What no one tells you about making friends in Italy

[@MsBritaly]

What has your experience of friendship been like? Comment below and let me know! By the way, just to clarify, when I reference technology that is not available here in Italy, I'm relating it to my experiences using various software for my content creation. A lot of the reasons stem from the strict privacy laws here in Europe. Also for example, in London the train stations are cleaned by robots - I don't know when that kind of thing will ever come to South Italy especially! I know, not friendship related, but some of you were curious!

[@MarcoMenozziPro]

Being friendly and helping others, for an Italian, is just an education that is taught from the earliest years of life. Being a friend is a very different thing. Understanding the difference is important. Real friends are often unfriendly people.

[@MsBritaly]

Thank you for the insights!

[@marty890]

Yes, and most of the people I know are more polite with acquaintances than with close friends. Making personal remarks and joking about personal matters with someone means you have unlocked a higher level of friendship with them.

[@antoniotorcoli5740]

It depends on what kind of friendship one is looking for. Finding " friends" to occasionally hang out or drink an aperitivo is extremely easy in Italy. Having true friends is difficult because friendship in Italy comes with a price: a true friend does'nt need to call you if he/ she wants to visit you. He / She just comes to your place. If he/she comes at lunch of course you will have a lunch toghether. If he/she calls you in the middle of the night and asks you to come you just go, whitout even asking any questions. If your friend needs a roof you will be more than glad to share your home with him/ her as long as it will be necessary. Of course you are entitled to the same treatment by your friends. I lived abroad in several countries since 35 years and , so far, I have found the same kind of friendship we have in Italy only in Greece. In some european countries ( I will not name them) if you wants to take a coffee at your friend's place, you have to plan it 2 weeks in advance . In Italy friendship is extremely precious. Therefore it is rare.

[@UTJK.]

Exactly. In Italy, true friends are more like brothers and sisters.

[@jasperchance3382]

As an Italian who grew up in GB I do have a lot to say about this interesting topic, but I'll avoid being lengthy. I'll just say that Italy is one of the most misunderstood or wrongly narrated countries I can think of. It's very different North to south, to begin with and very different also in social class levels. On friendship I'll say that it's something that just happens. One does not choose friends, one just meets them and friendship happens because of some sort of sympathy and that will make it real, not the fact that you have known each other for ages, although that can mean something, obviously and it may forge a true friendship if there is more than the shared origin to it.

[@MsBritaly]

Thank you for your insights!

[@nicolettatemporin1906]

I do agree 100%. Real friendship just happens and it is a real gift. Then you can meet a lot of people and get on well with them (at school or at work etc) but friendship it something deeper and different...

[@peggyclio1199]

Yes....

[@mariecurie7491]

I have lived in Siracusa for almost 7 years. I already spoke fluent Italian, and knew some people. At first I behaved like I used to in the UK, inviting friendly acquaintances for meals, for drinks, in the courtyard of my rented flat. They were happy to come but did not reciprocate. I learned that people here socialise outside their homes: let's have a coffee, let's have an aperitivo. Then the madness of 2020-2022 ruined social life. If the measure of friendship is, someone you can call for help if you or your cat is sick: I have two or maybe three. Those who hold my keys

[@36flamingo63]

mmm... remember that the Sicilian, ultimately, is certainly not the stereotype of the "Italian" (that NOT exists). Beyond the differences between people, between characters, the Mentality is very influential in these areas of the South: yes, at first glance they are friendly, well-disposed, "open", but in the end and in general the cognition is that of a closed group , provincial, dialectal, and here, even a bit of an arabesque style... It is for this than many Southern italians - now Young Peoples, more modern - emigrates. After all, the mafias were born, grew up and started from Southern Italy.

[@tallyskalynkafeldens1753]

I am brazilian and I came to Italy 2 months ago. I arrived already speaking an intermediate level of Italian and being able to have a conversation. This has helped me a lot, and Italians are super generous when they realize you are putting some effort trying to speak their language. I also realized that the ability to migrate from hang-out friends to real friends or developing deep connections is not defined by culture, but defined by matching. I met a lot of people, but I could only connect a bit more deeply with few ones. And I think this is because I matched better with them than with others, I had more things in common with some than with others, and this is normal.

[@MsBritaly]

Thank you for sharing your insights!

