You Can’t Take Everyone with You

[@TheMinimalists]

Have you ever had to leave a friend behind?

[@dreylane]

I've had to leave my brother behind. We grew apart and he chose drugs over having a life.

[@eduardor0605]

Yes, not easy though

[@elaineclaire7063]

It gets hard when the bond becomes traumatic.

[@serenaemary9573]

At one point in my life I decided I'd rather have no friends than the ones that I finally saw were draining me, so I let them all go. I got fussier & life got better!

[@brandonanderson2066]

I had to leave behind many people. Never feels good in the short term. In fact I still miss many of them and wish them well. But it's impossible grow if you're spending time with people who aren't also trying to grow or interested in similar pursuits. Some people might even be toxic.

[@cecivnsa]

I was JUST having this conversation with my fiancé. We’re both in our late 20s and have a handful of close friends but we’ve been feeling like it’s time to put our distance between them. It’s been a hard pill to swallow but we were giving our time and energy into nurturing these friendships and haven’t felt very satisfied/not feeling reciprocated in the same ways. Friendships are hard to navigate, especially when you’ve past the “let’s just have fun and party” phase.

[@perrycoffey5410]

Advice for you if your a guy dont get married

[@shirleycombs2878]

Your true friends will be there without the party.

[@GoJojo-lv6zi]

@@perrycoffey5410 *Unsolicited advice for you

[@GoJojo-lv6zi]

@@perrycoffey5410 And literally empty *unsolicited advice. Were you planning to provide logical reasons why that are more than just emotional trauma dumping?

[@IM-eq9gx]

For those feelings of unreciprocated friendship? It's exactly what it is, and i just call those acquaintances.

[@Itallnew]

I have had to let go of several relationships and friendships that felt toxic. Sometimes friends grow in different directions because of what life experiences we have gone through…it changes and molds us into different people. It’s ok to say goodbye to things and relationships that no longer serve us in a positive way.

[@videohistorysnippets8963]

Wonderful conversation guys, I’ve followed your podcast for many years and I loved this idea of minimalism in my life, it’s still a work in progress for me it just doesn’t happen straight away, lots of hard work to adjust my mindset in living with intention. For now I’ve got money in my bank account which gives me freedom to do what I want when I want, so many items that I’ve removed from my life and I haven’t regretted even one day without them, it like I’ve removed stress and anxiety from my life and replaced it with a layer of living. This weekend we as a family have a garage sale to finally sell off stuff from my parents life that has been sitting just gathering dust, a new home for them to someone else who can make use of them, what a relief! Sending my love to all at The Minimalist ❤ Thanks so much.

[@silo3448]

A friend recently made the distinction for me between Kindness and Fairness. It’s not always possible to be kind to everyone all the time but you can attempt to be fair.

[@slpdx]

Favorite quote: "You can love people that don't go with you." It's harder to accept this non-acceptance with peers (not close friends) when you don't have access to their reasons why they don't accept you. My natural instinct is to go over all the possible reasons in my head and expect the worst, or do some light detective work to figure out why (without talking to the person), and this comes from a place of, "maybe if I knew and it is something I could truly benefit from working on/changing, I could find self-improvement." It seems like asking why they are seemingly ignoring or bothered by your presence would make it worse. This is obviously not always true, but in my head, it seems that the non-accepters would see this is as an additional people-pleasing behavior.

[@harvey1016]

I have several acquaintances but few friends. I just am not the type of person to be able to cultivate deep meaningful relationships and im ok with it.

[@j.m.ney-grimm3029]

This is amazing! I think I'm right in the middle of realizing that indeed I can't take everyone with me. So freeing to let go of this imperative. Thanks!

[@bertoldgerrychannel]

It takes more than average level of maturity to realize that we can't take everyone with us, even our loved ones. Nothing about maturity is easy. Erwin's closing statement is bold.

[@junleifa]

To quote Bilbo Baggins: "I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve."

[@dreylane]

Please let me know The name of the Special Guest's book. He's terrific!

[@daughterofmyabba]

It showed for a couple seconds at the start of the video "mind shift"

[@lihimizrahi5157]

I think it's a survival mechanism. Humans in the past could not survive alone, without being a part of a community and being accepted by one

[@srk--I]

Absolutely loved the podcast. ❤

[@louisepotier2784]

Thank-you. Interesting thoughts. Have a wonderful day. 🙂

[@alexsandereastmond7036]

love more use less 80% of what you own you only use 20% your either a creature of habit or creation of love peace hope and ❤️

[@ninazuninazu6123]

very nice

[@Bacciagalupe]

: )

[@6ixallah]

really needed to hear this