Why Germans Are So Misunderstood By Americans 🇩🇪

After moving to Germany and as I have been learning German, there has been one specific area in my quest to understand Germans that has continuously alluded me...😊
#AmericansInGermany #GermanyVlog #MovingToGermany
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❤️Aubrey was a Speech-Language Pathologist, Donnie was a graphic designer, but we both had a dream to #travel the world and experience cultures. After three years of being married and dreaming about if something like this great adventure would be possible, we decided to quit the rat race and take on the world. We sold everything we had, quit our jobs, and took off! After 9 months of aimless and nonstop travel, we now get to fulfill our dreams of #LivingAbroad as #expats as we move to #Germany!

[@PassportTwo]

What do you think of our BIG ANNOUNCEMENT?? 😃

[@christyp4740]

Exciting!!!!

[@dansattah]

Congratulations and all the best to you!

[@Wolfspaule]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch! Schwangerschafts-Kurse und Hebamme suchen, und keine giftigen Farben im Kinderzimmer/Spielzeug, fällt mir dazu ein.

[@Wolfspaule]

"well..." = wie soll ich das sagen "well..." = Naja...

[@Wolfspaule]

With that fill-in "ja" you are fisching a reaction of your talking partner. It is also normally followed by a short pause, to give the other a chance to react or to catch their reaction. It is only used in direct communication, because of that. You also give the opurtunity for the other to add something, like: Achja, bei uns kann man sie wieder besuchen. I would call it an expecting "ja", but maybe that is professionally called soften, I don't know.

[@ErklaerMirDieWelt]

"Well..." can be translated as "Naja..." to fulfill the same function in German. "Ja" in the sentence about the gym doesn't change the whole meaning. It just indicates that the speaker expects the listener to already be familiar with the information given in that part of the sentence, whereas the first example would be used if both parts (the gyms are closed + I bought weights) were news to the listener.

[@pollux442]

"Nun..." or "Nun ja..." would also work.

[@andreaseufinger4422]

@@pollux442 "Wenn ich ehrlich bin, ..."

[@tom.shanghai]

ämm...

[@silkwesir1444]

oder "Also..."

[@yanzi8543]

My husband asks me also always about these words..like apparently the series we are watching is full of "najas". X)

[@LaureninGermany]

Before I go any further, I want to say that I really appreciate you not using your pregnancy announcement as clickbait. I think that’s very sympathisch! Congratulations! It’s a wonderful thing, very best wishes!

[@berulan8463]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch, Congrats and all the best for you three.

[@PassportTwo]

Thank you very much! 😊

[@Grandy_UiD]

Might be more than three, who knows 😉

[@berulan8463]

@@Grandy_UiD The more the merrier. 🖖😁👍

[@mizapf]

Modal particles, the magic wand of the German language. I love them, and I miss them so much in foreign languages. In school, we just called them "Füllwörter" because the linguists did not know how to classify them, and declared them just as fillers. I disagree to some extent that "ja" makes sentences sound softer. If you insert "ja" in your sentence, you express that the fact you are conveying is a well-known fact, common sense, that is, you also say that you as the speaker know about this fact, and you assume the same from the recipient. In your example sentence, the speaker says that the gyms are closed, and in parallel you assure your recipient that this is not a surprise to you. The sentence may feel "softer" because this is some kind of "verbal embracing". There are lots of other particles, like "doch", "halt", "eben" which all convey a particular mood of the speaker. Even "vielleicht" appears as a modal particle, not meaning "perhaps" but "gosh!", like in "Das ist vielleicht ein altes Haus" ("Gosh, that is an old house!"). There is even a new modal particle "langsam" (appearing in the 20th century, I think), not meaning "slow" but "I'm getting impatient with this situation". Example: "Kommst du langsam?" ("Now will you come, or keep me waiting?"). Some example of different modal particles with the same sentence: "Der Laden ist zu." - "The shop is closed." "Der Laden ist ja zu." (The shop is certainly closed, as we all should know; could also mean surprise, depending on stress: Hey, that shop is closed!) "Der Laden ist doch zu." (The shop is closed, didn't you know? Differs by stress on "zu" or "doch".) "Der Laden ist halt zu." (The shop is closed, alas, nothing we can do about it.) "Der Laden ist wohl zu." (The shop is closed, as it seems.) "Der Laden ist schon zu." (The shop is closed, I won't deny; not meant by time but as a probably disputed fact; "schon" gets stress in the sentence, not "zu") "Der Laden ist bloß zu." (The shop is closed, but no worries, it's not worse)

[@rivenoak]

ohja, das kommt oft vor.

[@salzlakritz818]

If I'm not mistaken, linguists call those words "Modalpartikel". And I sure miss them in the English language. A Russian friend of mine doesn't call those words Füllwörter but Müllwörter, because she thinks that these words make no sense and are useless. But I think, that they are so helpfull to change the meaning of a sentence ever so slightly.

[@icerepublic]

Absolutely right. Modal particles are extrmely Important to learn if you really want to understand spoken German and many other languages don't have them.

[@mizapf]

I think it is fair to say that the German modal particles are early, textual ancestors of today's ubiquitous Emojis.

[@icerepublic]

@@mizapf Really interesting idea to think of them as Emojis. Although, I think there is a bit more to it: There isn't for example an emoji to suggest that what you say is obvious but we have the "ja" and "doch" modal particles. I think the modal particles are more subtle. They only modify the meaning slightly. That's what makes them so powerful. You can micro-adjust the meaning of a sentence.

[@DieBlutigeLynn]

You should definitely learn German modal particles, as they are typical for and very important in German and will make your understanding and production of spoken language so much better and more nuanced! I had to learn to omit/transform them differently in German-French translations. I believe in English they are also much less used than in German. Mal, eben, gerade, ja, aber, doch, halt, schon, denn, eh, sowieso, gar, ruhig, bloß, wohl, eigentlich, einfach, vielleicht, dann, ... And very important: the interjection "Ach so!"

[@johnpage4853]

und in Fränkisch: fei

[@markusdurr1042]

@@johnpage4853 or: Passt scho

[@jk9554]

@@johnpage4853 gell? (und wer bringt ihm _etz_ noch Dolln/Doldi bei, damit er die Leute beim Fluchen auch richtig ansprechen kann?)

