Why “No Problem” Can Seem Rude: Phatic Expressions

[@TomScottGo]

I've hedged my bets as best I can with the US/UK comparisons here: but your experiences may well be different! That's, uh, kind of the point.

[@neongooroo]

5 days ago? Nice. Video is just out

[@abhishekthorat3631]

Sir how's the comment 5 days ago by the way fantastic video and keep making new videos always inspired me

[@jasminejackson3485]

5 days ago 😂

[@YetAnotherAaron]

@@neongooroo video's are usually uploaded before the release date. then made public

[@neongooroo]

@@YetAnotherAaron I know, it just looked funny when I opened the video and the only comment here was 5 days ago.

[@supermarc]

I've also noticed that whenever I accidentally enter a wrong building or room, "Can I help you?" usually means "What are you doing here please leave immediately."

[@Danzignan]

XD so true

[@bobtheduck]

Just say "Oh, yes. Thank you" and hand them any heavy objects you're carrying.

[@itsaUSBline]

You can usually tell based on intonation in that case.

[@Johngeorge479]

An example of pragmatics where what is said explicitly has an implied meaning and purpose. This is usually used to be polite and save face.

[@grahamlive]

Whenever anyone asks me "can I help you?". I reply " I'm beyond help" and walk away slowly with a sinister glare in my eye. It really unsettles people for some reason.

[@cuaroz5808]

Life hack: Instead of worrying about wether you're supposed to say "No problem" or "You're welcome" after someone has thanked you, simply reply "Indeed" so everyone thinks you're cold and rude

[@edgeisloveedgeislife5439]

Thanks for the life hack!

[@ryledra6372]

Or conversely, say thank-you back and everyone can think you're a moron :)

[@Deathnotefan97]

Advanced Life Hack: Instead of responding with a phatic expression, simply release a high-pitched screech directly into people's ears They will eventually stop talking to you, then you don't have to worry about language at all

[@jamesgrimwood1285]

You can also obliterate any form of gratitude by adding a word like "expected". "Sorry I'm late" "Indeed, I expected you to be"

[@calvinnyala9580]

@@jamesgrimwood1285 I don't know why i feel being called out, but i do not like that sentences.

[@Donutlover]

Imagine if acknowledgements were more literal. "Hello!" "I understand that you exist."

[@thesupperdud4432]

Underrated comment

[@ericpan601]

literally dwight

[@kaiceecrane3884]

That would be refreshing and preferable

[@alveolate]

the appropriate response to that response is... k.

[@ZippyBobo]

In anishinaabemowin we have the greeting aaniin which translates to "I see you're light". Most words in the language describe things quite literally, most notably our word for blueberry pie, miinibaashkiminasiganibiitooyingwesijiganibakwezhigan, when translated means "blueberry sauce that is put between two layers of bread that face each other".

[@Thelocalpsychopath]

I mean, Gandalf definitely knew what "good morning" meant, he was just having a bit of fun. Not only that, he was also testing out Bilbo's personality by his responses, to see if he was the adventurous Tookish hobbit Gandalf needed.

[@tuluppampam]

There's also the fact that Tolkien, as a linguist and conlanger, wanted to just make this sage say strange things It happened another time, with I don't remember who asking "You're a burglar, go burgle"

[@MarloTheBlueberry]

burgle

[@nottechytutorials]

I thought Tom was going to explain how Gandalf was not actually serious and did know what good morning meant, but alas, he did not.

[@tiannagraham5210]

i like “no problem” or “of course” because when i’m helping someone, it’s meant to let them know that me helping them isn’t a burden

[@pablorazo7599]

One thing I've learned is that 'no problem' can come off as selfish. In your example of helping someone, saying no problem means that I only helped because it doesn't take a toll on me either financially, timewise, and or effort wise. You can be seen as someone who only helps when it's convenient, perhaps selfish. That's why you'll hear people say "of course" or "my pleasure".

[@loganbritton6737]

@@pablorazo7599 I have the complete opposite feeling. "No problem" is much more humble and polite. You're expressing that helping the other person should either simply be the default reaction, or a pleasure. Whereas something like "You're welcome" comes off as haughty and selfish. I'm granting you my help and you should be thankful that I went out of my way to do so.

[@DuncanWanyoike]

@@loganbritton6737 i prefere your welcome because its normal no problem sounds rude

[@anafu-sankanashi8933]

@@DuncanWanyoike I prefer no problem because it's normal you're welcome sounds rude

[@kiaz1st]

@@pablorazo7599 I mean if anyone ever gives me help I don’t want it to take any toll on them. I would much rather sort something simple out on my own without help if it was going to cause a problem for the person helping, so if the help is genuinely ‘no problem’ I feel a lot better about receiving it. (And this is reversed as well, I don’t want someone to think they are bothering me with asking for help, and I don’t want anyone to ever feel like they owe me something for my help. My assistance is always no problem and second nature, it shouldn’t be thought as if it means anything more than that.)

[@pleepler]

Just mix it up and use "You're problem" There, all generations are happy now.

[@nothda2211]

Alternatively, you can use "No welcome"

[@Pokemonleafmon]

Genius

[@LittleWhole]

All of you guys in this thread made my day

[@pleepler]

@@LittleWhole Shut up boomer

[@Lattamonsteri]

@@pleepler you're welcome

[@liz2571]

As an American, there is a jarring difference between "sure" and "fine". One is saying yes casually, the other feels like you are accepting something you dont want

[@PissyPants111]

I can agree with that

[@startedtech]

Yep. Saying 'fine' is just begrudgingly accepting something/agreeing. (For any non-americans, this isn't the case if you respond to "How are you" with "Oh, I'm fine")

[@pootzeketzi1233]

@yeetosaurus How about referring to the weather, "What a fine day"

[@foodank_atr817]

A lot of meaning is conveyed in how one _speaks_ the word, fine.

[@jeff-ramos]

"Sure" almost always sounds sarcastic and rude, even from the people who use it so often that I know they're most likely just plain agreeing with me (as they seem to do quite heavily in Indian culture). Sure, Jan... 🙄

[@zoinksscoop20yearsago68]

I remember reuniting with a friend and telling them "You alright.?" as a greeting after not seeing eachother for like months and they just stopped on their tracks, tilted their head, raised an eyebrow and said "Nothing bad happened... what do you mean?" with the most confused look I've ever seen. And I've never felt so lost in my entire life. Like my consciousness left my body while trying to figure what the hell that meant.

[@tysfalsehood]

As someone (A Canadian) who doesn’t hear the word used much as a greeting, I would probably interpret it as “You look sad, what is wrong?”. In which case my insecurity of my resting face would go through the roof and Id immediately try to express that I’m actually alright.

[@TPNsBiggestFan]

@@tysfalsehood i’m scottish but since i’m on social media a lot i’m used to more american implications (in terms of wording) i guess- sorry i’m not great at explaining things- so now i’ve ended up with a weird mush of the two, so when i’m watching tom’s videos about topics similar to these i never really know if i’m gonna get or not get the american/british implication/phrase i took so long to type that i’ve forgotten why i even thought to respond with this DID I EVEN MAKE SENSE?

[@dreamcore]

how britbongs and brazilians are alike

[@moos5221]

"You alright?" is something I'd ask someone crawling out of a crashed car. In my understanding (I'm german) it much more implies that I think the other person is NOT alright then any kind of "How are you?" ever would. So I'd beconfused being asked that question aswell, unless I just tripped and faceplanted in front of the person asking the question.

[@stratonikisporcia8630]

Never happened to me because: - I understand the ambiguity of that phrase - I'm French - I don't have friends

[@KarateStereo]

The funny thing is, in Australia “You alright!?” can sometimes mean something like “Are you insane!?” so when I met some Brits while I was travelling I’d thought I done something wrong.

[@RJRJ]

It's the same in England, just depends on tone, speed and the amount of contraction. A chirpy "a'RIGHT mate?" with stress on right is a hello, but a slower more perplexed "are you alright mate?" is a question of concern. In the latter, there's no stress on "al" or "right" but each word is carefully enunciated showing that the sentence as a whole is important to the meaning they're trying to convey and not just one word. "How ya doin?" is chirpy and spoken fast, so you can tell that they're not really asking a question and that it's a greeting. If someone says "How are you doing?" slowly, it means they're actually asking how you are doing.

[@KarateStereo]

lWALSHl Language is so fascinating. Thanks for the explanation.

