 5, part 2, part 4, part 3 part 6

[@wayworner]

@@LogeMoustache Whaa?? You can't even follow any sort of cohesive story like that??

[@michaelkindt3288]

You know, this made me realize how much planning most of the standabilities required, and thus how carefully planned this must have been. They are unfortunately few stands that are good for when the opponent is already on the plane before you. (Making the airport really really confusing and then jumping them probably would have worked.)

[@dataroaming7512]

Maybe Hermit purple divination abilities might have helped them out of it.

[@carrotfuton]

There are few stands that are good if the opponent is on the plane *before* you, but it's hilarious that they sent Tower of Gray of all things. Vanilla Ice could obliterate the cockpit and/or the wings, then just float down to safety lmao. I choose to cope by believing DIO wanted to face them himself, just not until he recovered fully

[@luisjauregui2197]

​@@carrotfuton Well it's important to consider that Tower of Gray was famous for taking down planes, so they just went with him probably

[@sinteleon]

That's mostly because planes are OP than anything else. Travelling far above the trajectory of most earthly beings, at speeds far beyond that of most earthly beings. You'd likely need something that can affect man-made objects or natural environment indirectly to actually do anything (since to affect directly you'd need to actually catch it first) Of course, having a stand that can forsee the future does help a lot in this regard.

[@plaguelord22]

I think that’s what makes major character stands so op in comparison to other stands, with them often having much more generally applicable abilities that are good for fights overall rather than requiring prep time

[@BlazingGlaceon]

"_OUR WHOLE PLAN HAS GONE TITS UP_" ".. we had a plan?" In this hypothetical universe.. the plane wins.

[@Omeyrolx_OhMayRolks]

So...does this mean that Polnareff will turn into a goop monster like Okuyasu's dad, since he still has the forehead squid in him?

[@theworstchannelyouhaveever9573]

Yep. And so would other villains there I assume.

[@kdlsimondistefan47]

​@@theworstchannelyouhaveever9573 not everyone has the forehead squid, a bunch of them are simply mercenaries and things like that... And 2 women that are madly in love with Dio, which is funny because they also find the Joestars attractive

[@CeddyFeldmann]

Yep

[@Twillek1019_]

@@kdlsimondistefan47polneraff has a forehead squid/flesh bud

[@Tenebrio-Morio]

Why does everyone keep calling the flesh bud a forehead squid?! Is this an in joke I'm not aware of? A translation thing? I mean, I know that's a decent descriptor especially if you don't remember the actual name, but every thread I see here is calling it that?

[@dejinnthedjinn5311]

4:10 This is why DIO never did meetings with all his henchmen.

[@Omeyrolx_OhMayRolks]

3:17 I love that N'Doul is facing the other way, since he's blind XD

[@spensirmclife6549]

It is very nice to see all the Henchmen that were never designed to be in one place interact with each other

[@murlocmaster6192]

Polnareff killing the only dude who can easily reach the plane is golden and absolutly killed me, i find it so amusing that the ONE dude that can save this story just happens to have the ultimate grudge against them by som1 who is actully their ally this time around in this hypothetical scenerio

[@mcexistant664]

Wait Boingo's prediction came true someone did die! 100% accurate as always, what a champ

[@therealpyrotf2]

*somethree

[@mongo_mgoo]

@@therealpyrotf2 *somefour

[@joshuadelministro3104]

Fr fr!

[@thejuggernautofspades9453]

"Once a prediction is made it becomes fate, regardless how long it takes" Jjba part 6, stone ocean - jotaro kujo's face is split in 2 as the book shown

[@therealpyrotf2]

@@thejuggernautofspades9453 little known fact: in part 4, during the btd arc, when jotaro and the others finally fall victim to kira, his face cracks vertically into 2 and then he explodes

[@LiamRooney-be1ww]

“What about the other person for if they got on a plane” “You mean the baby?” “IT WAS A BABY!”

[@kyleandrewbaguio3878]

"GOO GOO GAA GAA, PISS OFF!!"

[@qwontz]

I'm sorry! We were camped out in Abu Dhabi, which as it so happens is NOT close to Hong Kong!

