When you craft a godlike wand in Noita

[@billybobjoeman99]

PISS LAZER

[@impostrous]

Unironically, go urinate on the moon, then on the dark sun

[@logygm4335]

@Kromgar1337 the moon is no more

[@metalurgent]

"My super Lazer piss" -eggman

[@kickskii]

I understand the words of wisdom so much better after pressing the translate to English button

[@frankcampos8803]

reminded me that Terraria has a yellow spell that literally is called golden shower

[@40wink]

There's nothing quite like a wand where you have to anchor yourself into a corner in order to use it for anything other than space exploration

[@Catfish270]

I once created a very powerful wand made from huge amount of lightnings, some kind of spell duplicator, hexagon and other interesting stuff. Without glass cannon (I wonder what would have happened if I had one) this wand (with weak trigger spell) was destroying everything from one corner of the screen to another with thousands of damage in one hit except me because I had an explosion protection. I want to see a similar wand but with more mana because I created it before even reaching Hiisi base and it wasn't very good

[@TurtleTracks-g1r]

I had this crazy fast wand that had always cast Recoil, it was beautiful, but nearly unusable

[@arobotarmy9878]

It’s not a truly powerful wand until your CPU can’t keep up.

[@finn4435]

I think its the game that bottlenecks before your cpu. Or so ive heard

[@geothegallant]

Gotta love orbital larpa orbital plasma beam plasma beam thrower divide by 10 mu wands that do 40 thousand damage a frame and make your game run at 2 frames a second

[@denizyldrm580]

-Master Oogway

[@feritperliare2890]

​@geothegallant2286 oh cool the game got a kill cam even when you commit suicide

[@lankymaccrazyhair264]

Just play on a crap computer, now every wand is 'powerful'

[@fabricatorzayac]

What's funny is that this wand is not even that powerful by Noita standards

[@greatestgrasshopper9210]

Just play for another 50 hours to know what is powerful

[@themyster1ous01]

There are much stronger wands that do not break the game as easily, but it's more fun to spam death lasers anyway. I also hate recoil so much. I'd rather not use a wall to control my position tyvm

[@jackw.5000]

@@themyster1ous01 Speak for yourself lol I love crazy recoil wands

[@morganthem]

@@jackw.5000 free levitation

[@jackw.5000]

@@morganthem EXACTLY

[@makkuhitu]

Noita's REAL final boss is your hardware specs

[@Drekromancer]

Real

[@ale_wlv]

Bro, my notebook becomes so slow when I run a seed with creepy liquid, it becomes unplayable...

[@garcello8246]

​@@ale_wlvYou wins!

[@nedia2868]

now all thats needed is to add rainbow glimmer and the concoction is completely improved

[@Feuerhamster]

Rainbow trail, because it's not a true wand until it deals damage to CPU too.

[@BrickRigsCreations]

I made a similar overpowered wand, but just a few minutes later a sniper knocked me back straight into a vat of acid

[@Catring]

Noita'd

[@allstarwoo4]

Machine gun wands are always fun, not always the most effective but fun.

[@SergioPSC]

The real scary shit is when a ghost of yourself has one of "those" wands

[@lefishe5845]

Playing challange mode: Ghost of me with glass cannon: Carrying a wand: Fires an entire nuke:

[@j-network1214]

anytime I hear a cacophony of music notes in the fist few layers I feel fear

[@vicenteperez2136]

i remember making a wand that turned stuff to gold and couldn't resist to rapid fire it everywhere ended up turning myself to gold with it dying instantly losing a run i spent hours on and i did it again just recently dying in the same way minus me spraying gold spark bolts all over the place

[@cactynemann4356]

I feel like it's just natural law at this point that for every second you're in possession of a good wand, the chances of you self-noita'ing yourself go up exponentially

[@Drekromancer]

@@cactynemann4356 The core fantasy that brings people to this game is the desire to become a wizard, but that's not what the game gives you. Instead, this game repeatedly reinforces the idea that all wizards are suicidally reckless lunatics willing to risk their life and limb for a slim chance at ascending to godhood. Most of the time, it shows you this through the exact mechanism you described: You're far more likely to Noita yourself when you're powerful, because the slightest taste of power makes you incredibly likely to blow yourself up. And the fact that you get humbled so many times is what makes it so sweet when you finally manage to survive. Against all of the odds, you've become the one in a million to ascend to godlike power. And you only appreciate that because you've seen how fucking insane you'd have to be in order to get there. I love this game.