[@bcubed72]

"You alright?" is what the bartender says to you, when you've had one too many, and are just beginning to act odd.

[@guilhermesartorato93]

Same happens in (some States of) Brazil - and we English isn't even our official language.

[@Ricky911_]

It's the same in the UK. It just depends on the context and the tone used.

[@eseguerito2629]

Solution: reply with “aaaaaye” and fingerguns so you’re hated in both conutries simultaneously.

[@dragonfire7354]

So THAT'S my problem! I can't stop the finger guns at this point. It's gone too far.

[@poopsiepop4179]

And add a tsk tsk at the end

[@blankname3816]

Loved**

[@Greenhourglass]

are you kidding, any time someone does that theyre cooler than I could ever hope to be or anyone I could ever hope to be friends with

[@clockworkkirlia7475]

To a middle-aged Glaswegian, you've just responded with a thoughtful "yeeessss" and acknowledged their point in a rude but direct way by pointing at them.

[@michaeljpatrick]

At my work we are REQUIRED to ask every customer, "What brings you in today?" They almost invariably answer, "Fine thanks!"

[@IsomerMashups]

Waiter: Enjoy your meal. Me: Thanks. You, too.

[@sauercrowder]

"Hi how are you" "I'm just browsing"

[@ss-nz5sr]

I hate when someone approaches me in a store and I don't have ny idea why they tell workers to do this. I see you standing there, I'm looking around if I need something I will walk up to you and ask you.

[@JenamDrag0n]

@@ss-nz5sr Not everyone will do so though. I'm the kind of person where if I go into the store and have trouble finding something, I almost NEVER go find a store attendant to ask if they have it or where it would be. However, if I do happen to run into one who asks me if I'm finding everything okay, then I usually take advantage of the offer. It's the store's way of trying to check in with their potential customers and satisfy their needs because they want you to be successful in buying something from them.

[@sethr.c1065]

“Will you be dining in or carrying out?” “Good, good. I’ll have uhhhh.”

[@boristherock8279]

I find "Greetings Earthling" suits all occasions and continents. One can easily substitute Mars, Mercury or Jupiter when travelling between planets

[@abigcupofwater]

"Greetings, Jupiter"

[@jamesjohnXII]

"Greetings, Mercuryling"

[@tOSdude]

I mean, if there’s nobody else there who else are you two gonna talk to?

[@organa1626]

Keeping this in mind for when I visit my Martian aunt this Christmas

[@fisch37]

That diminutive might make it seem rude

[@robertdavis1783]

I have a hierarchy of responses to “thank you,” depending on how much effort the task was. “No problems” or “no worries” for when it’s no big deal, “you’re welcome,” when it was a lot of effort but it’s fine, and *silence* when it was a lot of effort and I’m pissed I had to do it.

[@heaventohades]

tasks you dont want to do have you thinking "Well you're NOT welcome. EVER AGAIN."

[@koenahn]

I'm personally a big fan of "my pleasure"

[@reginaldforthright805]

I just grunt.

[@koenahn]

@@reginaldforthright805 Ah! The universal sign of acknowledgement

[@brandenward3730]

Thank you, this is how my brain works

[@ss-nz5sr]

Two Brits meet eachother 1:"You aite?" 2"Hi, you aite mate? " Both walk away without answering the question

[@danielrodrigues4903]

Living in London rn and I'm still trying to wrap my head around this 😖

[@meetaverma8372]

Does that really happen?

[@itzimperiumxvi2620]

Meeta Verma yep and it extends all across England instead of just London

[@chunkylefunga]

Nah it's usually. 1:"You aite?" 2"yeah, you aite mate? "

[@Leto_0]

America seems to be halfway between the cultures that prefer to have their phatic expressions make sense and the ones that prefer to save time and acknowledge that the real message is the emotion and not the words.

[@Soandnb]

"No problem." "That's kinda rude tbh" "One problem."

[@geelee1977]

Texan: "No problem." Brit: "That's kinda rude tbh" Texan: "I'm sorry Lil' Miss Namby Pamby Pants"

[@cooldude2251]

"No problem" "That's kinda rude tbh" "I'm sorry, the person you are attempting to reach has already left the chat."

[@marsx5886]

@Curf think it's literally because you didn't say you're welcome, which they'd see as the appropriate answer to a thank you

[@bodyofhope]

@Curf often ppl of a certain age (Baby Boomers and older) expect traditional, respectful responses... more formal responses. You're Welcome, or My Pleasure for example. Overly casual responses like No Worries, No Problem, or Any time! aren't considered traditional, so they may feel like it's a sign of disrespect. I don't want to make someone feel uncomfortable especially if they're saying Thank You, so I try to base my response on age. But "My Pleasure" or "I'm happy I could help" seems to work well for every age.

[@rootbeer_666]

@@bodyofhope my understanding is that boomers think of “you’re welcome” as proper response because “I put in this effort so you _should_ be grateful”; younger folks think “no problem” fits better as a “no big deal, I’m happy to help” kind of meaning, but older folks see that as a signal that not much thought or effort was put into undertaking the favor I definitely agree that “my pleasure/happy to help” serves as a nice catch-all for all ages

[@ct6947]

As an Australian living in the UK I can confirm how confusing "you all right?" is as as greeting. It took me way longer than it should have to realise it was just a casual greeting. I thought I must have been looking lost, confused or upset a lot of the time and everyone around me was concerned. Turns out they were just saying hello.

[@ajs41]

One clue is that it doesn't really have a question mark at the end. It's "you all right" not "you all right?" if you listen carefully.

[@SixofQueens]

I actually use "no problem" and "you're welcome" to imply different things, though how much it is perceived by the listener I don't know. When I use "no problem", I am literally implying that sentiment, that the action I took to elicit a "thank you" wasn't an issue for me to accomplish, thereby meaning to alleviate burden from the person thanking me. If I do choose to use the phrase "you're welcome", I am implying that I did need to go out of my way to accomplish the task requested of me, and that I feel the gratitude is warranted.

[@trajectoryunown]

For me it's similar. It usually depends on how long I worked on something, how much effort I put into it, and who I performed the task for. I am, however, not very consistent.

[@jyrolys6]

@@trajectoryunown I always looked at "you're welcome" as a form of expressing the favor not being much of a hassle, as in the person is welcome to ask something similar without much discomfort. At least among people who don't use phatic expressions much.

[@TopOfAllWorlds]

I do the same thing. I use your welcome as a way to give myself more credit if I feel like I went out of my way enough.

[@saraweston3120]

I agree with this. I also think this might be why different generations use them differently - younger people (in my experience) ask for help less and feel like more of a burden when they do so, so when they thank people they want to be told that they don't need to feel that burden. Older people already assume they're entitled to your time, especially if you're some kind of retail or service worker, so they want to hear something that implies you're always available to them, in line with that entitlement e.g. you're welcome to take as much of my time as you need. Older people don't feel the burden in asking for help so saying "no problem" sounds rude because you're bringing up the fact that it could've been a problem for you.

[@Livestreamlurker]

For me, if it was of little issue, then I'll just say, "yup." And if it was somewhat of issue then I'll say, "no problem."

[@bob_._.]

Always interesting when Tom puts his Linguistics degree to use.

[@Marco_Onyxheart]

Fun thing, linguistics can be very applicable in computer science, which is what many of his videos are about. Noam Chomsky, a linguist by education, is kind of respected in computer and information technology. He's done some very important work.

[@tearlach47]

@@Marco_Onyxheart I'm a comp sci major and linguistics minor at uni atm, though am thinking heavily about interchanging the two.

[@taasinbinhossainalvi9173]

Marco Meijer can you recommend me some contents from Noam Chomsky regarding Computer Science?

[@ThePharphis]

I don't know Chomsky's work myself, but one thing I did learn about that had his name on it was Chomsky Normal Form, of a context-free grammar. So, check out context-free grammars would be my mostly naive advice. The stuff I learned wasn't very complicated, and was a stepping stone to learning about Turing machines and Turing languages

[@NukaPlaysGames]

A lot of this video concerns conversation analysis, which leans more towards sociology than linguistics although they are v interchangable

[@5uper5kill3rz]

I usually say “no worries” in reply to thank you but occasionally someone will say “I’m not worried” and they’re completely on a different wave length to what I mean

[@p_rry]

I like “happy to help”

[@moss.kurtis]

@@p_rryagreed

[@DannoFZ1]

"My pleasure!" is my favorite reply

[@illosovic]

@@DannoFZ1 found the chicken worker

[@IlaMedlin]

@@DannoFZ1 on the other hand, it makes me, personally, literally nauseated and uncomfortable when someone says “my pleasure,” when they mean “you’re welcome.” To each their own, just be happy to be correctable for individuals in your own life.

