*God and thank you.

It will be one of the hardest things that you’ll ever experience but it can also be one of the most rewarding. Knowing that I was able to bring mom into a more stable environment and hold her hand through this difficult journey means the world to me. It’s not going to be easy but neither were things easy for her raising three boys on her own. She could’ve given up but she didn’t and neither could I. Stay strong. 💔

@@randygreen007 I'm living as they say " the long goodbye".... we do not want to put her in a nursing home as suggested so she stays between my home and then next door to my sister and her family ,she's 84 but she's had two strokes in the past year so you can imagine what that's done to her mentally and physically ...I'm literally laying here in the dark bawling as I do most of the time except when I'm with her of course I ran across your comment on the video BLANK STARES and it resonated with me deeply.. thank you for your kind words and understanding 🙏

@@sharonsimplysouthernI understand where you’re at. You will adapt and learn, you will scream and cry. This will change you. I don’t know what stage your mom is but being prepared as much as possible will benefit everyone. Feel free to ask questions or just know you’re not alone.

@@randygreen007 I've joined about four of the biggest dementia support to groups on Facebook and that helps a lot but I don't live in my hometown anymore unfortunately I'm from a small town in Tennessee and I moved two hours away to Virginia where my mom's at so this there's no one here I can talk to you it's such a small town and I don't have any friends up here like I did down in my hometown so I appreciate when I come across someone that has insight like you thank you so much again

Thank you that means a lot. I did everything I could but it still didn’t come close to the sacrifices mom made for us kids. I wish you could have met her. ❤

Thanks for stopping by. There’s a few videos of us here on KZbin. Unfortunately we lost Ms. Shirley a few years back and the pandemic really put a hurting on these events.

Thank you and it was a blessing to be trusted by the Almighty with her care during these difficult times. One which I’d gladly repeat again. ❤️

You speak the truth! I wish that you could’ve met her. ❤️

🙏🏻

You’re absolutely correct and what a joyous time that will be. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

Always the goal! 😉 I wasn’t always successful but that was the goal. I remember taking her to the drum circle over in Asheville one Friday so she could dance and have fun. Even though I was right beside her she darted off through the crowd and took off down the street like a little kid. I chased behind her and she stopped, turned around with such a fearful look on her face that it broke my heart. She was so lost and scared like a little girl. It wasn’t always easy but we made the best out of things.

@@randygreen007 🥰🤗

I ALWAYS looked forward to their visits. Yours too most of the time. 😉 JK Both your mom and dad were so helpful and understanding of our situation. They never judged me or pointed fingers but were two of the first family members to stand up for me. Right after mom that is. Any oh how they wouldn’t shut up about you girls! 😂 They loved you to the ends of the earth. Someday you’ll feel their warm embrace again. ❤️

@@randygreen007 Mom and Dad loved you so very much your situation is life humbling as with all things we go through in our lives. You stood strong and got through it. Thing is Randy hun your heart is loving and kind. You stayed to take care of your mom when no one else would or could, being a nurse i know how exhausting, stressful and heartbreaking that was. You inherited your strength and heart from your mom. I use to talk to Aunt Pauline on a weekly basis for years. I miss those days. I love you Randy and I hope you are taking care of yourself and having some fun cuz you deserve it 💕 one day we will see our loved ones again! Thank you for the beautiful videos you took and posted🤗

Interesting that Zeb went viral recently for one of his clogging dance steps. He was even invited to perform live at the CMA’s. Just look up Zeb Ross clogger if you’re interested.

Thanks and it was a fun filled day for sure.

@@randygreen007 it sure had the makin's...good weather, good folks and good ol' fashioned fun💗

Thank you and I agree, mom is smiling. Thank you for all your kindness and may your days ahead be filled with love and blessings.

Thank you and a very Merry Christmas to you as well! 🌟

There’s so many down in south Florida. Check on here for boat parades in Fort Lauderdale. They’re much bigger than this one. They even have elephants and a circus on one float.

When's the last time you indulged in that much exercise? I've no fear for the ladies cartio...

Thank you and I wish you could’ve known her. She was my rock and yes, you’re right that family should always be the most important people in our lives. 🙏

Thank you and she was definitely my rock!

She was an amazing lady. I’ll hold these memories close.

