Why You Can’t Stop Thinking: Obsessional Neurosis

[@emanspi]

Dear Prof Vaknin. We thank you, and we love you.

[@Dalibansoldier]

Very peculiar to say you love someone who is incapable of ever receiving or returning it.

[@JessicaBrown-kd1pj]

30:30 Freud was daring in introducing that, and he's close. Here's the thing. Sexual abuse of any kind before puberty is traumatizing, period. The pleasure part that he's getting wrong is something I've tried to explain to only one or two people in my life, and its very hard to explain, so I'm sure its very hard to grasp. The physical body responds in a physical way. The mind responds with absolute horror and fear. And the fact that the body is reacting, responding, is even more distressing. Its wrong on so many levels. So you grow up feeling like sex is wrong. It leaves a twisted mind and heart let me tell you.

[@psyop.survivor1446]

Oh wow. That is horrible. I am sorry you had to experience that and I thank you for sharing. I can't even imagine. I hope you take care of yourself

[@SarahSkinnyJeans]

You explained this very well.

[@heatherxlotus]

This is the most in depth yet understandable explanation I’ve heard of compulsion. Makes total sense, the mind is just trying to resolve a problem, but has a different language. Amazing.

[@Prashant131090]

Professor Dr. Sam Vaknin - I wholeheartedly thank you. Obsession is indeed a killer. Every word you say - it is gold. I am hindu and strongly believe in Karma. I must have done something good in my past life that caused me to stumble upon your videos. You showed me the way to that "rock" in the midst of stormy sea when my ship sank. Without you, I would have died miserably. Now, I will not.

[@fusion01wp]

I have obsessional neurosis due to conflict over seven years with a malignant narcissist. The hardest part was always being made the target of blame, the scapegoat for his abuse: violence, threats and lies. He attacked me with a revenge restraining order having others also attack and slander me in ways I could not have anticipated. There was never any justice, he evaded every malicious, abusive act. My neuroticism is really based on complete powerlessness in the face of injustice (blame, invalidation) and an inner shame I must defend against (the compulsion). Simply telling myself “this isn’t/wasn’t my stuff“ would work on those with healthy self-esteem but not with me! I did grow up traumatised by a narcissistic father and a traumatised, depressed mother which lead to great anxiety and depression manifesting in my early 20’s. No doubt this vulnerability lead the malignant narcissist to see me as an easy target, a guaranteed victim. It’s awful being obsessed, constantly ruminating, it’s been so many years and I’ve tried everything possible: endless meds, 4.5 years of therapy, ketamine, mdma, psilocybin, meditation, long walks - there is no cure, I can only hope to manage it somehow.

[@anjeuli]

Bravo Prof!! What a mind bender! I wouldn't have ever been told this information if not for you. Not peace of mind, but connectedness, as peace of mind becomes the disguise of obsessional rituals. Oh dear. Which is why it is hard to say, "who am I?" if all I am is protecting myself against the past. This means that a healed person is spontaneous, and willing to accept pain/misfortune/discomfort as equally important as joy etc. I have been saying over and over again, healing can be a trap! Now you've given me the name for it. "Faux peace" can turn you into the walking dead. There is a lot to unpack here, and I am so grateful to you. Thank you so much, Prof!!

[@anjeuli]

​@Born To Thrive, Not Survive! Because the inward focus towards peace of mind can sever all ties with the spontaneity of the outside world. As Prof puts it, don't aim for peace, aim for connectedness. I imagine a lot of trauma survivors regulate by avoiding stressors thus living in a cave so to speak - which isn't vitality anymore is it? I'm 33 and living like a monk in an ivory tower, but wish to be young again. Only can come with matching theory to action - and letting go of control. Life is wild, better to learn how to surf the waves than watch from the shore.

