What Nice Guys dont understand

[@salvatorevitale138]

I've been saying for so long that if you want to succeed in this world you have to be selfish. It's true. You have to do what's best for you and what's in your best interest, it's the only way to get ahead in this world. And that applies to everything: Jobs, voting, dating, just your overall situation in life.

[@Dereksilver0]

💯 everyone comes to this realization sooner or later; better sooner

[@mintchevvv1834]

Bro threw in voting like he voted for Harris and is mad trump won 😂

[@abcwarrior91]

Disagreeing being selfish makes people dislike you. I know people who are selfish when they are successful and don't want to help anyone but want people's help and support when they hit rock bottom. That's like my ex boss he is selfish and greedy when his business is doing well and refuses by to give his employees a pay raise, instead forcing us to work more hours with no benefit causing people to quit. Then a few years later, after Covid hit, his business wasn't doing well and the staff shortage was taking a toll. He goes calling all his old employees to come help him run his business, but no one wants to help because he's a selfish person who just wants to use people for his benefit. Now his business is closed lol. I'm done with this rant lol this is just one example. Be nice but don't be weak everything has to have a balance.

[@user-ejxomyq]

Good luck getting ahead when people perceive you as a selfish human being

[@soldierofgod7412]

I wasn’t gonna comment but, your right man. My mother she has a golden heart all her life she was like “The Giving Tree” its a story look it up.. all she ever did was give give and give and she never got anything in return in fact people took advantage of her even more those who stole money from her got ahead in life while me and her just left behind broke asf.. that’s just the world we live in.

[@ModernDatingMastery]

*When a guy is too focused on pleasing others, he can come across as lacking confidence.*

[@taylorbee4010]

I feel this in the pit of my gut

[@raphaelalavi9385]

Well maybe it’s because I actually don’t have any confidence.

[@zakapholiac9377]

What a sad world we live in where being nice is seen as lacking confidence

[@JustMalcolm914]

Well i dont have much

[@SeFu2006]

@@zakapholiac9377it’s mental illness, nobody takes care of themselves so their brains are paranoid and look for things society says are attractive instead of thinking for themselves

[@mhaas281]

Be a leader, be desisive, don't be afraid to disagree with her, don't be a doormat.

[@JZGreengo]

I went from nice guy to being myself and that’s when she broke up with me so I feel like there’s a lot of nuance factors and being a nice guy isn’t always the reason they become distant, there’s more at play and at the end of the day just be you, don’t change for nobody. I’m staying nice, not gonna be like the men in my family, I’d rather be single lmao

[@Lil_jmp]

I’m a chill guy.

[@tinotendamandizvidza1903]

😂

[@josues0149]

Soy un tío tranquilo.

[@dr.peanutsheesh6176]

Si 😂 ​@@josues0149

[@LHR51]

@@josues0149no. Just no.

[@DariusExplains]

Nice Guy is usually code for not Good Looking enough. People keep making it about morality and behavior.

[@jdilla4591]

Naaaaaw, you 50 percent right but there all men who look like the chads ppl talk about and he can’t find a woman to be with, how you view yourself in your head is just as important as looks

[@Zentronex]

Women will also treat prettyboys like shit if those guys have no backbone to stand up for themselves.

[@randyg22152]

Ugly people usually become people pleasers eventually in order to buy love and affection. It’s hard to have firm boundaries and self-respect when everyone around you either ignores you or puts you down - unless you are useful to them. You learn to tie your value to being “useful”, so you get used.

[@DariusExplains]

@randyg22152 One of my friends who died recently was the living embodiment of this. He was fat, bald, broke, schizophrenic. He thought by feeding homeless people every week and being a Giver he would show people he had a good heart. He thought a good Christian woman would just see what a good heart he had, not care about how he looked. He died at 32, hit by a truck. He was a Giver in a World full of takers.

[@DariusExplains]

@jdilla4591 How you view yourself usually comes from how people treat you.

[@GrayFur]

If you treat her as a responsible and independent human being and let her be herself she will go to clubs, hang out with guy friends wich will lead her to think you are a pushover and lose respect for you. If you restrict her from doing what she wants, eventually she will feel she can't be herself in the relationship and leave I think modern women are just fantastic

[@JustMalcolm914]

Or or just not care about what she does

[@TheManWithoutAName1120]

Treat her as a capable independent being, if she betrays your trust then just leave.

[@SeFu2006]

That’s so funny they want to be autonomous but at the same time want a guy to be dominant of her and then still say they’re equal to men, hypocrisy and double standards everywhere I go, I have no sympathy for women

[@Bogosbinded]

@@TheManWithoutAName1120And do not forgive her. She will do it again!!! Leave her forever. Or maybe just break off contact

[@aleksandr_elkov]

Modern american* women are like that, no dignity, no human values, nothing…

[@steven1671]

Loving other people is considered horrible in this world. I refuse to play these games anymore. I’ll be myself and as loving as I want to be, nice guy stigma be damned.

[@GyobuTheDemonOniwa]

It's not so much about not being a mean person, but you have to stand up for yourself or people will say your a pushover or your "too nice".

[@jje7683]

Is he not standing up for himself by refusing to go with the ways of the world?

