My husband and I stared watching your other KZbin channel before I went to Cheng Mai this year.. I felt personal connection with you guys, because I lived in Vancouver for total two years when I was in my twenties, and I experienced living in 4 other countries before I married my husband at age 35. my husband and I tried to have a baby for 5 years immediately after marriage, We went through IVF and all, but at the age 40, we decided to adopt instead. After going through the journey, looking back, I can't imagine going through it all without my husband fully involved. Our life literally changed 180 degrees different from the life before. We were lucky to hold our adoptive son on the day of his birth, but from the day to the next few years were sleepless and juggling job and parentfood was far more 'adventure' than what I experienced prior! It was stressful, but soothing mentally at the same time. Overflowing of love to my son was such that I never thought it was possible. Flora, One thing I want to say is, You have all the right to be 'selfish' about your own life. When someone tells you 'You are selfish,' a lot of times, they want to steer you to their own 'selfish' motifs. As two mature adults, it is ideal each can respect and help eachother's desire in life to be fullfilled. I think tears are a lot of times a cry from your innate self. I hope you both come to the honest conclusion. I hope you have no cloud of doubt when your life candle is about to blow off, and you feell your life was enjoyed at the fullest..

Such an interesting open chat. I've travelled the world as an entertainer from a young age and choose not to have a child as it never fitted into my plan or lifestyle, I'm now 61 and I still don't regret this decision and I also don't feel I missed out. It was the right decision for me totally. ❤

Thank you so much for sharing ! It was so insightful to hear how your thoughts and feelings have evolved over the years. My partner and I are also childfree and as we're approaching 2025 in a few months, we're saddened to still feel pressured by friends and family and by society. It's crazy to think in this day and age, it's still deemed appropriate to ask someone at a dinner party " when are you having kids". They don't even ask " do you want kids" because they think it's the traditional default option after marriage. When we say no, we get steered to explain and receive unsolicited advice that we will regret it and that we will change our minds. God forbid we ever say that to someone expecting a child or planning to start a family. We should all just be respectful for everyone's wishes and life choices and stop asking people what they plan on doing with their reproductive organs like it's a casual topic of discussion. In the end of the day, I guess us childfree couples have to accept we are the minorities but representation on social media matters 💗 You guys make such a great team and a family of two is a GREAT family! Sending love to you guys!

It’s taken us a couple of days to read through all the responses to our latest podcast, and we’re truly touched by how much this topic resonated. Thank you for the heartfelt comments and for sharing your own stories about choosing to have, or not have, children. We want to emphasize that we’re sharing this conversation now because we feel genuinely happy and fulfilled, with or without children, and the relationship we’ve built over the years is stronger than ever. Life is always evolving, and while this path wasn’t always what we envisioned, it’s one we’ve chosen with intention and care, and it feels right for us now. Who knows what the future holds? Thank you for being part of this open conversation-it means a lot to have this space to connect with all of you.

DO NOT HAVE CHILDREN. PERIOD. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

in a few years once this jackass gets bored of traveling he'll have kids with a younger woman. mark my words

with or without a child, you guys can be just as happy. love all your content creations. sending warm wishes your way. ❤️

There’s a lot of people who have children and wish they could explore the world like the both of you so don’t feel pressured. I’m glad I have nephews and niece and I love them very much and the joy they bring but I’m also glad I don’t have to deal with changing diapers or vomit, or other inconveniences I see my siblings have to deal with when we go on road trips. Even couples with children need baby sitters every now and then just to get some sanity. Don’t rush. Keep traveling and exploring and enjoying life. ✌️

Rip no kids

I wasn't a nice uncle to my nephews and niece, meaning I didn't know or really care about kids at all. I was into myself and doing what I wanted to do. That was my identity and in North America, your identity is what you tell people. When you're married and later have kids, your identity is interwoven into their timelines and narrative. It's been an incredible journey and I have grown in phases, to places I never thought I would feel or think I would be this person, father and husband. I got married at 37 and I'm now in my late 40s. It's not for everyone, and many of my friends never got married or had kids. I didn't do it for anyone, it just evolved to what it is now.