[@JoshSaysStuff]

When I was teaching in Japan, I had a few British friends. One of them kept greeting me with “You alright?”, and at the time I had no idea it was a phatic expression. I just kept replying with an honest evaluation of my mood. Looking back, I’m a bit embarrassed but mostly amused.

[@rachelcookie321]

This is what I did when people started saying “how are you?” to me. As a little kid no one ever asked me that, people why just great with a “hello” or a “hi”. So I thought when people asked you “how are you?” they were genuinely asking how you are. Obviously you’re not going to tell a cashier your life story and will probably give a basic response but when a friend said it, I thought it was meant to be a segue into conversation. They ask “how are you?” then you talk about how your life has been for the last few days or weeks or however long and it starts a conversation. So when people started asking me “how are you?” when I was about 12, I answered genuinely. The same happened with “what’s up?”

[@mandelorean6243]

@@rachelcookie321 what? I tell cashiers my life story all the time

[@jotarokujo443]

@@rachelcookie321 I still often answer genuinely. I know it's phatic but socialising is confusing

[@pluggedfinn-bj3hn]

​@@jotarokujo443Yeah same, and when I say it myself, I don't mean it as phatic, and am actually interested in how they're feeling. Get a bit disappointed when I get a non-answer.. Have started using "How's your day going?" instead. But I'm not native English speaker, asking someone how they are and expecting them to just answer a standard answer feels rude. It feels like I'd be pressuring them to hide their bad feelings.

[@trustytrest]

I had that before too, as an American around other Americans. Doesn't help that I met the bugger while having a health crisis of internal bleeding. I genuinely kept thinking he was seeing if I was recovering, but nope he didn't care, he was just bugging people at random.

[@junechevalier]

In Indonesia, "where are you going?" is usually used as a greeting like "how are you," it could potentially unsettle some tourists like "where are you going mister?" "Uhhh none of your business?" 😂

[@chrishill601]

What's the default response?

[@royce957]

i want to know too, what is the phatic reply to a phatic "where are you going?" "onward?" "away?" "down the only road i've ever known?"

[@ZXZZ66_]

@@royce957 the default answer is usually "kesana" and "ngak ada" which can be translated as "onward" or "right there" and "nothing". Now that someone mentioned it... Indonesian phatic is sure weirder than english phatic... Smh

[@royce957]

@@ZXZZ66_ this is super cool. i really like it. "where you going?" "onward/right there/nowhere" i really, really like it. thanks for sharing! :D

[@runa2604]

I think this is the case in India too! Like imagine a market setting and you spot someone you know instead of "Hello" you'd say where are you going (kaha jaa rahe ho?/kaha nikle?) And the response would just be a vague "Just here" (bas yahi) or sometimes even nowhere (kahi nahi) 😂😂 as i write i this i realise how stupid this sounds

[@spoopythedoopy8411]

As a Texan I find the concept of “howdy” sounding formal to be hilarious

[@rosecolouredworld]

howdy fella 🤠

[@Kyrelel]

Howdy has been considered Formal And Informal since inception :/ If you just say it, it's informal if you touch your hat whilst saying it, it's formal. Surely a Texan would know this?!

[@spoopythedoopy8411]

@@Kyrelel U rite. It was late when I wrote this so I forgot about my hat mannerisms.

[@ihatecocomelon3839]

@@spoopythedoopy8411 of course ya cant forget to slap your loyal horse’s ass if ya be polite whilst saying howdy. tsk tsk

[@fireflygaming8764]

Same.

[@shootinbruin3614]

Imagine a culture in which the use of “howdy” is seen as overly formal haha

[@mychemicalbromance97]

I swear I have other Americans confused when I say howdy

[@zeltzamer4010]

@@mychemicalbromance97 That's because it's more quaint than anything else.

[@ActuallyRocatex]

Hollywood killed Cowboys by making the "southern slang" oversaturated

[@kepone3121]

@@ActuallyRocatex start saying how do you do again and restart the process

[@bobvilla2508]

Roland Owen my name is sue, how do you do!

[@sterling9314]

When someone says “thank you”, respond with a straight face and a quick but firm single head nod. This not only acknowledges the thanks in a neutral and polite way, but establishes you as slightly more badass than everyone else in the room.

[@AngelCaz7]

period

[@splicerbabe]

This is what I do. Mmhm and nod my head. People be way too sensitive. I’m helping you, be happy. I didn’t say no, that would be rude.

[@frederikbrandt424]

@@splicerbabe No. Only men do the head nod

[@bananasinfrench]

Bonus points if you're wearing sunglasses

[@SweeteaDove]

If I don't say anything to my parents, I get in trouble

[@nlabonte]

Galdalf's super-pedantic parsing of the phrase "good morning" makes a lot more sense when you realize that Tolkien was a linguistics professor.

[@chrisrynn1]

... and that Gandalf was high.

[@rezaka116]

A wizard who lived for 3000 would be fed up with hearing "Good Morning" every single day. That's 1095000 good mornings

[@YataTheFifteenth]

_why did you even count that_

[@mateovazquez6685]

You're not considering that not all years have 365 days.

[@fraserwatsn]

@@mateovazquez6685 wow 😭 truth

[@theextremes1981]

If you include leap years then, 1,095,750 days of good morning

[@eelkezuidhoek3865]

This is exactly why I always wake up in the afternoon

[@axelkusanagi4139]

"What's good?" Becomes decidedly philosophical without semantics.

[@MrScorpianwarrior]

Haha! I read this and I was like "... what?". It took me a minute to process and when I did I actually laughed out loud in an empty room.

[@pianopianist5709]

Someone explain

[@markimoss9890]

Omg my sister says 'whats good' all the time and I never know how to respond BC saying 'not much' seems really pessimistic

[@seg162]

"What's REALLY good?"

[@odw32]

@@thedocilefish "So, what's up?" -- "Atmosphere, birds, some clouds, the universe..." "Nah, I mean what's good?" -- "Well, I see value in utilitarian hedonism, maximizing the total pleasure and happiness of many people..." "Ugh. But how is it going?!?" -- "This train? Well I guess it goes by using electric motors to apply force to the wheels..." "Can't you just tell me how you're doing?" -- "How I'm doing what? Breathing? Talking?" -- "I JUST WANT TO KNOW, HOW ARE YOU!?!?" -- "Now you're asking me to explain my own existence...?"

[@Iamtk777]

I feel like "no problem" is, to a lot of younger people, not really phatic at all. It *is* meant to communicate semantically, by saying that the effort required and the inconvenience placed upon us was not a problem. That is, that we weren't bothered. As many others have mentioned, this is because, as a generation, we are fearful of causing inconvenience, so we want to be clear that others have not caused it to us, so as to avoid them feeling guilty.

[@lunarluxe9832]

well said

[@ferretyluv]

I haven’t said “no problem” in a long time just out of habit. I work with kids and teach them manners so I say “thank you” and “you’re welcome” to them all the time. Now it’s become a habit with me. I don’t know if that means I’ve become old or what.

[@Iamtk777]

@@ferretyluv It just means you've taught yourself a different habit.

[@StamfordBridge]

No, not the case. The reason older people often find “No problem” obnoxious is because young people often use it in cases where it’s inappropriate to say “It’s not really much effort on my part.” For example, a boss calls in an employee to reprimand them for something and the boss starts off with “Thank you for coming,” saying so in a serious tone. Then the young employee says, “No problem,” sounding to the boss like an entitled, classless twerp. The reason there is this age discrepancy is that young people ARE using “No problem” phatically, and both sides misread the other’s signals.

[@angustheterrible3149]

​@@StamfordBridgedon't be such a wet lettuce.

[@matrixphijr]

Solution: Just combine the two! "No welcome!" "You're* problem!"

[@PrettyGuardian]

*you are problem

[@naruhoedou4709]

_how are goodbye_

[@Akhimed]

And now you are hated everywhere, at least they understand.