[@iguano72]

The real problem is that foreigners who move to Italy (especially the British and Americans) have a stereotyped and romanticized idea of our country. The truth is that there are both positive and negative aspects, just like in any other place in the world. There is no real paradise on earth; it all depends on what we're looking for: a village in Val D'Orcia can be breathtakingly beautiful, but also incredibly boring. I live in Rome (I'm Italian) and I feed off beauty and chaos, and every day the balance tips towards wanting to stay... but nothing stops me from changing my mind tomorrow. Anyway, I agree with everything you wrote, and you're right to warn others so as not to create the Emily in Paris...or Salerno" effect :-)

[@nicky29031977]

I've been living in Italy for 25 years and can assure you that friendships here are not strictly the same throughout your life. There are people here who have changed friendship groups during their lives and their friends in school are no longer around and they've changed plenty of different social circles well into middle age.

[@fabianpatrizio2865]

My late mother (Irish-Australian) lived in Italy for 15 years (1960s ~ 70s) and met my father (Sicilian).....we then moved back to Australia after but her friendships there never changed...even after 40-plus years going back to Italy occasionally for holidays....like she'd never left (and these were deep connections through work, family etc etc.... not just acquaintances) 🙂 what helped her a lot though, was she had a musical ear (she was a musician) and natural language ability, so she spoke perfect Italian after the first year or so......that was her experience.....In my case, I lived and worked in Japan for 5 years....the ex-pat thing there is big...you tend to stick together (Brits, Americans, Australians etc..) the 'Japanese' are outside all this in the main, for many reasons...PS - here in Australia, immigrants often say they have no "Aussie" friends...so it's not just Italy...it's hard everywhere to make local friends...it just is :)

[@MsBritaly]

Thank you for the insights!

[@marrlena947]

Be friendly, get involved in community events. Stop 'trying to make friends'. I am busy helping animals, going to classes, gardening, going on group hikes and working out in the gym. I'm friendly with dozens of people. That's enough for me. I live in Spain which is similar to Italy in many ways. I see dozens of videos about 'making friends'. I live in a town of only 2,000. I think people need to learn how to be their own best friend.

[@MsBritaly]

Being your own best friend is really where it all begins. Thank you for sharing your insights!

[@tic-tacdrin-drinn1505]

Yes, this obsession with “making friends” from the moment someone arrives at a place seems to be almost an epidemic.

[@Vale17594]

Trust me, making friends in Italy is difficult even if you are born there. I'm so sorry to hear that you had such an hard time adjusting to the life here

[@MsBritaly]

Thank you!

[@vale5189]

I'm a 45 year old Italian guy and I can't make friends anymore, and worst of all I'm losing the few old friends I have...maybe I'm a bear but now I'm accustomed to be alone. I envy children for the candor they have, they play with literally everybody and are so happy. I wish I have a time machine and go back in time when I was 5.

[@sasa_dcf]

im not italian but i think the same.making friends nowadays is difficult, you can gey along well but a real friend..not so common

[@lucalambertini9990]

You described the experience of any expat in probably any country (at least in the western world). I’m Italian and I’ve been living in the US for the past 18 years. My partner is American and the difficulties in relating to others are the same here. Your thoughts are, more at large, part of the human experiment of mixing cultures. Overall, this is the future. As people move way more than in the past, these situations will become more and more common. We are the guinea pigs of the future. If we keep connecting, we’ll ultimately overcome our differences and hopefully learn how to all live together and care about each other.

[@frankalfano1409]

I made some friends near salerno. Took a bit because yeah they want to be able to trust you. So people will observe you for a while before opening up. Italians are good at reading people's behavior. If your good you will meet good people.

[@MsBritaly]

Thank you for the insights!

[@soniaemmanouilidou1139]

Friendships need work to be sustained and they get more difficult as you get older

[@MsBritaly]

Yes - I agree with this!

[@mattonthemoon225]

I'm italian and I have to say that in general we italians are snob. That's the reason why a lot of foreigners struggle making friends in Italy. Italians are very selective and wary. In the south they tend to be more welcoming (only apparently), in the north they tend to judge you before even talkin.

[@databen7194]

over 4 years of experience here in Milan and 100% agree with these points on friendship, and I imagine the challenge is even harder in Salerno! It took me a while to realise many people I thought were close friends here were simply very sociable in an Italian way and what I thought were friends were just acquaintances that converse a lot. There is a lot of beauty in the life long friendships here though and I find it amazing how they can stick together through highs and lows for decades, it is rare I hear of anyone losing a friendship here while back in the UK I saw it often.