[@vmrre8267]

@@jk9554 was soll Dolln sein?

[@Execuor]

@@vmrre8267 Fränkisch für Tölpel

[@thepurplesmurf]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch Euch beiden 🍾🐣 For written communication there are emoticons/emojis to express feelings or emphasis the mood of the conversation. Of course this doesn't really work with formal letters/mails. Understanding emotions, sarcasm, humor and so on, is a huge part of understanding a foreign language. Vocabulary and grammar is what anyone can learn and memorize to form basic sentences, but this is only the foundation of understanding another language really well. But don't worry, anyone goes through this when learning a new language.

[@gracelast5487]

Congratulations on your great announcement!!! In regards to the swearing thing, it definitely feels somehow tamer to swear in english. Some english swear words are not really percieved as swear words at all but are just kind of reactionary expressions, at least among younger Germans. Also Tea ALL THE WAY! I never got into coffee and to this day I don't understand the obsession so many people have with it xDD

[@PassportTwo]

Thanks so much!! 😊😊

[@therealshazz]

I 100% agree with this

[@pjschmid2251]

How interesting. I grew up in an American family with German grandparents, great aunts and uncles, so there were certain German words that were just around the house (mostly food related words with a few expletives and rebukes sprinkled in the mix). The German swear words ended up being sort of joke "fake" swear words that were allowable for us kids in a way that the English versions were not.

[@Llortnerof]

German can sound much more aggressive when it wants to. English is kinda... softened down, i suppose. As is tradition in my home region, tea.

[@LythaWausW]

It's always tamer to cuss in English, that's why almost all Germans have potty mouths when they speak to almost all Americans. When I was young I read, "It's nearly never appropriate to swear in another language." It's not your own and you don't convey it precisely.

[@humanoid8549]

I would translate the „Well“ in the movie example with „Na ja“ When asked about your opinion on a subject and you don’t really like it, just begin the sentence with „Na ja“ fort example: „Na ja, mir hat der Film zugegebenermaßen nicht so gut gefallen“

[@claudiakarl7888]

Or use „also…“

[@xunvenile]

@@claudiakarl7888 yes! Naja.. also uhm

[@Cau_No]

"Reading between the lines" comes only with experience, no course can teach you that. For a long time I believed to be bilugual you need to be born into two langueges. But then, through much reading and watching movies in original audio without subtitles, I finally became it myself. When I took my Cambridge exams for Business English (BEC higher) and Proficiency (CPE), I still had to learn a lot that my school teachers missed out on. Also, I'm a tea person, or as I say: "Coffee's not my cup of tea." I found it too bitter, except for some "Landkaffee", which is made from barley malt (the biggest brand here is 'Caro') However, the strongest coffee I ever tried was a cup of pure cocoa on a trip in Guatemala…

[@chaosmagican]

"I found it too bitter" cries to me that you only had subpar coffee so far or it was made incorrectly (too hot or inappropriate grind size/overextraction makes it bitter). Most "bistro coffee" is that way. The worst offender is McDonalds, you can put 2 kg sugar into one cup and it still tastes bitter. Don't get me wrong there are some more bitter coffees but if it's the main thing you taste the coffee is most probably meh. (also coffee from cocoa?)

[@Cau_No]

​@@chaosmagican I tried coffee multiple times, and never at MacDonalds (I don't eat there neither.) It's just not my taste, like e.g. liquorice and other things - people have different experiences with the same foods, ir does not matter how good they are. Your assumptions are somewhat arrogant, so stop preaching as if I insulted some Mayan gods here. And if you don't get the cocoa joke, you should read up on how chocolate is actually made. The raw stuff, without any sugar tastes very different. (Also, the active ingredients in coffee and cocoa beans, called caffeine and theobromine, are chemical derivatives. Those are related.) Or maybe you could just learn how to read irony and sarcasm.

[@SharienGaming]

heh yeah i had a similar experience - a lot of that proficiency and deeper understanding in a foreign language comes with immersion in the culture the language is from (does not need to be by being in the country, though thats likely the fastest way - long regular consumption of native language media and generally talking to a lot of native speakers goes a long way as well) at some point you stop translating and simply comprehend what the other person is saying directly (which also can lead to funny situations where you dont notice which language you were using in a situation) and usually at this point you have also absorbed a lot of the common idioms and cultural cues when it comes to the tone and subtext of whats being said for example i have found that in some cases when my parents asked me for translations on some english words... i could only explain what they meant, because i couldnt remember the german word for them... i learned both the english and the german word for them...but there just was no direct connection between the two in my brain and on the tea vs coffee question - im pretty much a tea person... coffee never tasted right to me, but i thoroughly enjoy a wide range of herbal and fruity teas and lately ive even started enjoying black tea (and cocoa in a tea infusion is actually preeeetty good) =)

[@TheRealAquaz]

@@chaosmagican then everyone should make Coffee wrong, cause black and bitter Coffee is the best

[@theopuscula]

Congratulations on the baby! The problem here is particles, such as "ja" that are very common in German, but not common in many other languages and that are something that can hardly be picked up in a foreign language class. The "ja" thrown in literally means "the information I am now stating is something that is fairly obvious and you almost definitely already know, but I just want to say it here, because this information is also the reason/important in context for what I am going to say next". So, yeah, it makes the statement softer, but in a pretty specific way. The word "doch" can mean pretty much the opposie ("Hey, don't you know this information? I thought everyone knew that? I think you should now that!"). Like, when someone now asks after the videoo: "Warum ist Aubrey nicht mehr in den Videos?" "Sie ist doch schwanger!"

[@j.f.6687]

Best explanation for both words :)

[@vully70]

And the same sentence with ja: Meine Frau ist ja schwanger, deshalb mache ich die Videos erstmal allein. As you know my wife is pregnant. That‘s why I‘m going to do the videos allone in the near future.