🙏❤️

She was indeed! Thank you so much! ❤️

She is going to become a person that you don’t recognize.💔 But you know who she is and who she was before this disease. Don’t let her future behavior take those precious memories away from you. It’s going to be up to you to decide how you’re going to deal with this. I can tell by the kind words you’ve written to me that it’s going to be an easy decision but it’s not going to be easy to go through. It’s also true that she will eventually reach a point where she doesn’t know you. Eventually she will likely lose her ability to form sentences and then her words all together. But you know what? She’ll never forget what a long, tight hug is, a handhold or even just a smiling face surrounding her with love! They never forget what laughter and excitement is. Cherish the moments that are remaining no matter what the circumstances. You’ll be glad that you did. They also recognize tears and the sad looks they get from people and unfortunately this can make their situation even worse. Make sure that everyone stays happy, even if it’s faked, when around her. I became the “little drummer boy” through this if you’re familiar with that song. Avoid asking questions about the past, this is really hard to do though. If she speaks of the past it’s likely to be the distant past so try to let her tell as much of the story as she wants. Let her direct the conversation and just go with the flow when she messes up. You’ll see the signs or expressions on her face when she realizes that she’s slipped up so just scoot over next to her and put your arm around her. Change the subject if she gets stuck. Love conquers all in these situations. Now I suggest that you or your parents read the descriptions in some of my other videos in this playlist as there’s going to useful information in them that could help you through this. Not only you but it’s likely to bring your grandmother into a mental state that she really doesn’t care that she is forgetting things. I personally feel that this vacillation between being in her normal mind and the mental state where she senses she’s losing control is what causes this combativeness. We all feel a bit of frustration when we’re forgetting things or in unfamiliar circumstances. This is normal behavior for us but for someone with dementia it’s compounded or amplified. All in all you’re too young to have to deal with this but life is like this sometimes. Who knows maybe this will help you on your career path moving forward? You sound very compassionate and the medical community needs more compassionate people! I am a spiritual person and I know that God gave me the courage to help my mother in her time of need. It’s like all the roads in my life lead me to the place I needed to be in order to be here for mom. Thank you very, very much for your kindness and I will keep your family in my prayers! 🙏🏻

I’m hoping that you’re dealing well with everything that you’re going through and of course your grams is going through. It’s a few months since our conversation and I know if she’s still with us then things have progressed. Stay strong either way.

@@randygreen007 Thank you so much for your compassion, I am utterly speechless. She is in fact still with us, and though it's progressing, I've found ease in it over the past eight months; learning how to deal with the situation carefully and knowing that her behaviour isn't done out of malice. Thank you for sharing your moments with your mother; seeing this video really was a changing point in how I perceived dementia.

This should be our goal right!!??!!?? ❤️ Your kindness and your light brightens the world. Let it shine, please let it shine! 🙏

Thank you for your kindness and support. I really needed to hear your words as they are a blessing as well. I don’t hear much, if at all from my family, so knowing that these videos touch you or help you and others see a part of this disease they wouldn’t normally be able to see is a blessing to. This was really hard but missing mom is harder than I expected it would be. We were very close so there wasn’t even a second thought about needing to do this for her, for both of us. I promise there will be more videos and I have a very special one that I’m working on now that will be ready for Christmas. It’s hard watching these videos that I’m putting together for it but it’s going to happen soon. God bless you and thanks again for your kindness. ❤️

Thanks for watching. I need to organize these into a playlist so everyone can find them.

Thanks for saying that. It was difficult to put that video together for many reasons but I know my mother would always be there for anyone in need. Just like she was for all of her children and even for her brothers and sisters throughout the years. Mom was our rock! ❤️

Thank you. I appreciate your kind words. I am truly sorry that you’re experiencing this along with your mother. I’m finding that doing these videos is helpful to so many people and in a way it allows my mom to do what she loved best, nurturing and caring for others. Especially her family. I mention a few different things in the descriptions that might be helpful to you and your mother. I certainly wish you all the strength and courage to face what’s ahead. This is something you might be interested in watching. There’s a helpful community in the comments as well. kzbin.info/www/bejne/lXrchHyVbLGLo68

That’s very kind of you. Thank you.

Thank you and I hope it helps in some way.

Thanks and trust me He has. ❤️

That’s sweet thanks. She was a special mother.

Thanks for taking the time to watch. ❤️

Thank you so much and mom would definitely agree 😉🤣. I am looking forward to sharing more in the future but watching all the saved videos that I have is kinda hard right now. Soon though.