[@MsBritaly]

Absolutely!

[@danielefabbro822]

A friend is the guy that when he hears you have problems comes to give you a hand. We're all good at talking, but a friend is a guy that is there when you need it.

[@Clodovicus]

You know, I, an Italian, have heard this phrase more than once in Italy: "If you find an English friend, you find a friend for life." and it's very nice for us. Maybe it's just a different mentality, in which English people need more stability. As if an interruption or thinning out means the end or poor quality. In Italy, on the other hand, you realize the quality of a bond, a relationship, a feeling, even when you meet or call each other after years and you realize that nothing has changed even if everything has changed. But in general it is true that we Italians are more open than English speakers in general. So I realize that it can be difficult for you to decipher certain things, because our friendships are based on personal confidences, and what for us is a common dialogue, can seem to others something very personal, perhaps. However, you should know that even Italians abroad often feel dissatisfied in building friendships. The real linguistic and cultural barrier is this, it is not in reading a book or similar things...

[@gaia7240]

I'm 26 Italian and even school here is made in a way that force us to loose friends every couple of years

[@scottreburn7973]

Wow in the last few years i have made many friends in Campania and Calabria I find the people are genuinely very friendly and helpful i Have been to weddings and communions name days and birthdays and everything in between i find the people extremely friendly ❤😊

[@MsBritaly]

I’m so happy!

[@gaia7240]

That can still be the facade be careful

[@deannaolivieri1791]

it's not like that in every town in Campania. I spent four years in a terribly unfriendly place right outside of naples. I am fluent in Italian but single women have a harder time! I moved to Napoli and its wonderful, I have too many friends now. It is all about location. also couples and men have an easier time than single women. also families are seen as more permanent and make friends easily

[@christinewaterman7883]

I think that here in Italy the family is so important that they don't need real friends. I'm English and have lived here for more than forty years. My husband is Italian and my children are a mixture. I have many acquaintances, I have rarely been invited into anyone's home, despite the fact that they have frequently eaten at mine. Thats the way it is and I have learnt to live with it. This Christmas I have an old friend coming over from Ireland., we have been good friends, on and off, for sixty three years. Now thats friendship!!!!

[@nilofurlan1199]

I am not young and my experience is that deep friendships are not to be sought but are born through compatibility, empathy and more. For twenty years my wife and I have been friends with parents who had their child in nursery school with our son, why haven't we had a friendship like this with other parents? Sono italiano

[@MsBritaly]

It’s a good question. Thank you for your insights!

[@lmusima3275]

I know a lot about having Italian friends since I have many. As for romantic relationships, my ex boyfriend was actually Greek 🇬🇷 which was so different. Yes being in Italy as a regular traveller, being acquainted with the language and having friends it’s not the dolce vita that is presented to us

[@MsBritaly]

Yes, it’s important to be real about the experiences here for sure!

[@onenation9510]

I love the informality of Italian people and the way they speak their mind instead of the complexity of English people. Humanism originated in Italy and for a country that is surrounded by beautiful buildings the personality of the people can't all be ugly!!...I think it's about how your personality connects with the Italian consciousness. English people are very conservative and generally formal. When was last in Italy I was invited to lunch by strangers offered good advice when I was confused and appreciated when I had different opinions about certain things! if you know a little about sport, art, fashion or food there is always something to use to connect with Italian people just don't take yourself too seriously!!

[@cuginoeddie8677]

For me it was really easy. Aside from when I visited my family town and met friends of my cousins there, I’m a Juventus supporter. I got in touch with a fan group there and made many friends all over Italy and other parts of that world because of that. Each time I go back there from the USA to visit I make even more friends at match events.

[@Artemisi4]

I'm Italian and I still don't know my boyfriend's friends very well (they've been knowing each other for more than 10 years). I almost always feel like you've described! It's just that it is so difficult to feel part of a group that is already so strong. I do prefer one-one friendships, since entering such big groups can often make you feel excluded. All of my best friends come from different countries 😂 I guess it's for a reason

[@roccosalvatore-wy1ns]

I always appreciate your thoughtful and honest videos. Thank you! And thank you for your non sugar coated observations. Please keep doing it. Rocco

[@lmusima3275]

I met many of my Italian friends in London, the ones who live here and those that visited from Italy

[@MsBritaly]

That’s lovely!