[@Dahrenhorst]

Congrats and all the best! 😊 I'm over 60 now. As a German, I had English classes in school for 8 years, 2 to 4 hrs a week. When I got to the military, I had a sixth month English language course with 6 hrs English language training every day. I had an additional six weeks English language training for pilots, again six hours English every day. I was assigned to a multinational NATO unit for four years, where English was the the main language. Later I worked for English speaking companies like GE, did speeches in English in the UK and the USA and wrote lots of business and science articles in English language. I read most books and watch many movies and series in their original English language version. I more or less speak English as a second language for over 40 years now, and I'm still not really fluent. I think, I understand everything what's said, but I still can't express myself as I can in German. You will always get better with your German language skills, but most likely in the nuances you will always feel more comfortable in your native language, unless you commit to Germany and its language and start using English as your second language. I've learned that from my sister, who lives in Norway: doing that, you'll need approx. 10 years to feel real comfortable in the new language to a point, that you'll forget some expressions and words of your native language. I think, not knowing or using the finer parts of the German language as a foreigner is much less a problem here as it would be vice versa in the USA. Firstly, Germans are more used to people not speaking their own language. We run into those practically every day. Secondly, especially Americans are much more easily offended by what is said and how it is said than Germans. We can be direct and open, and we can deal with it; political correctness, saving face and being non-offensive is a much bigger thing in the USA than here. So if you miss the nuances, it is much less a thing here than over there. Don't worry to much over that. tld: If you want to speak and understand German language like a German does, you need to make it your first language and around 10 years. If you don't, you will most likely never achieve this. But that's not really a problem here, regarding that as a problem is American mindset. I'll take tea, btw.

[@StarshipTr00per]

Congrats on the new family member 👏. I am a French native speaker from Canada. My second language is English and I totally get what you are saying. It took me a long time to get the nuances in emotional communication in English and like you I still often misunderstand what is written in German, even if I live in Germany for 6 years now. Like you I have passed the B1. The other big issue for me is the none active listening. If I don't pay close attention to what is said, like on TV for example, I ear German like I don't understand anything. It's like I don't speak it. English is for me now almost like my native language. I make no conscious effort to understand all the nuances and intricacies. I think in English, read it effortlessly and passively ear what is said in the background and will actively listen when something said capture my attention. I remember when I first realized that I was finally fluent in English. We went to see twister in cinema and I thought it was the dubbed French version. In the middle of the film I jumped and said out loud to my girlfriend ( who is a native English speaker). "IT'S IN ENGLISH". People started laughing... yeah of course you idiot 🤣 but for me it was a HUGE realization. I am now totally fluent. I can switch between the 2 instantly back and forth. Both languages have their own respective living space in my brain ... German ... not at all. It is still tries to find its place. It's like it's homeless and tries to push its way in where English lives. I can't wait for the time when that I FINALLY realize that I am fluent in German. I am 59 now, l now understand that to get there in English took me many years and I was much younger. Maybe I'll be there before I'm 80 🤣🤣🤣 Anyhow. I usually don't write long messages like that but what you said here got me thinking about own journey Language learning. It's a long process that many people get ro master faster and others need many years to achieve. Good luck in your own journey and the best to your young family 👪

[@Robidu1973]

You perfectly describe my situation, just that the roles of German and French are reversed for me. Alas, the sad part is that I had learnt French at school, but in 9th and 10th grade my teacher had done a great job at ruining it so I finally ditched it after 11th (too much damage already done, and my grades had gone straight down to a D): Swotting isn't going to work if you are someone who is intuiting a foreign language, and just practicing tenses or whatever without putting them to good use had me quickly zone out. Right now I'm attempting to resolve all this mess, but it hasn't worked out too well so far.

[@mweh3936]

Congrats - and a small tipp: We have that midwife system in Germany, which is really helpful and good esp. for the first kid. And totally covered by the health insurance. But: Midwifes have become rare, so better start as soon as possible to search for one. I think it is a good idea to use smileys in digital communication to express emotions clearly. And: coffee.

[@PassportTwo]

We have our Hebamme already picked out and have been communicating with her! Thanks for the tip 😊

[@oLynxXo]

I've been fluent in English for over 15 years and I'd say the emotional connection is there now, but I do remember swearing being a lot easier at the beginning. To this day I don't and probably will never understand the aversion to the word moist, though. 😅 I feel your struggle with modal particles. I only became aware how many we have when I studied Japanese. English barely has any. The nuances are probably the hardest thing to learn in any language. The best you can do is to immerse yourself as much as possible. Read German subreddits, read German books, watch youtube videos. Try to avoid your native language as much as possible when online. Your brain will figure it out sooner or later.

[@Bea-ex1yf]

I really like how deep your reflection about language and learning a new language is! The lack of emotions with words changed for me after school, when i learned english more from social media and of course by reading my favorite books in English... Some words or phrases i learnd this way i still hear in the characters voice :)

[@BlueFlash215]

Having learned English from 5th grade on it took time until I realized I have to watch, read, talk English to truly feel it. I knew that I wouldn't be able to grasp everything, miss a lot of jokes and actually feel tired sometimes. Visiting English speaking countries, it takes me 1 or 2 days until I start dreaming in English. Since I'm living in the exact same town like you, you are aware we have a lot of US American friends living next to us. My brain feels like it is rewired. Since my wife is an English and German teacher we sometimes struggle to find the German equivalent of an English word. So we just use the English word in the sentence. This happens quite often and not only with carried over English words but with almost all words. Sometimes we just say an English sentence because it's quicker. I definitely ties emotions to words and I knew for a fact that I got better at English as teenager when I stopped translating words in my head. I can think in English if that makes any sense. I get what you ate experiencing and I think Corona and the lack of social interactions strengthens that circumstance. You'll get past it someday but I feel like you actually need to commit to a language

[@obadiahslope1]

Reduced emotional resonance of language is a fact, and it affects terms of endearment, too. So those of you in international love relationships, beware!

[@PassportTwo]

As we are not a international relationship, I wouldn't have even thought of that aspect! Really interesting point and now something I want to "interview" our friends that are in international relationships about 😅 Thanks for the thought!

[@WakingUp77]

I notice that English speakers use the term "I love you" much more liberally than Germans use "Ich liebe dich". We have a softer version of it in "Ich hab dich lieb", which you would say to a good friend maybe. But "Ich liebe dich" is reserved mostly for romantic partners and family members, and even with family members you might prefer "Ich hab dich lieb". I have heard American men say "I love you, (man)" to each other if they are good friends. German men would hardly ever say even "Ich hab dich lieb" to another male friend.