[@Ayana-LTLA]

@@qwontz Well then who WAS in Hong Kong then?!

[@binglover694]

"PRESENT!" "AND WHY DIDN'T YOU FOLLOW THEM TO THE PLANE ON THE PLANE!"

[@Hijiri_MIRACHION]

"Well, I was under the impression that I would be meeting them in a diner, NOT an airport! By the time I found out where they were, they were already past customs and there was no way I was going all the way back to my hotel to grab my passport."

[@kieranm2774]

Wow... We were all excpecting Purple Haze Feedback or Ace Attorney.. You're as unpredictable as Araki himself

[@andreidsavetf2]

We never saw Araki and Viva in same room.

[@kieranm2774]

@@andreidsavetf2 Bro... Is Viva having some sort of Diavolo effect?

[@NoelJohnCarlo]

​@user-hz6jz1gc2s Me too

[@connorfinnan8156]

Loved the implication of J Geil stepping in front of Polnareff only to get instantly stabbed. Dio never told him who he couldn't attack. Just to go messwith the gang

[@TheEpicGnome]

4:27 The Sun doesn’t go that high. In all seriousness though, I’m pretty sure it is implied that Arabia Fats’s stand is smaller and more proximal than an actual star, ergo why it was able to retaliate against Hierophant Green’s approach and attack the crusaders with projectiles.

[@starburst98]

Yeah, it's why he had to follow them close by in his mirror cart. He has obviously adapted to using it considering he had a mirror cart with air conditioning due to the fact he has to be close enough that he is affected by it.

[@simonservsuck6711]

It could still probably shoots heat beams at them thou

[@b.r.a.d.]

I mean, that looks pretty small compared to the actual sun

[@saucevc8353]

Yeah but it can shoot sun lasers at least

[@yrenekurtz5268]

In the manga it's said that the Sun is hovering at 100 mts. And when Hyerophant Green got real close to attack the stand really didn't look huge at all.

[@alttair17]

In the fangame 7th stand user, there's a joke ending where the crew does take a private jet on Hong Kong which is unceremoniously sniped by Pet shop and Arabian fats.

[@sunshowers3838]

Oh dang, I haven't gotten that one yet. That's amazing. XD Also, always happy to see 7SU mentioned in the wild. It's my favourite fangame of anything and in my top 3 favourite JoJo fanworks.

[@asdf4evr]

It's one of the many, *many* possibilities once you get Chaos Mode in that game

[@intoxicanyx4687]

4:52. *Get down the granny is about to detonate*

[@Rincewindl]

I like the lore of everyone dunking on kenny g but ACTUALLY, making the airport super confusing + an entire gauntlent of standusers would probably have been more than enough

[@timothycarney9652]

I like it too, but realistically I could see teh jojo's turning it against them, once they realize just how many stand users are arrayed against them, tricking them into getting into each other's way or taking each other out, to provide openings for the Stardust crew could be workable. Too many stand users in one place and you REALLY need good coordination or nonsense piles up fast.

[@alguien6462]

3:55 Mariah also shutting kenny off is funny because they end up dating in Demonic Heartbreak

[@popmister]

Wait fr?

[@calfriedman6981]

Huh???? Awesome, I need to read that

[@Pix6lbits]

It should’ve been me not him

[@downwiththethiccness]

@@Pix6lbits bro is down bad for baddies with a bra full of screws

[@Tenebrio-Morio]

​@@Pix6lbits you know that feeling, hold on to that, because once you see Mariah's design in demonic heartbreak, it'll be multiplied tenfold.

[@FelipeBasicos]

"Shut up kenny, go back to drawing mazes" describes how weak he is lol

[@Dr.Starbound]

Kenny G is really powerful when paired up. While most of the stands tend to interfere with each other, Kenny G synergizes really well since it gives him absolute control of the battlefield. Like, imagine him with the High Priestess, Set or Pet Shop? That would have been close to unbeatable. But alone? Next to pointless.

