Why You Should NEVER BE NICE as a Man

[@saulsarruff]

I really like this video. Something I really need to hear. A man cannot be so nice. I know this message talked to me. Being too nice comes from a place of needing acceptance. That also reflects one’s insecurities. When we walk with God, we are accepted already. No need to cater to everyone.

[@sendmail7426]

No we are not accepted already that is totally unscriptural and a doctrine of demons. God only receives us the way we are. You are conceived by the Holy Spirit not born again. You are only born again when you die like God said you must do and when your faith is finished by God. Then his blood restores you to the image of God the way Adam and Eve were created without sin. The wayward son was cleaned and given new clothes before he was restored to honor

[@righteousfroce1254]

Jesus was nice

[@xsamitt]

Epic!

[@nathandehaan183]

Not all niceness comes from a place of wanting acceptance. Mine comes from a place of having been so damaged f t om my life that I am unfixable. I struggle daily with thoughts of unlifing myself. I have spent a large portion of my life doing crazy levels of things for people who need them. They very rarely have any idea it is me though. I slip it from the side in secrecy. It's not because I am nice it is because I am selfish. I use that to tell myself it's okay to live another day. At least I made someone's life a little easier or better. I use it to counteract the thoughts in my head that the world would be far better without me here. So it's not always a need for acceptance. It almost always Is a way of behaving due to being damaged .

[@MrJanKeys]

I hear you Nathan. That definitely can be a reason for being too nice. I just want to encourage you and say, that spirit of suicide speaking to you is a liar. If you truly had no purpose, those thoughts would not be coming at you. Be strengthened in The Lord and update your mind with mind of Christ. You will be reestablished in who you are on this world. IJN. Blessings bro

[@kevindavis4709]

The bad thing is I learned sometimes a person will take advantage of your kindness, niceness generosity.

[@danilaroche1156]

They will. It's a harsh truth.

[@GeoCalifornian]

Then be a man. They may take advantage of your kindness, but they’ll come to a full stop if you’re a man to their illicit behavior. /St. George of Hyperlink

[@trailrider759]

No accusation here but sexual sin if u don't fight and keep getting back up it will keep your character and spirit weak and can bring unnecessary negative things into your daily life, got to keep the heart guarded so evil influences can't overpower you.

[@williamfriar6295]

Kevin You used the word “can.” The word you were looking for is “will.”

[@theshanamaster]

they cant take kindness away if your not handing out niceness, yea you can be kind, but don't be nice to them just because of whatever, respect is earned, not given.

[@kevinjohnson3521]

Running a business and being Christian teaches you this. You have to be a good steward, employees will try to push you around. Firing people is not easy, but after the 1st one you realize it is part of being a good steward.

[@kevinjohnson3521]

@Hollis Bush surrender your life to Jesus Christ and leave Satanic secular music alone. God is able to teach you… I am just a man

[@kevinjohnson3521]

@Hollis Bush James 4:4… if you make God #1 in your life, He will lead you where you need to go!

[@kevinjohnson3521]

@Hollis Bush forsake the worldly things though…

[@MaskedRiderChris]

My boss is a good example of this. He does his level best to do right by us and is a hard worker himself, which I respect and admire him for. But there are times he can be better about putting his foot down and laying down the law, which is where his assistant comes in. They balance each other out well and I get along well with and respect them both. Both are good leaders in their own manner. But...I have the one coworker who, while I get along with him just fine and he's not a bad guy, and he's having a hard time right now in his life? He's immature, unmotivated, and likes to argue for the sake of arguing, and seems to have trouble taking responsibility for his lack of motivation, and my boss is past the point of having to put his foot down with this guy and say "Look, I get you're having troubles, but shape up or ship out." I've been where this guy is, so I can't speak too harshly, but I also had good managers who supported me and pointed me in the right direction and I thankfully have been able to keep my job intact. I fear this guy may not be so lucky and that he may get a loud wake up call eventually.

[@kevinjohnson3521]

@@MaskedRiderChris I think all of us have been there… people need to take responsibility for themselves. Laziness & bad attitude will make you poor as the Scripture says. We all must learn it!

[@kenlandon7803]

Be gentle as a dove; wise as a serpent.

[@alyshamorris6275]

Wise a serpent means know when to bite when necessary, otherwise use wisdom and discernment before you do it 😂

[@mmommo10]

be a watchdog not a golden retriever. absolutely love that, an answer to prayer.

