What Men Really Want In A Relationship After 50 - Essential Tips For Women Dating Over 50!

[@srmrlr]

I didn't know to ask this question when I started dating. After my wife passed, I was literally lost. Interestingly, I found the person that matches all I wanted, without knowing I wanted all she offered. Physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual. Communication... Maturity. I know I'm lucky to have found someone I am so compatible with, so perfectly matched. Wants, needs, desires, plans for the future, foods we match at, music, movies, books, travel... And yes, sex... We can barely wait to see each other when we can't be together, and since we LAT presently, our time together is precious. We recently spent the weekend in Las Vegas, and came away from this trip with a better understanding of our future together. She has become my peace. How can anything be better than that? Your recent Limerance segment gave me a bit of pause, but I realized we passed therough the "limerance" phase man months ago. Infatuation, lust, desire, are changed now, different than our first months dating. We are 20 months into this relationship, every trip is a journey, an adventure. Every moment is perfect, and leads to more moments.

[@2ndActTV]

That is wonderful!! I'm so happy for both of you. And regarding the "limerence segment" - Dr. Salyer highlighted that the "emotions associated with a state of limerence" are fantastic to carry over and keep alive on a long-term basis. The key is knowing the difference, which it sounds like you clearly do! Thanks for sharing your experience!!🤗

[@srmrlr]

@@2ndActTV It took me a little while of sorting what I thought I was looking for, needing, before what I didn't know I wanted, literally fell in place with me. Being open to new ideas, experiences, is a big help.

[@ssiegreen5292]

B.E.A.U.T.I.F.U.L!!! And lucky!!!

[@martinsaunders7925]

Very important to separate needs and wants. Your previous wife,RIP, showed you what was desirable and lacking. What could be compromised, what could not. May you have years of comfortable joy with your new companion.

[@paulhansonattorneyincps9395]

Never get involved with someone with more problems than you. :)

[@carolinebrown8965]

Am 52 and on Match - found out what they want - a 35 year old

[@reflectiveFrankC]

A book on selling taught me something important that applies here. What a buyer tells you is seldom what leads to the sale. To explain in our heads men want their youth back and expressed in the looks of younger women but if given that without fulfilling the real want a deep relationship of love then it will continue as same ol same old empty searching.

[@martinsaunders7925]

Wants and needs are rarely congruent. The modern want is shòngnü. The need is for a companion. Very few men need something they can't already provide for themselves and few of them understand the futility of chasing wants. For that they only have to look at women for an example.

[@martinsaunders7925]

@@bryank.vaughan4316 there are so many fifty plus women who want 35 to 40 year old men. Again,wants. Life has,and will fulfill their needs. Indeed,throughout their lives, the men most suited to do this were invisible to them. I've learned to become invisible. To not be seen. To enjoy my peace with friends and the nature that surrounds me. No place here for the chaos and divisiveness women inevitably bring.

[@teresacroft7409]

​@@reflectiveFrankCmost guys want women their daughters or granddaughters ages. Men age, look older, not nearly as good as they did in their 20's. But their vanity and fragile egos tell them to go much younger. And those men are PAYING for those younger women (giving them money, paying for their rent or cars, and buying them expensive presents,). These younger women want your MONEY not you. And men really do look like old man perverts standing next to a much younger woman.

[@beachy9920]

@@bryank.vaughan4316 🤷‍♀️ I’m 53 and my lying cheating ex of 30 yrs cheated with a 26 yr old married Hispanic woman with 4 kids 😂😂 … he is 61. I found the comment funny and in my situation, was the best thing that ever happened to me bc I have recently met an old male companion from whom I knew in High School. Not rushing into things but it sure is nice having someone who enjoys my company and conversations ~ sex is pretty amazing too 😆 ❤️🥰✌️

[@rousse61]

I have been divorced since 2002 and most of the men like to play. They haven't worked on themselves and know that there are a lot of available women and keep moving on. So I have learned to be alone and content. Dating is a huge disappoint

[@vixter28]

Totally agree ! I keep running into men that have not worked on themselves and I have done my work so I’m not compatible with most ! Thanks for sharing

[@patricialavallee8286]

Come crying to you about the one that got away. Especially, if divorced..the women who dump them, treated them.like dogs are the one they're still.jonesing for. Still carrying a torch for Who wants to listen to that sing-song, ad nauseum? Bye! .

[@patricialavallee8286]

@bryank.vaughan4316 to a certain extent. However, and I've seen it, when men fall they fall sometimes harder than a woman. They hide it. Some carry a torch for a certain gal they never got out of their system. Decades later. Even when marrying another. Or, married more than once. The ,"one". Who treated them like a dog, and dumped them, not the other way around.

[@kerrygilsenan6459]

@@patricialavallee8286absolutely right…how does that make sense, holding a candle for the woman that treated them like a dog !!!