[@raincastmusic]

By all means, be loving, caring and kind to others But remember to do the same for you You gotta make sure you’re not constantly trying to be nice to everyone because then you’re forgetting who you are are (you aren’t meant to be compatible with everyone) Its the idea of not making your role all about pleasing others You gotta think about yourself too and stay true to yourself🙏🏼 But keep on being a good guy that will always be welcomed

[@1_rusteze]

this comment changed my perspective! i love your mindset, same here

[@TheOverlordEND]

This. People are too focused on keeping the image cold and confident that they don't realize when they're being unconsciously toxic. Such as shifting the blame on others when they are to be blamed, never apologizing when they are wrong, gaslighting, etc.

[@bayani7626]

be assertive and be ready to have enemies or people opposing you if you genuinely want to be happy in this world

[@prowthegamer]

^

[@maksfronczak9365]

I'm not really a nice guy. But I'm a passive guy... Gotta change

[@bigdollabill7426]

Facts

[@BiiskapsLV]

What makes you think you are passive? What are you not doing, what you should be doing?

[@The_gaming_guy-z7a]

yeah, im a nice guy and passive, but when i need to stand up to myself, I will, my friends come first above all else, but I can also be selfish, which is the main benefit of being spoiled as a kid.

[@chez0788]

That is 100% me. Passive. I just go with the flow. Women don't like it.

[@vectory674]

I'm currently working on this as well

[@Prime-ri5oe]

The first guy is literally me. I never seen someone word it so perfectly. I have such a hard time saying no.. Im working on it but man i need to learn to have discipline and put myself first. Thank you for this bro 🙏🏽

[@Nutz_Deez]

Same bro, just started breaking out of that mold recently. We'll make it

[@JTread2003]

Same man

[@SonOfSparda2024]

I can tell that at times I can be pleaser but only to my family because I have a fear of failing because I want to be the best I can be. I'm not really a people pleaser to other people because I don't want to please everyone to much work, energy, and not enough self time.

[@Mob-q1o]

Hey dude can I borrow 200 dubloons 😂

[@chatenkun9808]

😂🫵npc

[@jasherbelton3039]

I was trained from a young age to be a nice guy. Now I’m 18 years old Trying to the best I can to break out of that crusted shell. Tired of pleasing girls and others that could care less about me.

[@SonOfSparda2024]

To be honest with you I'm not nice to girls if they are not nice to me. Certain parts of an girl's attitude can easily make me dislike them regardless of how they look. I don't go out looking for drama nor toxicity. I may have a gentle heart but I'm not a pushover

[@SeFu2006]

You should please other because that’s what you like to do but if you don’t then don’t but be prepared to face the other side of the coin/emotional abuse that comes with it, hope you are strong enough for that. People treat me like shit and I think about after but do I notice it in the moment? Hell no I feel too good to let people make me feel another way

[@AC_WILDCARD]

​@@ACapedBaldymost apt description of the middle ground to find for one's self.

[@GUITARTIME2024]

You can get a polite person, as long as you look out for yourself and don't act too needy with women, too available, too dorky.

[@UselesstutoriaIs]

@@SonOfSparda2024 Exactly man same here

[@xXnazmanXx]

I was like this for a long time until I clicked that I was just being passive. I started showing more confidence and woman were interested in me even if our values didn’t align, that’s the next issue I had. Which sounds like a “nice” issue to have until you realise how much time you waste in the end. You need to learn to set boundaries no matter who it is. And be firm on those boundaries.

[@mario125ww]

How were passive? I'm curious because i might be passive in relationships. So what did you do to fix it

[@kwakaka]

​@@mario125ww бро, Я думаю что надо делать то что ты считаешь нужным, и говорить то что нужным. Быть уверенным в себе В ПЕРВУЮ ОЧЕРЕДЬ, любить себя тоже в первую очередь, и кажется все будет само собой, по крайней мере я тоже иду в этом пути, и это все мне помогает

[@jamiewatts333]

I'm more or less a 'nice guy' - and I've had countless intimate relationships with attractive and intelligent women. If a woman mocks or dismisses you for showing natural kindness and respect, she's probably toxic, shallow, and not worth your time in the first place. Yes, confidence is important, but some men don't understand the difference between being confident and behaving like an intense moron that makes women uncomfortable. It's about balance. If a woman isn't interested in you, respect her choice and move on.

[@scottreedy2054]

The first nice guy example described me perfectly. I always wanted no trouble from anyone I didn’t wanna make anyone angry and I want everyone to like me. I got the opposite instead and because of that I ended up alone in life and I’m almost 30 and I’ve been rejected by a lot of women. In the past year since I quit my addiction, my confidence has went way up. I am now starting to set boundaries towards others. I’m now starting to believe that I can do things that previously I couldn’t. I’m no longer letting anyone walk all over me. I cut off some people from my wife because I noticed how toxic they were to me. I knew I deserved better. Anyways, thank you for the video. I hope your message will speak to a lot of people.

[@DavidJackson-y4d]

Don't worry cause even Tupac got nailed with that "Too Nice" BS.

[@BlackBoyKingTV]

😂😂 facts! And Tom Brady too

[@NewHaven203]

@BlackBoyKingTV Tom Brady is a cheater

[@TheManWithoutAName1120]

You can still be nice, do not let your values be undermined. Guard them with a fist of iron.

[@tormeire2796]

my parents and locals taught me to be kind, turns out that will never find me love.

[@beric2173]

I’m really glad I came across you. At first I was gonna skip this video but im going through some weird situationship that’s now over. I realized even before finding this video I consider myself too nice. I’m generally just a generous person but I relate to almost everything you’ve said. And I hate it I know it’s not the way to go and now im barely finding my edge so I can seek some type of happiness in a relationship without second questioning myself if I am being too nice or something silly.

