Writing Asexual Characters

[@drinkerofpaint]

"Your asexual character doesn't have to be awkward or nerdy" ha, mine's badass. I'm thinking about having a chapter where the main protagonist is helplessly and slightly drunkly using lines on ladies in a bar and she's juse egging him on and laughing at his failure.

[@AmeliaAce]

That sounds awesome!

[@drinkerofpaint]

I REALLY want to be an author

[@AmeliaAce]

SheThinks WithPortals trust me, I know the feeling!

[@drinkerofpaint]

AmeliaAce shethinkswithportals.tumblr.com/post/114079430966/crappy-comic-i-made-for-college-the-characters If you're interested

[@slimymoth]

I am literally the most flirtatious asexual person ever

[@ebell1960]

same

[@Jaydove2387]

Clearly you haven't met me yet, princess.

[@cockadoodledoostudios2778]

Heeey there, umm... nice butt? *whispers to friend* am I doing this right? No? Crap

[@somebodysomeone453]

J.M. Barrie, the author of Peter Pan maybe was asexual too but oh did he flirt with the most beautiful women!

[@charliebloom3546]

Berta Berta why would they flirt any differently to a person of a different sexuality?

[@JustAPotterhead]

I am writing a book with my two best friends, a longer project, and "my character" is going to be asexual, but she is super outgoing, super flirty and fucking hardcore. It's going to be great.

[@taybaaziz6190]

Is it available to read?

[@GrayTimber]

I have a few asexual characters, and I really can't wait to get them out there to not only raise representation, but also because I think they're lovable and should be seen by the world. c: +1 support for asex representation

[@RhysezPieces]

I love loveable characters of all sexualities! Gay bfs are such sweeties in non-sexualized stories it makes me wanna hug em!

[@RhysezPieces]

And in sexualized ones, I'm just a bit uncomfortable in sexy stories. -.-

[@silversleeper1193]

Hallelujah to your point about the plot not having to be about asexuality just because the character is asexual. I read a ton of fanfiction, and I have yet to find a fic where the character is specifically named as ace without the entire plot being "THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF ASEXUAL." All other fanfics I've read where the characters are straight, gay/lesbian, bi, even pan, may have it as a side plot but always some other bigger storyline. I'm loving your videos, by the way. I hope you continue! :)

[@AmeliaAce]

Haha, yeah, when I started writing fanfic about asexuality even i was guilty of doing that. But the best asexuality fics use asexuality as a side plot. Thanks for liking my videos :3

[@VioletEmerald]

AmeliaAce argentsleeper I'm basically writing a whole book-length fanfiction story now where asexuality is the whole plot. I've already done one oneshot fanfic story where demisexuality was a side plot, and in the future, I might do more fics where various characters just happen to be ace but that's not the point of the fanfic... but I feel like I need to start off where I spell things out to readers, and where the characters go through the big deal discovery process just like I went through a big deal discovery process, and where I really clearly explain asexuality to the readers who don't understand/know about the sexual orientation yet. Later, I can write the fics where a character is asexual yet the plot isn't focused on that. That's my philosophy, anyway. argentsleeper, you'd probably hate the long fanfic I'm writing now that's not using it as a side plot, but rather as the main plot, but it's what I feel inspired to write, so it's what I'm doing.

[@AmeliaAce]

That seems fair enough, and if you do it well, then good for you :)

[@24601dftba]

luvtheheaven5 I'm so sorry if I implied these kinds of stories are bad. I actually think they are very important, as fiction is one of the things that helps us shape our world, and for someone struggling with their own sexuality or learning about someone else's, it's important to have stories they can relate to. I was merely trying to say I wish there were more of a variety of stories beyond that. Good luck with your fic! :)

[@VioletEmerald]

Thanks, that's very kind of you, 24601dftba . I agree. Variety is everything and having a large array of types of stories with asexual characters is so important. I do agree.