[@giuseppecappelluti3626]

14:36 I agree. In Italy it’s like this (especially in the South) because we know the people you can actually trust are not many.

[@nicolabii]

I think it’s hard even for us. I grew up in Rome, but my parents had a small apartment in Torvaianica. I’d spend three months there every summer, playing soccer on the beach with other kids and hanging out in the evenings. It was easier to make friends back then because we were kids and loved soccer. Unfortunately, I don’t talk to any of them anymore. I follow a couple on Instagram, but once we turned 19 or 20 and got jobs, we stopped meeting. Sometimes it feels like it’s not even about the language

[@Clodovicus]

First of all, we should focus on the term friendship and its meaning. In Italy, friendship, in the strict sense of the term, is something profound that arises from deep dialogues and comparisons. It can last a lifetime or just a phase, but it is always intended as something profound. I know Italians who have left other countries (especially the USA) because they didn't meet anyone who could establish this emotional connection with them based on introspective ability. Everything remained at a superficial level. The rest here in Italy is called "conoscenze" and includes all the various nuances you mentioned.

[@gaia7240]

I'm sorry but it's the contrary, I italin too and we call everyone a friend even if we spoke 2 times in total, for us it doesn't have deep value

[@rv706]

"If you've up leveled... yet your friends are like bums sitting around not doing very much" - That was an *incredibly* condescending thought!

[@MsBritaly]

As this is only a part of what I said, I feel we need to remember the context. We are naturally influenced by the company that we keep. If you are working hard on yourself and on improving your life and you are surrounded by people who have no such desire - friends or otherwise - as hard as it may be to accept, that will rub off on you. So yes - the part of the sentence you quoted may seem ‘condescending’ but let’s not forget the rest of the sentence and the actual context it was spoken in.

[@lucianeedgington9421]

I absolutely love your videos

[@MsBritaly]

Ah thank you!

[@SmallTownItaly]

Interesting enough I really struggle having friends here in the USA (south FL) where we’ve been since 2015. In Italy, I’ve grown fond of the community and have really hit it off with another couple of expats.

[@MsBritaly]

Yes, it's interesting how everyone has such varied experiences.

[@marcosturla8716]

I think is correct. Maybe easyer in central and north italy, because the economical situation is better. But maybe people is more closed, or reserved. You have to take the best italy can offer , hiking, groups for activities ( sport travelling drink and food culture) . Generslly to meet people we go to an association with same interest, ( nature soort cukture and so on), and friendship comes, meeting people with same interests in free time

[@irenemacginley6022]

I've been living in the north of Italy for over 30 years. I have more "aquaintances" than friends. As per another comment, many refuse invitations as they feel obliged to have to re-invite, their thoughts, def not mine..!! In UK you can ask a friend for tea/coffee but many answers I've received here in the past : "I don't have time/have to go to the supermarket/have to go to my mum......etc etc.....😅

[@timothyeadie7239]

Thank you for sharing your experiences. It matches up to my own in Sardinia. Everything that you've said touches upon what I've felt in the last 7 years. It's even harder to convey these to my wife or people who have lived here their whole life.

[@MsBritaly]

Yes - I think although everyone’s experience can be different, often there are some shared similarities.

[@tarachoo5129]

I have been living in Sardinia for nearly 3 years and I can relate with some of the experiences shared in the video. I guess I'm not all alone in this situation too :)

[@Ingulf_The_Mad]

If they are true friends, very rare, it is because they know your core. As you know theirs. This means that only really serious events in life can impact your friendship. Very serious events. This is because your core must not change. If this happens it is because before you were lying to yourself and others, as in life you only change to become what you have always been. File, smooth, polish, improve. But do not change.

[@MsBritaly]

Thank you for your insights! I do think though that with any sort of adaptation, there is a degree of change. I don’t believe that we have to stay a certain way forever because that is who we are.