[@nidhogg8446]

@@Dr.Starbound Also the Crusaders lucked off with Avdol pulling a radar out of his fucking ass at the last minute or else they would have never Found him And if they didn't deal with him first the rest of the mansion would have been next to Impossible to traverse Arguably Joseph would have been able to help but that would take a while

[@vixshire3672]

Honestly him plus hanged man would Be BRUTAL. Imagine a mirror maze

[@Drip_Wooper]

​@@vixshire3672 there are so many absurd combinations that just never happened, imagine if the mazes got paired with either hanged man, or vanilla ice's cream (although I think that WAS the plan before Iggy immediately took him out) or him with Kakyoin

[@fl8281]

Oh my god they killed Kenny!!

[@devilred18]

In love with the fact that the sun was actually a threat here But only to Dio

[@ZekromRocks]

And Vanilla Ice

[@30watermelon.]

And dio's secretary

[@nado1908]

Hey, it still could have probably shot down the plane.

[@Saxdude26]

To quote Stardust Crusaders BRRF: LOL

[@havinearlong9055]

03:36 Enya: Why CAN'T ANYTHING go HIGH enough to HIT a PLANE ?!??! Notorious B.I.G. : _H E L L O_

[@jeanajoo267]

Tbf, Notorious B.I.G isn't anywhere NEAR Eygpt and probably was either a kid/not born yet at that time

[@tornadoawe]

Notorious would still be in the "Stand has to be setup beforehand" category though, since he got on Giorno's plane while it was grounded.

[@antonhagbox02]

Also, he needs to die for it to work.

[@UndefeatableTwilightCatgirl]

@@jeanajoo267 That's Carne. Notorious B.I.G. is the Stand.

[@xmaster1268]

4:40 dio: OH MY ME IT'S THE SUN! *Disappears*

[@JackalformerlyKnownasDjjjav]

First it’s DIO not dio, there is a difference Secondly dio means god in Italian

[@Solongsocialmedia]

*Undertale Dust sound effect.*

[@estevez_company-ish2.mp4]

Oh wow, did you just notice? My blood like, I can feel in my blood that DIO is actually dead now! We don’t need to go to Egypt anymore!

[@stavkous4963]

Basment dwellers emerging from their lairs after a month:

[@MountainMemelord]

​@@estevez_company-ish2.mp4Uh-Hey, Miss Pilot, can we turn around?

[@chdest4550]

This feels like the JOJO equivalent of "They should've taken the eagles to Mordor"

[@a-s-greig]

Air Force superiority.

[@RipOffProductionsLLC]

At least the Eagles have an excuse that them flying into Mordor coukd ve noticed and attacked by orc archers or the nazgul felbeasts or who kniws what other sirts of foul creatures/weapons/magic that might be there...

[@Ironwolf-pm7zs]

The thought of all the henchmen read congregating and arguing bitterly is so absolutely gut-busting. I love it.

[@timelessmoron]

Polnaref is only in Part 5 in this timeline cause he ran out of Bread sticks at home and went directly to Italy for more. He just happened to stumbled upon the arrow

[@michaelkindt3288]

This should be a "hypothetical land" video. Going to Italy to pick up breadsticks.

[@dusksunsetio6042]

“Damn they ran out of breadsticks? What kind of place is this I wanna go home” *polnareff trips on the stand arrow, somehow launching and plunging it into giorno’s back* *ger happens* “oh. well that happened.”

[@RipOffProductionsLLC]

Wouldn't Polnaref in this scenario end up the the Nijimura Brothers' father due to still gaving the flesh bud in hus head when DIO dies?

[@aethous9163]

2:32 Hol Horse: Bullet don't go that far... ...BUT DIO's KNIVES DO!!

[@Pryexel]

What if the plane is flying during the day?

[@aethous9163]

@@Pryexel DIO will be under umbrella, like Marceline from AT

[@michaelkindt3288]

​@@aethous9163-.-This makes me wonder what the stupidest workaround for a sunlight weakness fiction has come up with is, so that I can imagine DiO utilizing it.