[@girlfromgermany]

@@WakingUp77 Die Deutschen hätten dann womöglich sogar Angst, als schwul gesehn zu werden 😂

[@maximilianemustermann815]

@@PassportTwo Sometimes it is not a problem but a blessing if you don't pick up everything. An acquaintance searched for a wife here in Germany. He then married his pen friend from the Philippines and they are happy and have three children. He has a certain kind of weird about him. You have to say everything to him explicitly. Enough to drive me away but I always knew he was nice and reliable so international partnership was the way to go. Also I suspect that she thinks his choice of music is exotic while I couldn't handle the "volkstümliche Musik" at all when driving in his car.

[@endlessstudent3512]

Probably the reason why I like to read tacky romance novels in English...but I cannot read them in German. In German, my native language, I gringe so much a cannot stand that shit. But in English I like it just fine.

[@Speireata4]

You are the first person who is learning a new language, I encountered, who talked about noticing this problem. But you are totally right about your observations. I am currently refreshing my knowledge of Irish using an app and face a similar problem. The app offers several translations for two words but doesn't convey what the differences are, so I am not sure at all what the connotations are and which word to use in which situations. With English I don't have that problem anymore, at least not in most cases. You will start to get a feeling for the emotions and connotations in due time. Don't be frustrated in the meantime.

[@OnwardMJ]

Congrats! So excited for you. I was actually thinking about why Aubrey wasn't there right before you made the announcement. And I totally agree with the challenges of reading German texts and emails...but I appreciate that I can take the time to translate anything I don't understand! I found it interesting that a lot of my friends here send voice messages over Whatsapp instead of texts. Great for hearing the tone of the message, but definitely something that none of my American friends did. (And both, coffee and tea)

[@martinjunghofer3391]

Das Wörtchen "ja" in dem Satz stellt eine Verbindung her zwischen dem Sprecher und dem Zuhörer, ein emotionales Gleichschwingen, es läßt beide im selben Boot sitzen; daß es "softer" klingt, ist nur Nebeneffekt!

[@rizzo170980]

First of all, Glückwunsch zur Schwangerschaft. I understand your problem but i don't think it's a typical german thing. This is a problem everybody has when learning a foreign languages. I, for example, learned English at school for 10 years. But i still struggle sometimes to understand everything when americans talk to each other. watching a film in English is also not always easy for me. Even if I understand 80% of the film, it is often this 20% that is missing to understand the actual meaning or the message of the film. but for this case there is the subtitle. 😉

[@Daneelro]

I have been using English every day for over two decades, and I consider my written English better than that of 75% of native speakers, but sometimes I, too, still need subtitles, and not only when it's some dialect. (I don't have the same problem with German, which is a second language for me, too.)

[@simplegermany]

Congrats!!! 🥰 about your video topic, Jen and I totally agree 100% on everything you pointed out. Jen struggles just like you do (even after 9 years 🙈). And …you are amazing at explaining abstract topics 😉! Jen prefers coffee, I prefer tea 😋

[@NormanKlingspor]

All the best wishes to all 3 of you! :) (and keep on doing those videos, as it is really fun and interesting to look at home through different eyes)

[@24btor]

Wonderful topic! So interesting. Thank you for posting this video 🙏🏼

[@twinmama42]

Congrats on the good news! I understand what you want to express because it's the same for me. After 45+ years of learning, speaking, and writing English almost every day, but having never lived in an English-speaking country, I still sometimes struggle with conversations lacking some kind of clue i.e. mails and phone calls. Not seeing the other persons face is as bad as not hearing the intonation as an indicator of the intended mood or meaning Coffee, but actually I prefer hot chocolate. But yes, when I want my fix of caffeine, I prefer coffee.

[@deskotjes6536]

I think rather than emotionally reduced I feel more emotionally mature when I communicate in English. That’s why swear words are not as “viscerally” impactful for me in English as in German. After all we have our first encounter with these words in our native language when we are kids and often times connote it with something forbidden and bad. When we are teenagers or adults however and come into contact with the word “f*ck” we are emotionally a lot more stable and settled and therefore can use it without as much baggage. (Probably debatable what’s better, but that’s not the point 😅) Precisely for this reason I personally prefer to think or talk about very emotional stuff in English rather than in German, because I can sort through my emotions a lot more clearly and express myself in a more structured way.

[@Daneelro]

Teens, emotionally stable!? 🙂 For me, both English & German were foreign languages acquired when I was a teenager in Germany. Since teens insult each other it's no wonder I never felt that emotional reduction in German. Then again, I haven't felt it in English, either. (I generally don't like cursing.)

[@deskotjes6536]

@@Daneelro Let me rephrase that with: the base of emotional regulation has (under healthy conditions) already been set (even though in your teens during puberty the whole thing gets shaken up quite a bit). As a young kid your main source of emotional regulation are your parents, while growing up it gets internalized more and more. But I agree, calling teens emotionally stable probably doesn’t really fit that well, hah.

[@puzzlekuchen]

interesting, i know what you mean with talking in english when it's emotional. I mean, I'm still emotional but i just tend to text automatically in english to my best friend when getting highly emotional. It's just easier to get thru.

[@ivanerstic6443]

Yes, swearing is important, I explained to Germans the importance of swearing in the Croatian language, they looked at me strangely. The English language is also great for swearing, I admit it, it gives importance and weight to thought.

[@conniebruckner8190]

Tea for breakfast, coffee with pastries in the afternoon. ✨Congratulations, great news!!🎉 Yes, at first when I began to learn German , or rather when German-speaking people spoke to me, their advice always sounded so rude and commanding. ('you MUST take a left, then YOU MUST turn right', 'you WONT do that for my sake...') Now 42 years later, I hear all the subtleties. However your examle of the 'ja' word thrown in there also threw me off. Had to ask hubby 🙂

[@girlfromgermany]

Congratulations Donnie and Aubrey! Wonderful news! 🥳 All the best for you three 💖 And yes, I totally agree with you, in a second language there's always a certain language barrier. That's what I noticed too (in my case in English). A very good example is: I love to say "(süßer) Schnucki" which could be translated with "sweet cutie-pie". But "(sweet) cutie-pie" definitely doesn't mean the same to me as "(süßer) Schnucki". The words themselves mean the same, but it's a totally different emotional meaning. And the answer to the random question is: Both! In the morning I like to drink a big mug of coffee, and the rest of the day I like to drink tea.