[@Snappypantsdance]

@@bryank.vaughan4316 your comments made me laugh. My experience is exactly the opposite of yours. Men falling more deeply in love than the women for the most part. And yet you are so adamant that your experience is the only way to see it. Maybe you have some self reflection to do. - just for reference, I was happily married for 25 years and lost my wndrfl hubby a little while ago to illness. Happily single b/c I think it would be hard to match his value now. So, not eternally single, bitter, needy, or a feminist.

[@azspeedster5465]

I have been a widower for several years after losing my beautiful wife of 30 years. I have become accustomed to living on my own, traveling and spending time enjoying my hobbies and hanging out with friends and family. Personally, I have no desire to date but I commend those who continue to seek companionship and happiness.

[@azmike3572]

Down here in retirement-area Arizona, a common saying of what many men are looking for is "a nurse and a purse".

[@vixter28]

Yup ! Here in Az too

[@georgesontag2192]

Women are never a nurse and a purse. Facts are they drop the sick husband off at the nursing home and never returns. Go ask a nursing home employee if it's the truth. The husband always returns for the sick wife.

[@marlowecastell3488]

Really true so it's time to go younger and what u want in a relationship...

[@marlowecastell3488]

I share that's everywhere ...

[@andreabenfell5580]

Definitely.

[@mypov4343]

The more you work on yourself the better relationship choices you will make. As always it's more about you

[@2ndActTV]

Absolutely!!

[@rousse61]

I took ten years out and find that many men have no desire to work on themselves. I find that they are either recently divorced and not working on themselves or the confirmed bachelor who plays.

[@mypov4343]

@@rousse61 yes what you say is true about men and unfortunately also about women for some reason improving themselves and being accountable just doesn't seem to register

[@robertvarner9519]

I like calm and quiet. Going to the library and reading a book is enjoyable.

[@2ndActTV]

Hi Robert, .... what's a library??? 😂

[@robertvarner9519]

@@2ndActTV 📚📚📖📖

[@kathleenleachman3629]

Where do you live Robert? I've always wanted to date in the library.

[@kathleenleachman3629]

Where do you live Robert? I've always wanted to go on a date in the library.

[@robertvarner9519]

@@kathleenleachman3629 You should visit your local library and select a book for a reading project. Happy reading 📖

[@westadam8890]

A compatable situationship. I'm a happily divorced 61yo male in a 4year situationship with a happily divorced 62yo female. In our case compatibility is key, as we both are in tune with each others likes and dislikes, and share the same life views including music, travel, food, political views, activities etc... not to mention, we have an amazing sex life. We know were never going to get married as we've both said never again. I think what makes our situation work is that she has her own career, house, car, money, investments as do I. While we do spend a lot of time together and share expenses treating each other, at the end of the day I don't have to support her and she doesn't have to support me as we each have our own home to go to. While this arrangement isn't perfect for everyone it works for us.

[@jcnlaw]

Sounds like you have an amazing connection! Enjoy!

[@stanford513]

Question: is committed monogamy a part of your relationship? I have been dating someone for 4 years very similarly to you. I told her on our first date that I’m not signing up for monogamy and that, though I’ll consider her and her needs always, but my needs will always come first and that I’ll allow no one the authority of telling me what to do. Her response was, “Sounds good to me. Me too!” I know it probably sounds crazy. But it’s working for us.

[@EllieM_Travels]

We are similar. First five years we lived as you described, then he moved to be closer to his children, I sold my place and moved for work, two years later we bought a place together and I stay with him when I’m in town. I travel a lot with my job. We live our own fulfilling lives and have each other as companions when we get together. It works for us.

[@westadam8890]

@@stanford513 Yes. We both had this discussion and both agreed we would be monogamous to each other.

[@Laura-rx9mp]

This my friend is a very desirable relationship and I would love to attract that. So totally agree. Cheers

[@ammasophia4663]

Someone who cooks well and loves to cook. Someone who loves them for who they are. Someone who is innately kind. Someone who is honest. Someone who is interesting to spend time with Oh wait... both men and women want the same attributes.

[@GBU61]

If I have reached 50 and I still have to ask what I want, then I am probably not ready to be in a relationship and I should stay single. I see so many guys who are so needy that they will compromise what they want just to have a woman in their life. All healthy relationships include trust, respect, honesty and a mutual desire to want the other person to be happy. If I do not have good communication skills to ask the questions then I am my own worst enemy.

[@jimg6476]

As a man in his 70s.. been married twice. Back in the dating pool. What I want is a woman that gives me peace in my life without drama. Someone that is loving compatible and easy going.

[@auntiemame7076]

Sooooo, someone who puts up with your crap and doesn’t complain. Good luck.

[@deank.4169]

@@auntiemame7076 ya, that says more about you than him.

[@formicapple2]

I’m 69. I want women to be polite, not sarcastic, not rude and considerate of my feelings. Sex would be nice but not essential.