[@tonynelson2259]

Remember being single is better than being lied to, being used, or traded for worst. Love Yourself never lose yourself as that best friend. Yes you should be confident, not a obnoxious person that thinks they're better than everyone else. Always be kind but don't be too kind because it will hurt yourself in the end.

[@oppenheimer792]

As someone that read Dr. Glover’s “no more Mr nice guy” what I realized is that to men need to love themselves as who they are just as they are. If you’re a nice person, continue to be nice. A woman might like a “bad boy” but that is what she deems attractive. She’s just one woman that’s all it’s not a reflection of your capabilities. Most women I know who are in loving relationships are not with men who aren’t kind or aren’t nice. Only emotionally damaged woman seek men that are emotionally unavailable themselves. What Dr. Glover essentially says in his book, is that a nice guy is “codependent” meaning they put a girl on a pedestal and continually chase women even when being rejected. That is why, at the slightest moment that a woman doesn’t like you for who you are or stops trying to make the relationship work, you quickly change your attraction for her and go for someone that chooses you as you are. To men out there, there’s nothing wrong with being nice. A nice person is sociable and cares about others, but be direct in what you want. I genuinely believe that most nice men, aren’t nice because they want something in return, but because they’re genuinely nice. Lastly, the most important thing. “Nice guys” aren’t actually nice they label themselves as nice. That is, genuinely being nice is a good trait to have. As a guy that is around a lot of woman due to being in school, internship, and work (children’s center) that are all women dominated the most memorable woman I know are those that behave and do nice things for me. People really don’t realize just how great it feels for someone to just be nice and kind to others. It’s not the hot women, the over confident, or the women that is playful that is the most memorable, but the ones that are truly nice and do nice things for me that I remember the most. For example, I had a woman in my class give me an anime figure and another at my workplace bring a Starbucks drink unprompted. I’ll never forget these woman and would be with them romantically if they were available.

[@beerisgood760]

Yikes, dude you need to re-read that book or read others because you haven't learned anything. It's obvious you're surrounded by women because you actually sound like one. "Loving yourself as who you are," is something women say to avoid any accountability and self improvement. Find the things about yourself that suck and IMPROVE it. "I’ll never forget these woman and would be with them romantically if they were available." This is one of the saddest/ most pathetic things I've heard in a while. You have so few positive interactions with women that something so banal and mundane can leave such a lasting impression. You even admit that you would be with them if you could but THEY DON'T WANT YOU. For the love of god, please don't give people advice. You've learned nothing. You're still the same "nice guy" that both men and women despise.

[@gammaarmy9547]

I respect everyone and treat them with dignity simply because you are a human being. That goes with the so-called "nice" guys because I value them as good human beings. From this, the only reason when my relationships go wrong is because of someone else, I am never guilty. I withdraw all of my kindness and empathy from someone when they start taking advantage of me or my close friends. I label them as permanent "criminals" which I have zero tolerance for and see them as literal snakes (not humans). In the case of being ignored, I don't consider it as "criminal" action since that individual has free will with who they want to be friends with. Forgiveness is not an option when it comes to betrayal or trying to gain an edge me, I have self-worth. Anyone who is uncomfortable with my lack of mercy is a red flag. You wouldn't have to stress about getting buried by my hatred if you just walked away or valued me as a human being like everyone else, unless you treat me like a sub-human slave. Trust me, most "snakes" regret what they did to me.

[@Amurtigroiskra2021]

I agree with your comment.

[@plumaloy]

Think i agree, chose you're battles friend

[@DenshaOtoko2]

My parents tried to turn me into a beta male provider.

[@jacksonmanitoulinisland]

real....

[@Jungle_boy123]

😂😂

[@diztinger]

Ye I'd say too real. I remember back in the days just when I hit 19 I realized that my mother wasn't really as much of a good person as I thought she was.

[@empiricalscout4537]

This is an understatement, parents have been setting their children up for failure.

[@gooseisloose6908]

Parents always, ALWAYS try and make their own children into slaves because they need someone to take care of them when they themselves grow old, and weak. You can't make your own kids go against their own instincts if they ain't grown a spine. F that shi, go against the grain, no one else has your back cept you.

[@kowalskijan8237]

Thank You for this video. It helped me to clarify term and definition of a " nice guy" and differintiate between types of nice guys. I actually felt that there are certain types of this personality but now I know exactly what this subtypes might behave. Thank you

[@gabepano]

nice guy isn't just pretending to be a nice guy, he's grown to be an actual nice guy, and a good person in a bless of his heart ❤

[@toothinm9paste]

Yeah, until they abuse you, not worth it really.

[@boom_dad]

Honestly I feel like I relate to all 3 of these but at different phases of life. I started off at the first example, for awhile I was vengeful and finally I am at an identity crisis. Almost feels like this guy worded of the stages of people growing out from being passive. Quite excited for the final outcome. Currently working on setting my boundaries. However, being the passive pushover for a long time, people tend to indirectly challenge me when I decide to become more independant. I will overcome it. I understand how it all works now, got to accept it and become the best version of myself. 💪

[@lightorchestrator]

I'm a lifelong nice guy who is currently in the phase of being angry at the world, largely because my relationships not being where I want them to be. I feel like I've made progress. I've learned a lot to stand up for myself more, be selfish in a healthy way and speak up for what I want, namely in my relationships toward women. You're video probably should have mentioned that a lot of guys are nice guys because of parental issues. Usually behind a nice guys is an overbearing mothers with a warped view of men who teaches their sons to subordinate themselves to be easily controlled and a weak or simply absent father, who are both narcissists.

