Will Homeschooling Hinder My Child's Socialization?

[@fruitfulmotherhood]

This is reassuring, Fr. Peter. We home educate our children but we dont know any other home educating Orthodox families, so we dont socialise much except at Church. May all children and my own be blessed.

[@HollyMD71]

I was Protestant but knew I didn’t need to send my babies off to the Public schools here so I’ve homeschooled for 25 years. My last baby is in 7th grade and I’ll be done. Even though things didn’t turn out quite like I had hoped with some of my kids I wouldn’t change a thing. I have great memories with my kids and when we converted to Orthodoxy in 2020 5 out of 6 of my kiddos (and spouses) converted with us! But I feel like homeschooling even more so today is necessary. I had a pastor tell me one time he sends his child (8 at the time) to be a light in darkness. To me that’s like sending an untrained soldier into battle with no armor. In the end my oldest was sucked into the world after joining the military. If I could change anything it would have been advising him to wait just a couple of years. He was too young for war and it has at this time stolen his life but I will never give up on him to come home to God. :)

[@HollyMD71]

Forgot to mention my grandbabies are now being homeschooled. So proud of my my girls for picking up the torch!

[@Aaron.T2005]

Who says you can't get your child into sports. My pastor always says sports are a good thing for Christians, since it teaches hierarchy, discipline, self control, and many other traits Christians need. Also, it has a great social aspect to it. You don't have to send your child into a public school cesspit of degeneracy for them to learn to "socialize" with people who are being taught by the system to be worse socially. I'm 18, I don't see any social skill in anybody at my school, but when I go to baseball, I meet some of the best, most socially able people. With the rise of secular godlessness in our school system, I see homeschooling for my future children as the best option.

[@billybenson3834]

People hate purity and find it abnormal

[@reinettekemp2618]

Spot on!! Children should be with their parents. You also keep little plants in a green house before planting it outside, where it gets protected from storms and winds etc.

[@mcolby7214]

I think the most ironic point out of someone wanting public school socialization is that my generation (early 00's) and on doesn't even act in a community. They just go to bars and clubs

[@thomasjefferson7584]

Top comment

[@andys3035]

Excellent points Fr. Peter. This world, our society and its ways are sick, polluted and spiritually diseased. The church is the hospital so vitally needed. Lord have mercy on us sinners.

[@MaryMary-yz5gv]

Something I struggle with is getting my kids involved in sports. We did that this past year and the 7-9 year old group was not a good influence. They were saying things that were shocking, and the parents were worse.

[@olgathehandmaid]

Thank you for this wisdom of Father Peter Heers who works tirelessly to shepherd us all.

[@HickoryDickory86]

Thank you so much for making these points, father! People, even Christians, have a very skewed (mis)understanding of socialization today. But believe it or not, I remember reading various studies that have been done on this topic, and they have consistently found homeschooled children to be among the best socialized when compared to conventionally schooled children. And it's precisely due to the factors you have pointed out in this video. (1) Standard schooling groups children by age groups, which severely breaks down any semblance of socialization from the get-go. (2) Homeschooled children, however, are frequently interacting with others from various age groups, especially if they are involved in church groups and ministries (and many homeschool families are Christian) and educational co-ops (homeschool families getting together semi-regularly to share advice, resources, team teach/tutor, etc.).

[@paisios2541]

PTSD: Post Traumatic School Disorder

[@williamsmith5049]

I don't know how anyone is fooled by the socializing lie. Schools were already terrible when I was a kid and only getting worse today. I feel sorry for anyone who just takes the word of secular government officials without any thought or study. My children are socialized at home, at home school co-op's , and finally and preferably in parish life. We monitor closely who they are around and what they are watching and listening to. My kids are bonded to myself and my wife, not to their peers. The far left extremists aren't having kid's but they don't have to, they just take ours when we fail because other things take our time up and are more important to us. So now more than ever it's key to take responsibility for your children and make them a priority of your life in actions and not just discussion. Edit: specified what officials I meant

[@irinitsoulfas833]

Thank you so much Father Peter !😊

[@paulhudson4254]

Retired counselor: There are many negative things to influence your children in public education far worse than lack of socialization! Home school or private Christian education if you can!