[@sun-man]

I'm 66 and my wife of 41 years died 3 years ago. I haven't had a date since and I'm becoming content with living alone. I have lots of money so I travel. Finding a new mate late in life is very difficult and the stats show that less than 5% of older widows and widowers remarry

[@judy5936]

I too was in relationship for over 33yrs (my choice to leave him) and it took me over 2 yrs to feel content to be on my own, living alone. At 64 I still work have a large extended family, many acquaintances, few close friends and I now enjoy my quiet times. I look at life differently and it’s all about fun, experiences, and truths. If someone comes into my life great, if not that is also great. I am not wasting my remaining years looking for a relationship. Sorry, my truth. Have a glorious day and I will even though the Phillies lost…ugh. Lol.

[@sun-man]

@@judy5936 Good thinking. The US Census Bureau estimates that each year, out of every 1,000 widowed men and women ages 65 and older, only 3 women (0.3%) and 17 (1.7%) men remarry (Clarke, 1995). I love my freedom, and time is of the essence.

[@halfcentury1112]

Speaking as a 57yo - NO DRAMA, a companion and friend - definitely need someone who gets being a parent. I would also say life experiences and expectations are uber-important. Also I don't want to feel like an ATM...

[@andrewbird57]

Robert has a good grasp on this material. He touches on still having life goals post-retirement that don't involve being glued to the couch watching Netflix all day and getting fat(ter). My sweetie says one of the things that draws her to me is that I have ambitions of things I want to accomplish in this stage of life. She says so many men she meets through the apps have no goals in retirement except to drink beer and not think about anything important. Or all they want to do is play golf, which she is not interested in. I appreciate that she appreciates that in me, and it brings us closer. She came out to watch me play a softball game for the first time last week, and it meant a lot to me. Of course I botched a few plays because she was there. We are planning our first travel together in a few weeks.

[@2ndActTV]

So glad to hear how you are coming along, Andrew!! This is such an alive and exciting time, cherish every moment!!

[@TheHighwinder]

My motorcycle doesn't cheat, creates no drama, doesn't b1tch, makes no demands, and has an off switch.

[@samscarletta7433]

🤣😂

[@lindagonzalez435]

Pretty awesome if a motorcycle is all you need. Enjoy

[@TheHighwinder]

@@lindagonzalez435 it can be surprising the things people pass of as "needs" that are actually only "wants".

[@auntiemame7076]

Enjoy your solitude with your bike

[@jamieseiple]

repairs are cheaper too

[@auntiemame7076]

I left a comment about men needing to grow up. Neglected to say that I so appreciate this channel and the beautiful energy behind it!

[@lilstkngal]

i never dated, just w the one i married. My baggag is im on the shy mode, i tend to be laid back not making fun choices. So at 72, i dont date as i been divorced 2 1/2 yrs. I dont see going out in public meeting up w men. im just going to be single.

[@godzillamanstreb524]

Robert is such a fantastic guest….. I really learn a lot from him….ty!!

[@2ndActTV]

Glad you think so! We like him too! 🙂

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

Older men want a nurse with a purse. A caregiver into their old age.

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

@bryank.vaughan4316 It's to keep creepy old men like you out. Btw I don't have a channel.

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

@@bryank.vaughan4316 Go take your meds dude

[@DeshaunExitRealty]

Yes and many “older” men are strong and virile. Especially if they have a beautiful lady cooking. ;-)

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

@DeshaunDamon Some men...Definitely not many. Definitely not the average older man.

[@deank.4169]

and women just want help, and a retirement plan. They spent the first husband's winnings already.

[@flopoirer6957]

Great conversation, thank you! It would be great to see a video on how to make a relationship last after 50

[@2ndActTV]

Thanks, glad you liked it. We do have lots of content focused on "making a relationship work" after 50, perhaps the titles don't always project that. Thanks for watching!

[@csstudio3648]

I enjoyed this conversation, lots of good info. Silke, you and Robert always have great energy and exchanges!

[@2ndActTV]

Thank you, CS!! I definitely enjoy having Robert on!!

[@privateprivate8366]

It’ll be difficult for me. I am a black woman in my late 50s, never married, no children. I’ve been able to mostly just live life on my own terms, having a career and pets. I’ve wanted to fall in love, but that compromise.⚡️😅 It’s also become exponentially more difficult for me, because I realized, about 7 years ago, that I come from a narcissistic family and I was the major target. So, between learning about this, the trust issues and dealing with neighbor after neighbor, who doesn’t like boundaries, as if that’s my problem, has been a turnabout for me, positively and negatively. Aesthetically, there are other issues. While people tell me I look 10-20 years younger than my age, sometimes, not only do I know better. But, I don’t feel attracted to men my age and older, although I don’t sync up socially, with men much younger. Women tend to look more manly and men tend to look more feminine, as we age. So, thinking about sex kinda turns into mush. I’ve also had the impression that some men are really looking for a hospice wife or their mother, neither of which I am, so that cuts me out of the dating pool.