[@GUITARTIME2024]

You are making progress but the anger component needs to be channeled into just concentrating on people who want the best for you, who see your potential, who give helpful advice, while just ignoring anyone who doesn't want to see you succeed. Set standards.

[@elvisguerra]

Just be nice but keep working on your looks and skills. No one will abuse you if they know you can punch them in the face. You never know who can help you later.

[@D87943]

I’m 41 and I never had a girlfriend before and I feel my time is up when it comes to getting married and having kids especially the kids part.

[@justaguy6769]

just gotta look max, approach and you’ll be fine . You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take

[@avtomatkalashnikov4722]

@@justaguy6769 he's 41 its too late

[@johnd1635]

​@@justaguy6769he is going to get old soon its already over in his case, god have a mercy on his soul

[@justaguy6769]

@@johnd1635 i hear u but 41 ain’t that old, there’s still time to lock in, obviously it wont be as easy but it’s possible

[@heartache-v1x]

Work on yourself, gain some confidence and go out there. You still got plenty of time left. It’s not too late, it never is. If you’re in a situation like this, there’s definitely others in similar situations. You just need to go out and meet new people. Go on a dating app, go to the bar, a coffee shop or whatever. Find someone who loves you for you and go get yourself a family. It won’t be easy but you can do it. And you can always adopt and raise a kid. It’s never too late to give a child a loving home. I wish you the best. Good luck

[@JoeyGames123]

idk if am a nice guy, am just a chill guy

[@vojtechlansky86]

Im nice as a default, but few minutes are enough for me to dislike someone and not be nice to them anymore. I start to hate huge portion of people actually, but I always remember there are good exceptions and when it comes to strangers, i cannot guess who is who.. so i wont behave bad to people i dont know yet.

[@gammaarmy9547]

I agree with you. Every human being deserves respect and dignity, it shouldn't always be earned. Once someone crosses that boundary, it's necessary to shut them off

[@iananderson441]

This video is helpful, you are very articulate and are good with your words, i am a neodivirgent 29 year old autistic male who has been betrayed taken advantage of ans hurt by society, you define this very well i am the first one you said, i dont open up to people very much but thank you for this video, god bless you and take care.

[@itsawrapkevtino]

What a bot 😂 you trynna make us feel some type of way

[@chief8559]

I’m also autistic and subscribed to the neurotypical pill/blackpill because of this

[@chief8559]

@@itsawrapkevtinoNo lil bro he’s being genuine, gtfo lil bro

[@IcarusWhits]

TLDR: Used to be golden heart type; Not anymore because I've invested in myself (hobbies, likes/dislikes, how I act vs how I think I acted). Mindset and intention correlate to your actions. I wanted to be a person, and have fun being real version of me. That is how I grew out of the golden heart type. I was the golden hearted Nice guy. I'd risk my time for "friends", let people use me as a back up friend, and give my all for a "favor". It was only until the end of Freshman year of College that I realized that I needed to set boundaries, or rather I needed to be more selfish. So, as of the beginning of Sophomore year, I decided to be me. I've been setting schedules, doing daily self-work, and participating in my hobbies more. The biggest hurdle I had was diagnosing myself: "I didn't please others because I want to be liked, I wanted to please others to be confident in myself." In other words, I wanted validation, not security. After finding a solution (invest in me = confidence), I realized what *I* like, and what I find funny. I started laughing more, I realized It was okay to say you don't know and to have an opinion that IS WORTH SHARING. The biggest lesson I learned was mindset and intention. My mindset as of 12.11.2024 is "I just want to have fun, and be kind." Although flawed, I believe being kind is telling others what they need to know while not burning bridges. So, I tell them what personality traits I do NOT like. My intention is to be a good person, not a nice person. So, I laugh often to create a safe atmosphere, then communicate my dislikes. I fully acknowledge I'm not "nice", I hate certain things in people (in this case, distaste in certain female traits). Because of this, I've learned to walk away if that person doesn't give me something in return or partake in my likings. Now, I've never felt more free being alive (Coming from a used-to-be depressed loner). I still struggle with Validation, and sometimes I go crazy overthinking if I laughed too much or gave a negative impression. However, discovering your negatives, your own solutions, and your needs is important. In this case, step back and listen. I do NOT take that lightly (which is only my opinion based on my experience). I'd say i'm still golden hearted, but not ignorant. I still make sure everyone around me has a good time. But now, i'm very strict on who's favors I accept and who I keep around. It goes as far that I don't care if I have girls around me, I see people as people. However, One lesson that I wish I knew as that depressed loner, is that you need to play at your own level, and know who you are talking too. (Ex: In Vrchat, typically people looking for connection so I laugh a lot. If talking to my boss (who is secure), I laugh because I think something is funny, list what I'm interested in (advertise), and listen.)

[@danieljbruso]

I would say I fall into the third category. I enjoy being kind. What would Jesus do? He would love first… But he also flipped tables and whipped the Jews who were abusing the tabernacle. I must learn moderated assertion and confidence.