[@tornadoawe]

@@michaelkindt3288 During the Yellow Temperance fight, i remember Jotaro using Star Platinum to grab onto a ledge to catch himself. Since that implies that a Stand can be tangible (*and The World is the same type of Stand as SP* /s ), i wonder if DIO could have just worn The World like a suit of armor? Something a tad hard to test without lethal consequences, but it would have been fun to toy with DIO pulling a Kars and circumventing his weakness to the sun.

[@michaelkindt3288]

@@tornadoawe-.-That sounds like a clever idea. But it is possible that stands inherent the vampiric weaknesses of its user. But his stand could be immune to sunlight, potentially. But more importantly, now I'm imagining deal walking around in a giant suit of armor.

[@The_Wnder_of_U]

4:04 I was 100% waiting for Hol Horse to say "Light doesn't reflect that high"

[@alicepbg2042]

that would be a lie...

[@absentcoder4552]

I mean the beam of light would have to be pretty focused. And what would happen if Hanged Man somehow missed?

[@alicepbg2042]

@@absentcoder4552hanged man moves TO a reflective surface at the speed of light... it can't miss.

[@The_Wnder_of_U]

Dont planes fly like... Thousands of feet high? I don't think thats in his range ngl

[@luckystriker842]

​@@The_Wnder_of_U Well, it is ranked A in speed. I just think it'll take a long time.

[@Ghostdog2411]

So no one's going to talk about the fact Tennille summed up the entire Jojo Bizarre adventure series in one question 'We had a plan?'

[@Pigpen_YT]

Dio having a baby and a kid work for him means he's technically breaking child labor laws smh. Who could've guessed Dio would break the law Great video as always!

[@yaujj65]

What do you expect? He’s Dio, obviously he commits many crimes in his time.

[@linishatopham1739]

This is the same man who burned his brother’s pet dog alive for fun, I’m pretty sure he’s cool with breaking the law

[@idosarts_and_krafts]

It's even funnier when you factor in that he wanted to be a lawyer (..... I don't recall where i saw this information, correct me if I'm wrong )

[@magicweegee2704]

I hope this concept of “the land of the Hypothetical” becomes a series.

[@ezralegum6236]

I want "What if Giorno had gone to the store instead of Narancia"

[@Sillyoddish]

Same omg

[@braedenmclean5304]

What if Fugo was actually useful

[@TheAustronaut03]

4:52 I need this as a replay button

[@FizzleBurger]

It took two rewatches for me to fully appreciate this, but 1:23 is the best joke in this video. The entire premise of this conversation relies on every one of Dio's henchmen getting on a plane that's FASTER than the one the Stardust Crusaders are on. Viva Reverie understands how ridiculous this is and is having a laugh at herself. And, in keeping with tradition, EVERY SINGLE ONE of these COMMERCIAL AIRLINES is using the SAME BIPLANE that Joseph flew in Part Two XD

[@I_do_stuff_like_games]

“Why don’t we all just… stampede them the moment they land?” *Everyone slowly turns to look at Dharby*

[@redstreak9430]

3:55 still funny how Mariah settled down with Kenny of all people if you count Crazy Diamond’s Demonic Heartbreak as canon

[@kennysalty6019]

Dio: "OH MY ME IT'S THE SUN!" Dio translated to English means God. Clever little bit of word-play.

[@DarthMolgy]

I love how Forever didn't even bother to show up

[@gagejohnathan9641]

He's a monkey. The ship is a standohgodtheshIPISTHESTAND!

[@23araujovideos76]

He was in the sea in Singapore, The Strenght is pretty much useless since he couldn't summon in midle of the Sky and he wouldn't have made it since the boad couldn't swim that fast.

[@francisfatta]

This would certainly lessen the bystander casualty count, I’ll say that But now that means we’ll never meet Polnareff 😭

[@squidpile]

Also judging by what happened to Okayasu’s father after Dio’s death, it’s probably safe to say Polnareff will become a monster

[@01100101011100100111]

But Kakyoin survives!

[@magicweegee2704]

But Polnareff killed J. Geil out of his own will, what’s to say he wouldn’t try to get the flesh bud removed?

