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Stream “camino santa fe” here: linktr.ee/ynap...
Earlier this year in March, I released one of the most vulnerable songs I’ve ever written and produced. To get vulnerable and real, it’s about the night I ran away from home and almost ended my life. The title of the song draws its origin from the street I was on when I was contemplating everything, “camino santa fe”.
I know it sounds counterintuitive to have written a song about such a tragic moment, but writing it was a way for me to document that boiling point in my life and give myself a reminder that it is merely a memory and I'm no longer there.
Around May, a few months after the single released, this talented Asian filmmaker, Cee Pham, dmed me if she could direct a music video for the song because it resonated with her. They are now one of my good friends and I am so honored to have crossed paths with her. I immediately said yes because I had wanted a visual representation of this story, but I couldn’t find the right ideas to execute such a raw song.
So Cee came with her crew, we shot for 2 days and my heart never felt so full to be a part of something so amazing. Cee’s vision for my song aligned so perfectly with what I wanted as they captured all the trauma, pain, and struggles I faced. To revisit and recreate a lot of the moments that led to that point in my life was a lot, but I was very grateful to be in the hands of an amazing crew that cared about me and what we were doing.
This music video encompasses familial trauma, depression, anxiety, and a plethora of emotions that can lead to such a turning point. And as a queer Filipina artist, I hope who I am and what I’ve made touches the hearts of those who are just like me or can relate.
With that being said, a thank you would not be enough to express the amount of gratitude I have for every single person who took part in this project. I also want to say thank you to every single person who streamed “camino santa fe'' since it was released. And thank you to my best friend back at home, Krystal, for finding me that night and saving me.
To those who resonated with the song, the message and the music video, my heart goes out to you. To be met with such a crossroads is not easy, and so I want you to know that I’m proud of you for still being here because you are loved and worthy. Always remember that (:
Song credits:
Producer: Yna
Mixing Engineer: Michael Leto
Mastering Engineer: Liam Reyes
Drums: Kobe Henderson
Strings. Anne Navarro
Cover Art: David Gould, Gwen McNally
Music Video credits:
Director: Cee Pham
Camera: Enrique Gaona
Producer: Dayana Enkhbataar
Editor: Bella Latenser
1st AD: Lauryn Rhodes
1st: AC: Calvina Li
2nd AC: Maddie Willis
Gaffer: Louis Alcade
Key Grip: AJ Holtel
Grip: Philip Zao, Michael Paris Stone
PA + loader: Polo
Production Designer: Hannah Strieber
Makeup Artist: Emme Freebeck, Dayana Enkhbaatar
Sound: Ren Lance
BTS: Andrew Louda
Actors:
Dad: Nico Jopio
Mom: Noelle Oh
Sister: Mia Arnoux
Friend: Maddie Willis
Extras: Polo, Philip, Lauryn, Emme