[@auntiemame7076]

While I am not black, I am a woman in her mid 50s who has never been married and is realizing I may never have that opportunity. I have seen too many girlfriends who have married out of desperation and their lives seem miserable.

[@privateprivate8366]

@@auntiemame7076 yes, my mother married 3X and, although I could be completely wrong, I’ve had a hidden suspicion that a whole lot more people than we know, are simply coexisting. That it’s more about being with the devil you know (husband or wife) and that the mortgage is paid on time, which is really a convenience factor, than them really being able to stand one another’s company. I’d still like to fall in love. But, at my age, there’s that trepidation that someone’s going to ruin what life I have left.

[@DeshaunExitRealty]

Will you please elaborate on “ the compromise “?

[@DeshaunExitRealty]

I’ve met tons of black men in their 60’s who are athletic and virile . Why do think you’re not meeting them when you’re out and about? I’m confused.

[@privateprivate8366]

@@DeshaunExitRealty I’m not out and about as much as I should be, I also have no problem dating black men or dating out. I think 2 of the issues are that, although I am not someone looking for a sugar daddy, I don’t find myself to be interested in men who have zero prospects, whatever their race. I’m a bit of an ambitious person, I’ve had friends that have no fire in their belly and it just drags you down, until you put some daylight between you. It can also be difficult dating men who are older, because I may not find them attractive. Some older men are also looking for their mother. Lastly,‘is my weight. I have found it difficult to shed the proper amount of weight, as a desk jockey. Weight is not attractive to lost men and that is on me. I do know it’s an2 way street and, while I don’t mind a man who is stocky, I’m not going to be on a steady schedule of feeding a man who is dedicated to being overweight. There’s also probably some squeamishness on my part, after being free during my adult life. Probably runs along the lines of, “Oh, so now I have to work my career, tend to my personal pursuits and my pets AND take care of you? I don’t know about that. I’m getting older. Not younger.”

[@sandiegochocolatefountains]

Robert is definitely my favorite 2nd Act TV guest👍👍👍.

[@2ndActTV]

He'll appreciate hearing that!! Thanks for watching!

[@lydiahiby7543]

Always great guests and topics👏👏

[@2ndActTV]

Glad you think so! Thanks for watching!

[@paulhansonattorneyincps9395]

Good companionship

[@mypov4343]

As far as tips for women, be honest and ask yourself if you're looking for a provider and what level of priority do you want to be

[@rousse61]

Can you clarify that? Looking for a provider? That isn't me

[@mypov4343]

@@rousse61 that's great! Unfortunately there's a set of women that believe in hypergamy and no fault divorce and social media can influence that behavior. It's not all women though

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

Looking for a provider? Lol. No thanks

[@stanford513]

Comments are super interesting. Most women I’ve dated want some kind of help because life is hard… not necessarily financial. Just help around the house.

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

@stanford513 Most women learn that easy fixes for stuff around the house can be found on KZbin

[@eddy2561]

Regarding red flags, I've been dating a beautiful woman in her 60's (I'm in my 70's) and after 7 months dating (with a 2-month break from each other) we have an amazing physical relationship together! However, my red flag is she's emotionally very distant, I'm usually the one to call or text first and I'm the one that plans all our dates. And I'm the one who does most of the flirting telling her how much I miss her when we're not together. I know she has red flags concerning me. Rhonda is very insecure about her looks even though she's gorgeous, definitely a 9 or 10. Knowing this could all end tomorrow, right now, I chose to ignore this red flag and accept Rhonda as she is. Tnx again Silke for a thought-provoking video. Any advice to offer? -eddy

[@ssiegreen5292]

Body image can be a real b*tch! At any age - and especially if one felt unappreciated in a previous relationship and been told one is dumb, stupid, too fat, too skinny, too wrinkly, too - whatever. So maybe letting her know how beautiful she is to you, might go a long way in boosting her insecurities. If you know what she perceives as your red flags, address it in an open conversation and actually hear what she has to say, without speaking over her or telling her it's all in her head. Don't gaslight her or gloss over her concerns when she speaks what is her truth. Knowing how her previous marriage [assuming she was in one] ended - might give you some clues too. Pending mortality makes us all look at the other person with new eyes. So if her previous husband died, instead of divorced her - she might have more of an issue with your age difference than you are aware off.

[@georgesontag2192]

She has the avoidant disorder. She will never get close to you..... never ever. She doesn't have love to give you.

[@jackdeniston6150]

Get a side chick.

[@DaphneMarina88]

Men call and plan the dates. She allows you to be masculine. Men initiate flirting and congrats on going strong.

[@Naturehealingperspectives33]

Ask her directly about it. Be brave for rhe answer. Communication will bring you closer or show you the underlying issue either way.