[@mizot84]

Congratulations! 🙂 Interesting themes here. 9:16 I can support that it's totally different to curse (or use any emotional wording) in a different language. I know people living in Germany for more than 15 years, speaking very good German. There are definitely things/words they can easily say in German that they would never say in their mother tongue. Also true the other way round: Even by speaking German for so many years now they haven't build an emotional connection to some (positive) words in German than they have in their primary language. Transporting emotions in another language that your own is very difficult and hard.

[@Balu_420]

First: My deepest respect to you, putting so much effort into learning German! Thats integration

[@Lemming7373]

Hey there, first time viewing one of your videos and such a great announcement, congratulations! I can totally relate to that. In a language that you don't speak that well, you understand the words and get the meaning of the sentence and that's it. In your native language you immediately think of all the other ways to say roughly the same thing and the slight variations in meaning and get a lot more information from the same sentence.

[@francisluna3979]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch! Reduced emotional Resonance of Language/ makes swearing easier?! Honestly it's not just the swearing. "I love you" feels more like "I like you"

[@BlueFlash215]

Well best translates to "Nun", "Naja" or "Hm"

[@brittadiekmann8006]

Congratulations!!! I'm so happy for you!!! I'm definitely more of a tea person. I'll drink (and enjoy) both though. It all comes down to whom I'm spending time with at that moment and the overall circumstances. While I studied English at school for 6 or 7 years I got to understand it best by reading books, listening to (and trying to understand) music, and watching tv shows/youtube in English. Anyhow... I have a big friendgroup online with whom I comunicate in English and that helps me bunches to understand the small verbal hints/idioms. I guess what I wanted to say is: It takes time but with enough time and practice you'll master those stumbles eventually.

[@jade9248]

Awesome video! Congrats you guys✨❤️

[@alicemilne1444]

I'll preface this by saying that I do so understand you. I went through the same process about 50 years ago when I began learning German in Germany as a mid-teen and then went through the process again in my thirties in Spain. The one difference was that I grew up bilingual, speaking (UK) English and (French) French, in a multicultural extended family so I was already aware of the function and differing emotive weights of different words (including swear words) in different languages and sociocultural contexts. Ignoring swearing for the moment, there are two different types of words at work here. Most people generally call them "Füllwörter" or "Flickwörter" (filler or patcher words) in German. However, technically they fall into two categories: Färbungspartikel (literally colouring particles, or more properly modal particles) und Heckenpartikel (hedging particles). Färbungspartikel are like context or mood setters, a little like colour filters on a photograph or the musical score to a movie scene. Depending on the filter or mood of the music, the emotion or wider context of the utterance changes. Heckenpartikel are used when a person doesn't want to come straight out and say something, either because they don't want to offend or they want to cover their own back. These are mostly words that make statements less direct or less definite. This article explains the background in German. I've added spaces in the URL because YT sometimes doesn't post links. https : // www . jetzt . de / sprache / warum-fuellwoerter-schoen-sind Btw, the Halli-Galli-Klingel in that article refers to a card game with fruit or other symbols where you have to be the first to notice identical symbols on cards and bang a bell like the old bells on hotel reception counters. On to the subject of swearing, that is indeed a minefield. It is better not to swear at all in a second language until you have sussed out in what contexts native people use those swear words. This also applies to idioms. It usually takes a few years to learn to distinguish when swearing and certain idiomatic expressions are appropriate and when not. As a rule of thumb, avoid all expressions that have to do with bodily functions or urges until you are absolutely sure of which context and in what company you can use them. Oh, and for me it's coffee in the morning and tea in the afternoon.

[@orezlulu]

To the swearing thing: it is the same with love. "ich liebe dich" to my husband is so much stronger than " I love you" could ever be. That's just different.

[@LythaWausW]

I love you seems so empty and wrong, I don't want to hear it from my husband, it's weird. I've certainly never said it to him. If I said it, he'd think I'd been replaced by an alien version of myself.

[@Leenapanther]

In Switzerland we don't really say "Ich liebe dich". It's like what you describe with the "I love you". It's just not very strong?People usually say something like "Ich ha dich gern/ Ich ha dich uh mega fest gern (Ich mag dich/Ich habe dich sehr lieb).

[@shoshana577]

maybe it´s because native english speakers seem to "love" everything! the overuse of that word makes it so much smaller

[@xunvenile]

Omg so true! The German ich liebe dich sounds so much more deep and real in German idk why everytime I read "I love you" it's hard for me to understand like in what context? Many people using that without emotions especially on TikTok etc

[@darkofchaos_official]

There are also ,,Nominalisierung" where you can make a verb to a noun like ,,gehen", ,, das Gehen"

[@lindaemmerich]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch! I'm so happy for you guys! Stay safe🤗💕

[@MagicalOwls]

I don’t really have that problem with the emotions and things like that. It’s probably because I learned English when I was a child, so it‘s closer to a native language than a second language. But I can understand what you mean. When I just learned English I sometimes struggled with things like that too. Now, I don’t even translate the things in my head anymore. I just understand them-like I do with german words. And, team tea.

[@PassportTwo]

That is the goal, to finally reach the point where I am just thinking and speaking in German without translating just as I would English! Thanks for the thoughts 😊

[@arthur_p_dent]

Coffee. Except when I'm in the UK. Then tea. Also, congratulations. Since you mentioned cursing: It is important to keep in mind that a literal translation of a swear expression may be at a completely different level in a different language; an insult that is no big deal in one langauge may be a mortal, friendship-ending insult in another. Just the other day, the US President was in the news talking about a "stupid son of a b*tch" not realizing the mic was still on. In the German social media, this triggered a lot more discussion than it deserved, for this very reason: People complained that the media used the expression "Mistkerl", rather than "Hurensohn", which would have been the literal translation. (Of course always complaining about how the media are manipulating us, etc). What they failed to realize is that "son of a b*tch" really is a _far_ milder expression than the literal German translation - a word you should NEVER say to anyone, unless you really, REALLY want to trigger a bar fight.