[@hunmapperbalazs]

This video just described my old self and a big phase from my life. Now I got a new meaning that "nice guy" exists, it wasn't just my own pattern of behavior

[@vectory674]

Definitely was on the first category for years. Around 2019, I started to understand I always put everyone before me. I wasn't happy and tend to do things because I wanted others to be happy. I started to develop boundaries and say no. It wasn't perfect because I still did it with some people. However I started to develop a backbone and stood for myself. My second wake up call is when my grampa died. When I realized my so called friend didn't care about my grief, I was really angry about it but never lashed out. I silently started to move away from those who tried to make me feel bad even when it was accidental. My final wake up call was... When I endured r*cism from my GF's "best friend". Because of this (but especially the second thing) I now am on the third category. I can be a asshole but I was so passive before that people walked on me. I always was able to stand up for myself because I'm naturally very stubborn when I get oushed somewhere I don't want to go but I never dared to be more assertive I have seriously a lot to reflect on and leaving something here helps me clear my thoughts

[@Dinoslay]

Here’s a question, if all I do is spend my time trying to make others happy when will I get to be happy? It should be a mutual exchange. It always isn’t. By all means, be fair to others for integrity’s sake. But also be fair to yourself and have some self-standards instead of allowing yourself to be used. For other words, don’t be nice all the time.

[@cinematicjoe5514]

Here is a tip that I learned late. I love helping others and giving. So having an edge and being a little more bad boy was to hard. What I did was focus my energy on the right people. Volunteer and help less fortunate, use that energy for good and it’s so much easier to say no to those who are taking advantage of you

[@Loi_of_Earth]

Funny, you said that nice guys who are hateful needed to get punched. Well, I was that dude back in grade 7 and 8, I was labeled a weirdo and pretentious. Wasn’t really likable and is deeply insecure. My God, the charisma on command and alpha m videos were making me a creep lol. When stuff didn’t pan out, I became angry and hurt people and at that those people’s friend beat me and I got humbled. I learned to be humble and intensely self-aware. I blamed myself for being immature. Though that self-awareness made me passive as hell, so then I had to form my idea of an individual back in grade 12. Well, I was still hateful but silent about it. Gradually, I was becoming better even after some failures but hopefully now I’ve become more social and my mindset has become more mature. I hope I could translate such maturity in my studies tho… currently in my second year ✌️

[@christiansnaturestudio6599]

Hmmm that first sentence sounds alarming to be honest. Punching someone would guarantee you in JAIL. Let’s not punch people unless you’re defending others or yourself

[@Loi_of_Earth]

@ Uhhmm, I said that because I was a nice guy who became irritated when things didn’t go his way. So, I was smacked out of it by a punch. I wouldn’t say violence is good as you’ve pointed but it is such a wakeup call for me to introspect and realize what’s wrong. This idea of being soft over things and saying that we shouldn’t do harm just because it is harmful… Is what the west is suffering from, this reluctance to police delusional worldviews is what’s making people like overrighteous people and hateful incels, if all the things they are doing brings no consequences then that leads to the decay of moral understanding. I hope you do understand that the world is not always the west. Yes, I highly detest violence against people but there’s a time and right way in doing so. As long as the message is broadcasted. But truly, I hate it when other people overgeneralizes the world in their own lens. It pisses me off, yes it will always exist but that is why we educate and support them at their lowest, guide them to true goodness, so that we avoid the circumstance of them becoming what they’ve experienced.

[@christiansnaturestudio6599]

@ even if it is well intentioned, being physical about it creates an unsafe environment even if the person is in the wrong. That’s why I hate abuse as a way to teach people to avoid mistakes. Coming from someone who is a abused as a child. If someone were to punch me in the face if I was in the wrong or if I make mistakes, I would speed dial the police department immediately.

[@HereGoesSomethin]

ngl bro i found your videos and i vibe with your videos and experiences. its helping me fisho. keep making these videos. you deserve way more subs.

[@Dereksilver0]

love 🙏🏽

[@bogdantoma3916]

I once helped a friend get the girl a had a huge crush on. It killed me seeing the two of them like that, yet I spoke with my boy day after day until he did the big moves. It brought me genuine happiness seeing them happy. 😢

[@GyobuTheDemonOniwa]

I dont know if you can lump types of nice guys all in different categories. My experience is being mistreated at home my whole life and not being able to stand up for myself with my peers or anyone really. I used to say it was because im too nice and now i dont think of myself as nice anymore because i havent done many nice things. But ive always been torn between wanting to be nice and wanting to be more dominant and assertive while not being hated by everyone. But i know you cant be liked by everyone no matter what you do.

[@marcob2137]

Being nice and being kind are two different things, but y'all ain't ready for that conversation 💅💅💅

[@tyronewalker5764]

I spent a lifetime being the nice/good guy, with nothing to show for it.😢

[@patrickkrueger2905]

1. Alot of people mistake kindness for being nice and those people aren't worth having around. The few people who get you are of far more value than having many people who don't. 2. Have a good understanding of who you are and what your morals and values are. Set your bondries around them. Dont expect having bondries to get you what you want but it will make you happier and more confident with your self. (If you don't know, do some soul searching. Get out, experience the world. Figure out what works for you and what doesnt.) 3. Don't care too much about what others think of you. Don't confuse that with giving yourself a bad reputation but, don't let others put you down when they clearly don't understand you nor will they ever try. It is what it is and there are 7.5 billion other people out there. Your odds of being liked are far greater than you think but having a negative headspace won't help you see that. 4. MOST IMPORTANTLY. Acting in ANY kind of way that isnt who you are with the expectation of getting lots of friends, money and, romantic partners are just another form of people pleasing... Read that again and let it sink in.

