You Drove your Van into the Wrong Heart

So this time the rhyme scheme is simpler (all the lines are of the AABB type), but I've worked basically the same amount of time. Here's the lyrics:
Two, to the one, from the one, to the three
Greg Universe, it was me!
Let's set a course for fun!
He's my son.
Come to check out some buff studs?
If every porkchop were perfect, we wouldn't have hot dogs
cheery noise I'm a cherry man!
You're welcome. Get out of my van!
No one could ignore the universe.
Whoa! It's not like I can make it any worse.
You mind grabbing me a snack from the Big Donut?
Oh my gosh, Steven's a robot!
I'm a sand man! Maybe.
You're one cool baby.
Why did you let him climb that thing?
I sure am tired from doing a whole lot of nothin'.
Shtu-ball, I'm from here alright.
It's not like a six-pack is gonna save you from that height.
If I need something I'll just crawl.
Cannonball!
Call the police. How's baby life?
This massive drink of water is my wife.
What? Carabiner!
Your old man's still got it! I brought dinner.
Wrong one! So it's true.
Watch out for that! I'm not gonna hit you!
He's dead to me. Don't leave, waxing is free!
Where's my relaxing music CD?
It was about time Greg got a video dedicated to him. He's Rebecca's favorite character, after all!
Source: / cjw2d66