[@Murph_gaming]

I think a better example is the Husky. Golden Retrievers will alert you to the presence of someone unknown, they just aren't great guard dogs. Huskies though...They just want to be friends with everyone

[@gersonemmanuelsantosfernan9237]

You are right Mark about the point of the world. I had friends who were not Christians, when Christ rescued me and I began to preach the Gospel, they did not like it at all and they moved away. Thanks for these videos, I think I'm on the right path, although I recognize that I still have a long way to go, I trust that God will continue to work in me.

[@sendmail7426]

Keep the sabbath for once then you won’t be so weak in faith and obedience. Friday sunset to Saturday sunset is the 7th day the law is eternal God said so if you break the law you are still in sin and God dosent know you

[@gersonemmanuelsantosfernan9237]

@@sendmail7426 ???

[@sendmail7426]

@@gersonemmanuelsantosfernan9237 most so called Christians think they are no longer under the law. Those who keep it correctly are no longer under the law. Those who purposely break it are the workers of iniquity those who lived for themselves. So most so called Christians refuses to keep the sabbath so they never find God

[@Austin-qj8qx]

@@sendmail7426 absolute nonsense.

[@sendmail7426]

@@Austin-qj8qx no there’s a reason why there’s a death penalty for breaking the sabbath as long as you refuse to obey God you will always be in darkness never understanding or learning. And you will never learn to love God. Every sin causes you separation from God. Every sin

[@santiagodg94]

I needed this video. One of the things that I always fought against is my physique. I was always a skinny guy with “baby” face. This made me think for many years that I should be nice so everyone could accept me and protect me, because I was weak and I could never protect myself. But I’ve reached the point of limit after all these years. It’s good that God emphasizes strength in character and not physical. All this men in the Bible had a strong will and character but never were involved in street fights for example or died fighting against soldiers. Even David couldn’t carry the armor he was supposed to wear to fight against Goliath.Thanks mark

[@cloaker2829]

Physical strength is still important.

[@santiagodg94]

@@cloaker2829 it is. But it is not what only defines your masculinity. Otherwise what God has to say about people who are born naturally not strong or not “masculine”?

[@chelseabarker2250]

As Paul said, training of the physical body is of some value, but training of the spiritual mind is of eternal benefit.

[@user-sn1se8kh7z]

David became a strong warrior; did he not?

[@MattTheBandGuy]

I never once got this lesson in the 32 years I was in the Mormon church. As a new Christian, I really appreciate this.

[@eric_martindale1711]

I agree with this 1000%. I spent 20 years in the Marine Corps. I was Bible believing Christian the entire time. The problem with the word “nice“ is, as you mentioned in the beginning, the connotation. People mistake “nice“ for weakness. Christian men need to be strong, and they even need to be violent at times.

[@fortodaymark]

Violent Gentlemen - an ice hockey apparel brand

[@rogermartinez8606]

Devil Dog. I agree people are assholes and the older I get the more of an asshole I become.

[@TommyBowerscoasters]

Wise as a serpent, and gentle as a dove. Amen 🙏

[@AS-ng5pi]

And don't let anyone shame you for your masculinity, your assertiveness, and your strength of character and faith. Challenge those who seek to shame you and watch them tuck their tails.

[@jeffreypaulross9767]

Just don’t confuse macho with masculinity, and be careful with the assertiveness narrative. That could create a problem for you.

[@SquidShield]

@@jeffreypaulross9767 Were the prophets not assertive? They didn't sugarcoat everything like we do today, they said it like it is. If I may, I believe you're worried about assertiveness devolving into wrath, which it certainly can. The opposite of the sin of wrath is the virtue of gentleness. Jesus, the most gentle man ever, never withheld the truth because it may have hurt someone's feelings. Gentless means doing good with the least amount of possible harm, not without any harm. We are called to speak the truth and the truth hurts. For example, an unbeliever being told about their inevitable second death is the most painful and also most loving thing they will ever hear.

[@jeffreypaulross9767]

@@SquidShield I think we might be conflating two different situations here? The first commenter, was equating assertiveness with masculinity, which isn’t always the case. These days a lot of times, assertiveness is associated with macho aggression, or bad “spiritual” teachings like EST, other assertiveness trainings, or just plain old greed! In the Greek New Testament, we have two different words for gentle. έπεικής (epieikēs) and ήπιος (ēpios), they both mean mild, kind, gentle, moderate, and patient. None of those definitions sound like assertiveness to me. And yes, we are to earnestly contend for the faith (Jude 1:3), but that is to be tempered with speaking the truth IN LOVE (Eph. 4:15). We must also remember that meekness, long suffering, and gentleness, are all the fruits of the Spirit. (Gal. 5:22-23) The reason why I’m saying all of this, is to buffer what that first person said. They seem to almost have a militant view of assertiveness, so I thought I’d offer a contrasting narrative...