[@brandongamingtv7545]

And in part 5 instead of polnareff meeting giorno, it would be jotaro and he would eventually become one with the turtle instead of polnareff Edit: SORRY, GIORNO, NOT DIO, MY BAD.

[@dataroaming7512]

@@brandongamingtv7545especially considering Jotaro never learns time stop and in later parts of Jojo he’s basically fodder without it.

[@joejunior5991]

Meanwhile Polnareff : UBUBUBUBUBUBUBU........ 🧟‍♂️🧟‍♂️🧟‍♂️🧟‍♂️🧟‍♂️

[@theworstchannelyouhaveever9573]

And N'doul probably would become a monster since I assume he had a flesh bug as well IMO.

[@joejunior5991]

@@theworstchannelyouhaveever9573 most minion except Okuyasu Dad, Kakyoin and Polnareff didn't have Flesh Bud since these minion either loyal to Dio (Pucci, Johngalli, N'Doul, Enya, Pet Shop and Vanilla Ice), serve him out of fear (Hol Horse, Oingo Boingo, Older D'arby and Nukesaku), Greedy Bastard (Rubber Soul and Steely Dan), Charmed by DIO (Midler and Mariah), Straight Up Psychopath (Devo, J'Geil, Mannish Boy, Alessis and Younger D'arby) and Unknown Motive (Every other Tarot Card User) He only use Flesh Bud for someone whom he wasn't trust and had weak willed heart

[@michaelkindt3288]

There's an auto translate, and all it does is remove the "BU".

[@Code_orange22]

​@@michaelkindt3288 that single bu was in French

[@DarthMolgy]

​@@joejunior5991Didn't Enya also have a flesh bud that killed her right before they encountered Steely Dan?

[@GunmetalGator]

This AU has no Star Platinum ZA Worldo, alive Kakyoin and Avdol but messed up Polnareff which means Kakyoin gets disabled by Diavolo in the near future. Holy… hope he doesn’t die in Part 5. And Avdol probably joins Part 4 as an assistant.

[@Ramsey276one]

Next hypothetical! XD

[@jakethebaconhair29]

Kakyoin stand Hierophant Green would also get a requiem form in part 5

[@desmondng5375]

Nah in this case Avdol would go with Kakyoin, and both Magician’s Red and Hierophant Green hard counter King Crimson. Diavolo is dead

[@TheRandCrews]

wouldn’t fighting kira would be easier for having a long range stand like Heirophant Green or Magician’s Red cause Harvest and Bad Company could’ve done it but they died 🤷‍♂️

[@ravioligould]

plus diavolo wouldnt learn about the requiem arrow meaning he would probably just be a regular stand user mafia boss. dio's diary wasnt burned jotaro wouldnt know he could stop time. and giorno wouldnt have GER or even met polnareff

[@parrott4634]

3:49 this was GOLD I haven’t laughed that hard in a while

[@TurbotheFurbo]

LMAO at the *spoilers* "oh my me its the sun!" wait does that mean Polnareff is like Okuyasu's dad now 😮

[@Fangria]

its possible by remembering his lifes mission he removed the starfish thing. that or the sun burned it off or something idk

[@KC_Garcia]

​@@FangriaI mean he removed the dio forehead squid somehow right?? right????

[@einschneiderchen]

I just realized, he said oh my me because Dio means god in Spanish/Italian

[@michaelkindt3288]

"Oh my me it's the sun" get it? Because DiO is Italian or something for God.

[@michaelkindt3288]

​@@einschneiderchen-.-Beat me to it, but I commented before I read yours.

[@corvus4350]

In the 7th Stand User video game there actually is an option to fly straight to Egypt but if you do Pet Shop shoots it down, giving you a game over.

[@return_h3669]

1:21 peak moment xD

[@lisamcrad5799]

I actually love that this video is in the old style of BRRF where the coloring was flat

[@Mayeur000Donz]

Still can't help imagining what a show it'd be if all Dio's minions just piled on the SCs all at once. It'd be like trying to win at a boargame that employs the rules of several additional boardgames.

[@timothycarney9652]

The victory condition relies on getting them to start taking each other out/get in each other's way until you can seize an opening to take out the rest. Really that would be inevitable with some of their powers.