[@FeeeebleVT]

I've legit said "your problem" once and it has stuck with me ever since

[@Akhimed]

@@FeeeebleVT I sometimes say Excuse You instead of Excuse Me

[@juneguts]

I'm very happy that you've started this back up again, Tom.

[@actual_tangerine]

ToNi me too!!!

[@alexsnell1925]

Dominik from 22d and me

[@mahraba874]

I binged the whole thing a while ago, love it.

[@CoolisKid]

ToNi how I found and subscribed to his channel was cuz of his linguistics vids

[@Envy_May]

mmm

[@givecamichips]

I like the phrase "It goes" in response to "How's it going?" It implies no mood, just an acknowledgement that life continues.

[@givecamichips]

Oh hey, that's a calque from the French «ça va» (I think).

[@TheN00bPolice]

In Yorkshire, we say “not so bad, ta” in reply to “how’s it going?” it’s neither bad nor good, and gives away no emotional state.

[@givecamichips]

@@TheN00bPolice Well, the thing about saying "Not bad," is that it still implies that the asker was genuinely asking your mood.

[@givecamichips]

And "Not bad" absolutely conveys mood. If you aren't feeling good, then you're not telling the truth.

[@allentom97]

(From UK) if I heard someone say “it goes” to that I would assume they are having a bad/busy day.

[@Fogmeister]

Interviewer: what’s you biggest weakness? Me: understanding the semantics of questions but not always the pragmatics. Interviewer: interesting, can you give us an example? Me: yes

[@ellotheearthling]

Wait that’s a phatic expression?

[@Fogmeister]

@@ellotheearthling no, it just came to mind while I was watching this and I thought it was funny enough to share. 😊

[@oblio125]

My ex always felt that if I said "no problem" to her, what I was really trying to convey was that it was a problem. This became a problem, hence the "ex".

[@wheeliebin1791]

I don't even get this because it's "NO problem," not "yes problem". Like that's the whole point of the saying 😂

[@zombiesxaliens]

@@wheeliebin1791 Right! "No problem!" = "that does not inconvenience me, I am glad to do it"

[@ACasualCustomer]

@@zombiesxaliens the things is why even say the word "problem". I feel like it's better to keep the whole vibe positive

[@Kanyon85]

@@ACasualCustomer Maybe, but that whole thing falls apart when, lets say it comes to giving someone your opinion on something they did, and you say "Not bad!" as a positive critique. That's why the "no problem" phrase should feel completely fine. Because if its all about keeping positive words then why don't people take offense to being told their performance was "not bad"? Just a rhetorical, of course. There is no concrete answer, and everyone will use what they prefer, and that's fine.

[@r.h.w.1776]

@@ACasualCustomer It’s a double negative which is positive. I see your point but to many they recognize it as positive.

[@JimPlaysGames]

"Fly you fools!" "Gandalf, when you say fly do you mean we should literally fly as in summon some giant eagles, or do you mean it in the sense of moving quickly, as in run away?"

[@RainaRamsay]

XD

[@oldvlognewtricks]

Frodo's trousers were undone.

[@iang0th]

"All of them at once!"

[@RobGodMC]

"Or is it rather you warning us about a swarm of flies?"

[@NoNameAtAll2]

I still think russian translation that changed it to "run" made a lot more sense

[@wuliajeber]

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard, and a German log on to a zoom call. The host wants to check that his video is working, so they ask: "Can you see me?" The Englishman says "Yes" The Frenchman says "Oui" The Spaniard says "Sí" and the German says "Ja"

[@PandaMan-xy1he]

Oh god. That took me a solid couple minutes to get.

[@starrise_]

I don't get it QwQ

[@Munomanom]

@@starrise_ say all the responses in a row...

[@starrise_]

@@Munomanom Ohhh!! Amazing

[@NineEyeRon]

Sensible chuckle

[@Mooneymanjason]

"No problem" to me is the assurance that the thanker hasn't caused me trouble or tedium, and it's entry into the common language could mean that younger people tend to worry more about becoming a burden than whether or not they have continued access to someone else's help (as "you're welcome" implies)

[@klutterkicker]

Me: Howdy Tom: No need to be so formal.

[@agoatmannameddesire8856]

Right? I’m only in my mid-30s :/

[@edi9892]

Way better than the German _Tach ihr Säcke!_ (= G´day you scumbags) (don´t use it at all in German, unless you are among edgy teens or alcoholic dropouts)

[@marcblum5348]

(As a German) I still struggle to start a work conversation with an American colleague starting "How are you?". We Germans love to rant on how we do NOT feel well. :-)))

[@charlottejameson8924]

I agree, but it's part of learning the language to give the expected response.

[@deleqtronica8733]

You should just start every conversation with “Greetings my American colleagues”

[@AlexStefanOnline]

Same, same! I'm Romanian. Every time a British colleague asks me You alright? I start going on about how I had a headache the entire weekend, thanks for noticing! It gets me EVERY TIME. I've been living in the UK for 2 years. If you'd ask the same thing in Romanian (How are you? or You alright?), you'd be genuinely interested in what's going on with the person. :)))

[@sbp4215]

damn this makes me want to speak german (or romanian)

[@microcosmreefer8340]

As an American I still struggle with this in the morning...

[@smallpox9254]

Whenever someone asks me, "How are you?" I reply, "High", but they think I'm saying "Hi". I've been doing it for years. No one's ever gotten the joke.

[@sparklypri]

🤣🤣

[@IrvingIV]

It's like those jokes in homestuck about how people are saying rufio/rufioh wrong. "You're spelling it wrong" "I'm talking, how can you possibly know how I spell his name when you can just hear my voice?!"

[@eleSDSU]

I have been saying "Silla" (Chair) instead of "Cya" for years now too, 3 people got it :) Clarification: most people speak Spanish and English here.

[@dysmaruuramsyd3233]

@@IrvingIV Damn, people still read Homestuck? I'm impressed.

[@funstuff81girl]

How are you?

[@jonreededworthy7518]

When I worked in hospitality, I did switch between saying “you’re welcome” and “no problem/no worries” depending on the customers’ age

[@Hollowhalf17]

I never would have thought of “what’s up” like that, but the “you alright” example literally explained it perfectly

[@Chomuggaacapri]

You must be from the UK then haha. I’m from the US and it’s the exact opposite.

[@chelsey8737]

Same. You alright is genuinely concerned. If I got a text saying "you alright?" its the same as "you good?" I'd understand that you were asking how I am but it would seem weirdly sincere

[@MoonlightFox]

"what's up" can be interchangable with "what's the matter?" or "what's wrong?" It's very odd to hear it right at the beginning of a sentence to me. a typical use might be: "Hi, how are you?" "ehhh.. I've been better." "oh. what's up?"

[@ontley]

y'aight?

[@burke615]

@@ontley 'Sup?

[@chamaeleont]

I'm not a native English speaker, so when going to England to study at university I kept actually answering to "how are you?" and "you alright?" and it was like the language equivalent of fist bumping into a handshake. "Hello" "Yes" And the opposite, when coming into the kitchen and wanting to know how my housemate's day was and getting "Hi" as the response. (And quite amusing that attending university lectures and reading course work was fine, yet trying to say hi to a housemate in the kitchen was like an obstacle course.)

[@tdoge]

In these situations I'm not sure whether to call it a language barrier or a cultural barrier or both

[@bjornolson6527]

The setting, and relationship, matters.

[@JKenny44]

Sometimes I take those greetings as actual questions and answer them. Other times I just say some greeting back I thought that was normal enough I am a native English speaker, atleast you have a good excuse

[@disorganizedorg]

@@JKenny44 My usual reply to "How are you?" is "Fine, thanks. Yourself?" - neither party is actually asking, and both express themselves in the form of a question. It serves the purpose of establishing that both parties are listening and mutually intelligible... as stated, the pragmatic meaning.

[@haph2087]

ShroudedPanda Language is a part of culture.

[@AnthemTD]

I started saying “it’s my pleasure” and “any time” instead of “you’re welcome” and “no problem” to avoid the disagreement on which is proper. They’ve served me well. I use any time more for work or for close friends and family because I literally mean that I would help them with what they needed any time they would ask.

[@Skellybeans]

People ask me "Hey, how are ya?" I just say "Hello" and they comment "That's good" Phatic expressions are weird

[@wolftamerwolfcorp7465]

If someone did that to me, I’d stop in my tracks and calculate the next course of action personally.