[@SquidShield]

@jeffreypaulross9767 A lot of overly macho types use assertiveness to justify their hateful behavior, but that doesn't mean assertiveness itself is wrong. Assertive behavior is confident and forceful, not ruthless or cruel. Jesus was always confident and forceful. He never wavered from or doubted his values and duties. He was very forceful with his teaching, but still gentle. Just look at how he spoke to the pharisees. In fact, God is always the most gentle, but he still rained fire and brimstone on cities. Passivity and pacifism doesn't come from gentleness, it comes from slothfulness.

[@jeffreypaulross9767]

@@SquidShield Have you ever watched pastor Greg Locke? Right there is a perfect example of assertiveness gone wrong, and that’s what I was addressing in my comments.

[@mr.d3916]

Honestly, some of these happened to me. I learned it in a hard way. It is true being too kind (nice) is not really a good thing. Most of the time people even in the church will misinterpret you. Sometimes some people will not respect you and take advantage of you. People sees being nice and funny person as not being serious in life - this is the reality. Also being too kind and not showing you are hurt will make them always to continue to take you for granted. I've learned that you have to be kind to yourself first before being kind to others. I've learned that all this time I am a people pleaser. What hurts sometimes is that even your closest friends are judging you. At first you are glad they are correcting you but as time goes by, you will see that they are also criticizing you and always defining you of what you were before, when in fact you are trying to change and get better. It really hurts that the people you expect who understand you are the ones who will first judge you. It hurts that you are expecting them they know that is not your intentions, but at the end of the day even them they misinterpret you. Now I realize you need to have boundaries to the people around you. Forgive but have boundaries. Be with the people that really knows and cares for you.

[@johnosasi4710]

Thanks for sharing this my mans. The last part of your paragraph - i like the part where you mentioned forgiving, but also having boundaries - this sticks up for me, and i was the typical nice guy myself, but something clicked toward the end of the year, and now I'm destroying old paths and creating new ones going forward.

[@ironmatto3]

Gotta love hypocritical users in the Church, too many of them sadly.

[@mr.d3916]

@BB49 Honestly you are right man. This is what I realized recently. The more they see you get easily affected by things, the more they will touch you. But as you have said, when you are not weak, even they will criticize you, they know you cannot be moved.

[@mr.d3916]

@BB49 What do you mean you can even act weak when you are strong? How is that? Is that for?

[@lukeswain1752]

Bitter sweet reading this. I've been both. The judged, and also the judger. I've been hurt and also done hurting. I regret all the hurting I've done. Self control is a heck of a mountain to climb. I'm really trying to love myself more. That's a big problem I have. Feeling like I'm nothing and treating everyone around me like royalty. Having no self worth is a destructive path. I've been on that path and just started to turn around. The worst thing is I have trust issues now. Putting people around me high on pedestals. Trying so hard to be with people who I thought were my friends. Only to be let down and disappointed. Which led to anger toward those people. Which led to self hate. Hating myself because I got angry at people who didn't care about me in the first place. A vicious cycle. "Why am I not good enough???" For years. Now I'm starting to put my trust and faith in myself and only myself. Re building the few relationships that I still had and terminating most. It's been a long few years.

[@jessec8562]

So I was never taught any of this growing up. Up until somewhat recently my live whole has been a joke. I thought being nice was the goal and to always turn the other cheek. Turns out that’s totally backwards. Get physically strong, gain confidence, make real money and keep the promises you make and success will find its way in.….

[@savedbygrace6108]

I’d encourage you to align your priorities with what God’s Word says. “Seek first the kingdom of God..” Honor God, obey His commandments, and love others❤️

[@alangwhiteTheBoss]

Bro, turning the other cheek works if you are strong enough to defend yourself and choose to stand your ground and take the beating to prove a point

[@gustavoeliasmorales77]

I'm so grateful Mark made an AGW for men and how to be one. Thank you.

[@dododifwasssup1784]

"All truly strong people are kind"

[@fuzakali9083]

I am not a Christian, but this was so incredibly beautiful and I could not agree more with everything you said!

[@highmaxking5336]

You wouldn't believe how much you probably agree with alot of the Bible. Check it out fully if you haven't.

[@nicholaswheeler507]

You are going to Hell unless you accept Jesus. Truth hurts.

[@FunCares]

Mark, You KILLED it I’m talking, knocking it outta the park with with one. Well said, thank you for being a vessel & helping with opening our eyes. A lot of us struggle & we don’t even know why we have these problems half the time. Now we do.