[@agedstring]

And so Jotaro never got any severe trauma ...unless you count the serial killer with a hand fetish and Dio's gay priest who restarted the world twice

[@LumaSloth]

Less severe trauma

[@chickenwinna]

Oh no. The diary never got burnt.

[@PaintSplashProductions]

Would this mean he was actually in Jolyne's life?

[@elijahpadilla5083]

Probably also took much longer to figure out his time stop.

[@alicepbg2042]

@@PaintSplashProductions he was MORE in her life. yes.

[@soap-plant-guy]

Viva's voice acting on Enyaba is really impressive considering how much she yells in this. Like that "WHAT THE FUCK" at 4:12 blew my mind!

[@bigseven8227]

The humor of this channel is so quick but perfectly well-timed without it ever being annoying or confusing. This was a hilarious parody

[@yaraaltro]

Please do more of these Land of the Hypothetic shorts! That was hilarious!

[@teddverres4392]

Interestingly, in the SNES game, Midler’s High Priestess DOES get on the plane (and so does she)

[@sunshowers3838]

That game is a trip and a half. I still find it hard to convince myself that it's an official product. If I recall correctly, in that one you fight Grey Fly in the school toilets instead.

[@michaelcarlton1484]

RIP to Polnareff. Couldn't get his fleshbud out... Also, was it Polnareff who called on the phone? He's the only one that makes sense.

[@PaintSplashProductions]

I believe it

[@wingedbluj1674]

Well, he WAS the one in Hong Kong and he even mentioned spotting them getting through customs.

[@Abyss_Princess]

4:10 Thank you for that

[@DUKANUKE]

This was the most out of context moment in the entire video

[@OtherMomo]

I love your totally lore accuracte and perfectly consistent interpretation of Avdol's accent.

[@dark-death6982]

The fact that most of the video is just Viva screaming into the mic as Enyaba cracks me up

[@MyShiroyuki]

Knowing how the Jojo universe works, there would conveniently be another Stand user on the second plane.

[@Flipface4]

Okay this legit has me in such a giggling fit oh my god

[@-AirKat-]

fr I couldn’t breath

[@juon91]

I think I saw "the Sun" argument somewhere and they concluded "the sun" is not actully the Sun and possibly doesn't have right type of ray(UV was it?) to kill DIO

[@reeree772]

Nerd

[@EscuEsc]

Welcome to the land of the hypothetical

[@starburst98]

Ordinary lightbulbs can make UV light with the right materials. So saying a small sun would just NOT make UV rays because ????? Is silly.

[@LumaSloth]

It was probably me arguing about it on Twitter on a thread

[@Emily12471]

​@@starburst98 i mean, the logic is that its just heat and light from said heat

[@ivanbluecool]

Next what if: what if the cart Johnathan and his family was on didn't crash so they never met Dio's family What if Cesar didn't rush into the fight with wammu and fought him with Joseph. What if the antagonist was caught before switching faces. What if Giorno went to school What if jolyne beat pucci before he got made in heaven. What if gyro went into the light. What If gappy wasn't found

[@Set2Seth]

More interesting Hypothetical What if Buccerati died to Rolling Stones? Remember, It was because of Mista shooting the thing and taking the fall it caused all the events to occur in A WEEK

[@PaintSplashProductions]

Legit would love to see that second one. How different would the series be if Caesar survived? Would he have been with the Crusaders in the 80s? I NEED TO KNOW

[@DarthMolgy]