[@Metoches]

Blessings Father, you could not have said it better. May God give you strength.

[@Toripusutashi]

I went to public school and I can assure you it most likely made me hate modern society and how people are more than if I'd been home schooled

[@justian1772]

Thanks, Father!

[@paulk8072]

This is great advice.

[@qparxiii]

I try to tell my friends' kids, in 20 yrs from now whatever is "cool" now will be corny then. Secular friends also backstab and get jealous the better you do. Loners get extremely talented at their hobbies or jobs and those fake friends will want to denigrate your self esteem. When you start liking girls, they won't care about how good you are at video games or other immature things. God can make you a lion amongst hyenas by dedication. I have to admit, not having siblings or strong personal role models severely dampened my ability to converse casually especially with women. They need strong Christian networking and not take family and church for granted. Secular people act cool and accomplished but they secretly covet in emptiness or bitterness almost always

[@susiewiebe1019]

This is so on point!! I literally talked about home schooling our children at church last Sunday,and was told by an older women our children need to socialize with other children. I've desired to home school but unfortunately my husband doesn't agree. We are converts to the greek orthodox church. We come from the Old Colony Mennonite faith. No one in our perish seems to understand me. Mennonites dress very modest but orthodox christian women dont!!That's always been very hard for me as a mother. Thank you Father for all your work! I always listen to your videos on KZbin God bless!

[@FirstnameLastname-py3bc]

God bless you

[@sofijaantzaras4970]

Russian churches tend to dress and behave more modestly than Greek churches in my experience (I am born and raised Serbian Orthodox). I would put Serbs in the middle of those two, slightly closer leaning to Russians. Maybe switch parishes? Not every parish will be so modernized as yours that youre describing. Hope you find a more understanding community.

[@SucksTobeme289]

Why would you want them to fit in with this demonic society?

[@thomasshimelis2712]

thank you

[@cunncha]

It makes total sense that kids can't learn to socialize with respect around other kids alone, that's how you get them to talk on equal ground with adults, a big no no.

[@barkobunga2276]

4:35 I can't emphasize this enough. Growing up I've noticed how my public schooled peers cannot interact, or struggle to interact with those of a different age group.

[@Idyllicacrylix]

Fr Peter, please pray for my daughter Marina. Her father is fighting me in court and doesn’t want her to go to our orthodox school. The court wants her in the nearest public school. They don’t even want me homeschooling

[@OrthodoxEthos]

God will not abandon her!

[@randomanda]

What does your daughter want? Is there any chance to make a deal with the father outside of court? Is it that he doesn’t want to pay for it- can you manage it without his help? I’ve heard it’s extremely tough to win this one- the court is going to want to force public school, even in states that have very few regulations on homeschooling. You could see if you have a local chapter of HSLDA to help you. I’m sorry you’re having to go through this and I hope it works out in your favor but if it doesn’t do remember that it doesn’t mean you have no influence whatsoever over how you’re daughter turns out. Keep close communication with her. And maybe consider being involved in changing things at her school! Best wishes.

[@livinglikeahuman7918]

I didn’t know I needed this!

[@coldjello8436]

Algorithm boost.

[@Football0Lover]

Awesome

[@billybenson3834]

Amen

[@M00dtoohard]

Thank you for the lecture Father! For context, I’m only 15 and I just came from an Atheist background looking into Orthodoxy. I’m sorry if my question is already evident, but if I became a parent, would it be appropriate to educate my children on the evils of the world so that they will seek to not become corrupted? Or should I shelter them so as to not be the one polluting my children? For example, the culture around teaching sexuality to children has become very different nowadays. How can I approach my children on these topics without alluding them to commit these sins?

[@LukeGarrow]

There should be a book: "Parenting Wisdom from the Villages". All this knowledge is going to be forgotten soon I fear. I feel like it's not discussed in the writings of the Saints that much because it was so obvious to them, or if it is there, often you have to read between the lines to find it. But what was obvious to everyone back in those days is now considered insanity by the modern man

[@elizabethstrahan4535]

NO! The children and teachers your children interact with in public school will hinder their socialization.