[@fabianmejia1545]

Thanks Brother for that powerful video. CHRIST said, “I send you out as doves against wolves. Be as loving as a dove but shrewd as a serpent” As Christian Men we are called to be wise and strong not passive and weak. GOD Bless you and your Family Brother

[@keitherickson8404]

small correction; what Jesus said was " I send you out as sheep among wolves, so be as shrewd as a serpent and gentle as a dove"

[@sbtiger556]

Behold, I send you forth as sheep in the midst of wolves: be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves. KJV

[@keitherickson8404]

@@sbtiger556 mine is from the NKJV. English is my wife's 3rd language so we skip old english as it is a stumbling block to her learning. did you even know that with regard to American copyright law, every Bible must be 10% different from any other existing Bible? true! that's why we have all kinds of filler and nonsense. we have Bible's that omit the Books of Tobit and Judith. we can only wonder why the Gospels of the Apostle Phillip is not contained in the Bible nor Mary Magdalene. likely decided in some dank candlelit basement in the year of our Lord 618. up until Mohammed believed the "Angel of light" and all the lies of that wicked creature of hell, the entire middle east was Catholic and up until the vanity of Luther & Calvin brought them to a place where they felt HOLY SCRIPTURE needed to be tweaked in their image, their were no Protestants anywhere. the unmitigated gall of changing scripture and long held beliefs are why we see Protestant churches with women in the pulpit, ignoring Jesus Christ's precedents and flat out believing that when Jesus said , " my body is real food and my blood is real drink".....someone educate me about how that statement became, "oh, HE just meant that symbolically" the ONLY thing Protestants contributed was sufficient zeal to read the Bible themselves instead of trusting the priest. so that was good yet in this day and age 45% of Catholic women are devout baby killers.

[@debbiebrown4420]

It's strength of faith and character that makes the man. David wasn't described as real tall like Saul and Absalom were, but he had faith and courage, and he stood his ground.

[@theobotha5043]

Through kindness, we show respect,regardless.

[@MettleInkpen]

Thank you for this content. I shared your links with many men in my family! In a society that is intent on emasculation, this guidance is so very needed.

[@TheDeac412]

Thank you for being a submissive and obedient woman.

[@Chucknourse]

I like how you defined “nice”. Very well put together video. You don’t have to be Christian to listen to this message. I believe every man should hear this. Thank you for your insight.

[@Tiff_lifts_alot]

I soooo agree with this! I keep telling people I don't want nice. I want kind, genuine, and respectful. It's more deep and shows the person's character more.

[@improvisedsurvival5967]

Respect is earned not handed out

[@Shepherd1234]

This hits home. Very good stuff. People have actually told me I had a golden retriever type of personality. So it's right on. Fortunately, I already saw that at some point it was a problem. And God is helping me to change.

[@italiancapo7]

Being the nice, gentle, caring & giving Christian man has never gotten me anywhere in life. Especially, with women. I always believed God would open doors & bring the right ppl into my life. Instead, it’s been the opposite. Ppl only care about themselves & take what they can. They will take advantage if you let them. Women are not attracted to nice men bc they come across as weak & needy.

[@user-sn1se8kh7z]

Also, they may conceal an anterior motive.

[@andreeaburian1408]

So so sorry to hear that... :(( On the other hand women like me can't find very nice men like me and us to be happy together.. Hiw do you explain that...

[@commondog3956]

Man, I really needed this and right at this moment. I have been, for years, a man without direction or guidance and I was also very politically left leaning, though not as radical as they are today. I have been gradually leaning more and more conservative over the years and my spirituality has become equally as important along with the socially conservative values. I have changed and grown so much over the years dealing with great depression, codependency and poor relationships with abusive women and deep isolation but I also have slowly leaned more and more into reparenting myself in a way and have become so much more interested in the values and convictions of Christ. He is the ultimate good guy who loves everyone but also stands firm in all He believes and His strength and love radiate in his words for me. I am so drawn to Him in so many ways but I definitely find myself very lacking as much as I yearn these days to be a full man of God. I am certainly a sinner. I absolutely believe Jesus came and died for us. I have rejected this world and its love affair with itself and I see the signs all around us for where the world is headed. I am nowhere close to the man I want to be for God and I pray often a lyric from a rock band I grew up listening to; "I got a will, but I want yours." and I ask God to make my will align with His. I have desires that serve no great purpose and it bothers me a great deal. Maybe this is an incoherent rant but I really needed this video, so thank you.

[@Bob31415]

It definitely sounds like the Holy Spirit is at work in your life. May God bless you. Fight the good fight of faith.