[@Queer_Nerd_For_Human_Justice]

That's like bumping into a mannequin and apologizing.

[@captainoblivious_yt]

Sometimes i read too deep into things like "How's it going" and i just stop to think "Hmm, how is it going?... How is WHAT going?"

[@UngodlyFreak]

@@captainoblivious_yt "How do you do?" "How do I do what?"

[@lovexdevour0910]

Ah yes, the three main words for judging something : "good", "bad", and my favourite, "hello"

[@thejadedcommenter7371]

Saying “no problem” to respond to an older person makes them think you’re disregarding them. Saying “you’re welcome” to a younger person makes them think that you believe you are entitled to their thanks. It’s almost like people should get over minor word choices and accept the response to “thank you” without being fussy.

[@gabrielabatista6016]

I usually say no problem as a response to thank you, but sometimes I add a "happy to help!", specially if it's an older person. I still keep my default automatic response, but by adding that it usually avoids offending anyone because of word games.

[@megrocks3026]

So true with the you’re welcome one!

[@thejadedcommenter7371]

@@megrocks3026 I think it ties into how nowadays everybody’s expected to be more self-deprecating than a frickin servant. But of course they’re only allowed to show self-doubt when they’re complimented or they’re seen as compliment-baiting, and they’re not allowed to be _too_ stubborn about it otherwise they’re seen as rude for not taking the compliment (or, again, seen as compliment-fishing).

[@cinnamonpirate5294]

I've never had an older person think "no problem" is an issue - in fact that's who I got it from. "You're welcome" is often said w/sarcasm regardless of age. You have to tone check on "you're welcome" but not w/"no problem" in my experience. *edited for clarity

[@mariama1735]

I would argue that the reason “you’re welcome” may sound impolite is not because we think that someone else thinks they’re entitled to our thanks, but because the phrase is often used in a sarcastic tone and it’s hard to differentiate between sarcasm and sincerity.

[@JETZcorp]

Tom: "Don't be like Gandalf" Every German: "Why would you ask how I am doing if you do not want to know? This is inefficient."

[@ButcherParry]

I'm British but small talk can be just annoying. Probably because so many British people will small talk to random strangers and even sometimes for hours at bus stops or wherever... sometimes I just want to listen to my music or whatever else and have a quiet bus journey? Did I say sometimes I mean always.

[@nerdstark9002]

"How are you?" "You shall not pass."

[@wilczus222]

Most of Poland agrees as well. Brits be wildin' sometimes.

[@RabbiHerschel]

@El Cactuar If my understanding of Finnish society is correct, if you're standing close enough to exchange small talk, one of you is doing something wrong.

[@Septimus_ii]

@@ButcherParry are you from the north of England? That's stereotypically a very Northern thing that would be considered extremely rude in London

[@lukasraynor]

As a relatively "young folk" I've never thought you're welcome is impolite. I always thought it sounded the most formal and sincere.

[@teamjacob2388]

I always use “ no problem” because to me it’s expressing that I didn’t mind doing it. With “ you’re welcome “ it seems like acknowledging they were a burden

[@RyanTosh]

It's funny because for older people it seems to be reversed, somehow

[@LynxSouth]

Saying 'no problem' indicates you think the person who said thank you was (rudely) asking you to do something that most people would think was indeed a problem, but you're somehow special so you don't. No problem = what you asked me was a problem, so you were rude to ask it [but I'm so nice that I'll say it wasn't a problem (for me)]

[@RyanTosh]

@@LynxSouth To me "you're welcome" sounds more like that. Maybe we should all just coldly walk away when someone says thanks, at least that's harder to misinterpret :p

[@LynxSouth]

@@RyanTosh Turning your back on someone and/or walking away is highly offensive in every culture I know of. Good manners are just the formulas for behavior to keep the wheels of social interaction well-oiled. They keep that part of civilization pleasant and flowing smoothly because we agree on these formulas. There are lots of fine ways to say "you're welcome", but there wasn't a problem until some people stuck in one that sounds the opposite to most people. Please try 'don't mention it' or "happy to help' or one of the many others.

[@RyanTosh]

@@LynxSouth I'm joking that it's equally offensive to everyone so it can't be misinterpreted :p

[@michaeljuliano8839]

I’m an American who flew into Italy with a stop at Heathrow a few years back. Even though I’m quite familiar with the differences of British English from a fair amount of time watching BBC programming, I was still caught off guard when I was told by a smiling security person, “off you go.” I knew what this meant and that it is harmless in BE, but it still felt rude to me in the moment. I had to consciously coach myself that I was being given permission to move on and was not just told to piss off.

[@markimoss9890]

LMFAO

[@phydeux]

They could have also said "off you pop". But at least it wasn't "jog on".

[@lucie4185]

In the UK a jovial "Pissorff!" isn't rude in certain contexts.

[@jammer523691aj]

@@lucie4185 we don't pronounce the r so I don't know wtf you're talking about

[@lucie4185]

@@jammer523691aj we do in the south west so maybe reexamine your personal biases.

[@tecc]

I lived in Japan for a while and as a result picked up on the habit of emphatic back channeling. Now that I’m living in the US, misunderstandings happen shockingly regularly and I find myself having to explain that, no, it’s not that I agree or already saw the movie or Heard the story, I’m just indicating that I’ve understood the words coming out of your mouth.

[@eekee6034]

I try to make my back channel sort-of in-tune with the story rather than noises which sound like agreement, if that makes sense. It doesn't always work. :)

[@helza]

I'm hearing you

[@alexfarrell3250]

What's funny is I do this as someone who has only ever lived in the US. It to me seems very natural and sometimes leads to confusion

[@blokvader8283]

Maybe I'll need to experience this to understand it fully, but just off the top of my head, I can't understand where confusion would be coming from. I'm someone that lives in the states btw.

[@pogpogpurinn]

@@blokvader8283 as someone who kind of does the same thing but not completely, how I understand it is: because the noises tend to be affirmative, but it is because they are prompting the convo to continue and that they understand, not in response to what they are saying, which some probably won't understand and assume they are agreeing with them.

[@amyharth5446]

Thank you! This helped me understand myself and makes me feel so much better. I’m relatively young and neurodivergent. I know I am not supposed to take certain expressions at their content value but this one always bothers me. Now this helps me let go and know that it’s actually other people trying to be polite while my content focus makes me have different opinions about what is polite! Great video.

[@kariscoyne1886]

Current Project: replacing all my backchanneling with 'aye' so that I give off a slightly piratey vibe at all times

[@BonaparteBardithion]

Don't forget the occasional Yar. "Aye... Aye... Oh, aye! Yar."

[@NothingXemnas]

They: "hello!" Me: *"AHOY!"*

[@stoffer6365]

You absolute mad lad.

[@saint4life09]

That's just Northern England and Scotland normally

[@MrCubFan415]

@@NothingXemnas Fun fact: “Ahoy” was actually the preferred phone greeting of Alexander Graham Bell, the inventor of the telephone.

[@computersguy13]

"(Good) Morning" is a greeting "(Good) Afternoon" is a greeting "(Good) Evening" is a greeting "(Good) Night" is a farewell.

[@colehartel7206]

"Good day, sir!" is a firm farewell. "G'day, mate!" is a friendly greeting.

[@quilynn]

saying "have a" at the beginning turns all of these into farewells

[@WeMuckAround]

Cole Hartel ‘farewell’ is also phatic

[@GabesHacks]

"I said good day!" is definitely a firm farewell.

[@MisterJSeRi0uS]

See where I'm from "Afternoon" and "Evening" are also farewells. Strangely though, "Morning" isn't.

[@CrownRock1]

My brain: Hey, there's a person. I should greet them. Say something like "What's up?" or "How's it going?" My mouth: "What's gupping?"

[@VestinVestin]

_"How's it up?"_

[@CrownRock1]

@@VestinVestin I'm good, thanks! Take luck! Good care!

[@johnnycochicken]

It's gupping indeed!

[@tidalshores]

My parents: “Is everything alright?” My brain: “Say ‘Everything’s okay!’ Or maybe ‘Nothing is wrong?’” My mouth: “Everything is wrong!”

[@lowercase_ash]

yES

[@hardtfelt]

Good information. People who complain about "no problem" are just trying to find something to gripe about - they know exactly what is meant.