[@Val-ud9fn]

This is my current run except I have saving grace that keeps me at 1hp instead of killing me when I accidentally Midas myself. I've had more than a few close calls 😅

[@garcello8246]

Midas moment

[@TungstenKing]

Same, but "gold?" Gif title: "impissed.gif" Was screensharing that run to friends, too, as it was the day of the epilogue update... ...They said I pissed myself... ...they won't let it go, to this day...

[@terrafin6354]

you didnt get noita'd? HE DIDNT GET NOITA'D EVERYBODY

[@kolbegd9215]

Noita is sick :)

[@Catring]

The most important character in Catrings lore just made a comeback

[@kolbegd9215]

@@Catring as you can see im not dead

[@Kanashi_9]

im suprised you managed to make a godwand with no wrapping, 2 sprinkles of add mana, and shockingly concentrated light.

[@Catfish270]

I have made almost the same wand as in the video, but it used double spell. And also... Glass cannon. When I have entered the jungle, the location stopped existing. When I tried attaching some strong effects to it (the wand had lots of free spaces for that) it was crashing the game

[@lukahutinski9075]

I dont like knockback, its coarse, rough and gets me everywhere i want to go but opposite. Not like here... short teleport with long dist cast. Everything is so smooth and soft

[@Catring]

Knocback is Micheal Bay of Noitas transportation

[@why_i_game]

If you use the modifier that shoots backward and forward at the same time, you can make knockback push you forward. 🙂

[@haroldbalzac6336]

​@@why_i_gameWhy have i never thought of this?

[@avamander.]

Try concentrated beam of light with 2* increase lifetime, 4*increase damage reduce speed, 1*teleport to target or seeking. It gets everyone besides statues and those teleporting bastards.

[@HuslWusl]

Why the increase lifetime?

[@christopherschneider2968]

@@HuslWuslTo increase range and with that safety.reduced speed for precision. I prefer glowing lance for a similar build since i neither need to reduce speed nor increase lifetime as much.

[@0m3GAARS3NAL]

Inaccurate, you didn't accidentally propel yourself into a pixel of polymorphine and die instantly like I do whenever I manage to build a god wand T_T

[@Terrible_name]

I love a wand that does not have any teleportation mixed into it, yet serves as a form of aerial locomotion

[@faerox7155]

funny thing is this is a very low level wand, it would quite literally tickle the end game content

[@sethb3090]

This is the wand you build to kick your way through snowy depths and hiisi base while you gather components for something that murders two rooms of enemies per click

[@HalfGroxus]

Stupid, brainless shitpost dank memes is just what this game's community needed. I thank you from the bottom of my heart!

[@mylittledarkworldjohn4289]

I cast disco lazer

[@atssen]

A wand that throws rocks with tentacles. I killed the final boss with that wand in 1 second, no joke

[@pelvist]

Should have collected more orbs!

[@rhileyisaacson9710]

Why is this video just so well put together i love it 😭

[@why_i_game]

Add Mana and Reduce Recharge Time are amazingly powerful spells!

[@Vitya47]

Please kiddo... Luminous drill + pingpong = destroy EVERYTHING

[@Drekromancer]

"Ha! You are like baby. Watch _THIS"_ _pulls out Wand of Multitudes, turns himself into a sheep, instantly teleports into a parallel world, and 360 noscopes the High Alchemist with a Mana to Power Giga Holy Bomb_

[@alexanderelliott8065]

I call that combo the stitcher. Great for sniping through walls.

[@iamspeed3804]

This is what I love about this game you make a cracked wand feel like god and feel like you broke the game then you try going somewhere where you think the devs might not have intended for you to go but ur always wrong and then you get murdered by some even more cracked shit

[@ckinggaming5bucketmadness766]

So, effectively a lightsaber gun wand

[@DiceMan20]

Every time I get a good wand and don't have a fuck ton of immunities I die by my own overconfidence ;-;

[@Jonas-Seiler]

Would have been way funnier if they got killed by some bullshit before getting any chance to actually put the wand to use

[@StarshadowMelody]

I have a rainbow variant of this made using the shit from that lab off to the right side of the map in the lake that goes so fast it lags the game

[@ZealothXyven]

"Brace yourself, it has a bit of kick." "A BIT!?"

[@juicyjuustar121]

I made a wand recently with a ping pong path add mana add damage triple cast luminous drill and it ended up resulting in my first victory after 150 hours of the game. Yeah it might not be THAT powerful compared to the stuff Ive seen other people make but to ME I felt invincible with it. It was completely useless against the alchemist boss tho :(

[@FangsofYima]

Good start, but you'll know youve truly arrived in wandmaking when the game freezes every time you fire it and the sound is horribly crushed and loud.