I love you both, but this was a difficult video to watch and I’m sure it was extremely difficult video for you to make. Note, I really like you, but I think this is going to come back to haunt you later. I never agree with being deceitful or tricking somebody especially when it’s somebody that should be the most important person to you and someone you love. I’m not saying you tricked her necessarily, but you were deceptive and that’s never right. As someone who is older than you guys let me give you an example of something. Say 2 people get divorced and the mother has majority custody of the kids and trash talks the father to them and keeps them from seeing him very often because she is being selfish and wants the kids to herself. That probably works for many years and the kids only know their mom and have a very tight relationship with her. But then as they get older they realize they were missing out on a relationship with their father and then they start to develop a relationship with their father. Soon they begin to resent their mother A LOT for all the years she denied them a relationship with their father. In the end, her selfishness and putting what she wants above her children will cause her to have a worse relationship with her children when they’re older. This is just another perspective and something to think about. I wish nothing but the best for you both and I think you would make amazing parents. There are KZbinrs called flying the nest that have small children and travel with them and it makes their travel adventures and videos even more amazing than they were before. Flora if you really want a child, then you have to put yourself first before him and before your marriage. Remember, you should always put yourself first. Note put himself and his wants needs and desires before you and that doesn’t sit well and it shouldn’t. If he changes his mind later in 10 or 20 years, he can still easily father a child but you don’t have that same luxury. if this is what you want, then you go do it now. if you truly loves you, he will support you and stick around. And if he doesn’t, then, I think that tells you all you need to know. I know this sounds tough and harsh, but this is too big and serious subject to sugarcoat it and time is only ticking away. Not only do you not want to resent him later but worse than that would be resenting yourself.

Married old because I prefer freedom. After 8 years of marriage and happily without kids, what a joy and blessing to have kids. They matured us and moved us on with greater purposes and a sense of what marriage is about. Children are the most precious gift to my marriage. At age 41, I had my firstborn. He is 18, and came 'the social butterfly', 16, oh boys, never a burden but joy, joy, joy!

Selfish bunch pass

I am a husband and can definitively share that usually, the main reason men do NOT want to have kids are simply selfishness. It is definitely not the wife (Flora). We (I and my wife) got married late due to a series of unfortunate past-relationships as well as my own selfishness in my younger years. My wife gave birth when she was 35 and I was a few years older. I can see that Flora is very mature and Note is not, I'm sorry to say. I hope he does some self-reflection. Kids will also force him to learn to be mature as well, but may be this is something that he is not willing to do at the moment. With that said, the phrase "opposites attract" are also true. I can still see that Flora though getting old, is not giving up the hope. You can adopt and at the same time have your own kids. I am asking Note: "If he really love Flora, why is he not willing to give up his freedom for Flora wishes". Have you ever heard the word "Agape (love)"? I am saying all these not to condemn, but just try to be honest. Hopefully I am not offending Note. Our approach of life is based on biblical perspective. At the end "love" is easier said than done.

I used to think that having kids wasn't for me, but now that I have one, it's truly the best thing that ever happened to us. Becoming parents has completely transformed our outlook on life in ways we never expected. I hope you guys make the decision soon. It's an experience that’s so rewarding, and there’s nothing quite like it.

I think having a child could probably be the most exciting travel/adventure you could have. But it likely requires that perspective before taking it on. I’m sure when you went to China for the first time, you have to mentally prepare yourself for a good time! On a somewhat related note, end of life people usually say they regret the opportunities not taken. Regardless of what decisions you or I make, I always find this incredibly insightful. Thank you both for your videos and vulnerability. ❤

My wife works at a senior living facility and every day she came home and she talked about people who have kids and grandkids who came to visit them and the residents who have no kids and no one came to visit them. Worst they have to leave the facility and they have no one to check on them at home. I have 5 beautiful grandkids and they are at my house every day and it's a blessing. It would be better for you both to have kids before you turn 40 while you still have strength and high energy . Note watching your wife giving birth is the most treasurable event that you will love your wife more.

Hi guys, you guys are my fav and have been follwing you guys since a few years back. I just wanted to write in to tell you that you guys are very real and many times i feel like im travelling with you both. Ive travelled widely as well but am getting on with age and travel much less so im still travelling through you. You both put a smile on my face when i open my youtube and i see something new from you both. God Bless you both with whatever you both want.

really valued the open and honest conversation Note and Flora. I could 100% relate to Note's reasonings, I value my freedom above anything else and I would end up resenting giving that up. I think there will be some regret no matter which pathway you both choose - no path is better than the other - just different. Really enjoying the video podcast x

You're settling, Flora. Don't settle. When you spoke about how much love you can offer to someone, that motherness came through. You can always travel again, but can you have a baby later? NO! (And this is coming from someone who doesn't have kids - met and married older).