[@samuelschlinsock7862]

Jesus told it how it was, that's how men of God should be. that's something i need to work on myself, i find myself being nice rather than kind at times. and its because i'm weak and immature at the moment, but the LORD will give me the strength i need, not myself. thanks for the great video!

[@PrettyIndependent1]

As a women I think I needed this message even more. We are taught to be “nice” girls. People pleasers. So many women get in really bad situations and don’t cry out for help until it’s too late because they rather be the nice girl and give people the benefit of the doubt when they start making them uncomfortable.

[@sendmail7426]

Bible says to not please men only God. Spend more time keeping the actual sabbath you’ll remember the verses better

[@danilaroche1156]

You are right..Women are raised to be nice. Don't rock the boat..blah blah.. Being nice nearly got me killed and I was also sexually assaulted, trying to be nice.

[@philipeon2831]

@@sendmail7426 we are free from the mosaic law. go read Romans 7:3-4 KJV

[@PrettyIndependent1]

@@danilaroche1156 I’m sorry about that. Glad you’re still here. Gods got a plan for your life. Yes I thought being nice was being Christian. But I love how Mark says being kind is Christian and differentiates. It’s making me rethink my whole life. I grew up with a toxic parent that made me feel like I wanted to overcompensate for how rude they would be by being extra nice. Being nice to literally everyone isn’t wise. Being kind is having wisdom with your kindness. I do think being nice feeds into people pleasing and God doesn’t call us to please people. He calls for us to serve others. But pleasing others is a different story. We don’t have to please man. We only have to please God and we do that by treating people kindly outwardly and inwardly in how we think of them in our inner most thoughts. But we don’t have to focus on being “nice” to every single person to be kind to them.

[@danilaroche1156]

@@PrettyIndependent1 Thanks for your lovely words. I'm much stronger in the Lord now. It's all about pleasing God. I'm also abstinent till I marry and if my date doesn't like it..too bad.

[@chriscrawford7240]

Mark, I truly love your SOUND, unwoke, fierce Biblical teaching. Keep preaching, Brother! Chris

[@frankwashington8740]

Well said, Mark. Was heartfelt. Several people in past have despised me for my faith, made some feel. small. No wonder so hard to find real friends of God.

[@Peripatetic_Proletariat]

"Kindness" is a fruit of the spirit.

[@Letthykingdomcome610]

So true it’s been so many times I’ve been deceived because people abused my niceness. I always try to represent Christ and people take it for advantage. We have to be Bold as Lions. Perfect timing in seeing this vid

[@ww6739]

Very important video.

[@rodterrell304]

I'm a nice guy and I'm doing fine! Life is good

[@TsuriaDragon]

I needed to hear this badly this definitely reflects flaws in my character.

[@michaeljohnsonsr.8034]

Balanced is the key

[@stephentuck6607]

I think you do a good job of explaining why being 'nice' should NOT be the goal for a Christian man. There is a great book called "No More Christian Nice Guy" which argues we need to be Good NOT nice. That includes the essential element of strength used on behalf of others, especially the weak and vulnerable, women and children. After reading the book, I attempted to present the case the book was making at a Men's breakfast, but I felt that some in the group didn't want to give up on the idea of being 'nice' and mistook what I was saying as an excuse for men to act like jerks. For them the opposite of nice was nasty, but I was saying the opposite of nice is having the strength of your convictions and what you believe in and having the strength of character to be able to stand up to evil.

[@fatbaldguy7166]

That book changed my Christian walk , it reminded me that we are to be good, but at times we must be a huge wolf dog that protects the sheep & and our earthly Sheppard. Much hate has came at my family but no one ever hurt the brethren when we were protecting them.

[@DoubleplusUngoodthinkful]

I grew up as a nice guy and it got me nowhere. Now I am hard and assertive and, when necessary, mean or even brutal. I am also happy. I do need to work on the kind part, however.

[@g.williams2047]

Kindness when appropriate, harsh and steadfast when necessary.

[@JohnBrown-ig5nc]

I'm glad you started this channel. I've been the nice guy for too many years so now I'm having to rely on God to get me out of the hole of niceness I dug myself into

[@jnm-eh6qt]

Likewise, brother. I'm trying to figure this out at the age of 49 so that my 13 year old son doesn't make the same mistake.

[@JohnBrown-ig5nc]

@@jnm-eh6qt I'm 42 so I know what you mean. At least we're learning this now

[@mmommo10]

enjoy hearing the discussion of how being nice is not a fruit of the spirit

[@ST3yo]

Well said Mark. It's too easy to be the nice guy but I believe every man today had a dream of becoming a man one day

[@righteousfroce1254]

I imagine alot of people had a mean dad and imagined themselves being a nice person and women being more attracted and safe with them being nice.