[@TinaJohnson59]

I fell in love with a man I met online who is 10 years younger than I am. He will be 56 in September but he has had a “player” rep online and admitted to being “unhappily married” and that he and his wife swing. Plus they party a lot like teenagers. That is sad. I think he now is realizing why he was doing that. He told me he has “trust issues”. And he is a poor communicator who is not in touch at all with his feelings. But I could see behind his mask and see a very sensitive tender guy. There was a very strong energetic connection between us even online. He knows I am not into any of that. He flirted with me AND his wife has too! Talk about confusing! I am very empathic and psychic so I tend to see his “higher self” or “true self”. I think I scare him because he feels vulnerable around me because of that. He knows I won’t put up with his “lower self”.

[@christinamckinney2370]

Peace!

[@33Jenesis]

I am retired and no child single. I am not looking because men my age or older most do have children and ex wives. I don’t want my time and mind be affected by his family.

[@queenofwands111]

I am wondering how important it is for guys to be a good companion (supporter, provider, protector) and to have a good companion in the means of being there for each other. Rather than just wanting to have fun. Where is the giving to each and being there for each other other in all of this?

[@queenofwands111]

​@@bryank.vaughan4316so why are you asking this? A man should want to give and be there for his woman intrinsically. As well as a woman should. There is no "he first" or "she first".

[@ralphverboten8816]

Those days are over! Get a pet.

[@queenofwands111]

​@@ralphverboten8816so what's your part in a relationship then?

[@karynmartin2141]

My ex is 65 years old. We recently reconnected. I just turned 60. He told me I was too independent and that I had high standards. Before we reconnected, he dated a woman 16 years younger than him she was toxic, and it was domestic violence in their relationship. He has not healed from this person. But he is still looking for a modern-day woman he can control. He says older men have resources that younger women want older women to set in their ways. Idk...

[@sunmoonstars0369]

Sounds like he's not attracted or attracted enough to you. These excuses only come up when they want out or to keep you hanging.so they can look around.

[@sunmoonstars0369]

Never drop your standards the right man will be where your at and not try and have you lower yourself

[@ralphverboten8816]

@@sunmoonstars0369She is better off getting a cat! 🐈

[@auntiemame7076]

I wish you luck in deciding what is right for you.

[@earthangel2590]

Run like your feet are on fire and your butt is catching!!!!!

[@patricialavallee8286]

If you can find companionship, fine. Keep your own money. Own home, own life.

[@patricialavallee8286]

@bryank.vaughan4316 alot of women made bank. Wanted a meal ticket. Even if had a career..

[@patricialavallee8286]

@@bryank.vaughan4316 true. Some get a chump they can use, even though they have a good career. Gives them freedom in marriage to do their own thing, have their own life. Usually, the men pass away before the woman, then the big payout. On to next chump in their golden years, one with bigger bank account and an even bigger heart.

[@reflectiveFrankC]

Your presentations are getting deeper and I appreciate that. Your headings seem to be too repetitive to me missing the Gold nuggets to be found within. People shouldn't judge on covers but we do so the right title can draw us in provide it is truthful. Example Could men over 50 be seeking the real you for a relationship? Still not perfect but a bit different. Like I said today was moving into deeper waters which most with some experience want and are willing to search for.

[@2ndActTV]

I hear what you're saying Frank. However, the more sophisticated or clever a title is, the less likely it will be picked up by search or key words. Unfortunately we have to "dumb down" written content in order to get the views. I do attempt to make the titles as reflective as possible, as well as "catchy" to stand out on KZbin. Thanks for your input!!

[@reflectiveFrankC]

Thanks for enlightening my perception on titles in relation ship to key words in titles. My more humorous side says the word gold in the title might also add clicks in human minds.

[@rozdevin2468]

Every man and women are different and desire different things

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

I don't want an older man...never did.

[@jackwolfski]

You do not always need to be in a relationship to be happy. Peace , quiet , and freedom are so overlooked because people are so needy of other people. I am not against relationships but if it is at the expense of my peace and freedom then a relationship is not necessary at this point. When you have run around like a chicken with its head cut off to please a woman who can not really be pleased then you have to regroup and figure out whats best for you.

[@2ndActTV]

Yes! Totally agree! And that goes both ways. Single is Much better than an unfulfilled and chaotic relationship!

[@TinaJohnson59]

Silke I am sure you’ve heard this before, you sound like Marlo Thomas.

[@tbobtbob330]

I'm 55, financially independent, in the best shape of my life, and could easily date a LOT. However, I decided 2 years ago that I have nothing to gain and everything to lose by having any sort of relationship with a woman. I don't ever plan on even dating - much less having a relationship. I've had a lifetime of a wide range of women and relationships, so I know full well the vast difference between what's advertised and what's actually received when it comes to women.

[@SuperDflower]

Your comment makes me sad

[@tbobtbob330]

​@SuperDflower yet I'm far happier, more content and more fulfilled now than I ever was as a husband or boyfriend. A man who learns to be content alone will be far happier in the long run.