[@j.l.franklin5669]

Yes! You hit it right on the head! I've said the same thing about writing "strong female characters". The key? Don't write "strong female characters". You run the risk of creating a caricature, as opposed to a good, fleshed out character. Sit down, create a solid character, with a beautiful world around them, and only then can you achieve your goal. Great work!

[@kukalakana]

Indeed. I've always said I hope the first openly gay character in my favourite sci-fi franchise (star trek) is less a "gay character" and more a "character who happens to be gay".

[@RhysezPieces]

Yeah, I think instead of treating the character like the biggest deal for a certain attribute (whether or not it's a big deal to your readers) will only harm the character. Instead, create a new norm for your story and let them just be "A girl who just happens to have a strong personality" or "A guy who just happens to have a boyfriend".

[@stefaniesioux8274]

What age did u first relies u were asexual? Because I think I am asexual but I'm only 14 and I'm not sure if I'm too young to know (does this sound silly) 😥

[@kukalakana]

It's not silly. For myself I started thinking I might be asexual at about the same age, but at that point (early 1990s) there wasn't really an existing label to describe what I was. People only ever really learnt about straight, gay, or bi. So that is what we assumed we had to be. It was not until •after• I lost my virginity many years later that I fully realised I must be asexual after all. (And just after that when I came across some sort of confirmation of my suspicions that there even was such a thing.) If you decide for now that you are asexual, and that turns out not to be true, then know that for many people, particularly teenagers, finding out your sexuality is a journey, and one which may lead you in surprising directions. Many gay people can reach their 30s and then find out that they are bi, or apparently straight people not realise they are ace until they reach 35 or 40. The reverse is also true. I don't think it will happen to me, because I know from experience that sexual intercourse is just going through the motions. But it happens. My point is, sexuality is not something you can separate into rigid and incompatible categories. It is not set in stone. It is fluid and personal and what you decide now will not bind you for the rest of your life. Best of luck.

[@stefaniesioux8274]

+kukalakana thank you😊😊

[@audreyl.4876]

I know this is really a late response, but I realized I was ace when I was 14 too.

[@drinkerofpaint]

That's so odd! I was just thinking about how to bring up that one if my characters is ace in a kind of casual relevent way the ither day! Thanks for the video ^-^

[@kindbloodedArlanna]

This is awesome! I'm actually starting to write a fanfiction with asexual characters, isn't that a coincidence?!

[@RhysezPieces]

Man, why have I never heard of you? This is awesome! Screw the haters. (I certainly wouldn't ;) ) This was some great info I'll be needing to help write my ace gal. She's my main character and she technically was gay, but having me as an author made her a gay-asexual. So I'm trying to make her as fulfilling as possible without taking up too much of my story in telling her love tale with her gf. You got yourself a follower 4 life!

[@purplefire2834]

I read Quicksilver before knowing that the main character was ace. When I read that, I was like "OMG YES A GREAT BOOK WITH A BELIEVABLE ACE CHARACTER!!!!!!!!!!"

[@medeaworbs6970]

I am currently working on basics, plotting, collecting information etc. for my newest book, and my Gods, am I glad to have found your video!!!

[@maxjohn610]

my mc and love interest are both ace and both guys 💜

[@mxmothmanart]

Before I knew I was asexual, I had a main character I do identify with the most out of my various leads, and I realized that she was stubbornly aro-ace even before I specifically had those words (first exposure was DW w/ TenRose as relationship goals). This worked out for the story very well bc I wanted to focus on her family and platonic relationships as the personal drama of the work (it's an original superhero comic). Unless otherwise noted, I don't usually assign or even consider my characters' preferences. My aforementioned MC's only came up bc I wanted to write a future timeline that included her daughter. :D

[@vixenwolf2113]

I'm aromantic and asexual too lol.

[@Jaydove2387]

I have a biromantic asexual character and an aromantic asexual character in my story. I'm biro ace myself and I have aro ace friends.