[@dr.jacksonbright5723]

I tend to think of “no problem” being kinder, as you are implicitly denying that a favor has taken place, whereas “you’re welcome” implies that there was effort on your part to aid the other and that it wasn’t what you wished to be doing.

[@mrcakeday1439]

But the translation is the same in the end. To communicate that you were glad to help and do not expect a favor in return.

[@augustuslunasol10thapostle]

@@mrcakeday1439 to younger people your welcome feels a like your saying "I went out of my way to help you so I accept this thanks"

[@anafu-sankanashi8933]

@@augustuslunasol10thapostle Tho no problem can also come off as: Please, Please no need to thank me. 😂

[@augustuslunasol10thapostle]

@@anafu-sankanashi8933 thats the point dingus the younger generations feel as though they don't need to be thanked for something expected

[@anafu-sankanashi8933]

@@augustuslunasol10thapostle didnt have to say dingus.

[@jamesmatthews291]

Instead of “You’re welcome” / “No problem”; confuse everyone with the Han Solo approach when anyone says “Thank you”: “I know”

[@MetalusPiperius]

Nothing to do with Han Solo but i have a weird habbit of responding with "i know" to almost anything, even when someone is telling me about something i DON'T know, i instinctively respond "i know"

[@Milesco]

@@MetalusPiperius: I know.

[@NoNameAtAll2]

@@Milesco I know

[@Carewolf]

Just use "you too" as a generic phatic expressions for all situations... People either get it, or are amused.

[@WilliamAndrea]

Haha, as a Canadian, that's what Americans sound like when they "Sure" or "Uh-huh". I know they mean "Don't mention it" but it still makes me irrationally angry for a split second every time I hear it.

[@leoschuler]

Phatic expressions are the ping command to humans, unfortunately people with different OS have the same command with different names

[@ianr.1225]

People get the wrong impression when you respond to "How are you?" with "ACK", for some reason.

[@liranpiade4499]

"Hello" "You just said hello to me" "You have just mentioned my hello" TCP expressions!

[@666Tomato666]

@@ianr.1225 you need better nodes in your LAN

[@kiradotee]

That's literally how "alright?" is used in Britain! Not even "how are you?" but literally ping. You'll especially noticed this if you look at someone suddenly and they ping you.

[@Opalium]

Then, when arguing, the two sides switch to UDP and start shouting without checking if the other side even listens.

[@dlockness1]

I had never heard this distinction, phatic. It really helps to make sense of how these expressions have evolved and become appropriated. Thank you!

[@aidenbagshaw5573]

I think that’s why people make fun of us Canadians for saying “sorry” a lot. We’re not always apologizing; it stands in for “pardon?” or “whoops,” and “sorry about that” is an expression that you feel bad about something, even if you didn’t cause it; for example, you might use it if someone drops an AirPod down a storm drain, or after “you okay?” if someone stubs their toe.

[@smoothred9453]

Oh im sooooory abooooot that eh

[@jiya-jn6bb]

that's not just a canadian thing....

[@kirstyd8909]

British people also constantly say sorry. Even when there's nothing to be sorry about

[@aidenbagshaw5573]

@@kirstyd8909 English-speaking regions of Canada do take a large majority of cultural and linguistic heritage from Britain, so I suppose that makes sense.

[@danielclasen809]

When you walk into a glass door: "sorry"

[@zero2spearo]

I always assumed that opening was Tolkien's way of acknowledging the limitations of the written medium and how easy it is for readers to interpret the same text. Then Bilbo's response "All of them at once" simply signals to reader that there is no way to mis-interpret the book and that its going to be a fun read. Although maybe its just a funny scene simply because its deliberately obtuse.

[@ishashka]

It also establishes Gandalf as a lighthearted character, who despite being wise, mysterious, and powerful, likes to indulge in silly banter and playful contemplation.

[@hollyhugh1910]

@@ishashka You both sound like my english teacher 😂

[@ishashka]

@@hollyhugh1910 😆

[@peeelan]

English majors be like

[@samuelinzunzapino9734]

Both of them at once!

[@BarackObamaJedi]

What do you mean "don't be Gandalf"? Are you telling me that I am Gandalf but I shouldn't be, or that I'm not Gandalf and I should keep not being him?

[@DesertDog]

Wow!

[@BarackObamaJedi]

@@DesertDog thx

[@dynamicworlds1]

Gandaf is like Batman. Always be yourself...unless you can be Gandalf/Batman. Then be Gandalf/Batman.

[@anneaunyme]

@@dynamicworlds1 Can you be both?

[@emptyother]

Is that Gandalf in a bat costume, or Batman with a magic staff and a pointy hat?

[@matthewmason8982]

Thank you for teaching me the term “phatic expression”. I’ve been using the term “pointless talking” up to now 😅

[@gingerhiser7312]

I use the phrase idiomatic expression.

[@amonynous9041]

Instead of phatic just say "I love you", that gets them every time

[@reginaldforthright805]

Don’t forget to add no homo

[@Tedisdeaad]

The Patrick Star technique

[@hopefullyhelping6664]

@@Tedisdeaad That’s too much effort. Ain’t nobody got time for “no homo!”

[@fumbduck8723]

Welcome to Costco. I love you

[@bloodsunsubs]

istg i tell people i love them as just a normal thing and they look so starstruck. it’s really funny if i’m being honest

[@GeorgeMarionerd]

When I was depressed, I always despised being constantly asked how I was. It was just a greeting, nobody actually wanted to know, but I was trying my best not to think about how absolutely miserable I was, and being asked about how I am just made me reconsider my emotional state and brought all the misery back to the surface again.

[@reharm_reality]

This! And then having to say "I'm fine" just made me feel like a liar, and then I felt guilty, and it just made everything worse.

[@TheLostfoundation]

I usually say how I'm actually feeling to see if they are actually paying attention to me or not

[@pugsnhogz]

@@TheLostfoundation which, as this video explains quite nicely, is just plain unfair of you 😉

[@micaelstarfire8639]

@@reharm_reality I had a similar problem, so i just started responding with, "Alive". Which was completely factually true.

[@ryer8477]

@@pugsnhogz why would it be unfair of him say how he's feeling??

[@CheeerriOH]

I'm personally fond of "Howyagoinmate", an Australian dialect. Always to be followed with "Yeaahnottoobadmate" naturally. I do find it so amusing that I'm constantly asking people how they are going but social norms/social awkwardness means that nobody actually will tell me how they are going.

[@colehartel7206]

Kiwi says: "How's it going?" American hears: "Acid gun?"

[@HappyBeezerStudios]

"Howyagoinmate" - "on my legs" If I ever happen to live in Australia I will totally trick people with that. Answering a phatic greeting with an actual response should be cofusing like hell.

[@magik4353]

Howdoyouusegoanimate

[@R.T.and.J]

true Aussies just scream "OI CANT" at people they pass by

[@stensoft]

How they are going. Oh, that's so Australian or Kiwi. Brits were often surprised, I even got a response that he's not going, he's standing.

[@ItchyKneeSon]

As a former English teacher (among other things) in Japan for nearly a decade, this is not only interesting, but almost funny. When listening to someone explain something in person or on the phone, a properly-timed 'un' (うん, pronounced 'oon' as in 'spoon' with about 90% emphasis on the 'n' sound) is crucial to keep things going smoothly. If you miss a few in a row, they'll likely check to make sure you're there or still with them. Language shaped by culture (and vice versa) is so interesting.

[@abluecassette]

That's fascinating, I love it!

[@vladdythebear5872]

I feel like 'no problem' is politer than 'you're welcome' 'You're welcome' sounds like the person saying it expects to be thanked for what the did 'No problem' sounds more humble because you're saying that the 'thanks' isn't necessary and that you don't need recognition for helping

[@Atlas552]

I feel like you're welcome is more polite because it tells the other person that you happily helped them.

[@swevixeh]

Same thing in Swedish.

[@PongoXBongo]

I go by how the other person thanks me. "Thanks" + "No problem" vs "Thank you" + "You're welcome." Better still though is "my pleasure". ;)

[@roi_sorab]

I have heard "No problem" implies there was a problem or it was a problem for you. So that might be the reason why people think its impolite.

[@PongoXBongo]

@@roi_sorab I'll buy that. Problem? No, no problem. (no = negative) Welcome? Yes, yes welcome. (yes = positive) If there's genuinely no problem, then don't even utter the word. ;)

[@sitron7224]

meanwhile, in Norway, starting a conversation with a greeting often comes off as suspicious lmao. If you come at a stranger on the bus stop with "good morning" they'll think you're up to something. Getting their attention with a simple "du?" before asking whatever question you had and then ending the conversation is considered polite.