[@dbadgermannc.8252]

Yes, happy being alone, have a few FB's, 66yro fit w/ decent $. Funny how women approach me all the time. Just usually meat & smash !!!

[@lindalou64ful]

Do you feel your advise holds true in my 70's too?

[@2ndActTV]

Sure! The "after 50" title is really more to search and to target our "niche" audience - people over 50. Plus, our channel ranks high for anything with "over 50", does that make sense? Thanks for watching!🙂

[@MelindaMabry-u2m]

When you are a wonderful woman, loyal and not ugly and not a cheater and many wanna play around with many

[@staceykersting705]

I meet guys who are either looking to insult a woman or looking to move in and sponge off her! Either that, or instant bang. I get asked out. Never done online dating. I don't think men just want to meet for a drink on a patio with nice music and some conversation/get to know u.

[@dewholdingsllc1050]

Interesting, after a 20 year marriage we were never compatible. Oil and water. Marriage is overrated but for having children and they put extra stress on it. Thinking about what type of female I may be compatible with in the near future. It is all about timing and where each person is in their life journey. You can still seek and have variety after 50, 60, whatever. No age limit for variety. It may be the best way for folks that have been in a many year marriage. My 2 cents.

[@Mikexception]

Life journey sounds to me right. There is no such human like 50 years old (or any old) . Every person with years reaches new positions in that journey. We call it experience. To me life is journey where I create and receive in areas of interest which I already started to learn about. As child I had this area at home , later in wider area in school, unversity under still deminishing parents care. After work with partly personal independence (it is full only when both parents are decesed) and after knowing far countries and people there,, at end watching stars in nightsky. The same is journey with relations and marriage - it is journey with experiences - still knowing more and more about close people around. Not all of us reach the same area at the same age. For me I was married with chidren for 22 years divorced also for 22 years, I've got a lot of life happenings and experiences. . Many retired people at their final years dream about turist journeys , knowing other countries, personal developement, cars, luxory. Realy I do not dream to endorse it. Because now I prize silence, peace. of mind and selfcare observing and thinking. Let it be the basic answer for question stated in video. Through 55 years experienced enough enjoyments. Working in far east and middle east for years visiting tens countries, admiring there people, food unusual culture and carried job complications . But when talking about more ideas for above 50 yo I still would like to know open minded woman with whom we both could dive into our spiritual souls. But such woman are rare. No need for me nurse, purse - it is like option . . Overal having morning caffee made by admired by me woman I consider most tasty It would be like to find woman with soul to explore I expect it could be never boring.. I need to mention I had such one woman in past, unfortunately too short. Very wise and admirable . So I know what I am talking about. I know already that we all change with every day of life. To learn about someone every day makes for me sense. But it looks as impossible dream because we know how accidental anger and aggresion by different reasons can spoil communication between people

[@cecilang9721]

Stage 2 is compatibility. Stage 3 is adaptability. If you can reach stage 3 then you can stay together. Stage 1 is attraction. Most people over a certain age lead with the sordid tales of their exes and divorces and NOBODY is into that. Anyone looking for a “hero” or “nurse”, forget it. Don’t use the word toxic in your first dates to refer to anything or anyone. Don’t talk too much about your kids or grandkids. Absolutely do not talk about your physical ailments. Gross. It feels like people have forgotten how to date politely and positively and ramp up excitement. If you are wondering, if I can’t talk about those things what CAN I talk about? Then you need to work on yourself and get some interesting hobbies and goals. If you don’t have any, that’s why it’s more exciting to date a 35 or 45 year old.

[@grandmaoldschool7011]

So agree with you! Let us not compare physical ailments! Can you believe I dated a man who discussed his constipation at dinner!? That was the end of him...

[@dabbler1166]

It's MORE about what i DON'T want. By far. #1. The absolute worst thing, the most critical thing, right from the get-go, is ANY first Date where I feel like I'm being-grilled-by-the-Personnel-manager..."So! Where do you see yourself 5 years from now?" I actually had that happen on a first date in the first 20 minutes. Immediate Huge turn-off. I have a Job. and my own Place. and a Car........go marry a downtown Investment banker or Attorney. 2. If something they do is annoying and you politely say you dont like it and they say: "well..its no Big deal". RUN! Now! Because almost guaranteed they will also have 4 other things they will say are "no Big deal". Save yourself the aggravation. 3. Its bad when people cant, or wont, explain their feelings. "I dunno, i just feel that way". Ughh! But what makes you feel that way? To the exact same degree that they won't, or cant, say-- they are to that same degree horribly out-of-touch with THEMSELVES! No insight. No psychological growth. "Next!" While there are no guarantees, if you can avoid those 3, you have a MUCH better chance at Compatibility.