[@taichiwithkatkroll]

​@@anjeuli ​​ It's great you had that insight. I teach my own combination of the work of Moshe Feldenkrais and Mabel Todd and I make videos helping people with this very issue. I know this is spammy but I'm only commenting to encourage you going forward with letting go of control and developing awareness which leads to trusting yourself and learning and growing from your own lived experience. Generally people call this somatic practices. I don't love that term, but you could use that term along with the names I mentioned to find insights you can use to help yourself. Best!

[@ashwinshankar7752]

I obsessively watch Sam vaknin videos whenever I'm reminded of imminent doom and disintegration 😂

[@anjeuli]

Ahhh Prof love your opening reference. My art god is Salvador Dali!

[@pyru4208]

Mr. Professor can you record video about control as a defend mechanism?

[@samvaknin]

Will do.

[@sambhavi16]

Thank you professor

[@KNKLDK]

Thank you. Crystal clear explanation.

[@MultiMagnumforce]

Fear = Anxiety = Imagination = OCD

[@xochitl7489]

Jacques Lacan looks like you! 😮 thank you for your sharing!

[@rosilenealbino5338]

Prof, seus vídeos são melhores que as aulas nas universidades. Infelizmente não achei seu livro traduzido no Brasil. Parabéns pelo trabalho 👏

[@rolo2415]

Hello Prof. Vaknin, thank you for the lecture. I have a question with regards to potential symptoms regarding this condition. I know someone that fits this mould quite well, but his self admonitory ideations come in the form of auditory hallucinations at times, very catastrophic, impending doom of those close to him etc. He was given a tentative diagnosis of psychosis, due to his condition, but I know this person very well and from what I understand this does not quite fit with what he is presenting. He is indeed obsessed with his death and those around him and this is his chief concern; trying to prevent this from occurring somehow. I know, I know, get to the question already. Here it is: Is it possible for an obsessive neurotic to also present with auditory hallucinations? If so, how common is this? Thank you once again.

[@samvaknin]

No. Auditory hallucinations are either BPD or psychotic disorder.

[@Abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyznow1]

I obsessively pick at my beard until it has patches and looks terrible I grab at myself inappropriately constantly when I don’t have a beard to pick and I will zone out and do it for long periods of time I was always the obese kid, greasy hair. Behavior issues in class, etc. I used to have these tics like chomping & squeezing my glutes so tight randomly while walking that it would make me step weird I’ve wondered in the back of my mind if this has happened to me. 30:00 Sam, how do adults figure this out - to about it, get closure, cope & heal if there is unconscious forces messing up their life like sexual abuse you can’t remember?

[@whahaownage]

Is it possible that covert borderlines who are subject to alot of (betrayal) trauma use Obsessional Neurosis as a defense mechanism?

[@samvaknin]

Yes.

[@clumsygirl__]

Kant and Hegel are kinda giving different perspective on life aspects than Freud.

[@samvaknin]

You may wish to search this channel and join my Nothingess channel. I refer to both Kant and Hegel (among many others) in my work.

[@prathameshborkut5340]

Do Narcissist also suffer through obsessional neurosis?

[@samvaknin]

They can.

[@prathameshborkut5340]

@@samvaknin I never wondered I would get a reply from you Sir....hehe....Thank you☺

[@DennettDanielle]

Dr. Vaknin, Near 52:30, you stated that the neurotic will not recognize others are lacking/castrated etc, but will perceive that they are about to become castrated etc unless he prevents it. Is this not acting on potential, as we are in time and space, and some things have not yet come to complete fruition? Is this a problem in dealing with potential then?

[@DennettDanielle]

Dr. Vaknin, So you’re saying that the only way out of obsession is to give up acting on potential? To throw our hands in the air and say we have no acuation potential?

[@ibrahimhuseynov3231]

Hi, what advice would you give for someone with obsessional neurosis? Is psychoanalysis effective? I have read that knowing the cause of your symptoms does not necessarily make them disappear, since you still have the urge for compulsions. Thanks in advance.

[@samvaknin]

Psychodynamic psychotherapies tackle the core of the problem, but CBT gets rid of the symptoms.

[@airadlab8626]

Ramón Sampedro Cameán has a locked in syndrome?