[@KarlYoung1]

Holy Spirit is upon you brother keep going and God bless

[@texasnewb2942]

This is like a whole subject that I had never thought of but when I reflect on myself totally feels true. I guess now I just would like practical tips on how to be stronger. I was raised by a single mom and didn’t have major masculine influences and I felt like being nice to non Christian’s was me loving my enemies and sitting with tax collectors. But I also can recognize a lack of respect from some of my employees and from myself in regards to my leadership as a supervisor over non Christian’s at my job. Thanks Mark! I am excited for this new channel!

[@enrikefranco8725]

I just noticed this is your new channel for Christian Men. Glory to God! These are things we need to hear in today’s world. God bless you men 🙏🏼🙌🏼☝🏼💪🏼

[@migcutio9770]

Mark I'm glad you posted the video, a lot of guys need to hear this. God revealed to me that being nice does not help anyone, it doesn't help you or the people around you because it can also lead to pandering to other parties, instead of holding your ground on something. Especially when it comes to dating, being "nice" to a woman - men need to state what their expectations are to a woman from the beginning.

[@anthony.rontong9063]

Truly insightful,drew alot from this message. The Lord will help us.

[@CPTCHRIS1]

I spent my hole life trying to be above nice and it’s been very negative and depressing in a world that need’s divine justice.

[@lawrencelawrence7638]

Amen. Subscribed.

[@ironmatto3]

I've been burned too many times by being too nice and passive, I'm seeing the types of abusers you will find, especially in the church. I hate conflict and try to be at peace with others but it comes at the cost of my self-respect. Thanks for this.

[@TommyZeus-i8n]

Never forget that true love is sacrifice and doing what is necessary.

[@Don-sy7mg]

Man that was perfectly said. Good stuff brotha🙏🏽

[@Doubleaa500]

So amazing to hear how to use the Word in real life!! Thank you for your channel!!

[@jnm-eh6qt]

This is right on time. I'm teaching our men's group at church next week and was struggling to find a subject. This will be very timely.

[@Kherian888]

A good reminder of our role in this society as godly men. Don't get confused : cowardness is not kindness. You are all supposed to be warriors for your King, for Christ, for God. Thank you brother.

[@EagleMan_22]

the German shepherd vs. Golden retriever analogy really puts this truth in perspective

[@run4fun143]

Respect is non unconditional, rude is a matter of perception that can often come from the opposing persons insecurities. Love the dog analogy. If a man is incapable of being violent, hes incapable of leading any masculine role.

[@AWDTH1111]

Yeah this is a hard one because I'm actually an over "correctionist". My natural state is to be rude, cold, explosively aggressive and angry. So being nice is how I avoid that. I'm either one extreme or the other.

[@haghendowdy4750]

find the strength to be kind

[@mr.gentry160]

This video to me explains a lot of the reasons, if not the main driving force, to many of the current ideologies that are opposed to Christian values and beliefs.

[@lukethekuya]

Praying for you! This video opened my eyes on what I should do first before meeting the One.

[@MaskedRiderChris]

I came here curious as to what you meant and came away with plenty of food for thought. When I was young and foolish, I craved acceptance and that didn't happen, and this gave me insight as to why that was. These days, I focus on being the best person I can be without being too much a pushover (I can always do better in that realm) and this was interesting to listen to. Good words, and thank you, sir.

[@TroyM777]

Thank you for this breakdown! This video is excellent and very very true how we uphold ourselves as men.

[@Iamabyabraham]

All my years I tried to be nice. Today only I get to know the difference between nice and kind.❤

[@ericdavenport1414]

Video watched at 7:55am Wednesday morning .. first time ever watching this footage it was very much on point I’m so grateful of the message which really hit home thanks a million because I fall in to that nice Christian guy category so it really helped me out a lot . Have a blessed day..

[@fabianpatrizio2865]

TRUTH is the highest virtue....not being 'nice'

[@famousarmystudio]

This reminds me of the movie Roadhouse where the main character is a well respected bouncer at a bar, and he tells the bouncer staff "always be nice until its time not be nice". It's basically the definition of being kind.

[@Plans4YouJer2911]

Yes Yes Yes

[@Light84736]

Thank you for speaking about this!! Some Christians need to hear this, unfortunately.

[@Gods-bad-boy]

If you're struggling with this go to a jujitsu class. Try and go at least once. Everyman needs to know what it's like to get your a**kicked!!! Being so utterly humbled by defeat, you will meet the real you. P.S. Boxing does it too. However it's a bit harder. But if you've never punched someone and got punched your missing out on a great gift.