[@MunkiZee]

This is probably what England would be like if we only happened across another human being once every few years or so

[@woodybob01]

@@MunkiZee this is gold

[@MCLooyverse]

I like this. Although I can't just say "you" (I assume that's what "du" means) without putting a "hey" or "oi" infront.

[@sitron7224]

@@MCLooyverse right! it means "you", and we mostly use it the same way as English does, but just saying "du?" in Norwegian is essentally the same as saying "oi". Truly the most informal way to get someone's attention. Some more "posh" folks might consider you rude for it, but again, they would be much more annoyed if you tried to small talk with them.

[@charlottejameson8924]

@@sitron7224 like "hey, you!". Not polite in English. Likely to get you a glare. 'Excuse me.' we say.

[@Mefistofy]

Whenever you ask a German how they are, be prepared, you might get told how they actually are. I like that part about our culture.

[@christafranken9170]

Same here in the Netherlands. Be prepared to potentially hear someones life story..

[@ericarougelazarus9453]

In Italy as well

[@melonlord1414]

It's eighter a full presentation about the persons state of being or no small talk at all. There isn't much of a middle ground.

[@ArchsageCanas]

If both people had a rough day, the weather is bad etc. then both can feel bad together and that's good.

[@RandomPlanets]

Finns are in this club too. Also we are usually silent listeners and only interrupt if we have something to say. English teachers have a hard time teaching us to act in a manner that is considered even remotely polite in English speaking countries.

[@nait4560]

as a brit (never been to japan), i do looaads of back channelling, and it does cause quite a lot of misunderstandings. eg. me “mhm *nods*” them “oh did i already tell you about that?” me “oh, no, sorry, carry on” but for me it’s a way to keep myself focused on listening and absorbing what they are saying. if i stay quiet my mind will wander and i’ll get distracted and end up not listening.

[@thecraftyphysicist8349]

I misread that as Phallic Expressions, definitely seemed rude after that

[@unnwas]

lmao

[@dindings]

The Crafty Physicist phallic expressions are intrinsic to the English language...like boner to tromboner

[@derpimusmaximus8815]

What's up?

[@xunxekri]

Freud would have a thing or two to say about that.

[@Sebach82]

The only thing rude about it would be to bring it up and not follow though..;) Srsly tho, l missed these vids of his. Real vintage Tom.

[@Zsokorad]

I say "no problem" when the task had no negative effect on me, and I say "you're welcome" when it did. "Thank you for letting me know" "No problem" "Thank you for the expensive gift" "You're welcome"

[@chelsey8737]

Huh thats a good point

[@ALifeOfWine]

Exactly this.

[@meowtherainbowx4163]

I’ve recently run into this when giving customers their food. I have to give a quick but appropriate formality in response to the usual “thank you,” and I soon realized that the more busy and exhausted I was, the more likely I was to use “no problem” instead of “you’re welcome.” I’m 19, so I’m fairly young. Maybe part of it is generational, but it’s not clear-cut. Now if I could only figure out the perfect response whenever someone says, “I ‘preciate it.”

[@endorsedbryce]

Precisely maybe I'm a bit of a Gandalf. But i feel that these expressions should convey some meaning. "I'll say how are you?" If I genuinely want to know. vs "I hope your well. " if I don't wish for a response. I don't much like it when people I'm not close with asking me questions such as how are you because I feel obliged then to respond. I don't typical want to respond because the truthful answer is i'm not well. Then Im forced with the conundrum of lieing to someone, which just isn't in my nature. Or telling them I'm not well witch then steers the, just now blossoming, conversation in a direction I do not wish, distracting from what ever is actually needed to be said. Also possibly make it look like i'm seeking attention.

[@user-ye5cl3xd6c]

I do the same

[@MINERAL-115]

"Thank you." "Happy to help." Always worked out well for me, for what it's worth! (British English)

[@The_BenD]

"My pleasure" tends to work quite well too! (At least here in Canada it does)

[@Conman123Official]

No worries mate

[@thekandycinema3193]

Any time is a great one to either add to the start or end to show that it 100% was not an inconvenience and you'd be more than happy to do it again. Any time, happy to help one I've said a couple of times with great responses

[@fosspointer]

The Greek word for hello is literally a shortening of the phrase "I wish you be healthy", which is shortened to just "health". "Εύχομαι να είσαι υγιής" -> "Υγεία" -> "Γεια"

[@stratonikisporcia8630]

Same with Japanese, the word for "hello" is 今日は, literally "today (topic particle)", which is short from 今日は御機嫌いかゞですか, meaning "How are you doing today ?" Also note that 今日 is pronounced "konnichi", here, instead of the more modern form "kyou"

[@fortunefavorsthebold3459]

@@stratonikisporcia8630 and "Genki?" as a greeting too (at least among us youth in the 20 aughts :D), which literally just means "healthy?"

[@stratonikisporcia8630]

@@fortunefavorsthebold3459 Comparable to the American English "wassup"

[@fortunefavorsthebold3459]

@@stratonikisporcia8630 spot on :D

[@llywrch7116]

@@stratonikisporcia8630To my ear "wassup" is what someone who is trying too hard to be hip would say. Probably because as a phrase it's worn out its welcome.

[@KleinOfficial]

that's why I typically go for "you got it brother" instead of no problem. grandma's concerned though

[@arsenalfanatic09]

Are you Hulk Hogan

[@themodernshoe2466]

I see a fellow Gibraltar player

[@reginabell3814]

-H

[@kylemcmullan2929]

Do you sign your tweets with "Much love - HH"?

[@keki4578]

Lmao in Chinese we also greet with “Have you eaten?”

[@charliesmith7963]

what’s the usual response to this?

[@yourex-wife4259]

@@charliesmith7963 Good, and you?

[@jamescarroll6881]

Dangerous to greet an American like that

[@palibakufun]

@@yourex-wife4259 Oh, not so bad

[@reginaldforthright805]

Explains a lot about the morbid obesity problem in that ancient country doesn’t it

[@esterlyn7604]

I must be between generations because I often say “You’re very welcome. It’s not a problem.”

[@ZXZZ66_]

I see this as an absolute win

[@Secret_Moon]

And then in the next generation: "It's not very welcome. You're a problem."

[@deleqtronica8733]

@@Secret_Moon that’s what starting to happen now with the younger kids that were even more entitled and spoiled the 90s babies.

[@encycl07pedia-]

You're more verbose than most.

[@mrcakeday1439]

hmm, usually still say you're welcome. I guess languague changes haven't caught up with non-english countries yet. The direct tramslation in my languague would be "it's nothing".

[@Lxyaltyhvh]

I feel like this is one of the few videos on KZbin that I genuinely learned a great deal from. Thank you!

[@clearsmashdrop5829]

As an American being told "Cheers" by folks from our UK team was always perplexing...for me that's drinking language....

[@shaunneary2928]

Drinking culture aye ;)

[@rachelgarber1423]

Ikr 🤔

[@theepicosityofpizza]

In South Africa we say cheers for goodbye

[@Hevlikn]

It's our drinking language too 🤷‍♀️

[@atomictraveller]

a perplexed american... never seen one a those before chortle its like james t. kirk... "other culture... still... existing..." *vein on forehead*

[@Ciaran55]

*Them:* thanks for helping *Me trying to be polite*: your problem

[@Liggliluff]

Or: no welcome

[@mischa2643]

I do this all the time when I'm on a sort of autopilot and get stuck between options

[@disorganizedorg]

The response "your problem" suggests that your help was less than helpful ;)

[@hayatobun]

I felt that

[@LashanR]

As an Australian who lived in Canada for 2 years and just moved to London, this is breaking my brain 🇦🇺 🇨🇦 🇬🇧

[@HappyBeezerStudios]

Now Imagine you would've spent all those years in the US. Australian and Canadian English is closer to BE than the US version.

[@revuesdeminuit4071]

Ginger as someone who’s lived in Canada and the US, as well as visited England, and has numerous Australian friends, I can say that Australian English, Canadian English, and traditional English are far more similar to each other, than they are to American English. Your enthusiasm towards pedantic condescension doesn’t change that.