Back when Marvel's What If came out I came up with a JoJo version of the first season, and my equivalent to the Party Thor episode (though functionally it'd be closer to the Captain Carter one) was actually the "Carriage never crashed" idea. Here's how I imagined it: Going under the assumption that Dio may have been born after the incident or just because Fate works in weird ways, I'd say Dio might not be marked by the devil in this instance (it just works) so he isn't a complete piece of sh!t. He still poisons his dad but he deserves that, and after that he just moves to Ogre Street where he joins Speedwagon's gang and they become bros. Dio develops a bit of a sense of justice. Meanwhile Jonathan grows up happy with two living parents, a living dog and a girlfriend. He still studies the Stone Mask though he takes more time to learn the blood thing, and eventually holds a lecture about it which is attended by a lot of people, including secretly Dio and Speedwagon who plan to steal and sell the mask to make a fortune. In the middle of the lecture some Italian guy appears and says "uh this mask is responsible for the deaths of a lot of people including my dad please do the world a favor and destroy it". Jonathan is the only one to take him slightly seriously, but before anything can happen Speedwagon snatches the mask with his spinny hat and nigerundayos, leading to a chase. While running away Dio voices his concern that Zeppeli was right, but Speedwagon dismisses it before suddenly being brutally attacked by Danny. In al last ditch effort he puts on the mask with his hand tainted with blood, becomes a vampire and kills Danny. It takes a joint group effort of Zeppeli, Jonathan and Dio to defeat him and make him fall into the river, but Zeppeli is sure he'll be back and offers to teach Dio Hamon as he sees potential in him. While Jonathan lacks that potential, Dio offers to teach him some Ogre Street techniques. From that point on it's basically just Phantom Blood with Dio, Jonathan and Speedwagon's roles swapped around, and other than that doesn't change too much; however since Jonathan still marries Erina and they take the ship Speedwagon still takes his body while Dio ends up founding the Brando Foundation.

[@lightningboltyanyangayon263]

1:08 I just realized Jotaro changed his mind after he heard the high priestess😭😭💀💀

[@ARX_FXRRY]

3:53 SHUT UP KENNY

[@gladoseon4117]

SHUT UP KENNY

[@Monkey_D_Rufy]

SHUT UP KENNY

[@g.h-p5z]

SHUT UP KENNY

[@jameshurricane3169]

⁠SHUT UP KENNY

[@ytw101]

4:09 You made me laugh at work so hard i got in trouble😂😂😂totally worth it viva Thank you for your hard work.

[@DUKANUKE]

“Enyaba: Go, my child, and- Polnareff: I just remembered my life’s mission! Enyaba: WHAT THE FU-“ It was so out of context I love it

[@mariobrothersfan2792]

The idea that all the minions had their own super fast personal planes is hilarious

[@brasshydra1389]

I mean, even if Pet Shop or Hol Horse couldn't go high up enough to attack the plane mid-flight, they could attack the plane as it was landing. Destroy the engine, wreck the wings, disable the landing gear, etc. Knowing what flight they're taking means knowing where they're landing. Hell, they could even fleshbud an air traffic controller into causing a mid-air collision with the crusaders none the wiser.

[@trungdungnguyen6980]

Well here the thing, their attack range is way too short when comparing the cruising altitude of a plane of over 30,000 ft

[@yaujj65]

He is talking about the period where the plane descend. It is a period where either Hol Horse or Pet Shop can attack at favourable distance

[@desmondng5375]

In all fairness, Hol Horse’s stand is a small pistol, I doubt it can do enough damage that the pilots couldn’t still land the plane. And even if the pilots were shot, Joseph could just land with Avdol protecting him. And Pet Shop could destroy the plane, but it has the opposite problem, its stand is quite obvious. I can see Kakyoin shooting him out of the sky with no problems.

[@dennislessing643]

@brasshydra1389 that and you have Kenny G make the airport a maze, with the different henchmen placed close by the exists

[@raulargente1499]

The undertale sfx when DIO dies was on point.

[@SchneeflockeMonsoon]

1:14 The best moment of the video.

[@Molo_da_boi]

The entire plan was basically a trap all the way to Egypt, and they just went over it lol

[@timothycarney9652]

Its even funnier if you imagine that Dio might have had MORE minions trapping other ways in, that just got cut loose after everthing... Wait how did Dio know when and where the Jojo's were coming? he needed to for him to set the initial plan up in the first place, or does he just always have a ton of stand users on standby to look out for and take out his enemies?

[@pajamapantsjack5874]

Meanwhile in morioh, some very damaged pompadour wearing guy doesn’t help a car out of the snow. The timeline is obliterated.