[@rocovailo2862]

My favorite wand i've crafted so far is quite simple really. Teleport projectile + rock Even better with infinite spells perk. Its such an overpowered wand. Kills almost anything in hilarious physica fashion. Sticks around perminantly as a trap. Fitting that run i died because i accidently steped into polymorph potion and was next to one of my rocks. The betrayal!

[@MorganSaph]

Concentrated spells perk + 4-5 sparks bolts with a quadcast and doublecast or 2 triplecasts. Almost no recoil and ridiculous damage. Especially if you can rapid fire, get damage modifiers or freezing charge

[@hollowsongs3504]

It hurts to get noita'd, but hurts way more when you get noita'd with a god wand like this

[@TacoEric]

nice, I once somehow got to a wand that had two damage boosts seeking double range spell with a single Plasmabeam cross.... it was brutal, it dealt THOUSANDS of damage in literal Milliseconds. The Boss died before it could get the first attack out... and that was how I got my first win... lol

[@thecwd8919]

Dont do my boy the chainsaw like that. i saw that.

[@redgarlicbred6228]

Plasma beam + homing shots are my go to, add increase duration and whatever modifiers you can in that beam and there you go, just aim vaguely at a direction and pray to god there isn't an enemy near you where the beam can track

[@rallbot6090]

V good quality memery, I’m a noita baby so I have unhinging to be done but this game is something I can tell already

[@CoucouYoutube]

I'M A' FIRIN' MAH LAZER!!

[@dauraktv]

I had a similar wand but with the green missiles. It was INSANE. And fairly safe when careful

[@Kraftik611]

You know it's good, when the wand is also transportation

[@Chatisthisrealquestionmark]

the gods are NOT afraid.

[@slava_fuflikam]

The only your enemy that can unalive you is you

[@fadedfrank7484]

sparkbolt with trigger chainsaw and maybe a little bit of notes for extra spice and you got yourself a truly powerful wand

[@allorfh2495]

This is the wand that can propel you from the bottom of the map to the top in mere seconds (well no this exactly but idea is the same just)

[@uk6396]

Also fun is spark bolt with trigger -> octagonal pattern -> sawblade orbit -> plasma beam. Instantly deletes everything, including gold, so not good if you need gold, but good to kill everything including bosses and yourself instantly

[@alfiearmadillo]

Even though I know its a bad idea I always just do something like putting acid trail on wands like that. Im sure you know how it goes

[@Steir12]

Oh god i wouldn't put acid trail on even if i had acid immunity perk.

[@alfiearmadillo]

@@Steir12 Ok but hear me out: its fun for those 12 seconds you get to live

[@sethb3090]

When I let the intrusive thoughts win, acid trail goes on Bouncing Bolt. Fire it into a room you don't like and leave

[@wingdingfontbro]

Just a few days ago I made a want that rapid fired darkbolts that triggered explosions. Good times. Until I blew myself up in the cramped space of stage 4.

[@Deimos001]

This build is know "fuck everything in that general direction"

[@stendaalcartography3436]

This is just the right amount of POWA. Too much, and everything is iiiiiinnnnn sssllloooowww mmmmoooottttiiiiiioooooonnnnn

[@sunbreh9075]

Yesterday i had this exact setup but with the bouncing spell perk and a wand with always cast: personal gravity field, the run died after i picked up the double perk perk in the shop before kolmi and got glass canon from it... atleast kolmi died in 2 seconds

[@vallytheeg8317]

Wait until bro finds the 3 pixels of polymorphine in the most crouded level ever

[@sciencepluspotato1294]

If you want something really funny, try having the payload be a spark bolt with fireball orbit.

[@Drekromancer]

Can confirm, have made fireball chainguns before. Those things are incredibly dangerous without fire and explosion immunity. But not as dangerous as a machine gun with sawblade orbit. That shit will shred the entire map.

[@GuideTerrarian]

@@Drekromancer I have made a wand that uses the sawblade orbit while also being (mostly) safe, as expected; it does LARGE amounts of damage. Though, I found new ways that don't include sawblade orbit while being as strong or maybe even stronger than the sawblade orbit build.

[@platinumchromee3191]

You know your wand is good when sheer amount of BRRRRRRt is enough to make you fly.

[@bungercolumbus]

Wait until you craft a sniper wand which deals 1500 dmg in a single click.