[@estbestest4656]

Guarda che io sono cresciuto in un paese ed ambiente molto più povero rispetto all'Italia. Nonostante tutto ho sempre lavorato, avuto amici e viaggiato un sacco. Perciò ho la mente più aperta. Un povero palermitano come fa a viaggiare di meno o essere più povero di un moldavo ad esempio? A Palermo ci sono i voli da 10 euro e un sacco di gente che vive con i genitori senza mai uscire dall'isola. Mi dice qualcosa che saranno poveri, ma non al punto da non potersi permettere un weekend a con i voli lowcost in qualche ostello a Budapest. Ci vogliono 70 euro che spendono per le sigarette in una settimana. O forse sono poveri di mente? Ho sempre avuto un sacco di amici, sempre viaggiato molto, ma da quando mi sono trasferito in una piccola città al sud 3 anni fa, non ho più amici. Li ho davvero cercati in tutti i modi, addirittura sono arivato al punto di offrire le bibite al bar per parlare con qualcuno e stabilire un contatto, ma zero, non funziona. È inutile, capisco che tu possa aver paura di dire tutta la verità nel video, ma io no dato che non ho un canale a cui badare. Ora non fraintendetemi, la gente è simpatica, se li trovi in un bar ti parlano, abbracciano, scherzano, ma non sono amici miei inquanto nessuno mi ha mai chiamato o scritto un messaggio. E io non voglio umiliarmi fino al punto di scrivere sempre per primo. Tre, quattro volte e basta. A un certo punto ho trovato anche gli stranieri simpatici, che hanno avuto lo stesso problema. Pensavo, magari italiani mi schifano per la mia provenienza, ma no, schifano anche i tizi inglesi che ho conosciuto, non li vogliono manco per praticare l'inglese, tanto non lo praticano. Però se devono parlarmi di quanto sino più fighi, aperti, simpatici, sorridenti degli altri, allora lo fanno con un immenso piacere. Simpatici e sorridenti un corno, purtroppo, per la maggior parte è l'unica cosa che sanno dire, dopodiché si stanno zitti o non sanno più che dire. Anche se hai soldi, fai una vita decente, parli la loro lingua meglio di chiunque altro, non ti accettano, la verità è questa. A dirla tutta non credo sia il razzismo, non sono ne cattivi, ne severi, è semplicemente ignoranza e chiusura mentale. C'è anche da dire che la gente proveniente dalle grandi città è completamente diversa, io invece sto parlando di una piccola realtà. Ho conosciuto un amico italiano che mi ha scritto e chiamato, proponendomi di uscire per davvero, peccato che se n'è tornato nella sua città grande e lontana. Alla fine dei conti non vale neanche la pena provarci, tanto dopo tutti i viaggi e esperienze che hai fatto, a un certo punto ti rendi conto di essere tagliato diversamente e di non aver nulla a che fare con la gente conosciuta in un bar. Detto ciò, non mi dispiacerebbe avere un paio di amici per uscire e farmi 2 passi almeno una volta al mese, ma mi arrangio anche così. Ho vissuto in altri posti ed è sempre stato più facile stabilire un contatto umano. Soprattutto nei paesi dove vive la gente che loro considerano fredda e poco simpatica (Polonia, Germania, Paesi Bassi). Per sbilanciare, ci sono tanti tratti di cui un italiano medio è dotato che mi piacciono per davvero e ametto che sono fatti meglio degli altri (hanno stile, accettato critica in modo costruttivo, lavorano sodo, beh, almeno dove vivo io, hanno un senso dell'umorismo, sanno cucinare, sanno arrangiarsi, sanno dare i consigli), ma non li definirei donnaioli e amichevoli, in quanto da qual che vedi la maggior parte di loro sposano la tizia conosciuta alle superiori e ha hanno pochi amici Grazie per il video.

[@MsBritaly]

Grazie per aver condiviso le tue esperienze. Dirò una cosa: purtroppo non è più così economico viaggiare dalla Sicilia come una volta. Le differenze culturali plasmano assolutamente le nostre esperienze.

[@gabrielenanni9273]

As an italian living near Milan I can confirm: there's NO romanticism in friendship in Italy. You could find here maybe the best person to share a deep boundary, based on trust and mutual respect (and I did) as well as people ready to use you "just in case" or simply that want to share with you only a superficial relation based on silly things (and I did). And it's ok: it is the world that goes this way. Italy just follows.

[@MsBritaly]

Thank you for your insights!

[@jody.wanderlust]

Hi!! Well, by nature, Intend to lean on the introvert side, not recluse though! I have seasons of acquaintances, maybe 1 or 2 would I call “friend”. I most certainly do not have anyone I’ve been friends with since childhood. That’s the short version! :)

[@MsBritaly]

I think this highlights how varied everyone’s experiences surrounding friendship can be.