Wow, this is such a honest and brutal conversation. Props for sharing this with the world. I guarantee that you aren't the only couple going through these thoughts. Hopefully by sharing your story, you can bring clarity to others.

Everyone’s life is different, but we are here to experience joy. There is no one way. There is a maturity tho about giving up your needs to have a child. Possibly Some ppl become parents for the wrong reason, to fill a need/purpose. But there is a magic in becoming a parent, in that regardless of your intention…you completely change …your life perspective changes. You need so much less to be happy. You replace freedom + serving yourself… with connection + joy of seeing your child happy. You sacrifice your needs and then as your child ages, and you have more freedom again, you realize that you actually need a lot less to be happy. This is the gift! You get another chapter of life once your child is an adult but it is lived in total appreciation bc your expectations + needs are lower + your appreciation for new experiences (like travel) is so much deeper 💜

as a parent to two, I can say I had the mentality like Note. When it comes down, you feel selfish and feel you cant give enough for a child or that you dont want to give it up. I was also late to have kids and i was Notes age when I had my 2nd. If you decide you want to have a child, its not too late for Note, as a father. Child brings different joys to your life. Traveling is a big harder but you can still do it. Mark Weins brings his son around

I don’t think Flore is happy…and saying to people that you guys are not planning to have children is protecting Note from appearing selfish to other people and Al’s protecting yourself from the empathy people would want to share regarding this decision that was not yours Flores. Couples therapy is recommended.

Flora, it was unfair that he did not tell you, and was just hoping that YOU change. You are still young! I had my son at 36. I hope you follow your heart.

Thank you for this testimony, very moving. The problem as I feel it listening to Note, is that he is afraid that having a child will annihilate his sacrosanct freedom to travel, to do what he wants for the rest of his life. But today, with the progress of medicine, you both still have at least 40 to 50 years of life ahead of you, including at least 30 in good health. This leaves you plenty of time to have and raise one or more children, and then be free again to do what you want, while having given Flora the possibility of being what she most deeply wants, to be a mother. As for adoption: I had 4 children, one of whom was adopted. For me there has never been any difference between my children, because I am a father, I am not the one who gave birth. Note, perhaps you should understand that for Flora, the perspective would be significantly different between having a baby and adopting a baby. Whatever you eventually choose, best of luck to both of you!

It’s easier to say you could do something better when you’re not in the situation. 😂

Thank you for sharing and being honest

When young childless may b good. But once old n a spouse die U will regret.

Thank you for sharing such an intimate conversation. When it comes to children, I feel as if I’m a mix of you two so it was like watching the two sides of my brain talk to each other. Wish you both happiness with whatever you decide ❤

Thanks for sharing and being so honest!

I respect your choice either way. I just had my first child at 45 and you can definitely travel the world. I did when he was 6 months. Best thing ever

Firstly, you two will benefit with couple's therapy. The main thing that bothered me about the conversation was how neither of you are honest with each other nor yourselves. You're both talking past each other, and it's painful to watch, even as a stranger. Note's position on the topic is clear. He doesn't want kids. Yet he strings Flora along with comments like, "If we get pregnant....in the future I'll love to adopt." It's manipulative. Bro's strategy is literally running out the clock till he doesnt have to have the conversation anymore. Meanwhile, it's painfully obvious Flora still wants children. She says she's warmed up to the idea and "it's okay not having kids." To me, it sounds like shes the only one compromising and sacrificing. You only live one life and to describe a life changing decision as being just "okay" is, frankly, heartbreaking to hear. I'm not saying you should or shouldn't have kids. But you two clearly aren't on the same page and have some more hard conversations/decisions ahead. If you truly love each other, you need to approach each other with more honesty.

Note really should have told you near the start of the relationship that he didn’t want kids. I understand he was young and selfish at the time. It’s too big a thing to not disclose. I can really feel Flora’s anguish…she could end up resenting him, if she doesn’t have the child that she obviously desires.