[@rallbot6090]

More noita content when you can plssss ^o^

[@Catring]

Wish that I could, I realy do

[@chrisj3938]

10/10 noita meme, excellent music choice

[@Кирилл-ы6ь3н]

You can use double use to replase addition mana. It will use twise all your spell's buff and you still has double mana

[@DI4_]

Если в вашей палочке нет ядерной боеголовки или хотя-бы пропанового баллона - вы не настоящая ведьма

[@ClockworkGearhead]

Not shown: the world's spin accelerating or decelerating depending on the aim.

[@nathanpfirman625]

Now do 1 trillion heart Kolmi

[@ternadav332]

poly wizards: my time has come

[@alpergumulu9547]

this got to the be best noita short I've ever seen

[@GermanTopGameTV]

I had a similar wand in a run, no add damage, but add mana coupled with refresh and this laser cast. The recoil killed me because I panicked in the second to last level when these huge spiders attacked me, pushed me backwards across the map straight into a puddle of lava. I'm a spark bolt guy now, fuck recoil.

[@Krashic0]

Homing, piercing, spore pod + smth for good shot speed, equals to powerful simple wand

[@undergravitydownforce714]

Thats a pretty good flight wand 😂

[@viktorhugo1715]

Now put a divide by 2 omega in the start of the wand and be happy

[@zHowie]

give ya wand a good ol' rub! love the ingredients bit at the start, beautiful work that!

[@Jewels___]

There's a wand in your recoil, mate

[@SuperCosmicChaos]

The recoil is over 9000.

[@FMGT97]

Babe, wake up, the sickest Noita edit just dropped!

[@takeshihanataro3871]

My favorite flying wand by far

[@Tempus62]

grats, you earned that completion!

[@sircuffington]

You can pretty much find this wand at the top of the tower.

[@alkeryn1700]

i had that with golfball lumi drill and accidentally electrocuted myself lol.

[@Grandpa_Max45]

ungodly amount of recoil

[@ВолодимирВільчинський-с7б]

this the freaking death star laser

[@gloom5405]

The Gods are Impressed

[@average_tax_evader]

best one I ever made was : chainsaw 2x / spells to power / accelerate spell / add mana / dmg field/ double cast/ and spore.... this did like 2K constant dmg, khome survived for abt 2 secs

[@vishipsherrah]

I once crafted a similar wand but with no damage plus and died literally a minute later

[@axialivanov6101]

Luminous drill with a spell wrap and pingpong path is the best

[@hahaalexasendthistorodrick]

Did this with triplicate bolts and ended up dying as the range was horrible and using it would throw me into the backrooms

[@elsgare8485]

Also doubles as a jetpack.

[@Irmis98]

And than random explosion instantly kills you

[@GrandpaGameHacker]

Absolutely beautiful

[@mortal9957]

ping-pong, mana decrease, drilling light

[@matiasarrua7935]

damn, my first good wand (well, the only good wand i found) was an allways cast add mana with 5 slots, no shuffle and that exact setup (kinda) one crit plus, another add mana, one that made shots explode, a saw and a laser thing, i only took away the saw and added the dmg plus... I ended up dying to an alchemist that threw a random polimorph thing and made me a fish (then he threw acid at me lmao)

[@rareram]

Immediately gets mad that plus damage isn't at the end and add mana is before the concentrated light.

[@OphanAzirafel]

fine, i'll download noita.

[@Ser_humanoblrank]

Bro created Avada Kedavra

[@SPP-gd3ir]

1000W Laser beam

[@thomashubbell4696]

I want this game so bad

[@Rayo75]

MY SUPER. LASER. PISS!

[@MarmotDark]

Bruh and that doesnt even scratch the surface of what you can do.

[@MarmotDark]

not saying thats bad just that noitas super complicated. Also thats awsome

[@snakedragon9953]

never call me a racoon. EVER.

[@Catring]

Greyish ratlike thief 🦝

[@snakedragon9953]

@@Catring acceptable

[@christianboi7690]

I remember I had a wand like this except it was multiples of that laxer weapon and for some reason when I shot it the environment around me just collapsed. I shot it in a temple and the whole thing collapsed and angered the gods. I was surprised because I didn’t think it would do that. I swear all I had were this lazers and the map around me would crumble no matter what direction I shot.

[@Soulsphere001]

I'm surprised that fires so quickly. It must have been a fast firing wand to start with. I also can't see how much damage it's doing. Is that ten thousand damage per second or only one thousand per second?

[@Catring]

1K dps

[@Soulsphere001]

@@Catring Okay, thank you for the reply.

[@quinnbuffet3825]

*The Gods are Afraid*

[@unknowntraceur264]

With almost the same wand I got my first win haha