[@humantimelord5546]

4:33 please say that was a reference to a book called radio silence, there is also an ace character in that book

[@Ranahi_Itma]

Thank you for helping us narrowing it down, I don't want to be writing the character to always openly say "Im asexual, I don't experience sexual attraction" like another character never says "Im gay, I'm attracted sexually to the same sex". I want to demostrate my character as asexual but not being this emotionless, serious, stern person. Because I've heard a lot of people say that these personality traits are asexuality traits, which is sooo stupid, because I've read gay characters as stern, serious and very stoic yet they are gay and very allosexual. My character speaks her mind and very emotional, but she doesn't mind a half naked body, she just shrugs it off and walks away, laughs, unamused or skeptical when someone tries to flirt with her. And the person who falls in love with her is non-binary, bisexual and has a history of being very active with multiple people. She doesn't really express interest in him at first, like the way he does, but he is quite happy that she's very sweet to him and he always wants to be the person who she trusts. For me, that is true love💜

[@leahlichtenstein8319]

i have two ace characters they are my children as are all my characters

[@blankslate9599]

Aaahhh I'm so happy, my main character of my novel is asexual. It won't come up until she begins to grow closer to her love interest (who ultimately she won't end up with since she has bigger things on her plate) I'm probably expressing this in the worst way possible, but I'm asexual too so I know what I'm doing. It's not going to be made in to a big deal or anything, she will just pretty much say she doesn't want that kind of relationship and move on, even though she will have lingering romantic feelings about her love interest.

[@Sentariana]

I'm going to write fantasy story (with dragons, mermaids, fairies, pegasi and human with elemental magical abilities) which is going to have equality between genders (including transgenders) most importantly, races and sexuality. The main character and the secondary main character are both cis female, the third main character is going to be trans male, and the fourth main character cis male. The main character is going to be the character with most development throughout the book so she's going to start off shy with little self confidence, but still can be determined and brave but its not her first reaction, and dresses in generically boyish clothing in the female cut, and she's going to be Asexual (mostly because I'm Ace and I just can't imagine being another way well enough to make the main character so). Its very important to the storyline that she's shy with little self confidence, and her sexuality has nothing to do with that. Also, she's 14 so I doubt I'll actually directly mention she's Asexual, except in the Appendices or something, but it'll be constant. The secondary main character is important as her polar opposite in every way, as she's very self confident, passionate, with a fiery temper - she also happens to much sexual as she's pansexual, but again she's 14 so it'll be there but doubtfully realised yet. Unless I can get them to have a conversation about it - as their society is very open and accepting about sexualities. The third main character is important as the supporting, helpful, wise cracking, mischevious, down to earth and loyal best friend. He's following a completely different but connected career path to the other two. He's going to be Heterosexual (to clarify, because he's a trans guy, he's attracted to girls), but again not greatly mentioned just indicated as he's 14. The fourth main character starts off kind of bad, as he's from a family of "bad guys" so is negatively influenced by them, and the bad thing he does causes the whole story. He's a good, kind, generous, sensitive person really but its not his instant personification. Unlike the others he follows the main character out of guilt, he wants to right his wrong. I'm not sure what his sexuality is yet. The story is focusing more on breaking gender stereotypes and having gender equality, sexuality and race (I didn't mention their race because I didn't think it was important but I have variety) are more in the background but they are always there. What do you think? Does my reasoning make sense? Any advice?

[@Tori0ri0ri]

This is very helpful, thank you! I am a writer, and I really want representation in my story. I don't want to misrepresent anything, no matter how well I think I understand something. Also- you've gained a new subscriber today! :)

[@mikeman7918]

I actually came up with a very in depth si-fi universe that I mostly use for role playing, the main character is meant to be largely based on me and when I do role playing in that universe I always play that character. I made him be asexual long before I realized that I actually am asexual (and I also made him atheist long before I ditched religion). In this case he actually is socially awkward because he is autistic (like me IRL).

[@Cage-CatYT]

This is gonna help major time. I'm making a Team Fortress 2 fan fiction that's a slice of life type of thing, and my oc Nurse is ace but I didn't wanna make it the main thing.