[@flavia-s1f]

I can totally understand you. Although opposite, this is very relatable to my eperience as an Italian who lived in the UK for 6 years. When in England, I made some friends and established connections (which without surprise took a long-time), while nourishing the long-distance relationships with my childhood friends also through several annual visits to Italy. At first the cultural shock IT>UK was intense as I was feeling out of most conversations due to my limited understanding of English language and I was severly missing 'my people'. When I moved back to Italy tho, I realised exactly what you're saying: my friends here and the people in general, don't actually have had the same amount of experiences I gained during my 7 years abroad (I also spent 1 year in Australia) so conversations and activities to share are limited and not varied. For me this limiting both friendships and personal development and - despite all these people around - I can feel lonely at times. I really admire what you're sharing. Definitely no one talks enough about navigating friendships when you move abroad. Thank you for the honest insights!

[@johnmaggiorino4493]

Well I'm here in NE Anglia is supposed to be very friendly...yet 3 times I've been told,go back where u come from .From the locals ,sorry forgot....I'm Italo SudAfricano

[@arslongavitabrevis5136]

What do you mean by Italo-Sudafricano? Are you an Italian who was born and bred in South Africa?

[@MsBritaly]

I’m so sorry that you’ve had to experience that. Unfortunately closed minds exist everywhere.

[@johnmaggiorino4493]

@@MsBritaly True 👍

[@handeinwonderland]

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 wonderful points Claire. I couldn’t agree more!

[@MsBritaly]

Thank you!

[@leemortaccy8133]

I came to Parma in my teens about 36 years ago and it was really difficult , if not impossible to find company back then , mainly due to the "Clique" mentality which was widespread. Furthermore , once you did find a group, you were kind of subjected to some sort of Hazing , perhaps to test your character , or to see if i was worth their time . Of course, being a bit of a rebel, i never had time for such nonsense . Fortunately things got better with time.

[@amerigorosso8099]

I italian and I don't have friends, I don't event think how much is difficult to make friends if you're a foreigner

[@frankpanetta1596]

Interesting information. Thanks for sharing.

[@MsBritaly]

Thank you!

[@mrkite89]

Da quello che dici temo che tu ti sia trasferita in Italia per le ragioni sbagliate. Non fraintendermi, da italiano conosco bene i limiti di questo Paese, ma sembra che tu abbia un pò frainteso il "modo di vivere" italiano quando hai deciso di trasferirti. Comprensibilmente, dato che non ci eri mai stata. Ma ora, che vivi in Italia da molto tempo, ti sarai accorta anche di quanto cambia la mentalità spostandosi in giro per il Paese: Nord, Centro e Sud, periferia e città, mare e montagna...L'Italia è in realtà un Paese dalle mille facce contenuto in uno spazio relativamente ristretto.

[@MsBritaly]

Posso dire che allora non capivo lo stile di vita italiano come lo capisco adesso. Questa è la bellezza di vivere in un altro paese: ti apre la mente.

[@tic-tacdrin-drinn1505]

@@MsBritaly "Lo stile di vita." I'm curious: this would be a very interesting subject for one of your videos

[@AndreaScipioni-e3c]

i wish to share my experience. I started off in an english international school in northern italy. I attended it since i was in nursey. so from 98 to 2009 . went to italian highschool , realised i left the best place in my life. In the english school we were taught to be a big family and to greet all the new arrivals of pupils into the class. In italian school there were groups and I thought that being in the same class was synonim of being friends. Nothing worse than this thing. It was not true. Being in the same class meant just neing in the same class. Also for ormantic relationship , italians are very judgemental and when they say that they are democratic or openminded its just an exterior aspect that they useto be socially acceptable. When i went to japan for 6 months internship i was told " be careful japanese people are cold and distant". Can i be honest nothing compared to italians. I would argue that probably we are the most egoist and individualistic nation among the western countries. It tough but here friendship is based upon childhood.

[@gattafuffa4354]

You have to distinguish between northern and southern Italians. They have different cultures.

[@MsBritaly]

This is where things get really complicated

[@cvv9609]

Gli amici non esistono. Al massimo conoscenze. Se proprio sei fortunato di VERI amici ne hai uno o due

[@arslongavitabrevis5136]

As my wife says: "People come into your life, for a reason, a season or a lifetime" Two years ago I ended a deep and long-standing friendship of nearly 30 years; my ex-friend became a self-centred individual who stopped writing/phoning several years ago; the relationship lasted because I made an effort to keep it going, but, as I said to him: "Friendship is a two-way street and I had enough". Yes, people change, in fact, we all do, is part of something called "LIFE" which tends to be a bitch . Regards 😍

[@MsBritaly]

Yes, I agree with the season, reason or lifetime philosophy 100%.