[@lendavila80]

Oh yeah... I never realized (and neither did anyone else it looks like lol) Josuke never would have gotten his signature (really cool) hairstyle! But really, I wonder how much the timeline would change because of that?

[@pajamapantsjack5874]

@@lendavila80 minimally maybe, he’d still be a good kid with his grandpa to look up to so he’d still have a heart of gold, he’d just not be easily angered I guess lol

[@michaelkindt3288]

​@@pajamapantsjack5874-.-So they would then lose to the mangakist, got it. 👌🏻

[@DarthMolgy]

​@@michaelkindt3288well Rohan counted on Josuke getting mad to make him look at his manga. If he doesn't get mad, there's a chance he manages to avoid activating Heaven's Door before beating up Rohan.

[@michaelkindt3288]

@@DarthMolgy-.-Good point.

[@thegoblin4948]

Mariah yelling at Kenny G to shut up is extra hilarious considering they're married in one of the spin offs.

[@aimchik]

Meanwhile Forever, user of Strenght, in The Indian Sea: 🦧 🚢

[@Pikaman20008]

To be fair they would probably still meet Polnareff, not like they would immediately get on another plane, they still need lunch :D

[@Slipy61]

Your comedic timing has always brought a smile to my face, every single time without fail

[@dejinnthedjinn5311]

Kenny G did not diserve those strays.

[@lowrider993]

I like how no one tries to fly another plane up there to catch up to them and DIO never bothers checking on the Stardust Crusaders after the plane crash in this version, haven't seen part 3 in like a decade but rewatching the series with friends.

[@Sockums]

I COMPLETELY FORGOT POLNERAF WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN PART OF THE TEAM IF THEY DIDN'T CRASH 😭

[@sprite_but_not_the_soda]

4:40 "Oh my Me it's the SUN!!!" *dissolves into dust* that has me dying XD

[@arkauthor]

When the Hero does something more sinister the villain doesn't expect it.

[@nobled1113]

“Toboborbrbrbrbrorrver” “I just remembered my life’s mission 😀” *”WHAT THE FUCK!!!”*

[@Eggscramblercomms]

Jotaro never figured out how to deal with safe ranged attacks. DIO just kind of stopped using/ran out of knives. If they’re the same kind of stand, DIO should’ve just pulled out the World Finger.

[@thanksomuch1557]

this is hilarious, your writing never disappoints

[@Zach.Highly]

This is why you always have backup plans prepared in advance. 😅

[@Ishtarru]

Dio: Wait for it... (The plane nosedives and crashes) Enya: What? How did that happen? That plane didn't even have any of our assassins on board! Dio: But it did have Joseph Joestar.

[@yate0128]

Seeing all these characters talk is so fun

[@zoobatzjr371]

0:24 - 0:31 WOW THE PITCH CHANGE FROM OLD VIVA TO PRESENT VIVA. Keep putting the effort you sound great

[@saucefan1614]

"OH MY ME ITS THE SUN!!!!"

[@VexedSpartan117]

I like that either you forgot about Forever/Strength or Forever wouldnt have been able to catch a flight back to Egypt for this meeting on account of being on a boat and also a gorilla

[@kitestar]

Something tells me the mere implication that a reflection of the sun is strong enough to *unalive* DIO just for being in its presence is _hypothetical_

[@river8803]

I like to imagine they put E tier stand users near all the areas with airplanes just in case. “Ha ha! Taste my stand, Dave Mathew’s Band! It gives you mild tinnitus” “This is kinda annoying. Star Platinum”

[@sutoriimmortal2177]

Lol. Though realistically, even if you spread them all out in just Cairo, that's a crazy amount of stand users for one location. Araki prefers 1v1 fights in his manga, but thinking about this it makes a whole lot more sense to just say that team fights would be way too deadly for the heroes 90% of the time. Imagine getting jumped by 10 stand users at once. Not even necessarily coordinated stand users or even stands that were really really good. Just 10 random stand users. What combination of 10 stand users do you think any single one of the stardust crusaders(really it's just Jotaro at that point...) could survive against? Not many I'd be willing to bet.

[@b0x-guy]

1:46 goo goo ga ga piss off