[@rexventura4603]

I’m writing a comic where 3 out of the four main characters are asexual, two being Aromantic, and the third having an asexual gf, so this is useful thanks

[@kateoneill4983]

I have tips to write my character and a new series to read!

[@indi-go1868]

Thanks for the recommendation, I'll check the book out!

[@MegumiMary]

I have an Ace/Aro character in the second arc of my book series and it comes up when he's reconnecting with an old friend who points it out for him. i actually have a cleaver way of using his Asexuality as a road block during his character arc. (No spoilers but it's really clever, at least it would be if Disney had not beaten me to the punch twice now) he also says "Aces" when he's really excited about something, something I myself am starting to do :p

[@Aardydarling]

Have you read Radio Silence by Alice Oseman? Always a good book to check out if you’re looking for asexual representation.

[@night1shade]

Tj klune "how to be normal" one of the main characters is ACE very funny book. Great writer

[@harrilahti-luopa5953]

What about Sherlock Holmes or Mandrake

[@lukasnovella9001]

I’m ace, but I don’t have very good aspec representation. I have a lot of canonically Ace (and a lot that can be interpreted as Ace cause I have a projection problem) but it’s not mentioned? Like- I write them as Ace but it never says they are. There are three characters that are explicitly Ace (and their all friends in a comedic story) and one of the jokes is that a sex demon can’t do anything to them, soooooooo that’s fun. I need to work on that...

[@gms9608]

So, Im writing three/two novels: -One with a gay couple, called Mi Little Star (Mi Pequeña Estrellita, since Im writing it in my mother tongue Spanish) -One with an ace/aro charachter -One with bisexual aliens an a bisexual protagonist

[@irinacd2537]

I have an idea for a story (I haven't actually started writing yet) and it would mainly revolve around clones and genetic engineering, blah blah. Point is, I have three main characters in mind - one's completely straight, unbent whatsoever; one is asexual and romance positive and that sort of I'll-kick-your-ass-if-you-get-me-mad-sweetheart; and the third one is aro/ace. And they're all clones (the first and the last are clones of the same person). Now, the thing with the aro/ace dude is that I really love him already and I want him to rock, but I'm not so sure whether I'm really doing such a good thing by writing him the way I want to. See, he's pretty much emotionless (at least in the beginning of the story), by which I mean emotionless on a psychopathic level (which I blame on his abusive youth). Naturally, some of the crazy scientists in my story will claim that Two (that's just his name) was always prone to develop the mental disorder because he was one of the earlier clones and genetic engineering messed up somewhere. At which point I am afraid that the reader will somehow make a link that was never intended to exist and conclude that asexuals and aromantics are all psychopaths and I don't know what to doooooooooo............... I believe I could use the romance positive asexual, who is perfectly healthy, to prove otherwise, but I have a feeling that it won't suffice... :/ I just watched your video about bad asexual representation and I don't want to be the cause of the uprising question on whether asexuals/aromantics are psychopaths. "Oh, hey, I'm aro/ace." "OMG, does that mean you're a psychopath?!" I'm really not up for something like that... So, yeah, sorry for the extremely long message. You're awesome, so I figured you'd be a good person to ask for advice :)

[@mynameswhatsername7879]

That sounds like a really cool novel idea! However, I could see it being taken the wrong way. Maybe you could include a minor character or two who are very different than the main guy and sociable?

[@Sentariana]

Yeah. That sounds like it can be taken the wrong way entirely. Definitely mention someone else who is Ace/Aro but polar opposite of him.

[@annas4392]

Thanks for the book plug!

[@ViridisArborem]

OH MY GOSH NEW BOOKS TO READ THAT ARE SCIFI YA WITH ACE CHARACTER YAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!!!!!!!

[@AmeliaAce]

Viridis Arborem I am such a fan of RJ Anderson's work, I highly recommend them.