[@mmafan8861]

💯💯

[@KEW-pd1jn]

Be kind one to another, tender hearted forgiving of each other!

[@silvergray2345]

This really blessed me with knowledge regarding the nice guy syndrome. I, like so many women, have used the "he's so/really nice" phrase. The thing is what else should we be drawn to in a man of God. This brings clarity in that area and I pray it does the same for men. Thank u! God's continued blessings for u and yours in Jesus Holy name

[@pharaohcaesar]

You're exactly right!😀

[@goodattitude7542]

So many guys are considered nice guys when they are actually just good guys. A good man should always be willing to fight for good and protect his family and friends.

[@CalledForDuty]

This is so good and 💯 percent true people listen to this man. I'm 36 and seen it over and over, "nice" guys women deep down despise and men do not respect. People will walk ALL over you of you don't set boundaries. This really made me not like Christianity in the beginning because I didn't want to be nice to these demons. But actually the right way is Kind not nice like he said. I'll be kind to you of you're kind to me but the very second you cross a line you will be dealt with 🙏✝️ #ChristisKing

[@blessingthegoat]

You are right man we as man are meant to build and expand on this earth and lay the foundation for the generations to come

[@bikerboy9010]

This is an excellent and informative video. I 100% agree with what you were discussing in this video. I believe people should be nice, kind, etc to other people, I believe people should live by the golden rule, I believe people should treat other people with respect, I believe people shouldn't be mean to other people, etc, but at the same time, people shouldn't be pushovers, people shouldn't be doormats, people shouldn't let other people walk all over them, people should stand up for themselves when they're being treated unfairly, etc.

[@jonnyturtleneck7153]

It doesn’t matter if you’re nice or not. There are good/bad, rich/poor, smart/dumb nice people. It’s about competence and opportunity.

[@krisjones4051]

It actually does. Being “nice” is related to high agreeability which is a good predictor of lesser life outcomes for men.

[@davidn4608]

The best KZbin channel for Christian men. God bless you, Mark!

[@DS-lh1dh]

I'm a nice guy.. I show kindness and mercy.. But God doesn't want us to just lay down and take people's junk either.. You have to stand up for God and our family's and be ready to defend our wives and children.. But being a true man is getting to be rare.. When a country takes God out of everything that includes being a true man then we get what we are witnessing these days.. I will be bold as a lion.. But be merciful and be kind also.. Be strong and courageous

[@THISISLolesh]

Don’t let anyone tell you not to be nice.. The whole new testament is Christ basically telling you to be good. You’re just a holy man in sodom, it’s not you, its the world we’re in. Don’t let people using the word for their own gain to change you into something you’re not. Be merciful, just as your father is merciful.. You’re literally called to be kind and merciful. Is that not one of Gods traits?

[@fatbaldguy7166]

Well said ! If the world is your/my friend then we are not doing it right. TRUTH HURTS and we must have mercy on those who are hurting , but must be a forceful beast against those who hurt the sheep. Mankind will not like truth being preached but it must be preached !!!!

[@ramonsmith3706]

I agree, but god definitely does not call us to be violent specially to defend our families anymore. As weird as it sounds it's not our job to protect our families, but it's our job to trust in the lord to protect us. And at least give us the wisdom to do that. But never does this mean harming another human being to do so. Mathew 10:16 “Look, I am sending you out as sheep among wolves. So be as shrewd as snakes and harmless as doves." Such a powerful verse.

[@My_God_is_Jahovah]

Oftentimes, immediate niceness is malicious. "Mr Nice Guy" is often worthy of suspicion.

[@joshuacorbin221]

Find the word flattery in the Proverbs and the context is deceit.

[@Donavon551]

Had to hear this, especially for work . Good lesson. Thank you.

[@eclipse4eva]

Keep these coming, you have not said one thing anyone can disagree with. Men need this today.

[@tombr12345]

Scriptures mention a different approach than what you mentioned at the 3:35 minute mark. Christ teaches to love your enemies and bless those who are persecuting you. Also He teaches to turn the other cheek. If they ask you to walk one mile with them, walk two. If they ask you for your coat, give them your shirt. Give without expecting anything back in return. I’m just curious on your interpretation of these different verses and how we should act according to scripture

[@freedomdude5420]

This is one of the most misunderstood verses in the Bible, it is context of weak where it is misuse, which Jesus didn’t said, was refer to negative reactions that people get high off and more important be illness individuals.