[@ArthurAstora]

Some genuine nice guys (like myself) become genuinely nice because of possible childhood trauma like abuse or child neglect which gives them depression. This causes them to see the world as a place where the people around them should always be happy. If they see someone sad or in a situation/problem, they'll feel like it's their fault and will do anything to fix the problem due to their higher sensitivity to emotions (mostly to other's emotions). They feel like the people around them should always be the right/correct person and main focus of their attention, causing the genuine nice guys to agree (even if they truly don't) or sacrifice their own time to join the other person. And as a result to all of this, they'll lower their own standards and become easier to walk all over and still not really care about it (cuz they'll think it's ok since they feel like they're doing the right thing even though it's hurting them).

[@evlx1240]

I think I've been all of these before but I'm starting to become someone who's truly confident in themselves with a purpose.

[@TheGamerLorian]

I definitely have been lacking confidence, but I only rely on other people to say if I'm "nice".

[@zabedibeig278]

If you’re above 8... your always cute

[@bobajett1025]

Someone call chris hanson

[@TopG_1111]

Yea but u can turn some girls off

[@mcmike5860]

@@bobajett1025he means attractive wise

[@prowthegamer]

@@bobajett1025 Will do

[@daltenheifner6250]

Many people might not agree but the best thing that worked for me was basically cut everyone out and be by yourself. Workout go to work and focus on reaching goals and not prioritizing your life around women is what will make you successful in the long run. It’ll establish identity and make your more selfish and makes it easier for people not to walk all over you

[@GUITARTIME2024]

Yep. Dont chase butterflies. Build the garden that attracts them.

[@splitzerx570]

“#1: don’t let others tell you what to do or think” - Guy who’s telling you what to do and what to think Nah but in all seriousness dude solid advice you are definitely right in a lot of points especially the passive guy, I was basically him in high school but I didn’t really care about any of this shit back then. I personally always think people need to stop trying to “fix” themselves and just start developing as a person. Just talk to people and test the waters and go to whatever calls to you.

[@isosoriharrison9556]

When you think too much with your feelings and less with rational thinking. You come off at a non respectable man and no one wants to be friends or let alone a gf of someone like that. I learned to stick to your boundaries and do not let others tell you who you are. Be respectful towards yourself and do not give more of yourself to those who do not deserve it. You can be a kind man but also someone who does not let people disrespect him. Being kind is 💯 different than being nice.

[@outsiderperhaps7834]

"Am I not supposed to have what I want? What I need?" - Peter Parker / Spider-man Either be single or rather be in a relationship, none should be stopping you from improving yourself every single day. We fellas all have our own values to be acknowledged and being nice was never an exception. C'mon guys, because at the end of the day, we gentlemen wouldn't want a gold digger or a bit** - those generally are red flags. On the other hand, girls who pick their partner poorly would face the same consquences if not worse. Be who you want to be, do what you think is right. Continue walking, or running, I hope you would find your number 1 soon or... at the very least be proud of how far you've gone. Have a good day.

[@hbups1123]

I'm definitely the second trait and I have done two martial arts, got punched in the face and guts and I still find a reason to blame other people for my misfortunes. I don't think a humbling experience would help at all. That is terrible advice. I personally have a rigid mindset due to previously having it easy and it is hard, not only for people like me but everyone to see things through a bigger lens because it's easy not to. Sometimes you need to sit down and shut your mind off for a bit and stay calm and stop imploding inwards. Being humbled would just make you find another reason to hate everyone and this is why a lot of people like me are timid and dislike socialising.

[@MrRomeo-v8s]

How did you come out out of it

[@HillVillageDragon]

Don’t be ‘nice’. ‘Nice’ has come to mean something transactional i.e. ‘if I do something nice for you, you ought to reciprocate and do something nice (sex) for me’. Rather, be kind. Kindness means doing the right thing BECAUSE it’s the right thing with zero regard for any kind of ‘benefits’. Furthermore, being kind has its shades. Sometimes, being kind means engaging in some tough love. You WILL at times have to say ‘no’ to people for various reasons. That includes being kind TO YOURSELF by saying no to others.

[@stevearai3361]

Sometimes, a type 1 nice guy could transition into type 2 due to abuse like family turmoil, bullying, etc. An innocent mindset could turn into a ticking bomb if he's not aware of the reality that people really don't have your best interest at heart.

[@RealityFactsCheck]

I have a testimony to give: I used to simp over this girl that meant the world to me. I don't know if it's her personality that changed, or maybe I actually figured out who she really was, but I assumed that she lost interest in me only because I was acting WAY too nice. I look back at my messages to her, and I actually overdid it. I regret this :(. I really do. Please help😭. Any advice would work. Thank you.

[@goomba0834]

Forgive yourself for all your mistakes, even the big ones. Don’t be hard on yourself, but don’t be conformist either. There’s always a chance to improve your skills, but keep in mind that you will start off ugly and make your way to being great, mistakes will be in the way, but it depends on you if even the tiniest mistake will bring you down. You can do it brother 💪

[@Violetcdo]

Been there man 🙇🏾‍♂️

[@levhen]

It's okay, i've been there when i was younger, instead of seeing your mistakes and bad choices as a negative look at them from a positive perspective, try to see what you can learn from it and how to stop yourself from over doing it. I hope this makes sense.