@@randygreen007 I understand. I lost my brother last year, exactly one year and one day apart from your mum's passing. He was also very sick towards the end and we cared for him at home. I still haven't brought myself to do certain things, like listening to his voice messages or open his Netflix account. Definitely take your time. And there will be things which you will want to keep just for yourself, and that's alright too. Sending you all the strength to walk the path of grief. 💓

@@luciahoneybee I guess we have more in common than maybe we realized as we lost my brother just over 20 years ago and I was here to help mom through that period as well. I understand your pain. 💔 I honestly feel that losing him was the fracture that kicked off mom’s dementia. She never really recovered completely from that. I’ve watched mom get knocked down and then watched her get right back up only to be knocked down again and again. There’s nothing stronger than a mother’s resolve to provide for her children. And your are right there are definitely things I will keep to myself. Some of the family’s behavior through these periods wouldn’t be believable to outsiders anyway. I’ve been told that the pain of this type of loss will fade over time but I don’t believe this to be true. I think that the size of the pain we experience is equal to the amount of love that we had/have and we just learn to grow bigger than the pain. I 🙏🏻 you have a period of growth and you’re able to find balance soon.

@@randygreen007 Oh wow, we definitely have had very similar experiences. My mum has also been the strongest person I've ever met all through my brother's diagnosis, illness and final days. The amount of love that she has for us is infinite, I always knew for sure that there was nothing she wouldn't do for us, so when I knew that we were going to lose my brother, I was also terrified for my parents, especially my mum. But then they both showed unbelievable strength, calm and collectedness, and so much more love and tenderness than ever. I was amazed. Now that he's gone, however, there is nothing to do, nowhere to go, nobody to stay strong and care for, nothing but miss him. And I worry that it will take a toll on them. I try to keep a close eye because, while they seem to be doing well enough, I worry that the grief of losing a child might be too much for anyone. I'm so glad that you were able to be there for your mum in such a loving, selfless way. I aspire to be half as generous, because they definitely deserve it. Thank you for your inspiration 💛

@@luciahoneybee Their strength and resolve definitely shows through you. Thank you for reaching out and sharing with me. Just continue to be there for one another and everything thing else will fall into place. It’s true though that your family has changed forever but as long as you keep shining a light on each other you’ll rise above it all. 🙏🏻❤️

Two left feet with a little rhythm is better than none!

@@randygreen007 Rhythm is my other problem.

@@joewoodchuck3824 That would present a problem.

1990.

@@randygreen007 I'm beginning to make arrangements to have my parents live with me so that my Mom can take care of my Dad without any stresses of life to deal with on top of things. You're an inspiring figure to me for the compassion you showed to your Mom. You my friend are a True Man in my eyes....so beautiful man🙏 I began watching your videos to get a feel for what paths my Dad may go down in the future here but I got soo much more. Thank you Randy....

@@Cdnguy703 Thank you for reaching out to me and saying these kind words. I had debated whether or not to put these videos online because of their sensitive nature but something deep in my heart told me it was the right thing to do. My mother was the kind hearted person that was always willing to help anyone in need so to me doing this is a continuation of her legacy. There are several other videos I have planned in the future but they are a little hard to put together right now since my mother passed so recently. Please know that every journey with dementia is different but there are definitely some similarities that you and your parents are going to face. From what little I know about your situation it sounds like you could use some guidance from a doctor that I discovered on here albeit a little late in my journey with mom. It was refreshing though to see that the things that I had learned through this process were exactly what was needed. This combined with the medical training I had already had made for an overall positive experience for mom and me. Just know there are going to be some incredibly hard times ahead for you and your family but always know that if you can hold their hands when they are walking through the darkest valley of their lifetime then you have done an incredibly great thing. It wasn’t even a question to me if I would do this and in fact if my mom walked down the driveway today asking me to do it again I’d tell her that her bedroom is the same as when she left so come on in. ❤️ Here’s a couple of links that you might find helpful in your situation. I don’t want to overwhelm you with information but you’re going to need all the help you can get. Please don’t hesitate to ask or reach out at anytime. If your dad is still driving contact the DMV where you live and explain your situation so they can call him in for a reevaluation. If he ends up losing his license they will take the heat and not you. The smallest of things in any situation can send them into a rage that can become combative. If he’s still involved in using the stove make sure to trip the breakers to it when no one is home with him. Dr. Natalie kzbin.info/www/bejne/pIWmk4WLqteMZ8k Also research 40Hz Gamma light and binaural beats sound as these combined had a positive effect on my mother. This should bring you some comfort as well. Just know there are a lot of people and resources available. kzbin.info/www/bejne/lXrchHyVbLGLo68 There’s a lot of helpful information in the comments as well. ❤️

Thank you and few people understand what going through this is like. I guess that’s a good thing though as few people can handle it. You’re a strong person regardless of what you may think. As long as you were able to elevate their condition and help them in their darkest valley then you did just fine.