[@Clodovicus]

I finished listening to your words (the last 5 minutes) and I discover that you are in Sicily, a region bent by historical dominations and then by the mafia, and in Palermo, a particular city, in some ways a capital of mafia. This choice surprises me, I don't know the reasons cause it's your first video that I have seen. I have to say that the rest of Italy (especially the north and center) also feels the difference in mentality with Sicily, the habit of suffering is even stronger there. But at the same time, in southern Italy you can also find the warmest hearts. If you have really found people there that you can trust and who trust you, it is a fortune and a fair reward for your effort. Without a doubt, a person who comes from outside and who has more open views will be much appreciated if also respects their values ​​without judging them. I wish you well and always better. I was born and still live in central Italy, a very balanced area between north and south. If you have been living in Italy for 6 years you certainly know that the difference between Sicily and Milan or Turin is very big... especially when it comes to technology. I don't know what you need exactly but maybe you could find what you are looking for elsewhere and use it in Palermo too. There is also a difference between seaside cities and more "inner" cities...

[@digitalfxpertagenc]

very nice content

[@MsBritaly]

Thank you!

[@digitalfxpertagenc]

@@MsBritaly welcome

[@digitalfxpertagenc]

@@MsBritaly Welcome and how are you

[@karenthompson9906]

Thank you for your observations. Very helpful . I’ve also heard from an expat that Italians are always busy with their families, making it hard to find time for new friends

[@MsBritaly]

Thank you - yes family life is very important for an Italian.

[@alessandromartina644]

Intelligente ed elegante, se non abitassi neglli Stati Uniti vorrei essere tuo amico! :)

[@MsBritaly]

Aw Grazie!

[@alessandromartina644]

@@MsBritaly 🙂

[@SalvatoriusMyspace]

you haven't seen other countries such as germany then..

[@gaia7240]

Haven't watched the video yet but I bet she says you can't really make friends in Italy, I'm Italian 26 and never had a friend, hundreds of friendly acquaintances that change every year, but not true friend

[@flaviaver4866]

In my opinion, italian are a little too interested in money and they value people according to the money they think they have. If they believe you might have money, they will give you more chances to become their friend. But if they believe you are poor, they will not give you a second of their lives

[@EliskaH-p7k]

According to my experience people here in Italy are too judging as they don't travel or study much. Plus, if you're a girl, most women hate on you because they're envious and most men talk to you just because they think strangers are easier to get in bed. Italians have their childhood friend circles and don't care to know really well anyone else.

[@MsBritaly]

Thank you for sharing your experience. I will say that mine has been somewhat different in that a lot of people I meet here study too much - in my humble opinion. Childhood friends are a huge part of life here.

[@FreeHeartDance]

@@MsBritaly Can I ask where you met these people who study a lot? I honestly had the same experience as the writer and I got really bored, not being able to speak with people at the same level.

[@ASMRJusTravelz]

Drink with them..chat and make them feel good

[@estbestest4656]

I even paid for them in the bars and it never worked

[@gaia7240]

Eh che non hai capito come funziona in Italia, c'è un sistema sociale ben definito, sei amico dei figli dei tuoi genitori, ed è come un club, o ci sei dentro o non ci sei, è forte questo istinto perché è così che siamo sopravvissuti credo non lo so, io sono 100% italiana ma siccome sono nata da genitori sfigati non venivo calcolata nonostante fossi gentile e tutto, impedivano pure agli altri bbini di giocare con me per dire, non credo neanche sia ignoranza e chiusura mentale di per sé, è proprio come funziona la macchina qui purtroppo

[@tic-tacdrin-drinn1505]

It's understandable that you get bored and want to "make" friends quickly when you're new in a place and all alone. But are YOU even ready to make friends with someone you've just met who (maybe) is also looking for a friend? Are you immediately ready to make friends with everyone you meet? To feel friendship, you need to be able to trust a person and learn more about them. Common interests can be a good start. In the beginning, a simple acquaintance can be enough to avoid feeling completely alone. After the first friendship, you probably won't be as obsessed with the idea of ​​"making" friends. Be patient and let a friendship develop: like a plant that needs water and care to grow.