Note, I can understand your unwillingness to have a baby. I was the same as you not wanting to have a baby, but I told my wife in advance before we got married.. Anyway, I wish you two a joyful life

Flora, you seem so lovely and I think you would make the most amazing mum. Children really don’t restrict your freedoms. They open your mind and heart in ways you never thought possible. I’ve travelled before and after kids and for me it’s so much more exciting and fulfilling with children.

This was really sad. Note is extremely selfish. Particularly in the way he's denying Flora a child, seeing the pain it causes her, and then joking about what a great dad he would be. Flora is too kind to see how he's enjoying the power he has over her.

Flora will definitely be a great mother. Note should give her a baby. Hey, they can still travel with the baby just like Mark Weins

Relationships are tough. God Bless you both for your honesty and the courage to post this. May your relationship go from strength to strength ❤

I'm a bit older than you. Let me offer my two cents for what it's worth. As a guy it's really disturbing how we see women get baby fever from seeing their friends have babies. It's like it's the new trendy crop top of the season or something equally irrelevant. Except you can't return it and it'll cost you over a million bucks. Baby fever, not cool. If you genuinely want a baby and have thought it though, great. Another thing. No parent will ever admit to you or themselves in real life that having kids can really really suck. They say useless stuff like it's the best thing that ever happened to me while they complain about how tired they are. I will admit that having kids sucks and might have been a mistake for me. And it might be ok for other people. There's no right answer. Lastly don't ever let anyone tell you that a love for an animal isn't as worthy as love for a baby. I can think of 50 ways a dog or cat are a better choice in reality. Good luck

You guys are REALLY good podcasters WOW! ❤ Just watched your conversation on children and now we're here. Absolutely love how candid, honest, and vulnerable you guys are. It's truly incredible. Subscribed! 🥳

I’m 21 years old listening to people in their late 30’ discussing about this topic. Thank you for this video. I listened to it as a whole.

"I am.." (your answer to Note's question whether you are satisfied). For me the most telling sentence about you. It seems that you have found yourself within and become a stronger confident woman. It's the way you said it, determined and convincing.

Hi Flora and Note. Love your raw and emotional discussion about this tough topic. You know what, do what's right for you know guys and don't let the social pressure get in way of your happiness. I don't understand how people have the right to tell you how to live your life . Maybe they're just jealous of your carefree lifestyle. Keep travelling and continue doing with what brings you happiness 😊

Just stumbled on this vlog and I am so hurt on her behalf. As a third party looking into what they are sharing, dude was straight out selfish and mean. He trapped her. She on the other hand should also have been clear about wanting babies. There are some dreams that cannot be differed, because time is an actual thing. His lying, because he did lie robbed her of the opportunity to make a true choice and that is the sad part. I wish them the best and hope she will be able to live with the grief of a lost dream. Mr Note...you did her dirty!!

I’m still watching this video but I recommend you consider extracting your eggs or fertilizing your eggs and sperm into embryos that you can use later.

Thanks for the warm and authentic podcast that bring tears to my eyes on such a tough topic. And it is great that u guys mentioned about adopting coz it is a great alternative when one day u guys decide. It will be so lucky for any orphan to be adopted by you both. Much love.

Very heartfelt. Yeah we think you guys, are awesome. You are a good team. Hoping for all the best for you two guys.

I always said I wouldn't bring a child into this fd up world but my partner tricked me twice😂😂she had our second at 37 so don't think it's too late. In saying that, there are lots of unwanted kids to adopt and l think you guys would be excellent parents, especially as Note was adopted himself 😊 Then again the world is very unstable atm and at anytime we could all be fighting for survival, and having a child would make it even more difficult 😮

I will say it is definitely OK to be "selfish" to lead your best life before having a kid. Having children is really a life long and v v big commitment! it is not selfish at all, bcos ultimately we should put ourselves first regardless whether having children or not. It is way worse if anyone were not to be content/happy with themselves and life and be full of regrets before starting a family. I will think Flora's friend def made that remark bcos of her own jealousness, I mean it's everyone's dream to travel for living!!! Anything that other ppl say are really just "noise", as they are not YOU! Anyways, I hope Note heals from his childhood hurts before coming to a decision whether or not to have a kid. And whichever decision you both make, for Flora to hv be at peace with it. Just from a bystander's POV, you guys look like you all can be rlly good parents!!! it's not too late!!! it's really alot of work but def, it's a worthwhile journey i guess.. Sending hugs and love <3<3<3