[@rstrassburg]

“Doch” is one of the words that I miss most in English after having learned German. There’s no translation for it, and it’s so useful.

[@njs2311]

congrats on your big and beautiful news... and btw where else would you wear housshoes if not in the house? lol lol lol

[@Nikioko]

The German equivalent to "well" would be "na ja" or "nun ja". And the word "ja" is used to emphasize a fact or reason: "Das ist ja gerade das Problem." - "THAT is the whole problem."

[@holger_p]

The " .. as you already know ..." idea, is also not wrong.

[@juttalio1664]

Glückwunsch Euch beiden! Da wird wohl bald ein ganz neuer Videokontent auf uns zukommen! Ich freue mich für Euch als baldige Eltern. Kaffee am Morgen und Tee am Nachmittag und Abend.

[@sophiefricke5473]

Such am interesting video! And congratulations to you and Aubrey! ❤

[@gabak1292]

First of all:" Herzlichen Glückwunsch zum Baby"! And yes you will pick up more of the real meaning with time. You have to read books in german! I started reading in English with the Harry Potter Books😊 I just couldn't wait for the translation! I sat there with a dictionary and after that I bought the books in German just to make sure that I understood correctly 🤪!(That helped a lot!) After that I thought I was pretty proficient, till I tried to read another author! And that is exactly why you have to read books. At this point you start to pick up the essence of the text and all those small characteristics! You will look in the dictionary and know that this word doesn't fit the situation! By the way if you want to express... well, not really! In german that would be... Naja, nicht wirklich!

[@reinhard8053]

Yes to different authors. I read SF, fantasy and Harry Potter in English. I then started with Lord of the Rings and needed the dictionary multiple times for each page.

[@Kroyer102]

I went from A2 German to C1 German in about a year through intensive schooling but I had so much problem understanding everyday German. News reports and stuff like that I understood maybe only about 50%. But it got way better as I got German friends and after 5 years I can understand 95% of everything now. For me the best to improve was to notice and try to remember the typical reactions and phrases that my friends and others used in everyday situations then copy it. That way you will slowly build up your own library/personality speech. Edit after watching more: I know how bad each swear word is in my native language but I can't get that same level of feeling in German and it's made even worse by the fact that in my native language a very common swear word is the c-word equivalent in English, though I know how bad it is in English. But I use the German equivalent of the c-word more than normal Germans and every time I meet new Germans and talk in private they are shocked.

[@PassportTwo]

Ya, one thing everybody keeps stressing to me is to force myself into "living" in the language as much as possible by watching German TV, listening to German radio, etc. etc. because just because I have learned the language, it really requires lots and lots of practice in using it to get to the point where I fully understand it. Thanks for sharing your experience! 😊

[@JanineBrigitta]

The c-word? Strange I heard that c-word often in English comedy. Are the English more direct than the Americans?

[@alicemilne1444]

@@JanineBrigitta The English, the Scots, the Welsh and the Northern Irish are much less uptight about swearing in public than the Americans are, but it always depends on context. In formal situations and polite company, the c-word would be very out of place in the UK. Informally, however, it can range in meaning from insulting to affectionate.

[@Sascha-qs2eo]

@@PassportTwo Maybe you can try it with the very German tv show "Stromberg". It's the German version of "The Office" and full of phrases and hidden context and things like that and it's very funny (at least for my opinion).

[@manub.3847]

@@PassportTwo Recommendation: Heinz Erhardt (deceased 1979)--> you can also find many of his shows here on youtube. He was known for playing with the German language and became a well-known (as they say today) comedian. And to be honest, I find it easier to read/listen to English than to speak it.

[@GeGe-sn4eb]

I like both, coffee and tea. And all the best to you both on your journey to become parents. It is the most fulfilling experience you can have. And to get a glimpse of the meaning of the word "ja" added in a sentence it is kind of assuring you both that you both agree on the last subject and he is carrying on with his thought from a shared point of view. So he is comforting you with this shared ground and wants to create a situation where he can now come to more disputable subjects. In a trustworthy relationship you can comfortly follow his argumentation but if there are some doubts it can tend to be a little bit manipulative. So there is a positive and negative connotation to it, depending on the situation and your relationship to the other person.

[@Retro_Rainer]

congratz. funny for you to drop that info just now, as I was wondering at the beginning of this video if that might be the reason

[@marcellvogtlander2861]

Congratulations!! That very second, before you broke the news I was thinking to myself: Hope Aubrey is ok :) I was once at a restaurant with friends of my parents, who had moved to Australia 25 years earlier. They had moved when their kids were 3 and 6 or so, lived there ever since and were now back in Germany visiting family and friends. Conversation was mostly in German. Accidentally I dropped my fork and while bending down to retrieve it I dropped the f-word. Imagine the blank Australo-German faces I looked into when I came up from under the table. No reaction at all at my parents side of the table. That word in particular, I think, has seeped into German language through popular culture and has lost its bleepness.

[@Claus5871]

Hello Aubrey and Donnie, for your pregnancy: The Black Forest Family issued a video on giving birth in Germany a little while ago. Maybe you can even call them. Tea/Coffee: Hot cocolate, please :-) Even as 50yo. And it took some time what the yo means in that case.

[@laillabethm]

Congratulations to you guys :) btw I've already seen that in your Instagram stories ;) To the swearing topic: for me it is really easier to say "bad" words in a foreign language. Usually I don't use them in my mother tongue, but in German or English anytime anywhere... And last but not least: tee AND coffee :)

[@gorgoll]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch und alles Gute für euch!