[@sschmidtevalue]

@@HappyBeezerStudios I disagree. Although I would grant that Australian is closer to BE, I think that Canadian has a LOT more in common with the US version than BE. (Though some of the spellings are BE.)

[@bluedjules]

@@HappyBeezerStudios Now imagine you come from a country where they actually don't speak English, and move to another country where they speak yet again another language. Story of Europe. You Anglos don't know what struggle is 🇪🇺

[@HappyBeezerStudios]

@@bluedjules and that is actually be the case. being a non native speaker and doing most daily talk with other non native speakers just because English is the language all of us are fluent in.

[@dishwasher8000]

Some people don’t even say no problem or you’re welcome, like my dad just says “mhm” when I say thank you

[@PhilBoswell]

I'm fairly sure Gandalf was pulling Bilbo's leg, and JRRT was thereby pulling the collective legs of his readership.

[@MyoticTesseract]

Can you tell him to leave my legs alone, then? I do need them for a lot of things.

[@dynamicworlds1]

Not just pulling his leg. Getting Bilbo to conciously think about the phrase worked to several ends, all of which helped inch him closer to going on the adventure.

[@djrtg]

When I was younger I once used the Aussie greeting “How’s it going?” with one of my UK relatives. The response I got was “I’m not going anywhere” in a confused tone. My mother then grabbed the phone and explained it was a greeting and not actually a question asking where they were going. Worked out because the phone was then passed to my Father who then immediately asked “How’s it going?”...😂

[@eclecticsoffy]

As a non-native speaker, I am blessed with quickly understanding what "how's it going?" meant.

[@FacelessQueenie]

If a Brit doesn't understand 'how's it going', that's not normal, they should.

[@jaffa3717]

A Brit would know what 'How's it going?' means

[@malalford]

Or during, say, summer: Hows this bloody heat, aye

[@foolisnoteighteenyet]

How long ago did this happen? It seems to me like they maybe didn't hear you right, because it's really weird not to understand that. We say it in Britain all the time

[@nintendolife]

Tom Scott talking about politeness strategies is the best way to spend 3 minutes and 50 seconds.

[@xXRealDriverXx]

My sex life would disagree. If I had one.

[@RadiaUmbra]

Wasn't expecting you guys here!

[@Prutswerk]

Only if you live a lonely life.

[@izaacburrell8128]

These quick videos have just recently popped up on my feed and i am quite enjoying them. Thank you.

[@marycrawford7209]

When I lived in Australia briefly it took me a while to stop being a little confused when I'd say thank you to an Australian person and they'd respond "that's all right." In the US that's typically an acknowledgement of an apology rather than thanks.

[@EvanDrinkwater]

Or we just say ‘no worries’ which may be disconcerting also!

[@seekeroftheway]

Evan Drinkwater We say no worries in southern California too

[@EvanDrinkwater]

Big A L ha ha cool. Probably because we don’t have any 😊

[@andrewtucker94]

@Elijah Wouldn't We do use it in Britain.

[@blackletter2591]

@@EvanDrinkwater Or 'no wukkers', which is probably even more confusing. (no f**king worries spoonerised)

[@revlis4063]

as a cashier my brain is on a constant loop of all these phrases and it seems i even chant them all in alphabetical order in my dreams. i cannot escape them. there are far too many.

[@liarwithagun]

I remember working night shift for months then I was places on morning shift and kept involuntarily saying "Have a nice night!" at 8 am. I'd even randomly say thank you to things in my private life where that response didn't make sense because it was so ingrained for me to say it to customers at the end of any conversation.

[@treehugger444]

@@liarwithagun that last one hit home x'D I stated saying both Thank you & I'm sorry way too often to friends and family since starting to work at a restaurant

[@joaovitormatos8147]

Backchanneling is so common in Japan that (as I've been told) they see us westerners as "cold people" because here we try to be as polite as possible so we avoid interrupting at all

[@kingcrimson4133]

Me, personally, I nod like I'm at a metal concert whenever I'm listening intently to somebody. I always worry I look stupid rattling my head up and down.

[@AbdulrahmanMajash]

I'm used to backchanneling in my native language (Arabic) so I often get complimented for that as a foreigner when speaking to Japanese people. Feels good sometimes haha

[@BichaelStevens]

I dislike back channeling

[@WaveForceful]

I not sure that is accurate, I have a few Japanese friends and I talk to them like I talk to someone at home in the UK. Japan is complicated as in working environments and on public transport for example it is very important to speak formally and avoid doing things such as blowing your nose, pointing, eating...hell even talking on the phone. The Japanese are just like westerners when it comes to socializing in a social environment, i.e with friends, and it's more polite to speak informally. This is the same in the UK, at work you act and speak professionally when you can act causally when speaking to friends or if you are in a casual environment.

[@scoreunder]

@@BichaelStevens I'm not going to trust that from someone whose name says "fire your penis to my face" in Google Translate tier formal Japanese

[@kevinmhadley]

I had gotten used to “no problem” as a response to “thank you” that I felt uncomfortable using it. Now I use “you’re welcome” more often. I now use “stay safe” in place of “ have a nice day” about 40 percent of the time when ending and encounter given the current health situation. I’ve heard quite a few younger people use “you as well” in place of “you too” in response to “have a nice day”.

[@GeeTransit]

"How are you?" "Problemless."

[@insanejughead]

Anti-problematic

[@MeNowDealWIthIt]

absolutelynotme_irl

[@burokkiboi7773]

“No worries mate” in Australia is used every two seconds when talking to someone

[@HGmolotov]

Same in Yorkshire, england

[@georgelewis8537]

@@HGmolotov just England mate all over

[@stt.9433]

That's actually my go to. I also like the "cheers mate".

[@markimoss9890]

@@georgelewis8537 I'm from London and I've never heard anybody under the age of 60 say that

[@boneyween]

I'm from Oxfordshire and under 60 and use "no worries"

[@h2o848]

when howdy is seen as formal Interviewer: Hello, glad to have you here today- Me: *hOWdY*

[@madisonb8163]

I think it depends on the area. In Tennessee it isn't used much (I think) and it more for friendly exchanges from what I've seen. It's like 'hey...you my bro, bro'

[@HayTatsuko]

"Howdy" is absolutely not formal in any context where I exist, here in the Heart of Dixie.

[@alexeysaranchev6118]

@@HayTatsuko What about 'Howdy, pardner'? Or does it require me to lean my thumbs against the belt too?

[@c.conga11]

My friend greets all people with "Hello!" no matter for how long she's known them. It's so endearing yet simple

[@meower808]

"Howdy sounds dated" Me, a Texan who says howdy on a regular basis: What

[@Ari-hc1vr]

Texas isn't real. The government made it up

[@hallidayzol6574]

No one in texas says howdy unless they're from out of state

[@sass7319]

Howdoo is also common in parts of the South Western UK, and presumably has the same root.

[@mnorth1351]

Here in Minnesota, USA, you might occasionally hear a "howdy", but when I say it, it is often to deliberately be a little quirky, ironic, or lighthearted; usually only with friends.

[@Mostlyharmless1985]

Your state is a literal cartoon. I'm sorry it took you so long to realize this.

[@AI-mg3hy]

14 years of retail employment taught me that older people don't like no problem. That might be one of the only substantial takeaways from that experience.

[@unliving_ball_of_gas]

They like problems i guess

[@aidanallen1976]

@@unliving_ball_of_gas perfect comment

[@Max-Blast_Media]

@@unliving_ball_of_gas they really do...

[@nutbastard]

Sometimes I'd refer to old women as "girls". As in "Can I get you girls anything else?" I can't recommend it as it's a total coin toss between them being flattered or straight up offended. I agree on "no problem". I've had to make a conscious effort to never say that to a customer.

[@spiritmatter1553]

"No problem" sounds....ungracious. If you can’t bring yourself to say, "You’re welcome," try "my pleasure." That feels weird too but it’s a totally acceptable substitute.

[@woodywood7766]

I can imagine tom after 4 beers going up to someone and being like "do you want to initiate in conversation"

[@zackkelley2940]

Now what if that someone was CGPGrey?

[@Rei-Rei]

The only issue I have with "no problem" is where people use it instead of "thank you". When I've just helped someone out the dynamic is for them to show appreciation for my helpful act, not to dismiss the help I have given them. It makes me want to go undo whatever it is I've done for them and leave them to see exactly how much of a problem it is without me helping.