[@dgasmd1]

As someone divorced, 53, and after several long term relationships, I can say the one thing that is extremely hard to find from a man's point of view is a woman that adds to your life/plans/journey rather than provide more expenses, heads, and limitations. Most women, regardless of what they say or pretend, are barely surviving financially and have little to support themselves in the future, much less have anything to thrive alone. As a man that is on the opposite end of that spectrum, it is hard to find anyone that can answer well the question of "what's in it for me other than 2nd hand sex"? There is, and plenty, a woman can add and bring in return, but the vast majority have zero to add. Just my limited experience.

[@annabrahamson4320]

The ones who are self sufficient probably aren't interested in a long term relationship with a man.

[@museti-zd2ee]

Dating is a fun sport 😂😂 I look it it like real estate. You look for a property, and you check if everything is in working order before you buy it.

[@robertschriek1353]

Peace.

[@Laura-rx9mp]

forget a man in their 50's!! how about men in their 70s?????? if I were 50 I would want a man in his 40s lol

[@kenberry8504]

Question: What do men over fifty want? Answer: A hot twenty-five year old?

[@grandmaoldschool7011]

😂😂😂😂and a ham sandwich.

[@bretburgin7857]

Silka please put your headphones on and listen to your video, I love the content but the bumper music hurts 😮

[@2ndActTV]

Do you mean that the open music is too loud? I will listen and thanks for the feedback. Glad you love the content!

[@jamieseiple]

What do men after 50 want from a women? Really nothing. There is nothing a woman could do for me I can't do for myself cheaper and better. I'm being honest. Please tell me what I'm missing. Thank you!

[@2ndActTV]

There are lots of people who are perfectly happy being single and not missing anything. Perhaps even just the opposite, as you imply. Nothing wrong with that. Thanks for watching!

[@georgesontag2192]

I want a woman that doesn't petition the court to take my house and land. Haven't found one yet. But still trying.

[@susanhaines7358]

How many times have you been married 😮

[@teresacroft7409]

I've supported and done well for myself. I've ran into a lot of men that want my possessions too. Won't get married or live with someone so I won't loose my possessions/money to them

[@interestingtimes6242]

It's happened to too many guys I know. Half the women I chatted with through dating apps asked one question, how big is my house? When I replied I don't own one they all ghosted. All of them.

[@shoshanaelishevalevy3838]

lol I am 54 with 2 young children One 9 year old and a 7 year old with Down Syndrome. I wonder what middle aged man is interested in that. My husband wasn’t. 😂 I’m not looking , but if I do look I will look 10-20 years down . 😜

[@karronfisher4188]

I think it is important too do the work on oneself.dont waist time on blaming other person. Make sure you reward yourself,give to the community, find great hobbies too be passionate about,love your family and keep searching for God's wisdom,his love,help others that need a helping hand without feeling you are all that!, love yourself without ego,apreciate difference ! Smile at everyone,you will find your better half! But you see all these things take time no time for blaming. 😊

[@sparkyin3d]

Best comment ❤! Thank you ❤

[@stefanhartmann8985]

!! how Y deal with life !! and lively I life

[@rodneyjaynes2485]

I definitely don't want a woman with a voice deeper than mine! My mind is not 70+ and my body is not 70+, why should I "settle" for a 60-70yo with all kinds of problems? My barber asked my age last week, and he had me at 20 years younger! You can't stereotype people because of their age. I'd be very happy to find a COMPATIBLE woman my age, but I don't think there are enough that I will find one. They are too set in their ways.

[@jerryweber1768]

I just want a good cook and someone to change my diapers.

[@auntiemame7076]

How about a video on how men over 50 can stop being children and looking for someone to take care of them and grow up and act like real partners.

[@pm71241]

So ... I can answer that.. It's easy enough to find women with all kinds of interesting personality/interests. ... but it's really hard to find a woman arond 50 and above with a healthy libido. They exist... but ..

[@kenofken9458]

It's not that hard to find. The ones who still have a libido have one like a 17 year old dude! I have several and they run me into the ground sometimes.

[@frosty3693]

Great! Manni lost the stupid hat! Nice at that age women may not expect the men to change. Earlier in life women expect their men to change and work to that end. On the flip side younger men want the woman to stay the same but they change, so later in life expecting the people to be who they are and be stabile, at least emotionally, is great. And for men and women to have someone affirm them and give each other a point of reference is a good reason for a relationship. Is variety just comparative shopping, for rent or to buy? The problem with renting may be developing a tast for something you cannot afford. A question for women, and men, what do you bring to the table, what do you want to get? How much are you expected to give? Younger people, who may want to start a family and have kids, the math is different when those options are no longer part of the transaction for older people.

[@MelindaMabry-u2m]

Many still want young ark candy sadly

[@andrewbird57]

On the subject of being compatible, it seems the Golden Bachelor couple were anything but. Apparently Jerry, being retired, wanted to party (travel, have fun, enjoy life, etc) while Theresa wanted to continue working until she's 80. They had philosophical issues, apparently they had a big disagreement about a cornfield. Theresa saw opportunity for development, Jerry thought it should remain a farmer's field. I also read that Jerry was never serious about her, that he just wanted to be famous. Whatever.