[@tillposer]

Let me put this into perspective by changing the viewpoint: you are experiencing what countless Germans experience when talking to Anglophones. They, too, will miss the emotional resonances of words, phrases and idioms that are casually injected into the conversation. Given that a lot of humour in conversation in the UK and to a lesser degree the US depends on catching the nuances these resonances convey, a lot of the jokes whoosh right over the heads of said Germans. Combine that with a not untypical penchant to earnestly respond at face value that gives the Germans a reputation for being humourless. Now, everybody knows that Brits and Yanks are terrific at humour, so when a verbal queue whooshes over their heads, they don't get tarred with the same brush. After all, the wonder of the jesting German is not how wittily he jests, but that he jests at all.

[@renai7153]

I personally went to a private primary school that specifically focused on language and cultural diversity in Germany and was in the class that had Englisch since first grade and some French since third grade (don't speak French though).We had multiple classes that were held in both German and English like P.E., maths, music and art. I started reading English online and watching English youtubers because the German content just wasn't enough anymore. I don't know when I became fluent but I could definitely speak English very well in fifth grade and have been consuming mostly English media since then. I believe my understanding of "English-emotion" especially stems from the youtubers I've watched. BUT I did experience the sort of half understanding when learning Spanish in middle and highschool. There are just filler words or very specific topic-related ones that you just don't have in your vocabulary and if you don't or can't observe native speakers in especially a more comfortable setting the mannerisms and the way certain words can be used depending on the intonation will be basically impossible to understand. I believe it's completely normal to be good at understanding basic words but struggling with all of the stuff that native speakers throw into their sentences. Since you didn't learn German when you were a child and now don't have the magical ability of just soaking up the knowledge like those little gremlins do, it really just comes down to spending time with the language. Watching shows, KZbin, reading books, but I suppose you already do that. I believe if you continue the way you're learning right now you're definitely going to become more natural and comfortable with German in basically no time. Also, congrats on the little gremlin

[@micha_el_]

Oh, and coffee from waking up until 5-5:30 pm, tea after that until sleeping, but only from mid October until the beginning of March, when it changes to coffee all day.

[@say-kaj]

Congrats and happiness for you guys :) Yepp… still having trouble sometimes on writing the Anglo-saxxonian way… became better over the years, but still sometimes my writings are perceived harsh from the other side. It also heavily depends on how deep I dive in. Currently I live and work in a more German context, which makes it more difficult. Me consulting abroad in the past made it easier to feel the language around back than.

[@babakurazanna212]

Mrs Clarissa is legit and her method works like magic I keep on earning every single week with her new strategy

[@godwinokoko5592]

Wow I' m just shock someone mentioned expert Mrs Clarissa thought I' m the only one trading with her

[@godwinokoko5592]

She helped me recover what I lost trying to trade my self

[@HussainAahil]

expert Mrs Clarissa she's really amazing with an amazing skills she changed my 0.3btc to 2.1btc

[@Kasimdion1382]

I think I'm blessed because if not I wouldn't have met someone who is as spectacular as expert Mrs Clarissa I think she is the best broker I ever seen

[@yusifabdulhamid3773]

My first investment with Mrs Clarissa gave me profit of over $24,000 us dollars and ever since then she has never failed to deliver and I can even say she's the most sincere broker I have known

[@benjaminjakob1906]

Brilliant , Donny! Like everything, it’s a matter of years of practice and diving into a language until you really get the feeling for what people mean. Talking to other people every day helps a lot. You’ll only get that “feeling” by talking, not from reading. I really encourage all foreigners to try their German while staying with us. And I ask Germans to be patient and switch to slow and clear Hochdeutsch when they realise somebody is new. Congratulations to Aubrey and the young family! Wish you all the best!🍀 Coffee on workdays, tea at the weekend😊

[@micha_el_]

Oh wie aufregend! Herzlichen Glückwunsch, ich freue mich so! Alles Gute und Gottes Segen für euch🤩🍀🎉

[@frankmitchell3594]

I understand looking for verbal cues when speaking. I used to find it difficult to fully understand telephone conversations for that reason.

[@cmulliner8985]

Ach wie schön für euch! Hatte schon so eine Vermutung, dass Aubrey schwanger ist. Alles Gute für euch!

[@amayatsuki5673]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch! (Congratulations!) Sometimes figuring out the tone of messages it hard for me as well, both in German (native) and English (curren on B2 level). My worst enemy back when I started learning English were those false friends. And English slang wasn't easy at first as well. And for the hot drink question: hot chocolate! Or tea 🍵

[@Weizsaecker]

I'm a German native and just thought about the emotional message of "ja" and "doch". Though this video is about a year old I would like to share my thoughts. As you already mentioned "ja" in your gym example means "as you probably know" or "I'm sure you know, but just forgot". "doch" instead has a connotation of "I told you so many times". We would often pronounce "close" in this sentence "clohooose"😊

[@nikolajriedel7048]

i would like to add that because he spoke of the "feeling" that those words convey i also had the impression "ja" would add a slightly annoyed connotation to it. But then again, those words are definetely context depended and can absolutely change with the tone of you voice. And i think as a native speaker for the most part its nothing that we really think of or tend to overlook. Because words just have a certain feeling (like "soft" in the example).

[@Nashmark1]

Gaaaanz herzliche Glückwünsche and biggest congratulations to you two! I still remember the joy and happiness my wife and I felt when our children were "in the making". Enjoy!

[@emcotec1463]

As i watch this i thought about me learning english and that due to youtube videos especially trough streams where you can see the "raw,uncut" emotions of people helped me out a lot to really get a gripp for the feeling. So maybe watch some german twitch streams i guess. Also looking up slang words, whenever you hear them, is a big part of better immersing myself in the language.

[@chkoha6462]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch ihr drei!Sehr schöne Neuigkeiten an einen Freitag.

[@the3rddecline]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch zu eurem Baby! Ich wünsche euch alles Gute und eine möglichst angenehme Schwangerschaft für die werdende Mama! 😊 All the best to you guys!

[@PPfilmemacher]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch und ich wünsche eurer zukünftigen kleinen Familie fur die Zukunft alles Gute !!!!

[@klausmangelsdorff8225]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch und alles erdenklich Gute für euch

[@Chris-dy4zz]

Was eine freudige Nachricht. Euch Dreien alles Gute aus der Nachbarschaft

[@chrisk5651]

Congrats on the baby! You two are so so nice! The baby is so lucky to have such nice parents!