[@juantorres-fk7bk]

I am a nice guy because I am afraid of life, I am too sensitive, I am not strong enough to face the anger of others, I act nice because I don’t have it in me to be anything else, that’s all that my cowardice and fragility allows me to be, I am alive but I am not living, I do not build relationships because that would imply that I know how to live in the moment with another person, I do not do this because I do not know how to do this, I am someone who hides because who I really am is so pitiful it would make anyone feel repulsed. People can always tell especially women

[@A_Mika_appeared]

What's the difference between a nice guy and a chivalrious person. And is being chivalrious still worth it in the modern society of dating age.

[@jermainetaylor653]

The word "nice" doesn't have a clear definition. People have their preferences, and if you dont match them, it doesn't matter if you're nice or a jerk.

[@Remsterdam]

People pleasing is a coping mechanism. We like to think it's goal is to get what we want, or keep away what we don't want or because we want to give or receive love so much. But it's always connected to manipulation. To create another person to be in debt to you by establishing a superior morality from which they can award, reject or judge. This does not mean that a person like that is not genuine nice and feels fullfilled by helping others. They just have the wrong expectation from what it will get them in return. Just be aware that it never gives you a right to claim anything back, and others will see the difference.

[@Johnathan-mj4ei]

dude your real. this is gonna help me change. thanks

[@JustMalcolm914]

When i gain control of my emotions then ill think about it

[@nicholascammarano]

At this point, I think I’ll be content with being single forever. I’m 22 and I’ve experienced a lot of heartbreaks this year. Honestly I’m just going to focus on my career goals and mental health. I’ve been labeled as nice and sweet but if I can’t get a girlfriend then so be it. Besides, finding a genuine good girlfriend in this day and age is almost impossible.

[@MilaviZG]

Now I'm living in the timeline where love becomes difficult everyday life

[@tonynelson2259]

Learn to follow your Desires, What you Think, Speak, your perception on things, don't copy a girl's way just to try to impress her. Be Yourself. If You're not Married and just Dating understand there's no commitment involved because you never know how the other person feels, you may push that person away. I'm basically saying yes your partner has to have space that way they can be sure about what they want.

[@zLusso]

I’m the first type of nice guy, but I’ll never ever be a guy best friend lol. I refuse to be one of those

[@Yung_chopped]

Who's to say that and ounce of kindness is considered a pound of weakness. What is the expression of kindness.

[@MRNentertainment7122]

I'm a very energetic person and a legitimate nice guy who just wants everyone to be in a good mood so if a girl is having trouble, I want to be there for her. My first girlfriend admitted she had a crush on me and I was so happy and excited I was so in love until in February after always associating her with good feelings she went out of nowhere and cheated on me. Never before did she show such tendencies and it really got to me. But when we were done, though, she said that I was the best boyfriend she had which was the goal in the first place. Also when I learned she had a bad father I asked her if it was true and she was actually in a lot of pain but she didn't say no. Whether she was forced to or she was just okay I never figured out

[@Abdulyt-g5m]

Look man being an introvert doesn't mean that you're a nice guy as the matter of fact being highly extroverted makes you a people pleaser. I myself I am an introvert and sometimes people see as aloof and cold hearted person & I love that because I don't please anybody I do what think is right for me nothing else

[@nitroplayz2252]

I feel like I'm all 3 of them. Just a nice guy

[@Dee_Snutz]

4:03 one phrase you can say that will 10/10 piss people off everytime you say it is “I’m me and you’re you” people always want their thoughts and opinions, especially when voicing it to someone to matter. Especially if it has to do with their feelings- they always want them put first and this one phrase is the quickest way to stick it to them. People have to be reminded that we’re all individuals

[@alexandrevachon541]

Well, there is a thin line between being "nice" and being good.

[@fargo7018]

15 years later that same woman is a single mother cuz it just did not workout with Chad. Gave him her best and most passionate years and now wants Mr. nice. Nah I'm good I'll go for the younger women cuz I worked hard for it and deserve it.

[@ontisitsemanyeneng3154]

It's generally put in inverted commas to denote the opposite of what the word means. "Nice guys" are generally seen as nice enough to be around but not enought to form intimate relationships with. They generally have a low self-esteem and typically try to compensate for that by trying to buy external validation. That's the essence of being a "nice" guy. We've all been there at some point. We live and we learn, nonetheless 😂

[@vandamayhem3783]

NiCe GuYs JuSt wIn aT a LaTeR dAtE! Yea, after she’s been ran through with 300k miles

[@why8410]

Translation: Just be physically attractive.

[@ignaciorodriguezdiaz104]

just watch the entire video

[@why8410]

@@ignaciorodriguezdiaz104 Never seen a hot guy be called a nice guy tho 🤡. Only normies and sub 5 are called nice guys. Looks= personality.

[@PrekiFromPoland]

Or a ruthless, unhinged sociopath.

[@Slayer-Josh]

@why8410 normies need to be less nice and sub 5s need to stay in the basement

[@hokageofgaming]

@@cnxghost ur dumb

[@pillieee]

I'm cooked.