[@2ndActTV]

That whole bachelor debacle is the PERFECT example of the importance of "compatibility". I was actually thinking of doing a segment on the "lessons from the Golden Bachelor divorce" with Sandy, she did a video on that topic, but I think by now everyone has heard enough. And yes, the whole thing was an overproduced mess. I find it impossible to believe that some people actually take is seriously ...

[@andrewbird57]

@@2ndActTV I think it would be a good convo to have, how not to look for love. How do you get to know somebody well over the course of weeks when the "contestant" is also dating a bunch of others on the show? It's insidious. Boomers should know better.

[@ginam.4990]

I'd be very interested on a conversation with that!

[@Over-for-now]

I'm 79 and l'm my 81 yr old husband's caretaker. He has to take 13 eye drops for his eyes. So we spend a lot of time on the bed giving him drops these days 😂😢😮

[@stephenjewitt9009]

I notice older women, and they look so bad, and I think they are still looking for finances for their lifestyle after being not very responsible with finances in some cases. The relationship is the bail out for them in retirement.

[@ElseMarie163]

Wow, sorry that's all you've met or experienced.

[@TheRedDevil_NC]

We don’t . Next topic

[@TheRedDevil_NC]

@@bryank.vaughan4316 men. Relationships

[@TheRedDevil_NC]

@@bryank.vaughan4316 how dumb are you bryan ? serious question. I am a dude. Read the question. my response was men over 50 dont want a relationship. Sorry it was too short hand for you to understand. Dating is not a relationship. Good grief man.

[@patricialavallee8286]

A nurse and a purse

[@chrisduhaime5689]

Expect back bone There needs to be some feelings / NO needle dicking No drama ma ma / not a bunch of so called friends always around. Constly on the phone with B.S. no stupid head games. In the last quarter with a 2 minute warning coming up the crap games that went on in first half don't work for the end days

[@Ggg496]

A nurse , that’s all they want

[@KarenTski]

We don’t care what old guys want

[@SJinspiration777]

❤

[@johnwilliams8353]

We want a much younger women 😂😂😂😂😂

[@stefanhartmann8985]

4 sure X gilf

[@SuperOdyss]

I dunno, as an older man I have really no interest in dating women over the age of 50. I see no advantage to it, she cannot offer me a family, she cannot help me develop my career and we cannot grow old together because I am already old. And you know she has so much baggage that she will not be fun. The reason it is so difficult for women over the age of 30 to date is because women are not supposed to be dating over the age of 30.

[@Tinrebel]

“Women are not supposed to be dating over the age of 30”!!!! That is one of the dumbest statements I have ever heard! You believe that? WOW!

[@Lisa-nr7er]

I don’t think you’ve experienced Iove yet.

[@martinsaunders7925]

To answer the thumbnail question in a flippant, trite way. A younger woman. To expand on it. A younger shèngnü.

[@richarddigglersem1298]

No I will not live with or marry her She must pay her own way No drama, must be happy within herself If she doesn't initiate intimacy she is out

[@shoshanaelishevalevy3838]

Wants free sex. lol very nice. At heady you’re honest.

[@Tinrebel]

Sounds like you’re looking for A I!

[@sverre371]

Dating a woman over 50, we men used to be married to those... demands like they are 28, but don't look at themselves in the mirror. Women are not like fine wine, more like vinegar at that point, men on the other hand... Older women get to compete with 35/40 years old, you better step it up ladies and change your old ways, men never do, even if you still think you can have them change, you should know that by now. It won't happen.

[@metafit123]

Is this a serious comment?

[@sverre371]

@@metafit123 Sure is, that's the truth whether you like it or not, reality, ever heard about it?

[@teresacroft7409]

NEWS FLASH buddy: you guys age, look older, and not nearly as good as you did in your 20's. You guys look ridiculous dating women your daughters or granddaughters ages. You have to pay for the younger ones (give them money, pay for their cars, rent, get them expensive presents). The younger women want your MONEY not you. Try treating the younger women like you treat the ones your own age and see how long that lasts you.

[@sverre371]

@@teresacroft7409 There you go, and you couldn't be more wrong, but it's all about looks for you, I can see that, and you missed the party? Value for money, old models with high mileage go cheap, and all the warning lamps are on. Go and buy a dog and leave us old guys alone. We have the time of our lives and decide the price, It does cost a little more to avoid the granny nagging every day. You didn't appreciate what you got back in the day, but now you regret it and want him back, he has moved on sweetheart, to better pastures.

[@teresacroft7409]

I don't regret anything like you think I do. I must have struck your fragile male ego nerve. I've lived my life just like I wanted to. Had lots of fun, make great money. We get tired of your bad habits and macho ways. So it goes both ways, you guys aren't perfect so stop pretending it's all bad women and innocent perfect good guys.