[@itsmemisti]

as a writer i found this very interesting thank you

[@Ametcitra]

D: You are studying the exact thing I want to study :D I'm applying to schools right now, or well, have been applying.. Three out of five have turned me down v__v I hope I'll get into somewhere though ^^ I love writing. Speaking of which, I totally have an asexual character in my book :3 It's never mentioned outright. She does have a conversation with the other main about it because he keeps looking at and flirting with ladies and she calls him out on it and it kind of leads to hints about her not really experiencing sexual attraction, but I've purposefully not made it into a big deal because on the whole that's not what the story is about ^^

[@AmeliaAce]

Ametcitra Creative writing is one of the most competitive subjects to get into. But don't get so bogged down in rejections that you give up! Sometimes even straight English Lit courses have creative writing modules, if it come to that. Also, your book sounds great. i've written a lot of ambigiously-asexual characters in my time (normally by accident since I tend to write protagonists similar to myself). I think they're cool, but its always better if you're putting your work out to the world to make it explicit that they're asexual. Just because asexual characters are so scarce!

[@Ametcitra]

AmeliaAce Trust me :) My dream is to be able to study English Lit with Creative Writing, so I won't give up on it any time soon ^^ I shall keep it in mind to make it explicit, it sounds like a good idea :)

[@AmeliaAce]

Ametcitra I mean, nothings saying you HAVE to, it's your work after all. But it's good to consider. And yay! Us creative writers have gotta keep at it if we ever want to make it :3

[@Ametcitra]

AmeliaAce We really do :3

[@mynameswhatsername7879]

The narrator of my story is a heteroflexible guy named What'shisname, and he falls in love with a guy. I understand that being heteroflexible is not the same as bisexual, and so it's tricky to have him express a more dominant interest in girls (but still a noticeable attraction to guys) without making him look bicurious.

[@ebell1960]

Maybe you could mention he had a past boyfriend while having him in the present talk about girls romantically a lot?(If that made sense)

[@prehistoricwatergun0136]

Do what they did in bobs burgers ,have someone ask him if he's gay and have him respond by saying no I'm mostly straight.

[@mynameswhatsername7879]

Emily Bell​, Whitebread raps​ Thx for the response! I actually am using a combo strategy of both of those ideas. My character's friends question his sexuality a couple of times in the story, and he doesn't deny his attraction to guys at all but at same time, he expresses an interest in a female childhood friend before meeting the main love interest. I'm glad someone thinks similarly. Thx for the feedback.

[@andrewfield4072]

Great video. I'm no writer but this was still pretty enjoyable.

[@ToriLillytheauthor]

OOOHH THIS MAKES ME HAPPY

[@js-kn2sx]

SpongeBob is asexual😳

[@javieryus9]

My asexual character falls love with a siren and then with an old woman... it's a little awkard to me because I have my reasons to make each of those things, but It does look like I'm exaggerating the asexuality thing. Any thought on that?

[@kukalakana]

Don't, don't, DON'T just is insert the word "asexual" into your story unless it bloody well belongs there! Nothing worse in a story than randomly shoving in some statement about sexuality or whatever else just for the sake of it. Show don't tell for fuck's sake!

[@sandersona756]

I agree 100%. It may come across awkwardly in many instances... (I know this comment is a year old haha...)

[@anjeanetteflorendo1533]

i was wondering, so like asexuals are not sexually attracted to people right? does someone who is not romantically attracted to no gender in particular fall under asexualism? or is that a whole nother thing? i do not intend to offend with this question i was just wondering

[@annak9096]

@Anjeanette Florendo Not being romantically attracted to anyone is called aromanticism. It can occur in people of any sexual orientation, though is (I think) slightly correlated with asexuality. The ace and aro communities are often lumped together, as they share many of the same problems. However, aro people aren't necessarily ace, and ace people aren't necessarily aro.

[@kairon156]

Asexuality has a stereotype? I only know of two or three people who posted on Face Book that they were asexual, and each one of them are quite different from the other. What your describing sounds more like the words nerd or geek use to mean.

[@harrilahti-luopa5953]

So many romantic orientation exist

[@keuringdienst2518]

you got undoomed