[@jasminehicks2082]

Wow Mark love your videos! This really was helpful as a Christian woman because I used to feel bad for turning down nice guys. I wanted a Christian man who was a leader provider and protector. A man that is kind and also could protect the family if he needed to. I always said I just don't feel safe when with just a nice guy. I've been praying to God for a man that has a lion in him and a lamb in him and knows when and how to move. Everything you said is so helpful to me as I choose a biblical strong man as God called them to be. I love God's original design to God be the glory for your leadership and guidance you help so many men and women. God bless 🙏🏽

[@p0ggles]

Love this channel! Thank you, Mark!

[@e.t.watchman5142]

THANK YOU FOR MAKING THIS WE AS MEN NEED TO KINDLY NOT LET OURSELVES BE STEAMROLLED BY EVERYONE DONT MISTAKE KINDNESS FOR WEAKNESS..THERE ARE TIMES TO DEFEND YOURSELF OR OTHERS ..ESPECIALLY AGAINST CRIMINALS

[@wonderingchild1]

This is one of the best explanations I’ve ever heard, on a true Godly masculine man! I was in a relationship with a “nice guy”. He was VERY likable, he loved ppls attention! He was funny, charismatic. But there was a situation that happened, where I was talked down to by a man that was with his family at an outside restaurant years ago! I politely stated we were here first… I was clearly in the right! But I waited for him/nice guy, to speak kindly the truth… basically what I said, but crickets! The guy was arrogant and aggressive to me from the jump! Not trying to start a fight or anything, like I said he was with his family! He was a jacka$$!! I felt sick to my stomach that the guy I was with, said NOTHING! I lost ALL respect then and there! You are 100% correct!

[@Plans4YouJer2911]

Wow A Super Great Video Grew up in a Christian home Mother was always saying to be nice, turn the other cheek, no fighting Father (supposedly) was mentally, emotionally, verbally doing regular put downs and sometimes name calling He's dead ... don't miss him She lives far away and I keep Very Strong Distance boundaries with her Been told by some women that I was / am too nice I have peeled away alot of "dead onion" skin's from my past Keep moving forward guy's

[@richardbarton6146]

I agree. If you are too nice, you will be looked at as weak and easy to take advantage of.. and men will not respect you!

[@davidbriggs6086]

Nice is what you get when someone is too weak to be good. It takes strength to be kind and gentle. And no mercy to the man or woman who mistakes their kindness for weakness. As Churchill said, "You have enemies? Good! It means you stood up for something."

[@femiadegbayi1461]

Can you do a specific video on how exactly Jesus’ life reflected the character of a true man? With specific examples of situations in the Bible where he didn’t act like the “nice” guy. Sometimes I struggle with being too nice because it looked like Jesus was a nice man who was welcoming/tolerant and had compassion for everyone

[@luciferlucero]

How about when He hastily fashioned a whip out of some cords and flipped over the tables of the money changers and chased them and the other merchants and livestock out of the temple, like a complete maniac? Jesus was no joke and he was nothing nice. He was extremely kind. The kindest, in fact. 👊🏽

[@danbixler4021]

And also when He had to deal with the Scribes and Pharisees. He used harsh words and condemned them for their behavior. Jesus was a lion when He needed to be and a lamb when He needed to be.

[@luciferlucero]

@@danbixler4021 💪🏽

[@vshah1010]

I don't know if Jesus dated any woman. Did Jesus ask a woman on a romantic date? If Jesus didn't date a woman, you can't take anything from his character and apply it to dating.

[@mzj2998]

Checkout Matthew chapter 17, versus 14-20. Almost hilariously, Jesus expresses his frustration with those of little faith and grumbles at the incompetence of his own disciples. Basically saying how long should he have put up with them

[@seanivrymusic]

great video. more men need to think this way.

[@user87410]

Wait, I didn't know you had a second youtube channel 🤔

[@alexvig2369]

I completely agree with you. And I am *sick* of how in churches today pastors and elders encourage men to be weak. Kind David is also one of my favorite examples. Also, Abraham was just a savage. He was NOT an old man who just prayed all day, like the church teaches. He was a chief his own tribe with his personal army - which he absolutely used - and a diplomat/statesman.

[@shanecle]

I think you should change the word in the title. "Nice" literally means pleasant, polite, gentle and good-natured. There is nothing wrong with that. I would use the word "weak".

[@EJ_Khan]

Thank you for this wisdom. Learned the hard way of being too nice. Instant regret, but the Lord did wake me up and used my pain for His glory to bring me closer to Him.

[@cristianarellano1141]

My eyebrows have a mean look 😢😂

[@stever507]

🤨like that

[@henryksiemoniuk1802]

It's better to be kind and cordial than nice and polite.