[@ashleyharwell5289]

Would you mind talking more about homeschooling? We’ve been homeschooling our three children from the beginning and I feel like I’ve been failing them in their education. I struggle with consistency. I planned on sending them to a homeschool hybrid school three days a week. My main concern is that it is a Protestant Christian curriculum they use. Would you advice against this? Thank you so much for your talks, they have been very helpful.

[@FirstnameLastname-py3bc]

One of things I have heard from him on this topic is that he himself had teachers hired for specialized stuff, middle school and above

[@s.g.435]

❤

[@semperviren674]

I would love to read the story of St Yakobus but can't find the book. Help 🙃

[@Publius-24]

Homeschooled children rarely get shot in public school.

[@kev-la-kill9673]

How would you deal with non-orthodox and secular family members. I dont have children, yet, but I can already see having difficulty because my sister is a tattooed lesbian with a wife and everyone else in my family are atheists, except my Catholic mother. Thank you for your advice, Father.

[@Ag-wu4mi]

It depends on the kid and how they are raised at home. If the parents are pious and live and breathe Orthodox Christianity the kids can handle some exposure the the world.

[@FirstnameLastname-py3bc]

Exposure and getting raised in a bad community is different

[@Ag-wu4mi]

@@FirstnameLastname-py3bc I agree. If parents live and breathe Orthodoxy go to as many services as possible. Read the Bible together and the lives of the Saints Then children see how important it is. It will strengthen them against many temptations and they will cherish the Faith.

[@semperviren674]

I wonder what are some good homeschooling curriculum. I have been using Waldorf but as of lately I am starting to disagree with the pedagogy

[@dragoncyprus633]

In Cyprus it is illegal to homeschool

[@OrthodoxEthos]

So too, Greece. But people are doing it anyway.

[@gilgamesh7652]

The real question is, do people can afford it?

[@HHedda]

Actually as a Muslim I respect your modesty because most other Christians lost that. I love your analogy of the growing tree. I am sorry to hear you actually know nothing about Islam. We are actually not that different accept that you worship Jesus (peace be upon him) and the saints more than God himself and Muslims love Jesus as a Prophet (and Messiah) of God and don't have saints (accept for a minority group). Muslims worship only the Creator and pray only to the Creator. Men and women dress modestly and we are completely monotheistic as our God the Creator is uniquely ONE. He is the same God Jesus in Aramaic must have called Alah or Alaha or even in Hebrew Eloh(im).

[@OrthodoxEthos]

Thank you for your message. Muslims do reject the Lord Jesus Christ as God Incarnate who became man for our salvation and who was crucified, died, and resurrected from the dead. One cannot say they have respect for Christ while denying his death, resurrection, and divinity. We do not worship the Son (Jesus) more than the Father but worship the Holy Trinity as Father, Son and Holy Spirit, one God. In 1 John 2:23, Jesus said, “Whoever denies the Son does not have the Father either; he who acknowledges the Son has the Father also.”

[@colmwhateveryoulike3240]

Socialising in school is far from ideal. Sitting in rows isn't social. So the only real social time is an hour at lunch and maybe a half hour going to and from school. This argument is a silly one.

[@emilylloyd1684]

I disagree. We are raising children who will have go out into the world with people they don't know and manage to get along. This child will one day have to work a job with people in all walks of life, they will have to be able to connect with people to get by.

[@nicko9046]

He said that's fine, but only AFTER they are well rooted in virtue and the faith, and presumably all other good stuff.

[@nilssteyaert6295]

So you're actually asking us to create something akin to a sect? Not every parish priest seems to agree with this approach, and personally I wonder if those 'deeply rooted' Orthodox will be able to cope with the world once they have to make a living and are thrown in the trenches. Keeping our kids away from sin is not going to teach them about sin. It's a war out there, every second. We need warriors. And this is assuming this kind of sect-formation would even be possible, because especially in the non-Orthodox world there are very little Orthodox people, and they are thinly spread. In our parish, nobody is much interested in socializing. After H. Liturgy everyone just wants to get out asap and go home. The few times we met with other Orthodox, their educational methods were worse than what we saw in the 'world'. More screen time, more absent parents, and a lot of gossip about the church. There is such a deep disconnect between what the church is saying vs reality.

[@OrthodoxEthos]

Our experience is much different