[@kleinerTerzling]

Coooollllll - das sind JA super Neuigkeiten! ;-) Ich freue mich für euch!

[@dansiegrist1728]

Coffee... and congratulations!! Very happy for you and Aubrey. :D

[@LasseJulius]

Oh wow, great video! I never thought about "problems" like that!

[@evamichaelis9455]

Very interesting subject! Well, I can say that I understand you perfectly - having started to study English as a second language 30 years ago. After numerous conversations, travels to English speaking countries and whatching A LOT of undubbed movies I feel confident using my second language. Be patient😊

[@j.b.5422]

9:13 is that where "pardon my french" comes from?

[@dasbertl]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch und auf alle Fälle Kaffee ;) My experience is a little different, maybe because i started learning english early and with US-TV and english written books (e.g. stephen king's dark tower saga) . I even feel english (or other foreign languages) better sometimes when i curse, but my favourite language for cursing is croatian, at least for spoken curses. My written curses are mostly in english, but maybe a native english speaking person maybe doesn't feel the same way i feel about that curse. Damn ;)

[@alexpawlowski2743]

Congrats..good news! The emotional difference results from the perspective. If the sentence with the weights is said without "yes" or "as you know", the addressed person is informed as an outsider (third person /without relationship). "So and so it is".... The "yes" involves the interlocutor as a knowing participant (friend) in the information. "As we both know it is so and so"...The use of this "fraternization" is more unconscious among friends or people with common issues. That is why it is authentic.

[@det999666]

You’re right on that feeling,connection thing. My UK colleagues reakted quite shocked at me try out some new course. Some wimps, anyhow. ;-)

Hey, thats soooo cool :-) Ich wünsche Euch allen Drei alles Liebe und Gute ! Zum Thema: Ja, das kenne ich in Englisch ähnlich. Das ist der Grund warum ich die ganzen Videos von Lucy, etsleepdream, letthemtalk etc. so gern sehe und vor allem höre. Ich habe nur keine Ahnung ob es analoge Videos auch zu Deutsch gibt.

[@bernhardkrickl3567]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch! Congratulations! I was really wondering why Aubrey didn't show up in the videos but that is the best possible reason :)

[@gregor-samsa]

Thx you provided a great insight: IMHO it depends on your thoughts. To be more precise depends if you consider to think (and dream) in English or German or you cannot differentiate. As you jumpstarted German without a decade long history this will settle over the years. I had similar confusion when i (German) spoke English in Paris being only 19 years old - when i was suddenly stressed after one week in language confusion.

[@ingwer55]

Was für eine schöne Überraschung-- Glückwünsche!!!

[@exliontamer]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch an Sie und Aubrey! wunderbare Neuigkeiten!

[@theycallme_nightmaster]

I'm experiencing some of this as well the more I get better at the language. I only figured out recently how to use "Na" in a sentence correctly haha (kinda hard when you are in the midwest USA)

[@theorganguy]

i would have liked to see more examples of where you feel "disconnected" to the "feel" - i thought the problems with e.g. txting in a foreign language would be the shortforms of words/phrases to cut down on character-count per msg

[@lissi3884]

Tolles Video! Ich glaube, den Ausdruck „well…“ kann man ganz gut durch „Also…“ ersetzen. Zumindest in dem Beispiel mit dem Film. Außerdem: Kaffee am Morgen und Tee am Abend (Schwarztee!!) aber die Liebe zu Tee geht tiefer 😍 Und natürlich noch Herzlichen Glückwunsch 🎉

[@michaelkloters3454]

Congratulation !!! I´m glad for you! ( in case you didn´t watch yet, Ashton from the Black Forest Family has a video with many advices about her pregnancy in Germany!) Best wishes from Hannover to Passport three. Michael

[@PassportTwo]

Danke danke! 😊

[@alexkoenig84]

the swearing thing is spot on ! I almost never swear in my mother tongue (the last time I used vulgar expletive was more than 30 years ago). Even though I can feel the nuances in the foreign languages that I'm speaking now, the weight is by far not as great as that in my mother tongue, and that makes it A LOT easier to swear without having much guilty feeling.

[@rzuue]

With English I didn’t experience these things much, though sometimes in movies I miss sentences when they’re talking quieter or in a dialect I am not familiar with. But I’ve also been learning Korean for 3 and a half years and let me tell you, it’s still so incredibly difficult. I am also missing the emotional resonance and tony, easy replies, but at the same time I can write and read texts about job search or recycling. Learning a language is really more than just the words and just takes a lot of time.

[@Duconi]

I have the same problem with English but actually also a bit with German. Emotions aren't well transported through written text and as I am a very rational thinking person I often underestimate the emotions behind written sentences.

[@Mamaki1987]

Herzlichen Glückwunsch euch :-) To answer your question. Yes, when I curse in English, I do feel different. I don't know if "less" is the right term for it. When I know the person I speak to knows English, I sometimes I interject English phrases to get across my feelings when I think, it helps. Especially some fitting quotes from my favourite TV shows and things like that. I drink both coffee and tea, but I do prefer coffee tbh.

[@oliverbergfeld1606]

Congrats and all the best for parenthood! BTW you might want to read Das Perfume in German, because there are plenty of expressions that convey feelings well

[@lenab5266]

First, congratulations and all the best for you three! Now for the actual topic of the video. I can totally relate on that. Just two weeks ago I wrote a comment here on youtube in English in which I criticised some things in the video. The creator answerd and seemed pretty offended by my comment even tho i didn't mean to do so. After reading my own comment again I realised it really sounded kind of rude and apologised for that. I just had no clue how to express it less harsh but still comprehensible. I simply do not know where to put the "fillers" and how I have to structure the sentence then. And sometimes I just don't know the "softer" word for something. As for cursing, I almost exclusively curse in English. Probably because it doesn't really feel like cursing. I am totally team coffee. Tea only in the wintertime or when I a sick.

[@kurtfw4581]

Alles Gute und herzliche Glückwünsche!

[@danielweintraub270]

Congratulations! And thanks for an excellent video. I am having the same struggles trying to learn German. Stupid modal particles!

[@Ati-MarcusS]

Glückwunsch ihr beiden,wünsche euch alles Gute