[@StefTechSurfer]

7:30 sounds a bit like me but I did have an ex for 4+ yrs. It was the nicest feeling being together. When we broke up I struggled a lot. Financially I've never been supported by family so my life has always been an uphill battle. 31yo and never had a car. Haven't travelled much but did visit a few countries here and there. Recently we took out 2 mortgages and she broke up :(

[@StefTechSurfer]

0:15 when those girls become your exes 💀💀💀

[@kennedyt6818]

Thank you for this video sir

[@Dereksilver0]

thank you as well sir

[@1_rusteze]

tbh, i'm the first type of nice guy. i'm a best friend of this one girl who has clearly stated that we aren't gonna be together in the future & yet I do everything i can to please her. i bunk my lectures for days to stay with her, i give her chocolates, i write her letters, give her flowers and positive affirmations. but lately i've been feeling that this might make it seem as i'm too available and she might already have lost interest in me and now she's just using me for the services i provide.. idk what to do chat

[@gwooveee6200]

Hey man, just reading your story and as much as you like her it’s clear that she isn’t worth your time and devotion. You should never have to feel anxious or worried for being “too available” if she likes you as well. Rather you should choose to create distance and move on, if she’s just using you for services you provide she isn’t worth it as a love interest or even a friend. Maybe block her for the better sake of your mental health. Go outside, find new hobbies to explore and go out and meet new people, as long as you can find yourself to be busy, eventually someone else will notice your efforts. You’ll know when someone else finds interest in you, don’t settle for less. Communicate on what you want in a relationship with others before you start one, find someone who matches with what you want. You deserve much more than being used. Hope this helps if you read it.

[@BibleTumper]

I'm a stay to myself guy.

[@reggielee2235]

Amazing video, all factual. Second "nice guy” describes the average incel

[@prowthegamer]

A lot of points in this video is not just for girls which don’t do these things because you want girls, use this advice as a way to build yourself and eventually, girls will come in. Self love is so important and sometimes, you have to be selfish. Because as much as the people you love are important, you are also important. Being nice like he said isn’t wrong, just don’t expect anything when doing them and know when to step your foot down and not let ANYONE walk all over you. Also go to the gym, it’s so worth it.

[@SanicTheHegeh0g001]

Can i be honest with y'all? I'm a nice guy (a good person to say the least) and i don't give a fuck about this shit everyone says. "Nice guys are assholes." "Nice guys are bad." I don't give a fuck. I act the way i want. I honestly don't give a living shit about what society thinks about me. I would rather be single than being someone i'm not. I want to put a REAL smile on my face, not a fake one. Since women nowadays are the worst when it comes to relationships, i choose to be single. Not that i need to have one. And also, i know this comment will be ignored by all of you. But at least, you got to know my opinion

[@urielskelton117]

Love your honesty man, you seem nice but stand up for yourself and are an honest person which is pretty admirable. You keep it real.

[@SanicTheHegeh0g001]

@urielskelton117 fr bro

[@vekomaboomerang4094]

There are some girls want to date guys who do what they want and play by their own rules. Nice Guy won't doing anything, out of fear of breaking the law. Nice Guy will try to act a badass in order to get his crush's attention, but he will just end up making a fool out of himself and the girl will continue to see him as nothing more then good man. A few years pass by, and Nice/Bad girl decides to take a change on Nice Guy, the person whom she ignored and paid no attention to, because she was caught up in her own little world. However, Nice Guy has a successful career and is living the best life. Love will find Nice Guys when they least expect it. In reality, Nice Guys never really do finish last, they are just ahead in the crazy game that we call life.

[@_____thoughts8772]

Don’t let the world change you kings. Be yourself always.

[@SergioFernandez-cj4mt]

Great video… there are different types of ‘nice’ guys … having set boundaries and the ability to detach is what separates the ones that get taken advantage of vs the ones that don’t

[@NicaleATifa]

My brother 35 is an introvert bad boy who display sociopathic behavior…Don’t follow society rules, can’t hold a job, unemployed, impulsive, don’t care attitude, illegal activities, mysterious, lack of empathy, incapable of love. Women stare at him like crazy, some of them give bedroom eyes but they don’t approach him because he is intimidating, look serious and cold at the same time. Go figure it out how women brain works what they crave for. He is skinny guy too…It’s not about the money at all. If women like what they see they will find you attractive no matter what.

[@gamer_sohanyt]

Wow this world is so complicated We are tought from small ages that we should be good and nice in front of others so they could treat us the same way but no as you grow up you find these are totally opposite What in a world we are living when we get hatred we get ignored for just having a good heart and a good nature 😢 The most important thing I learnt is that we should always prioritize us first and then only should prioritize others and now I know this is the bitter truth of how this world works

[@ShankyJr]

wise words brother :) thanks for open conversations!

[@chrisrw453]

Hard for me to have an edge I've noticed....

[@nathanscharf5116]

Low key it’s fun saying no to people

[@Raikage65]

to all the „nice guys“ out there, you will find the one for you don‘t give up and stay true to yourself it will get better 🤞🏾

[@_shu5918]

I kind of fall under the third category, but I know why girls aren't interested in me, I'm somewhat ugly and that's fine. Also most of times when I had crushes, I never showed any interest or said something. I rarely talked to girls in my class and was an shy, introverted awkward teen.

[@Steve-n9g7i]

I had to run for my life and my sanity. I spent 7 years and thousands of dollars on a person who hated me.

[@DenshaOtoko2]

It works in Japanese dating.

[@jerryc5743]

0:44 - Rollo T. called that a BP’ed alpha, the Captain America type…strong but the nice guy.

[@SorxThroat]

needed this thank you.

[@underthehood6206]

If you are generally a nice person and do good to society then it shouldn’t matter if you get nothing in return. You give money to the homeless not recording yourself doing a good deed to look like a good person but to actually be a good person. Many people think that if they do the right thing they will get rewarded for it which is not only a problem for the fake nice guys.